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Someone asked what women would dislike most if they became men. The answers are eye-opening.

Men shared a lot of feelings we don't often hear expressed.

man sitting looking contemplative

A lot of men struggle more than we know.

For decades, women's liberation, Me Too and other movements have shed light on the reality of being a woman in a patriarchal society. As a result, we've all gained a better understanding of how women are impacted by sexism and have slowly but surely re-examined social norms that have negatively affected women throughout history.

What's often been overlooked, though, is how patriarchal norms negatively affect men as well. We know that men have been discouraged by society from sharing their feelings, but the notion that men don't open up because it's "unmanly" is also an oversimplification. Sure, there are men who don't know how to express their feelings, but there are also conscientious, emotionally available men who don't talk about the hard parts of being a man out loud because they don't want to overshadow women's concerns with their own. It's ironic that a sensitivity to women can get in the way of openly sharing the reality of being a man, but here we are.

A question posed on Reddit provided an invitation for men to open up with its unique framing: "What would women dislike most if they became men?" and men took the opportunity to share things that women might not realize they struggle with.


While there may be a temptation to compare these things to what women deal with, listening with compassion and an open mind goes a long way toward building understanding and empathy. Considering the fact that suicide rates among men are four times higher than women, we need more understanding because clearly a lot of men are struggling.

Here are some of the things men shared:

Trying to convince people you're not scary or creepy

Women are generally viewed as safe, while men are seen as potential threats. There are understandable reasons for that, but women may not realize how exhausting it is to try to navigate that as a man who genuinely isn't a threat. It hurts to know that people are automatically afraid of you.

"People being afraid of you for nothing you have done."

"Constantly worrying about not looking like a creep. Seriously, shit is exhausting. I’m a 5ft 10 inches, 225lbs, muscular black dude. I know damn well that that I’m probably the last person a woman(or anyone for that matter) wants to see walking behind them while they are alone at night.

I work in retail too so there’s times where I will walk around the store just to avoid walking behind women just to make them feel better.

Just to be clear, I’m not saying that women aren’t justified for being wary. I completely understand why they might feel that way but it just sucks constantly trying to make sure I don’t accidentally look like a creep."

man walking alone behind a busMen are automatically seen as a potential threat.Photo credit: Canva

"I’m 6’1, 265 lbs, brown, bald. No one has sat next to me on a bus in years. A child refused to sit next to me on a flight once and threw a tantrum about it. I ignored her the entire time. But oof that hurt. I cried watching Coco."

"Dude as a 6'2 fat dude with a beard I feel like being perceived as a creep is responsible for like 80% of my social anxiety, like I can't casually physically interact with anyone cause I'm scared of being called a creep."

"I’ll never forget the feeling of a loss of innocence when I was around 17yo and a woman grabbed her kid as I was walking towards my car (it looked like I was walking towards the kid who was in the general trajectory in the parking lot) and it dawned on me 'oh, I’m no longer seen as a child, I’m a potential threat now.' It was such a weird feeling."

Being viewed with suspicion around children

Women can say they love kids and show affection toward them without much of an eyebrow raise. But men who love children in pure and wholesome ways can't express that without people assuming or fearing they're a pedophile.

"People thinking you're a pedo when you're watching your own kid at the park."

"Being viewed with suspicion whenever I interact with children. Plenty of shitty things about being female, but that one is particularly sad for men."

"It's really sad, because children have this reckless abandon that is fun to watch. Running around and playing with no greater purpose in mind, just enjoying being alive without thinking about what's above and below.

I can't go to public parks without being looked at like I'm a predator, much less go anywhere where children are playing without the exact same vitriol but on steroids. Children are fun to watch, and I'm not there watching for some sick sexual thrill or to hurt anyone, I just like to be reminded that I once WAS one of those children not so long ago."

man playing with two small childrenDad playing with kidsPhoto credit: Canva

Being seen as the lesser parent

Much has been made of women often being the "default parent" who shoulders most of the mental burden of parenting. But a lot of that is social expectation, and even men who try to take on an equal share of parenting duties find that they're fighting an uphill battle to be treated as an equal parent.

