upworthy

parenting hacks

“I don’t even know my plan! Do you know your plan?!”

There are a lot of modern ideas that make sense to those of us who have come of age with them, but it's a really interesting exercise to try to view those same ideas from the perspective of the older generations. It can make things seem pretty absurd. For example:

Gentle parenting has been the anxious millennial antidote to the trauma caused by their boomer parent’s not-so-gentle approach to raising kids. This new wave of parents have become determined to not let history repeat itself, to usher in a kinder, more emotionally secure, more confident generation of humans.

And while that intention is certainly admirable, perhaps we millennials, with all our self-deprecating humor, can also laugh at ourselves a bit with just how gentle we strive to be.

gentle parenting, parenting, parenting advice, Boomers, Gen X, Millennials, parenting hacks A grown woman and her motherImage via Canva

A fun, tongue-in-cheek and instantly viral video created by 37-year-old mom of two Taylor Wolfe can help with that.

The clip, which racked up 5.8 million views in less than 24 hours, shows Taylor trying to teach her boomer mother Sandy Wolfe all the ins-and-outs of gentle parenting so that she may use these more compassionate tactics on her grandkids.

@thedailytay

GENTLE HANDS. 🙃🫶🏻🤭❤️ #fyp #millennialsoftiktok #momsoftiktok #gentleparenting #parentsoftiktok #foryoupag #comedyvideo


Let’s just say, many found her failed attempt completely relatable, not to mention hilarious.

Sandy’s well intentioned “Be careful!” to her granddaughter gets met with Taylor saying, “We don’t say ‘Be careful!’ anymore. Instead say, ‘What’s your plan here?’”

“I don’t even know my plan! Do you know your plan?!” Sandy retorts.

Cut to: Sandy says “Stop. Don’t hit your sister.” Suddenly Taylor pops up from behind a corner to instruct: “Don’t say, ‘Stop,’ say, ‘Gentle.’”

“‘Gentle’…what?” asks a confused Sandy.

“‘Gentle hands,’” quips Taylor, adding. “‘Gentle’ everything.”

gentle parenting, parenting advice, parenting, parenting hacks, Boomers, Gen X, Millennials, mothers, daughters An adult woman and her older motherImage via Canva

Sandy can’t even catch a break when she says “I’m so proud of you.” because, as Taylor explains, “you’re not supposed to tell kids you’re proud of them anymore. That’s putting the focus on you.”

Then a classic comedy of errors ensues as Taylor advises Sandy to say “you should be so proud” and Sandy replies “I AM so proud!”

Viewers could help but laugh at their own perhaps overzealous attempts to bring gentle parenting into their life.

“I tried to gentle parent this morning but it turned into ‘OMG GET YOUR FORKING SHOES ON,”” one person wrote, while another added, “I always started with the Mary Poppins approach but sometimes you need to elevate to Judge Judy.”

Others felt like this perfectly depicted how gentle parenting sometimes misses the mark.

“I’m feeling anxious after observing gentle parenting,” one person wrote.

Another simply said, “I stand with grandma.”

This isn’t the first time Taylor and Sandy have given us a good chuckle comparing their different parenting styles. Here’s another funny video from August of 2023 where Taylor is flabbergasted to hear how her mother managed without Google:

Listen, gentle parenting is great for providing parents more mindful, less reactive responses to their kids, which can do wonders for everybody. But there’s also something to be said for not getting so wound up in the minutia of every parent-child interaction, thinking anything and everything could be threatening to a child’s development. As with anything, balance—and a sense of humor—is always key.

Follow along on more of Taylor’s fun and relatable content on TikTok.

This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

This hack would work on adults as well.

Honestly, what parent hasn’t told a little white lie to their kids here and there to make life easier? Especially when it comes to food-related things, whether that be sneaking in a veggie or two into “safe” meals, making healthy snacks seem a little more fun and novel by mimicking charcuterie boards, or in one mom’s case, concocting an elaborate ruse to make homemade food look like takeout.

