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There’s a community in Ethiopia where everyone lives as equals. And it works.

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Imagine a place where men and women are treated completely equally.

They share duties as co-heads of a household. Work duties and interests are not determined by gender, but by ability. The community works together, generating enough income to fulfill its needs and splitting the profits equally among all members. Contraception is available to women who want it.

A young woman in Awra Amba. All photos via the creative agency Write This Down, used with permission.


And it gets even better: Children go to school from the age of 3. Both boys and girls. They get the chance to be kids. Once they’re 18, they’re free to decide what they want to do with their lives. The minimum age for marriage is 19 for women and 20 for men. Women feel no shame proposing to men because there’s no invisible power structure to adhere to. The social standard is equality.

It might sound too good to be true — but it isn’t.

For over 40 years, Awra Amba has functioned as a small, egalitarian community in Ethiopia. There are around 500 community members who wake up each day with a simple mission: to work hard and treat each other fairly and as equals.

It all started with one man: Zumra Nuru. Nuru grew up in a small village in Ethiopia. He saw that inequality was baked into a lot of the traditions. Like the accepted norm in many Western countries, women in the village he lived in were expected to be both providers and caretakers. They worked during the day and tended to the house and the children at night. The same wasn’t expected of men.

A smiling little boy in Awra Amba.

It didn’t feel right. So he started to ask questions.

In an interview with filmmakers Paulina Tervo and Serdar Ferit, Nuru recalls asking, "Why is there a difference between them? Women are like servants; men are like masters. When I questioned this, my family would say, 'You want to be different from others.'" It wasn’t a compliment, but he felt confident that men and women could and should live as equals.

Nuru founded a community called Awra Amba where equality is the norm.

Initially, he was met with resistance. Like Nuru’s family, many of Awra Amba’s neighbors were skeptical of the community. They misunderstood Awra Amba’s way of life. But when faced with violent opposition, the Awra Ambans have reacted by extending their hands in peace.

They’ve built schoolhouses and encourage the kids from surrounding villages to attend because they believe that education is power. They engage in dialogue with their neighbors to teach them about the Awra Amban way of life to reduce fear and encourage understanding.

Image of a schoolhouse built by the Awra Amba community.

And the women who move to Awra Amba appreciate the chance to take the reigns in their own lives. Zeinab, a woman who lives in the village, told the filmmakers, "Before I came to Awra Amba, I was uneducated and oppressed. I didn't know about my rights. In our time, there was nothing called 'men's and women's rights.' Men oppressed women. They were superior to us."  For many years, she ran the teahouse in the village, and with her support, her adult daughter joined the Awra Amba community. They are in control of their own fate.

The Awra Ambans have also worked hard to become self-sustaining and have been successful at it — they do not accept food aid from organizations. They do accept financial support for projects, like a mill, which helps them and their neighbors to be increasingly self-sufficient. No one has more than any other person. They all work hard, and they all reap the rewards. As their way of life has proven successful, they’ve become a model for neighboring villages.

Tervo, the filmmaker, first traveled to Awra Amba in 2004. It was an experience she couldn’t forget.

She returned home and told fellow filmmaker Ferit, her boyfriend at the time, that they had to return and make a documentary about the people. Little did they know that helping Awra Amba to tell its story would becoming such a big part of their lives.

Tervo and Ferit with Nuru and other members of the Awra Amba community.

Over the years, they’ve seen the community evolve rapidly, and they say that the egalitarian principles on which it’s founded have only strengthened with each generation. And most importantly, they’ve helped the Awra Amban people to use own their voice and tell their story.

They plan to launch "The Awra Amba Experience" soon; it's an interactive documentary that allows viewers to get a look inside the village and hear from community members themselves. Tervo explains that this project "basically started from the desire of the community to speak to the outside world ... they wanted to tell their story."

Here’s a sneak peek:

Awra Amba is an incredible example of what can happen when we all champion each other.