"Being treated like a second rate parent even if you're the only parent."

"While signing up for a daycare I told them to call me first if our kids got sick. They said “weeee usuallyyyyyyy caaaaaaalll the mooommm fiiiiiirst…??” With a confirming look towards my wife.

I told them I wfh 5 minutes away and my wife is a teacher so if they want to waste their time calling my wife first go ahead but I’ll be (and am) usually the one to pick them up.

They still call my wife first."

"I was a stay at home dad. I told the teachers that when I met them at the beginning of the year. I was listed first in primary contacts. The number of times the school called my wife at work and then she called me so I could go pick up a sick kid was too high."

"ThEy LeTtInG yOu BaBySiT?"

"Whenever my wife is without our kid they're always asking who is watching him. Like I am. His father. He's not being babysat, he's not being watched, he's just at home with me. Foreign concept to so many people."

Alternatively, being seen as a hero for doing basic parenting things

On the flip side, a lot of men shared their bafflement at being venerated for doing very basic parenting things. While this may not seem like something to complain about, it's a bit infantilizing if you think about it.

"Sometimes I'm just chilling with my kids at the park and get told I'm the best dad ever. Like I'm doing the bare minimum right now ma'am. This is the floor of what I should be praised for, not the ceiling."

dad with baby in baby carrier at grocery storeDads go grocery shopping with kids, too.Photo credit: Canva

"When my sister had her kids her ex husband used to occasionally take his baby to work at the community college in a sling and lecture with the baby. He became totally famous on campus as the best dad ever and he was shared viral on local social media as being totally adorable Meanwhile she was just a mom with a baby, completely unremarkable. No praise, just general annoyance from strangers that she even had her baby out in public."

"I noticed this when I had custody of the kids after we separated. I was a freaking hero for attempting what millions of single moms have been doing forever. And it was in the eyes of women ( most men didn't care or notice) that my status was elevated while many of them were looking down their noses at the single mom's. Double standard for sure."

"Yeah I was going to say.. in the experience of me and one of my close friends, as a guy, the bar for being considered a great parent is disturbingly low."

The expectation to be an actual hero—and being seen as expendable

"Women and children first" has been a standard of emergency response forever, which isn't inherently bad but does send a message about the expendability of men. Imagine being told that your life is less valuable as a rule.

"If danger comes knocking, you have to answer the door while everyone else runs for the hills."

"I love how people are only outraged if women and children die. Like every dude aint also someone's son."

"Yup. If I’m a man dying, who cares. If I want a shred of sympathy, I have to describe myself as a husband, a father, or a provider."

"People see men as expendable."

"Off to the front lines you go."

"I learned from a thread a few weeks ago that women have no concept of this whatsoever. It hasn't even occurred to them that they could be considered more expendable than another person by default and they're offended that it would even be a possibility."

Men's lives are seen as expendable in some ways.Photo credit: Canva

A lack of compliments

Of course, there are women who don't feel like they get many compliments as well, but it appears to be a particular issue with men. Perhaps women compliment each other more, and men don't. Or perhaps it's that men misinterpret compliments as flirting too often, so women don't offer them to men as much.

"You may go a year or ten without a single compliment. Many men are laying in their casket before many good things are ever said about them."

"I had a woman complement my parallel parking skills 30 years ago, I can tell you when and where."

"So true, lmao. The last "real" compliment I got was 3 years ago (lmao) that too from my dad's (male) boss who said I've an amazing smile.

Well, unless my mom counts? I'm the most eligible bachelor in India as far as she's concerned. 😂"

"The whole thing is an ugly catch 22. Men think compliments are flirting because they don't get enough compliments, but women avoid complimenting them because they don't want them to think it's flirting."