Mom Alex MacLaren is clearly a good cook, making anything from chicken cacciatore to blueberry banana loaf to fancy Greek salad. And yet, even she has a hard time getting her kids to eat her restaurant-worthy meals. That is, until she started telling them it was from a restaurant.

In the video below, we see MacLaren’s ploy in action. “We ordered in food, this is an Italian place. They sent us a lot of food, you guys!” she announces while unpacking a brown paper bag.

@mac.larena

🚨 NEW SERIES 🚨 Takeout but made at home 🤭 #easyweeknightmeals #momlife Make plates with me, dishing up dinner ideas, cheap meals on a budget


MacLaren goes full method on this, having the beans, tortellini minestrone soup and chicken dish with rice in their own legit to-go trays. And the kids, well, they eat it up. Literally.

“Who wants soup and who wants chicken?” we hear MacLaren ask, to which the children cheer “Me,” “Chicken!” and “I want the big one!”

In an interview with Today, MacLaren shared that she first got the idea a few months prior, after ordering takeout containers from Amazon to pack her daughter’s lunches. It worked so well for lunch, she figured it had to be a nifty dinner hack as well. And she was correct. MacLaren has only played this trick a small handful of times so far, but it’s worked every time.

Like below, where she convinces the kiddos that they are eating from a Greek restaurant, compatible with garlic pita bread. For a second there’s a close call when one of McLaren's kids says “Wait, that’s the same container ...” but she quickly evades, replying, “All the restaurants use the same containers.”

@mac.larena

Replying to @Shira the plot thickens 😅 #easyweeknightmeals #momlife cheap dinners in a budget, takeout recipes


Needless to say, many, many fellow parents are pretty amazed by this scheme.

“Mommy marketing wins again,” one viewer quipped, while another said, "It’s all about the rebrand.”

Another even joked, “Those kids are masters at being gaslit. As a human, be ashamed. As a mom, you’re my hero!!!!”

Apparently, MacLaren isn’t the only mom to have this rebrand idea. One person shared, “I do this! My son loves Chinese but not when I make it. Little does he know, I have been making it and just putting it in takeout containers. He eats it the same as when we order in.”

One viewer asked the question sure to be on many of our minds: “how do the kids not see MacLaren cooking up this “fake out take-out”? In a follow-up video, MacLaren quells our curiosity by revealing the basement she secretly plugs her crock pot in. Now that’s commitment.

@mac.larena

Replying to @Jess nothing to see here 😉 #takeoutathome #momlife #easyweeknightmeals


Yet another even admitted, “I fear this would work on me as an adult.” which is so true. There’s something about food “magically" landing on your doorstop, practically gift-wrapped, that makes it feel much more special than having to slave over a hot stove. Of course, the oils and flavor enhancers don’t hurt, either.

As far as her feelings about lying to her kids are concerned, MacLaren admitted to Today that “gaslighting is a pretty big part of my parenting strategy,” adding, “Why are we overthinking everything?” And perhaps she has a point. Sometimes the ends really do justify the means. Especially when it comes to getting kids to eat their dang food.

Kids watching television

You can read all the books, listen to all the advice, join all the FB groups, and still, you won’t be fully prepared for every parenting curve ball that comes your way. During these times of, let’s face it, desperation, parents might get a little creative. Perhaps a little white lie here, and gamification of something there, whatever does the trick.

Recently a mom named Michaela Estrada, who had two boys under the age of four and hoped to have more kids in the future, asked fellow moms to share their “most unhinged” hacks.

She further clarified her request, writing, “I’m not talking about letting them run around naked and unashamed in the backyard. I need the craziest hacks of the 21st century.”

parenting, parenting hacks, motherhood, mom hacks, mommy fb group, mommy blogger, kids, parenting humorTikTok · Michaela Estradawww.tiktok.com

Millions of views later, folks delivered. Big time. And boy are they a fun read, whether you’re a parent or not. As one viewer said, “do I have a kid? No. did I read all of these comments? Yes.”

Here are some of our faves:

"We did Cinderella Sundays. We cleaned all morning, then they wore their princess dresses to our fancy candle-lit dinner, followed by a dance party 'ball.'"

