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Parenting

Former bully reveals her mom's brutal 'lesson in humility' that made her change her ways

Two simple words made all the difference.

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Humility and grace go a long way.

We all agree that bullying is bad, yes? I think most adults would agree, at least in theory, that we should treat people with kindness and not with cruelty. But that doesn't change the fact that bullying happens every day in all walks of life. Schools, for example, are rife with it. And that's because a lot of children are still learning crucial skills like empathy, humility, and basic human decency.

When parents catch their own kids being bullies, they usually go down one of two different roads. They may refuse to believe that it's true. My child would never! There must be some kind of misunderstanding! This opens the door for the behavior to continue. On the other hand, other well-meaning parents may bring the hammer down. Yelling, punishments, you name it. It's preferable to ignoring the problem, that's for sure, but it may still miss the mark in terms of teaching a lasting lesson.

A TikTok user, Steph, recently shared her own story of being a former bully, and the exceptional job her mother did handling it when she found out.

gif of Marty McFly confronting bully BifFThere are tons of reasons why people bully others, but it's never a good thing. Giphy

Steph admits in the video that she had been saying cruel things on the school bus to a neighbor girl named Lisa when they were about nine years old. One day, Steph was surprised to find Lisa's mom at her house telling her own mom all about it. Steph's mom was shocked and disappointed.

She says her parents weren't big on yelling or even punishments. They preferred that their kids learn from natural consequences, so what followed was a natural fit: Steph was going to have to apologize to Lisa.

It sounds obvious, but it's a step a lot of parents skip when it comes to bullying. And it's really one of the most important and empathetic parts of the whole process. When you do something wrong or you hurt someone, the right thing to do is apologize.

But Steph's mom wasn't content with an eyes-down, mumbled, "I'm sorry." After making Steph "march" to Lisa's house and face Lisa's family, Steph said, "Lisa, I'm really sorry for the things I've been saying to you." But that wasn't good enough for mom.

"Such as?" Steph's mom said. She then made Steph repeat the horrible things she'd been saying in front of her, in front of Lisa, and in front of Lisa's mom. There was no sidestepping or glossing over her behavior. It was all out in the open for everyone to see in all of its ugliness. The shame and dread Steph felt in that moment has stayed with her forever, but she learned an important lesson in humility and how to take accountability for her actions that day.

"I never bullied anyone again after that."

Watch Steph's whole story here:


@absurdoblivion

In elementary school I bullied a neighbour on the bus ride home over a period of several weeks. Here is the story of how my gentle parent mom dealt with it. …. I still feel ashamed of my behaviour to this DAY!!!!! #bullying

People loved Steph's mom's amazing approach to a difficult situation.

Over a million viewers on TikTok watched Steph's video, with many chiming in with support or stories of their own:

"Appropriate shame is so important in human social path development. Your mom is a queen for doing this"

"My mom sat me down and said 'where did you learn to be mean because I did not raise a mean girl and that’s what you are' her words still ring in my head 17 years later"

"i had second hand shame listening to this. wow. thank you for sharing. ill be implementing this in our family"

"Making you repeat everything in front of her mom is the ultimate consequence"

"Saying out loud specifically what you did is a HUGE part of taking accountability. Great work mom."

One study from a surprising place — trains! — showed that when 'apology messages' were more specific, they were accompanied with more forgiveness. It's much easier to be vague, i.e. "I'm sorry for what I did." Being specific forces us to admit our mistakes on a deeper level and ultimately connect better with the people we've hurt.

Experts agree that an apology is in order when one kid bullies another. Teaching empathy, setting clear expectations for behavior changes you want to see, and being supportive in helping your child make those changes are also key. Consequences for bullying behavior can work, but it's best not to let your temper flare too much. Kids who bully may be being mistreated by an adult or older kid in their own life, so handling the situation with love and empathy is preferable to anger.

Steph's mother's technique is good inspiration. A genuine, specific, and heartfelt apology can go a long way in changing the lives of a bullied kid and the bully.

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Joy

Mom has comical response to commenters who complained she was too old for her outfit choices

She made the cardinal offense of being 37 and daring to not dress like a grandma.

Photo by Daniel Monteiro on Unsplash

What happened to dressing your age?

Once women reach a certain age, society does something weird. It starts sending messages that you're simply too old to dress as if you have a social life. In general, it seemed as if society had been moving away from those unrealistic expectations laid upon moms and women over the age of 35, but maybe not.