As we in the Western world continue to work to ensure that women aren’t limited by assumptions about gender, are paid as much as men, and allowed to take control of their own bodies, it’s neat to be reminded that this massive goal is possible.

The glass ceiling can be shattered. And there’s a village in Ethiopia that can help show us the way.

John Mainstone was the custodian of the Pitch Drop Experiment for 52 years.

Because we use water all the time, most of us have an intuitive sense of how long it takes a drop of water to form and fall. More viscous liquids, like oil or shampoo or honey, drop more slowly depending on how thick they are, which can vary depending on concentration, temperature and more. If you've ever tried pouring molasses, you know why it's used as a metaphor for something moving very slowly, but we can easily see a drop of any of those liquids form and fall in a matter of seconds.

But what about the most viscous substance in the world? How long does it take to form a falling drop? A few minutes? An hour? A day?

How about somewhere between 7 and 13 years?

pitch drop experiment, tar pitch, solid or liquid, physics, world's longest experimentPitch moves so slowly it can't be seen to be moving with the naked eye until it prepares to drop. Battery for size reference.John Mainstone/University of Queensland

The Pitch Drop Experiment began in 1927 with a scientist who had a hunch. Thomas Parnell, a physicist at the University of Queensland in Australia, believed that tar pitch, which appears to be a solid and shatters like glass when hit with a hammer at room temperature, is actually a liquid. So he set up an experiment that would become the longest-running—and the world's slowest—experiment on Earth to test his hypothesis.

Parnell poured molten pitch it into a funnel shaped container, then let it settle and cool for three years. That was just to get the experiment set up so it could begin. Then he opened a hole at the bottom of the funnel to see how long it would take for the pitch to ooze through it, form a droplet, and drop from its source.

It took eight years for the first drop to fall. Nine years for the second. Those were the only two drops Parnell was alive for before he passed away in 1948.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

In total, there have been nine pitch drops in the University of Queensland experiment. The first seven drops fell between 7 and 9 years apart, but when air conditioning was added to the building after the seventh drop, the amount of time between drops increased significantly. The drops in 2000 and 2014 happened approximately 13 years after the preceding one. (The funnel is set up as a demonstration with no special environmental controls, so the seasons and conditions of the building can easily affect the flow of the pitch.)

The next drop is anticipated to fall sometime in the 2020s.

pitch drop experiment, tar pitch, solid or liquid, physics, world's longest experimentThe first seven drops fell around 8 years apart. Then the building got air conditioning and the intervals changed to around 13 years.RicHard-59

Though Parnell proved his hypothesis well before the first drop even fell, the experiment continued to help scientists study and measure the viscosity of tar pitch. The thickest liquid substance in the world, pitch is estimated to be 2 million times more viscous than honey and 20 billion times the viscosity of water. No wonder it takes so ridiculously long to drop.

One of the most interesting parts of the Pitch Drop Experiment is that in the no one has ever actually witnessed one of the drops falling at the Queensland site. The drops, ironically, happen rather quickly when they do finally happen, and every time there was some odd circumstance that kept anyone from seeing them take place.

The Queensland pitch drop funnel is no longer the only one in existence, however. In 2013, Trinity College in Dublin, Ireland, managed to capture its own pitch drop on camera. You can see how it looks as if nothing is happening right up until the final seconds when it falls.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Today, however, with the internet and modern technology, it's likely that many people will be able to witness the next drop when it happens. The University of Queensland has set up a livestream of the Pitch Drop Experiment, which you can access here, though watching the pitch move more slowly than the naked eye can detect is about as exciting as watching paint dry.

But one day, within a matter of seconds, it will drop, hopefully with some amount of predictability as to the approximate day at least. How many people are going to be watching a livestream for years, waiting for it to happen?

PoorJohn Mainstone was the custodian of the experiment for 52 years, from 1961 to 2013. Sadly, he never got to witness any of the five drops that took place during his tenure. Neither did Parnell himself with the two that took place while he was alive.

