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wedding

"I now pronounce you, in debt. You may kiss the bride."

In 1964, Paul McCartney of the Beatles famously sang, “I don’t care too much for money, money can’t buy me love.” While Mr. McCartney’s sentiments were definitely a major foreshadowing of the hippie, free-love movement that was to come in the ‘60s, it appears as though he was also onto a big truth that wouldn’t be proven for another 50 years.

10 years ago, researchers Hugo M. Mialon and Andrew Francis-Tan from Emory University embarked on the first study to determine whether spending a lot on a wedding or engagement ring meant a marriage would succeed or fail.

The pair wanted to see if the wedding industry was being honest when it came to claims that the more money a couple spends, the more likely they are to stay together.

“The wedding industry has consistently sought to link wedding spending with long-lasting marriages. This paper is the first to examine this relationship statistically,” the researchers wrote.

The researchers carried out online surveys with more than 3,000 ever-married people living in the United States.

After reviewing the answers to the questionnaire the researchers learned that spending big bucks on a wedding and engagement ring made a couple more likely to get divorced. The researchers determined that "marriage duration is inversely associated with spending on the engagement ring and wedding ceremony."

Conversely, they found that "relatively low spending on the wedding is positively associated with duration among male and female respondents."

The researchers also found that the number of people who attend the wedding matters, too. The questionnaire revealed that “high wedding attendance and having a honeymoon (regardless of how much it cost) are generally positively associated with marriage duration."

The researchers haven’t studied why people who splurge on weddings and rings have a greater chance of having to hire divorce lawyers, but they have a few theories.

“It could be that the type of couples who have a … (cheap wedding) are the type that are a perfect match for each other,” Mialon told CNN. “Or it could be that having an inexpensive wedding relieves young couples of financial burdens that may strain their marriage,” he added.

Francis-Tan believes that people who have weddings with a large number of attendees are more successful because they have a lot of support.

“This could be evidence of a community effect, i.e., having more support from friends and family may help the couple to get through the challenges of marriage,” Francis-Tan said. “Or this could be that the type of couples who have a lot of friends and family are also the type that tend not to divorce as much.”

Could it also be that people who put a big emphasis on a flashy wedding and jewelry tend to bit a bit more materialistic? It makes sense that couples that are really into keeping up appearances may not have their properties straight when it comes to building a loving relationship.

To finish things off with another pop music analogy, “If you liked it then you should have put a ring on it,” (just make sure it’s an inexpensive one, in front of a lot of people, in your backyard).

This article originally appeared four years ago.

Photos courtesy of Chelsea Schaefer Photography

Michelle and Scott Ellermets got a beautiful symbol of hope on their wedding day.

Finding love again after losing a long-time partner isn't always easy. Being widowed comes with complicated emotions—sadness, worry, guilt, grief—and it can be hard to imagine ever falling in love again when you're in the middle of processing all of those feelings.

But sometimes loves comes along when we least expect it, which is how Michelle and Scott Ellermets ended up in a wildly viral moment.

Wedding photographer Chelsea Schaefer shared a compilation of photos and video from the Ellermets' beach wedding that took place on September 7, 2024 and it's been viewed by millions.


A beautiful story of love after loss

"After both unexpectedly losing their spouses of 20+ years, they met in their local grief group," the video begins. "They fell in love."

Schaefer explained that it rained the whole day of the wedding, but just minutes before the ceremony began, the sun came out and a double rainbow appeared.

Watch:

@chelseaschaefer24

I will never get over this day 🥹🌈


The couple's story is as sweet as two people who've lost their life partners can be.

Michelle had been married to her husband Jonathan for more than 23 years when he died unexpectedly of a heart attack in January of 2023. Scott was married to his wife Lisa for 29 years, but she passed away following an illness in June of the same year.

Michelle and Scott both joined a support group for grieving spouses in the Washington D.C. area.

"I joined Facebook in early December and a [local] widows [and] widowers website," Scott told Good Morning America. "And when I got on it, I saw that somebody was Facebook friends with my sister. It happened to be Michelle." He decided to send her a message and they hit it off right away.

They were just supportive friends at first. In fact, Michelle even told him that she wouldn't ever marry again. But love had other plans.

family at wedding on a beachThe Ellermets and their loved ones at their weddingPhotos courtesy of Chelsea Schaefer Photography

Friendship grew into another chance at love

"Our friendship, just at some point along the way, became more than that -- and we fell in love," Michelle told GMA. One thing that mutual loss had taught them was that time isn't promised, so they didn't hesitate when they knew they wanted to get married.

