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kat hong

This could rewire her brain positively.

When Alex Bennett talks to her baby daughter Tate, she doesn’t use baby talk or silly voices. Instead, in her viral TikTok videos, she delivers high-speed, stream-of-consciousness monologues that would feel right at home in a scene from Gilmore Girls orThe Marvelous Mrs. Maisel (pretty much anything written by Amy Sherman-Palladino, essentially). In a world used to spouting nonsense like “goo-goo” and “ga-ga” to babies, Alex’s approach is a refreshing reprise—and, according to scientists, might be a genius parenting move. Alex and her little one’s candid conversations aren’t just making the Internet swoon (Bennett's TikTok, @justalexbennett, has amassed 1.2 million followers, by the way). These chats could be rewiring baby Tate’s cognitive development for the better.


mother, daughter, parents, kids, women, talkingPerfect mother-daughter yap couple. Giphy

The beauty of babbling

Even though most parents instinctively use a high-pitched baby voice to talk to their infants, Bennett treats her sweet baby like a dear old friend. She yammers on about everything, from her thoughts on mommy-daughter matching outfits to the latest nanny drama.

And who could blame her? There’s so much to discuss: their plans for the night (watching hockey, followed by a new card game called Four Nations), the perfect surprise for dad’s birthday (bravely, they’ll be attempting a lava cake for the first time but they have a back-up plan just in case that fails: store-bought chocolate chip cupcakes), and the intricacies of making “parent friends” (as Alex explains, “All of this matters: 'Where do they live?' 'How old’s the baby?' Because if they had a baby that was two or three years old, they’d be able to walk and,” she pauses and looks at Tate, sweetly. “You’re not quite there yet.”). She even introduces her to the concept of “bedrotting” in one video, with the two of them snuggled up in their pajamas with zero plans to leave any time soon. No sing-song voice, no made-up or cutesy words. It’s as if they’re just two adult friends having a conversation, albeit Tate doesn’t speak much. But when she does manage to fit in a burble or two, her mom listens in rapt attention before responding accordingly.


“Her first word will be a paragraph!” commented one viewer. And according to science, she may not be far off.

Why this matters more than you think

While the videos are certainly cute (in one, Alex and Tate co-conspire—well, as much as a seven-month-old can—to convince dad to make them ground turkey bowls for dinner), according to research done by Kathy Hirsh-Pasek, a professor of psychology at Temple University and author of "Becoming Brilliant: What Science Tells Us About Raising Successful Children," there is an essential link between the amount of language children hear and their eventual language development. And the results don’t take long.

“Simply put, the more language children hear, the more words they produce.”


- YouTubewww.youtube.com

In a 2013 study called “Talking to children matters: Early language experience strengthens processing and builds vocabulary,” study authors Adriana Weisleder and Anne Fernald found that the more parents spoke to their children using “adult-style speech," the larger their vocabulary grew. By the time they reached two years old, these verbose children could already process words much better than their peers.

Yes, some of the comments on Alex’s videos are funny ( one user said, “So you’re telling me all I have to do is pop out a friend to talk to?”), but many others recognize the science at play here.


“This baby is going to be incredibly smart and articulate,” wrote another viewer, with another adding, “Jokes aside, this is actually the best way to stimulate proper language development in babies.”


How to set your kid up for success (by being a total motormouth)

Not all parents are convinced, though, that speaking to babies like mini-adults is such a good idea. "For one, they can’t speak back," a skeptic might sneer. Others roll their eyes and say something like “this feels weird and forced.”

The good news? There is no “right” way to speak to your newborns. But here are a few tips, just in case.

