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Women gives tour of "postpartum hotel" in China where new moms get pampered for 30 days

It's not exactly cheap, but it goes to show what's possible with better maternity leave.

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Maternity leave or maternity miracle?

Much has been written about maternity leave in the United States and how it compares to other parts of the world. Unsurprisingly, it usually doesn't compare well. An analysis done by Yahoo! Finance does not have the US cracking the top 25 countries with the best maternity leave policies. The only thing new moms are guaranteed nationwide here is 12 weeks of unpaid leave. Awesome.

We know that many countries have it a lot better than us, but it's sometimes hard to visualize what that looks like. More paid time off sounds great, but how does that really impact those crucial first days after baby is born?

A recent video showcasing what maternity leave looks like for some women in China is blowing people's minds.

gif of a woman getting a facialCould maternity leave be a spa experience? For some women in China, the answer is yes.Giphy

Aileen Wang took viewers along with her as she went to visit a coworker who had just had a baby. The woman was staying at a postpartum center, described as part hospital, part luxury hotel.

"In China we have six months of paid maternity leave and have a tradition called ... kind of like a cozy VIP jail for new moms," she writes in the video caption.

Wang is referring to a a tradition called "zuo yue zi," or "sitting the month." Traditionally, new moms in China are under strict watch by family members not to leave the house or over-exert themselves, to stay warm and eat certain foods in order to recover while family members pitch in with care and help with the baby.

"For the first month after birth, moms can't go out, they are forced to stay at home or in postpartum centers. No cold food and drink, staying warm, and eating nutritious food."

Wang adds that at her friend's cushy recovery center, she gets round-the-clock care for the baby and herself, meals delivered to the room, yoga sessions, massages, and more. For 30-40 days mom has to worry about very little except recuperating her physical, mental, and emotional strength. In the video you even see a staff member at the center bringing in an extraordinary-looking meal on a tray for the new mom!

"In China, there's a say. It basically means: Don't mess with a woman during her first month after giving birth—she won't forget it for whole life!"

Watch the fascinating tour here:


@aileenw1113

In China, we get six months of paid maternity leave and have a tradition called "sitting the month"—kind of like a cozy VIP jail for new moms. #china #maternityleave#givebirth #baby #postpartum

The facility looks and sounds incredible. So does the idea of giving new moms several weeks of pampering to get back on their feet after the trauma of delivery.

Of course, this luxury doesn't come free, or even cheap in China. A month-long stay can cost families somewhere around the equivalent of $10,000 or more. But over the last decade, the number of centers like this one has grown from 550 to well over 4000, showing that the idea is gaining popularity and accessibility.

"The million-plus people who watched Wang's video on TikTok were stunned:6 MONTHS PAID AND 24/7 CARE?!? Please someone tell me why we're brainwashed into thinking the USA is the greatest country ever? Women's health is trash here!"

"America: oh you’ll be fine in 6 weeks."

"This must help a lot with post partum depression. All women need this kind of support"

"And they sent me home alone in a blizzard 4 days after a c section. It was literally 37 degrees below zero."

Even if moms can't afford to stay in a fancy postpartum center like the one shown above, many still observe "sitting the month" at home. With six months of paid leave, new mothers have plenty of time to recover and bond with their baby while other members of the family pitch in with all the heavy lifting. It's an attractive idea that really calls into question what could be possible in the US with better support for moms.


gif of woman wearing two breast pumps saying, "Welcome to motherhood."Imagine how much better of women would be if motherhood started off like this. Giphy

Six weeks of unpaid time off doesn't give families a lot of money or flexibility to work with during maternity leave. Some companies will offer a small amount of paid leave on their own, and some states have mandatory paid leave, but it's not required everywhere. Postpartum centers are becoming more popular in the United States, too, but the concept doesn't align well with the realities of being a working parent. Not yet, anyways. It's fun to envision a future where new families have more time and money to make sure mom's OK before sending her back into the rigors of daily life.

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American mom living in Germany lists postpartum support and women are gobsmacked

“Every video you make gets me closer to actually moving to Germany.”

Aly TikTok Screenshots

U.S. mom living in Germany shares postpartum support she received.

Having a baby is not an easy feat no matter which way they come out. The pregnant person is either laboring for hours and then pushing for what feels like even more hours, or they're getting cut from hip to hip to bring about their bundle of joy. (Unless you're one of those lucky—or rather not-so-lucky—folks who get to labor for hours only to still end up in surgery.)

Giving birth is hard and healing afterward can feel dang near impossible, especially given that most states in the U.S. only offer six weeks of maternity leave and it's typically unpaid. But did you know that not everyone has that experience?

A mom who had her first child in the U.S. before meeting her current husband and relocating to Germany is shedding light on postpartum care in her new country. The stark contrast is beyond shocking to women living in the U.S. and she's got a few considering crossing the ocean for a better quality of life.

Aly, whose TikTok username is @usa.mom.in.germany, took to the platform to explain the resources provided to postpartum moms provided completely free. "Daily in-home visits with a nurse-midwife to check on me and the baby, up to three years parental leave while my job is protected, mental health therapy appointments every other week," Aly recounted.

Wow. Just those few things are beyond impressive, especially given that they're free, but she wasn't done. The list seemed neverending and people who live in the U.S. had some feelings about it.

“Every video you make gets me closer to actually moving to Germany,” one woman said.