"At our age, when you know, why not?" said Michelle. We don't want to waste any time. You can't take your days for granted."

The double rainbow that greeted them at the end of their ceremony felt like "icing on the cake' and "a blessing from God" said Scott. Many of the millions who have watched the video agree, saying they see the double rainbow as a sign from their lost loved ones.

"Their late spouses gave them their blessings...love it"

"They approve & probably played a part in bringing you together from the other side. 🙏🏻🙏🏻"

"You can't tell me the two rainbows aren't their late partners supporting them ❤️"

"The double rainbow gave me immediate goosebumps 🌈🌈❤️❤️"

"If that’s not a sign I don’t know what is! God bless their marriage."

"Both late spouses sending their blessings!!! How beautiful!! I wish you both all the happiness!! ❤️🌈🌈"

"There is no clearer sign than a double rainbow when widowers find solace and love in each other. Both of their dearly departed loved ones wanted them to find happiness, and they’re just so happy that they have each other to lean on ♥️✨"

"When I remarried a widower, as a widow myself, there was a beautiful soft snow that fell for about one minute at the reception. It was so beautiful. And we believe it was a sign from our beloved spouses."

bride and groom on beach in front of rainbowThe double rainbow felt like a blessing, the couple said.Photos courtesy of Chelsea Schaefer Photography

The story is giving other widowed people hope

Others who have lost partners said they found hope in the story.

"🌈 Goosebumps here. I'm a widow and I find the rainbows so romantic. Their late partners showed out in the cutest way."

"I need this in my life. I lost my fiancé unexpectedly in 2022 and I want to fall in love again. I hope to find him one day again."

"This is so beautiful! I’m finding there are no such things as coincidences — this was absolutely the late spouses giving their blessing. I lost my husband to brain cancer 7 months ago and cannot imagine dating, especially while still raising our two young kids. But this still gives me hope. 🌈"

"This made me cry. I lost my husband and this give me hope. Thank you for sharing!! Wishing them all the happiness!!"

Rainbows are a symbol of hope because, as the saying goes, you can't have a rainbow without the rain first. No one wants their beachside wedding ruined by rain, and this couple may have been disappointed by the weather early in the day, but there was something beautiful in store for them.

We've all heard nightmarish stories about wedding guests showing up in white, and even mothers-in-law trying to upstage the bride.

Well, romance author Amy Pennza recently shared a wedding horror story that combines the two.

Yes, Pennza's mother-in-law showed up to her wedding in a white dress looking straight from David's Bridal. It has to be seen to be believed, and luckily, Pennza posted receipts:



All of Twitter ground to a halt as people awaited the deets.



It amassed thousands of retweets as Pennza's adoring public speculated about how this tale could have ended.




After a bit more begging, Pennza finally returned to Twitter to bless us all with the full story — and it's kind of surprising. Here it is, slightly condensed:

So, a couple people have asked for the story behind The Dress. Sorry for the delay! I have four kids (yes, I married him) on summer break, so my permanent state of being is "frazzled." I called my daughter "mom" the other day.
I didn't know what my mother-in-law planned to wear. I didn't think to ask.

The morning of the wedding, all the women in the bridal party cram into a tiny room in the church. You know, body glitter and hairspray everywhere. Fifteen coats of mascara. Putting napkins under your pits so you don't sweat on your dress.

She walks in. I see it.don't remember much about the day. Most people say their wedding is a blur, and that's true for me, too.

But I know I said this: "You... You could be the bride..."

Later, my sister (matron of honor) said she didn't pull me aside and talk about it because she hoped I was too distracted to notice. My college roommate (bridesmaid) said the same thing.

But secretly, they both spent the reception looking at me, then each other, then MIL, then me, then the cop the venue made us hire—hoping I didn't go for his taser.

I'm happy to report the wedding unfolded without bloodshed, or anyone being shoved into the champagne fountain.

Then the story goes on and you realize Pennza might be the most understanding person alive:

Here's the thing: My mother-in-law is extremely frugal. And I don't mean she just enjoys a good bargain. To understand her, you have to know where she comes from.

She grew up in extreme poverty. As a child, she used to sneak into the kitchen and eat match heads. That's a pica craving, and kids do it when they're malnourished.

When you grow up with nothing, it stays with you. Forever, I think. No matter how much money you earn, there's always that little fear in the back of your mind that someone might take it all away.

But her upbringing didn't make her hard. Or cruel. Or selfish.