The genuinely confusing messages about showing emotion

The common refrain is that men should show their emotions more and that women will respond positively to that. But in reality, many women have been as conditioned as men to view male emotion as weakness, and some respond accordingly.

"Crying in front of people has the exact opposite effect."

"'why don't you open up emotionally?'

Opens up emotionally

'I can't explain it, but I'm just, not attracted to you anymore.'"

"This one is real tho. You get shunned for not opening up, and you get shunned for opening up."

"I joined a support group for victims of something I'm not going to get into, but the amount of guys who had their wives/girlfriends abandon them or cheat on them almost immediately after a traumatic experience like a parent dying or being the victim of a violent crime was staggering. As soon as they showed emotion, 'weakness' and needing support themselves, it was all over for the relationship."

Many men feel like they can't show emotion even when they want to.Photo credit: Canva

"Yup. When I got the call that my dad's cancer had spread to his brain and was terminal, I was at work and started to cry. It wasn't a sob or ugly cry at all and I was trying to keep it together. Once my coworkers in the office noticed, they just quietly got up and walked into another room without saying anything. I tried to focus on my work and pull it together, but after about 3 minutes I was literally alone in the room. It was an open concept kind of office and there were about 15-18 desks in the room. Nobody said anything. Nobody asked if I was ok. They just got up a left.

About 15 minutes later the office manager asked if I needed to leave for the day because I was making other people uncomfortable. I heard at least one group of people joking about it on my way out.

I ended up quitting a couple of months later because everybody treated me completely different afterwards. I went from being the funny guy at work to the weird guy who cried at work."

There were some other things men shared that are worth taking a look at, but the bottom line is that there's genuine value in putting ourselves in other people's shoes. Just as women want men to understand what we deal with on a daily basis, men also have experiences and feelings that go unrecognized and unacknowledged. We all have a lot to learn and unlearn as we make our way toward gender equality, and truly understanding one another's realities is a vital step in that direction.


Former medic and single mom Leah Moore and her children being honored during the 2024 Keys to Progress event.

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In 2023, Leah Moore was struggling. A single mom and former medic in the Texas Air National Guard, Leah had no family support where she lived in Seattle, WA, which made raising her two girls and working full-time a significant challenge. When her only car broke down, Leah found herself struggling more than ever.

But in 2024, Leah’s burden became a little lighter. Moore is now one of many veterans that have been honored during this year’s Keys to Progress event, an annual giveaway that took place in over 60 cities across the country. Along with Moore, close to 100 other veterans and their families recieved the keys to free, reliable transportation as a thank you for their military service.

Providing reliable transportation to deserving veterans who’ve protected our country

According to the US Department of Transportation, approximately 40 percent of veterans live in rural areas where affordable transportation options are limited. Limited transportation can greatly affect a veteran’s quality of life, since reliable transportation is necessary for work, medical care, and other services.

Gail Nicholson, a veteran who served in the United States Army during the Persian Gulf Crisis from 1993 - 1997, knows this challenge personally. Gail relied on public transportation as she supported her family since the COVID-19 pandemic when her mother fell extremely ill. As a senior citizen, traveling by bus, with schedules and lines that are not always accessible, it has not always been easy.

With veterans like Gail Nicholson in mind, Progressive founded the Keys to Progress event in 2013, hoping to alleviate some of these common struggles that veterans face every day. Now, Gail will be able to care for her family and travel freely without the need for public transit.

Veteran Gail Nicholson at the 2024 Keys to Progress event.

How the dream of independence becomes a reality

There’s no doubt that access to a car can make anyone’s life easier—but it also comes with additional expenses that require additional financial commitment. To help with this, multiple organizations have come together with Progressive to make Keys to Progress possible.

