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‘I am tired of feeling helpless’: Gen X mom admits her kids have it harder than she did

Hard work doesn’t solve everything anymore.

american dream, jessica mccabe, gen x mom
via that1crazy72/TikTok

Jessica McCabe explains why her 20-something kids have it so much harder than she did.

Historically, there’s always been a battle between older and younger generations. Invariably, the older generation will always say that the younger kids are lazier or softer than they were growing up. We’ve seen this over the past few years with baby boomers accusing millennials of being entitled and oversensitive.

But Jessica McCabe, 51, who is retired from the Air Force, is bucking the historical trend by pointing out that the game has changed since she was in her 20s. In a passionate rant, she says it’s much harder for her 25- and 28-year-old kids to get by.

The video has obviously struck a chord on TikTok, where it’s received over 11.5 million views and 68,000 comments. Her primary complaint is how costly it is for her hard-working kids to afford housing.

"I am so tired of feeling helpless as a parent,” McCabe says in the video. “Yes, my kids are grown adults. My oldest is 28. My youngest is 25. And I thought by teaching them what I learned, which is you work hard, you get a good job, you're gonna get the things in life that you need, right? Worked for me. Why wouldn't it work for them? Because it doesn't, because the world has f**king changed."

Warning:Video contains strong language.

@that1crazy72

Its no wonder there is a mental health crisis amoung the younger generation..and to make matters worse most cant afford to get treated and if they do they are told to “get a better job” what happened to the middle class just wanting to make w decent living? #housingcrisis #mentalhealth #americandream #rent #longervideos #howtoretire

McCabe makes a compelling point that things have changed over the past few decades and that it’s unfair for older people to judge younger people on the same terms.

"I see them struggling, and before my generation comes at me, yes, I understand struggling as a part of life. We all struggle, but there's a difference between struggling and drowning. So we struggled, and it was tough. But you know what? We made it. We knew there was a light at the end of the tunnel with our struggle. It seems like kids today, no matter how much they struggle, they just get further and further down."

Even when McCabe's kids do the right thing, it’s still not enough to get by. Even though her son has a college degree, he still had to move back into her home.

"I told my son, all you have to do is work hard, go to college, or join the military like I did. He went to college, got his degree, got a full-time job,” McCabe said. “It's been 10 months. He has saved almost every dime and still can't afford to live. Why are one-bedroom studio apartments almost $2,000 a month. Why?"

Her daughter had a similar problem buying a house.

"She wanted to buy her own house. My daughter worked six days a week, 12 hours a day to save up enough for this down payment and finally got this house. She's paying double what I'm paying for my mortgage, but her loan was the same amount,” she said.

The mother’s complaints drew much support on TikTok, where other people deal with the same issues.

"Thank you for seeing the reality of this. So many parents/grandparents don’t understand this struggle," Don't Mess With Mamma Taylor wrote.

"This is why my 27 yr old still lives with me. Neither one of us can afford to be on our own," Crissi Smith added.

"Nothing that worked for me as a Gen X works for my kids. The rules are stacked against them," RHO wrote.

For those who have a hard time understanding the younger generations' housing struggles, the numbers don’t lie. Over the past 20 years, the average U.S. home price has risen from about $140,000 to $340,000 as of April 2023.

Things aren’t much better for renters.

For the past 20 years, Moody’s has been tracking the rent-burdon threshold that measures the percentage of one’s income paid on rent. In 2023, for the first time since monitoring the metric, the typical American renter now spends over 30% of their income on rent.

“If we’re looking at the low- to moderate-income families, they are taking 40 percent and above all of their income on the rent, even if the metro [area] itself hasn’t crossed that 30 percent line yet,” said Moody’s Analytics senior economist Lu Chen told The Hill.







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Joy

5 things that made us smile this week

More smiles, more (happy) tears.

This week's happy things include saving the environment, sibling love, and the most incredible birdcalls you've ever heard.

True

Wanna know what we’re thankful for this week? The Internet. It truly is a gift that keeps on giving us the best of humanity every single week—and Thanksgiving week is no exception. Check out these five things we’ve found that are guaranteed to make you smile (and maybe even shed a few happy tears).

Enjoy—and don't forget to share the love!

