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Wellness

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Wondering where she got that rested glow? She hurkle-durkled.

Desperate times call for desperate, or sometimes even utterly ridiculous, measures. "Hurkle-durkle" might be the silliest-sounding phrase ever, but it could be the missing step in your self-care routine. Hurkle-durkling simply means to linger in bed long past the time when you “should” already be up. It’s a Scottish term dating back to the 1800s, originally having more to do with sitting in a crouching position either for warmth or secrecy, but it eventually took on a more relaxed and positive connotation.

It’s a word that only the biggest etymology enthusiast would know had it not been plucked from obscurity thanks to TikTok. Now, it's gone viral. The hurkle-durkling trend seems to have started with actress Kira Kosarin when she shared it as her “word of the day.” “I do be hurkling," she joked, "and I do be durkling and once I’ve hurkled my last durkle in a given morning I will get up, but I’m a big fan of a hurkle-durkle."


@kirakosarin

hurkle-durkle, u deserve it <3

Kosarin’s clip prompted others to share videos of themselves enjoying a good hurkle-durkling, blissfully wrapped in their sheets, basking in the sunlight, leisurely reading, etc. One woman hailing from Scotland even joked, “[The Scottish] knew it was so critical to well-being they made a whole term about it. So, no, I’m not being lazy or wasting my life. I’m practicing an ancestral right of passage. I’m connecting with my culture and heritage.”

It sounds awesome, refreshing, and freeing...but at this point you might be thinking, Wait, isn’t this just bed-rotting?

Bed-rotting, another TikTok trend about lying in bed, and hurkle-durkling are similar, but have very different contexts. Bed-rotting has more to do with symptoms of burnout and fatigue, whereas hurkle-durkling is a bit more hygge, if you will. It’s seen as a pleasurable activity meant to promote rest for overall wellbeing. Plus, a hurkle-durkle has an end in sight, whereas bed-rotting can take up an entire weekend, or longer.

bed-rotting, hurkle-durkling, bed rot, hurkle durkle, rest, burn out Bed-rotting has a more negative connotation...Image via Canva

No matter how silly "hurkle-durkle" sounds, it could be seriously good for us. A 2017 study found that sleeping in, even a couple days a week, reduce the chances of a heart attack or stroke by 63%, especially for folks who get less than six hours of sleep through the rest of the week (so, everyone, basically). Not only that, but getting those few extra minutes of shut-eye from hitting the snooze can help increase alertness and boost our mood.

Really, as with any self care practice, balance is key. Experts warn against staying in bed as an everyday practice or to avoid responsibilities an uncomfortable feelings, especially as too much inactivity can worsen feelings of depression. In some cases, sleeping in can also be dangerous to your health because many people tend to sleep in or oversleep as a way to "catch up" on the sleep they may have missed throughout the week. Experts suggest adults get seven to nine hours of sleep per night. Failing to do so can accumulate over time and lead to sleep debt, which is hard to escape and can increase the risk of health issues like obesity, heart disease, and more. In short, sleeping in on weekends is okay when done mindfully and moderately; in this context, it can actually be the rejuvenation we long for and that too many of us don’t grant ourselves.

In fact, Kristin Wilson, a licensed professional counselor and chief experience officer, told Yahoo Life that perhaps so many people are leaning into silly, catchy terms like "hurkle-durkle" because they make rest and self-care—activities many Americans "are hesitant to celebrate and fully embrace”—more accessible. Popular accounts like The Nap Ministry Self Care is for Everyone on Instagram prove that social media can play a major role in making self-care accessible and acceptable, with each account sporting 553 thousand and one million followers respectively.

"Sometimes our bodies just need a break, and we don’t want to feel guilty about taking time to rest," Wilson explained. "Giving this behavior a clever social media name can make it feel more socially acceptable and when it trends and becomes popular, it normalizes the need for relaxation within the community of followers."

So with that, show yourself some love with a little hurkle-durkle. It’s fun to say, and oh so important to do.

This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

Wellness

How to stop waking up each night at 3 or 4 in the morning

The good news is that there are ways to get back to sleep and stop the downward anxiety spiral.