First, local charities and Veracity Research Co. Investigations (VRC), a veteran-owned and operated company, help to identify deserving veterans in each region. Once the recipients are chosen, Insurance Auto Auctions, Inc. (IAA) provides a Powertrain 12-month protection plan for all donated vehicles, while 1-800-Charity Cars donates resources to help with vehicle titling and registration. Enterprise, a rental car company, pays for the insurance for each donated vehicle for the first six months, and Progressive writes the insurance policies funded by Enterprise. Finally, the gently used vehicles are donated through Charity Cars.

The result is a well-deserved gift that enables each veteran to get back on the road and move ahead in life as easily as possible.

Supporting veterans on the road and beyond

Sometimes too, a veteran needs an assist in getting their small business off and running as well. Through Keys to Progress, Progressive has also donated three tractor trailers to worthy recipients.

Lt. Colonel Rose a 30-year U.S. Marine Corps veteran, was the 2022 recipient of a commercial through the Keys to Progress program. He shared, “Since being selected as the 2022 Keys to Progress recipient, the vehicle has exceeded all expectations of being an owner operator. Myself, including so many others, have been blessed by this magnificent machine. This blessing has catapulted my business forward, the donation of operating costs has played a significant part in minor repair costs along with being able to forgo a truck payment.”

Lt. Colonel Rose has been able to grow his trucking business to a second truck and he is working to purchase a third due to the revenue made from being a Keys to Progress recipient. He has also taken his earnings to donate to various charities and is inspired by showing his appreciation and patriotism for the United States.

But Keys to Progress is truly a passion project, and one that has impacted many deserving veterans. Collectively, Progressive has been able to donate vehicles to more than 1,100 military families, in addition to gifting three fully-loaded commercial trucks to veteran truck drivers and 28 commercial vehicles to select veteran organizations.

Cars at Progressive's annual Keys to Progress event.

“Our Keys to Progress initiative is a wonderful example of Progressive's purpose to help people move forward and live fully," said Tricia Griffith, President and Chief Executive Officer of Progressive. "We're proud to be celebrating our 12th year of supporting veterans and will present almost 100 well-deserving veterans and their families with keys to a vehicle that will provide them reliable transportation to get on the road and move forward in life."

Whether it’s for veterans like Leah or Gail, Keys to Progress is continuing to showcase its commitment to driving progress on the road and providing transportation for veterans, military-related organizations, and veteran-owned small business owners across the country for years to come.

Whether it’s for veterans like Leah, Gail, or Lt. Colonel Rose, Keys to Progress is continuing to showcase its commitment to driving progress for veterans, military-related organizations, and veteran-owned small business owners across the country for years to come.

Robin Williams played inspiring English teacher John Keating in "Dead Poets Society."

As a Gen X parent of Gen Z teens and young adults, I'm used to cringing at things from 80s and 90s movies that haven't aged well. However, a beloved movie from my youth that I didn't expect to be problematic, "Dead Poets Society," sparked some unexpected negative responses in my kids, shining a spotlight on generational differences I didn't even know existed.

I probably watched "Dead Poets Society" a dozen or more times as a teen and young adult, always finding it aesthetically beautiful, tragically sad, and profoundly inspiring. That film was one of the reasons I decided to become an English teacher, inspired as I was by Robin Williams' portrayal of the passionately unconventional English teacher, John Keating.

The way Mr. Keating shared his love of beauty and poetry with a class of high school boys at a stuffy prep school, encouraging them to "seize the day" and "suck all the marrow out of life," hit me right in my idealistic youthful heart. And when those boys stood up on their desks for him at the end of the film, defying the headmaster who held their futures in his hands? What a moving moment of triumph and support.

My Gen Z kids, however, saw the ending differently. They loved the feel of the film, which I expected with its warm, cozy, comforting vibe (at least up until the last 20 minutes or so). They loved Mr. Keating, because how can you not? But when the movie ended, I was taken aback hearing "That was terrible!" and "Why would you traumatize me like that?" before they admitted, "But it was so gooood!"

