travel

When circumstances drive you to leave the land of your birth to try and make it in a new country, there are important and daunting challenges. These include finding housing, arranging for medical needs, and procuring a good piece of celery that doesn't wilt over sadly when you hold it up. Martinis will also factor heavily in your mind.

Joanna McIsaac-Kierklo, 74, and her husband Ed Kierklo, 75, had a retirement dream: leave San Francisco with their Birmin cat Suzette and start fresh in the charming streets of France. They wanted the “bon vivant” life. A year later, they’re waving the white flag and booking a ticket back to California with a list of complaints that reads more like a parody of expat privilege than actual hardship.

“I miss frozen yogurt… I miss my friends… I miss my apartment.”

— Joanna McIsaac-Kierklo

The French dream that came after the English dream

For Joanna and Ed, who retired from lucrative careers and traveled the world extensively, picking up and moving wasn’t new. In the waning days of the pandemic, they leveraged the equity in their California home, got themselves vaccinated, and gave life in London a chance. They didn't go alone, though. Their Birmin cat, Suzette, came too, to the tune of over $4,000. That adventure lasted 11 months before they came home. No word on what Suzette's return ticket cost.

It wasn’t long before they dreamt of Europe again, this time to stay. They imagined a life full of baguettes, wine, and village charm. So, back into the carrier went Suzette, this time for an extra $5,000. But after arriving in Nîmes, a quaint city in Southern France, Joanna and Ed quickly found expat life wasn’t the vacation they’d pictured. “Every single day it was something more devastating than the day before,” Joanna told CNN.

The lovely city of Nîmes, in Southern France, where we're told the celery leaves something to be desired. Ymblanter

French cuisine is celebrated, but Joanna quickly grew disenchanted. “People go, ‘Oh my god, the French food is so fabulous,’” she said. “Yeah, if you want to eat brie, pâté, pastries, and French bread all day long… but who eats like that?” Seeking fresher options, she turned to the market. “You pick up a piece of celery, and it falls over,” she complained, decrying the “limp” state of French greens.

“We gave it a year here. And we just said, ‘Too much grief and no joy.’ There’s no fun. We’re struggling every day.”

— Joanna McIsaac-Kierklo

The couple’s frustration reached a boiling point. Between government paperwork, language barriers, and their limited French, Joanna and Ed felt a world away from the lifestyle they’d imagined. “I honestly don’t think we could have put in any more effort to acclimatize to the French way of life,” she said.

Friends? Oui. Friendships? Not so much.

Adjusting to a new social scene in France was another challenge. Used to the easy-going connections of San Francisco, Joanna found French locals polite but reserved. “I haven’t talked to one person here in three months,” she admitted. “They’re nice people,” she said, “but they’re also very private. It’s a hard shell to break.”

They’d left home to find community and new perspectives, only to feel more isolated as time wore on.

The retirement dream doesn’t always go as planned

Joanna and Ed aren’t alone in their struggles. For Kate and Dan Morse, a dream retirement in Portugal turned unexpectedly complicated, despite careful planning. They made it three years before returning to the U.S., realizing that expat life came with unique challenges, even in a beautiful location.

“It's not as easy to be an expat in Portugal as people seem to think,” said Kate Morse, 71. While the couple loved Portugal’s natural beauty, affordability, and rich history, they found it difficult to navigate banking, healthcare, and local customs without fluency in Portuguese.

"When you can’t defend yourself and make yourself understood, you’re vulnerable."

— Kate Morse

Although they’d learned some Portuguese, communicating in a crisis—or even managing their finances—was frustrating without native-level skills.

The Morses’ experience highlights that, for many would-be expats, adjusting to a new culture can mean confronting unexpected limitations and reconsidering priorities. Like Joanna and Ed, they realized that sometimes, the comforts of home and a supportive community make all the difference.

Au revoir, French fantasy—hello, Plan B

Unlike many immigrants, Joanna and Ed had a fallback. Learning from their London experience, they held onto a rent-controlled apartment in San Francisco. Now, after a year overseas, it’s time to head home. “You’ve got to have a Plan B,” Joanna said.

Looking back, Joanna has no regrets about trying life in France. But she reminds would-be expats that the basics—good produce, friends, and familiar comforts—can be easier to come by back home.

“Moving to France for a slower life sounds wonderful,” she said, “but we learned the not-so-pleasant side very quickly.”

No word yet on what Suzette's trip home will cost.