A theory that The Golden Girls were an 'organized crime syndicate' is hilariously plausible
If you don't follow Michael Harriot in some capacity, you're seriously missing out. Not only is the writer from The Root a critically acclaimed poet, journalist, novelist, and broadcaster, but he also has a smart, culturally sharp, and sometimes unexpected sense of humor.
Case in point: He's made a compelling case on Twitter that The Golden Girls—yes, the four old ladies from the 1980s TV show—were actually part of an organized crime syndicate. It's an admittedly wild and silly ride that has you laughing at first. But by the end of the thread, you're like, "Hahaha, whoa. He could totally be right."
Harriot wrote:
"This might be the most controversial thing I ever tweeted but it's time America faces the truth about a group of beloved historical figures, so here goes:
Blanche, Dorothy, Rose & Sophia—The Golden Girls—were actually members of an organized crime syndicate.
A thread:
Y'all probably think they were innocent widowers because that's what they WANT you to think. Nah, these women were gangsters.
The Golden Girls debuted in 1985, right at the beginning of the crack cocaine epidemic.
They moved there to "push that weight." The muscle of the organization was provided by Rose, (or as we called her, "Ruthless" Rose Nyland. Rose acted innocent & sweet but she wasn't as dumb as she pretended.
She claimed her husband died but anyone with 2 eyes can see she killed her husband for the insurance money. First of all, who moves from St. Olaf Minn. to Miami to save money?
No one, unless you have a plug for that Colombian nose candy.
So she moves down there and meets Blanche "The Butcher" Devereaux, whose family made their money in the sex trade and dope game. Wait...Y'all knew Blanche's daddy was a pimp, right? I mean, he wore a white pimp suit, hat and even talked like a pimp.
They said he owned a "plantation" outside of ATL where Blanche grew up but it sounds like they were selling & growing more than that.
Blanche's father "Big Daddy" comes in for a visityoutu.be
He had an unnatural relationship with Blanche that always bothered me & his name was literally "Big Daddy!"
Bruh, that's a pimp. But in the mid-80s Atlanta was getting blacker and blacker, so he sent Blanche down to Miami to move his "crops."
Where would Blanche meet people rich enough to spend that kind of $$? How could she move that kind of weight in & out of the country?
Do you remember Blanche's job? She was an ART DEALER.
That's the perfect cover. First of all, Ppl in Fla. ain't buying art like that unless it's velvet. Secondly, it's a known fact that 72% of art dealers belong to a cartel.
But they needed someone smart & tough enough to handle the day-to-day business."Dangerous" Dorothy Zoomak.
She was smart, tough, down on her luck, nothing to lose and built like an outside linebacker who sometimes played safety in the nickel defense.
Dorothy didn't take no shit. She taught in inner city NYC schools during the 70s so she spoke Spanish. Plus, her voice was so deep, the Columbian probably thought Luther Vandross or James Earl Jones was on the phone when she called them. Now, if course, you need respect, a distribution network and connections to let people know not to fuck with you.
Sophia "She'll Kill Ya" Petrillo.
Come on fam. Don't tell me y'all can't see this. First of all, she was Sicilian. And she talked mad shit. Plus, have y'all ever wondered why her nursing home burned down right when everyone moved in?
To keep the cops off their trail. It was a cover.
Don't forget, Golden Girls debuted 1 year after Miami Vice. So while Crockett & Tubbs we're locking people up, the Golden Girls were quietly running an international drug ring.
It's all right there if you open your 3rd eye.
Here's the final clue. Do you know how much money a person must have to assure ppl that if they threw a party and invited EVERYONE THEY KNEW, they'd STILL BE SURE that the biggest gift would be from the...
They even know what the card attached would say.
But, notice they never say what's inside the gift.
Cocaine, bruh.
Pure cocaine.
Thank you for being a friend."
Right?? But what's even better are the GIF and meme responses to the thread that back up everything Harriott just laid out.
