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  • Family of 7 takes in 82-year-old widower neighbor as their new ‘grandpa’
    Photo credit: via USA Today – Paul Callahan, 82, with the Caraballo family.
    ,

    Family of 7 takes in 82-year-old widower neighbor as their new ‘grandpa’

    “You get many chances to talk to people. If you don’t take a chance, you may miss a friend.”

    Tod Perry

    Upworthy Staff

    In 2022, the Caraballo family welcomed a new member: their neighbor from across the street, Paul Callahan, who was 82 at the time. Callahan, a widower, lost his wife prior to the Caraballos moving in. It makes sense their new neighbor was feeling lonely, but a beautiful friendship was on the way. After their initial meeting, Callahan quickly became like a grandfather to the Caraballos, a family of seven, and the story went viral. Various publications and news outlets covered the heartwarming blended family and they were even invited to appear on Good Morning America and The Kelly Clarkson Show.

    South West News Service first reported the whole story, writing that when Sharaine, then 32, and Wilson Caraballo, then 42, moved their family of seven into a new home in Pawtucket, Rhode Island in 2022, they weren’t sure how they’d be received. “Our biggest fear moving into a new neighborhood was, ‘What if our neighbors don’t like us?’ What if, because we have a lot of kids, they make a lot of noise and we come from a big family, so what if there’s any conflict with the neighbors?” Sharaine told USA Today. “We’re the only Black family in our neighborhood.”

    Then their neighbor showed up with a ladder

    But all that fear quickly dissipated when their new neighbor, Callahan, showed up with a ladder and offered to help the family spruce up their new home.

    “He was coming over with tools. He’d bring screwdrivers and teach Wilson how to fix up the garage, and Wilson followed all his advice,” Sharaine told South West News Service. The octogenarian soon became a fixture at the Caraballo house. Now, Callahan stops by nearly every day and can always be found at the family’s cookouts, gatherings, and holidays.

    He’s not the neighbor anymore, he’s family

    Callahan has become a great friend to the family’s children, whom he entertains with stories from his past. “The kids run up to him like that’s their grandfather,” Sharaine said. “Paul is definitely a family member. He’s no longer considered a neighbor.”

    Callahan believes that it’s all about taking the time to be friendly.

    “You get many chances to talk to people. If you don’t take a chance, you may miss a friend,” Callahan said. “It doesn’t hurt to be nice. That’s the other thing, it costs you nothing, but a lot of times, you get a better return.”

    The story went viral, and for good reason

    Sharaine keeps her well-wishers updated on the doings of her family, including Callahan, on her Instagram page. Though she hasn’t posted about Callahan specifically since their mini media storm, she keeps posts about their story and media appearance pinned to the top of her page for all to see.

    This article originally appeared three years ago.

    Keep Reading →
  • Feeling lazy, unmotivated, and ashamed of it? Doctor says it could be undiagnosed ADHD.
    Doctor breaks down how to recognize ADHD in adults.
    ,

    Feeling lazy, unmotivated, and ashamed of it? Doctor says it could be undiagnosed ADHD.

    “75% of adults with anxiety actually have ADHD as the cause of their anxiety.”

    Jacalyn Wetzel

    Upworthy Staff

    If it seems that everyone is being diagnosed with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), there may be a reason and it’s likely not the reason people think. Diagnostic criteria were initially based on how ADHD presented in white children who were mostly male, so if you fell outside of that box your diagnosis was often overlooked. This is especially true in girls who then turned into undiagnosed or misdiagnosed women.

    But it’s not just women who were undiagnosed since the criteria mostly included ways in which hyperactivity showed up, you know, the “H” in ADHD. But not everyone with ADHD presents with the stereotypical hyperactivity bit.

    A lot of adults slipped through the cracks

    That means a lot of kids fell through the cracks and, as kids do, eventually became adults.

    Family physician and ADHD expert Dr. Heather Brannon breaks down ways in which ADHD is missed and how to identify it in adults in a TEDx Talk in 2021.

    In the first few minutes of the video, Brannon shares a clinical observation that feels mind-boggling

    “75% of adults with anxiety actually have ADHD as the cause of their anxiety.” Even though I fit into that category, consider my mind completely boggled because I thought I was a rarity and my psychiatrist was a magician. Turns out, he was probably just up to date on his continuing education credits.

