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A man in Japan rents out his friendship by the hour–no strings attached–and he's making a fortune

"Wanna grab a beer at the bar? He's in."

Photo by Victoriano Izquierdo on Unsplash

A man and woman walk on the road.

His name is Shoji, AKA "The Do Nothing Guy," and if you're in Tokyo and looking for someone to quietly read a book with in a park, he's your guy. That is, if you have an extra hundred to spare.

Sometimes positive innovation is born from serious matters. Recently, many mental health advocates have warned of a loneliness epidemic as people readapted to getting out of a worldwide lockdown. But whether that's your affliction or not, sometimes you just want a buddy by your side while you go to the grocery store–or, better yet, when you're snooping through your husband's phone.

Travel writer Drew Binsky explains how it works. From his YouTube page: "There is a man in Tokyo named Shoji Morimoto, and he makes a full-time living by literally 'doing nothing.' If you pay $100, you can rent him for a few hours, and he will join you around Tokyo to be your companion."

He gives examples. "Want to grab a beer at the bar? He's in. Want to read a book in the park? He's in. Want to relax at home? He's in. Even though this was one of the strangest experiences I've ever had–it's actually a pretty neat concept."

Drew shares a video of trying out the service with the hopes of making Shoji an actual "real friend" by the end of the day. Drew and his friend, a Japanese translator, meet Shoji at the train station and discuss what kind of food he likes. Shoji mostly just nods and follows behind them, which Drew describes as "strange and awkward."

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

As they gobble up some Udon noodles, Drew tries to make small talk, which is translated. They find out that–while it's not an official number–he has about 1,000 clients per year who use his "do nothing" service. It's also confirmed he's the "first guy who started doing this," but there are many others who are attempting to follow his lead.

Interestingly, Shoji is pretty much up for anything, as long as it's not romantic, sexual, or illegal. He describes one woman who broke pieces of paper into rice-sized bites and merely wanted him to watch her "eating the paper." He found this "funny."

After spending some time together, Drew relays that he's starting to get why this is so popular. "In Japan," he says in a voiceover atop a photo of a busy Tokyo street, "There is a term called Hikikomori, which refers to people who withdraw from the world and isolate at home due to loneliness and social anxiety." While renting a friend might seem like a temporary fix to a pretty heavy wound, it certainly seems to help stop the proverbial bleeding. And sometimes it's just fun.

Tokyo, shoji, rent a friend, companions, friendshipRainy Tokyo street at nighttime. Photo by Valentin BEAUVAIS on Unsplash

They continue their day visiting an arcade, McDonald’s, and the post office. At one point, Drew gets a tiny laugh out of Shoji and hopes maybe that's his "in" for real friendship. It's translated that Shoji likes the TV show Desperate Housewives, the movie Back to the Future, and Michael Jackson. Many friendships have been built on way less.

In Drew's summation, the experience was interesting, but he seems disappointed that they couldn't get much out of Shoji. When asked what he thought of the experience, Shoji stayed on-brand and answered, "Nothing," while money was exchanged.

But some in the YouTube comments are frustrated by Drew and feel he missed the point. One person writes, "I feel like the point of him is being missed. He's not there to be an interactive friend. He's there to accompany people in places where being alone can be a stigma, like going to a bar or restaurant you really want to visit but have no friends available to go or you don't feel comfortable going alone for fear of mockery etc. He is meant to offer no judgment, opinion, or even safety – just there to make you look like you have a friend."

Shoji has thoughts on the matter too. Asia Grace writes in a The New York Poststory, "In his 2023 memoir Rental Person Who Does Nothing, Morimoto recalled being hired to watch a woman snoop through her husband’s secret online dating profiles. 'She screamed (like in her DM) every 10 minutes or so,' wrote Morimoto. 'At one stage, she made a mistake with an app, clicking ‘Like’ for a man she wanted to skip through.'"