A woman with her eye mask on in bed.

Do you often wake up at 3 or 4 a.m. with an intense feeling of anxiety? Do you get stressed that you’re awake and begin making a mental laundry list of everything you need to do the next day? Do you start thinking about fights you once had with your spouse or ponder how you have let yourself down in the past?

If so, you’re not alone. It’s common for people to wake up at 3 or 4 a.m. regularly and there’s a reason why we choose this time to catastrophize and worry. The good news is that there are some steps we can take to get through that awkward phase of the night so we can wake up refreshed.

Why do I wake up at 3 or 4 a.m. every night?

Many of us reliably wake up in the middle of the night because after we’ve had a good chunk of sleep, our bodies start to slowly prepare us for the day by reducing melatonin, the hormone that puts us to sleep and increasing levels of cortisol, the stress hormone.

That biological phase of sleep is why we start to feel stressed.



insomnia, sleep, sleep hacks, how to sleep better, melatonin, stress A woman struggles with insomniaImage via Canva


After the big hormone release at 3 or 4 in the morning, if you are dealing with stress in your life, you are more likely to wake up. If your life is calmer and you don’t already have a stress baseline, you will probably wake up, fall asleep quickly and forget that it happened.

Why do I wake up feeling stressed in the middle of the night?

If you’re already experiencing stress in your life, that extra cortisol kick is going to cause you to wake up with a feeling of anxiety. The problem is that when we’re lying in bed in the middle of the night, we are in a vulnerable position. “Around this time in the sleep cycle, we’re at our lowest ebb physically and cognitively. From nature’s viewpoint, this is meant to be a time of physical and emotional recovery, so it’s understandable that our internal resources are low,” Greg Murray, a psychology researcher with expertise in mood, sleep, and the circadian system, writes in The Conversation.

“But we also lack other resources in the middle of the night – social connections, cultural assets, all the coping skills of an adult are unavailable at this time,” Murray continues. “With none of our human skills and capital, we are left alone in the dark with our thoughts. So the mind is partly right when it concludes the problems it’s generated are unsolvable – at 3 a.m., most problems literally would be.”


insomnia, sleep, sleep hacks, melatonin, stress, anxiety A woman struggles with insomniaImage via Canva

At this moment, when we’re stressed and feeling vulnerable, stuck in bed with no way out, we can begin to spiral. This is when we ruminate on why we forgot to feed the dog that one day in 1994 or contemplate why things went bad with your first significant other at 21. It’s when we start recalling a disagreement with a friend and plotting out what we’ll say the next time the issue arises.

At this point, if we don’t stop spiraling, we’ll be up until 5 a.m. and will feel like garbage when it’s time to go to work.

The good news is that there are ways to get back to sleep and stop the downward anxiety spiral.

Make a list

Dr. Jade Wu says that if you wake up and feel stressed about things you need to take care of, walk out of your room (so you don’t associate it with stressors) and make a list to read in the morning. This will free you of your worries, because you know you can care for them when you are awake.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Pay attention to your breath

Murray says you should redirect your attention from your thoughts to your breath, which is a form of meditation. “I bring my attention to my senses, specifically the sound of my breath. When I notice thoughts arising, I gently bring my attention back to the sound of breathing,” Murray writes in The Conversation. This works in 2 ways: first, it takes your attention away from your spiraling thoughts and second, the breathing exercise helps you relax.


Have a bite to eat

Sometimes, we wake up in the middle of the night because we’re hungry and our blood sugar is dropping. “The first question I ask [my patients] is, ‘When was the last time you ate?’” Michael Breus, Ph.D. psychologist specializing in sleep disorders, told Sleep.com. “Often, they’ve finished their last meal at 7 p.m.; now it’s 3 in the morning — that’s eight hours later — so guess what? They’re out of fuel.” If you’ve woken up because of a drop in blood sugar, experts recommend eating a small snack that includes protein and fat, like peanut butter.

This article originally appeared last year.

Can you eat the same thing for lunch every single day?