We all need a little breather from the heaviness of the world from time to time. We can bake bread, we can look at kitten memes, or we can conjecture about the covert criminal activities of beloved 1980s sitcom characters.
Whatever gets you through the madness, man.
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An actual beaver dam on the now-thriving Price River
Not just coworkers—family, friends, strangers, kids…
Imagine having to go so badly but being out of euros. 
Anything hobbit-esque can't be wrong. 
But what if you need pain meds AND mascara?!
Imagine how this would affect childcare.
Honestly…where's the lie?
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Urgent dash to the bathroom! 🚪🏃♂️
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There's a reason why some people can perfectly copy accents, and others can't
Turns out, there's a neurodivergent link.
A woman in black long sleeve shirt stands in front of mirror.
Have you ever had that friend who goes on vacation for four days to London and comes back with a full-on Queen's English posh accent? "Oooh I left my brolly in the loo," they say, and you respond, "But you're from Colorado!" Well, there are reasons they (and many of us) do that, and usually it's on a pretty subconscious level.
It's called "accent mirroring," and it's actually quite common with people who are neurodivergent, particularly those with ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder). According Neurolaunch, the self-described "Free Mental Health Library," "Accent mirroring, also known as accent adaptation or phonetic convergence, is the tendency to unconsciously adopt the accent or speech patterns of those around us. This linguistic chameleon effect is not unique to individuals with ADHD, but it appears to be more pronounced and frequent in this population."
Essentially, when people have conversations, we're constantly "scanning" for information—not just the words we're absorbing, but the inflection and tone. "When we hear an accent, our brains automatically analyze and categorize the phonetic features, prosody, and intonation patterns," writes Neurolaunch. For most, this does result in copying the accent of the person with whom we're speaking. But those with ADHD might be more sensitive to auditory cues. This, "coupled with a reduced ability to filter out or inhibit the impulse to mimic…could potentially explain the increased tendency for accent mirroring."
While the article explains further research is needed, they distinctly state that, "Accent mirroring in individuals with ADHD often manifests as an unconscious mimicry of accents in social situations. This can range from subtle shifts in pronunciation to more noticeable changes in intonation and speech rhythm. For example, a person with ADHD might find themselves unconsciously adopting a Southern drawl when conversing with someone from Texas, even if they’ve never lived in the South themselves."
People are having their say online. On the subreddit r/ADHDWomen, a thread began: "Taking on accents is an ADHD thing?" The OP shares, "My whole life, I've picked up accents. I, myself, never noticed, but everyone around me would be like, 'Why are you talking like that??' It could be after I watched a show or movie with an accent or after I've traveled somewhere with a different accent than my 'normal.'
They continue, "Apparently, I pick it up fast, but it fades out slowly. Today... I'm scrolling Instagram, I watch a reel from a comedian couple (Darcy and Jeremy. IYKYK) about how Darcy (ADHD) picks up accents everywhere they go. It's called ADHD Mirroring??? And it's another way of masking."
(The OP is referring to Darcy Michaels and his husband Jeremy Baer, who are both touring comedians based in Canada.)
Hundreds of people on the Reddit thread alone seem to relate. One comments, "Omfg I've done this my whole life; I'll even pick up on the pauses/spaces when I'm talking to someone who is ESL—but English is my first language lol."
Sometimes, it can be a real issue for those around the chameleon. "I accidentally mimicked a waitress's weird laugh one time. As soon as she was out of earshot, my family started to reprimand me, but I was already like 'oh my god I don’t know why I did that, I feel so bad.'"
Many commenters on TikTok were shocked to find out this can be a sign of ADHD. One jokes, "Omg, yes, at a store the cashier was talking to me and she was French. She's like 'Oh are you French too? No, I'm not lol. I'm very east coast Canada."
And some people just embrace it and make it work for them. "I mirror their words or phrase! I’m 30. I realized I start calling everyone sweetie cause my manager does & I work at coffee shop."