1. This kid's incredible knack for birdcall

@diabetic4one This is Samuel’s bird call performance at his schools talent show. He loved every minute of this #autism #birder #fypage #talent #agt ♬ original sound - lori

We dare you to find a better impressionist than ten-year-old Samuel Henderson, this ten year old student from Oklahoma City. Samuel, who has autism, has mastered over 50 different bird calls and performed several of them at his school’s talent show recently. These calls were so accurate that scientists at the Cornell Lab of Ornithology reached out to Samuel and invited him to their lab to study birds. We couldn't be happier for him. (Also the way he throws these birds over his shoulder when he’s done with them—perfection.)

2. Protecting America's most treasured places.

Subaru Share the Love Event and National Park Foundation

Good news for national parks! As the largest corporate donor to the National Park Foundation, Subaru has protected over 400 national parks throughout the Subaru Share the Love Event. What’s more, Subaru and its retailers will donate a minimum of $300 to charities like the National Park Foundation, helping preserve and protect the national parks for future generations.

3. This adorable brother-sister dance.

When six-year-old Harper couldn’t find a partner for her dance studio’s annual summer showcase, her 14-year-old brother Micah stepped in to save the day. The two performed an adorable “Barbie and Ken” themed routine, complete with an adorable fist bump and a lift. What a gentleman.

4. A high school football team cheers on the band kids.

Cue the happy tears: A group of football players at American Fork High School in Utah showed up to cheer on the band kids at a recent competition. Their coach, Aaron Behm, encouraged his team to start showing up to support after noticing a divide between the football players and the marching band. In an interview with Today.com, Behm said, “They come and play at our games and provide an awesome environment, and they deserve our support.” Now that’s sportsmanship.

5. This heartfelt exchange between neighbors

This neighborly exchange captured on camera doorbell footage is the perfect antidote for everyone who’s been feeling like the country is seriously divided lately. On her way to a Muslim funeral, one neighbor stopped by her Muslim neighbor’s house for advice on what to wear. Not only does the Muslim neighbor give her a demonstration on how to wrap her headscarf in real time, the neighbor lets the woman keep the item. Beautiful.

For more reasons to smile, check out all the ways Subaru is sharing the love this holiday season, here.

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People born before 1990 are sharing their now-useless but 100 percent nostalgic skills

For instance, recording songs on tape from the radio while yelling at the DJ to shut up during the intro.

Canva, Veronica Lorine on Unsplash, Julentto Photography on Unsplash

From holding the phone on your shoulder to folding a map to knowing what "cornflower" and "goldenrod" are, here are pre-Y2K skills at their finest.

Hey there, millennials! Welcome to the "Holy crapoly, I have real-life memories from 20 years ago!" club. It's a strangely disorienting milestone to reach when you find yourself starting sentences with "When I was young…" or "Back in my day…" isn't it? Your Gen X elders have been here for a while, but even we have moments of incredulously calculating how the heck we've arrived at this place. Time is a tricky little jokester, isn't he?

To highlight how much has changed for middle-aged folks since we were young, a user on Reddit asked people born before 1990 what useless skills they possess that nobody has a need for anymore. It's both a hilarious trip down memory lane and a time capsule of life pre-Y2K. (Do kids these days even know what Y2K was? Gracious.)

If you're down for some good-old-days nostalgia, check out people's responses:

Ask Reddit Question: People born before 1990, what trivial skill do you possess that no one uses anymore?

Making brown paper bag book covers

"I can cover a textbook with a brown paper bag." — sourwaterbug

Oh goodness yes. And there was always that one girl in class who had the art of the brown paper bag book cover perfected. (They're probably Pinterest influencers now.)

Folding a map—and knowing where to find a map

"I can re-fold a map correctly." —JungleZac

"Man remember actually using maps…I had an atlas with the road system in my car to navigate other states during road trips. Crazy." – jagua_haku

How did we ever figure out how to get anywhere before GPS and Google Maps? (Two-inch thick road atlases in our car and stopping at gas stations to buy local maps while traveling, that's how. Positively primitive.)

Memorizing phone numbers and answering the house phone

For real, though, kids these days don't even know.

"Remembering phone numbers." — greatmilliondog

"Not only that, having to speak to your friend's parents for a few minutes when you call their house." — Logical_Area_5552

"How to take a message when the person they want to talk to isn't there." — Amoori_A_Splooge

How about dialing on a rotary phone, using a pay phone and making (or taking) a collect call?