    Brannon talks about how people who may express feelings of overwhelm, anxiousness, and tiredness and who are easily frustrated may actually have undiagnosed ADHD.

    It’s pretty easy to overlook ADHD that presents with more of the attention deficit part of the diagnosis than the hyperactivity part. When someone is having difficulty sitting still, talking so fast that you can barely keep up, and is constantly on the go, it’s pretty easy to pinpoint there may be an issue.

    But when the person is quiet, sits still but misses large chunks of conversations, or is chronically forgetful and sleepy, it’s much easier to miss the signs, according to Brannon.

    Brannon says many people feel bad about themselves without knowing why, so having an answer for why you’re feeling this way can be helpful.

    Does any of this sound like you?

    In the clip, Brannon introduces us to a theoretical person named Sally.

    Sally is successful, creative, and holds a master’s degree. She’s functioning at a high level by all indications, but Sally struggles with procrastination, getting sidetracked, and feeling unmotivated. She feels lazy and ashamed of it, but she just can’t bring herself to change her behavior.

    Brannon says that Sally is typical of adults with undiagnosed ADHD. These are people who feel and know something is not quite right with them, but they have no idea what.

    As for a little happy ending, Sally eventually finds out that she has ADHD and receives treatment. Brannon says in the video that the right medication can make a world of difference.

    “Now [Sally] can have creative thoughts without having that big swirl of ideas running around in her head. She can look at an email to see if she has time to answer or she needs to save it for later. Now Sally can be on time for her appointment, and that frees up the perfectionist that was trying so hard to be on time before and was failing every time.”

    The numbers are bigger than you’d expect

    Brannon says that over the span of her career, she would estimate about 2 or 3 out of 10 adults have undiagnosed ADHD and are living a life of difficulty and shame.

    “That’s a lot of people who could be feeling a whole lot better,” she says.

    This article originally appeared three years ago. It has been updated.

    Keep Reading →
  • Mom realizes she’s been using the ‘heavy’ setting on her washer wrong for years—and fellow moms are shook
    Photo credit: Image courtesy of @granolabarpan/Instagram (with permission) – Stay-at-home mom Catrina shares shock at learning what the 'heavy' setting on her washer means.
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    Mom realizes she’s been using the ‘heavy’ setting on her washer wrong for years—and fellow moms are shook

    “Today years old when I realize why my blankets are sopping wet.”

    Emily Shiffer

    Upworthy Staff

    Knocking out loads of laundry is a feeling of accomplishment that is unmatched. Depending on what needs to be washed, washing machines offer a variety of settings for the ideal clean. But even the most seasoned laundry pros can admit that they don’t fully understand how to use them properly.

    One mom’s washing machine mistake went viral

    One stay-at-home mom shared her funny and relatable washing machine mistake. Catrina (@granolabarpan) got the shock of a lifetime when she realized that she had been using the “heavy” setting on her washer wrong for years.

    “POV: today years old when it clicks why my blankets are sopping wet!!! I thought HEAVY meant heavy items being washed,” she wrote in the video’s overlay.

    “Heavy on my machine means heavily soiled,” she went on to add in the comments. “I thought it meant the stuff I was putting in the machine was heavy in weight/pounds.”

    Some moms are also realizing this for the first time. “Ok.. so I am 66 years old learning this???!! I always thought that heavy meant weight also ,” one person commented. Another person wrote, “Well I was today years old when I learned what heavy meant too… “

    Turns out, a lot of us have been confused

    Others expressed confusion with so many settings, and reminiscing on simpler times. “Wait a minute. . I think I need to for once go and read the manual because I have been wondering about all of the options,” another user wrote. And another chimed in, “I want my old $250 3 options hot/warm/cold on/off washer back. It didn’t die it rusted out but took 25yrs to do it. I had 5 kids, plus my ex in-laws living with me.”

    Struggling to understand the settings on your washing machine? You’re not alone.

    “Knowing these settings helps avoid common laundry mistakes, such as using the heavy cycle for heavy fabric weight instead of heavy soil, which can lead to ineffective cleaning or damage over time,” Vanessa Ruiz, a professional organizer at Sparkly Maid San Antonio, tells Upworthy.

    Washing machine settings explained

    These are five washing machine settings and how they work:

    1. Normal/Regular Cycle

    Ruiz explains that this is your typical setting for day-to-day loads such as t-shirts, jeans, sheets, and underwear.