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

The traumatize part I get—that film gets very heavy all of a sudden. But in discussing it further, I uncovered three main generational differences that impacted their "Dead Poets Society" viewing experience and what they took away from it.

1) Gen Z sees inspiring change through a systemic lens, not an individual one

The first thing my 20-year-old said when the credits rolled was, "What? That's terrible! Nothing changed! He got fired and the school is still run by a bunch of stodgy old white men forcing everyone to conform!" My immediate response was, "Yeah, but he changed those boys' individual lives, didn't he? He helped broaden their minds and see the world differently."

I realized that Gen X youth valued individuals going against the old, outdated system and doing their own thing, whereas Gen Z values the dismantling of the system itself. For Gen X, Mr. Keating and the boys taking a stand was inspiring, but the fact that it didn't actually change anything outside of their own individual experiences stuck like a needle in my Gen Z kids' craw.

2) Gen Z isn't accustomed to being blindsided by tragic storylines with no warning

To be fair, I did tell them there was "a sad part" before the movie started. But I'd forgotten how deeply devastating the last part of the movie was, so my daughter's "Why would you do that to me?!" was somewhat warranted. "I thought maybe a dog would die or something!" she said. No one really expected one of the main characters to die by suicide and the beloved teacher protagonist to be blamed for it, but I'd somehow minimized the tragedy of it all in my memory.

But also to be fair, Gen X never got any such warnings—we were just blindsided by tragic plot twists all the time. As kids, we cheered on Atreyu trying to save his horse from the swamp in "The Neverending Story" only to watch him drown. Adults showed us "Watership Down" thinking it would be a cute little animated film about bunnies. We were slapped in the face by the tragic child death in "My Girl," which was marketed as a sweet coming of age movie.

Gen Z was raised in the era of trigger warnings and trauma-informed practices, while Gen X kids watched a teacher die on live TV in our classrooms with zero follow-up on how we were processing it. Those differences became apparent real quick at the end of this movie.

3) Gen Z fixates on boundary-crossing behavior that Gen X overlooked

The other reaction I wasn't expecting was the utter disdain my girls showed for Knox Overstreet, the sweet-but-over-eager character who fell for the football player's cheerleader girlfriend. His boundary-crossing attempts to woo her were always cringe, but for Gen X, cringe behavior in the name of love was generally either overlooked, tolerated, or sometimes even celebrated. (Standing on a girl's lawn in the middle of the night holding a full-volume stereo over your head was peak romance for Gen X, remember.) For Gen Z, the only thing worse than cringe is predatory behavior, which Knox's obsessiveness and pushiness could be seen as. My young Gen X lens saw him and said, "That's a bit much, dude. Take it down a notch or three." My Gen Z daughters' lens said, "That guy's a creepo. She needs to run far the other way."

On one hand, I was proud of them for recognizing red flag behaviors. On the other hand, I saw how little room there is for nuance in their perceptions, which was…interesting.

My Gen Z kids' reactions aren't wrong; they're just different than mine were at their age. We're usually on the same page, so seeing them have a drastically different reaction to something I loved at their age was really something. Now I'm wondering what other favorite movies from my youth I should show them to see if they view those differently as well—hopefully without them feeling traumatized by the experience.

For Black people, something as simple as taking a walk isn't so simple.

Though we're all part of the same species living on the same planet, our experience as humans walking through this world can differ widely. Children see things through a different lens than adults. Women and men have different perspectives on certain issues. And because racism has long been an active element in our society, people with varying amounts of melanin in their skin face specific challenges that others don't.

As a white American, I don't instinctively know what it's like to walk in a Black person's shoes. I can tell you about the legacy of white supremacy laced throughout our country's history. I can explain the far-reaching effects of slavery, lynch mobs, Jim Crow laws, redlining, mass incarceration, and more. I can intellectually break down the psychological and sociological impact of centuries of race-based oppression.

