Still think the Civil War wasn’t fought over slavery? The Confederate states would disagree.

Was the Civil War fought over slavery or states’ rights? People love to debate this question, and many seem to believe it’s a matter of opinion. But the truth is there’s no debate to be had. We don’t have to conjecture. We know that the Confederate states’ primary motive was maintaining the right to enslave…

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ArrayPhoto credit: Ryan Schultz/Creative Commons

Was the Civil War fought over slavery or states’ rights? People love to debate this question, and many seem to believe it’s a matter of opinion.


But the truth is there’s no debate to be had. We don’t have to conjecture. We know that the Confederate states’ primary motive was maintaining the right to enslave black people because they said so themselves.

We have the primary documents that explain, in detail, why Confederates wanted to break off from the U.S., and they are eye-opening to say the least. Even those who already understand slavery to be the primary cause of the Civil War may be shocked to see how blatantly and proudly the Southern states announced their intention to defend white supremacy and their right to own black people.

MARCH 21, 1861 SPEECH BY VICE PRESIDENT OF THE CONFEDERACY, ALEXANDER STEPHENS

First let’s take a look at a speech given by Alexander Stephens, Vice President of the Confederacy, just a few weeks before the Civil War officially began. After describing some details of the Confederacy’s Constitution, Vice President Stephens stated that slavery was the “immediate cause” of the South’s “revolution.”

“But not to be tedious in enumerating the numerous changes for the better, allow me to allude to one other though last, not least. The new constitution has put at rest, forever, all the agitating questions relating to our peculiar institution, African slavery as it exists amongst us – the proper status of the negro in our form of civilization. This was the immediate cause of the late rupture and present revolution. Jefferson in his forecast, had anticipated this, as the ‘rock upon which the old Union would split.’ He was right. What was conjecture with him, is now a realized fact.”

I mean, he said it right there. Slavery of black people was the “immediate cause” of secession and the impending war.

But he didn’t stop there. No, he laid out the entire racist foundation of the new government in no uncertain terms.

The prevailing ideas entertained by him [Jefferson] and most of the leading statesmen at the time of the formation of the old constitution, were that the enslavement of the African was in violation of the laws of nature; that it was wrong in principle, socially, morally, and politically. It was an evil they knew not well how to deal with, but the general opinion of the men of that day was that, somehow or other in the order of Providence, the institution would be evanescent and pass away . . . Those ideas, however, were fundamentally wrong. They rested upon the assumption of the equality of races. This was an error. It was a sandy foundation, and the government built upon it fell when the ‘storm came and the wind blew.’

Our new government is founded upon exactly the opposite idea; its foundations are laid, its corner-stone rests, upon the great truth that the negro is not equal to the white man; that slavery—subordination to the superior race—is his natural and normal condition. This, our new government, is the first, in the history of the world, based upon this great physical, philosophical, and moral truth.”

Hmmm, so the South literally founded the Confederate government on the idea that slavery wasn’t just acceptable, but that black people were actually supposed to be enslaved. This was stated plainly and proudly.

Need a moment? Yeah, me too. Take a deep breath, because we’re just getting going here.

RELATED: This West Point colonel will tell you what the Civil War was really about.

Moving on, Stephens called the Northern abolitionists “fanatics,” saying, They assume that the negro is equal, and hence conclude that he is entitled to equal privileges and rights with the white man. If their premises were correct, their conclusions would be logical and just but their premise being wrong, their whole argument fails. . . .

There’s more.

With us, all of the white race, however high or low, rich or poor, are equal in the eye of the law. Not so with the negro. Subordination is his place. He, by nature, or by the curse against Canaan, is fitted for that condition which he occupies in our system.”

Stephens then went on to explain how God designed humanity so that one race would be subordinate to another, and that going against slavery is going against “the ordinance of the Creator.”

It seriously could not be more clear: The Confederates were proud white supremacists who wanted to build a country around that ideal.

Lest anyone argue that this was just one speech or just one man’s opinion, or that maybe Stephens didn’t speak for the whole Confederacy (despite being Vice President of it), let’s look at what the Confederate states themselves said.

DECLARATION OF THE CAUSES OF SECEDING STATES, 1861

In addition to the Ordinances of Secession announcing the departure of each of the Confederate states from the U.S., a handful of Southern states issued a Declaration of the Causes of Seceding States, explaining in detail why they felt they needed to leave the Union.

You can read the document in its entirety here, but let’s take a look at some highlights. (The first thing to note is that some iteration of the word “slave” appears 83 times in these declarations. So, yeah.)

GEORGIA

Right out of the gate, Georgia let everyone know that slavery is at the forefront of its concerns. The second sentence of their declaration reads:

For the last ten years we have had numerous and serious causes of complaint against our non-slave-holding confederate States with reference to the subject of African slavery.”

Okay then.

As we read through Georgia’s lengthy history lesson of how the states got to this point, it’s worth noting that they rarely referred to the “Northern” and “Southern” states. Instead, they referred to “non-slaveholding states” and “slave-holding states.” That alone ought to be a clue as to their motivations.

But if that’s not enough, here’s where Georgia stated that the Republican Party’s anti-slavery stance justified its decision to leave the Union.

A brief history of the rise, progress, and policy of anti-slavery and the political organization into whose hands the administration of the Federal Government has been committed will fully justify the pronounced verdict of the people of Georgia. The party of Lincoln, called the Republican party, under its present name and organization, is of recent origin. It is admitted to be an anti-slavery party. While it attracts to itself by its creed the scattered advocates of exploded political heresies, of condemned theories in political economy, the advocates of commercial restrictions, of protection, of special privileges, of waste and corruption in the administration of Government, anti-slavery is its mission and its purpose. By anti-slavery it is made a power in the state. The question of slavery was the great difficulty in the way of the formation of the Constitution.

While the subordination and the political and social inequality of the African race was fully conceded by all, it was plainly apparent that slavery would soon disappear from what are now the non-slave-holding States of the original thirteen.”

Finally, they summed up how racial equality and the prohibition of slavery, being the primary concern of the non-slaveholding states, was something they simply would not abide.

The prohibition of slavery in the Territories, hostility to it everywhere, the equality of the black and white races, disregard of all constitutional guarantees in its favor, were boldly proclaimed by its leaders and applauded by its followers.

With these principles on their banners and these utterances on their lips the majority of the people of the North demand that we shall receive them as our rulers.

The prohibition of slavery in the Territories is the cardinal principle of this organization.

For forty years this question has been considered and debated in the halls of Congress, before the people, by the press, and before the tribunals of justice. The majority of the people of the North in 1860 decided it in their own favor. We refuse to submit to that judgment, and in vindication of our refusal we offer the Constitution of our country and point to the total absence of any express power to exclude us.”

