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Woman shares her pre-pandemic tattoo as worst case of 'bad timing' in the history of body art

Unbelievable. 😂

Woman shares her pre-pandemic tattoo as worst case of 'bad timing' in the history of body art
via wakaflockafloccar / TikTok

It's amazing to consider just how quickly the world has changed over the past 11 months. If you were to have told someone in February 2020 that the entire country would be on some form of lockdown, nearly everyone would be wearing a mask, and half a million people were going to die due to a virus, no one would have believed you.

Yet, here we are.

PPE masks were the last thing on Leah Holland of Georgetown, Kentucky's mind on March 4, 2020, when she got a tattoo inspired by the words of a close friend.


"We were just talking about things we admire about each other and he said, 'You courageously and radically refuse to wear a mask,' like meaning that I'm undeniably myself. I thought that was a really poetic way of saying that," Holland told Fox 13.

So, she had "courageously & radically refuse to wear a mask" tattooed on her left forearm. It's a beautiful sentiment about Leah's dedication to being her true self. It's also a reminder for Leah to remain true to herself throughout her life.

However, the tattoo would come to have a very different meaning just two days later when the first case of COVID-19 was reported in Kentucky.

"It basically looked like I'm totally, you know, anti-mask or whatever, which is not the case," said Holland.

Now, she was embarrassed to be seen with the tattoo for fear she'd be associated with the anti-maskers who either deny the existence of the virus or refuse to wear a mask to protect others. Either way, it's a bad look.

So Leah started wearing long-sleeve shirts and cardigan sweaters whenever in public to cover up the tattoo.

On Monday, TikTok users asked each other to share their "dumbest tattoo" and she was pretty sure she had the winner.

@wakaflockafloccar #stitch with @hannanicbic I could NOT have had worse timing. #fyp #foryoupage #tattoo #worsttattoo #winner ♬ original sound - wakaflockafloccare

In her video, she talks about how her tattoo was about "not pretending to be something you're not," but then revealed it to show how — after a historical twist — it made her out to be someone she isn't.

"I just kind of wanted people to laugh with me because I think it's funny now, too," said Holland.

Plenty of people on TikTok laughed along with her with one user suggesting she update the tattoo with the phrase: "Hindsight is 2020."

"I was dying laughing. I'm like, I'm glad there are people that find this as funny as I think it is," said Holland.

"It will be a funny story to tell years from now," she said. "I don't think it will ever not be a funny story."

Unfortunately, even when the pandemic is over, Leah will still probably have to explain her tattoo. Because most won't soon forget the COVID-19 era in America and there's no doubt many will still feel passionate about those who refused to wear a mask.


This article originally appeared on 02.24.21

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Family

Mom recalls the uncomfortable moment an older man complimented her 6-year-old's appearance

When she didn't say "thank you," he accused her of having bad manners.

@yourejustliz/TikTok

“Nice is different than kind."

It might have been pretty universally accepted during our childhood for daughters to be expected to reciprocate affection from adults, whether they liked it or not. A non consensual kiss to grandparents here, a forced “thank you” there. But times have changed.

However, this change in parenting style can sometimes make for some, well, awkward or even downright uncomfortable situations as moms and dads try to advocate for this kid’s autonomy.

Recently, a mom named Liz Kindred detailed just such an incident with her six year old daughter, which has a whole lotta other parents discussing how to navigate these unideal interactions.

As she recalls in a video posted to TikTok, Kindred was waiting in line with her daughter when a grown man turned around and said “My goodness, you sure are pretty” to the child.

“My six-year-old is gorgeous, yes, but she is also very in tune and perceptive, and she's an introvert so she grabbed my leg really tight,” Kindred said.

Doubling down, the man repeated himself, saying “You sure are pretty. Look at those blue eyes,” which only made her shy daughter grab her leg harder.

Noting that being in a 12 step program has taught her to be less “knee jerk reactionary,” the mom bit her tongue and offered a polite smile to the man, hoping that would be the end of it. It wasn’t.


@yourejustliz I need to get my brows done
♬ Succession (Theme Song) - The Theme System


“He's a boomer and, God love him, he said, ‘I guess your mom didn't teach you manners.’ And I let out an uncomfortable little [chuckle], and the pause was long. It was long. And under his breath he said, ‘Guess not,’” she said.

