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Trolls called this fat activist a 'landwhale.' Now it's the title of her memoir.

A few months ago, on a clear December day in Paris, France, Jes Baker was standing before a crowd as the city's guest of honor, wearing a shimmering gold dress and a beaming smile.

"La grossophobie, c'est ... bullshit," she told them.

As a fat activist and prominent body image author, she doesn't mince words, even in front of an audience that included the deputy mayor of Paris: Fatphobia is bullshit.

All photos via Jes Baker/The Militant Baker, used with permission.

She was speaking in the ornate salons of Hôtel de Ville as part of a conference of government officials, researchers, activists, and thought leaders from around the world. They had gathered to discuss discrimination against fat people.

The Parisian government, which hosted the event, also unveiled its manifesto challenging anti-fat bias and making a commitment to eradicating it. It was a monumental moment for the city, which had yet to include "size" in its anti-discrimination laws.

But it was also a deeply personal moment for Jes. She could never have imagined that her journey to make peace with her body would someday lead her to Paris, where she would assert the dignity of fat people around the world. And she would do it all while wearing a killer dress and heels.

Almost six years earlier, though, Jes wasn't quite that confident. In fact, she says, that's when she hit her "emotional rock bottom."

At the time, Jes was 26. She was working as a full-time baker, living with a partner who, she says, "would rather watch television while eating chicken nuggets" than be present and engaged with the world or with her. With a demanding job and a lack of intimate connection, Jes occupied her time with lifestyle blogs, including her own about vintage kitchenware.

Surfing the internet one night, Jes found the blog The Nearsighted Owl, written by a woman named Rachele. "I instantly connected with [Rachele's] love of thrifting, cats, and purple beehives," Jes says. But it wasn't the cats or vintage charm of Rachele's blog that captivated Jes the most — it was seeing a fat woman living and loving unapologetically.

While The Nearsighted Owl is no longer online, Rachele's fearless voice led Jes to an important realization. "[I thought] maybe I don't have to hate myself for the rest of my life," Jes recalls. "If she can love herself, maybe I can too?"

Up until that point, this deceptively simple but powerful idea had never crossed her mind.

Inspired, Jes delved into the world of fat acceptance and body positivity, reading everything she possibly could, especially perspectives that were different from her own.

And along the way, those writers gave her something she'd never had before: permission.

"[I found] permission to feel worthy. Of what exactly, in the beginning, I wasn't sure," Jes remembers. "But I knew I deserved better than I had been treating myself."

She continues, "I started to explore what I could do when I was relieved of some of the shame I had weighing me down my entire life."

She stopped blogging about the history of aluminum measuring spoons and did something much more vulnerable: She started writing about her road to recovery.

Her blog, The Militant Baker, became about everything from fashion photography — where she wore short dresses and swimsuits that she never would've dared to before — to political posts taking diet culture and fatphobia to task.

With a mix of vulnerability, humor, attitude, and unfiltered honesty, Jes's blog exploded in popularity, with media platforms like BBC, CNN, Time magazine, People magazine, and countless others featuring her work. But popularity was never the aim.

"For me, it's always about the power of liberation," she explains. "Freedom from any restrictions that others may push towards you. This includes freedom from subscribing to self-loathing and diet culture [and those who] have their own ideas about what that [liberation] should look like for you."

Jes says liberation is a journey — one that begins with giving ourselves permission to live life.

"Liberation is freedom from all outside expectations, even our own," she says. "Liberation is slowly learning how to become the best version of our whole selves."

Becoming our best selves can be an intimidating goal, though. That's why she has a few suggestions on where to start.

Diversifying who you follow on platforms like Instagram is one simple way to begin. "If we want our media feeds to represent real life (and ultimately show us that our body isn't strange, weird, or awful), we need to go out and actively find diverse images for ourselves," she writes.

Jes also advocates for gentleness. As she points out, the journey toward self-acceptance is difficult. "This is not the 'easy way out' in the slightest," she explains. "But just because it's not the easy way out doesn't mean it's not worth it."

Jes admits that sometimes she thinks dieting would be easier in a world that celebrates thin bodies. But if she's going to struggle, she'd rather work toward living her life on her own terms and not make her happiness dependent on something like size.