Thank you, Georgia, for clarifying your position.

MISSISSIPPI

Again, right out the gate, Mississippi told everyone that slavery is their main reason for seceding. Here’s how their declaration begins, no sentences skipped:

“In the momentous step which our State has taken of dissolving its connection with the government of which we so long formed a part, it is but just that we should declare the prominent reasons which have induced our course.

Our position is thoroughly identified with the institution of slavery—the greatest material interest of the world.”

Once they made that clear, they explained how they simply couldn’t live without slavery because black people were made to tend their crops.

“Its labor supplies the product which constitutes by far the largest and most important portions of commerce of the earth. These products are peculiar to the climate verging on the tropical regions, and by an imperious law of nature, none but the black race can bear exposure to the tropical sun. These products have become necessities of the world, and a blow at slavery is a blow at commerce and civilization. That blow has been long aimed at the institution, and was at the point of reaching its consummation. There was no choice left us but submission to the mandates of abolition, or a dissolution of the Union, whose principles had been subverted to work out our ruin. That we do not overstate the dangers to our institution, a reference to a few facts will sufficiently prove.”

Mississippi just stated that their only choices were to give up slavery or secede. And if that still seems unclear somehow, here are some of the “facts” they included for why they couldn’t stay in the Union:

“It has grown until it denies the right of property in slaves, and refuses protection to that right on the high seas, in the Territories, and wherever the government of the United States had jurisdiction.

“It refuses the admission of new slave States into the Union, and seeks to extinguish it by confining it within its present limits, denying the power of expansion.”

“It has nullified the Fugitive Slave Law in almost every free State in the Union, and has utterly broken the compact which our fathers pledged their faith to maintain.”

“It advocates negro equality, socially and politically, and promotes insurrection and incendiarism in our midst.”

“It has made combinations and formed associations to carry out its schemes of emancipation in the States and wherever else slavery exists.”

How can anyone say that the war wasn’t about slavery at this point?

SOUTH CAROLINA

South Carolina’s declaration started off sounding like it was all about “FREE AND INDEPENDENT STATES,” as they used that all-caps phrase repeatedly in recounting the history of why the colonies broke off from England. But when they got into their specific grievances with the Union, guess what they complained about. Yup, slavery.

The General Government, as the common agent, passed laws to carry into effect these stipulations of the States. For many years these laws were executed. But an increasing hostility on the part of the non-slaveholding States to the institution of slavery, has led to a disregard of their obligations, and the laws of the General Government have ceased to effect the objects of the Constitution.

They went on and on about non-slaveholding states trying to control their “property” and “institutions.” We could guess what they meant by that, but we don’t have to because they told us.

“Those States have assume [sic] the right of deciding upon the propriety of our domestic institutions; and have denied the rights of property established in fifteen of the States and recognized by the Constitution; they have denounced as sinful the institution of slavery; they have permitted open establishment among them of societies, whose avowed object is to disturb the peace and to eloign the property of the citizens of other States. They have encouraged and assisted thousands of our slaves to leave their homes; and those who remain, have been incited by emissaries, books and pictures to servile insurrection.

They even got specific about states that passed anti-slavery laws, which they claimed went against the Constitution.

“The State of New Jersey, at an early day, passed a law in conformity with her constitutional obligation; but the current of anti-slavery feeling has led her more recently to enact laws which render inoperative the remedies provided by her own law and by the laws of Congress. In the State of New York even the right of transit for a slave has been denied by her tribunals; and the States of Ohio and Iowa have refused to surrender to justice fugitives charged with murder, and with inciting servile insurrection in the State of Virginia. Thus the constituted compact has been deliberately broken and disregarded by the non-slaveholding States, and the consequence follows that South Carolina is released from her obligation.”

Again, South Carolina was clear that the North’s hostility toward slavery was what drove them to break away, thereby leading to war.

TEXAS

Ah, Texas. If you thought the deep south was the only place that gleefully celebrated the enslavement of black people, take a look at the Lone Star State’s declaration. It’s a doozy.

RELATED: A school assignment asked for 3 benefits of slavery. This kid gave the only good answer.

First, here’s how Texas described being accepted into the Confederacy:

“She [Texas] was received as a commonwealth holding, maintaining and protecting the institution known as negro slavery—the servitude of the African to the white race within her limits—a relation that had existed from the first settlement of her wilderness by the white race, and which her people intended should exist in all future time.

So, not only is white people enslaving black people fine and dandy—it’s a subjugation that should go on forever and ever. Got it.

“In all the non-slave-holding States, in violation of that good faith and comity which should exist between entirely distinct nations, the people have formed themselves into a great sectional party, now strong enough in numbers to control the affairs of each of those States, based upon an unnatural feeling of hostility to these Southern States and their beneficent and patriarchal system of African slavery, proclaiming the debasing doctrine of equality of all men, irrespective of race or color– a doctrine at war with nature, in opposition to the experience of mankind, and in violation of the plainest revelations of Divine Law. They demand the abolition of negro slavery throughout the confederacy, the recognition of political equality between the white and negro races, and avow their determination to press on their crusade against us, so long as a negro slave remains in these States.”

Sorry, I need to pause for a second. “Their beneficent and patriarchal system of African slavery”? And “the debasing doctrine of equality of all men”? The state of Texas said here that equality was not just unnatural but against God’s law. We all know that racism was the standard of the day, but I don’t think most of us were taught how deeply held these white supremacist beliefs were in the South’s own words.

And again, they weren’t done.

We hold as undeniable truths that the governments of the various States, and of the confederacy itself, were established exclusively by the white race, for themselves and their posterity; that the African race had no agency in their establishment; that they were rightfully held and regarded as an inferior and dependent race, and in that condition only could their existence in this country be rendered beneficial or tolerable.”

Still not done…

“That in this free government *all white men are and of right ought to be entitled to equal civil and political rights* [emphasis in the original]; that the servitude of the African race, as existing in these States, is mutually beneficial to both bond and free, and is abundantly authorized and justified by the experience of mankind, and the revealed will of the Almighty Creator, as recognized by all Christian nations

“Mutually beneficial to both bond and free.” Oh yes, those lucky slaves, living just as the Almighty intended.

If you wonder why people see the Confederate flag as a racist symbol, this is why. If you wonder why honoring the leaders of the Confederacy with monuments and holidays is horrifically problematic, this is why.

We have it straight from the Confederates’ mouths. The Civil War was fought because the South wanted the right to keep slavery and the North wanted to abolish it. People can say it was about states’ rights, but it’s disingenuous to omit the primary moral, political, and economic right the South was fighting to maintain—the legal and systematic subjugation and enslavement of black people.

They seriously could not have been any clearer about it.