He makes about $80,000 a year, and this has inspired others to attempt his business model. Grace shares that a 25-year-old in the West Village, Isabella Epstein, also has a similar side hustle. "The genius Gen Z makes dinner reservations at swank NYC hotspots and invites random gals online to join her for a bite."

Sometimes a table of strangers is better than a table of one.

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Mental Health

Adam Grant explains that a simple tweak in how you journal can boost your motivation

"Part of our motivation comes from feeling capable of making a difference."

Photo credit: Canva

Adding contributions to a gratitude journal can help make you happier and more motivated.

Some years ago, the idea of keeping a "gratitude journal" became all the rage. Research indicates that cultivating a sense of gratitude by "counting our blessings" can make us feel happier and more satisfied with our lives, and gratitude journal is a purposeful, systematic way to do that.

Happiness is great, but what about motivation? Does gratitude journaling make you more motivated? According to organizational psychologist Adam Grant, the answer is no. But there is something else you can add to your journal to increase your motivation—contributions.

"If you just do a gratitude journal, you end up passive," Grant told the Last Neanderthals podcast. "You're reflecting on what you're fortunate to receive from others. Jane Dutton and I studied this and we found that people end up more motivated after they do 'contribution journals,' where. you think about what you did for others. Part of our motivation comes from feeling capable of making a difference."

Grant said he likes to keep a journal that includes both gratitude and contributions. "You do your gratitude list, three things I'm grateful for, and then three ways I was useful to other people as well."

As a researcher at The Wharton School at University of Pennsylvania, Grant teamed up with Jane Dutton of the Ross School of Business at the University of Michigan to research how reflecting on giving and receiving impacts pro-social behavior. The question at the heart of their study was whether reflecting on receiving (gratitude) or on giving (contribution) would make a person behave in a more helpful way toward others.

gratitude journal, adam grant, motivation, contributions journalAdam Grant suggests adding contributions to your gratitude journal.Photo credit: Canva

"In field and laboratory experiments, we found that participants who reflected about giving benefits voluntarily contributed more time to their university, and were more likely to donate money to natural-disaster victims, than were participants who reflected about receiving benefits," the authors wrote. "When it comes to reflection, giving may be more powerful than receiving as a driver of prosocial behavior."

In fact, it appears that reflecting on giving becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy of sorts. "Merely thinking about recent experiences of giving encourages people to give more time and money," Grant and Dutton wrote. The more we recall ways we've contributed, the more motivated we are to contribute.

volunteering, giving, motivation, adam grantVolunteering is one way to contribute.Photo credit: Canva

As it turns out, giving is also good for your mental health. According to the Mental Health Foundation, that helping others can reduce stress and improve mood, self-esteem and happiness. It's one of the ways people can build connections, which helps prevent loneliness and isolation, and can increase our sense of optimism and satisfaction.

The Mental Health Foundation shares some suggestions for people wondering how they might contribute more:

- Volunteer for a local community organization
- Offer your expertise and support as a mentor for those who are struggling
- Check-in with a neighbor
- See if there’s anything you can do to support your children’s school or nursery—offer to read stories for example
- Involve your friends and neighbors in community projects
- Offer to skill-share with a friend—you could teach guitar, dance or a new recipe
- Call a friend that you haven’t spoken to for a while
- Tell a family member how much you love and appreciate them
- Offer a listening ear to someone who simply wants to talk

helping in the garden, volunteering, being helpful, contributions journalHelping doesn't have to be complicated or elaborate.Photo credit: Canva

Contributions don't have to be huge or dramatic to be impactful, both to ourselves and others. It's not like you have to find a cure for cancer or solve international conflicts or rescue someone from a burning building to count up ways you helped others or the world. A contributions journal entry could be as simple as, "1) Helped my neighbor plant her garden. 2) Dropped a bag of food at the food bank. 3) Helped my niece with her math homework." Any way that you made someone else's day or life a little easier or better is a contribution, so don't be overly judgey of your own list.