    “These laundry loads are typically washed in warm water and the setting is rinsed with medium spin speeds through agitation in order to properly clean moderately soiled garments,” she says. “This cycle is safe enough to wash a variety of different fabric content with a somewhat dirty load.”

    2. Delicate/Gentle Cycle

    Ruiz notes that the delicate cycle is created specifically for delicate fabrics—lingerie, silk, lace, or embellished clothing—that may become damaged in a normal or regular wash.

    “This cycle will use moderate spin speeds through gentle agitation to thoroughly dry clean and not damage clothes too easily,” says Ruiz. “This is the preferred cycle when laundry items that require extra care or are labeled ‘delicate’ or ‘hand wash’ need to be washed.”

    3. Heavy Duty Cycle

    The heavy duty cycle is specifically for heavily soiled items like work clothes, kitchen towels, and bedding.

    “This setting uses higher water temperatures, longer wash times, and powerful agitation to remove stubborn dirt and grime. It’s perfect for those tough laundry jobs, but not recommended for delicate fabrics,” explains Ruiz.

    4. Bulky/Bedding Cycle

    This cycle is often confused with “heavy.”

    “This cycle accommodates larger, heavier items that absorb a lot of water, such as comforters, pillows, and sleeping bags,” says Ruiz. “It uses more water, medium spin speeds, and longer wash times to thoroughly clean bulky items without causing damage or imbalance.”

    5. Quick Wash

    In a rush? This is the perfect setting to use.

    “It is an accelerated wash cycle designed for small loads of lightly soiled clothes, usually lasting 15 to 40 minutes,” says Ruiz. “It’s great for when you need clean clothes fast and can save energy compared to longer cycles.”

    Mystery solved

    So the next time your blankets come out of the wash sopping wet, or your delicates come out looking worse for wear, you’ll know exactly where things went wrong. A little knowledge about what each cycle actually does can save you time, energy, and a lot of unnecessary re-washing. And honestly, if you’ve been doing it wrong for years? You’re in very good company.

    This article originally appeared one year ago. It has been updated.

    Keep Reading →
  • An errant pitch hit a Little League player in the head. His response was peak sportsmanship.
    Photo credit: Canva – A viral video from a Little League game has people celebrating good sportsmanship.
    ,

    An errant pitch hit a Little League player in the head. His response was peak sportsmanship.

    An unforgettable moment.

    Annie Reneau

    Upworthy Staff

    Youth sports have gotten more intensely competitive, to the point where overeager parents and coaches have to regularly be reminded to take it down a notch. So when humanity takes precedence over team rivalries, it’s extra heartwarming.

    And considering how many “kids these days” laments we see coming from older generations, it’s also heartening to see kids showing excellent character qualities when no one directly asked them to.

    A viral video from a Little League baseball game is giving us a nice dose of both—good sportsmanship and basic human kindness from two players from opposing teams.

    As reported by USA Today, Isaiah (Zay) Jarvis, a batter from Oklahoma, took a pitch from Texas East pitcher Kaiden Shelton right to the side of his helmet. It was a hard blow that caused Jarvis to spin around and crumble to the ground, grabbing his head. The replay in slow motion shows that the ball basically just knocked his helmet off, though it was undoubtedly jarring and probably painful as well.

    Jarvis was able to continue playing, but Shelton was shaken up. No matter how fierce the competition, no one wants to be responsible for injuring another person. He was visibly upset on the mound, so Jarvis left first base and approached him.

    Here is what actually happened on that field

    That a kid this age would approach a player who hit him with a ball and comfort him with a hug, especially knowing that all eyes were on him, is just so lovely. Someone raised this young man to put people’s feelings ahead of competitiveness and not worry about what others might think.

    And the fact that the pitcher was so distraught at the possibility of having hurt someone is also so sweet. This was a moment that showed the true character of both of these boys, and both of them exemplified caring and compassion.

    The internet was moved to tears

    People praised the boys’ empathy and humanity.

    “Both of those boys are what you want your kids to aspire to,” wrote one commenter. “One willing to forgive and knows it wasn’t intentional and the other showing remorse and sorrow. I love it!!”

    Thankfully, these kids aren’t some one-off anomaly. We see examples of kindness and empathy all the time in sports. Despite how fierce competition can get, enjoyment of the game and the self-improvement on all levels that comes with playing is what it’s all about, and many coaches and parents strive to make sure that their kids are learning all of those lessons.