But I can't tell you what it feels like to walk through this world, right now, as a Black person—which is why it's so important to listen to the voices of people who can.

David Summers shared a story on Facebook that reflects the experience of many Black Americans—one that can help us non-Black folks see through a lens we simply do not and cannot have. Perhaps that's why it's been shared more than 20,000 times. From the fear that any object he carries might be mistaken as a gun to figuring out how to smile at a stranger just right so he won't be considered a threat, the "black thoughts" Summers describes during his walk through a beautiful, white neighborhood—presumably a neighborhood most of us would consider "safe"—are heartbreaking.

He wrote:

"I took a black walk this morning. I took a black walk through a white neighborhood. When I take black walks, I think black thoughts. I am conscious of where I've placed my gun, my gun, and my gun. I mean, my phone, my wallet, and my keys. Because Peace Officers have a hard time telling the difference. I rehearse what I'll say if a concerned resident, or a law enforcement employee has questions about why my black body is walking through their white space. And I remind myself to make sure the law enforcement employee has his body camera recording. Sometimes it helps if there is video evidence to accompany the hashtag.

There is no way to be stealthy when you take a black walk. White neighborhoods are blanketed by a sophisticated security system comprised of nosy neighbors, Ring doorbell cameras, and white women walking their dogs. So, I've learned to notice the white world through my periphery. To be aware of the dangers without acknowledging them. There is an art to making white people feel safe. To say 'Good Morning' and flash a smile that shows confidence and deference at the same time. To being polite because your life depends on it.

I felt the squad car behind me before I saw it.

It moved deliberately. Not like the other cars mindlessly whizzing past. Its tires inched. Crept. Stalked their way toward me.

I kept walking.

"Don't take your hands out of your pockets," I thought. Or wait, maybe I should? Maybe it's better if my hands are clearly empty. But it's cold outside…maybe it's nothing. Keep walking.

The car rolled past me and made a slow right turn. I glanced quickly but didn't stare. The air is still. My ears tuned out everything but the slight scuff of my sneakers on the sidewalk and the fading sound of those stalking tires.

Almost there.

Suddenly the squad car re-emerged. It was a block ahead of me. It made a quick right turn, continued to the end of the street, and then waited. No more stalking. This was a show of force. This was a roar. This was a reminder that I was trespassing.

I kept walking.

As I approached the corner, the front window began to roll down. The occupant didn't speak. Didn't smile. Just stared. I was being warned.

I crossed the street and the lion trotted off. He had effectively marked his territory. The brave protector had done his job.

I however, couldn't help but wonder what I'd missed during my black walk. It's hard to hear the birds chirping, or to smile at the squirrels playfully darting along the branches when you're on a black walk. It's easy to miss the promise of a light blue sky, or appreciate the audacity of the red, yellow, and purple daisies declaring their independence from the green grass when your mind is preoccupied with black thoughts.

I took a walk through a beautiful neighborhood this morning. But I missed the whole thing."

Thank you, Mr. Summers, for sharing your "black walk" experience. Hopefully, it will prompt us all to ask ourselves whether our words and actions serve to reinforce or remedy what you've described.


This article originally appeared five years ago.

The impulse and ability to create art is one of the highlights of being human. It's a key quality that sets us apart from the animal world, one that makes life more meaningful and enjoyable. While there are artistic skills that make it easier for people to bring their imaginations into the visible, tangible world, art doesn't abide by any hard and fast rules. Especially kids' art. Especially young kids' art.

That's why Gemma Leighton, mother of 6-year-old Edie, shared her daughter's painting on Twitter with a request for support. Edie created the painting in an after school art club, and her art teacher told her she did it wrong. "You can't do art wrong!" wrote Leighton. "She was so upset as art is her favourite thing to do."