@sari.rous.c

mi hermanita🤣 #cenicienta #limpiando #jajajaj🤣

"I use a kabuki brush to put sunscreen on my son while saying 'tickle tickle' over and over again. It's the only way he'll stay still for a minute for me to make sure he's covered."

"Whenever it's bed time and they are still stuck to Netflix or similar, I change the language to Greek or polish and tell them they don't understand cause they are too tired and it's bed time!"

"My mom hid all my dolls and stuffed animals and said they ran away 'cause my room was dirty. They sent a 'postcard' from another kid's clean room. When I cleaned [my room] they returned."

parenting, parenting hacks, motherhood, mom hacks, mommy fb group, mommy blogger, kids, parenting humorStuffed animalsPhoto credit: Canva

"My mom used to tell us she was allergic to loud noises, so when she was overstimulated, she would say she was having an allergic reaction. [It] worked until a doctor asked me if any allergies ran in the family."

"Our parents told us that whining was illegal in Cape Cod (where we vacationed in the early 2000s), and when we'd hear sirens [it meant] 'someone must have been whining.' We believed them for YEARSSS!"

"Potty room for potty words! My 3-year-old will excuse himself to the bathroom to 'curse' and we’ll hear him going 'dang it,' 'what the heck,' 'Imma beat up all the strangers,' and it has us DYING!"

@dntuncontained

#badwords #badkids #parenting #Moms #Dads #cursewords #bathroom #slick #talk #whatyousay #pottymouth #littlegurl #caughtyou #what #sayit #dntuncontained #fytシ #fytiktok #govirl #funnyvideo


"Told the kids that Santa/Easter Bunny/Tooth Fairy had to follow OSHA standards for workplace safety. They wouldn’t come if their room was a mess with tripping hazards."

"Gave my daughter a bag and told her to 'go shopping' for toys at our house. Five minutes later, she had picked up everything off the floor and put it in her bag."

"My mom told me and my brothers if we hid from her in the clothing racks at stores the employees would take us and turn us into mannequins."

parenting, parenting hacks, motherhood, mom hacks, mommy fb group, mommy blogger, kids, parenting humorA child mannequinPhoto credit: Canva

"We have pet fish, and I told my kids they are Santa’s secret spies all year long to make sure they are behaving. When they get crazy, I whisper, 'The fish are watching.' They love and fear the spy fish."

"Who wants to guess what mommy is going to get you for your birthday?! Then I go buy that. Same with Santa."

"My daughter fights sleep like a Roman gladiator because she has chronic FOMO (fear of missing out), so we brainstorm something fun to do in our dreams together so she ends up in a hurry to meet dinosaurs together or something."

@crazy.kids74

Visit TikTok to discover videos!

"When my daughter was little, she wanted to say swear words. We told her swear words are for adults but she could make up her own for kids. She chose 'Stewart.' 'This traffic is a real Stewart.'"

"I told my kids that the ice cream man plays music to let everyone know he's sorry, but he’s out of ice cream and hopes we enjoy the music and to try again tomorrow."

"When my mom folded laundry she dumped all the socks on the floor and sat us down around them. Whoever got the most pairs won. We had so much fun and she didn't have to sort them."

parenting, parenting hacks, motherhood, mom hacks, mommy fb group, mommy blogger, kids, parenting humorcolorful socksPhoto credit: Canva

"I tell them their tongue is constantly growing new taste buds so they should keep trying new food even if they didn’t like them last time. Is this true? Idk, my dad told me the same thing."

"Make your child a Gmail account with their name before it gets taken. Then send them photos, videos, messages, etc. throughout their life so they have a digital journal of their childhood."

"We told my son broccoli, zucchini and Brussels sprouts grows muscles, and we do an arm muscle check after he eats. He gets so excited that he eats it all. We 'oooh and ahhh,' and he just giggles."

@laceygregory1

Visit TikTok to discover videos!

"My kid HATES teethbrushing but likes blowing out candles, so we brush teeth by candlelight then let her blow them out."

