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A Girl Scouts psychologist wrote a guide for parents to discuss body image. It rocks.

"Yes, Your Daughter Just Called Herself Fat," is a must-read.

girsl scouts, body image, body image young girls, parents
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What a fabulous resource

The Girl Scouts' guide to help parents talk to their daughters about weight and body image is kind of amazing.


The guide, titled "Yes, Your Daughter Just Called Herself Fat," written by Girl Scouts’ developmental psychologist, Andrea Bastiani Archibald, includes a step-by-step look at responding to your child should they come home one day from school saying, "I'm fat."

First of all, it breaks down just how prevalent fat-shaming is in our culture:

"According to studies, a whopping 80 percent of 10-year-olds are afraid of being fat. Why? Because they’re constantly surrounded by both subtle and direct messages that curvier or heavier girls aren’t as well liked, aren’t as likely to succeed in business, and in general, aren’t going to have as much fun or happiness in their lives."

Second of all, it explains why the knee-jerk response "You're not fat. You're beautiful!" that so many of us have actually isn't helpful.

Honestly, this part is so good that I'm just going to include the whole thing (which in its own awesome way, features the only reference to "The Dress" that won't make you want to scream):

"[I]f she really sees her body in a certain way, simply telling her to stop seeing it that way isn’t going to help much. Remember that infamous dress on social media a few years back that some people thought was blue and some thought was gold—and how frustrating it was when those who saw it differently insisted that you were seeing it wrong and tried to get you to see it their way? That’s kind of how your girl is going to feel when you tell her that her body simply isn’t the way she thinks it is.
...by essentially telling her that she's not fat, she's pretty, you're reinforcing the idea that fatter, rounder, curvier or heavier bodies aren't beautiful — which simply isn't true. There are endless ways to be beautiful, and your daughter will grow up with a much healthier relationship to her body if you teach her that in a genuine way from a young age."

This is such an important message that we don't hear often enough. Calling someone fat isn't bad because being fat is inherently bad, but it is bad to call someone fat as an insult because it implies that there's something wrong with larger bodies.

Fat is just another type of body, andall types of bodies are OK.

The guide also features some great steps parents can take if their daughters feel negatively about their body fat.

1. Don't assume you know where she's coming from.

"A better approach is to pause for a moment and ask your daughter why she thinks she’s fat," the guide advises. "Is it because her clothes are fitting differently than they used to or that a size she used to wear doesn’t feel comfortable anymore?"

Maybe her discomfort has to do more with the bodies of her classmates or what she's seeing in the media. Or maybe she is fat, and really just needs you to tell her that's OK too. Getting to the root of what's causing body image issues is an important first step.

Again, the guide warns against those knee-jerk reactions: "If she says she thinks her legs are bigger or her tummy is rounder than those of her friends, those may actually be correct observations — and there’s nothing wrong with acknowledging that."

2. Set a good example for her!

Kids pick things up from their parents all the time and internalize those messages even if parents aren't trying to pass them on. This is just as much about setting a good example as anything else.

"Another reason your girl might call herself fat is because she’s heard you do the same to yourself," reads the guide. "Your daughter listens to everything you say — and if you’re picking yourself apart in front of the mirror or complaining about your weight, there’s a good chance that she’ll follow in your self-disparaging footsteps."

That means giving yourself a bit of a break too. Just as you don't want her to have to try to live up to unrealistic beauty standards, remind yourself that you don't have to either.

"Identify parts of your body that serve you well and make note of the things you really do love about the way you look," says the guide. "Healthy habits like eating right and exercise are good for everyone and should be a daily part of your routine, but fixating on your body and how it could or should be different isn’t healthy for anyone."

3. Pay attention to the kind of media she's consuming and make sure she's seeing a variety of body types being celebrated.