  • 85-year-old woman in senior home brings down the house with Fleetwood Mac ‘Landslide’ cover
    A woman sings "Landslide" by Fleetwood Mac at karaoke.Photo credit: Cecily Knobler
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    85-year-old woman in senior home brings down the house with Fleetwood Mac ‘Landslide’ cover

    On a hot Sunday in July, Carole Wade took the mic at a Dallas senior living facility where my mom lives. I happened to be visiting for the karaoke event, and the list of residents who couldn’t wait to put their stamps on their favorite tunes was so long, the event had to be extended.…

    On a hot Sunday in July, Carole Wade took the mic at a Dallas senior living facility where my mom lives. I happened to be visiting for the karaoke event, and the list of residents who couldn’t wait to put their stamps on their favorite tunes was so long, the event had to be extended. ABBA’s “Mamma Mia,” David Lee Roth’s “Just a Gigolo”—you name it, they sang it.

    When it was Wade’s turn, the microphone was brought to her table. She took it in her hands as though it was an extension of her fingers as the music cued up. Then, as she began to effortlessly sing “Landslide” by Fleetwood Mac, the room got still. Frozen. All eyes were on her, and most of those eyes were wet. The lyrics, so beautifully fitting:

    “Well, I’ve been afraid of changin’
    ‘Cause I’ve built my life around you.
    But time makes you bolder,
    Even children get older,
    I’m getting old too.”

    A man sitting at our table took notice of how emotional I had become. He leaned over to say, “Never stop feeling the music.”

    I had the honor of chatting with Wade, who at 85, has been singing nearly her whole life. She got started in the business as a backup singer in Elvis impersonator groups in Dallas and surrounding areas. In and out of bands, playing Deep Ellum clubs and local hotels, she shares, “I’ve been singing since I was a small child. I’ve loved music all my life.”

    As luck would have it, she was at a jam session when she started harmonizing with other musicians. They would soon form her most recent band, Psychedelic Oatmeal. They officially stopped playing gigs when she was in her 70s, but they remain close. (She notes her bandmates were all much younger.)

    bands, carole wade, music, old friends, singer
    Carole and her band mates. Carole Wade

    They covered classic rock tunes from Stevie Nicks, The Eagles, Janis Joplin, and Led Zeppelin. Songs like “Me and Bobby McGee,” “Seven Bridges Road,” and “Whole Lotta Love.” She laughs that most of the men in the band couldn’t hit those Zeppelin high notes made famous by Robert Plant, so she took on the challenge—with great success.

    They even branded themselves at gigs, making little Ziploc bags of oatmeal and glitter, which they would throw to the audience at shows. That is, until a club owner asked them to stop, as the oatmeal was mixing with spilled drinks, “creating goo.”

    Rare footage of Psychedelics Oatmeal.

    Wade makes clear that music is her therapy. “If you’re down on a certain day, it will bring you up.” She has lived a full life, with two grown sons who are both excelling in life. But music, and the friends with whom she makes it, brings her that extra piece of joy and purpose.

    Michael Hatcher, the Resident Services Director at The Reserve at North Dallas (the senior facility in which this event was held), has seen firsthand how music soothes seniors. It reconnects them to their purest selves, no matter how hazy their memories might become. Hatcher shares, “They remember the music, and the time. It’s a vessel for anyone of age. It can be used to bring someone out of the deepest sun-downing and back to life.”

    A man sings “Just a Gigolo” at The Reserve karaoke day.

    There is much research to support this. Bannerhealth.com quotes music therapy coordinator Tammy Reiver for Banner Hospice in Phoenix: Music holds the power to increase dopamine levels (happy hormones), decrease symptoms of depression and pain, and improve a person’s quality of life. Pleasing music plays an important role at every age, but for aging adults, the benefits are even greater.”

    As for Wade? She jokes that she and a few other musicians at the senior home have plans to start their own band. She certainly has the chops for it—and the fans.

    This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

  • Millennials are growing concerned about their Boomer parents being glued to their phones
    Millennials are fed up with their Boomer parents always being on their phones.Photo credit: Images via Canva
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    Millennials are growing concerned about their Boomer parents being glued to their phones

    Millennials have never shied away from sharing their feelings about their Boomer parents (and their grandparenting abilities) on the Internet. Millennials are once again uniting to discuss a similar observation about their Boomer parents’ frustrating phone use. On Reddit in a thread generational differences, Millennial member Old-Beautiful-3971 shared their frustrating experience with their Boomer parents…

    Millennials have never shied away from sharing their feelings about their Boomer parents (and their grandparenting abilities) on the Internet. Millennials are once again uniting to discuss a similar observation about their Boomer parents’ frustrating phone use.

    On Reddit in a thread generational differences, Millennial member Old-Beautiful-3971 shared their frustrating experience with their Boomer parents who are perpetually on their phones.

    “My parents are on the very young end of being ‘boomers’. For some reason they’re both acting like me when I was 20… that is to say, gluuuued to their phones,” they wrote. “I tried to have an important conversation with my dad this morning and he did not once look up (and I’m certain he was scrolling through Instagram videos).”

    phone, boomer, boomer phone, phones, phone habits
    Self Portrait Reaction GIF by The Garcu00edas Giphy

    They went on to add, “The only difference is that when I was 20 he could, and would often say ‘Look at me when I’m talking to you. Put that thing away.’ But if I said that to him now he’d get defensive and probably yell at me for being disrespectful. What the heck??? ”

    The passionate post got a rousing response from fellow Millennials who have experienced the same thing with their Boomer parents.

    “I have noticed it too and it makes me feel even weirder for having developed in the habit of flipping my phone face-down with my hands folded on top of it to let the person know that I’m listening for that they have my attention,” one commented. “And to think that it’s coming from the generation that tells everybody else that phones and TV will rot your brains.”

    phone, no phones, phone gif, boomer phone, parents phone

    Turn It Off Reaction GIF by Robert E Blackmon Giphy

    Another shared, “My parents are visiting me right now. My dad is glued to his phone, even at the table during meals. Never once participating in the conversation except to point at the salt. This is the same man who would have screamed at me for bringing a book to the dinner table.”

    Others could commiserate about the role-reversal. “I’ve noticed this with my parents. It seems like I’ve switched places with them. I’m trying to use the online world less where as they are using it more and more,” one commented.

    Some Millennials noted that their Boomer parents’ phone use has impacted other activities they attempt to do together. “It’s become so difficult to watch a movie with my parents. I tell them to put away their phone. Sometimes movies take two days to finish,” another shared.

    phone down, put phone away, put away phone, phone addiction, no phones

    Creators Club Phone Addiction GIF by Dylan McKeever Giphy

    Many Millennials also shared how they communicate with their parents when they notice it. “I am witnessing that as well, my boomer mom and my almost gen z brother visit and they are both glued to their phones. I try and ask if they can put them away because I don’t like my little son to see people like that. I do scroll but never when I am with him,” one Millennial shared.