"When my friend's teens acted up, instead of grounding them, she would ground herself. For example, 'I'm sorry, I would love to drive you to the mall, but unfortunately I'm grounded.'"

"Ever since my daughter was little I’d give her an imaginary chill pill to eat when she was acting crazy. She’s eight and still 'takes them' to calm down."

parenting, parenting hacks, motherhood, mom hacks, mommy fb group, mommy blogger, kids, parenting humorA fiction bottle of "chill pills"Photo credit: Canva

"My kid's preferred method of washing the soap from his hair is if we pretend to waterboard him while screaming, 'Where's the muffin man?' He used to freak before my husband started doing this."

"If they want to tattle I tell them I can’t hear another tattle and that our dog Archie will listen to the tattle and report it back to me. So they go lay it all out to the dog."

"When my daughter gets her burst of energy late at night, I turn on kids' exercise videos on YouTube, and since she does them, it tires her out enough that she knocks out right after."

@sprinkleinlearning

Core and Cones 💪 This challenge always gets my competitive kiddos off the couch. They don’t even realize they are working on core, stability, reactive agility and more! #sprinkleinlearning #coreworkout #coreworkouts #corework #corechallenge #stability #react #reactiontime #situps #kidsactivity #kidsactivityideas #kidactivities #kidactivity #grossmotor #grossmotorskills #grossmotordevelopment #muscletone #lowmuscletone #physicaltherapy #keepkidsactive #activekids #activekidsarehappykids #healthykids #workoutforbeginners #playideas #playideasforkids #playidea #momlife #momof3 #parenthood


"Speed bumps and oil spots in parking lots are kids that got ran over, because they didn't hold their parents' hand."

"Not unhinged, but literally the best thing I ever did was make myself understand that it's their first time here. They are still learning how to do the things I find easy."

"My mom pulled us out of school individually on different days without telling us when and would surprise us with lunch at Olive Garden. She'd then ask us really personal questions to gauge how we were doing."

parenting, parenting hacks, motherhood, mom hacks, mommy fb group, mommy blogger, kids, parenting humorA family at an Italian restaurantPhoto credit: Canva

"Making a 'kids charcuterie board' by putting mostly healthy options on it — you’d be surprised how much they eat and test out new and healthy foods."

"I used to buy scary masks and put them in the cupboards that I didn’t want them to get into when they inevitably broke the child lock. They don’t even open them now, lol."

"Let them help cook! My twins are autistic and were such picky eaters because of the textures. Once I started letting them cook with me, they started eating a lot more and wanting to try new foods!"

@cookingwithcarter

Todaaay we are making a cheese and @Heinz UK bean toastie with our @TheCrimpit 😁 #food #toddler #toddlersoftiktok #cooking #fyp #gordonramsay #cookingwithcarter #cookinghacks #kids #chef #cheflife #masterchef #jamieoliver #toastie

"Every time my kids cried, I told them to drink water because their tears would run out. They drink the water, and then they stop crying, also, when they don't listen to you, they start to whisper."

"My kids don’t get in trouble if they’re honest. No punishment if you fess up to doing the wrong thing. We’ll talk about it, but no punishment. They make the right choices 99% of the time. When they make mistakes, they call me when they’re uncomfortable with situations their friends are trying to get them in, etc. It’s been life-changing. No sneaky kids."

"I taught my kids that the TV needs to charge so when they’re done screen time. I just say, 'Okay guys, the TV needs to charge now,' and it goes off. They fully believe the TV charges."

parenting, parenting hacks, motherhood, mom hacks, mommy fb group, mommy blogger, kids, parenting humorKids watching televisionPhoto credit: Canva

"As toddlers, when you put them to bed, give them three tickets. They can use the tickets for water, the bathroom, or a question. After the tickets are gone, that's it."

"Every Oct/Nov/Dec I change their dad's name in my phone to Santa Clause that way, they see it on my screen or in the car (they read the screen in the car a lot) they think it’s Santa checking in."

And lastly:

"Bedtime hack: ask your kids what they want to have as a bedtime story about, and have ChatGPT make it. Bonus, add their names to include them in the story!"

