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Woman goes viral for literally steaming from her head due to a hot flash

"This is the realest depiction of a hot flash I’ve seen!"

@mstraceymonique/Instagram

The way she just laughs it off…

Ah, hot flashes. They're the one thing most people know about menopause—but even at that, we don’t really have that much common knowledge about. For instance, did you know that a hot flash can make a woman literally steam from head to toe? Probably not.

And yet, it’s true. The proof? A now viral video showing author and podcaster Tracey Monique sitting in the stands of a football game, eating nachos, and nonchalantly exuding vapors like a fantastical dragon. She even laughs as it’s happening.

“When the flash starts flashin’,” one of her friends can be heard saying behind the camera.

Hot flashes are caused by fluctuating hormone levels, and can feel as though you're suddenly thrust into a sauna. The intense heat can cause sweating, face reddening, and even chills and a rapid heartbeat. In short—it’s not for the faint of heart. And yet, because of the stigma surrounding hot flashes (and menopause in general), so many women are made to feel embarrassed by it or have their symptoms minimized, rather than feeling like badasses for being part of this rather remarkable aspect of the human condition.

This is why the video is resonating with so many people. One, it depicts a rarely seen image of what menopause actually looks like, and two, it helps combat any notion of women being dramatic about symptoms. As a viewer noted, “this is the realest depiction of a hot flash I’ve seen! I’ve saved it so that I can show anyone who even in the very slightest suggests that I’m exaggerating when it happens!”

Another person quipped, “To all husbands out there. When she says she's hot... this is what she means.”

Still another exclaimed, “Finally! Visual evidence of a HOT FLASH!!! Thank you so much for posting this. You have validated millions of women all over the world: menopause symptoms are REAL and they are MISERABLE!”

Similarly, it really shows how little we know about women’s bodies. Like, why does this phenomenon still look so otherworldly and strange in our modern world? More than one viewer commented how if this were the late 1600s, poor Monique would be tried as a witch. And if this one teeny tiny aspect of menopause is still so wildly misunderstood, imagine the rest of it or any other female biological process.

So much of our views on menopause are directly linked with our fears of aging in general. By and large, we see menopause as a disease or marker of inevitable decline, rather than a new chapter of life. Then of course there's the whole tying-a-woman’s-sense-of-self-worth-to-her -ability-to-bear-children thing, which is undoubtedly a prevailing issue. But it’s moments like those that really shift those outdated perspectives, enabling women to feel seen, understood, and hopefully even a little confident in their own strength and resilience.

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Menopause advocate shares 5 big perimenopause symptoms that blindside women in their 40s

OMG the itching.

Photo credit: Canva

Shoulder pain is a symptom of perimenopause?! Yep, can be.

Living in a female body is wild. There's the whole period thing to begin with. Then, for many of us, there's the pregnancy and childbirth thing that pushes your body to its limits. And then there's the menopausal stage where you get to say goodbye to periods forever. Yay!

But between those last two is a phase that has been woefully neglected by clinical research and is only now starting to get the attention it deserves. Perimenopause happens in the years prior to actual menopause. Filled with super special symptoms that seemingly come out of nowhere, perimenopause can make you feel as if you've moved into an entirely different body. Most women experience perimenopause in their 40s, though it can start as early as the mid-30s, and is something all women should be aware of.

Author and former news anchor Tamsen Fadal shared five perimenopause symptoms she wish she'd known about in her 40s on Instagram, and so many women resonated with it.


The symptoms she shared were:

1. Weight gain

It's very strange to suddenly have your baseline weight go up by 10 pounds when you didn't change anything about your diet or exercise routine. It's also strange to suddenly gain weight in parts of your body that you never previously gained weight.

"I suddenly looked in the mirror and didn't recognize my body despite changing nothing about my routine," Fadal wrote.

"I was probably in perimenopause for ten years and just thought I was going crazy. And that I was lazy and the weight gain was all my fault," shared one woman. "If only I’d known."

"Looking at food and gaining weight is not fun 😭," quipped another.

2. Sudden Anxiety

Even women who aren't prone to anxiety can start experiencing anxiety symptoms during perimenopause. And those who already deal with it can find themselves feeling anxious at a whole new level.

"I felt like I was losing my mind and no doctor was giving me a straight answer which made my anxiety through the roof," wrote Fadal.

"The freaking anxiety rocked my world 😢" shared one woman.

"I've always been anxious. What I'm noticing is now it's gotten worse and I'm feeling paranoid, crazy," wrote another.

3. Itchy skin

This one is weird and not something anyone talks about until all of a sudden you and everyone your age talks about wanting to scratch their skin off.

"Not only was my skin SO dry, it felt like I had little electric shocks underneath my skin at the most odd times," Fadal shared.