    Another added, “I stopped visiting my boomer mom for awhile. I told her to her face that I couldn’t stand the fact that I took the time to drive to her, which I really hate driving, it scares me and I’m not very good at it, and spend MY time with her only for her to be on her phone most of that time. I stopped calling her too because of all the times she’d put me on hold to take another call and then tell me that she’d have to call me back, but she never did. I still rarely call her. I just text so it’s less intrusive and hurtful for me. Now when I visit, her and her husband stay off their phones. They turn the TV down and only put quiet music on instead of blaring whatever crap they were watching. I did thank them for it.”

    no phone, no phones, phones away, put phone down, boomer phone

    Chicago Pd Nbc GIF by One Chicago Giphy

    However, a Gen Z commentor was quick to point out that Gen X is guilty of the same habit. “My gen x parents are hella addicted to their phones (I’m 22 for context),” they wrote. “I’m not saying i’m not, but it’s really hypocritical when they’ll be bitching at me about ‘playing on my phone too much’ when they’re literal ipad kids lol. the reality is, screens and social media are addicting to ANYONE, regardless of age.”

    Other Millennials pointed out that it’s not just certain generations that are addicted to their phones. “I’m guilty of it as well. Everyone is at risk of screen addiction in this era,” another noted. And another Millennial quipped, “Phones are addictive, that doesn’t just like go away with oldness .”

    This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

  • Gen Xers are rewatching ‘Ferris Bueller’s Day Off’ and it hits differently than they remembered
    Gen X re-watched Ferris Bueller's Day Off, and some are debating it didn't age well.Photo credit: Images via Wikipedia/Canva
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    Gen Xers are rewatching ‘Ferris Bueller’s Day Off’ and it hits differently than they remembered

    One of the most iconic movies from the 1980s is Ferris Bueller’s Day Off. The film premiered in 1986, and is the epitome of Gen X pop culture. Recently Gen Xers (those born between 1965 and 1980) have been re-watching the childhood classic with their Gen Z kids…and it’s not quite what they remembered. In…

    One of the most iconic movies from the 1980s is Ferris Bueller’s Day Off. The film premiered in 1986, and is the epitome of Gen X pop culture.

    Recently Gen Xers (those born between 1965 and 1980) have been re-watching the childhood classic with their Gen Z kids…and it’s not quite what they remembered. In a Reddit community of Gen Xers, member dilatanntedad shared his thoughts after a recent viewing, and it has Gen Xers passionately dissecting it.

    Ferris Bueller did not age well,” he wrote. “I (m53) watched Ferris Bueller’s Day Off this weekend with my kids, ages 9 and 10. Of course there are the iconic lines like ‘Life moves fast…’ and ‘Bueller, Bueller, Bueller…’ but the more I watched, the less fun it was.”

    “To be honest, at the end I agreed with Ferris’ sister: why does he get away with all this shit when she never could? He’s a rich privileged white boy who punches down, tricking and taking advantage of pathetic school administrators, restaurant workers, younger kids at school, his parents, and even manipulates his best friend,” he wrote, before adding, “He has no empathy for others and does everything for his own enjoyment.”

    He ended his post with a final thought: “I know I’m a grumpy old man yelling at clouds, but I’m no longer amused by his antics. And I don’t think Ferris Bueller could be the hero today that he was in the Reagan 80’s.” He then followed up with a comment about his kids’ thoughts: “To be clear, my kids laughed a lot. And I did too. I was just uncomfortable with the overall message.”

    His fellow Gen Xers had a lot of opinions to add in, noting that it may not be the film that aged poorly…but them. “I think part of the charm is that at the time it was fun to watch and we could half-identify with the antics,” another Gen Xer wrote. “Watching it from today’s lens, it seems clear that he was likely peaking, destined for very little or mediocrity at best. His privilege came from his two very hard-working, square, corporate parents.”

    ferris bueller, ferris buellers day off, ferris bueller gif, 80s movie, 80s ferris bueller
    matthew broderick film GIF Giphy

    Tthe comment got a meaningful reply: “This. It’s less that the movie aged poorly, it’s that we aged and see it from a totally different perspective. At 16 I wanted to be Ferris. Care free, everything works out, hot girlfriend, zero responsibilities. Looking back at people I went to high school [with] who were close to that, aren’t exactly successful in life. So we see what that behavior leads to and no longer idolize it.”

    Many Gen Xers feel the movie is cinema gold to this day. “I still love it. Stop acting like a boomer ,” one wrote. Another added, “This movie is the GOAT. It aged like wine.” Another agreed: “The movie aged fine. We’re the ones that aged out of its target demographic.”

    ferris bueller, ferris buellers day off, ferris bueller gif, ferris gif, ferris bueller quote

    john lennon film GIF Giphy

    However, Gen Xers championed Cameron as the film’s most redeeming character. “My kids thought it was great. I’ve always considered Cameron to be the actual protagonist of the story – he’s the one who experiences character growth and conflict,” one commented.

    cameron, ferris bueller cameron, cameron from ferris bueller, ferris buellers day off, cameron gif

    Ferris Buellers Day Off 80S GIF Giphy

    A fellow Gen Xer added, “That is critically accurate. Without Cameron, this movie is a fable. Ferris learns nothing and does not change. He is the narrator—we know this because he talks to the audience and is definitely aware he’s in a movie. Someone else pointed out that Ferris is Cameron’s manic-pixie dream girl. That’s a good way to look at it. Another is that he is the wise mentor figure (like Ben Kenobi) and Cameron is following the heroes journey. We just don’t see his confrontation with his father as the REAL confrontation is internal.”

    While Gen Xers may not all agree on the movie’s current-day relevance, many had fun theorizing where Ferris may be today, with one noting, “I bet Ferris would use AI to write his English papers :/.”

    This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

  • Frugal people share their 35 splurges that are worth ‘every penny’
    Frugal people share their shopping tips and what is worth splurging on.Photo credit: Image via Canva
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    Frugal people share their 35 splurges that are worth ‘every penny’

    Living a frugal life is all about saving money. Frugal people pay attention to how much they spend on pretty much everything they buy. But even penny pinchers know that for quality, life-improving items, certain things are worth splurging on. On a Reddit thread of frugal people, member WildRootKitchen posed the following question to fellow…

    Living a frugal life is all about saving money. Frugal people pay attention to how much they spend on pretty much everything they buy. But even penny pinchers know that for quality, life-improving items, certain things are worth splurging on.

    On a Reddit thread of frugal people, member WildRootKitchen posed the following question to fellow frugal shoppers: “What’s one thing you splurge on that’s worth every penny?”