Jessica Buwick, a mom on TikTok, found out fairly quickly that people still have interesting ideas about how "old people" should dress when going out in public. The 37-year-old mom ordered a plethora of outfits to try on to wear for her son's graduation, prompted by her seeing other moms on social media dressing much more fancy for graduations than parents did when she graduated.

It was a silly, lighthearted video showing her trying on all of the outfits that did not make the cut for various reasons. One was too short and didn't zip. Another was ill-fitting and confusing. They were obvious catastrophes that just didn't work, so she made the misfortune into funny content. And people had a lot to say.

Many people laughed along, while others took the opportunity to take jabs at the mom's fashion choices.

One commenter decided to point her in the right direction by commenting, "Maybe YOU should have shopped in an age-appropriate section of the store so you don't look like a SKANK in your clothing, thereby humiliating your poor son."

Yikes. That was a bit harsh and, sadly, a common theme as multiple people pointed out how she was going to embarrass her son.

@jessicabuwick

#graduation #graduationfail #dressfail #graduationoutfit #graduationoutfitideas

But instead of letting the haters get to her, she decided to follow up with a video of more "appropriate" outfits for an elderly mother to wear while attending her child's graduation.

"Apparently I triggered a whole demographic of y'all when I shared my dress options for my son's high school graduation. A lot of you were horrified with my choices," Buwick continued. "Apparently they were not appropriate for a high school graduation nor for someone of my age...37."

Clearly, the mom received the message and proved it by donning a floor-length gown with long sleeves to make sure minimal skin was showing. In another outfit that gave off Julie Andrews vibes, she burst into song to complete the look, though she nixed that dress because the sleeve was slightly sheer. The outfit she settled on at the end was clearly more the speed she thought the commenters were expecting.

Watch:

@jessicabuwick

Thank you for coming #graudation #graduationdresses #formaldresses

She took the comments in stride and made others laugh while doing so. Her son's graduation had already passed, and in a follow-up video she showed the outfit she decided to go with—a cute pair of dress shorts, a tank top and a brightly colored blazer. While I'm sure someone will disagree with that outfit choice as well, Buwick seems to have found a perfectly hilarious way to handle the negativity.


This article originally appeared two years ago.

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Humor

TikTok star shows us what happens when 'sexy' role-playing goes laughably wrong

"Why would you have so many thumbtacks?"

Photo by Kenny Eliason on Unsplash
a woman stares into a man's eyes lovingly

You're trying to spice things up in the bedroom because, why not, right? You read in one of those "ten ways to have more fun in bed" articles that role-playing with your partner could really take things up a notch. But sometimes, what seems like a saucy idea at the time goes completely off the rails. Canadian TikTok star Josh Richards created a hilarious clip where he exemplifies all the ways a night of role-playing could fail. In the clip, entitled "When Role Play Goes Wrong," a woman clad in lingerie nervously proposes, "Do you wanna try, like, role play tonight?"

Josh agrees but admits he's not sure where to begin. She takes the reins, and things immediately get complicated. "It's 1910, New York," she suggests. "I'm a little orphan girl, and you're the shopkeeper." (He then confirms she's at least of legal age.) "I've been stealing some thumbtacks from you, only this time, oops, I've been caught." It gets worse from there and devolves into a plan involving the evasion of the orphanage's "madam."


Unfortunately, Josh's character then gets a bit too literal. "Why would you have so many thumbtacks?"

She tries again. "How 'bout this? You're a chef in France, and I'm a rat with dreams of becoming a culinary master." Josh, rightfully, points out that this is the plot of the Pixar movie Ratatouille. After she tries to convince him, he says, "I'm not sure the whole rat sex thing is really doing it for me."

Totally fair.

Many on Reddit also seem eager to share their hilariously "unique" role-playing misfires. In what seems to be an earnest question on a subreddit thread, someone asks for examples of odd and outrageous role-play ideas. But for the most part, the comment section does not take this request seriously.

All the President's Men

File:Mountrushmore.jpg - Wikipediaen.wikipedia.org

One suggests trying different presidents to get your partner in the mood. "Four nights in a row. Each night you dress up as a different president from Mt. Rushmore."

Secret Probation

Hungry Pizza GIF by Pudgy PenguinsGiphy

Another gets extremely detailed and really hates glitter. "I’m a pizza delivery man, she’s VERY hungry. I deliver a pizza to her house, but it turns out she doesn’t have any cash to tip. No worries, she’s got something else for me. She invites me in, and I watch her slowly and methodically use some popsicle sticks and glue to make a snowflake.