    This video demonstrates even more than simple respect for an opponent. It shows that this kid recognized his opponent’s humanity first and foremost. He didn’t just say, “It’s no problem.” He recognized that the pitcher had feelings of his own and wanted to make surehe was okay. That’s a whole other level of sportsmanship to strive for, one that takes nothing away from strong competition and doing your best to win.

    This went beyond good sportsmanship

    The moment has had a lasting impact on both boys. In a follow-up by ESPN, Jarvis reflected, “I don’t think it’s changed me, but it’s changed my lifestyle. People know me, and so I always need to be doing the right thing.” The two became friends, and their story is now held up as a symbol of what youth sports should look like.

    Many adults could even learn from the emotionally intelligent and empathetic interaction of these two kids. Good sportsmanship all around. Love to see it. Big kudos to these kiddos and whoever raised them.

    This article originally appeared four years ago. It has been updated.

    Keep Reading →
  • Tennessee student stands up to school board with fiery speech after a member called her ‘hot’

    Photo credit: Canva Photos

    A microphone and a teenage girl.
    ,

    Tennessee student stands up to school board with fiery speech after a member called her ‘hot’

    “I believe that you are all cowards.”

    Evan Porter

    An April 2 Washington County School Board meeting in Tennessee took an uncomfortable turn after high school student Hannah Campbell finished delivering her remarks. Seated with the board and directly next to the superintendent, Campbell confidently participated in a discussion with members after presenting research she had conducted on other schools.

    That’s when the board member seated next to her, Keith Ervin, reached over, put his arm around her, and said, “God, you’re hot, you know that? Where do you go to school at?”

    What happened next

    The comment is not a baseless allegation. The interaction was caught on video. A few people in the room laughed, Campbell herself quickly brushed off the comment, and the meeting continued as scheduled. Any viewer watching the meeting in person or on YouTube could clearly see what happened.

    To many, it was clear that a line had been crossed, and the mood in the room was tense afterward.

    The board chair, Annette Buchanan, called an emergency meeting the following week, where members voted to censure Ervin—a public rebuke meant to show that they did not support his comments. But otherwise, as an elected official, Ervin would keep his position on the board.

    For his part, Ervin issued a statement apologizing for the incident but insisting that he had not meant any harm.

    “I understand why people are reacting the way they are. But that’s not the full conversation, not even close,” he wrote. “When I mentioned she was hot, I meant she was on a roll. It was nothing to do with her appearance.”

    The board’s response was not good enough for Campbell, who was also unconvinced by the apology statement.

    Student boldly appears at another board meeting to speak up for herself

    Campbell refused to shrink or hide. Instead, she returned to a school board meeting on May 7 and confronted not just Ervin, but the entire board, in a courageous four-minute speech.

    “I do not forgive you,” she said to Ervin, adding, “The failure to act on the board’s behalf was and is equivalent to his actions, and it has hurt me just as much. To watch the chairperson be so quick to bang her gavel, to control the public, yet not use it once to control her own peer was disgusting … I believe that you are all cowards.”

    She sarcastically thanked the board at the end of her speech for showing her that she would do well not to trust adults and authority figures to stand up for her—that she would have to do it herself.

    The student’s brave stand earned the support of the community

    Campbell was wrong about one thing: There were others in the community who were willing to stand up for her.

    One irate father vowed to raise enough money to oust every single board member should they fail to act. “Would you want your kid around that guy without a camera around? I wouldn’t,” he said.

    Meanwhile, an online petition calling for Ervin’s removal from the board, along with Superintendent Jerry Boyd’s, has collected nearly 7,000 signatures.

    Even more enraging to parents, students, and community members is the fact that Ervin has been accused of inappropriate conduct before. According to WCYB-TV, records show that in 2009, Ervin made a “lewd, juvenile gesture of a sexual nature” in front of students and teachers at a school. He was censured then and barred from school property unless accompanied.

    Campbell’s willingness to use her voice may be the difference between a censure and something that makes a real difference for all the students who come before the board after her.