    Frugal people spilled on the things they don’t mind dropping money on. These are 35 splurges frugal people say are worth “every penny.”

    splurge, splurging, frugal splurge, splurges, money splurge
    Celebrate Parks And Rec GIF Giphy

    “For me, it’s a solid pair of boots and a good mattress. If my feet and back are shot, the whole day’s downhill from there. I’ll eat leftovers and skip takeout all week if it means I’m sleeping right and walking easy. Also decent coffee and laundry service are creeping up the list too.” —WildRootKitchen

    “Air conditioning. I make money so I can be comfortable, not be uncomfortable so I can save money.” —strwbrymocha

    “AC/Heat, always. I’ll never bat an eye at a higher utility bill so long as my sleep goes uninterrupted.” —MediumBullfrog8688

    “A house cleaner. Maybe that doesn’t sound frugal, but for the mental health benefits I get from knowing every two weeks I will come home to a spotless house, it’s something I will continue to prioritize over many other expenses.” —mzmonarda

    “Gym membership, mattress and pillow, running shoes, quality ingredients from supermarket.” —LoudSilence16

    “I have a method for splurges on unfamiliar items. I’ll buy a tool from harbor freight or a cheap version of something I’m interested in to see if I actually need the item or if I’m interested in it. If I use it a bunch and it breaks, then I splurge on a high quality version. If it just sits somewhere either because I didn’t need it as much as I thought or I wasn’t as interested as I thought, then I’m only out a few bucks. Example: I really enjoy cooking, I wanted to learn how to make sausage. I bought a cheap sausage stuffer on amazon for like $30. I used the hell out of it and it broke broke a couple years later. I did some research and bought a LEM 5lbs sausage stuffer that was like $120 and now I have a high quality piece of equipment that works WAY better than my POS amazon stuffer and it will likely outlive my great grandchildren. Also, name brand hardware like faucets. Learned my lesson from buying cheap faucets. Now I’ll just buy Moen.” —40ozT0Freedom

    “Darn Tough Socks.” —gregarious119

    “Smartwool for me.” —Natural-Run9072

    socks, sock gif, quality socks, splurge socks, sock
    Socks GIF Giphy

    “I live in rural South Carolina. It’s worth it to me to pay for quarterly pest control service from a professional. There are a lot of insects, rodents, reptiles, etc.” —snarkker

    “Vacations.” —Proud_Trainer_1234

    “An ergonomic desk chair. Back pain is no joke. I only wish I had done it much sooner. Not 20 years into my desk job. At least I should have another 20 years with a good chair and no back pain. I spent $700 on my chair and it was worth every penny. The frugal me shopped around but this was the cheapest one I could find new, some outlets were selling the exact same chair for over $800. 10 year warranty on the chair was a nice bonus too. My husband found the exact same chair secondhand for $100 so now we match. His doesn’t have a 10 year warranty but that’s OK for $100.” —Bunnyeatsdesign

    “Buy a second pair of good boots and rotate them. Letting the leather air out a day before wearing the shoes again really help extend their life. I have two cats. I feed them the best grain-free food they will eat. Not only does this extend their life span, the daily litter box collections are much smaller than if they get grain.” —Childless_Catlady42

    workout, fitness, exercise, lifting, fitness gif

    Alfred Hitchcock Workout GIF Giphy

    “I tend to indulge myself when it comes to exercise stuff. The gym classes that I’ll actually go to, the races, the equipment, the good clothes & shoes. I know that everyone talks about a good mattress for their back, but for me, no mattress is as effective as yoga and weight lifting. As long as I keep my core strong, I don’t have back spasms. And running has been amazing for my mental health along with physical, and helped me make some amazing friends. Totally worth every penny.” —kaizenkitten

    “I dedicate a decent portion of my budget to ‘self care’. Think massages, pedicures, manicures. It’s the one thing I forward to it every month, as it’s some of the only downtime I have right now.” —YesChef__

    “Professional Movers. Stop asking your friends ( especially over 30) to help you move! It’s not worth a six pack of beer and some pizza.” —1tiredmommy

    first class, business class, travel, first class gif, luxury travel

    First Class GIF by Slice Giphy

    “Business class/first class — never once have I regretted it. We live reasonably the rest of the time, but when it comes time to travel, this is an indulgence that we grant ourselves.” —Weekly_Leg_2457

    “Just here in case nobody said tattoos yet. Good work ain’t cheap & cheap work ain’t good.” —Clear_Beat5117

    “Reverse osmosis filter. Makes tap water taste good again.” —wonminus1

    “Ethical meat. I feel better about eating it, I’m supporting local farmers, and the taste and quality blows supermarket meat out of the water. At this point, I am perfectly happy only eating meat a few times a week (my husband and I are both former vegetarians) and making sure that when we do eat it, it comes from animals who only had one bad day. (This goes for eggs, too – pasture raised/certified humane whenever it’s available. We don’t eat much dairy for health and animal welfare reasons.)” —dzwonzie

    tires, tire, tire gif, good tires, quality tires

    Fly Rotate GIF by Ilves Motors Giphy

    “Tires too.” —Pessimistic_Penguin2

    “I’m frugal to the max most of the time, but come spring I spend money on flowers, shrubs, things for gardening. That’s my guilty pleasure. I listen to audiobooks from my library. I haven’t watched tv in years because trying to get local channels is impossible. So no streaming service, no cable, but I’m content. I can splurge without feeling guilty like I’ve saved up for it.” —Garden_Lady2

    “Furniture. Well made, excellent cushions, materials…both indoor and out.” —ildadof3

    “Ice cream.” —Clutcha15

    This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

  • A pro wrestler left the ring mid-match to stop security from manhandling a boy with Down syndrome
    Shawn Michaels stopped a performance in front of 13,000 to help a fan in need.Photo credit: Mandy Coombes – Flickr: WWE – Birmingham 210695 (19), CC BY-SA 2.0 & David Seto, CC BY 2.0,
    ,

    A pro wrestler left the ring mid-match to stop security from manhandling a boy with Down syndrome

    Professional wrestling in the 1990s was really something else. Dominated at the time by the WWF (now WWE), stars like Stone Cold Steve Austin, Bret “The Hitman” Hart, and The Undertaker were larger than life and some of the most popular public sports figures in the world well before The Rock and John Cena hit…

    Professional wrestling in the 1990s was really something else. Dominated at the time by the WWF (now WWE), stars like Stone Cold Steve Austin, Bret “The Hitman” Hart, and The Undertaker were larger than life and some of the most popular public sports figures in the world well before The Rock and John Cena hit the scene.