The skillful phone shoulder hold

"Using your shoulder to hold a telephone up to your ear while doing multiple other things at once. Now, the phones are so damned small I drop them." – Regular_Sample_5197

"100 ft phone cords 🤣" – mrch1ck3nn

"I got in sooooo much trouble for stretching the phone cord into the bathroom for some privacy. Accidentally clotheslined Grandma 😬 She laughed about it but Mom was pissed!" – AffectionateBite3827

Knowing the exact name of every Crayola color because we only had so many

"I know what the color “goldenrod” is." — ImAmazedBaybee

"That and burnt sienna were the crayolas of choice." — Signiference

"Cornflower would like a word." — cps12345

The art of the mixed tape—especially from the radio

I don't think kids these days fully grasp how revolutionary Spotify and the like are for those of us who spent hours in front of the radio with our cassette tape recorder queued up at just the right spot waiting for the song we wanted to record to come one. And they will never, ever know the frustration of the DJ yapping right up until the lyrics start.

"Record to tape from the radio. Trying to make sure to not get the DJ/presenter talking sh-t or an ad" – Gankstajam

"'Shut up, shut up, shut up!!! I'm trying to record my song!!!'" – tearsonurcheek

"Haha yeah and trying to tell others so they don't make random noise or knock on the door.

How about making cassette-based mix tapes, trying to figure out to the second, how many and which types of songs in which order, that would still fit perfectly on the length of tape per side.

People who make digital recordings do not have to worry about 'running out of tape.'

Having the first side be tempting enough that they'd flip the other side to continue listening. That's before continual playback machines existed. Had to flip the cassette." – CrunchyTeaTime

And there were many more, from rewinding a cassette tape with a pencil to writing in cursive to tearing the sides off of printer paper without tearing the paper itself. (Oh and of course the ability to count out change and understand what you're supposed to do if something costs $9.91 and someone hands you $10.01.)

Gotta love it when the things that used to be totally normal now sound like historic artifacts found in a museum. Kind of makes you wonder what normal things from today we'll be laughing about in another 20 or 30 years.


This article originally appeared last year.

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Millennial shares 'proof' they've set the new standard for what it looks like to age

Gen Z may have to concede to this point.

Photo credit: Canva

Millennial shares 'proof' they're not aging as quickly as Gen Z

Millennials and Gen Z truly have a sibling kind of relationship. They take turns teasing each other but in the end it's nothing but love between the two generations. In recent months people were taunting Gen Z about their looks saying that they age like milk and several from that generation agreed that people often mistake them for much older than they are.

Well, it seems Gen Z is back with their own commentary about how poorly Millennials age but instead of the older sibling in this rivalry conceding to the point, they dispute it...with receipts. Ouch, this one probably stings a bit. Chris Bautista uploaded a video response to TikTok addressing the young whippersnappers telling Millennials they look old to explain why they feel that way.

The answer is quite simple. Millennials set the bar for what aging looks like for people approaching middle age according to Bautista.

"I'm gonna say this a little bit louder for the Gen Zers in the back that didn't hear me the last time. Millennials look fantastic for our age and you cannot tell us otherwise," Bautista starts. "The reason why you think we don't look great for our ages is because we have set the new standard of what it looks like to age."

Then he pulls out receipts. Pictures of celebrities who were the age Millennials are right now when the pictures were taken. Yikes! Most Millennials look no where near the age of the people in the pictures, but maybe the camera added 10 years?

Watch the video:

@bautistud This needs to be said for millenials 🫡 #millennialsoftiktok #genzvsmillenial #aging ♬ original sound - Chris Bautista

"It's cause all millennials used the St. Ives peach scrub exfoliating wash and we achieved eternal youth," someone surmises.

"It's gotta be the Flintstone vitamins," another guesses.

"I don't know, I am 40 and got stopped at my son's high school security guard because he thought I was a student. No one ever believes my age," one person writes.

"But seriously like what's the reason? Cause this life has been stressful," someone else asks.

So is Gen Z really aging poorly or did Millennials get some weird radioactive Flintstone vitamins laced with asbestos that is causing their cells to age slower? The world may never know but hopefully these two generations forever keep the sibling banter alive.


This article originally appeared in June.

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Gen X mom can’t understand why her Millenial and Gen Z kids watch TV with closed captions

She came around after she heard their reasoning.

via GibsonIsHere/TikTok and Andrea Piacquadio/Pexels

The generational caption debate is a big deal.

