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wisdom

A woman having a revelation.

Truly, though few and far between in most of our lives, there’s nothing quite like having a breakthrough moment. When you hear something that completely reframes how you view a relationship or challenging life situation that helps you move past the barrier and into a new headspace, it can be exhilarating. It’s like scratching an itch that you didn’t know you had.

"Breakthrough is that moment when frustration, struggling, fear, worry, or anxiety disappears,” famed personal development coach Tony Robbins once said. “It's a moment of insight, recognition about who you are, and the realization that you are more than the moment. It's a radical, massive improvement in the quality of your life, and as a result, all those you have the privilege to touch."

A Redditor on the Confession subforum asked people to share the “one sentence that completely changed their life,” and they received over 1,000 responses from people who heard the right wisdom at the right time and never forgot it. These sentences are powerful truths that helped people stuck in a rut realize they had the power to change or move on.

advice, breakthroughs, confessions, wisdom, moments, thinking, advice A mom consoling her daughter. via Canva/Photos

Here are 15 sentences that completely changed people’s lives

1. Sometimes when you’re in a dark place, you think you’ve been buried, but you’ve actually been planted.

"That's a spin on an old saying, 'They tried to bury us, but they didn't realise we were seeds.'"

2. Never try to hate anyone; often they don't care, and you're left doing all the work.

"Said by a friend of mine at a very critical time in my life. It's been said in other ways, but that one stuck with me for the last 35+ years."

"Makes me think of this gem: Never get in a fight with a pig. You both get covered in sh*t but the pig enjoys it."

"Hate corrodes the vessel it's carried in."

3. Have you had a bad day, or did you have a bad 5 minutes that you let ruin your day?

"I love this one explained with money. If I gave you $100, then I stole 5, would you burn/throw away the rest?"

"I need someone to remind me of this sometimes! I'm not neurotypical and I can tell sometimes that when things can't go to my plan or agreed schedule it can be like a monkey wrench in a gear and just PAUSE my life in a way I hate sometimes."

bad day, bad moment, advice, wisdom, breakthrough A bad moment, not a bad day. Giphy

4. People are quick to accept that the smallest change in the past can dramatically change the present, yet refuse to accept that the smallest action today can completely change the world.

"Hindsight’s 20/20 as they say, and it’s easier to know the difference between the outcome compared to the present. Whereas our current actions, we really have no way of knowing how it’ll affect the future, as there are so many other variables that could affect things, and we can’t see into the future."

5. Don't set yourself on fire to keep others warm

"This reminds of an African proverb I heard: Beware the naked man who offers you clothes."

6. I love you enough to let you hate me.

"My mom told me once during a heated argument in my teens, 'I love you enough to let you hate me.' Powerful."

7. Never break two laws at once; that's how you draw attention to yourself.

“If you have a body in the trunk, make sure you use your turn signals.”

"My dad was in law enforcement and told me that was how they often caught people. An example he used was at night when someone forgot to turn off their high beams there was a reasonable chance they might be an impaired driver."

8. Nothing is going to be different unless you do things differently.

"Nothing changes if nothing changes!"

"I've tried nothing and it didn't work!"

trying, nothing, advice, wisdom, breakthrough The Simpsons media4.giphy.com

9. Living well is the best revenge!

"Instead of making yourself miserable stewing over the past, improve your life and make yourself happy."

"For the people that hate you, or just generally dislike you, there's nothing worse than seeing you be happy. If someone hurts you on purpose, you don't need to try and hurt them back, if you become obsessed with them, then they've won, but being happy and leading a good life is the best revenge you could have, because they'll hate to see it. If you can't love yourself for you, love yourself just out of spite towards the people who would bring you down."

10. Don't let perfect be the enemy of good enough.

"This is a good one in the professional world. I give this advice to my direct reports often. Move onto the next great thing."

11. Acceptance is the answer

"Big Book AA: Acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing or situation—some fact of my life—unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment."

"It changed my life… I was so consumed with everything that was wrong around me. It made me start looking at and adjusting myself instead. I can only control me."

12. You never know what someone is going through, always be kind.

"Always react with kindness. It costs you nothing and can make most situations much better."

act of kindness, be kind, wisdom, advice, breakthrough Kind Give GIF by MOODMAN Giphy

13. Righty tighty, lefty loosey.

"Lives rent free in my head and has helped me every damn day of my life! Hahaha!"

"Especially when putting together furniture, saved me hours with allen keys."

14. The price of procrastination is the life you could have lived.

"Love this one!"

15. Let today be the day you learn the grace of letting go, and the power of moving on.

"I needed this thank you."

This article originally appeared in May. It has been updated.

Photo Credit: Canva

A time machine sits in between two people who have visited their younger selves.