    And then there was Shawn “The Heartbreak Kid” Michaels, who was perhaps the biggest star of all during his heyday. Known for his extraordinarily cocky and vain character, Michaels was a terrific performer both in the ring and on the mic, making him a beloved fan favorite.

    wwe, wwf, shawn michaels, stone cold steve austin, wrestling, pro wrestling, sports, down syndrome, special needs
    Peak Shawn Michaels was larger than life. Giphy

    In one iconic moment from a 1997 match, Shawn Michaels stopped and left the ring mid-match when he noticed a security scuffle taking place just a few feet away.

    The 1997 King of the Ring Pay Per View event featured Shawn Michaels taking on Stone Cold Steve Austin, pitting two of the sport’s biggest stars against each other for what would become a legendary showdown.

    Just a minute or so into the match, Steve Austin stops to stare outside the ring at some kind of disturbance. Michaels quickly clocks what’s going on and slides out of the ring. He saunters over to a group of security personnel who seem to be roughly grabbing at and restraining a young boy. Michaels gently shoves them aside and offers comfort to the boy, who it becomes clear has Down syndrome.

    It would have been the perfect heartwarming moment…if Steve Austin hadn’t run over and immediately started “punching” Michaels in the head! The performers resume their match in the ring for another minute before Michaels again exits and finds the boy. He waves off the security guards and gently escorts the boy down the aisle and safely away from the ring, effectively breaking character in front of the crowd of 13,000 stunned onlookers.

    Once they’re a safe distance from the ring, Michaels hands the boy over to some other officials and a woman who comes running after him, and then returns to the match.

    As a show of respect, Steve Austin holds the ropes open for his opponent to return to the regularly scheduled match, which went on to be an all-time classic.

    In professional wrestling, there’s a concept called “kayfabe“— it means that at no point are the performers or the production to ever, ever indicate that what’s taking place isn’t real.

    We all know that professional wrestling like WWE is staged and mostly scripted. While the athletic stunts are impressive (and the falls really do hurt), the wrestlers in the ring aren’t really fighting each other. It’s all a giant soap opera, with dramatic storylines written that build anticipation for the big showdown.

    What’s so unique about pro wrestling is that this illusion is never broken—especially not in the 90s. Performers like Shawn Michaels were never to break character in interviews or fan interactions, and absolutely never during a live match, let alone one of the main events of a Pay Per View performance!

    Think kayfabe is silly? Tell that to the wrestlers. In 1975, a trio of wrestlers were involved in a horrific plane crash. One of the wrestler’s, Mr. Wrestling, survived and made it to the hospital, where he proceeded to lie to the doctors:

    “While lying in a hospital bed, and with no way of knowing if his compatriots were alive or dead, Mr. Wrestling provided his true name…and then lied about his job to preserve the illusion of wrestling. He knew that if word got out that a good guy, the owner of the company’s brother and three bad guys were all on the same plane, it could ruin that illusion forever,” according to Uproxx.

    A wrestler named Junkyard Dog once became “blinded” during a match and wore dark glasses and a walking cane in public for months afterward, even claiming that he could not see his newborn son. One story goes that the “blind” Junkyard Dog was once sitting ringside at a match when a fan jumped the barrier with a gun close by, and JYD was legitimately torn about whether to stop the man and break kayfabe (luckily, police officers intervened first, but can you believe he really had to give this decision serious weight?!).

    wwe, wwf, shawn michaels, stone cold steve austin, wrestling, pro wrestling, sports, down syndrome, special needs
    Junkyard Dog took kayfabe extremely seriously. Giphy

    Kayfabe also means that, no matter what’s going on around the production, the show must go on. In 1999, a wrestler named Owen Hart died in the ring after some acrobatics equipment sadly malfunctioned. The others wrestlers were ordered to continue performing the rest of the show with Hart’s blood still drying on the mat.

    For Michaels, and Austin to a lesser extend, to break that illusion of reality in order to help a fan showed a tremendous amount of compassion.

    The match has over 12 million views on YouTube, striking a cord with viewers both for the performance and for the amazing display of integrity and warmth by Shawn Michaels. Commenters shared their admiration in droves:

    “Shawn Michael protects the special kid like a caring father. Respect.”

    “Shawn Michaels taking the time to make sure that young man got out of the ring side safely is one of the best things Ive ever seen in wrestling. A legend in the ring and out.”

    “The way Shawn loving blanketed the boy with love to keep him out of the ring and content at the same time was so angelic”

    “How great of shawn was it to break character and go help that disabled olympian kid. What a great guy.”

    “Stone Cold holding the ropes for Shawn Michaels out of respect for what just happened is the greatest breaking kayfabe moment in the history of the WWE. … Stone Cold acknowledged what just happened and how much he had respect for what Michaels just did.”

    Police and security personnel often have extremely poor training on dealing with people with disabilities, which can lead to unnecessary violence. When the young man at this WWF event hopped the railing, he unknowingly put himself in a lot of danger. Shawn Michaels stopping the live performance, breaking character, and helping the boy out with warmth and compassion may have prevented a tragic outcome.

    This article originally appeared [time-difference] ago. It has been updated.

  • ‘Tsundoku’: The 146-year-old Japanese word for your pile of unread books
    Tsundoku will change the way you think about your books.Photo credit: Canva
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    ‘Tsundoku’: The 146-year-old Japanese word for your pile of unread books

    Let’s take a look at that growing stack of books in your room. You know the one: the pile that seems to grow faster than you can read it. It might look like neglect, but it actually says something about your curiosity and hopefulness. Did you know there’s a Japanese word for this? It might…

    Let’s take a look at that growing stack of books in your room. You know the one: the pile that seems to grow faster than you can read it. It might look like neglect, but it actually says something about your curiosity and hopefulness. Did you know there’s a Japanese word for this? It might just change how you see your book pile from now on.

    tsundoku, japanese, books, reading, history
    A girl reads a book indoors. Photo credit: Canva

    Enter the world of “tsundoku” (積ん読). This Japanese term describes buying books you intend to read but end up stacking around your home. Unopened, unread and collecting dust—not mistreated, just waiting for the right time.

    The history behind the “Tsundoku Sensei”

    The word “tsundoku” comes from Japan’s Meiji era, a time when books and reading were becoming more popular. It combines “tsunde-oku,” which means to pile things up and leave them, with “dokusho,” which means “reading books.” The result is a word that perfectly captures an experience every book lover knows well.

    The earliest use of the word dates to a Japanese satirical text from 1879, notes bibliographer Mori Senzo. It described a teacher whose shelves were packed with unread books. The word was a gentle joke, carrying no malice—a connotation that remains today. Professor Andrew Gerstle adds that “tsundoku” still carries no stigma in Japan.

    Tsundoku vs. Bibliomania: A meaningful distinction

    Both “tsundoku” and “bibliomania” involve collecting books, but the reasons behind them are different.