TV, movies, and advertising are chock-full of messages meant to instill shame around body appearance, especially in girls and women. A bit of emotional counterprograming can go a long way. For example, check out the upcoming children's book "Glitter Stripes"; and for older girls, Hulu's "My Mad Fat Diary," Melissa McCarthy's performance in "Ghostbusters," and Chrissie Metz in "This Is Us," and Lynn Champlin on "My Crazy Ex-Girlfriend" are great body-positive/fat-positive representations in the media.

Video of plus-size blogger posted on Girl Scouts Twitter page below:

The guide advises parents to "go the extra mile to compensate for some of the less-healthy messages your daughter may be getting from other sources" by exposing them to accomplished women of all shapes and sizes.

"She needs to know you don’t have to be a certain size or shape to make it big in life."

This guide is just one of the many phenomenal parenting resources you can find on the Girl Scouts website.

Other topics include how to raise your children to be leaders, how to stand up to bullying, and how to be the best they can be in school. They're all great in their own ways, but the body image article stands out especially.

Thanks to the Girl Scouts, parents can now feel equipped to handle this potentially difficult conversation.

This article originally appeared on 06.19.17

When 6-year-old Blake Rajahn shows up to his first grade classroom on Monday, he will arrive bearing an uplifting a message for his fellow students.

Blake's mother, Nikki Rajahn, runs a custom personalization business in Fayette County, Georgia, and she asked her son what kind of t-shirt he wanted for his first day of school. He could have chosen anything—his favorite sports star's number, a cool dragon, a witty saying—anything he wanted, she could make.


Blake chose something unexpected—an orange t-shirt with a simple, sweet message for the other kids at his school to see. Five little words that might just mean the world to someone who reads them.

"I will be your friend."

Ouch. My heart.

Rajahn shared the story on her business Facebook page:

"I have to brag on my son. I told him that as a back to school gift, I will make him any shirt he would like. It could have anything—a basketball theme, football, etc. which are all his favorites. He thought a while and said, 'will you please make me a shirt that says "I will be your friend" for all the kids who need a friend to know that I am here for them?' Never underestimate your kid's heart for others! I love my sweet Blake! #stopbullying"







Apparently, such a gesture is typical of Blake. "He has always had a heart for others and is very genuine," his mother told Upworthy. She said she's donating part of the proceeds of her t-shirt sales to the Real Life Center, a non-profit that helps families in need in Tyrone, Georgia, all because of Blake.

"During the summer we had a vacation Bible school that he went to," she said, "and they did a toothbrush and toothpaste drive for the Real Life Center. He came home saying we needed to go to the Dollar Store to get some that night. We told him we would go the next day, but he had to use his money for it. He said that was fine, so we asked how much he would like to spend. He said, 'It's for people who don't have any, right?' We said yes, so he very matter-of-fact said, 'Well all of it!' And he did!"

Rajahn said everyone has been very encouraging and people are starting to order their own version of the t-shirt with "#blakesfriends" added to it.

She also shared Blake's reaction to hearing that his shirt idea was starting to spread on Facebook—and again, it's just the sweetest darn thing.

"Ever since I posted about my son and his shirt, I have sold some and told Blake about it. He said, "Oh good! Now more and more people are going to have more and more friends!" He is just so flattered so many want to be his twin too 😊"

Sometimes all a person needs is one friend so they won't feel alone, and Blake going out of his way to make sure kids feel welcomed by him is an example even adults can learn from. If we all reached out to people who might be shy or who might feel excluded, and let them know in some small way that we are open to being friends, what a better world we could build.

Thank you, Blake, for bringing some much-needed sunshine into our day.


This article originally appeared on 8.2.19

Can we bring back some 50s fridge features, please?

There are very few things that would make people nostalgic for the 1950s. Sure, they had cool cars and pearl necklaces were a staple, but that time frame had its fair share of problems, even if "Grease" made it look dreamy. Whether you believe your life would've been way more interesting if you were Danny Zuko or not, most would agree their technology was...lacking.

