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Texas dad and son have first encounter with a trans woman, and dad sets a powerful example

It's a simple message that speaks volumes.

@oddragon226/TikTok

Sometimes allyship is simple

Now more than ever, the transgender community needs support. Particularly in conservative states in Texas, where bills that would dictate bathroom use, restrict funding for surgeries, and most recently, charge transgender people with “gender identity fraud," have been filed. Even if all of these proposed bills failed, damage has been done as it only fuels bigotry and extremism, endangering the marginalized individuals living in these areas.

Still, even if your heart is in the right place, it can be hard to know the best or most feasible way to even show up as an ally. And that's the beauty of this story. Sometimes it really is a simple matter to accept people as they are and treat all humans with dignity, kindness and respect, even if we don't fully understand them.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

A dad shared his first encounter with a transgender woman in his small Texas town, and the simple lesson he taught his son inspired hope in others. James Eric Barlow (oddragon226 on TikTok) shared a video from his car describing how he and his son saw a trans woman in real life for the first time.

"We all know that there's people that are disgusted whenever they see a trans person," Barlow began. "And we all know of the people who don't care if they see a trans person. "But apparently, we're a third type of person (or at least I am, I can't speak for him)," he says, indicating his son in the backseat who chimes in with "I am, too!"

Barlow went on to explain how they had just had their first experience with a trans woman. It wasn't anything major—she just walked through a door behind them and Barlow held the door for her, just as he would any other person. He didn't even notice she was trans at first, but once he did, his immediate reaction was one we can all learn from.

"When I tell you how happy it made me," he said, beginning to tear up, "to be able to see somebody be out and open to the world here in small town Texas. You just gotta know how much bravery that takes. Right, Mikey?"

"Hell yeah!" the son agreed.

Barlow wanted to say something to her, but he didn't want to make her feel uncomfortable, either.

"But if you're a trans woman and you came here to the Landmark truck stop in Clyde, Texas, just know we're proud of you," he concluded.

@oddragon226 our first trans woman experience #trans #transwoman #transpeoplearepeople #transrights #translivesnatter ♬ original sound - oddragon neckbeard

Barlow's video was shared on Reddit, where it's received a slew of views and comments that prove parents set the tone for their kids' sense of acceptance.

"Indoctrinate your children with kindness, compassion, consideration and respect for others." - Toddthmpsn

"When I was younger I would get my hair cut by a woman named Liz. She spoke Spanish so it was hard for to understand her English sometimes. My dad spoke Spanish so would translate for her and me. I noticed Liz looked a little different then other women. But I never said anything, I never felt any differently about her. She never scared me, or made me question anything. She was just Liz. As I got older I realized she was a trans woman. And it literally changed nothing. She was still just Liz. Liz was always kind and treated everyone warmly. I havnt seen her in years but I hope she is doing well. I really liked her." - PerplexedPoppy

"This literally happened to me as a child in the 80s. A cashier at a store we visited suddenly started dressing in a feminine style and it appeared that they were transitioning. My mom explained to me in an age appropriate way that sometimes people decide they want to be a man instead of a woman, or a woman instead of a man. She told me that people would probably be mean to the cashier and it was important for us to remember that and always be polite to her, as we would anyway. This was way before trans issues were as mainstream as they are now, but my mom had seen an episode of Phil Donahue where trans woman discussed their stories, and she recognized it as a medical issue. Core memory for me." - ZipCity262

"As a trans woman, im deathly afraid whenever I have to go to rural areas. I can instantly feel physical tension when I walk into a gas station or a restaurant in these areas. Thank you for being supportive. Trans people need you now more than ever." – rainbow_lenses

As this dad and son showed, it's a simple matter to demonstrate non-judgmental acceptance in front of our kids so they hopefully will grow up without being bound by chains of bigotry they'll later have to learn to unload.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

This article originally appeared two years ago.

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Identity

Mom shares why she let her 17-year-old get top surgery. His face says it all.

"Cody’s heart is so full…"

@jannatransmomma/TikTok

Living in truth is beautiful.