John Mainstone, pitch drop experiment, university of queensland, physicsJohn Mainstone, the second custodian of the Pitch Drop Experiment, with the funnel in 1990.John Mainstone, University of Queensland

Sometimes science is looks like an explosive chemical reaction and sometimes it's a long game of waiting and observing at the speed of nature. And when it comes to pitch dripping through a funnel, the speed of nature is about as slow as it gets.


Joy

Woman makes a show out of timing how long it actually takes to do tasks she puts off doing

She's being hailed the "more relatable, Marie Kondo" for how she inspires people to tackle their own put off tasks.

@christinewrutzen/TikTok

Not all heroes wear capes.

We can all be guilty of convincing ourselves that certain tasks will take wayyyyyyy longer than they actually do. Those mountainous piles of clothes that need to be folded (or is it washed? who can tell anymore), the fridge that desperately needs old condiments thrown out, removing whatever entity is behind that couch…

No matter what chore we’re procrastinating on, odds are we are making it way more herculean than it actually is. And now, thanks to one brave—and very entertaining—soul, we have definitive proof.

In her super-viral TikTok series titled “How Long Does It Actually Take,” fellow procrastinator Christi Newrutzen dons a pair of sunglasses, comfy clothes, and a newscaster-worthy microphone as she times herself doing dull tasks she’s put off…some upwards of a couple of years.

It’s really the perfect combo of charming deadpan delivery, relatability, and eye-opening discoveries that make these videos so impactful. In the clip below, Newrutzen puts away two loads of laundry, which she had been putting off for 11 days.

Armed with her laptop (because she always has to watch something while doing laundry) Newrutzen managed to do it all in just 28 minutes.

@christinewrutzen I dont know if it looks like it but it was in fact 2 loads of laundry 😂 and I always have to be watching something while I put away laundry otherwise it's like a death sentence 🥲 #cleantok #laundry #homeimprovement #clothes #adhd#executivedysfunction #organization ♬ Boss Bitch - Doja Cat

In another video, Newrutzen finally schedules a dentist appointment. After three years of avoiding it, the whole thing only took nine minutes.

@christinewrutzen i dont know why this took me soooooooo long to do, but MAN do I feel so much better now, please don't judge me, this was hard 🥲 #procrastination #dentist #appointment #cleantok #organization #adhd #executivedysfunction #homeimprovement ♬ original sound - Christi Newrutzen

Newrutzen also handles bigger tasks, like organizing the garage. This did end up taking a little over an hour. But considering the shelves have apparently “never not looked like this,” it’s still safe to assume this was undeniably less taxing than she assumed it would be.

@christinewrutzen This one took me out, I was really not feeling it by the end 😩 ill have to take out all that stuff to the dumpster later 😅 #cleantok #cleaning #organizing #garage #procrastination ♬ two - bbno$

Newrutzen’s longest task to date seems to be repainting a chest of drawers she bought discounted in hopes of refurbishing. It was a project she started two years ago, and hadn’t touched since. This technically took her 23 hours, including waiting for paint to dry and whatnot. But the actual time spent working on said project was an hour and four minutes.

If this is inspiring you to finally conquer your own ever ending to-do list, you’re not alone. So many people shared how Newrutzen’s videos gave them the gumption to tackle their chores. Lo and behold, they made the same discoveries she did!

“I timed how long it took me to match the freaking socks last night,” one viewer wrote. “Because of you, I found out it only takes me 15 minutes!! I swore it was an hour long deal.”

“I’ve been staring at a mess in my hallway for about a week now trying to get myself to clean it up and because of your video I did it this morning and it took a total of 42 seconds,” another shared. “42 seconds!!!!!!”

Others just chimed in to praise Newrutzen for her contribution.

“You are the new, more relatable, Marie Kondo,” one person gushed.