  1. Pay attention to their non-verbal reactions. The solution seems so simple, right? Just talk to your kids more. Speak nonstop, introduce more and more new words, and never, ever come up for air. Wrong. Just because they can't communicate through language, research suggests that children naturally pick up words and labels for things they find interesting. So, when it comes to introducing new words to babies, Harvard professor Catherine Snow, a pioneering researcher in the language and literacy field, recommends keeping an eye out for anything that might interest them: extra special gestures, excited noises, or facial expressions, and starting there. “Don’t wait for children to produce clear words before [you] start interpreting the noises that children make,” she warns. A toddler’s babbling isn’t something to scoff at: it’s their first attempt at communicating.
  2. Let them talk, too! As fun as it is to have a captive—and mostly silent—audience, there’s a subtle difference between talking at children and engaging with them. “If the adults just talk all the time, that doesn't work very well,” Snow adds. Interaction is key: notice what they’re interested in and comment on it. Label what they’re looking at. If they try to communicate, wait calmly and listen before responding. Alex has this down in spades. In a video, she begins to explain the family's plans for the night (they’re in Aspen at the moment), when suddenly, Tate begins to play with her mommy's face. Instead of correcting her or swatting her hands away, Alex just rolls with it, gleefully letting her daughter rub her tiny paws wherever she chooses, before asking her, laughing, “Do you like my red lips?”
  3. It’s all about context. The trick to teaching your toddler new words? Using them in the correct and natural context. For example, Snow paints a picture of a family gathering at the dinner table, where everyone is seated and alert. There are dozens of ways to demonstrate healthy language for the baby: A sibling might ask Mom about her day. If a car honks in the distance, someone could ask where the noise is coming from. 'Why are we eating chicken?' 'What is chicken?' 'Where does it come from?' The constant questions may seem tedious (especially when the people asking them likely know the answer), but Snow insists that these casual conversations are the foundations for babies to access new words and concepts.


parenting, language acquisition, learning, babies, mothers and daughters, speakingThis could change everything.Photo credit: Canva


Why this could change everything

Dr. Dana Suskind, founder and co-director of the Thirty Million Words Center for Early Learning + Public Health (and the co-writer of "Becoming Brilliant: What Science Tells Us About Raising Successful Children" with Kathy Hirsh-Pasek) has dedicated her research to encouraging parents to embrace their power as “brain architects.” As caretakers, everything—the words, sentences, ideas, and phrases a parent says (or withholds)—from their child can make a world of difference. Every word a baby hears, whether it’s about their new pajamas, the ribs and coleslaw being prepared for dinner tonight, or who will be at their next play date, all somehow seeps into their brain. They hear you, even though they can't quite understand you yet. These seemingly trivial conversations are literally the building blocks of language acquisition, and they are constructing your little one’s developing brain brick by brick, word by word.

So, remember: talking to your baby like an adult, with full-on sentences and lots of details, doesn't make you crazy: you’re building a stronger, smarter, and more loquacious future adult, one conversation at a time. They might even know what 'loquacious' means before preschool!

Wellness

"Time affluence" can radically change how you view your daily life

Not enough hours in the day? This might be for you.

A powerful new way to take control of your day.

What does it really mean to be wealthy? Having a hefty bank account and multiple streams of income? A fancy job with an even fancier-sounding name? ("Director" has a nice ring to it, don't you think?) There are a million ways to answer this question, but before you do, ask yourself one more: Will that really make me happy? While many of us would love a few more hours in the day, our actions don't reflect that. Often, we as a society spend an inordinate time dedicated to money: making it and saving it. But what about leisure time or rest? Yes, money is important, but without the time to do things we actually enjoy, what’s the point?

A growing body of research suggests something revolutionary: that a concept called “time affluence” is the true measure of a person's wealth. Rather than nice cars or a corner office in a high-rise building downtown, time affluence is the real key to happiness and well-being. Time affluence refers to the idea that, like money, time is a resource that can be saved, spent, and wasted. According to Ashley V. Whillans, a professor of business administration at Harvard Business School and the author of Time Smart: How to Reclaim Your Time and Live a Happier Life, time affluence is the “feeling of having control and feeling like you have enough time on an everyday basis.” Her research indicates that those who value time over money tend to live happier, more civically engaged lives and are more inclined to pursue activities they’re passionate about.

So, why do so many of us feel like we’re running out of time?