"The itchy skin is not talked about enough! Sometimes I just can’t stand it, I want to scream!"

"All.of.this!!!👏 add tinnitus, itchy ears and dry eyes to that list 🫠"


4. Irritability

Whether it's a symptom of its own or a side effect of the many other symptoms piling on is a legitimate question, but perimenopause can definitely make you want to bite someone's head off.

"The irritability isn’t something we talk about enough!" Fadal wrote. "It was like one day I woke up and suddenly I was moody over EVERYTHING and my patience was very, very low."

"I can be fine one moment then suddenly I hate everyone and want to go live in the forest by myself. Then that slides into sadness because we're all going to die. It's exhausting."

"Yes, I was very very irritable with most things that no patience whatsoever! My 15 year old son was like 'why are you always so angry?' That was something unusual of me and it was like a “wake up call” in a way that I realized I wasn’t just same and my body was always under fire with sleepless nights!"

5. Joint pain

Fadal shared that she had sudden pain in her shoulder and wasn't able to put her arm around someone for a picture. I went through about a year where I couldn't reach over to turn my bedside lamp on and off.

"The shoulder pain! So true."

"The joint pain! OMG. Started out of nowhere two weeks ago. Cannot lift arms up to get dressed and my hands are excruciating. It’s not a little bit sore… it’s a LOT sore."

"The shoulder pain out of nowhere is insane!!"

Of course, any symptoms that are concerning to you should be checked out by a medical professional and not just be assumed to be perimenopause. But what so many women shared is the same thing Fadal found when she started experiencing perimenopause symptoms—there's just not nearly enough information out there about it. That may seem shocking, considering the fact that women make up half the population and have been going through menopause for literally all of human history, but meaningful research on perimenopause really only began in the 1980s, and there's still so much that's not fully understood.

Fadal has been on a mission to get more and better information out to women about perimenopause and menopause since she had her first anxiety attack and hot flash live on the air in 2019, which left her shaking on the bathroom floor. Her book, "How to Menopause," is coming out in March of 2025 and she has co-created a documentary, "The M Factor," that will air on PBS on October 17, 2024.


Perimenopause feels impossible to prepare for, but knowledge is power and the more we understand about what's happening with our bodies and what we might expect, the more equipped we will feel when our time comes.

You can follow Tamsen Fadal on Instagram for more about menopause and perimenopause.


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People are loving Drew Barrymore's live reaction to her first perimenopause hot flash

“I don’t know that I have ever heard a celebrity talk about a hot flash in the moment. Thank you for being so real."

The Drew Barrymore Show/Youtube

Drew Barrymore getting a quick assist from Jennifer Aniston

It feels safe to say that many, if not most people hail Drew Barrymore as the “Queen of Candid.” She can seemingly talk to absolutely anyone about anything in a way that’s consistently warm and authentic.


That even goes for when she experiences her first hot flash in front of a live television audience, apparently.

While speaking with guests Jennifer Aniston and Adam Sandler on her talk show, Barrymore abruptly appears flustered, fanning herself and removing her jacket.

Without missing a beat, she says, “I am so hot, I think I'm having my first perimenopause hot flashes.”

“Oh, I feel so honored!” Jennifer Aniston quips as she fixes Barrymore’s mic, which is a sweet moment in and of itself.

“I’m so sorry!” Barrymore continues, laughing through it all. “Do you feel this?!” she says, placing Aniston’s hand just below her neck. “Or maybe I’m just excited!”

@drewbarrymore I either had my first perimenopause hot flash or got really exciting! Maybe both? @thedrewbarrymoreshow ♬ original sound - Drew Barrymore

Sandler, then reaching for Barrymore’s palm, assures her, “Yeah you got a hot hand.”

“Well, I’m so glad I have this moment documented!” Barrymore exclaims.

One viewer on TikTok gushed, “I don’t know that I have ever heard a celebrity talk about a hot flash in the moment. Thank you for being so real.”

Another echoed, “Drew, we have a whole generation (X) entering the change. Let’s normalize it. Just wait until you’re soaked with sweat, then cold lol.”

One person commented on the exchange between Aniston and Barrymore, noting how refreshing it was to see two “beautiful, authentic, powerful women my own age to look up to.”

Only a week prior, Barrymore had again been an unofficial spokeswoman for perimenopause when she sat down with Gayle King of “CBS Mornings” to share more of her personal experiences, including having a period “every two weeks.”

"One doctor also just told me this could last, in the worst-case scenario, 10 years. And I was like, ‘I will never make it 10 years like this!’" she told King.