If you’re a Gen Xer or older, one surprising habit the younger generations developed is their love of subtitles or closed-captioning while watching TV. To older generations, closed-captioning was only for grandparents, the hearing impaired, or when watching the news in a restaurant or gym.

But these days, studies show that Millenials and Gen Z are big fans of captions and regularly turn them on when watching their favorite streaming platforms. A recent study found that more than half of Gen Z and Millenials prefer captions on when watching television. It’s believed that their preference for subtitles stems from the ubiquity of captioning on social media sites such as TikTok or Instagram.

This generational change perplexed TikTokker, teacher and Gen X mother, Kelly Gibson.

Always leaning! #genx #millennial #caption #learning

@gibsonishere

Always leaning! #genx #millennial #caption #learning

"I have three daughters, and they were here. Two of them are young millennials; the other one is an older Gen Z," Gibson explained in a video with over 400,000 views. "All of them were like, 'Why don't you have the captions on?'”

The mother couldn’t believe that her young kids preferred to watch TV like her grandparents. It just did not compute.

"My Gen X butt was shocked to find out that these young people have decided it's absolutely OK to watch movies with the captions going the whole time," she said jokingly.

But like a good mother, Gibson asked her girls why they preferred to watch TV with captioning, and their reason was straightforward. With subtitles, it’s easier not to lose track of the dialog if people in the room start talking.

"They get more out of it," Gibson explained. "If somebody talks to them in the middle of the show, they can still read and get what's going on even if they can't hear clearly. Why are young people so much smarter than us?"

At the end of the video, Gibson asked her followers whether they watch TV with subtitles on or off. "How many of you out there that are Millennials actually do this? And how many of you Gen Xers are so excited that this is potentially an option?" she asked.

Gibson received over 8,400 responses to her question, and people have a lot of different reasons for preferring to watch TV with captions.

“Millennial here. I have ADHD along with the occasional audio processing issues. I love captions. Also, sometimes I like crunchy movie snacks,” Jessileemorgan wrote. “We use the captions because I (GenX) hate the inability of the movie makers to keep sound consistent. Ex: explosions too loud conversation to quiet,” Lara Lytle added.

“My kids do this and since we can’t figure out how to turn it off when they leave, it’s become a staple. GenX here!” Kelly Piller wrote.

The interesting takeaway from the debate is that anti-caption people often believe that having writing on the screen distracts them from the movie. They’re too busy reading the bottom of the screen to feel the film's emotional impact or enjoy the acting and cinematography. However, those who are pro-caption say that it makes the film easier to understand and helps them stay involved with the film when there are distractions.

So who’s right? The person holding the remote.


This article originally appeared in January.

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3-month-old baby shocks mom and sister by repeating full sentences. It may have a name.

"He is a baby genius start showing him math problems."

Photo credit: Canva

3-month-old baby repeats full sentences shocking mom

Babies can't talk. This isn't something that needs to be studied and researched, it's a pretty common fact that humans have. The reasons babies cry is because they can't talk to tell us what they need, at least that's what the general understanding has been for centuries. But what if some babies could talk and we simply haven't been exposed to them because the world is so big?

Thanks to social media, the world has gotten a whole lot smaller when it comes to being able to take a peek into other people's lives. This means we get to be exposed to things that may otherwise gone unseen. Mekeia, a mom of two recently uploaded a video of her 3-month-old son talking. Not the cute baby babble that we like to call talking, but repeating actual short sentences.

Mekeia was recording her daughter playing with the baby when they captured the moment on video.

The little girl holds the baby's face and says, "say I am two months," before Mekeia corrects her, "say I am three months," the little girl pipes back up. Clearly the baby was trying to join in the conversation with what was expected to be baby babble when the mom instructed the older child to let the baby have a chance to "talk." It was then that the baby shocked everyone by sounding like he repeated the same phrase.

The two are visibly and audibly shocked not wanting to believe the baby actually repeats what the other child says. Mekeia is on the phone with a friend when the entire thing happens. Presumably thinking this is a fluke, the mom attempts to put the phone up to the baby's mouth. When he just babbles, she tells the baby, "say hey Bam." Nothing. Just more babble and drool.