Now, we don't know exactly what the teacher said to Edie, but if a 6-year-old comes home upset and feeling like there's something wrong with their art, the teacher did something wrong. Full stop. Six-year-olds are just beginning to learn about technique, and encouragement is the most vital thing a teacher can offer a budding artist.

The internet rightfully pounced to Edie's defense, and the responses are incredibly heartwarming.


Many people shared how hurt they were as children when a teacher told them something was wrong with their art—and that they were wrong. Knowing that grown-ups had experienced the same kinds of unnecessary criticism as kids and realized that it was wrong can help Edie feel confident that her painting is not "wrong."



Others pointed out the famous artists that her painting reminded them of. Seeing how her own painting reflects some of the style and color choices of professional artists can help Edie see the spark of genius in her own artwork.

Songwriter Kimya Dawson, most famous for her songs in the movie Juno, shared that a middle school English teacher had told her to stop writing poems because they were "too juvenile."

"I never stopped though and making rhyming poems has been my career for over 20 years!" Dawson wrote. "Your painting is perfect! Keep it up! Don't worry what anyone else thinks."


Professional artists chimed in with words of encouragement, pointing out that Edie's use of perspective and expressionism were quite impressive for her age.

"The only 'wrong' is not making art that speaks from your heart," wrote an artist who goes by @Artsy on Twitter. "When she expresses her passion, her vision of her world, her personal reactions to what she sees and feels, she'll never be 'wrong.'"

Even KISS guitarist Paul Stanley offered Edie words of encouragement.

"Your art is AWESOME!!!" he wrote. "There is no such thing as doing art 'wrong.' There are only teachers who are wrong!!! Your art shows amazing freedom and spirit. How can that be 'wrong'?!?! Keep doing EXACTLY what you are doing. I LOVE it!!!"

Imagine being a heartbroken 6-year-old who has been told by a teacher that her art was wrong, and then seeing a flood of thousands of supportive comments from people who looked at the same piece of art and told you what they loved about it. This is how social media should be used. To lift people up, to encourage and inspire, to share beauty and creativity.

Leighton created a new Twitter account called Edie's Art for people to share kids' artwork, and gracious, it's a delight to peruse. There's nothing more pure, more colorful, more full of life than art that came from a child's imagination. They may not have the technical skills to perfectly create what they envision in their minds or what they're looking at for inspiration, but that's part of what makes it so beautiful. They aren't self-conscious enough yet to hold back, and their art comes from a place of confidence and acceptance of their own abilities—that is, until some adult comes along and squashes their artistic spirit.


One of my favorite things as a parent has been watching my kids' artistic expressions evolve as they've grown, and I've loved their artwork at every stage. And not just because I'm their mom, but because kid creations are the best reminder of how natural the human impulse to create really is, and how beautiful it is when we share that impulse without fear or doubt.

Keep painting, Edie. Don't let one person's opinion—even a teacher's—hold you back.


This article originally appeared four years ago.

Education

Voice recordings of people who were enslaved offer incredible first-person accounts of U.S. history

"The results of these digitally enhanced recordings are arresting, almost unbelievable. The idea of hearing the voices of actual slaves from the plantations of the Old South is as powerful—as startling, really—as if you could hear Abraham Lincoln or Robert E. Lee speak." - Ted Koppel

Library of Congress

Some history is not as old as we think.

When we think about the era of American slavery, many of us tend to think of it as the far distant past. While slavery doesn't exist as a formal institution today, modern slavery endures at a systemic level worldwide, and there are people living who knew formerly enslaved Black Americans first-hand. In the wide arc of history, the legal enslavement of Black people on U.S. soil is a recent occurrence—so recent, in fact, that we have voice recordings of interviews with people who lived it.

Many of us have read written accounts of enslavement, from Frederick Douglass's autobiography to some of the 2,300 first-person accounts housed in the Library of Congress. But how many of us have heard the actual voices of people who were enslaved telling their own stories?