    Keep Reading →
  • The empowering advice Eleanor Roosevelt shared for anyone struggling with self-worth and confidence
    Photo credit: Wikipedia – Eleanor Roosevelt shared her insights on building self-worth and confidence.
    ,

    The empowering advice Eleanor Roosevelt shared for anyone struggling with self-worth and confidence

    “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”

    Emily Shiffer

    Eleanor Roosevelt lived a one-of-a-kind life that included her role as first lady of the United States. Born in 1884, she became a prominent figure in American politics and culture.

    She was also a prolific writer and penned a syndicated newspaper column called “My Day” six days a week from 1935 until her death in 1962.

    In it, she shared the wisdom and advice she had gathered throughout her life. In one column from 1943, Roosevelt offered her confidence-building advice:

    “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”

    Roosevelt’s insightful wisdom centers on separating self-worth from the opinions and perceptions of others and instead turning inward to find value and confidence. Her advice came years after surviving a traumatic childhood and undergoing her own self-discovery.

    Roosevelt’s personal struggle with confidence

    Roosevelt had a tumultuous upbringing. Her mother died of diphtheria when she was only eight years old, and less than two years later, her father died due to depression and alcoholism. She was orphaned by age 10, and Roosevelt’s grandmother, Mary Hall, became her guardian.

    Roosevelt also grew up feeling self-conscious about her appearance and serious demeanor, according to a short biography published by The George Washington University’s Eleanor Roosevelt Papers Project.

    She was given many nicknames, including “Granny,” “very plain,” and “old-fashioned.” Roosevelt once wrote, “I was a solemn child without beauty. I seemed like a little old woman entirely lacking in the spontaneous joy and mirth of youth.”

    Despite these challenges, Roosevelt found her sense of worth and confidence through education. Her grandmother sent her overseas in 1899, when she was 15, to attend Allenswood Academy in London. It was there that she discovered her gift for forming friendships and her love of learning.

    In her autobiography, Roosevelt wrote that she developed “confidence and independence,” adding that she was “totally without fear in this new phase of my life.”

    Roosevelt also wrote about battling people-pleasing. “I was always afraid of something: of the dark, of displeasing people, of failure. Anything I accomplished had to be done across a barrier of fear,” she wrote.

    @jayshetty

    What idea are you discussing today? Elenor Roosvelt’s quote is worth remembering

    ♬ original sound – Jay Shetty

    Tips for building self-worth and confidence

    Building confidence and self-worth is a difficult process that may require intentional effort. Zack Goldman, a psychotherapist and founder of Solid Ground Psychotherapy, shares three helpful tips for anyone struggling with feelings of inferiority:

    Stop treating confidence like a prerequisite for action

    Goldman explains that one of the biggest misconceptions about confidence is that people think they need to feel confident before doing something difficult.

    “In reality, confidence is usually built afterward through repeated experiences of taking action despite discomfort,” he told Upworthy. “Start with small, manageable risks because every time you prove to yourself that you can tolerate uncertainty, rejection, or imperfection, yourself trust grows.”

    Pay attention to how you speak to yourself during difficult moments

    “Many people unknowingly reinforce low self-worth through constant self-criticism, especially when they make mistakes or feel emotionally overwhelmed,” Goldman said.

    He explains that instead of asking, “What’s wrong with me?” try asking, “What would I say to someone I care about in this situation?”

    “Learning to respond to yourself with more fairness and compassion helps create a more stable sense of worth that is not dependent on constant achievement or external validation,” he added.

    Build a life that reflects your values, not just other people’s expectations

    According to Goldman, people often lose confidence when they spend too much time trying to meet standards that do not actually align with who they are.

    “Self-worth becomes much stronger when your decisions, relationships, and goals reflect your own values rather than approval seeking,” he said. “Even small choices that move you toward a more authentic version of yourself can create a deeper sense of confidence and internal stability over time.”

    Keep Reading →
  • 20 years ago his BBC interview became a viral comedy hit. Now, he’s sharing his secret to staying calm
    Photo credit: BBC News/YouTube – Guy Goma realizing he’s in the wrong interview, circa 2006.
    ,

    20 years ago his BBC interview became a viral comedy hit. Now, he’s sharing his secret to staying calm

    Sometimes, it just takes a shift in focus.

    Heather Wake

    Since his accidental 15 minutes of fame in 2006, Guy Goma has been the epitome of keeping calm under pressure.

    The video—in which Goma showed up for a job interview at the BBC and was mistaken for, quite literally, another Guy (technology journalist Guy Kewney)—has gone viral time and time again, thanks in no small part to how well Goma handled the situation after being thrust into a live on-air interview.