But it's not about loving her body all the time, either. Rather than doing a full 180 and forcing herself to feel one particular way, Jes found that not obsessing about her body at all — and finding a neutral, self-compassionate place — was most helpful in her journey.

"We used to want the three easiest ways to lose weight. When we reject that, we then start looking for the three easiest ways to love our bodies. It's totally natural," Jes says. "[But] asking someone to achieve body love can quickly become another unattainable prerequisite, much like the desire to change our body into what is deemed desirable."

"The real freedom lies in the gray area," she adds, "which is also the most difficult to sit in comfortably."

Jes unpacks all of this (and more) in her upcoming memoir "Landwhale." The title, which was once an insult used against her by online trolls, is now a source of pride.

Jes's journey shows that a simple idea — "I am enough" — can completely transform lives.

It's a powerful message that can touch people across communities, oceans, and even languages.

Jes was reminded of this power after a panel at that conference in Paris, when a man eagerly approached her to show off his new book. "I looked down and saw an entire section dedicated to the Abercrombie and Fitch campaign I had done years ago," Jes says. "I spoke little French and he didn't speak ANY English, but there was this moment of gratitude for and between both of us — it was humbling."

It's a message that Jes now hopes will come from new voices, too.

"[I want] to amplify marginalized voices that are far more important than my own through this platform," she says. She hopes that those coming up behind her will be a greater reflection of the diversity she sees in this movement.

She knows the road ahead won't be easy, but the right to live your life on your own terms is what ultimately makes it worth it. It's this kind of freedom that Jes keeps fighting for — not just for herself, but for every one of us.

"Trust yourself that you're doing the best you can and that it's enough," she tells me. "And if you ever need a cheerleader in your corner to remind you of this, I'm here for you."

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Brit shares the one-word 'dead giveaway' that American actors are doing an English accent

There's one word they never get right.

via Warner Bros Discovery

Peter Dinklage on "Game of Thrones?

When it comes to actors doing accents across the pond, some Americans are known for their great British accents, such as Natalie Portman ("The Other Boleyn Girl"), Robert Downey, Jr. ("Sherlock Homes"), and Meryl Streep ("The Iron Lady").

Some have taken a lot of heat for their cartoonish or just plain weird-sounding British accents, Dick Van Dyke ("Mary Poppins"), Kevin Costner ("Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves") and Keanu Reeves ("Bram Stoker's Dracula").

Some actors, such as Tom Hardy (“The Drop”) and Hugh Laurie (“House”), have American accents so good that people have no idea they are British.

Benedict Townsend, a London-based comedian and host of the “Scroll Deep” podcast, says there is one word that American actors playing characters with a British accent never get right. And no, it’s not the word “Schedule,” which British people pronounce the entire first 3 letters, and Americans boil down to 2. And it’s not “aluminum,” which British and American people seem to pronounce every stinking letter differently.

@benedicttown

The one word American actors aways get wrong when doing an English accent

What word do American actors always get wrong when they do British accents?

“There is one word that is a dead giveaway that an English character in a movie or a TV show is being played by an American. One word that always trips them up. And once you notice it, you can't stop noticing it,” Townsend says. “You would see this lot in ‘Game of Thrones’ and the word that would always trip them up was ‘daughter.’”

Townsend adds that when British people say “daughter,” they pronounce it like the word “door” or “door-tah.” Meanwhile, Americans, even when they are putting on a British accent, say it like “dah-ter.”

“So top tip if you are an actor trying to do an English accent, daughter like a door. Like you're opening a door,” Townsend says.



What word do British actors always get wrong when doing American accents?

Some American commenters returned the favor by sharing the word that British actors never get right when using American accents: “Anything.”

"I can always tell a Brit playing an American by the word anything. An American would say en-ee-thing. Brits say it ena-thing,” Dreaming_of_Gaea wrote. "The dead giveaway for English people playing Americans: ‘Anything.’ Brits always say ‘EH-nuh-thin,’” marliemagill added.

"I can always tell an actor is English playing an American when they say ‘anything.’ English people always say it like ‘enny-thin,’” mkmason wrote.



What is the cot-caught merger?

One commenter noted that the problem goes back to the cot-caught merger, when Americans in the western US and Canadians began to merge different sounds into one. People on the East Coast and in Britain pronounce them as different sounds.