Top surgery, otherwise known as chest feminization or chest masculinization, is a gender-affirming procedure that changes the looks of a trans person’s chest. For female-to-male top surgery, breast tissue is removed to give a more masculine appearance for transgender males and non-binary people who are assigned female at birth.

This procedure, along with all forms of gender-affirming care, is surrounded by stigma and misinformation, especially when it comes to minors. Many parents fear that a teen could make a severe, irreversible decision regarding their gender presentation, given that adolescence is a time when the whole subject of identity is in flux.

It’s partially fears like this that have resulted in gender-affirming care receiving a wave of backlash in America, even being labeled as a form of child abuse.

However, a mom by the name of Janna, who recently helped her 17-year-old son receive top surgery, sees it as a form of love.

“Why would I ever allow my 17-year-old to have top surgery? Why would I do that? That’s insane. That’s crazy. It’s child abuse,” says Janna in a clip posted to TikTok.

Her reasoning is really quite simple—and something that almost every parent can relate to in one way or another.

“You look at the really, really happy kid who walked out of the doctor’s office today, feeling really great about himself for the first time in I don’t even know how long.”

Janna then put the spotlight on her son Cody and asked what it felt like when he saw his chest for the first time.

Getting instantly teary, Cody replied, “Normal…It finally feels right for the first time.”

Janna's video is captioned “Cody’s heart is so full right now.”

Watch:

@jannatransmomma Cody’s heart is so full ❤️ #lgbt🌈 #topsurgery ♬ Uplifting - Positive Thinking: Music To Develop A Complete Meditation Mindset For Yoga, Deep Sleep


Janna, who regularly advocates for trans rights, has previously explained in another TikTok that Cody didn’t undergo any surgery until just before his 18th birthday, and that was only after “a lot of meetings” with doctors, therapists and both of his parents since coming out at the age of 15.

And prior to his procedure, Janna encouraged Cody to explore through a “social transition,” rather than a medical one. This basically means experimenting with other forms of gender presentation—changing their name, pronouns, wardrobe, etc.—that feel more fitting to their authentic identity before undergoing any surgeries.

Bottom line: “We are not just sending these kids to surgeons to have body parts removed. That doesn’t happen,” Janna stated.

@jannatransmomma #stitch with @thatwhannteacher2.0 ♬ original sound - 🏳️‍🌈JannaTransMomma🏳️‍🌈

When parents support their kids throughout their journey, “one of two things is going to happen,” she added. “They’re going to come out as trans when they’re old enough to really make that decision, or they’re going to say, ‘Yeah, I’m not really a boy.'"

“Either way,” she continued, “their relationship with you will not be tarnished because they know that my mom loved me no matter what my decisions were.”

Like every other turbulent and confusing chapter of teenage-hood, the waters are so much easier to navigate (for both the parent and the child) when there is compassion. Sometimes allowing kids to be who they really are is the best gift a parent can provide.

parenting
LQBTQIA+

Hockey team entirely made up of trans and nonbinary people compete across US

They are creating a space that allows people to be themselves while participating in a sport they love.

www.youtube.com

Hockey team made up of trans and nonbinary people

Many people played sports growing up and some continue to play as adults on recreational teams in their cities. Usually teams are split between girls and boys, even as adults but there's one team out there creating a safe space for transgender players. Team Trans is a hockey team made up of hundreds of people and they play competitively in LGBTQ tournaments across the country.

According to one of the players, Team Trans is an international collective of players that identify as trans or nonbinary. Recently there has been more and more legislation surrounding trans rights and issues, including the ability for trans youth and adults to play sports.

But with Team Trans, the members are able to create a safe environment for trans and nonbinary people to compete in a sport that they enjoy. There's no one telling them who can and can't play on their team based on someone else's opinion. They make the rules and they're having fun.

When the team sat down with Good Morning America, some of the members discussed the importance of Team Trans and how it changed their lives.