Meet “time poverty”

Time affluence exists on a spectrum, with "time poverty" at the opposite end. While time-affluent people experience increased autonomy, improved moods, and enhanced states of mindfulness, those experiencing time poverty live in a world of constant stress. They remain fixated on work and productivity, feeling perpetually overwhelmed by an endless list of tasks with seemingly insufficient time to complete them. Research shows that time poverty leads to decreased well-being, poor physical health, and reduced productivity—yet why aren't we addressing this crisis? While billions are invested yearly to combat material poverty, while time poverty remains largely ignored and continues to worsen.


stress, frustration, unhappiness, time, time waster, busy, stressedWhy aren't we addressing this growing crisis?Photo credit: Canva

Our relationship with time reveals a troubling reality. Despite the rise of time-saving technologies in recent decades—from Internet to personal computers—these innovations and productivity tools haven't fundamentally changed how we use our time, nor have they increased our sense of time affluence. A 2010 study found that merely 9% of adults reported "quite often" having free time, while 45% claimed they were almost "never free."

Even Whillans recognized something was wrong when she, a successful Harvard Business School professor on the tenure track, felt chronically short on time. Despite her material wealth—the pay, prestige, and job security—she never allowed herself to rest. Her calendar was filled with meetings, but she left herself no space for leisure or personal pursuits. "Focusing our time is not selfish. It's really about making enough time for ourselves that we're able to have the energy and attention to best serve those that we care about," Whillans explained during a presentation in 2020. "We want to be reframing our time to see leisure as something that's productive and restful, and an end to itself."


The elusive concept of “time affluence”

Here's the paradox: having more money or time doesn't necessarily solve the problem—it can actually make it worse. In a study by Sanford E. DeVoe and Jeffrey Pfeffer in 2011, researchers found that people who placed a higher financial value on time (following the old adage "time is money") reported increased time pressure and showed less patience. Similarly, other research indicates that when people overly focus on time's value, they also experience greater psychological and physiological stress, and are less likely to slow down or enjoy leisure activities.


time, running out of time, clock, busy, life, stressWhen it comes to well-being, time does not equal money. Photo credit: Canva

But...too much time can be a problem, too. In a study conducted by Cassie Mogilner Holmes, a psychologist and professor at UCLA’s Anderson School of Management, she looked at the relationship between leisure time and happiness. On one hand, she found that people with less than two hours a day of free time reported decreased levels of happiness. On the other hand, those with more than five hours of free time per day also reported decreased levels of happiness. What’s going on here? It seems that the key to time affluence, which Holmes defines as “feeling confident that you are able to accomplish everything you want to do"—isn’t the abundance of free time or having unlimited hours in the day. “While having some time (i.e. more than two hours) is essential, the positive correlation between time and satisfaction only goes so far,” writes Barnaby Lashbrooke for Forbes. “Being time affluent, then, is less about having an excess of time, and actually about how you use the limited time that you do have.”


How to become time-affluent

So, you want to become time-affluent? Experts suggest the following strategies:

  1. Prioritize ruthlessly. With limited hours in each day, it makes sense to tackle the most important tasks first. Some people follow the Ivy Lee Method, which involves writing down your five most important tasks each evening, then completing them one by one the next day. Others prefer the "1-3-5" rule—focusing on one big task, three medium tasks, and five small tasks daily. Whichever method you choose, always ask yourself: What's the most urgent and important task? Start there.
  2. Buy back time by outsourcing tasks. While money can't buy happiness directly, it can buy precious time through strategic outsourcing. A few well-spent dollars can free you from tasks you dislike or find draining. Consider hiring a house cleaner or paying more in rent to live closer to work. As Laurie Santos, a psychologist and happiness researcher, says, "Studies show that people who spend money to get more free time are often happier than those who don't." But remember—outsourcing doesn't always require money. You can lean on your community, such as arranging alternating school drop-off schedules with neighbors.
  3. Practice “monotasking.” By now, most people know that multitasking isn’t real. It’s a myth—the human mind and brain aren’t sophisticated enough to perform more than two tasks simultaneously. So, do the opposite. Focus on one thing at a time.
  4. Be intentional about leisure time. “We want to be reframing our time to see leisure as something that’s productive and restful, and an end to itself,” advises Whillans. “Focusing on time is not selfish. It’s really in making enough time for ourselves that we’re able to have the energy and attention to best serve those that we care about.” Just like an important meeting or appointment, block time off on your calendar to dedicate purely to leisure and rest. By doing so, you are committing to caring about your well-being, and it’s just as essential as work.