In what she called the most ”Jesus loving way” she could muster, while still bluntly making her point, Kindred told the man "If you assume that I didn't teach my six-year-old daughter to say ‘thank you’ to a grown, consenting man when he compliments her appearance, then you would be correct."

What followed was the “longest silence” of Kindred’s life.

The video, which has been viewed over 6 million times now, prompted a ton of parents to share how their own kids have established boundaries in similar situations—with their support, of course.

“An old man called my 4 yr old daughter a sweetheart at the store…she boldly responded ‘I am NOT YOUR sweetheart!’ I was so proud,” on person recalled.

Another added, “My 3 year old says ‘NO THANK YOU MY BODY DOESN’T LIKE TAHT.’”

Still another said “My 2 yo knows the boundaries song and just starts singing that anytime someone talks to her.”

While the response to Kindred’s video was overwhelmingly positive, there were a few comments defending the man as simply being “kind.” This prompted Kindred to do a follow-up video doubling down on her decision.

In the clip, she shared how she herself has dealt with seemingly innocent compliments in her life from men, which later turned into something else. Feeling like she “didn’t have a voice” to say something, “because I’m a nice Christian, Southern girl,” Kindred ended up being in unsavory situations (she didn't explicitly say what those situations were, but it's easy enough to piece together). She doesn’t want her daughter to have the same issues.


@yourejustliz #stitch with @Liz Kindred ♬ Succession (Theme Song) - The Theme System

“Nice is different than kind. The kind thing to do is to teach our daughters and our children in this next generation that when you are uncomfortable with something you listen to your body and you set a firm boundary with that and you provide language around that. And you start that really really young.”

Yep. Well said.


This article originally appeared on 8.8.24

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Democracy

Upset that a friend voted differently than you? Expert shares how to heal and reconnect.

Ignoring people won't solve the problem.

via Canva/Photos

Americans voting in the 2024 election

The 2024 election was an emotional rollercoaster for millions of Americans. Those who voted for Trump have reason to celebrate, while those who supported Harris or a third-party candidate are probably deflated and need a while to recover emotionally.

The election was notable because there was a significant shift in voters from the Democratic to the Republican ticket over the 2020 election. So many people may now find themselves on opposite ends of the aisle with friends or loved ones with whom they previously agreed.

A lot of folks have to deal with the fact that their friends or family members voted differently than them, and, honestly, it can sting a bit, especially when hot-button issues are on the table, such as women’s rights, immigration, the economy, health care, LGBTQ rights and more.

2024 election, mental health, trump, harrisA woman displaying her "I voted" stickervia Flickr/Bethraebel

Regardless of who you voted for, you may feel a twinge of animosity toward a loved one who chose someone different and may not be sure how to get over your feelings. Upworthy spoke with Jessica McCarthy, Psy.D., a clinical neuropsychologist, clinical psychologist and certified school psychologist, to help our readers repair their relationships after the election.

McCarthy is also the Founder and Clinical Director of Elements Psychological Services.

“What’s interesting is that regardless of the political spectrum, people’s emotions are the same—frustrated, angry, passionate, betrayed, dismayed, scared, hopeful, determined, bewildered,” McCarthy told Upworthy. “People’s personal values and viewpoints are something that they hold near and dear to them—and if it’s a deal-breaker issue, the reactions are more extreme in scale if the opposing view is from a loved one.”

In the aftermath of the election, you may want to distance yourself from the people who voted differently than you, and McCarthy believes that’s acceptable. However, it would be best to communicate how you’re feeling, instead of mysteriously dropping out of their lives without notice.

“Sometimes, people need space to sit and process—this, again, can be done through communicating about readiness and willingness to connect,” McCarthy told Upworthy. “Space and silence should never be weaponized in a relationship, but that need for space can also be honored in a way through effective communication about limits and when both parties can reconvene and communicate.”

2024 election, mental health, trump, harrisA man displaying her "I voted" sticker.via Jimmy Zo/Flickr

Instead of disappearing from your friends’ lives altogether, text them, saying, “I need time to sort through my emotions after the election. I'm looking forward to talking with you when I am ready.”

McCarthy says that maintaining relationships with people you disagree with can be challenging because people need to have their viewpoints heard. It can be stifling for people to feel forced to keep their mouths shut around loved ones.

However, some relationships can thrive when firm rules of engagement are in place. For example, you and your friend can agree that you shouldn’t talk about politics to preserve the relationship.

