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A photographer mom shoots portraits of girls in sparkly dresses and sports equipment because YES

It's already been shared 175,000 times. ❤️❤️❤️

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HMP Couture Imagery

Some of the HMP Couture sports models



This one's for the girls who know you don't have to chose between sparkles and sports.

For too long, girls have been sent the message that they have to be either/or. You're either a girly-girl or a tomboy. You're either into sparkly princesses or sports practices. From the early days of childhood, we're told in bold and subtle ways to squeeze ourselves into separate boxes.

But those boxes are bullspit, and most of us know it. Girls don't have to choose between feeling beautiful and being badass. We can be both at the same time.

Perhaps that's why a portrait shoot shared by HMP Couture Imagery showing girls dressed up in fancy dresses andsports equipment has gone insanely viral. The shoot is called "Because you can do it all," and in just a few days it has already been shared 175,000+ times.

The woman who photographed the shoot says a comment from a fellow mom sparked the idea.

Heather Mitchell, the photographer from Alabama who runs HMP Couture Imagery, told Upworthy how the portrait shoot came about.

"My youngest daughter is 8 and she is trying softball this year for the first time," said Mitchell. "We were at practice a few weeks ago and I was talking with the other moms. I was saying that I hoped Paislee learned to love the game because she was athletic. One of the moms told me that she was not athletic, that she was a girly-girl."

"I couldn't sleep that night," Mitchell continued. "All I could think was, 'Why does she have to choose?' I played every sport my school offered and wore lipstick to every game. So the next day we went to the studio and created her shot."

Mitchell says she only spent about three minutes shooting because she knew exactly what she wanted to create. After she posted the photos of Paislee to her personal Facebook page, she got a ton of requests from other parents for the same kind of shoot. After adding two days to the schedule, they sold out in an hour—and the requests just keep on coming.


Mitchell hopes that girls see these photos and realize that they don't have to choose one identity.

The idea that crinoline and cleats can't exist in the same mental space is silly, but common. Girls (and boys for that matter) can love pretty things and kick butt at sports. They don't have to be one thing or the other.

"My parent taught me that I could be anything I wanted growing up," Mitchell told Upworthy. "I didn't realize till I was much older that everyone is not that blessed."

These photos are an excellent reminder to questions our assumptions and not place unnecessary limits on anyone—and an empowering example for girls who don't fit neatly into a socially constructed box.

"I hope that every little girl that sees this series can see that there is no box," says Mitchell. "Whatever their dreams are they can achieve."


This article originally appeared on 4.17.19


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A guy definitively listed the 12 things that make men happy and it's 100% accurate

Guys literally only want one thing and it's a cool stick.

Nolan Reid / TikTok

There's an old joke slash meme that goes something like this:

"Guys literally only want one thing and it's disgusting."

Its used to imply, obviously, that men are shallow and crude creatures.

TikTok creator and simple-life advocate Nolan Reid, however, has a different idea of what men really want.


Nolan recently made a video about "Little things in life that make men happy."

The hilarious list includes:

  • A fridge full of beer.
  • Drinking said beer in the garage. With your dog. And a good buddy.
  • Finding a cool stick.
  • Kicking a rock.
  • Staring at water.
  • Dropping rocks into said water.

As a fellow man, I would say: Yeah. That pretty much covers it.

It really doesn't take much! Watch Nolan's full video to see the rest, and just appreciate how much joy and satisfaction he gets from these simple thing.

People loved Nolan's list – so much so that they began adding their own ideas of "simple things men love."

The video racked up hundreds of thousands of views across TikTok and Instagram.

One commenter wrote, "He just described my whole personality." Another added, "This guy gets it."

Others chimed in with their own additions to the list, like staring at a fire for hours. Or just peace and quiet.

But most of the nearly 200 comments were just people chiming in to say one thing:

"Hell yeah."

Finally, someone who understands us.