In a world that's always demanding “more” of us—earn more, buy more, do more—perhaps what’s most revolutionary is reclaiming our time. And with it, our happiness.

Parenting

Parents reveal 8 genius hacks for introducing toddlers to newborns without jealousy

Lucie Fink, shared her family's tips for introducing toddlers to their newborn baby siblings without sparking jealousy.

A little effort can go a long way.

Welcoming a newborn into the family is usually a magical occasion. There are pictures to be taken; first moments that must be documented. But for a child, this can be an unsettling experience. One day, it’s just them and their two doting parents. Then, out of nowhere, a tiny baby appears and starts hogging all the attention? How unfair.

Fortunately, there are several strategies parents can use when introducing a toddler to a newborn to minimize feelings of jealousy. In a viral TikTok video, Lucie Fink—a mom of two and host of The Real Stuff podcast—shared how she and her husband successfully introduced their baby girl to Milo, their toddler son, while keeping any potential jealousy at bay. Since it was posted in early February 2025, the video has been met with overwhelming positivity online, garnering 1.6 million likes and over 11 million views.


Child on floor cryingUpsetting, to say the least. Photo credit: Canva


“As a child development major… YES.”

The video begins with Lucie, still in her hospital gown, welcoming her husband and son into the postpartum unit. “I got a balloon for you!” exclaims her toddler. Using strategically placed overlaid text, she details the 8 techniques she and her husband used while introducing their toddler to his newborn baby sister, including adding photos of him to the baby’s bassinet (to make him feel special and included) and transferring the baby to Milo’s arms calmly and intentionally when he was ready and asked to hold her.


Screenshot, woman in hospital bed with child and adult man in roomThe first step toward a lifelong friendship.TikTok, Credit: @luciebfink


Sibling rivalry isn’t inevitable

While sibling rivalry is normal (according to child specialist Alexander K.D. Leung, it “occurs between most, if not all, siblings to varying degrees” and “is as old as mankind”), unmanaged competitive feelings in childhood can lead to psychological problems later in life. “A child who feels threatened of losing parental affection and love may react with rejection or hate towards a new sibling who is often perceived as an ‘intruder,’” Leung notes in his 1991 research article. “This is more common if the child feels insecure as a result of overprotective, excessive domination, parental impatience, or excessive discipline.”

Sibling rivalry begins here, at the onset. Even parents who handled their first child easily may be surprised by the new, constantly shifting dynamics a second baby can bring. Although you can prepare a child for months, even years, to become an older sibling, until they experience it, they won’t actually know what it feels like. Suddenly, it seems like their emotional and physical needs are in direct competition with the baby’s: Who gets their parents’ attention? Who deserves to be fawned over? These changes are real—and scary!—for a child and can cause them to act out or revert to previously outgrown baby behavior, according to the Association of Child Psychotherapists. They write: “It must be remembered that it is the parents who choose to have another baby, not the older sister or brother. They have no say in the matter, and what is, to you, largely a source of happiness may be nothing of the sort to your child.”


baby swathed in pink blanket "It is the parents who choose to have another baby, not the older sister or brother."Photo credit: Canva


8 ways to reduce jealousy, according to Lucie Fink

When the child first enters the room, don’t mention the baby. Instead, focus on them. In the video, we see Lucie greet her son Milo solo, with the baby nearby but out of sight. Although he’s excited to meet her, Lucie stays focused on her son, making direct eye contact and creating a special one-on-one moment just for them.

Place the baby off to the side in a bassinet, so your arms are free to cuddle the other child. At first, Milo is focused solely on the baby, but with his mom’s loving invitation, he jumps into the hospital bed next to her. “Get cozy!” she insists, and the two burrow beneath the plush blanket together.

children, parenting hacks, ice cream, jealousy, parenting advice, parenting tipsTwo children watch another child eating ice creamImage via Cana

Arrange photos of the older child in the baby's bassinet to remind them that they're special and included. "Look, she was looking at pictures of you all day," Lucie says warmly, picking up a photo from the bassinet to show Milo. Several large photos of him are prominently displayed around the baby—a simple yet powerful symbol of their new beginning as siblings.

