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Mom shows off mother-in-law's comically generous "sick care package" and it's so relatable

Mothers-in-law giveth and they annoyeth.

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Putting the "care" in care package.

In my experience, grandparents like to give a lot of...stuff. It can be overwhelming and frustrating, bringing all these things into your home that you have to find a place for, all of it adding to the clutter and mental load. And I know I'm not the only one. Some informal surveys say 75% of parents are frustrated that grandparents give the kids too many gifts. Based on the parents I know, that number easily checks out. And it's not just gifts, but food, baked goods, and groceries that we don't ask for—it's all too much!

It's a double-edged sword, though, because sometimes the stuff is great and really helpful. It's important to remember that there is a lot of generosity and love behind grandparents' (sometimes outlandish) gifting. It's a way for them to stay connected to the family when they can't always be there during the day-to-day. A little gift here and there is a way to show the grandkids they love them, and sending a batch of brownies you definitely don't want to be eating is just their little way of helping out.

To that end, a mom on TikTok recently showed off her outrageous haul from her mother-in-law, who sent a laughably generous care package when the family was sick with the flu.

gif of Alf sickMom-in-law went above and beyond to answer the sick family's call.Giphy

Makenzie Hubbell can barely contain her laughter as she begins telling the story on camera.

"My entire family is sick and we asked our mother-in-law to shop for us, so this is everything she got. "

Hubbell then holds up two eight-packs of Gatorade, or enough to hydrate a professional sports team.

"We asked for some goldfish for my son, for when he starts eating." Cue enormous, bulk-sized tub of Goldfish crackers. Then two giant bags of Tyson's chicken nuggets. "We asked for ground turkey. She got us two," Hubbell says, showing off the packs.

"Did not ask for these, but very thankful," she says, holding up a container of strawberries. "Strawberries are very expensive."

It went on and on. A huge package of chicken breast that could feed their family for a week. But the package wasn't just food and rations. There was a book for the little one, cupcakes for mom's birthday, and a gift in an adorable bag (spoiler: It's a candle and a t-shirt).

The care package was a veritable clown car of supplies and gifts. It's safe to say that mom-in-law went way overboard, in the way that grandparents do. Watch Hubbell show it all off here:


@chunkymak

i fear the gatorade wont last more than 3 days😂😭 #plussize #plussizeedition #groceries #groceryhaul

Commenters related heavily to the video, and it's got us wondering if mother-in-laws have been getting a bad rap all this time.

Turns out that mothers-in-law, despite their reputation, are coming in clutch all over the place! We might not always see eye to eye, but they're some of the most reliable and generous family members out there.

"You won the Mother in Law lottery."

"This is my MIL but she gives so much and won’t allow us to pay any portion back"

"My exs mother, my oldest son’s grandma, drops off a care package of groceries every time she goes to Costco. Always a rotisserie chicken. Muffins, fruit, snacks for school and fresh veggies."

"Welcome to the best mother in law club. My husband had a lot of health issues before he passed and my MIL would schedule her cleaning lady to come over the day before he came home from the hospital."

"My MIL is the same way…but times 4. If I asked her to pick some things up, it would be a haul. Those of us that are blessed, APPRECIATE!"

"So happy when I hear positive MIL stories on this app. While I am not one nor do I have one it always seems like they’re getting such a bad rap."

To add to the comedy of it all, Hubbell's mother-in-law was back with more rations and an entire pharmacy's-worth of medical supplies the very next day:

@chunkymak

Replying to @weetchofthewoods she also got us the sams club big pack of pampers cruisers in the wrong size so she's going to exchange them but she's got such a huge heart🩷 #plussize #plussizeedition #groceries #groceryhaul

Conflict between women and their mothers-in-law might be a little exaggerated by sitcoms and stand-up comics, but it is a tricky relationship to manage.

Mothers-in-law are naturally protective of their own children and have strong feelings and opinions about how their grandchildren are being raised. Communication and boundaries are key, but can be a challenge for any family to navigate with grandparents.

Case in point: Just as many commenters on Hubbell's video expressed regret that they didn't have nearly as good of a relationship with their own MIL.