Nolan's ultra-relaxed vision of "masculinity" is honestly so refreshing.

Men on social media are usually bombarded with the Andrew Tates and Jordan Petersons of the world, influencers who constantly berate us to make more money, lose weight and add muscle, sleep with more women, take charge, relentlessly self-improve.

I like Nolan's much chiller idea of masculinity. It reminds me of being a kid, taking pleasure in the simple things, not racing to be anywhere, not trying to impress anyone or prove anything.

Nolan's entire account is a breath of fresh air, an antidote to hustle culture. His videos find joy in:

  • Breaking down cardboard boxes
  • Driving at sunset
  • Going fishing
  • Throwing a frisbee
  • Wearing t-shirts
A daily visit to his page is almost like a meditation. I highly recommend giving him a follow to add a little counterprogramming to your social media feed.

Nolan says in another recent video that he started making TikToks and Instagram reels just for fun, but discovered along the way that he was really passionate about the message.

"I never thought that my simple living and love for little things would resonate with so many of you."

He said he hopes to inspire people to "take a step back and enjoy the good simple things in life."

I suddenly have the urge to go chuck a rock into a river, so I would say: Mission Accomplished!

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Here's a simple and effective test to figure out how you really feel about someone

It involves two beers, a puppy, and your personal comfort level.

via Unsplash

The average American knows 600 people, according to a recent study by The New York Times. Now, you may have 900 "friends" on Facebook, but you probably don't "know" all of them.

Another study found that the average American adult has 16 friends. They have "three friends for life, five people they really like and would hang out with one-on-one, and eight people they like but don't spend time with one-on-one or seek out."

Now, there are all different kinds of friends. There are those that you see just to have a good time. There are those that you go out with on couples' dates. And there are those you may share a hobby or interest with, but the relationship doesn't go much further than that.

What sets acquaintances, friends, and best friends apart is how comfortable we feel around them. Two ways to judge how they make you feel is whether you spending a lot of time together and if they can be trusted.

Author Ross McCammon created a simple test to gain some clarity about the level of comfort he feels about someone, he calls it the "Two Beers and a Puppy Test."

The test is: To find out how you actually feel about someone, ask yourself: "Would I have two beers with this person?" And: "Would I allow this person to look after my puppy over a weekend?"

Some people are no and no. These people are to be avoided at all costs. Some people are yes and no. These people are to be cautiously trusted. Some people are no and yes. These people are no fun but they make the world a better place — for puppies, especially. And some people are yes and yes. These people are wonderful people and your life and work are better for having them in your life. Seek them out. Collaborate with them. Enjoy their company.

No, No — This is probably someone who shouldn't be in your life. You don't enjoy their company and they're not someone that you can rely on when you need someone to lend a hand.

No, Yes — Unfortunately, this person isn't that great of a hang, but they can be relied upon in a pinch. These are great people to have as neighbors.

Yes, No — These people are a lot of fun, but you can't depend on them to be there when you really need them. These are like drinking buddies.

Yes, Yes — These are the golden people that you should work to keep in your life.

The test is a great way to evaluate people in your life but it's also a way to look at ourselves. How would you rate yourself as a friend?

via Wikimedia Commons

Another fun way to evaluate people is a test I developed based on a quote by Oscar Wilde, the legendary 19th-century Irish poet, playwright, and author of "The Picture of Dorian Gray."

"It is absurd to divide people into good and bad. People are either charming or tedious," Wilde once said.

Now, this test is more for those who aren't shopping around from someone to watch their puppy but want to find people who are the most enjoyable to spend time around. I picture it as a spectrum with charming on one side and tedious on the other.

Charming < ------------------------- > Tedious

Someone can have a great sense of humor and make you laugh (charming) but at the same time like to complain a whole lot (tedious). So they'd fall in the middle.

There are others who are nothing but a joy to be around and are self-aware enough not to impose their drama or neurotic tendencies on you. These people would fall on the charming end of the spectrum.