Transfer the baby calmly and intentionally, waiting for the older child to be ready and to specifically ask to hold them. Don’t rush or force the process. “The preparation of existing children for a new sibling helps to reduce sibling rivalry,” reminds child specialist Alexander K.D. Leung. “Patience, love, understanding, common sense, and humor are important parental skills necessary to minimize sibling rivalry.” Once settled and secure next to his mom, Milo puts out his arms excitedly and asks: “Can I hold?” As his father lowers the baby into his arms, Lucie chimes in with assurance, “Oh, you got her.” Soon, the two are bonding for the first time, and Milo holds his baby sister close.


parenting advice, parenting hacks, parenting, family, modern families, babies, toddlers, affectiontwo children hugImage via Cana

Family hugs signify that you’re a unit. Before long, the dad exclaims, “Family hug!” and the four embrace. Instead of Milo feeling like an outsider, the tender moment reflects a carefully arranged message: “We’re all excited to welcome the fourth member of our family.”

Let the older child hold the newborn at home, but only when they want to. “We try not to pressure him or continually ask if he wants to,” writes Lucie. Finding the perfect balance is key: while it’s important to involve your toddler in baby-related tasks, don’t demand too much of them.


parenting, parenting advice, parenting hacks, children, babies, family A parent waves their finger at a babyImage via Canva

Don’t blame the baby for not being able to attend to their needs. According to BetterHelp, “When a child feels like they must compete for their parent’s love and attention, this feeling might lead to animosity, which can increase over time.” Especially during this transition time, elder children must be reminded that they’re also a priority. Instead of saying, “I need to take care of the baby” or “The baby needs this right now,” Lucie recommends switching up the responsibility. Try: “Daddy’s just finishing up!” or “Mommy will be right there.

Include them in the caretaking process. Lucie writes that with her son, they tell him that it’s “the whole family’s job to work together to care for our weakest member.” Not only will your toddler love having something to do, but simple tasks—asking them to pass you a bottle during feeding time or to please entertain their younger sibling in the backseat when they're fussy—will give the older child a sense of purpose and help them feel more involved.


woman holding newborn babySibling rivalry can't be avoided, but it can be minimized. Photo credit: Canva


Why it’s important to put your toddler first sometimes

While a new baby demands constant attention—and sometimes, your sleep-deprived brain goes on auto-pilot—taking time to acknowledge your toddler’s big feelings is crucial. Even the smallest gesture, like asking for help instead of demanding it, can help build the foundation for a long-lasting, harmonious relationship between siblings. However, if left unaddressed, sibling rivalry can manifest as verbal or physical attacks, persistent demands for attention, or as regressive phenomena” in children. As adults, that behavior can morph into open aggression, cruel manipulation, or avoiding each other altogether.

A study about family dynamics conducted at Cornell University found that after multiple interviews with mothers and their adult children, only 15% of children felt their parents treated them equally compared to their siblings. The research also showed that siblings develop stronger bonds when parents consistently work to treat them fairly and give equal attention to each child.

While parenting often feels unpredictable, Lucie Fink and her husband (along with Milo and the new baby!) demonstrate that small, thoughtful efforts toward your firstborn can make an enormous difference. Watch her entire parenting video below.


Celebrating a child's art can be fun for all.

Have you ever read “The Artist’s Way”? Written by Julia Cameron in 1992, it’s a wonderful workbook that teaches you ways to unlock your creative potential. There are the “morning pages,” a daily ritual in which you wake up, then log three free-written pages by hand, tossing whatever ideas come from your mind onto the page. The weekly “artist date,” which sees you out in the world, enriching your creative soul. And the rotating lessons, each centered around a specific “block” you may have concerning your creativity.

For the uninitiated, this may all sound a bit “woo-woo.” But the core idea is that, unknowingly, society stifles our creativity in a million and one ways. Teachers who were mean and cruel, mocking your attempts at art. Distracted parents, more concerned with grades than anything else. Existence within a culture that prizes financial stability and success over creative outpourings of the soul.