All eras are "advanced" for their time, but imagine being dropped off in the 50s as someone from the year 2023. A recent post by Historic Vids on Twitter of a 1956 commercial advertising a refrigerator, however, has some people thinking that when it came to fridges, maybe they were living in the year 2056. I don't typically swoon over appliances, yet this one has me wondering where I can purchase a refrigerator like this.

Of course, there's no fancy touch screen that tells you the weather and asks how you'd like your ice cubed.

It's got more important features that are actually practical.


Like a fruit drawer that not only pulls down so you can quickly check your inventory, but also pulls completely out.

"A big picture window hydrator for fruits and vegetables," the actress says while demonstrating. "It tilts down to show you your supply at a glance, and it also lifts out, so you can take it over to the sink when there's a fresh supply to be washed and put away."

Yeah, that could be helpful and reduce the clutter in your fridge from all those clear storage bins companies designed to essentially do the same thing but maybe in a more cumbersome way. But the cool factor of the vintage refrigerator didn't stop there. You know how sometimes it's like playing Jenga removing leftovers?

Well, this fridge has shelves that slide out nearly completely.

Oh, the amount of reduced stress that would give folks sneaking a late snack after a holiday meal.

Watch the fascinating video below:

One commenter said, "Can we vote to bring this back?" and I have to agree. Take my money.

For a little extra fun, check out the full commercial below and marvel not only at the refrigerator but at how our attention spans for advertisements have diminished over the decades.

This story originally appeared on 5.3.23

Julian Worsham gets a new cart.

Six-year-old Julian Worsham of Beaverton, Oregon is like a lot of other first-graders: he loves Super Mario and Taekwondo. But he has achondroplasia, the most common form of dwarfism, and goes to a school that wasn't built for kids his height.

"He's born into a world that just, in some ways, is not built for him," Julian's father, Brett, told WHAS11.

His mother did a walk-through before his first day at school to make sure he wouldn't run into any problems because of his height but forgot to check the cafeteria. [We] "noticed that where the food was, was right at his head," Heather told the Beaverton School District. Then, to make things more of a struggle, he had to carry his tray outside to the lunch benches.

The school made him a makeshift cart out of an upside-down milk crate on wheels to help him transport his lunch from the cafeteria to the benches.

"When I saw it I thought, 'Wow,'" said Enedelia Mottram, who's served lunch for the school district for 18 years. "I just wanted to help Julian, because I mean his head barely reaches the lunch line. He can't see anything."


Julian's first cart wasn't cutting the mustard.

via Beaverton School District

That night, she talked to her husband, James, a metalworker, to see if he could come up with something better. He got his team together at Wright Manufacturing in Portland to create a new cart that allowed Julian to transport his lunch tray and see over the counter.

James told the Beaverton School District that he wanted to make something that Julian would be "proud to push around."

James and his team put together a badass cart with adjustable, handlebar grips just like a motorcycle that has a stool inside so he can reach the countertop. It is adorned with flames and a personalized license plate that says, "JULIAN."

Julian's parents were blown away by the care and creativity that was put into creating his cart.

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"They took the time to get those license plates with his name, which is just like, they just really put a lot of heart into it. So when I saw it, the first thing I saw was actually a picture of James and his team who made the cart and I cried. It's just such a sweet thing," Heather said.

Julian loves the license plate and the flames and is now able to grab his lunch and get out to the benches in style.

"He's independent now," said Mottram. "Before, a staff member [would] have to be there to help him," she said.

Heather hopes that the story will inspire others to reach out and help other people in need.

"There's just wonderful people in this world that, you know, they have their eyes open. They're seeing needs that need to be met and they're meeting them. So I hope that other kids can get their needs met through this," she said.


This article originally appeared on 11.3.21

Image collage created with Canva

A teacher went viral after using her period as a teaching moment with students

Teachers are almost always teaching even when it's not in their lesson plan.