“Depending on where you live, you might be thinking one of two things right now: Of course, ‘cot’ and ‘caught’ sound exactly the same! or There’s no way that ‘cot’ and ‘caught’ sound the same!” Laura McGrath writes at DoYouReadMe. “As a result, although the different spellings remain, the vowel sounds in the words cot/caught, nod/gnawed, stock/stalk are identical for some English speakers and not for others.”

American actors owe Townsend a debt of gratitude for pointing out the one thing that even the best can’t seem to get right. He should also give the commenters a tip of the cap for sharing the big word that British people have trouble with when doing an American accent. Now, if we could just get through to Ewan McGregor and tell him that even though he is fantastic in so many films, his American accent still needs a lot of work.

This article originally appeared last year.

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Health

Philosopher shares the subtle giveaway that someone is 'not very smart'

When you see this trait, it's time to rethink your relationship.

via Canva/Photos

A man pointing at someone.

Individuals and groups have used scapegoating to blame their problems on others since the term was first coined in The Old Testament and probably long before. We see it all the time in politics, where leaders blame specific groups or ideologies for their country’s failures. We also see it in personal relationships where families blame one person for everyone’s problems or workplaces make an employee the fall guy for a failed project.

In a viral TikTok video, philosopher Julian de Medeiros explains why scapegoating is a sign that someone is unintelligent. He begins by quoting one of the most powerful British union leaders in the first half of the 20th century, Ernest Bevin, who once said: “An unintelligent person is always looking for a scapegoat.”

What's a sign that someone is unintelligent?

“What he meant is that a sign that somebody is not very intelligent is that they always have to blame their problems on other people. Like, it's never something they've done; it's always somebody else's fault,” de Medeiros says in a video with over 230,000 views. “They can avoid accountability; they can avoid introspection and self-reflection, which means that they can avoid growth because it's always somebody else's fault. A smart person is introspective, self-critical, and wants to grow, but an unintelligent person blames other people.”

@julianphilosophy

Intelligent vs. unintelligent #quotes #life #intelligent #wisdom


It can be hard to come to grips with our failures in life, whether they are financial problems, relationship issues or fear of losing control. “There are things that we cannot bear to see about ourselves. ‘I really don’t want to be seen as vulnerable or stupid or weak or greedy,’” Deborah Stewart, a Jungian psychoanalyst, told The Washington Post. “I don’t have to deal with myself if I scapegoat if I blame. That’s the part that most people don’t really know — that they are trying to expel some of their very own feelings by putting them on others.”

People and groups that are made into scapegoats can be put into incredible danger or subject to public disgrace, whether it is the Jewish people during the Holocaust or Anne Boleyn during the reign of King Henry VIII, or Yoko Ono for the breakup of The Beatles.

The big problem with scapegoating.

Those who scapegoat others for their failures can be seen as unintelligent because they refuse to take responsibility for their actions or even recognize where they may have been wrong. When people point their fingers at others, they also ensure that they never learn from their problems and are bound to repeat them. Intelligent people have a growth mindset, and scapegoating is the exact opposite.

Further, when societies refuse to look at the real causes of their problems and instead blame them on scapegoats, they will fail to progress. However, it’s very easy for leaders to fall into the scapegoat trap because it prevents them from being responsible and appears to solve problems when they are actually taking the easy way out.

Ultimately, it comes down to a core question: do you want to deflect blame for your problems by scapegoating someone else, or do you want to accept responsibility and grow from your difficulties? Ironically, those who scapegoat may think it makes their lives easier. However, living a life making the same mistakes repeatedly is a lot harder than accepting responsibility.

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Joy

Adorable Golden Retriever absolutely loses it when he runs into his vet at a bar

No one has ever been this excited to see their doctor.

@cosmo_andtheoddparents/TikTok

He wuvs his vet.

Not every dog might jump with joy after seeing their vet out in public. But for Cosmo the Golden Retriever, it was practically Christmas all over again when he spotted his own vet, Dr. Jones, at a brewery.

In an adorable clip posted to TikTok, we see Cosmo in pure, unadulterated bliss as he snuggles with an equally happy Dr. Jones, who, considering he’s still in his scrubs, might have just gotten out of work to grab a quick pint.