We all know people's relationships with food varies, but many of us may not realize how vastly that spectrum differs. On one end, we have people whose entire lives revolve around food. On the other are people who genuinely don't care about it and wish they didn't ever have to think about food.

Most of us exist somewhere in the middle, but one man's lunch habits have people pondering exactly where they land on that spectrum—as well as how much their position on it is costing them.

food, yummy, delicious, eating, relationship with food Some of us love food a lot more than others. Giphy

"There's this guy in my office who brings the same lunch to work every single day: one hard-boiled egg, a scoop of rice, and half an avocado," a user on Reddit wrote. "He says it costs him about $1.25 per meal. No snacks, no drinks besides water. Just that. Every. Day."

"At first I thought he was doing some sort of minimalist diet or maybe struggling financially, but nope.." they continued, "he’s just super into optimizing his expenses. Says he’s calculated that this routine saves him over $2,500 a year compared to when he used to eat out. He meal preps it all in bulk on Sunday, packs it into identical containers, and doesn’t seem to get bored at all. Even when we order pizza or someone brings in donuts, he politely declines and says, 'Already got my lunch.'"


from Frugal

The person said they were impressed with their coworker's discipline but they could never do it because they need variety. Then they asked if anyone else goes "this hard with frugal food routines," which got people sharing their experiences with others on the extreme of the "caring about food" spectrum:

"Some people just don’t like food. They just see eating as a necessary bodily function and nothing more. I suspect that might be this guy's secret."

"I'm that guy. I used to do the same for work, and now I'm 71, and I have the identical breakfast, lunch, and dinner Monday through Friday."

"You sound like my vegan great uncle. He's in his late '70s but is healthy as a horse. He wakes up at 5:00 a.m. and walks 5 miles. He then spends 30 minutes chopping his veggies and fruits and preparing his meals for the day. For breakfast he has almond milk, oats, and fruit. For lunch and dinner he has some combination of grilled peppers, vegetables, spinach, tofu, and beans. At night he snacks on Rosemary crackers dipped in olive oil.

My mom said that he told her that he has been eating that same diet for the last 50 years."

food, eating, vegetables, cooking, nutrition Some people eat purely for health and nutrition.Photo credit: Canva

"Some people eat because they have to, not because they want to. You can usually tell because they are ones meal-prepping and eating the exact same thing the whole week. They don't want to think about food. It's the people that say 'if you give me a pill and I wouldn't have to eat, I would take the pill.'"

"I’d even take photosynthesis and have green skin if it meant I could not have to eat."

"100%. Have said before that if there was a pill I could take that was free, 100% nutritionally perfect, never leave me hungry, mean perfect muscle growth, etc, and replaced all my meals but meant that I couldn't eat regular food again, I would take it.

Some people usually agree and some others think I'm completely crazy. It is usually one or the other."

food, eating, pill, meals, relationship with food Some people would take a pill if it meant they didn't have to eat food. Giphy

While there's nothing wrong with enjoying food—cooking is an art, after all—there are several reasons people might want to explore a more detached relationship with it. For one, it can save you money, but it also might help you eat more healthfully. The Cleveland Clinic lists healthy habits and eating less (which most Americans could benefit from) as pros for eating the same meal every day. As long as you're getting some food variety for gut and nutritional health, repeating meals can simplify healthy eating while also saving time and energy.

It's also not a new concept. The ancient Stoics took a moderate and self-disciplined approach to food, seeing it as a simply a means to good health and strength. Eating slowly and mindfully, avoiding gluttony and heavy or expensive foods, and mastering the appetite as a means of self-control are hallmarks of the Stoic approach to eating. Eating the same simple, cheap, but healthy meal for lunch every day is certainly one way to live that philosophy.

food, eating, meals, lunch, food prep Simplifying our approach to food can be healthy.Photo credit: Canva

Some of us go far in the other direction, making every meal a major food event, but there's something to be said for letting food just be fuel sometimes. Letting food be unexciting can be difficult when we have an emotional relationship with eating, though. Kylie Mitchell, a counselor specializing in eating disorders, wrote that as she recovered from her eating disorder, she had to remind herself that "every meal does NOT have to be a gourmet experience." She explained how food becoming boring was a transition for her emotionally:

"As my recovery has progressed, I’ve experienced food become less and less interesting. At first, quite honestly, I felt like it sucked. What once brought me so much joy* didn’t anymore because eating satisfying food was no longer a novelty. I ate satisfying foods every time I wanted them and that brought a lot of positives: a less turbulent relationship with food, ease with eating out, and more brain space to focus on living a more whole life. All these things were good (actually they were fan-freaking-tastic), but the sensational, exuberant, flooded-with-relief feeling I once got when eating was gone. I missed that for a while because for several years eating gave me such a high** that I wasn’t getting anymore.

*it wasn’t truly 'joy' I was feeling though. It was really a sense of control that gave me a short term sense of stability over my mood.

**same as above but replace 'joy' with 'a high.'"

This isn't to say that eating can't or shouldn't be a joyful experience, but rather to acknowledge that our relationships with food can be complicated (especially in the U.S. where we have an abundance of food options). Whether we would choose to eat an egg, rice, and avocado every single day for lunch ourselves, the wide range of perspectives on food means we have a lot that we can learn from one another to create a healthy balance.

Image via Instagram/@izzifriedman (with permission)

96-year-old Marty Friedman shares his daily routine for staying healthy and vital in old age.

Living to 96 years old is a feat of strength, will power and grit. And making the choice to keep going, even as your body and mind slowly deteriorate, is an honorable pursuit. And its one that 96-year-old grandpa Marty Friedman is fully embracing.

In an inspiring video shared by his granddaughter Izzi Friedman, he spilled his exact daily routine that has kept him healthy and mentally sharp at 96-years-old.

"When you're 96, you look around...everyone you knew is dead. They're dad or with a walker--they don't go on the treadmill anymore. They don't do anything. Waiting to die," he says, noting that at his home in Florida, it's a phrase he hears all the time from his peers.

"I go see people and they say, 'Where have you been? When did you get here?' I said, 'I've been here 2 months'," adding that they tell him they haven't seen him in the card room or lunch room. Instead, he is out and about getting active.

"The problem is that I'm still active in exercising. I'm still active in playing golf. I'm still active, okay?" he says. "I'm not here to die. I'm here to live. When you're here to die, what you want to do is eat a lot and go to every lunch. Overeat and don't exercise. Terrible!"

Next, he gives viewers a rundown of a typical 24 hours in his life. "I sleep 9 hours at night, and I sleep 2-and-a-half hours average a day in the afternoon," he says. "Here's what I have to do in 11 hours: I have to exercise for an hour. Doesn't have to be everyday, 4 or 5 days out of the 7."

He adds that he also eats, and prioritizes his time to learn. "You need time to learn. Read and learn--what's new? I mean most people don't know that Elon Musk's mother May Musk is a millionaire herself without Elon, and that she's a famous model from Canada. That's terrific! Why do I need that information? I guess I don't! But I like to have it. It makes me feel good." He notes that he also reads magazines, including Fortune, Forbes and Newsweek.

And viewers are completely inspired by his routine and attitude on living a full, healthy life at 96 years old. "Sharp as a tack and doesn’t seem a day over 70, tbh. Super inspirational stuff. Thanks for sharing," one commented. Another added, "This is the sharpest 96 year old I’ve ever seen. WOW good for him." And another wrote, "Vital. Learning. Curious. This man is timeless!😍"

In another video, he shared more specifics on his workout routine, which includes weight lifting with 8 pound weights and mobility exercises on his back. and toe touches. "You want to be flexible. You want to keep all the muscles in your body active," he says.

Mary also elaborated on his diet in another video, and what he eats to stay healthy at 96. His breakfast is usually "light", and includes oatmeal, berries, yogurt or cottage cheese. He also focuses on produce with bright colors, like grapefruit. "I think grapefruit's one of my favorite things to eat. I think grapefruit is one of the healthiest things to eat," he says.

He also believes in eating early and limiting meat consumption. "Everything in moderation," he says.