@cbsmornings How did Drew Barrymore know she was in perimenopause? She tells Gayle King and Nikki Battiste one of the main symptoms she experienced. Watch their full conversation tomorrow on #CBSMornings. #drewbarrymore #gayleking #menopause #perimenopause #fertility #health ♬ original sound - CBS Mornings


Considering that every woman who lives past their 40s will probably go through at least some version of this—even earlier, for some—one would think that there should be more conversations about this pivotal life chapter. Maybe then it wouldn’t be so daunting.

Or at the very least, there might be less stigma around it. As Barrymore eloquently put it in her interview, “The way menopause has been branded is, 'You're old, you're done.' That's not it." Instead, she feels that in reality, "more women in their 40s, 50s, and 60s are looking so attractive, feeling so vibrant, living their best lives.”

Imagine that—life getting better as you grow older. What a radical thought.


This article originally appeared on 3.30.23

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Women's Health

Smooth sailing through menopause: natural ways to ease the transition

Natural remedies to navigate menopause comfortably and confidently

Photo by Peter Schulz on Unsplash
a woman standing on a beach holding a frisbee

Life is full of transitions, but few are as challenging to navigate as menopause. This process can cause uncomfortable physical and psychological symptoms such as hot flashes, painful intercourse, and severe vaginal dryness. Thankfully, there are ways to relieve menopausal symptoms. Menopausal hormone therapy (MHT), dietary supplements, and lifestyle changes can help reduce hot flashes, relieve vaginal dryness, and mitigate other menopausal symptoms, allowing you to comfortably transition into the next chapter of your life.

What Is Menopause?

Menopause is a natural process that marks the end of a person’s monthly menstrual periods. This is caused by the loss of ovarian follicular function and reduced production of the hormones estrogen, progesterone, FSH (follicle-stimulating hormone), and testosterone. Doctors typically diagnose menopause if menstruation hasn’t occurred for at least one year.

Hormonal birth control—including birth control pills and hormonal intrauterine devices—causes menstrual cycle changes and can mask symptoms of menopause, making it difficult to detect the start of perimenopause—the period before menopause during which the ovaries produce estrogen at a slower rate.

Who Experiences Menopause?

Menopause affects people with uteruses who are typically occurs between the ages of 45 and 55. Some people experience menopause before the age of 40, which is often referred to as early menopause. Research indicates smoking is one possible cause of premature menopause.

Anything that damages the ovaries or stops the body from producing estrogen (like hysterectomy, ovary removal, radiation therapy, or chemotherapy) will cause symptoms of menopause.

How Long Does Menopause Last?

The duration of perimenopause and menopause varies between individuals. Perimenopause can last between two and eight years.

While most people experience menopausal symptoms for less than 5 years, they can last between 7 and 11 years for some. Genetics and lifestyle factors can influence the length of menopause.

Menopause Symptoms

Menopause symptoms usually start during perimenopause and can impact day-to-day life. Here are some typical symptoms of menopause:

Menstrual Changes

During perimenopause, changes in the frequency and duration of menstrual periods are common. Additionally, some may experience spotting between periods.

Hot Flashes and Night Sweats

Vasomotor symptoms of menopause (VMS), such as hot flashes and night sweats, are also common. Hot flashes are a sudden feeling of heat in the upper body. Red blotches and profuse sweating can occur during hot flashes, and you may experience chills afterward. Low estrogen levels also cause nighttime hot flashes, known as night sweats, which often disrupt sleep.

You can relieve hot flashes by drinking ice-cold water, removing a layer of clothing, and using a fan when you feel a flash coming on.

You can also treat hot flashes by identifying and avoiding triggers such as stress and spicy foods. Medical treatment can help manage severe hot flashes.

Vaginal Dryness

Low estrogen levels during menopause can cause vaginal dryness, resulting in discomfort, itching, and burning. Vaginal dryness can also cause small tears in thinner vaginal tissues, causing pain during sex.

You can treat vaginal dryness with an over-the-counter vaginal moisturizer. Estrogen therapy in the form of low-dose vaginal preparations is also an effective treatment for many. Additionally, using a water-based lubricant can help prevent pain during intercourse.

If you prefer natural remedies over vaginal moisturizers, low-dose vaginal products, and other medicines, then herbal supplements—like sea buckthorn oil—and vitamins D and E may be helpful.

Mood Changes

Mood swings can make you feel irritable one minute and teary the next. Getting enough sleep, staying active, and reducing stress can help mitigate mood changes and enhance your overall well-being.

Depression and Anxiety

Menopausal symptoms and hormonal changes can cause depression and anxiety. Adequate sleep, a healthy diet, and regular physical activity can reduce the symptoms of depression and anxiety. Talk with your healthcare provider if you experience severe depression during menopause, as this may require therapy, medication, or both.

Urinary Incontinence

Decreased estrogen levels can weaken the pelvic floor muscles and urethra, making it hard to hold in urine long enough to get to a bathroom; this is known as urinary urge incontinence. Some individuals also experience urinary stress incontinence, whereby sneezing, laughing, or coughing can cause a leak of urine.