"I actually stopped playing hockey when I began my transition. The first time I stepped back on the ice was in Las Vegas with Team Trans and it reignited my love for the sport," Keira Wiele tells GMA. "It was a life changing experience for me and continues to be a life changing experience for me."

"We're doing this for joy. We're doing this to have fun. That's it. That's all it is," Sarah Antaya says. "We just want to exist and we want to do all of these fun things in our amazing world that all of us want to do."

You can watch the entire interview below:

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Pop Culture

Drew Barrymore and Dylan Mulvaney share powerful moment on what they've learned from their critics

“It’s beautiful when your childhood icons are actually decent people."

The Drew Barrymore Show/YouTube

Drew Barrymore speaks with Dylan Mulvaney

Drew Barrymore has been part of our public lives for more than 40 years. And while she has millions of fans, you're bound to pick up some critics along the way.

These days, it's easy to dismiss any sort of criticism as out of bounds, be it sexism, racism, homophobia, transphobia and so on.

Which is why it's easy to understand why one might assume that's where Barrymore was going in her interview with trans influencer and activist Dylan Mulvaney.

Instead, the pair shared a powerful exchange, even kneeling on the floor where Barrymore felt the intimacy of their moment would be "safer." They broke down what they've learned from their critics and how they've learned to move beyond other kinds of criticism that are only designed to cause harm.


Mulvaney sat down with Barrymore to discuss the inspiration behind her “365 Days of Girlhood” series, where Mulvaney posts daily social media videos documenting her transition.

Mulvaney acknowledged that she did receive some feedback from fellow trans celebrity Laverne Cox about how Mulvaney was handling her public transition. "She said to keep something private for myself," Mulvaney said. "And I couldn't agree more in the way that there were a few moments this year where I was like, 'Was I actually ready to say that?' But now, since meeting her, and having that moment, I go, 'Okay, what would Laverne do?' and I have actually stopped myself from making a few videos to make sure I was actually ready to talk about those things."

Mulvaney then went on to explain that even when keeping some things private, she also tries to consider what her growing audience of fans gains from her videos.

“I think about if I was following myself on TikTok as a young kid, what would I want to hear?” Mulvaney told Barrymore, adding that the amount of support she has received was a complete surprise.

“I figured when I came out that I might have to go into hiding and then do all my surgeries privately and change my name and instead decided, hey, let me see if the world is willing to accept me this way from day one, and they did,” she said.

When asked how she dealt with negative comments online towards herself and the trans community, Mulvaney shared, “I think the greatest weapon that I can contribute is trans joy…I’m not somebody that is trying to do anything but be myself and be happy.”

Towards the end of the segment, Barrymore got on her knees to get closer to Mulvaney while explaining her own approach to handling criticism, comparing film reviews to today’s social media (“You are pretty much guaranteed a 50-50, some like it, some don’t.”) and going so far as to say her worst critic is still often herself.

The two sat on the floor together and shared a hug just before going to a commercial break.

“Thank you for joining me on the floor. The floor always feels safer,” Barrymore said.

While some people took issue with the exchange, in particular finding offense at Barrymore "kneeling" before Mulvaney (a quickly debunked claim), the exchange was in reality a positive, unifying example of how we can learn from some criticism while understanding when it's better to simply let the outside voices go.

And it's not like it's the first time Barrymore has used her show to go deeper.

As one person was quick to point out, this is not the first time Barrymore has demonstrated this gesture and even provided pictures to prove it.

Actress Laura J Silverman, who claimed to work with Barrymore, attested that this kind of behavior was simply her MO.

“I worked with Drew Barrymore once and she really is that person—lovely, kind, generous, genuine; open hearted, interested, fun. Full of life. A lot of people would do well to emulate that.”

Others were quick to defend Barrymore’s actions, saying it spoke more to her humanity than anything else.

“Drew Barrymore is a sweet, honest, kind, human being who puts empathy, compassion, and the comfort of others first,” one person wrote.

“It’s beautiful when your childhood icons are actually decent people who care about Queer people,” another added.

You can watch the full video below.

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