ABC News' Nightline with Ted Koppel aired a segment in 1999 in which we can hear the first-person accounts of people who had been enslaved taken from interviews conducted in the 1930s and 40s (also housed in the Library of Congress). They include the voice of a man named Fountain Hughes, who was born into slavery in 1848 and whose grandfather had "belonged to" Thomas Jefferson.

As Koppel says in the segment, "The results of these digitally enhanced recordings are arresting, almost unbelievable. The idea of hearing the voices of actual slaves from the plantations of the Old South is as powerful—as startling, really—as if you could hear Abraham Lincoln or Robert E. Lee speak."

Indeed, hearing formerly enslaved people share their experiences of being bought and sold like cattle, sleeping on bare pallets, and witnessing whippings for insubordination is a heartbreaking reminder of how close we are to this ugly chapter of our history. The segment is well worth the watch:

This article originally appeared five years ago.

Older people benefit from investing in, offering experience, and hanging with younger folks.

When we get older, we want to get better. Sure, we will tire more quickly and more often than our younger selves, but that doesn’t mean we want our later years to be ones of boredom, solitude, and stagnation. Well, a recent study is showing the secret to a more fulfilling and happier life when you become a senior. The answer? Giving back to the youth.

A study published in the The Journals of Gerontology: Series B is showing that the majority of seniors that live healthier, happier, and more fulfilling lives express a trait known as “generativity.” Generativity is a concern for people aside from family, most notably younger generations. It’s the desire to engage and guide with the “whippersnappers” on a societal level through social interactions and service.

Old man and younger woman tending to a vegetable garden.Older volunteers can help boost community projects, like a neighborhood garden, alongside younger adults.Photo credit: Canva

“Contrary to popular perceptions of old age as a period of decline and inactivity, a growing body of empirical research and the lived experiences of many people reveal a different reality,” said Mohsen Joshanloo, the author of the study and an associate professor at Keimyung University. “Old age can be a time of fulfillment, productivity, and meaningful social contribution, with generativity playing a critical role in promoting active and successful aging.”

The traits within older people who practice generativity are also ones that happen to make a person happier and more whole during their senior years. They are more energetic and active, usually due to having more social connections with people from different generations and thus being more physically active to keep up with them. Generativity also tends to make elders more open to new experiences and encourage curiosity, which in turn gives them more exposure to different kinds of people from different demographics. Their willingness to share their wisdom and experience with the youth promotes more cognitive function to keep up with them, and engaging conversations keep the brain more practiced and elastic.

In short, the best thing we can do for ourselves for our lives as we get older is to team up with folks who are younger!

Older man playing chess against a young womanThere is no real "us versus them" when it comes to generations (except in chess games).Photo credit: Canva

If you have scrolled through the internet on your phone, you are bound to have seen a wide variety of boomer versus Millennial versus Gen Z and back again articles, videos, TikToks, and other forms of content. You may have even read or seen some of them here on Upworthy. But while many of these articles are intended to be good fun in poking at the various generational “teams,” there are also many that focus on the division and derision among them.

But every generation eventually gets old. It’s for the best everyone involved to push aside stereotypes and look at what we can offer the generation below us. After all, in exchange for experience to the youth, the youth can provide knowledge of the new. A bit of senior wisdom can provide youthful energy and execution of that wisdom. Who knows, maybe age won’t be anything really but a number?

An older woman and younger man having coffee and pastries together in a cafeJust chatting over coffee can do wonders for people of all ages.Photo credit: Canva

So if you’re an older person, get involved! Join community volunteer groups with the youngsters. Have coffee with your 30-something-year-old neighbors next door. Teach that teenager across the hall how to play chess. Go to the local high school basketball game to cheer them on, even if you don’t have kids that attend there. Be “that old guy” in the yoga class.

The more exposure you have to the youth, the less likely you’ll develop preconceived notions about them. At the same time, they’ll have less preconceived notions about you in return.