“You're gently and comically reminding us that the giant, foreboding thing in the corner that we've been dreading for months is not THAT bad if we just do it ✨ TYSM,” said another.

productivity, marie kondo, getting things done, to do list, chores, procrastination An assortment of stick notes on a car steering wheelImage via Canva

Newrutzen told Upworthy that the response to her series has equally inspired her to do more.

"It feels incredible to know my videos are having this kind of impact on people and also I am finally getting stuff done that I've needed to do for years," she said, adding that she continues surprising herself with how quickly she gets certain tasks done. Unloading the dishes, for example, took around 5 minutes. "Dishes are literally the bane of my existence but seeing it through that perspective has helped me a lot!"

Next time you find yourself putting off that thing (you know the one), remind yourself that it likely won’t take nearly as long as your brain tells you it will. Maybe even take a page from Newrutzen’s book and time yourself doing it to get that hard data. Because, even though perfection is impossible, having something so minuscule take over valuable brain space is just plain stressful…more stressful than actually doing the thing.

All illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.

It's hard to truly describe the amazing bond between dads and their daughters.

Being a dad is an amazing job no matter the gender of the tiny humans we're raising. But there's something unique about the bond between fathers and daughters. Most dads know what it's like to struggle with braiding hair, but we also know that bonding time provides immense value to our daughters. In fact, studies have shown that women with actively involved fathers are more confident and more successful in school and business.

You know how a picture is worth a thousand words? I'll just let these images sum up the daddy-daughter bond.

A 37-year-old Ukrainian artist affectionately known as Soosh, recently created some ridiculously heartwarming illustrations of the bond between a dad and his daughter, and put them on her Instagram feed. Sadly, her father wasn't involved in her life when she was a kid. But she wants to be sure her 9-year-old son doesn't follow in those footsteps.

"Part of the education for my kiddo who I want to grow up to be a good man is to understand what it's like to be one," Soosh told Upworthy.

There are so many different ways that fathers demonstrate their love for their little girls, and Soosh pretty much nails all of them.

Get ready to run the full gamut of the feels.

1. Dads can do it all. Including hair.

parenting, dads, daughters, fathers, art, artworkA father does his daughter's hairAll illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.

2. They also make pretty great game opponents.



parenting, dads, daughters, fathers, art, artwork, chessA father plays chess with his daughterAll illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.

3. And the Hula-Hoop skills? Legendary.



parenting, dads, daughters, fathers, art, artwork, hula hoopA dad hula hoops with his daughterAll illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.

4. Dads know there's always time for a tea party regardless of the mountain of work in front of them.



A dad talks to his daughter while working at his deskAll illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.


5. And their puppeteer skills totally belong on Broadway.



A dad performs a puppet show for his daughterAll illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.


6. Dads help us see the world from different views.



A dad walks with his daughter on his backAll illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.


7. So much so that we never want them to leave.



a dad carries a suitcase that his daughter holds ontoAll illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.


8. They can make us feel protected, valued, and loved.



A dad holds his sleeping daughterAll illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.


9. Especially when there are monsters hiding in places they shouldn't.



A superhero dad looks over his daughterAll illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.


10. Seeing the daddy-daughter bond as art perfectly shows how beautiful fatherhood can be.



A dad takes the small corner of the bed with his dauthterAll illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.


This article originally appeared nine years ago.

Modern Families

Mom calls out unfair 'double standard' of boomer grandparents who don't help with childcare

"I love my mom dearly, but I'm surprised at how little effort she puts in."

A stressed mom and her happy, busy parents.

As far as generational stereotypes go, baby boomers (1946 to 1964) have often been accused of being a self-absorbed generation that has had no problem hoarding wealth, disregarding the environment, and prioritizing their own interests over their families. After all, they’re the generation that predominantly raised Gen X (1965 to 1980) and older millennials ('80s babies), also known as Gen Goonie, who were the least parented group of people in decades.