“I have plenty of patients in my practice who have friends who have differing stances in the aforementioned areas, and the health of the relationship is determined by the ‘rules of engagement’—either directly or indirectly agreed upon rules that serve as guidelines for how to navigate these topics (and often, it’s agreed upon not to discuss them),” McCarthy says. “These relationships work because there is tremendous value and enjoyment in other areas of the relationship from which both parties mutually benefit.”

There’s nothing wrong with feeling let down by a loved one who voted differently in the election. People’s political views are closely tied to their moral values, so it’s understandable to have big emotions over people you love making a different value judgment. The key to keeping the relationship going on a new, healthy path is to share how you feel, listen to your loved ones and agree on the best path forward. “Anytime there has been a rupture in a relationship, there needs to be communication as to how to proceed and what repair might look like,” McCarthy says.

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Health

After learning I’m an empath, life makes so much more sense. Are you one, too?

There’s solid science behind the psychology.

via Pixabay

The many faces of an empath.

A few years ago I had an office job where I sat in a row of cubicles with about a dozen other people. One morning when a coworker walked into the office to start his day, a feeling of dread bubbled up from my subconscious. He was angry and I wasn’t going to be able to escape his feelings.

His desk was about 10 feet from mine and like waves, I could feel his emotions seeping into my body. He wasn’t bothering anyone and was always pleasant to me, but I knew he was angry about something deep down, and I could feel it.

As far as I knew, no one else in the office was having the same experience that I was. I was the only person who found it emotionally exhausting to be in the same room as this person.

I wasn’t sure what to make of this bizarre, unintentional attachment to the emotional states of others until I was listening to a podcast featuring Dr. Drew Pinksy where he mentioned that he was “an emotional sponge” who sucks up other people’s emotions and referred to it as being an “empath.”

That powerful revelation struck me in two ways. I realized that I was probably an empath as well and that I experience emotions differently than others. "One of the hardest things about being an empath is learning not everyone is,” Hannah Ewens at Vice wrote.

PsychAlive describes being an empath as exhausting at times, but not without its benefits.

“Empaths are highly sensitive individuals, who have a keen ability to sense what people around them are thinking and feeling. … often to the point of taking on the pain of others at their own expense,” PsychAlive says.

“On the bright side, empaths tend to be excellent friends,” PsychAlive continues. “They are superb listeners. They consistently show up for friends in times of need. They are big-hearted and generous. Empaths also tend to be highly intuitive and emotionally intelligent.”

via Pexels

As I started to look into the idea that I may be an empath, I began to consider the emotional sway my wife has over me. If she is stressed or tired, it makes me uncomfortable because I cannot escape her emotional state. It’s not that she’s overly emotional, but that I lack the force field that shields me from people’s emotional states, especially people close to me.

That’s why I get a huge feeling of relief when my wife transitions from being in a negative mood to a positive one. But, on the other hand, she doesn’t seem to be swayed one way or the other by my emotional state. It’s not that she’s callous, it’s just that she has a healthy emotional distance from me.

The problem is that it's nearly impossible to explain what this feels like to someone who isn’t an empath, and attempting to do so makes me seem a little unstable. So I keep these disturbances to myself, which probably isn’t healthy.

Caroline Van Kimmenade, who runs courses for empaths who want to understand their power, explained what it’s like to be an empath. "It's like a football match where everyone gets hyped up and starts waving and then the mob things start sweeping you up, and you barely know you're doing it," she explained.

"We can all experience that, but it doesn't mean you're an empath. But for an empath, it's that multiplied and applied to everything all of the time. Empaths are constantly in a giant football stadium where they're reacting to bigger things going on from all directions,” said Van Kimmenade.

When I realized I was an empath it helped me make sense of a part of myself that always felt contradictory. I am a person who has no problem being alone for long periods of time, but I’m also totally comfortable in social situations.

Tod Perry's solitary workspace.

via Upworthy

I work for Upworthy as a writer and the host of its podcast, “Upworthy Weekly,” and do it all from home. Honestly, I love being alone all day because I have a lot more power over my own emotional state than when I'm in an office getting bombarded by other people’s “stuff.”

I also enjoy going to movies, concerts and bars alone, too.

On the other hand, I am an extrovert who’s very comfortable in social situations. Empaths can be very social people because they have the superpower of being attuned to others' emotions and they have a great intuition for other people. We are experts at reading the room and are great at relating to all sorts of people.