It's a good exercise for any married person to look past the conflicts and disagreements and recognize how generous grandparents, and especially those pesky mothers-in-law, can be with their time and money. They just love to go overboard like in Hubbell's viral video, and seem to take pride in being more helpful than you could possibly ever ask them to be. Sure, that generosity also comes with a lot of junk and a little more spoiling of the kids than you'd like, but Hubbell's video is a good reminder to stop and be appreciative for just a moment if you're lucky enough to have an overly generous mother-in-law in your life.

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Long-distance Aunt watches baby on FaceTime so desperate mom can take a shower

The 'Virtual Village' is still a village

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If there's one thing burnt out parents yearn for as much as sleep, it has to be a good shower. A hot shower is so soothing. They've been proven to reduce stress and tension while promoting relaxation. Not only that, but feeling clean and fresh afterwards is such a boost to your mood, energy, and self-esteem. It's such a simple but powerful act of self care! And yet for parents of young children who need constant hands-on attention, it can be really difficult to find the alone time to enjoy a good shower; especially if and when they're parenting solo.

Sometimes TV or a cartoon on a tablet can help, but if you've ever hopped in the shower thinking your kids were perfectly content watching TV until you got out, you know what always happens: The second the water hits your skin is the second they end up needing you! Sometimes there's just no replacement for a watchful and engaging human eye to keep your kids occupied while you take care of necessities.

One awesome aunt is going viral for stepping up to help her sister, a mom of two, get a few minutes of quiet and calm. All from miles and miles away.


Giphy

Melasadies Worrell from Georgia recently posted a short video on TikTok with the caption: "When your sister is home with the kids by herself and she needs someone to watch them while she takes a shower. So you use your lunch break to help her."

"She just put [her youngest] to sleep and I told her to leave the phone in front of him, connect me to her speaker in the bathroom and I would say something if he started to move or cry," Worrell told Newsweek. There was also an older child playing quietly in the room, so Worrell could talk to him if the baby needed to be repositioned where he was sleeping.

There's always baby monitors, but if you're in the shower you can't see what's going on. You might hear a thud or a cry, but you also might not. Either way, having another human set of eyes watching is comforting.

"She felt a sense of peace knowing that I was there watching them, even if I couldn't physically do anything. But I could scream out and let her know, 'Wait a second, get out of the shower, he's rolling!'"

In the video, you can see Worrell keeping a watchful eye in the corner of the screen while chowing down on her lunch. The baby, meanwhile, sleeps peacefully through the whole thing. But auntie is still there, just in case!



@melasadiesworrell

This is hilarious to me but effective ! Thank God for FaceTime ! @Kiara smith #momsoftiktok #momlife #auntiesbelike #auntiesoftiktok

Over 2 million people watched Worrell's sweet video. So many people chimed in to say that they also used 'virtual babysitting' just like this in a pinch.

For better or worse, kids today have a high level of comfort with phones and tablets. Almost all of them know how to use FaceTime and navigate their way around various screens. Smart parents are using this to their advantage and taking a page out of the 2020 COVID playbook when we could only communicate with family on video calls and used them to keep kids connected to their grandparents and aunts and uncles.

"That’s what I do every day. My mom is in another country but you bet she gonna watch her granddaughter"

"I did this for my cousin and she had me bluetoothed to a speaker that was in the bathroom that way if the baby needed her or was about to do something dangerous she could hear me lol"

"That’s what I do every day. My mom is in another country but you bet she gonna watch her granddaughter"

"Listen sometimes it’s just knowing someone is LOOKING at them that eases the mind I swear"

"This is the definition of it takes a village"

Did you know that you can even hire virtual babysitters if and when family isn't available? It sounds utterly ridiculous, but it's a modern innovation that can really help struggling parents.

People are spending far more time at home than we used to, and many parents work from home full-time, to boot. The need for classic, traditional babysitting has decreased in a lot of households and given rise to a different sort of need. Parents might not need a babysitter to watch the kids so they can go out for the evening nearly as often as they might just need 30 minutes of quiet to take a shower, join a work call, or fit in some exercise.

Putting the kids on FaceTime with an aunt or grandparent is an amazing way to buy yourself a short break and keep your family connections strong. But in a pinch, a good virtual babysitter can be almost as good. The best ones are fantastic at keeping kids entertained and engaged through games, doing online puzzles together, and making interesting conversation.