Then they are those people who bring little to the table in terms of good humor and likeability but have a whole lot of baggage. These people would be ranked further down the tedious scale.

To put things even more simply, as Wilde once said, "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go."


This article originally appeared on 12.21.20

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High school salutatorian's Goth yearbook photo is going viral for the best reasons

Smart look.

via Jules Lipoff / Twitter

Back in April 2021, then-17-year-old Weronika Jachimowiczv got a lot of attention for subverting people's expectations of who excels in high school. And that's exactly what she wanted.

Jachimowicz was named New York's Mattituck-Cutchogue Union Free School District's 2021 salutatorian. Her yearbook photo next to valedictorian Luke Altman is going viral because of her dramatic Goth makeup and attire.

It all started when assistant professor and writer Dr. Jules Lipoff tweeted out a photo of the valedictorian and salutatorian he saw in a newspaper and it went viral. How many salutatorians have you seen that wear pentagram hoop earrings, a choker, and black devil horns?

The juxtaposition of her next to the bowtie-wearing Altman, makes the photo even more amusing.

Jachimowicz wanted the world to know that just because a high school kid looks like an outsider, doesn't mean they aren't interested in academics or sports.

In fact, it's completely normal for kids who are interested in the Goth subculture to be good students.

"The scene has quiet middle-class values — education, highbrow culture, theatre, museums, romantic literature, poetry, philosophy, Gothic architecture," Dr. Dunja Bril, who studies Goth culture in England, told The Independent.

"Many Goths like classical music. It's a status symbol to have a good collection of classical pieces — mostly requiems and darker pieces," she added.

"Going to do a university degree is encouraged," Bril continued. "It doesn't encourage people to drop out of school. Whereas in the Punk scene you turn down the normal educational values, in Goth you gain status if you're perceived as being educated. You get people who are in it for the shock value, but they are usually the ones who grow out of it."


Since her photo went viral, Jachimowicz has received countless messages of thanks from young people who say she's inspired them to express themselves.

"In all honesty, that's all I wanted. I wanted to help anyone I could who is struggling with expressing themselves because I've been in the exact same position," Jachimowicz told Yahoo. "When people message me telling me how I have given them the confidence to be who they truly are, I almost cry from happiness."

Jachimowicz says that she was able to be herself because she was encouraged by others, so this is her chance to pay it forward.

"I was always trying to please others and be like what everyone else wanted me to be, or at least try to fit into what was 'normal.' However, I did slowly start to realize that it's OK to be different," she said.

"I've met people in my life who gave me the confidence to fully be myself," she added.

In addition to having an unweighted GPA of 97.27%, Jachimowicz was on the fencing, ping pong, and winter track teams. She was also a member of the National Honor Society, Students Against Drunk Driving, and the Unity Club.

She plans to major in biology/forensics in college.

Jachimowicz's accomplishments are another reason to never judge someone for how they look or their interests. Just because someone is wearing satanic earrings doesn't mean they aren't highly intelligent or athletic.

She believes the most important thing is to be yourself, regardless of what anyone else thinks.

"Even if others don't really like my style, it's what makes me happy and I've worked hard to finally come to that conclusion," she said.


This article originally appeared on 4.12.21

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Therapist analyzes male 'Megamind' characters to explain why women reject 'nice guys'

"Nice Guy Syndrome" is a thing.

CinemaTherapy/YouTube

Nice isn't the same as good.

Have you ever heard a guy complain that women seem to reject them a lot, despite the fact that they're a nice guy? There may be multiple reasons for that, but if it happens a lot, "Nice Guy Syndrome" might be at play.

To illustrate Nice Guy Syndrome, licensed therapist Jonathan Decker and filmmaker Alan Seawright analyzed the male characters and how the primary love interest responded to them in the animated film "Megamind." Decker and Seawright use films to explore mental health and human behavior in their show "Cinema Therapy," which has 1.7 million followers on YouTube. Their breakdown of "Megamind" and Nice Guy Syndrome is one of their most popular episodes, which is a testament who how relatable it is.