However, she's a bargain hunter to the bone. Her money saving strategies are legend—and often hilarious. At family gatherings, we amuse ourselves telling stories of crazy shit she's done to save money.
[...]
So when she spotted The Dress at an incredible bargain, she couldn't turn it down. If you ask her now, she says she feels terrible about it.

Although, she also told me, "I think I've still got it. We should raffle it off."

She's frugal. But she's also incredibly generous. When my twins were newborns, she drove across town every night, slept on the sofa, and did three feedings. For two babies.

Every night for months.She regularly shows up at my house with bags of new clothes for the kids. (Because she's a kick ass bargain hunter.)

When I got my first job, she hemmed all my work pants because I can't sew for shit. And because she was proud of me.

She never misses a band concert, sports event, talent show, science fair...you name it. She'd walk over hot coals for her grandchildren. She gives them everything. Because, you know, she grew up with nothing.

So, yeah, the wedding dress was a shock. But it gave me a pretty funny memory. No one who attended has ever forgotten it. And, you have to admit, weddings can be forgettable.

Sure, she wore a wedding dress to my wedding. But she has more than made up for it since. When I told her about this getting a lot of attention, and said I worried it might hurt her feelings, she waved it off. "Whatever makes me famous."


So Pennza's MIL bought the dress because it was a bargain, and Pennza accepted that. Very nice of her, as many of us might have wondered whether there were any, I don't know, non-bridal dresses on sale somewhere in the world. But sure, okay.

Lots of feelings were felt.

Pretty much everyone agreed Pennza is a champ for seeing things this way.

But also just FYI: if this happens to you, it's okay to be furious.


This article originally appeared on SomeeCards. You can read it here.

@erica_crystal/TikTok

The video has already racked but over 36 million views on TikTok.

With as much controversy as there is surrounding tip culture these days, this wholesome story reminds us that at the end of the day—many, if not most humans will gladly show generosity when it is genuinely asked of them.

Paul Slobodzian and his fiancé Aly wanted to create an unforgettable wedding to celebrate their love in the most special way possible. To make it happen, both took on a side hustle driving for Uber Eats every day for over a year.

During one delivery, Slobodzian thought he’d try slipping a heartfelt, handwritten note sharing his wish into the bag of the order.

That note, which went into Erica Hernandez’s Chipotle order, read:


“Thank you for your order! I’m delivering for <3 on the side to give my fiancée the wedding she deserves. Any additional tip through the app or Venmo is greatly appreciated.”

Touched by Slobodzian’s honest plea, Hernandez shared the video onto TikTok, saying “I don’t have a lot of followers, but hopefully this reaches the right people.”

uber eats, uber eat driver note, wedding, wedding savings planTikTok · erica_cristalwww.tiktok.com

The video not only reached the right people, but loads of them. The clip went mega viral, racking up nearly 37 million views. Pretty soon the donations began pouring in, including $500 from Chipotle itself.

Slobodzian later posted an emotional follow-up video saying that, because of the donations, he and Aly reached their wedding saving’s goal, and now would be able to reclaim some quality time today before the big day on September 21st.

“I don’t even know how to express my gratitude for this to anybody who has reached out and sent well wishes or money or anything our way that is positive. It has truly changed our lives.”


@paulslobo711 CHIPOTLE DELIVERY DRIVER FIANCÉ UPDATE: A huge thank you to everyone who has reached out regarding my note on @erica_cristal’s video. The support for me and my fiancée, @Aly, means more than I can express. Thank you all for changing our lives. #update #chipotle #wedding #deliverydriver ♬ original sound - Paul


What’s more—Erica will be a special guest. Plus, she got an extra $1000 from the happy couple as a thank-you. And she got a $250 Chipotle gift card! Talk about the gift that keeps on giving.

Slobodzian would end up recounting this entire tale to Fox News, reaching and inspiring millions more viewers worldwide, many of whom were compelled to send some love in the comments.

“Hi from New Zealand!”

“You’ve reached Australia! Your story is amazing. Congratulations.”

“You’ve reached South Africa and this is truly a wholesome story.”

“Love from Nigeria.”

“Seeing from BC, Canada.”

“Congratulations from Ghana. You are going to make a nice couple.”

“Congratulations from Germany.”

“I’m in Scotland and read about this in an article. Congratulations to you both. I hope you have the wedding of your dreams and some left over for the honeymoon.”

“You’ve reached Toronto. The power of social media is so beautiful.”

Many couldn’t help but note this was social media at its very best. As one person put it, “sometimes the internet is awesome.” Indeed, it is.

This is the ultimate example that the kindness of strangers can really do some powerful things. And what a profound reminder that by just trying to help one person, it can have an exponential impact.