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“A balm for the soul”
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GOOD PEOPLE Book
upworthy

success

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Not getting derailed by bad starts by accepting that they're bound to happen.

In many ways, it’s our relationship to the bad days, not the good ones, that have the biggest influence on our success.

Sure, those magical moments when our physical abilities, motivation, energy levels and creativity all just seem to click into place are glorious. But these are never the days when people are at risk of giving up on their dreams. It’s when things get hard, that our vision becomes blurry.

Few folks can attest to this quite like elite athletes. Sure, their physical prowess is next level, but their mindset is every bit as disciplined, and part of the mental fortitude comes from managing expectations.

Recently Olympian runner Alexi Pappas shared a bit of reframing that completely changed the way she viewed her own bad days. And rest assured—this is solid advice, whether you're going for a gold medal, or simply trying to get out of bed each day.


While appearing on the Rich Roll Podcast in 2021, Pappas shared the “Rule of Thirds” advice, which she writes about in her book Bravey, and was given to her by her coach after a particularly hard day on the track.

This was how he defined the “Rule of Thirds”:

“When you’re chasing a dream, you’re meant to feel good a third of the time, okay a third of the time, and crappy a third of the time.”

The Rule of Thirds is a great way to truly assess whether things are in balance. If you’re having too many crappy days, allow for some recovery. If you’re having too many easy breezy or okay days, maybe it’s time to work a little harder. As long as you’re within the ratio, you are still moving towards your goal. No second guessing necessary.

It also reminds us that poor days are an integral part of the growth process, allowing us to accept, perhaps even embrace them. But either way, we are better able to show up for ourselves.

And trust, showing up, even on the bad days, is key. Pappas has experienced this both in her athletic and creative endeavors as a filmmaker.

“On those days, where the creativity doesn’t come or it doesn't feel great…you still show up. Because maybe that’s your crappy day. But it doesn’t mean that you quit the goal. It doesn’t mean you freak out. It means that you show up and live through that dip…because you're chasing a dream.”

We’ve heard a thousand times that progress is not linear. And yet, that bit of wisdom is often the first thing we forget once things aren’t working out and the negative mental chatter starts setting in. So it’s great to know a) that even high achieving Olympians struggle with bad days too and b) we can incorporate the same coping strategies they use into our own goals.

Bottom line: bad days part of the process. Let them be the helpful guides they are along the path to realizing your vision.

If you’d like to catch the full podcast episode, which has a ton of other mindset gems, watch below.

Achieving Audacious Dreams: Alexi Pappas Is Bravey | Rich Roll Podcastwww.youtube.com

If I could sum up my young adult life in one sentence, it would author J.R.R. Tolkien's famous "not all who wander are lost."

I wandered a lot during my time as a University of Pennsylvania student. I made mistakes that turned into memories. I found love that turned into heartbreak. I blindly pursued a profession (investment banking) before finding my passion (cartooning).


With school back in session, many alumni like myself are reminiscing about our college days. Others are just beginning their college journeys as freshmen, and some are seniors getting ready for one last hurrah.

These years are a time of breakthroughs and breakups. Success and stress. Wherever you may be on that journey, know that you’re not alone. These 14 cartoons sum up many of the life lessons we learn in college and as young adults.

1. There’s only one type of competition you should really worry about.

All illustrations by Jon Youshaei/Every Vowel, used with permission.

2. But don’t stress yourself out. Remember to ask for help.

3. Find friends who push you outside your comfort zone.

4. Finding real friends won’t always be easy…

5. …but it’s always worth it.

6. When it comes to romance, remember that it requires more effort than just swiping right.

7. It takes time to turn a relationship into something special.

8. Learn to have difficult conversations.

9. But try to empathize even when you disagree.

10. Chase your dreams. Not someone else’s.

11. When it comes to finding jobs, don’t be discouraged.

12. Because “no” is just another way of saying “not yet.”

13. You can only study so much. The best way to get experience is to just do it.

14. And keep at it. Success is closer than you realize.

Have a friend who could use this advice? Maybe share it with them.

You can find more of my work at EveryVowel.com.

Completing a master's degree, doctoral degree, or professional program is a big deal. When you're all done, a celebration is in order.

This is especially true for black students, who are still underrepresented at the highest academic levels. That's why these recent graduates are shouting each other out in an awesome way.

[rebelmouse-image 19526847 dam="1" original_size="400x222" caption="GIF from "The Daily Show."" expand=1]GIF from "The Daily Show."


Since the commencement regalia for master's, doctoral, and professional students often includes a hood, black graduates are posting selfies and giving each other well-earned props using the hashtag #BlackAndHooded.

It's a celebration of black joy, persistence, and talent.

The new grads behind the hashtag, Anthony Wright and Brian Allen, earned their master's degrees in higher education and student affairs from Indiana University and Columbia University, respectively, this spring.