I’m really bored, but she tells me I can’t leave. Not yet. She then proceeds to sprinkle glitter all over the snowflake. I hate glitter. She doesn’t care. She wants me to be upset. This is all a game to her. Finally, after two hours of watching her craft, I’ve had enough. I can’t take it anymore, so I leave. But unfortunately, I find out I’m fired because I took so long on this delivery, and my boss said I was already on secret probation.

The Portly Meteorologist

Live Tv Radar GIF by The Weather ChannelGiphy

This one gets complicated and eventually is ruined by the misplacement of an important item. "Portly meteorologist Doug borrows money from his widowed neighbor Tammy to pay for a broken fence caused by his estranged son's fiancée Margie, who has a penchant for drinking while operating a child's motorized big wheel. Doug falls on hard times and realizes he cannot pay back his debt and must make things right with more untraditional means of restitution. Tammy, while on the older side of Doug, still maintains a feisty demeanor despite being legally blind. To pay back her errors, Margie is called upon to film the encounter with a vintage JVC home movie recorder purchased from Goodwill. But first, she must locate the missing charging cable."

And of course, comedian Gary Gulman’s bit on the matter speaks for itself.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

sex
Pets

This couple has the clingiest cat on Earth and people can't get enough of his cute demands

There are clingy cats—and then there's Chase.

@dontstopmeowing/TikTok

Chase might just be the clingiest cat ever.

Cats are quirky. We all know this.

But those of us who have had multiple cats throughout our lives know that some cats are quirkier than others. Maybe they like to sleep with their face in a shoe (true story). Maybe they won't stop tearing into bags of Styrofoam packing peanuts and eating them, necessitating a shipping business to switch to cornstarch-based packaging (also true story). Maybe they can catch a crumpled-up piece of paper you toss into the air with their paws and bring it to you in their mouth like a dog playing fetch (awww, I miss that cat).

Or maybe their unique quirk is that they have to be velcroed to someone's body every minute of every day.

That's Chase the cat in a nutshell—super sweet, but super clingy.

Chase belongs to Kareem and Fifi of the TikTok channel @dontstopmeowing. The couple have become Internet famous for their three very chill cats. Their "spaw day" videos showing how their cats—Chase, Skye, and Millie—get pampered went viral in 2021, and they've gained a huge following sharing life with their cats.

All three are adorable, but Chase—oh, Chase is a special one. I've seen some clingy cats before, but nothing like this.

Watch:

@dontstopmeowing

Same Cat, Diff Day #fyp #foryou #foryoupage

Literally clingy, as in "won't stop clinging to the human." How many cats like to be carried around like a baby? Not many, I'd guess.

@dontstopmeowing

Not exactly your average kitty #fyp #foryou #foryoupage

When Chase wants Mommy, chase wants Mommy.

@dontstopmeowing

Where did he learn to be so clingy? 😭 #fyp #foryou #foryoupage

Of course, Chase doesn't always want Mommy. Sometimes it's Daddy's turn for all the lovin'.

@dontstopmeowing

😔💔 #fyp #foryou #foryoupage

Fifi shares videos of her attempting to train the clinginess out of Chase, which are hilarious. This one has been viewed 57 million times.

@dontstopmeowing

This is why he rips my clothes 😭 #fyp #foryou #foryoupage

She even dubbed the viral audio of a toddler video—"I just a baby!"—that fits perfectly with Chase's huggy antics.

@dontstopmeowing

He really thinks he’s a baby #fyp #foryou #foryoupage

Oh Chase. You're just too much.

@dontstopmeowing

I can’t stop laughing 😭 #fyp #foryou #foryoupage

And just because it's so dang cute, check out this video of Chase meeting a baby for the first time. (Warning: Wicked adorable baby giggles incoming. Hold onto your ovaries if you have 'em.)

@dontstopmeowing

Who’s reaction was your favorite? #fyp #foryou #foryoupage

The couple welcomed their first human baby, Taj, in January 2024 and Chase certainly had a hard time adjusting.


@dontstopmeowing

That guilty face at the end..#fyp #forypu #foryoupage

But today, it looks like Kareem, Fifi, Taj, Chase, Skye, and Millie are all one big happy family.

@dontstopmeowing

Not him parking his car 😭 #fyp #foryou #foryoupage

Keep up with the family on their TikTok and YouTube.


This article originally appeared three years ago.

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