Dr. Judith Orloff, the author of “The Empath’s Survival Guide: Life Strategies for Sensitive People,” says that extroverted empaths “crave the dopamine rush from lively events. In fact, they can’t get enough of it.”

One of the strangest things about being an empath is having a heightened sense of smell. My sense of smell is so keen that I can’t wear cologne because I never go nose blind to the scent and it’ll bother me the whole night. The same goes for scented lotions. The interesting thing is that this isn’t just in my head; researchers have found that the part of the brain that recognizes emotions overlaps with the brain areas associated with smell.

So what causes someone to be an empath?

“It can be both nature and nurture. Some empaths are born empaths the minute they come out of the womb they are these sensitive creatures feeling the world with the palm of their hands,” Dr. Orloff told Upworthy.

Dr. Orloff says that research shows empaths have different brain chemistry.

“Research is suggesting that the mirror neuron system in the brain is on overdrive with empaths—meaning their compassion is hyperactive versus narcissists who have hypo-active mirror neurons and empathy deficient disorder,” Orloff said.

Orloff adds that even though men and women are both empaths, it can be harder for men to come to terms with their sensitivity. She runs an empath support community where men are much more reluctant to share.

“When the men do share, they express the shame about being sensitive, how it isn't masculine and how they were bullied as children and made to feel ashamed to be crybabies rather than beautiful sensitive beings,” Orloff told Upworthy.

I had never heard of the term empath until about five years ago, but after coming to the realization that I probably am one and learning about the positive and negative aspects of this psychological trait, I feel that I’ve become better at navigating my emotional life. I'm getting better at seeing the difference between my emotions and those of others and making sense of the difference.

On the positive side, I’ve developed greater trust in my own intuition knowing that, as an empath, when I get a sense about someone, I should go with it because there’s a good chance I’m right. I’ve also learned to be less judgmental of those around me who I think aren’t as sensitive as they should be. They’re just not experiencing life the same way.


This article originally appeared 2 years ago.

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Pop Culture

Super relatable 'SNL' skit about calling Dad is striking an emotional chord with viewers

People are calling it “oddly profound and sentimental.”

Saturday Night Live/Youtube

We've all had these types of conversations with our dad, apparently.

While Saturday Night Live is normally meant to produce laughs, every so often a sketch comes along that unexpectedly tugs on the heartstrings. “Calling Dad” is one of those sketches.

The scene, as part of the November 9, 2024 episode featuring comedian Bill Burr, shows two grown men (Andrew Dismukes and Devon Walker) attempting to call their fathers (Burr and Kenan Thompson) and establish an emotional connection. Unfortunately, they struggle to talk about "anything real.”

Thompson’s dad character can’t seem to delve into anything deeper than surface level sports chat—primarily how the Philadelphia Eagles were doing—while Burr barely gets out two sentences before saying “Well, I’ll let you go.”

Dismukes decides to call his dad back for another attempt, which doesn’t prove much better as Burr is solely focused on whether or not his son has had the oil changed in his car.

As the scene progresses, however, both sports and cars become metaphors for something else weighing on the dads’ minds. Thompson wistfully shares how, even though the Eagles have “been around for a while,” he was “starting to feel like maybe the Eagles don't got much time left.”

On a much more blunt note, Burr admits the real reason behind his oil change concerns, saying “my car just wants to be closer to your car because my car’s car died around the age your car is now.”

When Dismukes tries to suss out whether his dad is trying to share something a little more vulnerable than auto maintenance, Burr insists they’re only talking about cars…just before suggesting that their “cars” go to Ireland together to see where “our cars’ family is from.”

And the pièce de résistance: when Dismukes says “I love you” to dad, he is met with “Well, I’ll let you go.”

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Though the scene did have some funny moments, it clearly struck a deeper emotional chord with viewers who have clearly had these exact same types of conversations with their own fathers.

“This made me CRY. And then laugh. And then cry,” one person commented. “Make those calls. You truly will not know when they’re gone.”

“The older you get the more you will understand how real this is. Made me cry~my dad exactly!” another added.

One viewer called it “oddly profound and sentimental,” adding, “Didn’t think SNL had this kind of father/son messaging up their sleeve.”

Quite a few were compelled to revisit memories of their own late dads.

“My dad died last year. He was from Boston and when I called him he ALWAYS said ‘what's going on, buddy?’ And now I'm in tears,” said one person.