Just when you think your ears were playing tricks on you, the baby does it again when the mom tells him to say, "hey Quintin." Clearly the baby still sounds like a baby but you can clearly hear him repeating the sound and cadence of the words so much so that it sounds like he's fully saying the words. His older sister is overwhelmed with emotion and begins to cry while Mekeia seems to be so shocked that she begins to laugh while the person on the phone is just stunned into confusion.

@foxondemand

Watch until the end 😱omg🥹🥰!!

♬ original sound - Mekeia 💖


People in the comments were eager to jump in with exclaiming the baby is a genius with one person writing, "he is a baby genius start showing him math problems."

Another person jokes, "next thing he's writing emails and making appointments."

"Talking so clear would scare me sooo bad he's so intelligent," someone writes.

Others explain the phenomenon with a condition called echolalia. "Echolalia is a normal part of child development. As children learn to talk and understand words, they imitate, copy or echo the sounds and words they hear. Over time, a child usually learns to talk by connecting new words together to make unique little phrases or sentences,” according to Speech and Language Advisor Claire Smith when interviewed by the BBC.

While echolalia can be a sign of autism, that's not always the case. Many kids grow out of it by the age of three and continue their typical development.


This article originally appeared in August.

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Democracy

Man figured out how to beat squatters at their own game. Now he helps others do it.

"If they can take a house, I can take a house."

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio/Pexels

When people move in and refuse to move out, what do you do?


Squatters' rights laws are some of the most bizarrely misused legal realities we have, and something no one seems to have a good answer for. Most of us have heard stories of someone moving into a vacant home and just living there, without anyone's permission and without paying rent, and somehow this is a legal question mark until the courts sort it out.

According to The National Desk, squatters' rights are a carryover from British property law and were created to ensure that abandoned property could be used and to protect occupants from being kicked out without proper notice. It should go without saying that squatter law isn't meant to allow someone to just take over someone else's property, but sometimes that's exactly what happens.

It's what happend to Flash Shelton's mother when she put her house up for rent after her husband passed away. A woman contacted her with interest in the property, only she wanted to do repairs and look after the home instead of paying rent. Before anyone knew it, she had furniture delivered (which she later said was accidental) and set up camp, despite Shelton's mom not agreeing to the arrangement.

But since the woman had expressed her intention and already moved in, the matter was out of police hands, as Shelton found out when he tried to contact the local sheriff.

“They said, ‘I’m sorry but we can’t enter the house, and it looks like they’re living there, so you need to go through the courts',” he shared in a YouTube video.

Shelton rightfully didn't want the expense of a court battle, so he took matters into his own hands—not with violence, but with logic. He had his mom lease the home to him, and then told the squatter that she had to move everything out because he was moving things in.

“If they can take a house, I can take a house," he said.

He was calm and clear about her having to get everything out within the day or he would have people come and take it, and thankfully, she didn't put up a big fight.

That experience made him realize how squatter law can be abused, but that there's a faster system for removing a squatter than to go through the court system. If a squatter can move in and force a homeowner to take them to court to prove they are living there illegally, then he could simply move in alongside the squatter, putting the squatter in the position of having to take the homeowner to court instead.

"The legal process is so slow, and at some point when they're in there, you're going to feel like they have more rights than you do and that's how you're going to be treated. So even though you it's your house and you're paying the mortgage or whatever, at some point squatters feel like they have more rights than you, so they don't have an incentive to leave until a judge tells them to, until they're actually ordered to, and that could take months."

After successfully removing the squatters in his mother's house, Shelton has been tackling similar squatter situations for other homeowners in California, earning him the nickname "The Squatter Hunter."

"All I'm doing is becoming a squatter and flipping this process on them," Shelton told CBS News. "I figured if they could take a house, I could take a house."

According to CBS, he's successfully removed a dozen squatters in the past year. ""I'm not going in and I'm not hurting anyone," he said. "I'm not kicking them out, I'm not throwing them out." He's literally just moving in himself, setting up cameras, and then creating small annoyances until the squatters get fed up enough to move out.

California isn't the only state that has seen issues with squatters. There are squatter stories from all over the U.S. of people moving into a property and refusing to leave without a court order, tying owners up in lengthy, expensive legal battles.

Shelton even has a Change.org petition to try to get squatter laws changed to "make squatting in residential maintained homes criminal." Making squatting illegal "will shift the burden of proof onto the squatter and make the crime punishable with restitution an option for damages," the the petition states.

Watch Shelton share his personal story:

This article originally appeared in April.

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