Besides, the more you reflect on giving, according to Grant, the more giving you'll have to reflect on, so just make a start and see what happens.

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Health

Tom Cruise has advice for people with social anxiety, and it's actually pretty great

His words had a "profound impact" on a co-star's life.

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Tom Cruise

Not only can Tom Cruise do his own stunts, he's a good therapist too. His Mission Impossible: Dead Reckoning Part One co-star, Haley Atwell, has revealed that she, like so many of us, struggles with social anxiety. On the Reign with Josh Smith podcast, she discusses how it often overwhelms her and makes her want to retreat.

Tom Cruise, mission impossible, stunt, stunt man, actor, filmTom Cruise Mi GIF by Mission: ImpossibleGiphy

But she was saved by incredibly insightful advice from Tom Cruise, which she imparts to the audience. After describing him as a positive "hair dryer" just blowing his positive energy around, Josh asks, "What's the best pep talk he's given you?" Haley answers, "Social anxiety tends to be something that people talk about a lot at the moment. It seems to be quite a buzzword of conversation."

They both agree that everyone has some version of anxiety, whether it's in a big group of people, a new work environment, or even just around a small group of friends. She confesses, "For me, I start to retreat into myself and overthink. 'Do I look weird? Do I seem awkward?' I'm not speaking, I'm just muffling my words or I need something to numb me from this.'"

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Luckily, Cruise has quite a simple way to combat these feelings. "The pep talk he gave me helps, which is that if you walk into a room and feel the anxieties coming, try doing the opposite. Try to look OUT and look around the room and go, 'Where is it? Where is the thing I have attached to my insecurity?'"

The idea is to pinpoint the place where her (or any of our) anxiety might be rooted. "Is it that person over there who reminds me of my high school bully? Is it that person over there who didn't give me a job once?" Once the source is recognized, if possible, Cruise suggests asking yourself, "Where does it live outside of me, and where do I feel like the source might be coming from?"

Haley emphasizes that examining her fear, which Cruise encourages, truly helps the anxiety subside. She continues, "If I look at it for long enough, the anxiety then can have a name. It can have a label and be contained, instead of free-floating, where I'm just in a total struggle internally with my own anxiety." Seeing through this prism, she shares, "If I’m scared of something, if I keep looking at it long enough, it tends to not be the monster under the bed anymore."


Actress, Hayley Atwell, social anxiety, mental health, actingFile:Hayley Atwell.jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.org

Naming the emotion, whether it's jealousy, loneliness, etc., can help you outwardly address it so that it doesn't fester in your mind. She reiterates Cruise's words: "If you're scared of something, just keep looking at it. Try not to look away, and it will often give you information about how to overcome it."

Cruise's advice isn't all that different from many professional therapists. In the blog post, "How to overcome social anxiety: 8 tips and strategies" (clinically reviewed by Dr. Chris Mosunic, PhD, RD, MBA, for Calm.com,) ideas on how to overcome social anxiety are given and number one on the list could have been written by Cruise himself: "Identify your triggers," they write, explaining, "The first step to managing social anxiety is understanding what sparks it. Triggers can be unique to each person. Some might find large gatherings intimidating, while for others, it might be public speaking. To identify your triggers, keep a journal of your feelings and the situations that make you anxious. Recognizing these triggers is a crucial step in managing your reactions to them."


- YouTubewww.youtube.com

They also suggest, among other ideas, breathing techniques such as the 4-7-8 method: breathing in for 4 seconds, holding for 7, and breathing out for 8. They also advise "challenging negative thought patterns." They explain, "Practice challenging these thoughts. Ask yourself: 'Is this thought based on facts or feelings? What's the best thing that could happen?' Replacing negative thoughts with positive ones can help reduce feelings of anxiety."