    “Bibliomania” describes an excessive obsession with collecting books, often for their rarity, beauty, or the pleasure of owning them rather than for reading. A bibliomaniac focuses on obtaining desirable volumes—such as first editions or illustrated works—valuing the collection itself above the books’ contents.

    tsundoku, japanese, books, reading, history
    A woman reads on a train. Photo credit: Canva

    “Tsundoku,” on the other hand, is about wanting to read the books you buy, even if you haven’t gotten to them yet. Maybe you picked up a book because a friend recommended it or because something new caught your eye. The stack grows not out of obsession but out of the hope that you’ll read them all someday.

    That difference matters. A “tsundoku” pile isn’t just a collection; it’s a sign of your curiosity and your goals. It shows not only who you are but who you want to be.

    Your brain on “tsundoku

    So why do we keep buying books when we have a pile of them we haven’t read yet? The answer has a lot to do with how our brains work.

    Buying a new book triggers a dopamine release, the same neurochemical associated with anticipation. The pleasure hits the moment your credit card is swiped. Reading can wait, but “later” often never comes.

    Your unread books are like little promises to yourself. They represent the “aspirational self.” Each one is a version of you who has finally read Anna Karenina, finished The Secret Lives of Color, or learned something new from The Trauma of Everyday Life. That future self feels close, just waiting for you to catch up. So the pile grows, full of hope and possibility.

    There’s nothing wrong with wanting to learn more, even if your curiosity sometimes outpaces your reading speed. The desire for new ideas is a good thing.

    The “antilibrary” concept

    Italian novelist and philosopher Umberto Eco practiced a more extreme version of this habit. His personal library contained more than 30,000 books, most of which he hadn’t read. Eco celebrated it. He referred to his collection of unread books as an “antilibrary”—a clear reminder of all the knowledge he had yet to discover.

    tsundoku, japanese, books, reading, history
    Every unread book on your shelf is a little promise to yourself. Photo credit: Canva

    Nassim Nicholas Taleb, author of The Black Swan, expanded on Eco’s idea of an antilibrary. He argued that you should maximize your library’s space by keeping books on topics you know little about. “Let us call this collection of unread books an antilibrary,” he says.

    An antilibrary is a “memento sciendi”—a representation of all you have yet to learn. Rather than a failure, a shelf of unread books signals intellectual humility: “I know what I don’t know and want to learn more.”

    Tsundoku” meets the modern world

    “Tsundoku” is now found far from Japan. The idea lives on in gaming culture, where players build libraries of unplayed games on platforms like Steam—sometimes dubbed “Steamdoku.” As cartoonist Ronnie Filyaw put it, “Tsundoku is collecting books you won’t read. Steamdoku is your Steam library.”

    Then there’s BookTok, TikTok’s beloved part of the Internet dedicated to all things literary. On BookTok, reading is a shared social experience. Creators turn the act of collecting books into engaging content, often filming their towering “to-be-read” (TBR) piles. Here, an unread stack becomes a form of individual expression and a way to connect with fellow book lovers.

    This digital domain has had a remarkable impact on the publishing world. NPD BookScan reports that a group of writers rule BookTok and have enjoyed lucrative rewards: 80 authors with large BookTok followings saw their collective sales more than double in one year, rising from nine million copies in 2020 to 20 million in 2021.

    The irony, of course, is that the gap between books bought and books read may be wider than ever. Despite the boom in book buying, reading is on the decline. A survey from the National Endowment for the Arts found that only 48.5% of American adults read at least one book in 2022. That’s a noticeable drop from 52.7% in 2017 and 54.6% in 2012. The numbers for fiction are even more stark, with just 37.6% of adults reading a novel in 2022—the lowest rate in the survey’s 30-year history.

    “Tsundoku” lives in the space between wanting to read and actually finding the time to do it. Life gets busy, but the desire to read and keep learning is always there. Your bookshelf is waiting, ready for you to choose a book and begin.

    Embracing “tsundoku” as an act of optimism

    Remember, every unread book on your shelf is a promise to your future self. Each perfect, unbent spine represents an inquisitiveness that hasn’t found its moment yet.

    At its core, “tsundoku” is about optimism. Every new book you buy shows you believe there will be time for new ideas. The world is full of stories, and there’s always more to learn.

    So the next time someone questions your growing stack of books, remember: there’s a name for your habit. Book lovers in Japan have used it for over a century. You’re not alone in believing that, one day, those books will be read.

    And if some books stay unread? That’s okay. The pile is still proof of your curiosity and your commitment to keep growing. “Tsundoku” is a sign of hope and the drive to learn, not a sign of failure.

  • When picking teams in gym class, a kid went rogue with who he chose first. It was life-changing.
    An act of kindness in gym class made a lasting impact.Photo credit: Canva
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    When picking teams in gym class, a kid went rogue with who he chose first. It was life-changing.

    Gym class may be the easiest class for some kids in school, but for others, it’s the roughest. For the not-athletically-inclined, P.E. can feel like torture, both physically and psychologically. Oliver Foit was one of the kids for whom gym class was fine. But he recognized that wasn’t the case for all. He shared a…

    Gym class may be the easiest class for some kids in school, but for others, it’s the roughest. For the not-athletically-inclined, P.E. can feel like torture, both physically and psychologically.

    Oliver Foit was one of the kids for whom gym class was fine. But he recognized that wasn’t the case for all. He shared a story about a gym class experience when he was 14 that he said changed the way he treated people for the rest of his life.

    “I remember I was in gym class and my teacher had chosen me to be one of the captains to pick teams for basketball,” he shared in an Instagram video. “And I remember I was getting ready to make my pick, and I was standing up in front of everyone. And before I did, I saw this girl that was sitting in the back of the class, and she usually got picked last. She was a little bit heavier set, wasn’t really super coordinated, wasn’t really into sports, which is fine. I called her name, and I remember she looked up and was like, ‘Me?’”

    Foit said his friend, the other captain, leaned over to him and asked, “Why’d you pick her?” Foit responded, “Why not?”

    The girl came up and stood right behind Foit. He told her to stand next to him since she was on his team.

    “She stood next to me, and I remember my friend was getting ready to pick whoever he was going to pick. And I remember she whispered something in my ear that I’ll never forget. She leaned over and said, ‘Are you sure?’ And it kind of hit me. I looked over at her, and I said, ‘Absolutely.’”

    A girl sits away from the group, appearing to be left out in gym glass
    Look around to see who might be feeling left out. Photo credit: Canva

    It was a rogue decision. Competition means picking the best athletes first, right? Everyone knows that. But this wasn’t an NBA coach choosing players for a professional sports team—it was P.E. class.

    From that moment on, Foit picked the kids who normally didn’t get picked to join his team. It paid off.