The 80s and 90s were a truly magical time, but it wasn't all flowers and unicorns. Kids from that era faced their share of struggles, and came out the other end better for it. We often hear that with experience comes wisdom, but once we garner that wisdom, oftentimes it's too late to actually implement it into our lives. If only we had a time machine, so many of us think. If only

For example, as a proud Gen X-er, I'd take that time machine and pop right on back to 1995, wherein I was convinced to wax my eyebrows so thin they looked like pencil marks. I did it so many times, they never grew back.

thin eyebrows, waxing, time machine, gen x, beauty trend A girl with thin eyebrows. Giphy

But on a deeper level, (though the eyebrow situation was quite deep,) I'd love the chance to go back and tell the late teen to late 20s version of me: go easier on everything. Heartbreak, body image, rejection, success status. I took every break-up, every failed audition, every time I stepped on a scale so hard that it was like an anvil of self-shame dropping on my head daily. What I wouldn't give to be able to wrap my arms around myself and say, "Good job." Or, regarding heartbreak, "If this were a screenplay, this guy wouldn't even make it into the rewrites."

If we live a relatively full life, on average, we've got just over two billion seconds. Sounds like a lot, but when you put it in perspective, it's a blip. The Earth itself is estimated to be over four billion years old, and we are just a tiny flash in its ever-changing pan. I'd love to go back and tell myself to make those flashes count—each and every one of them.

What if, in examining the ideas of what we and others would tell the younger versions of ourselves, we could use it to somewhat heal our mistakes, even if only metaphorically? On the subreddit r/whatif, a person asks, "What if, Gen X-ers you could go back and talk to your younger self from the ’80s or ’90s?" They add, "What would you say about how life turned out? Are you where you thought you’d be, or did life take a different path than you imagined?"

Some people get into the logistics of it—how if you alter one thing, the rest will unravel. "I would not change a thing because I like the person I am today. Once you start unwinding the tapestry of your life and try to change things, it will change the person you are today."

butterfly, butterfly effect, time machine, gen x A psychedelic butterfly flaps its wings. Giphy GIF by Trippyogi

Some of the answers are downright practical. "$100 investment in Apple back then would be about $3 mil today. So I’d certainly not spend so much of my birthday money on Nintendo."

This Redditor combined a heartfelt answer with a pragmatic one: "I'd love to talk to my family members! Everyone who isn't around anymore. It would be amazing to spend a day with each of them again. That said, maybe I do talk to myself, and maybe I make myself repeat the following sentence over and over until I never forget it: 'As soon as you hear about Bitcoin, start mining it.'"

Just a couple of weeks ago, another thread popped up and opened the question up to all generations beyond Gen X. They posed a similar query: "Knowing what you know now - if you could go back in time, what would you tell your young adult self?"

Many responses are absolutely poignant. Despite the fact that we don't have time machines—unless there's a DeLorean idling somewhere near Christopher Lloyd—we can still use this advice going forward: "You don’t have to be perfect to be loved or respected. Show up, try your best, and don’t shrink yourself for people who wouldn’t do the same for you."

Christopher Lloyd, Back to the Future, time machine, DeLorean, hindsight Christopher Lloyd means business in a scene from Back to The Future. Giphy Back to the future flux capacitor GIF, Universal Pictures

Commenters did not hold back. "I'd grab my younger self by the shoulders and say, 'Relax. Like really, chill out.' I'd tell them, Hey, it's okay not to have it all figured out. No one does. Not even the people who look like they do."

This person was very direct and many, including myself, could relate: "I’d tell myself to not ignore the red flags that were everywhere I looked. Focus on money and not that s----y relationship you thought you wanted."

And this comment truly allowed for vulnerability: "Great question. I think I would tell my younger adult self to seek professional help sooner and not be so afraid to open up to trusted people. There was no reason to carry my struggles alone. That self-imposed isolation was my biggest mistake. It was painful, alienating, and it held me back for more than a decade."

Community

My rideshare driver asks passengers to share 'Lyfting Advice' and it restores faith in humanity

"You haven't had a perfect day until you do something for someone who will never be able to repay you."

Photo Credit: Canva

A woman gets into a rideshare. A journal full of wisdom.

"Your driver is arriving in 2 minutes. Look for Armand in a Kia Sorento." This message popped up on my iPhone as I was furiously looking for my keys to go enjoy a night of tacos and margaritas. Frazzled, I got into my Lyft, and the weird sense of dread I'd had all day immediately dissipated.

We said our hellos as I glanced down to see a yellow spiral notebook and pen in the back seat. On the front, someone had written, "Lyfting Advice." I asked what it was and for the next ten minutes, en route to my destination, I was reminded that even in these challenging (for some, even harrowing) times, the goodness of humanity has the ability to prevail.

Armand explained that he has been asking passengers to write down any words of wisdom (or frankly whatever is on their minds) in the notebook. (He named it "Lyfting Advice," because the idea is, quite perfectly, that people give "uplifting advice in a Lyft.") At the end of every day, he reads these passages/quotes/snippets as he reflects on his life and his place in this world. "Go ahead, take a look," he encouraged. I flipped to the first page and was instantly moved by what I saw. Different handwriting across different days—people in the back of this rideshare had beautiful messages to share.

lyft, uber, rideshare, wisdom, community Lyft passengers share words if wisdom in a journal.Photo Credit: Cecily Knobler

The first to catch my eye was this seemingly familiar idea: "Never regret a day in your life. Good days give happiness. Bad days give experiences. Worst days give lessons and best days give memories."