Luckily, the daughter of TikTok user @abigail.ellesociety will never have to worry about any of that. In a joyous viral video (that’s racked up 4.2 million views, 945,000 likes, and over 109,000 shares), Abigail shares the art show she threw her four-year-old daughter. Besides the three-foot-tall host, the video depicts a trendy scene that would look at home in any gallery in Los Angeles or Manhattan.

woman in white long sleeve shirt and blue denim jeans sitting on brown wooden tableIt's never too late (or too early) to unleash your inner artist. Photo by Matthieu Jungfer on Unsplash



“You throw your four-year-old an art show”

Welcome to @abigail.ellesociety’s art show. The video begins with the four-year-old artist in residence dressed in a chic, all-black outfit. She sports a sleek, pulled-back hairdo (no surprise, given that her mom is a hairstylist and owns Elle Society Salon in Troutdale, Oregon) and welcomes admirers, patrons, and fellow peers into the space. Some even arrive with flowers.


children standing next to art exhibitPeople online are loving the four-year-old's art show. Photo credit: Canva

Her art is proudly displayed on the walls. There's Pikachu, depicted in watercolor. Hand-drawn rainbows and purple butterflies. Minions scowling; minions lifting weights. Minions wielding a lasso. (The artist’s affinity for the “Despicable Me” henchmen did not go unnoticed, with the official Illumination’s Minions account commenting, “She’s an artisté ✨”. The official Barbie account also chimed in, commenting, “to be loved is to be seen 💓”.) Peckish guests enjoyed a delicious spread of finger foods, including pigs in a blanket and pinwheel turkey wraps.

In the comments, TikTok users gushed over the four-year-old’s art show, with @zee_nicolee writing, “This new generation of moms are really healing so many of us 🥰🥰 Great job, Mama 🥰”.

@astoldbyawa said, “I’m literally gonna be this type of mom idc.” While @uncancelable.sahra chimed in, “Can you imagine seeing her art in a museum one day?”


How to honor your child’s creativity

The benefits of supporting a child’s art are endless. Beyond the creative realm, honoring their art is a significant step toward fostering self-respect, confidence, and self-expression. Here are 4 ways to celebrate your child’s inner artist.

  1. Take their art seriously. The beauty of the art show is how free it is—it’s not an art show “for kids,” it’s a real, bonafide art show! The artist—and her work—are taken seriously. Have your child sign and date everything they make (and like!) on the back. Save these treasures, either digitally or physically, to create a living record of their artistic journey: a lovely portfolio for them and you!
  2. Create a cork wall display. For a natural, “artsy” feel, constructing a wall-to-wall (or even extremely large) corkboard could provide the perfect canvas for a budding artist’s portfolio. For inspiration, check out this one posted by @florenceandhenri on Instagram, which shows rows and rows of neatly organized child artwork held up by pushpins. It’s an easy way to rotate pieces in and out, and is a nice alternative to the ubiquitous chalk wall. “[A cork wall] helps with acoustics,” writes @florenceandhenri. “It’s tactile and brighter than a wall full of black.”
  3. Repurpose as stationary. This technique saves money—and the planet! Turn artwork into writing cards, thank you notes, and letters by writing on the back. It’s a personal, homey touch that many recipients will appreciate. If you want to go the extra mile, try your hand at the Japanese art of origami and fold the artwork until it becomes an envelope.
  4. Save art in a collage. Although these are precious artifacts, physical copies of a child’s art can accumulate quickly—and if you’re not an archivist, saving them can feel more like a chore than a celebration. Turn those works into a collage, either digitally or physically. You can even get creative with the design, like a collage that looks like your home state or a collage using the letters in your child's name.

Remember, honoring your child’s art is supposed to be fun. If you get trapped in a "do it perfectly" mentality, just refer back to the original art show video. In it, everyone is relaxed and having a good time. The art is hung nicely (but not overly styled or organized). The four-year-old artist is excited to share her work with others. And there are heaps of pigs in a blanket. Those always help. For more inspiration, check out the full art show TikTok below:


@abigail.ellesociety

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