Watch:

@cosmo_andtheoddparents When you run into your vet in public #goldenretrieversoftiktok #vetlife #animallovers #petparents #goldenretriever #goldenretrievers #doglife #dogmom #dailyfluff #charlestondogs #doglover #charlestondog #brewerydog ♬ original sound - Cosmo

Ugh, the cuteness is too much to handle! People in the comments could barely contain their secondhand joy.

“He looked over like, “Mom, do you see who this is?” one person wrote, while another said, “What in the Hallmark movie? Adorable!!”

One person even joked, “Did we all check the vet’s hand for a wedding ring? (Said as a married woman. Looking out for you all, or something.)”

According to Hannah Dweikat, Cosmo’s owner, the two actually share quite a history. She tells Upworthy that when Cosmo was but a wee pup, he “gave a scare” after eating a Sago Palm seed, which are highly toxic to dogs, from a plant in their backyard, which of course resulted in him being rushed to the animal hospital and staying there over the weekend.

While that’s every pet owner’s worst nightmare, and certainly a scary situation for the poor fur baby, Dweikat says that “the calm and patient demeanor” of Dr. Jones and his staff put Cosmo at ease. And because of this, “Cosmo has always loved going to see his friends—especially because they give him lots of treats and snuggles.”

Cosmo and Dr. Jones’ buddyship has also blossomed thanks to proximity, as Dweikat only lives down the street from the clinic. “Which means we get to see Dr. Jones and his staff out in public at times and Cosmo takes every chance he can get to say hi,” she explains. This time, however, she was able to capture it all on video. Yay for us!

What makes a good vet?

While not every vet, however gifted, will be able to elicit this type of reaction from their patients, having a calming presence like Dr. Jones is certainly a good sign for pet owners to be on the lookout for when shopping around for their own vet. But that’s not the only quality a good vet needs. According to Saint Matthews University, a vet also needs to have high stamina (both physically and mentally), as well as an ability to tolerate unpleasant situations (you can’t faint at the sight of blood or vomit), a high level of emotional intelligence (maybe all doctors should possess this skill, but especially those who work with animals), adaptability, a sense of enthusiasm, and finally, excellent communication skills.

Dr. Jones seems to have these attributes in spades, and his patients clearly love him for it. None so much as Cosmo, obviously.

By the way, if you’re in need of even more content featuring this precious pup, you can follow Cosmo on both TikTok and Instagram.

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Music

Resurfaced clip shows Cranberries singer Dolores O'Riordan's performing Fleetwood Mac cover

Who's ready for a Fleetwood snack?

@oldmansrock/Instagram

Truly a once in a lifetime talent.

When we think of badass, alt rock icons of the 90s, few are as singular and unique as Dolores O’Riordan, who gave The Cranberries its signature sound, and who was once described as having"the voice of a saint trapped in a glass harp.”

It wasn’t just that O’Riordan flawlessly blended traditional Celtic singing techniques like lilting and keening into rock music (which in itself is an amazing feat) but that her performances never compromised emotional authenticity for the sake of aesthetics. The result, as any fan will tell you, was something both ethereal and raw all at the same time.

So it should probably be of no surprise that in this resurfaced clip, presumably from the late 90s, O’Riordan’s stunning cover of Fleetwood Mac’s “Go Your Own Way” is every bit as magical. As @oldmansrock, the account that posted the video, wrote, “the way that Dolores could challenge the pitch but still stay on key, that is the mark of an accomplished singer.

It sounds dissonant compared to the manufactured material of today, where every tone is perfect, but hers is oh so human, and so very Irish! It is beautiful!”

But don’t just take their word for it. Watch:

If this had you wanting to pull up a Cranberries playlist on your Spotify to listen to for the rest of the day, you're not alone. Down in the comments, the renewed love for O’’Riordan was palpable.

“What sits deep with me is that no one sounds like her. Her voice is unmistakable. Whatever her take on a song/lyric? It was authentically, soul-touching Dolores.

“She was unbelievably talented and the cranberries are criminally underrated.”

“Her Irish vocal sweep ups are amazing.”

“She was just brilliant!!! Incredibly talented as well as a lovely and kind human being. I love and miss her. I don't know how anyone can have a bad word to say about this. I thought it was brilliant, both her live cover and studio cover. I wish people weren't so stubborn. I can accept covers no problem if the singer is talented enough, and she most certainly is. ❤️”

“A keening Irish queen. Her voice will always stir me.”