    “That gym class was one of the most fun gym classes I’ve ever had in my life,” Foit said. “Because I remember it wasn’t about trying to prove something or having your friends competing or anything like that. It was seriously about just having fun and including people…it was so fun. And I didn’t shoot one time, I was just passing the ball the whole time, and it was so fun.”

    That was his freshman year. Fast forward to graduation. After the ceremony, the girl from gym class four years earlier approached him and grabbed his arm.

    Two graduates talking to one another at graduation
    The impact of a kind act can last for years. Photo credit: Canva

    “She looked at me, and she said, ‘Oliver, I still remember when you picked me first when we played basketball in ninth grade.’ And I was like, ‘Really? I remember that too.’ And she’s like, ‘That was the only time I was picked first for anything in school.’ And that hit me really hard.”

    Years later, that act of kindness still meant something to her. Foit said he shared the story in the hope that it might inspire people to be kind and more aware of those around them.

    “It takes so little to be kind to someone, but it makes such a big impact on them,” he said. “Include people. That’s what the world’s about. It’s about including people and being kind to them.”

    A group of kids of different sizes and ages together holding basketballs
    Including everyone can have a lasting effect. Photo credit: Canva

    The story did inspire people, both from the perspective of someone who experienced the impact of being kind and from those on the receiving end of that kindness. Here’s what people are saying in the comments:

    “Being a good person is more rewarding and enriching than anyone could imagine. It is life changing for the person doing the deed as much as it is for the person it done for.”

    “You are so awesome. I was that girl in high school. I wish I knew someone like you then.”

    “In school, I was always picked last and bullied for just existing. After I broke out of that shell and gained confidence, I made it a point to make those still in their shells feel welcome & included. Thinking back, it’s amazing how sometimes it only takes one person to crack that shell.”

    “I was a skinny, sickly version of that girl. I remember kids arguing over who had to take me for PE. More than once, I was part of a 2-for-1 deal after all the other kids were picked. I’m 60, and I haven’t forgotten. Bless you, Oliver. ❤️”

    “As a girl who also was always picked last in school… thank you. I have no doubt that small gesture impacted and changed her in ways you’ll never know. ❤️”

    “From every ‘last picked in gym class’ kid, thank you. I guarantee you that she still thinks about this moment to this day. I know I would.”

    “This made me cry. I was always picked last. That would’ve changed my life if I was her.”

    “At my 30th reunion last summer, a woman walked up to me and hugged me tight. She said to her husband who I hadn’t yet met, that I was nice to her in high school. I was taken back for a moment bc she was this girl in the back of gym who was probably never chosen. I smiled and responded with ‘Of course. We were friends. You were so easy to love.’ We both cried. I hope your feed finds as many people as possible.”

    Even Katie Couric responded: “Okay Oliver. I love you. You’re so right. Pick the person who might get picked last. Go talk to the person at the dance who is alone and looks uncomfortable. Ask the new kid to sit at your table for lunch. Simple, seemingly small acts of kindness make a huge difference. You are going to be a successful human. ❤️”

    It was a simple but beautiful reminder of the power of a kind act. (And perhaps an indication that we should stop picking teams this way in gym class?)

    You can follow Oliver Foit on Instagram.

  • Man’s unexplained beef with the solar system is keeping people laughing and learning
    A grumpy man (left). The solar system (right). Photo credit: Canva
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    Man’s unexplained beef with the solar system is keeping people laughing and learning

    People are allowed to dislike whatever they want, but sometimes that comes with questions. Tyreak, who runs the Instagram account Tyreak Told You, has a peculiar beef that often leaves people laughing and scratching their heads. The New Yorker spends some of his free time disliking the universe, but the planets within our solar system…

    People are allowed to dislike whatever they want, but sometimes that comes with questions. Tyreak, who runs the Instagram account Tyreak Told You, has a peculiar beef that often leaves people laughing and scratching their heads. The New Yorker spends some of his free time disliking the universe, but the planets within our solar system take the brunt of his disdain.

    It’s unclear why he doesn’t like the planets, but he makes it his mission to roast them. No planet’s feelings are spared when Tyreak gets fired up about whatever new information he has just learned about them. His research into space and the deadpan delivery of his annoyance with the planets have people learning while laughing.

    solar system, angry, science, astronomy, education, funny
    The Sun and the planets. Photo credit: Canva

    Some planets in his crosshairs take a little more heat than others. Parents may want to preview any video before showing it to their child to take note of any profanity. In his amusing takedown of Jupiter, he uses colorful language while trying to figure out what happens to the planets Jupiter eats. Yes, scientists have discovered that the large planet may be expanding after consuming smaller planets. That news just didn’t sit right with the space critic.

    “Can you believe that Jupiter just gave me another reason to not like it? Look at this,” Tyreak says. “Jupiter may have grown by swallowing baby planets reveals a new study. I told y’all Jupiter was morbidly obese. Jupiter just overeats. Jupiter never gets full. You can’t satisfy Jupiter. Jupiter just eats everything around it. That’s why it’s so big. That’s why it looks like that. These are stretch marks.”

    He goes on to talk about the 95 moons orbiting Jupiter before asking whether the planet poops. A logical question after finding out it eats other planets. But don’t worry, other unsuspecting planets aren’t escaping his amusingly nonsensical ire for their existence.

    In another video, he petitions to exile Mercury from the solar system because it’s dead.

    “We shouldn’t have dead planets just rotting away in our solar system. Isn’t that like some type of health code violation?” Tyreak asks. “You have dead planets just chilling out in the solar system? Like, what does it smell like? Do you think Mercury smells worse than Saturn? Cause Saturn has a bunch of ammonia crystals, so that whole planet probably smells like pee.”

    He calls Saturn a “giant UTI” before moving on to explain Mercury’s distance from the Sun, the reason it may be shrinking, and information about its core.

    Commenters can’t get enough of his series about why he dislikes the planets and the universe as a whole.

    One person writes, “I love this series. It’s giving Tyreak DeGrasse Tyson.”

    Another person adds, “My dude got beef with the Galaxy.”

    “So Mercury is a planet but Pluto isn’t?? Feels racist somehow,” someone jokes.

    One person conjures a horrifying image of Jupiter, saying, “I bet you Jupiter’s mouth is that red super hurricane! It just sucks those planets in. Horrifying!”

    Jupiter is a honey badger, and honey badgers don’t care, says this person: “Jupiter is out here behaving like a Honey Badger.”

    Someone else is proving that Tyreak is educating viewers one annoyed planet video at a time: “I haven’t been this invested in science since Miss Frizzle and Bill NYE.”

    “Please never stop doing these. They bring me so much joy and laughter, for real,” one person swears. Another says the videos belong on TV: “This is PBS Science documentary worthy commentary.”

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