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messy homes

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Mom offers a tour of her 'average middle-class house' and it's just what people needed to see

“Let’s normalize ‘average’ because there is nothing wrong with it."

@steph_murphy/TikTok

Stephanie Murphy shares her "average" home in viral TikTok video.

Sure, it’s lovely to see pristine, perfectly curated homes that look like they belong in Architectural Digest. A little inspo never hurt anyone. But as we all know, the spotless life is simply not an achievable reality, especially for those with busy lives and limited budgets (read: most of us).

But you know what? Maybe even the messy homes deserve some love. The ones with constant junk piles and unfinished projects and dirty dishes and misplaced toys. The homes that will never grace the cover of a magazine but still do a wonderful job of containing all the moments life has to offer—the big, small, extraordinary, mundane, and everywhere in between. 'Cause at the end of the day, isn’t that a home’s true purpose anyway?

Stephanie Murphy, a mom and TikTok creator, seems to think so. Murphy recently took viewers on an “average house tour,” and it was the exact opposite of aspirational.

Highlighted in Murphy’s tour are the pantry door that’s remained unpainted for three years, blinds held together with binder clips, air conditioners held in place by duct tape, a full dish rack tray that’s “a permanent fixture” on their countertops, and not one but two junk drawers (honestly, that’s a little low by my count).

@steph_murphy
Lets normalize “average” because there is nothing wrong with it. Everywhere you look on social media you see big gorgeous houses in perfect condition and its hard not to compare yours to them. But its not the norm and half the time its staged. Our house is lived in, and its filled with love and tons of memories and at the end of the day thats all that matters.
♬ vampire - Olivia Rodrigo

You’ll also notice a fridge that is covered in her kid’s artwork and school pictures. Not in any cohesive way, but merely thrown on randomly, as nature intended.

Meanwhile, in the master bedroom, Murphy and her husband’s bed have two separate blankets because neither of them like to share. A genius idea, and just another example of how we really, really don’t need to continue with marital sleeping norms that don’t actually feel comfortable.

As for why Murphy decided to showcase her “average, middle-class house,” it’s all in the caption of her video:

“Let’s normalize ‘average’ because there is nothing wrong with it. Everywhere you look on social media, you see big gorgeous houses in perfect condition and it’s hard not to compare yours to them. But it’s not the norm and half the time it's staged. Our house is lived in, and it’s filled with love and tons of memories and at the end of the day that's all that matters."

Judging from the comments sections of this now-viral post, it seems like other people are ready for more average content.

“This is awesome!” one person wrote. “I’m constantly feeling inadequate when people have a perfect house that looks like nobody lives there!”

“I feel seen,” added another.

Hear, hear. No need to feel inadequate about having a home that’s lived in. Imperfection has its own kind of beauty.

This article originally appeared two years ago.

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Actress Julia Fox shares a tour of her cluttered NYC apartment, and it's a relatable mess

"Hopefully, somebody watches this and thinks, ‘Well, OK, maybe I’m not doing so bad.’”

@juliafox/TikTok

Julia Fox taking viewers on a tour of her apartment in New York.

To live in a perfectly curated, always tidy, Marie Kondo-worthy home might be a lovely fantasy. But for many, dare I say most of us, that is simply not a reality. There just aren’t enough hours in the day or helpful hands in the house to keep it from getting messy multiple times a week. Square that by a million if the home has small kiddos in it. And if there’s only one parent to clean up after those small kiddos? Forget about it.

That’s why people are letting out a huge sigh of relief after getting a video tour of Julia Fox’s New York apartment in all its glorious disarray.

The actress and model is often seen wearing bold, high-end fashion pieces at glamorous events like the Met Gala but her home is anything but glamorous.

In a three-minute clip posted to her TikTok, Fox first shows off the completely unmade bed in her bedroom, which is technically the living room.

Fox, a single mom, explains that her actual bedroom was converted into a playroom for her son Valentino. The makeshift playroom is filled with a flurry of toys, plus a rogue clothing rack that Fox knows she “really needs to get rid of.”

Stars…they really are just like us.

@juliafox
Come with me on a very underwhelming apartment tour! also to clarify I have only ONE mouse and he’s cute 🥰
♬ original sound - Julia fox

Fox then takes us down a long and very cluttered hallway, through the kitchen filled with shoeboxes (a common sight in New York apartments, apparently), and into Valentino’s actual room, which is by far the cleanest room in the house. Of course, that’s only because Valentino is almost never in there and wants to hang out in mom’s room.

And that’s it. That’s the entire apartment. No frills. Just a small apartment with the charming chaos of parenthood.

“For me personally, I just don’t like excessive displays of wealth, [it] makes me feel icky. Especially people that have really big houses. It’s just really wasteful when there are so many homeless people in this country, and I’m not really like that,” Fox says in her video. “I know I’m gonna get roasted, but hopefully, somebody watches this and thinks, ‘Well, OK, maybe I’m not doing so bad.’”

Clearly, people did watch. The TikTok has racked up 8 million views in only two days, with thousands of viewers sharing how the “underwhelming apartment tour” was a breath of fresh air.

“I am legit flabbergasted that Julia Fox lives just like me. It doesn’t seem right,” commented one person.

“Me and Julia Fox both have wood platform beds with no headboard,” added another.

While Fox was met with some criticism, the overwhelming consensus was praise for both her transparency and down-to-earth parenting style.

“Love how much of your space is dedicated to your son,” applauded one commenter.

Another wrote, “You're a mother that obviously prioritizes your child & it is a beautiful apartment. Love you are showing that success looks different for every person.”

Life can be messy sometimes. That remains true whether you’re a privileged celebrity or just an average person trying to get by. So maybe we can all cut ourselves some slack for letting things pile up from time to time. Odds are, there's still plenty about a home to appreciate, even when it does look like a hurricane ran through it.

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