    Now, two decades after the wholesome snafu, Goma has decided to impart some wisdom about turning a potentially catastrophic moment into one of pure grace.

    To be fair, Goma admits he wasn’t stoic the entire time

    Speaking to This Morning, Goma said his initial thoughts were, “God help me. I’m lost completely.”

    However, he remembered the words of his mother, who taught him to quietly fix a problem without embarrassing anyone.

    “My mom always says to us, ‘If you notice something, your brother made a mistake anywhere, correct the mistake first before talking to the person,’” he said.

    Not wanting to make anyone else feel uncomfortable, Goma held onto his composure. That was all the fuel he needed to carry on, answering the questions placed before him with such admirable self-possession that viewers still revisit the clip time and time again. Sure, it’s partly for a good laugh, but also because Goma’s chutzpah is undeniably inspiring.

    The hidden Zen wisdom behind all this

    Nearly all of us have experienced a situation where we felt unprepared, overwhelmed, or suddenly put on the spot (if you haven’t, your time is coming). Goma’s response offers a blueprint for surviving those moments with dignity intact. In similarly anxiety-inducing situations, we can direct our attention outside ourselves and aim to simply be of service in whatever way we can muster in the moment, rather than laser-focusing on what we’re experiencing internally. When that happens—when we forego our concept of “I,” as Buddhists say—what once felt insurmountable often suddenly shrinks to its proper size.

    There’s also something to be said for the fact that Goma never appeared bitter about the misunderstanding that made him Internet-famous. Even not getting the job he originally came to interview for, which he shared was heartbreaking at the time, didn’t ultimately defeat his spirit. Over the years, he has retained his humor and warmth, which has only deepened people’s affection for him.

    Life after becoming Internet-famous

    According to Newstalk, Goma now works with people who have learning disabilities. It might not be the job he planned for all those years ago, but it sounds like he’s found work with purpose nonetheless. He also teamed up with Elliott Gotkine, the BBC producer who put him on the air, to release their story in book form as The Wrong Guy: The Inside Story of TV’s Greatest Cock-Up.

    Though we may never find ourselves accidentally talking shop on live television, may we all handle our own unexpected blunders with that same humility and humor. Who’s to say what surprising blessings might come as a result?

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  • Fed-up mom creates ‘TV schedule’ to mimic ’90s television for her kids
    Photo credit: officialstephwise/YouTube – A mom and therapist has a unique hack for bringing back the low-key childhood experience of the ’90s for her kids.
    ,

    Fed-up mom creates ‘TV schedule’ to mimic ’90s television for her kids

    “There are almost no natural limits anymore, so parents have to become the limit.”

    Evan Porter

    We live in an age of unlimited choice, thanks to modern technology. At any given time, most of us have access to the entirety of recorded music, thousands of on-demand movies, and even more individual episodes of our favorite shows.

    This amount of choice is enough to make a person’s brain combust, especially when that person is a child.

    Therapist says “parenting was easier in the 90s” and has a clever idea to fix it

    Stephanie Wise, a licensed couples therapist and coach, recently took to social media to share one of her most effective and unique parenting hacks.

    “Parenting was easier in the 90s (and no one wants to admit why),” the YouTube video headline reads.

    She goes on to explain her favorite hack: “Bring back ’90s tech.”

    “One of the hardest parts of parenting is that everything is available all the time. Every show, every song, every snack, every answer, every distraction. And then we wonder why our kids struggle when the answer is No,” she said.

    Setting up an old tube TV in the living room with only basic channels sounds great, but it isn’t super feasible in the modern world. So what Wise does in her household is create a “TV schedule” in which “certain shows only play on certain days,” she said.

    An example schedule she drew up on a whiteboard shows that Sunday is for Bluey, Wednesday is for Spidey and His Amazing Friends, and Thursday is for Puffin Rock. Other days include a few options—such as The Joy of Painting or Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood, old-school choices—or may call for a movie, where the kids can pick from a limited supply of physical VHS tapes.

    Choices are either extremely limited or nonexistent most days, and it makes her life much simpler.

    “There are almost no natural limits anymore, so parents have to become the limit,” Wise said. “All day long. And it’s so exhausting.”

    This is just one small way she gives everyone a well-deserved mental break.