After discussing how criminally underrated "Megamind" is as a film—so funny, with incredible writing and performances—Decker and Seawright dive into what makes the characters Hal (played by Jonah Hill) and Megamind (played by Will Ferrell) good examples of the difference between "nice guys" and "good guys." Both of these characters fall for Roxanne (played by Tina Fey) but only one of them proves worthy of her in the end. (Hint: It's not the nice guy.)

via GIPHY

Hal may be awkward, but he's "nice" in that he treats Roxanne well, at least on the surface. He's always doing things for her and complimenting her, trying to win her affections. But his niceness is transactional; he wants something from her and thinks being nice to her will eventually get it for him. He's not being nice for its own sake. When he gains superpowers and becomes "Titan," he assumes that Roxanne will want him, and we see how he feels entitled to her. He doesn't respect what she wants—in fact, he thinks she's delusional and that he needs to convince her that she should be with him.

Hal is "nice" but he's not good. Megamind is the opposite. Megamind starts off as a villain in the film, but as the story progresses, we see how he ended up in that position and how his true nature is actually good.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

"This is not a story of a villain reforming," Decker says. "He was always destined to be the hero, but he wasn't really given a chance to be. And that's one thing that I find really powerful about the story is this notion that I want to be good, but people won't let me. Or I want to be good, or because of certain things about me, people don't see who I really am."

"There's a difference between niceness and goodness," Decker says. "Goodness is for its own sake. And giving love is not the same thing as expecting it in return."

He then explains how "good" and "nice" mean different things when it comes to what you want for and from the other person.

"Good is I want you to be happy," he says. "It doesn't have to be with me. I would be thrilled if it was, but doesn't have to be with me. And also, I respect your right to make the choices you're going to make. Nice is not only are you making the wrong choice in being with that other guy, you should be with me. Nice lacks confidence and is looking for someone else to give it to them."

Decker shared that he speaks from experience on this topic, as he himself went through a phase of being a "nice guy," questioning why the women he was interested in always went for good-looking jerks when they should have been interested in him. It wasn't until someone felt entitled to his affections because she was good to him that he saw how terrible that felt on the receiving end.

via GIPHY

People in the comments loved the analysis and shared some thoughts of their own:

"Megamind’s 'villainy' is really just elaborate, over-the-top theatrics and we never even see anyone actually get hurt during them. Whereas, superpowers aside, Hal is the kind of villain that can and does exist in real life, and it makes him so much scarier."

"Megamind is a story about facades. Megamind created his evil persona as a way to push people away to hide how vulnerable he really is, whereas Hal created his nice guy persona to camouflage how despicable he is in an attempt to lure people closer."

"The interesting part to me is how Roxanne was always so kind to Hal despite his awkwardness and his selfishness. She was never dismissive or rude to him. Even in that tower scene where she's trying to explain to him what's going on, she never once raises her voice or gets impatient with him, it's him who gets worked up with her. And that's such a perfect depiction of real life. You can be so kind, and so polite, and it doesn't matter, because if someone has decided you owe them something, they're going to be angry at you just for existing if they don't get it."

"I like the part when Titan brings Roxanne the flowers. It shows how little he actually cares for her. He says he knows everything about her and then immediately after he says he doesn't know what kind of flowers she likes. He likes the idea of being with her but doesn't actually like her enough to learn about her."

Unfortunately, many women have had experience with "nice guys" who are not actually "good guys," and it's often not that hard to spot the difference. But the bottom line is that being good for goodness' sake will always be more attractive than being nice solely in order to get a woman's attention or win her affections.

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Pop Culture

Real life hero LeVar Burton was just awarded the National Humanities Medal

From Reading Rainbow to Star Trek, Burton’s impact on literacy and culture is celebrated at the White House.