One simply writes, "You are enough. You are loved." And this passenger quoted UCLA basketball coach John Wooden: "You haven't had a perfect day until you do something for someone who will never be able to repay you." Another shares, "The best things in life are simple."

John Wooden, UCLA, lyft, Uber, rideshare, wisdom Wisdom from Lyft passengers in a journal.Photo Credit: Cecily Knobler

I read the latter out loud and we began discussing the little special moments in life that make it easier. Friendships, sunshine, and yes—tacos.

Some people talked about the importance of listening to health cues, both physical and mental. "Do not put your job over your health." Another writes, "Be strong enough to hold yourself accountable. Own up to mistakes, challenges, anything that makes life seem tough. It'll help you grow." And another, "Take care of yourself in health. Otherwise, you'll need to take care of yourself in sickness."

Many focused on overcoming the not-so-good days. "One day at a time. This too shall pass. Time heals all." "Stop worrying about what other people think about you and then you'll experience true freedom and happiness." "No one will save you but yourself. Life passes away quickly, don't wait to live your best life!"

Lyft, rideshare, Uber, wisdom. community Words of wisdom in a journal in a LyftPhoto Credit: Cecily Knobler

Armand shared his personal favorite: "Be led by your dreams versus being pushed by your problems." When he asked me to share mine, I gave him some verbal encouragement and wrote, "Check the Upworthy website in about a week."

Kids

Resurfaced clip of 3-year-old girl explaining 'self love' in less than a minute is pure joy

"Sometimes you need to talk to a three-year-old to understand a thing about life."

Photo Credit: Canva

A young girl and a woman hug themselves in an act of self-love.

There are times that age has nothing to do with wisdom. In fact, sometimes the pureness of youth can help us grasp ideas many of us spend a lifetime wrestling to understand. A video of a three-year-old girl being interviewed by her father has resurfaced recently on social media. In 50 seconds flat, she sums up the importance of self-love so beautifully and simply and is bringing true joy to many who watch.

Conor T. Murphy has occasional chats with his daughter Ty, who just turned six last week. On one occasion, he asked her point blank, "When do you feel loved?" She thinks for a split second and answers, "When someone hugs me and when I'm not lonely." He repeats these words back to her and she adds, "And when I hug myself."

@conortmurphy

Self love advice from Dr. Ty


He asks, "Do you think it's important to hug yourself? Why?" She answers without blinking, "Just because I'm a doctor." He affirms that she is, indeed, a doctor, and questions, "So because you're a doctor, you know that hugging yourself is helpful?" She adds, "It makes me feel relaxed."

He follows up, "Can you show me how you hug yourself?" Ty proceeds to give herself a huge bear hug, while smiling. "That's what we call self-love," Conor tells her. "And it's important, right?" She agrees emphatically. "Yeah, we have to love ourselves." He wraps it up by saying, "I think that's two very important lessons. We have to love ourselves—and everyone poops."

(The last line was not apropos of nothing. He is referring to a segment earlier in their conversation, wherein he brought up the topic of going to the bathroom. She adorably exclaims she is not afraid to poop!)

@conortmurphy

Everybody poops. “We really need to talk abut this” 😂😂


The comments were so truly wholesome. On TikTok, a person referenced Ty's "medical career," and asked, "Can she give me prescriptions for hugs, please?"

Another noted that Conor seems like a truly wonderful father, writing, "Dude, she's amazing. Good job Dad, you're doing a darn good job."

Just a few days ago, Conor posted a photo of himself with Ty on Instagram, celebrating her birthday. He writes, "One of my favorite things to do is answer people when they ask how my daughter is. If you have met her before, you understand why this brings me so much joy to answer this truthfully and wholeheartedly. Happy Birthday, Ty. 6 years old today. Seems like she was a 1 year old yesterday."

Again, the comments show love for both Ty and Conor. One writes, "Happy Birthday Sweet Ty! You are genuinely one of my favorite people whom I’ve never met."

Experts have discussed the importance of self-love over the centuries. Psychologist Sharon Martin, DSW, LCSW explains in a piece for Psychology Today, "Self-love entails accepting yourself wholeheartedly, treating yourself with kindness and respect, and prioritizing your physical and emotional health. It goes beyond mere actions and extends to your thoughts and feelings about yourself."

She illustrates helpful ways that one can practice self-love. Among many, one that stood out is the idea of "celebrating your achievements." We forget sometimes how far we've come. Martin reminds us, "Acknowledging and celebrating your accomplishments, no matter how big or small. For example, treat yourself to something you enjoy, reflect on your growth, or share your successes with trusted friends or loved ones."

Sabrina Romanoff, PsyD, a clinical psychologist and professor at Yeshiva University, is quoted in an article for Verywell Mind noting that the love that we give ourselves will help the love that we have for others feel secure and healthy: "It’s important to have self-worth because it impacts everything you do from your relationships, to how you work, how you feel about yourself, and how others view you."

Conor T Murphy and his daughter Ty discuss important matters. www.youtube.com, Bignight Media

If at such a young age Ty has this much figured out, imagine what wisdom she'll impart as she continues to grow!