It’s unfair to paint an entire generation with the same brush. Still, the people who were once called the “Me Generation” are developing a reputation for being less involved in their grandchildren’s lives than their parents. The different grandparenting styles have been attributed to the fact that boomers worked longer and therefore want to enjoy their retirement. They also have more money than their parents to enjoy traveling and pursuing their hobbies. Those looking to take shots at boomers claim that they didn’t put a lot of effort into raising their kids, so why would they be any different with their grandkids?

boomers, grandparents, absentee grandparents, milennials, grandpa, grandmaBaby boomer grandparents.via Canva/Photos

A mother of one, who goes by TheCalmQuail on Mumsnet (a UK-based mothers' forum), made a controversial post, calling out a significant double standard when it comes to boomers. They had no problem having their parents help raise their kids, but they don’t want to extend the same courtesy to their children.

“It's come up in a few conversations with other parents recently about how little time their parents spend with their children, especially in comparison to when they were younger and at their grandparents' daily,” CalmQuail wrote. “Myself included, I avoided nursery completely when my mother went back to work because free daily childcare from a relative, and some of my happiest regular memories are spending regular one-on-one time with my Nana.”

“I realise grandparents are entitled to their own lives, but the lack of help does seem like double standards, when a large majority have seemingly had so much help themselves,” she continued.

stressed mom, young mom, stressed millennial, woman hands on her head, woman on couchA stressed mom with her head in her hands.via Canva/Photos

CalmQuail added that her mother lives up the road from her but still finds excuses not to help our child or even spend time with her kid. “It often feels like she's an extra toddler, as I have to suggest stuff to tempt her to do anything together; I manage the logistics, drive her there, etc. She will be there for emergency childcare requests when possible,” she continued. At the end of her post, she asked whether she was being unreasonable for thinking that her parents should put as much effort into raising their grandchildren as they had put into raising their parents.

The verdict: 68% thought she was NOT being unreasonable, and 32% felt that she was being unreasonable. Therefore, a majority of parents on the forum believe that Baby Boomers have the same responsibility to their grandchildren as the Silent Generation (1928 to 1945) did to theirs.

Many parents on the forum have experienced similar situations with their boomer parents and have given them a little grace by acknowledging that their grandparents didn’t have many resources or retirement expectations, so they dedicated their energy to their families.

stressed woman, tired mom, woman doing laundry, woman needs help, crying woman, folding laundryA stressed mom doing laundry.via Canva/Photos

“I know this will turn into a boomer bashing thread but my experience is my parents and their friends are early retirees with a fair bit of cash and feel they’ve earnt a nice easy long comfortable retirement (they have worked hard but only the same as us except we can’t afford a nanny, cleaner etc like they did…).so they’re busy on holidays, golfing, socialising,” a commenter wrote. “My grandparents were typical of their generation—very hard working, modest life, and incredibly family orientated, they had us every holiday.”

“I don’t think my grandparents had much in the way of expectations of retirement,” another commenter added. “They retired relatively early by today’s standards, and lived far longer than they expected. There wasn’t much of a sense of ‘enjoying your retirement’ by jetting off around the world or pursuing personal hobbies - they were always there and available.”

Ultimately, there’s nothing wrong with baby boomers enjoying their retirement, but their children have a right to feel a bit miffed by the shift in grandparenting priorities. As times change, so do expectations, but why does it feel like younger people are always getting the short end of the stick when it comes to life's necessities, such as childcare and the cost of living? Unfortunately, so many younger people feel like they have to go it alone. However, kudos to the boomer grandparents who do help out with childcare, just as their parents did. As they say, it takes a village to raise a child, and these days, our villages need to be growing instead of shrinking.

Movies

How the unscripted hand flex in 'Pride and Prejudice' became an iconic romantic moment

This subtle, two-second scene has had women swooning for 20 years.

Mr. Darcy's hand flex packs a huge romantic wallop.