It all sounds a little weird, but I love this evolution. Parents need to get creative sometimes to make sure their kids are safe and engaged while they take care of their life, their jobs, or themselves. With so many families spending more and more time cooped up together at home, career and self-care are often sacrificed. But now we know that a 30-minute FaceTime could be just the thing busy parents need to regain some crucial time for themselves.

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A dad realized his son treats Mom very differently when they're alone and it blew his mind

The moms have been trying to tell us!

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A lot of dads are not aware of this.

It's hard out here being a dad. No one would argue that. But studies show dads are actually happier, less tired, and less stressed out than one very special group of people: Moms. It might sound obvious since we know the majority of childcare still tends to fall on women, but the differences between moms and dads hold up even when accounting for total time spent taking care of the kids. So what gives? At the risk of having rotten tomatoes hurled at my head, is it possible that dads are just way more chill and better at handling the stress?

Absolutely not! But it does leave a bit of a mystery. Why are dads faring better even when they spend lots of time taking care of the children? One explanation is that dads often get the easy stuff, like recreation and play, while moms tend to get stuck with more rigorous tasks like logistics, cleaning, cooking, and bathing. But that doesn't explain everything.

One dad recently had an epiphany about exactly why he finds taking care of the kids less taxing than his wife does.

A dad who posts online as @workharddadhard never found solo parenting his son to be all that challenging. He says in a now viral TikTok video that his son would usually just play quietly by himself, ask for things nicely if he needed something, and generally be pretty independent. What he never understood was why solo parenting seemed to leave his wife drained, exhausted, and desperate for help.

"For the longest time I wondered why my wife was always like 'Please, like as soon as you can, get home from work, like whenever you're done please just come home, I could really use your help here. ... It's been a long day.'"

What was she doing differently that made parenting so much harder? One day he got the chance to observe exactly what his wife had been talking about this whole time. He happened to be home during the day while Mom was in charge and saw "our son just do things that he never ever did with me and it was crazy."

"Our kid acts completely different around his mom," he said, adding that the epiphany "blew his mind."

Watch the whole video here:

@workharddadhard

When I was home, our son would play by himself, ask for things nicely, but then when it was just mom, things changed…

Commenters chimed in by the thousands to confirm: Kids are often needier and more poorly behaved for mom. And more dads need to get the memo.

This dad wasn't the only parent whose kid does a Jekyll and Hyde act depending on which parent they're with. He also wasn't the only dad who had no idea this was even a thing, at least until recently:

"A lot of dads are not aware of this."

"Coming from a mom, it's so unfair. and dads often don't see it so they don't get why we're stressed and overwhelmed at the end of the day"

"More dads need to understand this. this is why they judge moms for being exhausted and wonder why 'nothing' gets done around the house. or why they need a break."

"Thanks for acknowledging. My kids ask me for things 1000x a day and when my husband is alone with them, they don’t need anything, never hungry and play by themselves"

"My children are insanely needy for me, but wildly independent problem solvers with my husband"


gif of man having a breakdownSome kids are like Jekyll and Hyde depending on which parent they're withGiphy

Some parents offered the theory that kids were more likely to act out because they felt safer with mom:

"Kids act out the most whoever they are most comfortable with. They know their feelings and big emotions are safe," one commenter wrote.

The research backs this up. It's the same mechanism at work that causes your kids to behave perfectly at school but raise hell at home. The more comfortable and securely attached they are to you, the more likely they are to be vulnerable and let out their big feelings (and true nature). They may feel more empowered to ask you for or demand help, or generally misbehave. When Mom is the primary caregiver, which is usually the case, it's natural that kids will feel even a little bit safer with her than Dad. That means she gets the short end of the stick when it comes to clinginess and bad behavior.

There are two takeaways here for parents. First, if your kid is well-behaved for everyone including your partner, but a terror for you, it doesn't mean you're doing something wrong! In fact, though it may be little comfort, it probably just means that they feel the safest and most connected to you. Second, remember that your partner isn't being dramatic if they're feeling burnt out by the kid but you're not. Believe them, support them, and for God's sake, be there to give them a break.