Super Festivals from Ft. Lauderdale

Actor LeVar Burton, recent winner of the National Humanities Medal

Anyone paying attention would have long ago concluded that LeVar Burton is a national treasure, and President Joe Biden just made it official. Burton, best known for his roles in Roots, Reading Rainbow, and Star Trek: The Next Generation, was recently awarded the National Humanities Medal. Recognized for his contributions to promoting literacy and advancing the cultural landscape, Burton accepted the prestigious honor during a private ceremony at the White House. As his shipmate, Mr. Worf, might say, "It is a great honor."

Burton’s wife, Stephanie Cozart Burton, shared her excitement on social media. She posted on X:

"Proud of my hubby ❤️ We just left the Oval Office where President Biden awarded him the medal of Excellence in Humanities for the work he’s done in the field of literature and expression in arts. He’s the best of us. 💋 "

— @StephanieCozartBurton

This recognition is just one of many highlights in Burton's extraordinary career, which spans more than four decades of work in education, film, and television.

Why LeVar Burton's influence matters

LeVar Burton has made a significant impact on multiple generations. As the host of Reading Rainbow for 23 years, he encouraged children to explore new ideas through books. The show earned 12 Daytime Emmy Awards and a Peabody Award, becoming a crucial tool for promoting literacy. Fans remember Reading Rainbow fondly, with many crediting Burton for their love of reading.



Reddit user @Mariner4LifetilDeath shared:

"I would watch his show and run to the library to check all the featured books out!"

— @Mariner4LifetilDeath

Through his work on Reading Rainbow, Burton made reading accessible, engaging, and fun, sparking a lifelong love for books in many of his viewers.

An inspiring career, from Reading Rainbow to Star Trek

Beyond Reading Rainbow, Burton is widely known for his role as Geordi La Forge in Star Trek: The Next Generation and his portrayal of Kunta Kinte in the critically acclaimed series RootsRoots. His ability to take on such diverse roles while remaining a steadfast advocate for education has made him a cultural icon.

One Reddit user, u/rtsarecool, put Burton among other greats:

"Well deserved! Right up there with the other wholesome greats like Mr. Rogers, and Bob Ross."

— u/Ortsarecool

LeVar Burton’s warmth, kindness, and commitment to storytelling resonate with people of all ages. He has expanded his influence with LeVar Burton Reads, a podcast aimed at adults, which has been downloaded more than 25 million times. For many, this podcast serves as a continuation of the magic of Reading Rainbow but is tailored to a more mature audience.

via GIPHY

A legacy of excellence and cultural enrichment

LeVar Burton’s influence extends far beyond his television roles. In addition to his National Humanities Medal, Burton’s accolades include a Grammy Award for his spoken word album Aftermath, three NAACP Awards, and 13 Emmy Awards. His other achievements include the Fred Rogers Award and the Inamori Prize for Ethics in Entertainment.

One Reddit user, @SereneVega, summed up Burton’s impact beautifully:

"LeVar Burton, Fred Rogers, and Jim Henson raised American children better than 99% of actual parents. LeVar deserves every accolade and more."

— @SereneVega

Burton’s dedication to storytelling and education has made him a beloved figure in American culture. As the recipient of the National Humanities Medal, he joins an elite group whose work has expanded the nation's understanding of literature, history, and the human experience. His lifelong advocacy for literacy will continue to shape future generations, just as it has for decades.

Burton’s trek is far from over

While Burton has received numerous honors, he remains as active as ever in the entertainment and education sectors. His recent launch of the LeVar Burton Book Club and continued podcasting show his commitment to fostering a love for reading and learning in people of all ages.


via GIPHY

Whether it’s his work on screen or his commitment to promoting literacy, Burton has inspired millions, proving that one person truly can make the world a better place. His recognition with the National Humanities Medal is a testament to his lifelong passion for education and cultural enrichment. Here’s to many more years of inspiring future generations to take a look—because it’s all in a book.

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