    Well over a million people watched Wise’s video across YouTube and other social media platforms, with commenters weighing in on how the advice resonated with them.

    “The other thing you’re doing is bringing back that feeling of specialness we had when we couldn’t have everything on demand. That’s priceless,” one person wrote.

    “This is so brilliant. You’re also giving your kids the ability to wait, to be bored, to adapt. Those are invaluable in this instant gratification age,” another wrote.

    The kids are more relaxed with fewer choices and have a new “bad guy” to blame

    Wise says that her TV schedule doesn’t just make her own life easier—it eliminates the daily battles: Can I watch this? How about this? No, I don’t like this. Change it to something else.

    If the kids aren’t happy with what’s on TV, Mom is no longer the bad guy—the schedule is.

    She also turns any frustration into a teachable moment: “I know, babe, waiting is so hard. I wish it was Spidey day, too.”

    Not only are kids more than capable of surviving such a cruel exercise in deprivation, it’s actually good for them. Wise says she uses a similar technique in the car, listening only to the radio (no Spotify), and jokes that sometimes the kids have to deal with “a song they hate and have to survive for three minutes…That’s frustration tolerance, baby.”

    What is frustration tolerance? It shouldn’t come as a huge shock that it’s not great for kids (or anyone) to get exactly what they want all the time. “I try to give her opportunities to learn to cope with frustration, boredom, or disappointment,” Wise said. “I don’t want her to feel overwhelmed or controlled by her emotions, so that’s important to me.”

    Researchers agree with Wise that frustration management is a crucial skill for kids to learn before becoming adults.

    Her method also reduces decision fatigue for all parties involved.

    Decision fatigue, especially in an era of unlimited access, can be absolutely exhausting. Research even shows that people who have to make too many decisions day in and day out can simply give up and suffer from a severe lack of willpower.

    Wise tells Upworthy that she and her husband aim to keep things as simple as possible for themselves when it comes to dinner menus and weekend plans, but it’s even more important for the kids. This is where she breaks from some of the more traditional parenting advice:

    “For kids, we keep it simple. I don’t do choices on things like which cup or plate or spoon. I don’t do choices for clothes. For some kids that might be helpful—let them make ‘unimportant’ choices so they don’t fight the important things—but for my daughter, I found it stressed her out and resulted in way more tantrums.”

    Wise admits, though, that what works for her and her family may not be right for everyone.

    @sarah.sahmdaycare

    We went on a full screen break a few months ago because my kids were just way too attached and overstimulated. Now we watch low stimulation shows and no tablets, phones, etc unless we’re traveling. These are our current favorites and where to find them! 🤍 #toddler #toddlerscreentime #lowstimulatingshows #momsoftiktok #fyp #screentime #toddlertvshows

    ♬ Little Things – Adrián Berenguer

    Wise is part of a growing movement that aims to bring back the lower-stimulation childhood many Millennials and Gen Xers grew up with. Research suggests that the media kids watch can be especially impactful, and slower-paced cartoons like Franklin or Arthur may help children with emotional regulation.

    The data coming to light on modern kids’ television, screen time, and social media is alarming, but opting out completely feels difficult. Wise’s method struck a chord with other parents because it’s a simple tweak that can make a huge difference.

    Keep Reading →
paul callahan, caraballo family, human kindness, family, adopt
Culture

Family of 7 takes in 82-year-old widower neighbor as their new ‘grandpa’

adhd, adult adhd, adhd diagnosis, adhd treatment, doctors, ted talk, tedx, mental health
Health

Feeling lazy, unmotivated, and ashamed of it? Doctor says it could be undiagnosed ADHD.

washer, washing machine setting, how to use washing machine, laundry, laundry tips
Family

Mom realizes she’s been using the ‘heavy’ setting on her washer wrong for years—and fellow moms are shook

little league, baseball, pitcher, sportsmanship
Culture

An errant pitch hit a Little League player in the head. His response was peak sportsmanship.

school, school board, school board meeting, teen, teenagers, teen girl, women, girls, harassment, sexual harassment, bravery, courage
Education

Tennessee student stands up to school board with fiery speech after a member called her ‘hot’

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20 years ago his BBC interview became a viral comedy hit. Now, he’s sharing his secret to staying calm

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parenting, parents, moms, kids, motherhood, modern parenting, millennial parents, tv, screen time, toddlers, tv shows, childhood education
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