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Dad of 2 young kids admits he and his wife sleep separately and the trend is growing

This approach isn't without its drawbacks, though.

rab_moudallal/Instagram

It's not as weird as it sounds.

When you become a parent, your nighttime routine gets thrown for a loop. The first couple of years are a rollercoaster of changes—when the kids go to bed, how often they wake up, how long they sleep. Things start to normal out after a while, but if you have a second kid, or a third, you can start the clock over again each time. Some couples live in nighttime chaos for years and years at a time.

Not only does this naturally cause a ton of sleep disruption and sleep loss in parents of young kids, it can also be a huge source of conflict within a couple. Who gets up with the kids at night? Who gets extra rest in the morning? With two sleep deprived, cranky parents, tempers can flare easily around the subject of rest.

One dad took to social media to come clean about how he handles the restless nights: He and his wife, parents to two young kids, don’t sleep in the same room anymore.

Rabeeh Moudallal, in an Instagram reel, discussed the couple’s “married but separate” sleeping strategy. He says he usually sleeps on a mattress on the floor in their toddler’s room, while his wife, Katie, handles any late night fussiness or feedings with the baby. In their arrangement, both parents don’t have to get woken up every time one of the kids does. It minimizes disruption and sleep loss, and let’s them take turns helping each other out if one of them has a particularly rough stretch. It may not be the most romantic set up in the world, but for this phase of life, it makes a lot of sense!

Watch Moudallal’s full reel here:

I can absolutely relate to what Moudallal is describing here. I have a 4-year-old with significant sleep issues and I’ve spent many long stretches sleeping on the floor in her room every night.

Although my wife and I don't usually sleep separately on purpose, during rough patches with the kids it makes sense to “divide and conquer” sometimes—there’s no reason for both my wife and I to suffer during those disruptive nights, after all! I think it's smart to play to the strengths of each person in the couple. If one partner is good at getting up early or but struggles to go back to sleep after being woken, and you know the other one doesn't mind taking the midnight shift and sleeping in a little later, why not use that to your advantage? Doing everything as a team often just means no one's ever rested and fresh.

gif of woman sleepily waking from a napDisrupted sleep can have a lot of consequences. Giphy

There was a palpable sense of relief in the comments section of the viral video, where dozens of parents were overjoyed to finally admit without shame that they did the same:

"This is legit our same set up ! It's good to see others are in the same boat! Just trying to survive it all"

"When we first done this 7 years ago I was too embarrassed and scared to tell anyone incase people thought it was so wrong, and it would ruin our relationship, but it’s about survival"

"I always say to hubby, we’ve got years to be together, the kids need us at the moment. It won’t be forever"

Studies say about a third of couples don’t sleep in the same room or bed regularly. It’s more common than you think and is nothing to be ashamed of.

This number used to be closer to 25%, but it's growing rapidly.

Couples with different schedules, for example, commonly sleep separately. But so do those who deal with one partner snoring or having restless legs or insomnia. They’re all perfectly valid reasons to sleep separately, which can reduce conflicts and help everyone get more rest. That leads to happier relationships overall, so it's easy to see why the trend is catching on.

Parenting young kids who constantly wake or cry in the middle of the night is as good a reason as any to sleep in different rooms for a while.

But a word of caution for baggy-eyed parents: Sleeping in separate beds for logistical reasons is one thing, but deprioritizing your relationship is another.

It’s easy to think you have all the time in the world for each other once this phase of early parenthood ends, but putting intimacy off for extended periods of time can have lasting consequences. And news flash, there will be another stressful phase of parenting waiting for you after the sleepless nights are over! It’s not going to get easier, just a different kind of hard.

Moudallal even admits this. “I kind of miss being able to roll over and talk to my wife at night instead of just texting her from her room," he says, jokingly calling the separation a "natural contraception."

Couples who are parents need time together, even when chaos with the kids is swirling all around them. It's no secret that raising young kids puts enormous pressures on relationships, and a lot of couples don't survive it. It’s OK to divide and conquer and not find that intimacy by sleeping next to each other, but just make sure you replace it with other ways of connecting instead of always waiting around for smoother sailing.

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