Another wrote, “My dad always asked if I've checked the oil lately and always told me to drive safe when I left my parents' house. ‘I love you’ is said in many ways. <3”

And of course, many were inspired to call their own dads immediately, even if they knew the conversation would be about the same old trivial subjects. Because maybe they're not so trivial after all. Maybe in a world where men being affectionate is still a somewhat novel concept, we cherish being told “I love you” in whatever way they can manage. After all, we won’t hear those messages forever.

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Health

Viral OCD checklist with 'improvements' is hilarious — but there's more to the story.

OCD is a lot more than just "wanting things neat." But the checklist is still funny.

zenxii_/Reddit

The Yale-Brown Obsessive Compulsive Scale

A user on Reddit recently posted an OCD symptom checklist given to them by a doctor. It's called the Yale-Brown Obsessive Compulsive Scale (Y-BOCS) and it includes dozens of symptoms and behaviors that can be associated with OCD. It's a helpful diagnostic tool that can help identify whether a person has OCD and how severe it might be.

However, after taking a closer look at the sheet, the OP just had to chuckle.

There's something deliciously ironic about the OCD checklist being absolutely riddled with spelling and formatting mistakes.

The original poster took it upon themselves to use their superpowers of neatness and exactitude to make a few... corrections.

"Behold the cruel checklist my doctor gave me to help identify my specific flavor of OCD. It had room for improvement," they wrote.

Note all the corrections made in red pen.

There are a lot of them!

zenxii_/Reddit

Of particular interest is the category called "Obsession with need for symmetry for exactness."

A section which, ironically, is not indented in the same way as the other category headings!

A few other errors on the sheet include:

  • Extra spaces between words
  • Poor line alignment
  • Missing and inconsistent punctuation
  • Inconsistent bolding and italicization
The document's formatting is so bad, you almost wonder if it was designed that way on purpose.

Users on Reddit got a lot of laughs out of the corrected checklist, to the tune of over 31,000 upvotes.

Of course, OCD is rarely about just "wanting things neat."

person washing hands in sink Photo by Curology on Unsplash

OCD has become a buzzword we throw around casually to describe anyone who is rigid in their thinking about certain things, or excessively tidy or clean.

("Sorry, I'm a little bit OCD about how I organize my desk.")

In reality, that's a stereotype that doesn't even begin to tell the whole story. "Exactness and symmetry" is just one of several categories on the Y-BOCS.

OCD is also characterized by these obsessions and compulsions becoming so intrusive they interfere with day to day life.

Other users in the thread chimed in with what OCD really looks like for them:

"I spent several years driving 10 minutes out of my way on a daily commute because I was afraid that if I drove over this specific bridge I was going to yeet myself off it. I had no intent to kill myself I was just terrified I was gonna do it," wrote one.

"I had an intrusive thought about stabbing the girl next to me in Spanish class with a pencil and I’m now I’m afraid to touch pencils so I can’t take notes," said another.

Another regularly worries about things like "staying awake all night because there might be a spider in my bedroom, and the spider will have babies on its back, and the babies will hatch and crawl into my mouth while I'm sleeping, and I'll suffocate and die. And then I'll go to the hell I don't believe in, because I killed the spiders."

Needless to say, people with OCD often get annoyed by the "neatness" trope which oversimplifies their disease.

However, the original poster took the criticism in stride. They're early on in their own diagnosis and discovery phase and just wanted to have a laugh to lighten the mood.

"I’m still new to my diagnosis and self-discovery within the lens of having OCD, so stepping on others’ toes or downplaying the condition was not intentional," the poster wrote. "My own OCD is not as simple as my edited page would suggest, I just posted this rather tongue-in-cheek. This page caused me some mild distress, but I also thought it hilarious that a checklist for OCD would be so rife with errors."

"My own condition is debilitating on a daily basis and doesn’t even encompass what the form made it look to be, but I didn’t quite feel the need to explain my medical journey."

It's important to have a sense of humor when things get tough. Gallows humor is the idea of using laughter to protect yourself from the stress and anxiety of a scary of even life-threatening situation. It's not everyone's style, but it's a legitimately effective coping mechanism.

As long as we can all agree that, yes, OCD is a lot more than just getting aggravated by typos — it's OK to chuckle at the sloppy medical form and OP's hilarious mark-ups. In fact, if we look past the corrections and actually read the form, we'll come away knowing way more about OCD than we did before!

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