“An actual once in a generation talent”

“Also a master of the microphone. She knows exactly where the sweet spot is for every note.”

“She could melt your heart with that voice, or completely blow you away. Missed dearly, but never forgotten ❤️”

This cover would go on to be a part to the Cranberries’ third album, To The Faithful Departed, which was released in 1996 and became the band’s highest-charting album on the US Billboard 200, and was praised for its darker tone as well as its themes of grief and loss.

After O’Riordan died from drowning due to alcohol intoxication in January 2018, the Cranberries would disband in 2019, but they released their final album, In the End, that year. It was comprised of some of O'Riordan's unfinished demo tapes.

While O’Riordan met the same tragic fate that befalls many artists, especially those in the music industry, her spirit lives on in her art. Because she put so much of herself into her craft, even bite-sized clips of her performances, many years later, inspire those who listen to it. That’s something worth celebrating.

By the way, you can catch a full video of the cover below.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

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A poet wrote about meeting her younger self for coffee and launched cathartic viral trend

Women are creating healing "I met my younger self for coffee" poems as they reflect on how far they've come.

Photo credit: Canva

If you could meet your younger self for coffee, what would you say?

Life is complex and our feelings about our lives even moreso, which is why we humans so often turn to art as a means of processing it all. Poetry in particular has the power to distill complexity into a beautifully simple form, allowing us to succinctly express feelings that are difficult to describe. As Robert Frost wrote, "Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words," and a skilled poet can help us all find words for our own thoughts and emotions.

A poem by Jennae Cecelia from her upcoming book "Deep in My Feels" has kicked off a viral wave of poetic expression as women reflect on how they've grown and changed since they were younger. Cecelia's poem begins, "i met my younger self for coffee at 10:15," and goes on to describe a lovely, compassionate interaction with her younger self, all while contrasting that younger self with the woman she has become.

People loved the poem so much they used it as inspiration for their own "meeting my younger self for coffee" writing exercises, and the various iterations, at once so personal yet universal, have taken TikTok and Instagram by storm. Some are just written on blank backgrounds as images. Others are videos with the poem overlaid and music in the background.

But what they share in common is the sentiment of wanting to let our younger selves know it was going to be okay. That life is hard but there are good things coming around the corner. That whatever she's feeling or going through now will someday just be a memory.

Some poems have come from women who are still young but fully adult now, speaking to their teen selves.

@jasbethany_

I’d do anything to talk to my 15 year old self 🥲 #nostalgia #coffee #youngerself

Others come from moms in the thick of parenting, reassuring their younger selves that their dreams of having a family have come true, while others show that they took a different path than they planned and it turned out fine.

@katrice_taylor

🤎 #imetmyoungerselfforcoffee #momtok #momsoftiktok #blackmomsoftiktok

The trend is moving people to tears, offering hope to people who are still in those uncertain younger self years, when the possibilities of life seem endless and yet so much feels impossible. Many are finding solace in seeing people's before and after stories, as they serve as a reminder that life is malleable, that the future isn't set in stone, that people can endure and overcome.

@puffy817

Why did this trend heal a little bit in me while I wrote it IB: @Jennae Cecelia Poetry #coffeewithmyyoungerself #parati

Many resonate with the message that whatever struggles we're dealing with now we likely won't be in the future. And, of course, there will always be new struggles we're dealing with but with age and experience we hopefully learn about our own strength to endure. We also hopefully still have dreams to catch.

Cecelia says she is glad that her poem has inspired so many people to create their own versions of it, adding a rightful request to be credited for her work. She shares that the poem is part of a new collection of poetry that she describes as "a dream come true." Her previous poetry books have been self-published, but for this book she landed a deal with a publisher and is thrilled by the idea of having her book available in bookstores and not just online.

"This book is personal" Cecelia says. "It’s a reflection of love, loss, growth, and all the emotions we’re sometimes afraid to name. It’s a reminder that vulnerability isn’t just okay—it’s necessary. Inside, you’ll find poems that sit with you in life’s highs and lows, including the one about, 'meeting your younger self for coffee'—a favorite in the collection."

You can find "Deep in My Feels" for pre-order on Amazon and you can learn more about Cecelia and her work at jennaececelia.com.

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