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Celebrity

Amanda Seyfried gives a refreshingly honest GRWM, baring her natural skin

“You might be thinking: ‘What’s that on her face?' That’s my eczema."

Elena Ternovaja/Wikipedia, Photo credit: Canva

Amanda Seyfried shows the products she uses to cove up eczema flare-ups.

We all know that celebrities are just as imperfect beneath all the makeup, airbrushing and other various beautifying treatments they have access to. And yet, while we might understand this on an intellectual level, it’s hard not to compare ourselves to the flawless standard that constantly comes across our screens.

That is, until a celebrity actually shows said imperfect skin. Which is the route that A-lister Amanda Seyfried decided to go for her TikTok GRWM (short for Get Ready With Me) for Vogue.

While most celeb GRWMs show already glowing faces marketing buzzy products (often from the celeb’s own skincare brand), Seyfried took a more candid approach by centering it around how she deals with her eczema, and people are loving her for it.

Eczema, also known as atopic or perioral dermatitis, is a chronic inflammatory skin condition characterized by dry, itchy, and red skin. It’s pretty common, with around 10% of the country’s population having it. And while there are treatments that can help manage symptoms and prevent flare-ups, it isn’t curable. So a rash now and then is kind of par for the course.

Photo credit: Canva

In the video below, Seyfried appears to have a bit of a flare-up, and quips ““You might be thinking: ‘What’s that on her face?’”

“That’s my eczema,” she continues, “and I, too, suffer from perioral dermatitis. When I was 19, I started developing the rash, and I learned about a lot of medication products — I learned a lot about just products in general from my dermatologist at the time.”

She then begins her routine, which includes washing her face. “The rash is screaming,” she notes, “But that’s OK, because I’m gonna cover it. I’m using this medicated cream for this little cutie mustache.”

This moment in particular seemed to resonate with viewers. As one person wrote, “‘and the rash is screaming!’ As an eczema girly, FELT THAT.”

Moving on, Seyfried applies her topical medication, followed by a toner, serum, and concealer to cover any red patches. After she’s done, you really can’t detect any skin issues going on.

“You see how easy that was? I don’t need to get rid of all the redness — I wouldn’t even know how to try,” she concludes.


@voguemagazine

In the latest installment of Vogue’s #BeautySecrets, #AmandaSeyfried opens up about her skincare journey including her struggles with #Eczema and the products she uses to cover it. Tap the link in our bio to watch the full episode.


And sure, a lot of folks who also deal with eczema might have gotten some product inspiration, but perhaps more importantly, they got to feel reassured by Seyfried’s unfazed attitude towards it all, even if she can’t completely get rid of it.

All in all, people praised Seyfried for opening up about this struggle. Both those who also have skin challenges, and those who are just a wee bit tired of the overly perfect celebrity image.

“I absolutely love seeing celebrities showing their natural face. It makes people feel included and fights against the super unrealistic beauty standards.”

“As a rosacea girly who constantly wears makeup to hide my red face in shame, this video makes me so happy."

“I have atopic eczema and this is the FIRST TIME I am seeing someone famous talking about it and showing it on the internet. This is a real confidence boost!!!”

“This healed me.”

“From one eczema girly to another, it’s SO refreshing to see someone in the public eye talk openly about their skin condition.”

“Wow! It really goes to show how many products celebrities use. And the internet just continues to fall for such unattainable beauty standards. Glad this video is pulling back the curtain. It’s so important."

People even commended Vogue for ditching its usual glam fanfare, and asked for more of the same.

As one viewer astutely put it, “People are dying for authenticity. Thank you.” Another simply wrote, “Vogue, you COOKED with this.”

So yes, to all the eczema/rosacea/acne/younameit girlies (and boys, and themies)…you are not alone. And when celebrities are willing to break through the illusion of perfection, we can easily remember that we are all human. And we don’t have to feel less than for needing extra concealer or special cream or whatnot. Truly, none of us are perfect.

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