When we think of romantic moments in film, some classic scenes come to mind. Billy Crystal yelling his love at Meg Ryan on New Year's Eve in When Harry Met Sally. The much-spoofed "I'm flying" scene in Titanic.The cheesy-but-effective "You had me at hello" line in Jerry Maguire. We watch romantic movies for precisely these interactions that allow us to live vicariously through the characters and feel the chemical rush of falling in love.

Romantic scenes generally include a declaration of love, a passionate embrace or kiss, or some other overt expression of affection and desire. But one romantic scene that involves none of those things has become an iconic fan favorite despite it just being a brief close-up shot of a hand.

The "hand flex" from Joe Wright's 2005 adaptation of Jane Austen's Pride & Prejudicesays more in two seconds than many entire scenes do, which is what makes it so powerful. Some people even call it the sexiest non-sex scene in cinema.

In the scene, Mr. Darcy (played by Matthew MacFadyen) briefly takes Elizabeth Bennett's (played by Keira Knightley) hand to help her into a carriage. At this point in the story, the two characters have been prickly toward one another after getting off on the wrong foot, though their attraction is becoming palpable. For the quickest of moments, their hands touch and their eyes meet, and there's an unspoken flash of recognition. Then, as Darcy walks away from the carriage, he flexes his hand—literally for two seconds—and despite it being the slightest gesture that no one would even notice in real life, it speaks volumes about what he's feeling.

Chemistry. Electricity. Longing. Tension. It's all right there in his outstretched fingertips.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Director Joe Wright shared with PEOPLE how the scene came about.

"It wasn't in the script, but that was an important moment in the book," Wright said. "This sudden realization, as they were parting, of what they meant to each other or the kind of disturbance they caused in each other."

Wright said the hand stretch was an improvised move by MacFadyen's, though MacFadyen has said that Wright was the one who initially noticed him doing it.

""Our bodies are so much smarter than our minds often," Wright told PEOPLE. "Although their conscious minds are fighting against each other, their bodies are two magnets drawn to each other. As they touch, even that little hand lifting helping her, which is pure etiquette of the period, somehow creates this kind of electronic shock wave through them both, and he has to shake it away."

pride and prejudice, mr. darcy, elizabeth bennett, film, love scenePride And Prejudice GIF by Working TitleGiphy

Those electrical pulses of sheer chemistry are visceral when they happen in real life, and in that simple stretching of his fingers we can all feel it. Ironically, however, Wright had been disappointed with that day's filming, feeling like he hadn't captured what he hoped to in the scene.

"It had been a gloomy day when we shot it," Wright told PEOPLE. "I felt like I hadn't conveyed what I wanted to, and it's odd and gratifying to find that we told our story, and people have responded. Because on the day, I thought, 'Oh no, we didn't get it. It was rubbish. It didn't work.' Now, people are still posting it. It's odd and really nice."

hands, scene, pride and prejudice, hand scene, mr. darcy, film Pride & PrejudiceGiphy

Imagine thinking that scene hadn't worked. So many people really do doubt themselves more than they should, eh? As people's commentary makes clear, the scene is perfection.

"This is my favourite minute of acting from all the films I've seen over my 57 years."

"That's it. This is more intimate than other scenes from romance movies."

"I'm watching this movie for the first time (shocker i know), and this scene is so intensely romantic it's crazy—more intimate than full body contact. I think it's because of how they filmed it, all close-up shots."

"Like an electric current ran from her to him and the only way he could express what teaching her means is that hand-flex. That’s how you tell a whole story with one gesture. Swoooonniing."

"Tell me you want me without saying a word. This IS most women's dreams."

"I always come back to this scene IT SHOOOK ME."

"This scene has its own separate fan base."

Fans can see the hand flex on the big screen for the film's 20th anniversary as it will be re-released in select theaters on April 20, 2025. It's worth a trip to the movie theater, as the 2005 Pride & Prejudice has a gorgeous aesthetic that is enhanced on a larger screen. Joe Wright really did know what he was doing with this film from start to finish, hand flex and all.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com