Physical therapy, maintaining a healthy weight, and doing Kegel exercises can help with these urinary symptoms. Products like incontinence pads, pessaries, and urethra caps can help contain urine leaks.

Brain Fog

Problems with focus and memory affect about two-thirds of menopausal individuals. Simple practices—like getting enough sleep, eating a balanced diet, staying socially active, and engaging in mentally challenging activities—can reduce brain fog.

How To Treat Menopause Symptoms

Menopause treatment options—such as menopausal hormone therapy and vaginal estrogen—can help relieve hot flashes, vaginal dryness, and other symptoms associated with menopause.

Hormone Replacement Therapy

Hormone replacement therapy (HRT), also known as menopausal hormone therapy (MHT) or estrogen therapy, can alleviate hot flashes, painful intercourse, and other menopause symptoms by using bioidentical hormones to replenish estrogen levels.

Progesterone hormone therapy may also be needed to protect the womb lining from the effects of estrogen hormone therapy. Taking progesterone and estrogen together is known as combined hormone therapy.

Different menopausal hormone therapy mediums include:

  • Skin patches
  • Tablets
  • Implants
  • Topical gels and sprays.

If you have a low sex drive that persists after systemic hormone therapy, your healthcare provider may recommend testosterone.

Benefits of Menopausal Hormone Therapy

While the effects of hormone therapy vary depending on individual factors, hormone replacement therapy is considered one of the most effective ways to treat menopausal symptoms and reduce the risk of conditions associated with menopause including osteoporosis, liver disease, uterine cancer, and heart disease.

Health Risks of Hormone Therapy

Menopausal hormone therapy is considered safe for most women, but that doesn't mean it’s without possible health risks—especially for those with pre-existing conditions or a family history of blood clots, cancer, and cardiovascular disease. Menopausal hormone therapy may not be safe for some and should be discussed with your healthcare provider if you have a family or personal medical history of any of the following:

  • Blood clots
  • Stroke
  • Heart disease
  • Heart disease risk factors (e.g., high cholesterol and high blood pressure)
  • Breast cancer
  • Gallbladder disease

Those undergoing menopausal hormone therapy may experience side effects including:

  • Nausea
  • Breast tenderness
  • Headaches
  • Hair loss
  • Bone loss
  • Diarrhea
  • Leg cramps
  • Depression
  • Acne
  • Vaginal bleeding or spotting
  • Increased risk of blood clots and breast cancer

Non-Hormone Menopause Treatment

Alternative therapies like non-hormone treatments can help ease the symptoms of menopause if you decide against hormone therapy. Antidepressant medications, such as selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs), can help manage depression and anxiety resulting from menopause. Clonidine, a blood pressure medicine, and gabapentin, an epilepsy medication are known to help with the vasomotor symptoms of menopause. Cognitive behavioral therapy can help with anxiety and low mood resulting from menopause.

Lifestyle Changes

On their own or in combination with hormone therapy, these lifestyle changes can make a huge difference in managing symptoms of menopause.

  • Stop smoking
  • Reduce alcohol and caffeine consumption
  • Eat a balanced diet
  • Exercise regularly
  • Engage in enjoyable activities to boost your mood
  • Maintain a healthy weight
  • Seek support from loved ones

Complications From Menopause

Decreased estrogen levels can result in long-term complications from menopause.

Osteoporosis

Osteoporosis is characterized by bone loss and decreased bone density, which is caused by a lack of estrogen.

Hormone therapy may help protect against menopausal bone loss. For those who can’t undergo hormone therapy, other approaches to decrease osteoporosis risk are encouraged (e.g., staying active, taking calcium supplements, and quitting smoking).

Antiresorptive medications—like bisphosphonates—reduce the breakdown and absorption of bone tissue and can be used to treat osteoporosis in postmenopausal individuals.

Cardiovascular Disease

The decline in estrogen during menopause increases the risk of developing cardiovascular disease. The rates of coronary heart disease are three times higher in menopausal women. To mitigate this risk, those experiencing menopause are advised to maintain a healthy and balanced diet and exercise regularly.

Conclusion

A decrease in estrogen levels during menopause can result in a wide range of physical, mental, and emotional changes in the body. Hot flashes, vaginal discomfort, mood swings, incontinence, and other symptoms can significantly impact daily life. However, there are ways to manage menopause symptoms. Hormone therapy has proved successful in treating symptoms by replenishing estrogen and progesterone levels. For those who are unable to receive hormone therapy for any reason, lifestyle changes, non-hormone treatments, dietary supplements, and other treatments can help alleviate symptoms. Discuss potential therapy and treatment plans with your healthcare provider so you can sail through menopause smoothly.

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