The 50/50 method marriage hack will help you solve your biggest fight: What's for dinner?
How much do you really want it?

A couple debates over what to eat for dinner.
Sometimes, being married can feel like being one-half of a two-headed monster. You have to discuss and, often, debate every decision you make with the other person. This can get exhausting, especially when it involves small things such as what to eat for dinner, what color to paint the bathroom, or what movie to watch.
Oftentimes, these decisions can take forever because one person has an idea, such as, “Let’s go get Italian food tonight.” However, the other person says no without having any suggestions. This can result in a stalemate that lasts for far too long, all the while your belly begins to groan louder and louder.
What's the 50/50 method marriage hack?
Kira Kosarin, an actress and musician best known for starring in Nickelodeon’sThe Thundermans (2013-2018) and as Betsy Kelso on That ‘90s Show, has figured out a fun way to solve this marriage problem with her husband, actor-musician, Max Chester. They call it the 50/50 method.
@kirakosarin What’s your 50?
“My husband and I have a really great method for negotiating small things, like whether we wanna go out or stay in, or what we want for dinner, in a way that doesn't get you stuck in that awful loop where it's like, well, what do you wanna do?” Kosarin opens her video. “And it basically takes that conversation, and it turns it into numbers so that you can articulate what you would want selfishly and then also find common ground and make the decision based on what you now know truly the other person wants.”
Kira Kosarin at Moroccan Lounge in August 2022.via Justin Higuchi/Wikimedia Commons
How do married people choose what to eat for dinner?
Kosarin uses the example of a conversation about where to go for dinner. “One of us will go, ‘Hey, I can’t decide. What’s your 50?’ And I’ll go, ‘I’m leaning, like, 60% Thai, 40% Indian.’ And then maybe Max will go, ‘Ooh. I’m leaning, like, 10% Thai and 90% Indian.’”
Max would win in this scenario because he passionately wants Indian food. “Because even though I want Thai a little more, I now know you want Indian a lot more,” she says.
The 50/50 method is effective because it allows people to quantify their desire. In this case, Chester made it known that he wanted Indian food instead of just kind of wanting it, as Kira did with Thai food.
A couple having a romantic dinner.via Canva/Photos
Kosarin shared another scenario where the two debated how much they wanted to go out on a Saturday night. “He’ll go, ‘Well, honestly, I'm like 60 in, 40 out.’ Then I can go, ‘Hmm. I'm like 20 in, 80 out.’ He'll go, ‘Okay, you really wanna go out. I don't really mind. My percentages are pretty close. Let's go out and do what you want.’”
Ultimately, the lesson of the 50/50 method is that communication is key when it comes to having a healthy marriage. That means getting into details about how much something does or doesn’t mean to you. It’s also a lesson in compromise; if someone feels 90/10 about something, give them their way, and they’ll probably oblige when you feel as passionate on another day. Finally, the 50/50 method turns agonizing discussions into a game, and the couple that plays together, stays together.
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