While talking with one of his undergraduate students, Wright was reminded of the importance of black graduate student representation. He teamed up with Allen, a friend from his undergraduate days at the University of Wisconsin, and came up with #BlackAndHooded. It's intentionally inclusive of all black students across gender expressions, fields, institutions, and geography.

"Black excellence exists in all facets of education and we're pretty much killing the game," Allen says. "I think [the hashtag] really works to combat the negative notions of inadequacy in academia."

Wright and Allen expanded #BlackAndHooded into an online photo series too.

Recent grads can submit their photos via email and share their institution and field of study. The site is pages and pages of black excellence. At the time of this writing, Wright and Allen have more than 200 graduates on the BlackAndHooded site and are even honoring "Grads of the Week."

"The hashtag is cool, but ... they go away after a few weeks," Wright says. "I wanted to have something consistently available — all the images and not just tweets."

The number of black students earning advanced degrees is on the rise, but we're not done yet.

Black enrollment at post-secondary institutions has increased since the 1990s and advanced degree attainment has followed suit. In 1990, 5.6% of master's and 4.7% of doctoral degrees were conferred to black recipients. In 2013, those numbers jumped to 13.6% and 8%, respectively. They're baby steps, but they're headed in the right direction.

A community-conscious, action-oriented EDUCATOR ✊🏾💙 #BLACKANDHOODED #ZΦB #MasterOfEducation #MASTERED

A post shared by Jessica L. Williams (@jleannaw) on

We'll get there. Because behind that data are real living, dreaming black people. Disregard us at your own peril. These students are putting in work and making the impossible possible in a system that was not designed for their success. This celebration is for them, and they've certainly earned it.

Wright and Allen both hope this project inspires black people to pursue their dreams, not just in academia but wherever they may lead.

The road to success doesn't always go through higher education, and that's OK. But seeing their black peers work hard and accomplish their dreams across different fields and disciplines may be just the motivation someone needs to go for it.

"I hope it inspires people to push themselves to achieve their goals, regardless of what those goals are," Wright says.

For every happy, proud smiling face you see in this photos, there's a lot you don't see.

Earning an advanced degree requires years of research; tough projects, teaching, or work assignments; sleepless nights; and enough reading to make your head spin. There are days when you don't know if you'll make it. There are days when you question yourself and your abilities. But you persist, not just for yourself, but your family, your community. And you do it for a moment like this:

An advanced degree is much more than a piece of paper, it's an achievement earned by the best and brightest. And no one can take that away.

Hats off to the class of 2017, and the people who love and support them.

This is your time. Go ahead and show out!

There's something about actress Jessica Chastain you wouldn't necessarily pick up on while watching her on the big screen or gracing red carpets.

She's shy. (Like really, truly shy.)

Photo by Alberto Pizzoli/AFP/Getty Images.


“I’m almost having a breakdown right now,” she admitted to James Lipton recently during an interview on "Inside the Actors Studio."

"You’re still shy?” he asked her.

“Yes, I’m so shy,” she answered.

To her biggest fans, her shyness may not be news. She's talked publicly about it before.

As Chastain explained to Chelsea Handler on "Chelsea" earlier this year (emphasis added):

"[Being on a movie set] is less intimidating to me than social circumstances. This weekend, I went to a party — it was Katy Perry’s party — and I was just like, ‘Why am I at this party? I’m not as cool as these people, and at some point they’re going to realize that I shouldn’t be here.’ But I feel like, on a film set, 'OK, I have a reason to be here.'"

​Photo by Valery Hache/AFP/Getty Images.

Chastain's shyness may be surprising for a couple reasons.

For one, she doesn't seem like someone who's shy. She's an Academy Award-nominated actress who's owned the silver screen in blockbusters like "The Martian" and had us cracking up in "The Help." How can such a Hollywood A-lister be shy?

She's also wildly successful. And shyness isn't something we necessarily associate with successful people.

But maybe we should.

​Photo by Valery Hache/AFP/Getty Images.

As Chastain's career proves, being shy isn't a death sentence for ambitions. In fact, it could be just the opposite.

While shyness may be a hinderance to a person's success in some ways — like feeling nervous about meeting new people at a networking event, for instance — people who are shy tend to have other strengths in their corner.

Shy people tend to be great listeners and, thus, total rockstars when it comes to observing the world around them. As Greatist points out, research suggests people are more productive and creative when they're able to work privately — often a preference for shy and introverted folks (introversion and shyness are different, by the way). And on the more personal side, shy people are more likely to report having a "rich, complex inner life" too.

Whoever said shyness is a weakness clearly wasn't paying close enough attention.

There are many reasons to feel quite all right with being shy. But, according to Chastain, that should never stop you from living your life out loud.

Photo by Robin Marchant/Getty Images for Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences.

“You don’t know if you just don't do it," she told Handler. "If you’re feeling shy or feeling whatever, just throw yourself out there.And maybe it actually changes who you are."