@megan.bennett.freeman

AI customized bedtime stories for the win! #parenting #ai #chatgpt #bedtimeroutine #toddler #mom #greenscreen

An angry mom yelling at her teenage daughter.

A new video by certified parenting coach Destini Ann is refreshing to many parents who have overreacted once or twice or, most likely, dozens of times while in the line of duty. She believes it’s acceptable to stop when you’ve lost control and call a do-over. Although that may seem hard for some parents, it’s all about catching yourself in the act.

Destini says the key is having the self-awareness to know that once you realize you’ve made a mistake, you can quickly pop out of that moment before making a regrettable parenting decision. It’s a powerful tool, especially when you get a bad night’s sleep and wake up to your kid spilling Cheerios on the couch.

In a video with over 14,000 views, Destini says the powerful phrase we all need to keep in our hip pockets is: “Let me try that again."

How to stop yelling at my kids

“When we are stuck in these parenting cycles that we’re trying to get out of, your awareness might catch you doing the inappropriate behavior. But for some of us, that brings on shame and it kind of makes it even harder in the moment to stop,” Destini says. “Get out of your head about ‘Oh my goodness, I can’t fix the moment.’ Guess what? You’re right! The moment has already passed. You yelled. ‘Let me try that again’ allows you to create another moment. So when you walk in the room and the clothes are beside the hamper instead of in the hamper and you start going off, when that signal pops in your head that you’re doing too much, you can give yourself a redo!”

@destini.ann

When you’re jumping to conclusions before asking questions… “let me try that again.” When you led with sarcasm instead of assertiveness… “let me try that again” When “who do you think you’re talking to, I’m not the one” rolled off your tongue EFFORTLESSLY… “let me try that again” “Let me try that again” gives you permission to make mistakes WITHOUT the shame that makes you either escalate or retreat without setting the expectation, boundary or standard. It lets you show up to parenting understanding that while you’re healing, you can still have a script and system that allows you to more easily return to integrity and create positive moments after mistakes. These kinds repetitious scripts are a path of least resistance. They build my awareness and accountability muscles💪🏾 . I don’t have to turn it into a huge moment, I don’t have to come up with some creative “fix” or walk away and go regulate. I can say the same thing I said last time and signal my brain to DO IT OVER.

Destini notes that we may feel a moment of shame for either approaching the situation with a little too much gusto or breaking character as a parent and reversing course mid-scream. But there’s nothing wrong with that. You and your family will appreciate the brief moment of reflection and the redirect.

“‘My bad. Let me try that again. Mommy’s doing too much. Let’s put the clothes in the hamper, OK?” doesn’t that sound a lot better than kicking yourself for the next few hours for blowing your top and feeling like a terrible parent?

Is it bad to yell at my kids?

It can also stop a lot of trouble before it begins. According to Better Help, yelling at a child can create problems for them in the long and short term. “In the short term, a child who is on the receiving end of yelling may become aggressive, anxious, and withdrawn. In the long term, as a result of childhood emotional abuse, they may develop anxiety, low self-esteem, depression, and a negative view of themselves,” an article reviewed by Julie Dodson, MA, LCSW, states.



The video was a hit with Destini’s followers, who feel that every parent deserves a redo. "I love this approach. I absolutely own up each time I need an attitude adjustment. I want to be an example to my children that we can change course and acknowledge when we’re not behaving nicely," Laura wrote in the comments. "Thank you! I feel so stuck and so guilty when I don’t keep it together. This is something I know I can do," Gioia wrote.

"I needed this!!!!! That's the worst. I do not feel like I can have a redo! Thank you," Alicia wrote.

There is no such thing as perfect parents; sooner or later, we will all fall short of our expectations. The key is how you handle it when it happens. You can get carried away in a negative cycle of yelling and feeling bad for yourself. Or, be conscious that at any time, you can stop and say, “Let me try that again.” It’ll come in handy next time you walk into your kid’s bedroom and see they’ve drawn Pokémon characters on the wall in Sharpie.