Those that were born to be teachers find teachable moments everywhere and one woman found herself in one of those moments. Though this one was likely just a bit more personal than she probably would've liked.


Emily Elizabeth posted a TikTok video about how she found herself in a predicament in front of her classroom full of 10 and 11-year-old kids.

The teacher explained that she was noticing a lot of commotion and whispering among the little girls in her class while she was wearing white pants. After reminding the girls to stay on task, the whispering continued, prompting Emily to be more direct.

That's when one of the girls asked to speak with her privately dropping the bomb that no one that gets periods wants to hear in public.


"She goes, 'I'm sorry Ms. Emily, but I just want to let you know that I think you might have got your period,'" the teacher recalls.

But instead of freaking out or being flustered, Emily decided to swallow her embarrassment and use the moment as a teachable experience. She promptly told the concerned girls that it was fine and that she had a change of clothes that she could wear. Just before excusing herself, the boys noticed something was wrong so they curiously asked.

Emily informed them that she had gotten her period and while she was annoyed, she was perfectly fine.

One of the boys even sent her an email double checking that she was okay in a less public way. The sweet reaction from her class warmed her heart and the hearts of viewers.

"That boy who emailed...his parents must be incredible," one commenter says.

"You set an excellent example! And to not hide it from the boys who asked because that would have spoken SO LOUDLY to the boys and girls about normalizing periods," another writes.

"The email, you sound like an amazing teacher with an amazing group of kids," someone says.

You can watch Emily tell the entire story below:

@emilyelizabeth.w

Let’s normalise talking about periods for girls AND boys … trying to find the silver lining 😅 #fyp #melbourneteacher #teachersoftiktok #teacherlife

This article originally appeared on 10.2.23

Photo cropped from Facebook page.

Everyone eats sexualized or not.

When it comes to breasts, Americans really have it twisted. We've sexualized them to such a point we no longer see them for their main purpose: feeding babies.

This disconnect is so extreme that when women breastfeed their children in public they are often met with scorn or shame.


Florida mom and anti-circumcision advocate, Ashley Kaidel, isn't having it anymore.

Facebook, viral photo, motherhood, babies

Not having it.

media1.giphy.com


Kaidel was breastfeeding in an unnamed restaurant when another diner gave her the stink-eye, just for feeding her child in public.

So Kaidel took a photo of herself staring right back at the shamer and posted it to Facebook. The photo quickly went viral, receiving over 420,000 likes.

In her post, she explained why she had such a stern look on her face.

"In the picture, it appears I'm staring off into the distance. In reality, I'm staring into the eyes of a woman staring at me. She is looking at me with disgust and shaking her head with judgement in an attempt to shame me and indirectly tell me without words that I am wrong and need to cover myself.”

Kaidel says she breastfeeds in public to reduce the stigma surrounding it.

"I do this for the person that has the mentality 'Boobs are to be covered. They're for your husbands eyes only. They're intimate. It's a personal/private thing to feed your baby. Cover up out of respect. My kids don't need to see that. Walk out of the room' and any other derogatory, close-minded comments and sentiments alike.”

Then, she cut through all the nonsense surrounding breasts to explain their real purpose.

"[B]reasts were made to sustain your baby's life before they were made to bring pleasure to any other man, woman, partner or spouse. Their sole purpose is to make food and dispense it straight into a baby's mouth. There is nothing weird about this and there's no difference in me feeding my baby with my breast than you feeding yourself with a spoon.

Finally, Kaidel had some strong words for the next person who attempts to shame her for breastfeeding in public.

"No person should be isolated and shunned because they're eating, especially when you yourself are eating while ridiculing how someone else is eating. Is it not certainly easier to avert your eyes from a displeasing sight rather than suggest or demand a mother and child remove themselves from your presence? How pompous and selfish is this? Just look away. It's simple to do so. No harm done at all."

via GIPHY

This article originally appeared on 11.24.15