Another wrote, "Why did this make me sob. It feels like I was robbed of the early years living with my babies in the US."

"Sobbing as I'm currently pregnant with my second, and I need a break to love my kids the way they deserve," one mom shared.

Honestly, I relate. My third child spent the first six months of his life in an airplane hangar because I had to return to work, still swollen from my c-section, and my husband was out of paternity leave. We had to work opposite shifts to make it work and the hour overlap meant my son got to watch F-15s take off wearing noise-canceling earphones much too big for his tiny baby head. Not the ideal situation, but who knew there was another way?

Germany, apparently. They seem to have some things figured out over there. See for yourself below:

@usa.mom.in.germany

Postpartum Resources as a U.S. American 🇺🇸 in Germany 🇩🇪 In the wake of the news of Lindsay Clancy, it becomes overwhelmingly obvious how many of these resources are unavailable in the USA. We need so much more for postpartum mothers. #livingingermany #germanyvsusa #postpartum #lindsayclansy

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A U.K. insurance company is now giving new grandparents one week of paid leave

via Pexels

A grandmother holding her newborn grandchild.

Most grandparents play an important role in helping their families when their children welcome a new child into the world.

Grandparents can be called on to watch over the family’s older children while their parents care for the newborn in the hospital. They also may have to run errands, take care of pets or stop by the house and watch the newborn so the new parents can get some much-needed rest.

For many grandparents, this involves traveling across the country and taking time off work to support their growing families. Becoming a new grandparent means taking on a whole host of responsibilities. However, we never hear about grandparents getting paid leave to help their families.

Saga, a U.K. travel and insurance company for the over-50s, is showing support for the grandparents who work at their company by offering a week of paid leave to celebrate the birth of a grandchild.

“This is about helping new grandparents celebrate a special moment and play a role in growing families from day one,” said Jane Storm, the chief people officer at Saga. “It is also a symbol of how important older workers are to their companies and society.

“Our customers are mostly over 50 and we want to have more colleagues here that reflect the community we serve,” Storm continued. “We also think this idea should be a key attraction for retention and recruitment.”

In addition to getting a week off, all grandparents will have access to the company’s onsite nursery in Folkestone, Kent. While the new company policy is a wonderful gesture for their older employees, for some, having time off for their grandchildren is a practical concern.

In the U.K. about 40% of grandparents aged over 50 provide regular childcare for their grandchildren.

“Embracing family-friendly working practices makes business sense,” said Justine Roberts, the founder of the online community Gransnet. “Employers who recognize the fact that their employees have relationships and responsibilities outside of work will reap the rewards of increased loyalty and staff wellbeing.”

Americans have to be shaking their heads at how far Europeans have progressed when it comes to paid family leave. The U.S. has no federal law granting paid family leave. In fact, in the U.S. only 21% of workers have access to paid family leave through their employers.

In the U.K., Statutory Maternity Leave grants new mothers up to 39 weeks of paid leave. For the first six weeks, they are paid 90% of their average weekly earnings. And for the next 33, they are eligible for £151.97 ($204) a week or 90% of their average weekly earnings, whichever amount is lower.

Four weeks of paid leave were added to the Biden Administration’s Build Back Better bill in early November. However, the bill’s fate is now in jeopardy after losing the tie-breaking vote of Democratic West Virginia senator Joe Manchin. Manchin said that he wouldn’t vote for the Build Back Better bill last Sunday on Fox News citing inflation worries.

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New Zealand is giving bereavement leave from work to women who have miscarriages

via Pexels

A miscarriage can be an incredibly traumatizing event for a woman, but because they are relatively common, they aren't treated as seriously as they should be. According to the CDC, about 17% of American pregnancies end in miscarriage.

"Because it is medically common, the impact of miscarriage is often underestimated," Janet Jaffe, PhD, a clinical psychologist at the Center for Reproductive Psychology in San Diego said according to the American Psychological Association.

"But miscarriage is a traumatic loss, not only of the pregnancy but of a woman's sense of self and her hopes and dreams of the future. She has lost her 'reproductive story,' and it needs to be grieved," she continued.

A study from Britain found that about 15% of women who miscarry experience significant depression and/or anxiety for up to three years after the event.

However, the experience is treated by most as a routine health issue, forgetting the incredible emotional trauma that can come with a miscarriage. The loss of a potential child strikes at the very heart of what it means to be human. To simply pass it off as a routine medical event is extremely callous.

A new law recently passed in New Zealand aims to provide time to heal for those intimately affected by miscarriage.

New Zealand's parliament passed a new bill that gives women, their partners, and parents planning to have a child through adoption or surrogacy, three days of paid leave after a pregnancy loss. India is the only other country with such a law. It gives women six weeks of paid leave after a miscarriage or medical termination.

In the U.S., Reddit is the only employer that offers time off for a miscarriage. The tech company offers eight and a half weeks of fully paid leave for anyone who goes through a pregnancy loss — father or mother.

"The passing of this bill shows that once again New Zealand is leading the way for progressive and compassionate legislation, becoming only the second country in the world to provide leave for miscarriage and stillbirth," Ginny Andersen, the MP in charge of the bill, said in a statement.

"The bill will give women and their partners time to come to terms with their loss without having to tap into sick leave. Because their grief is not a sickness, it is a loss. And loss takes time."

During a 2018 interview with The Guardian, Andersen explained that miscarriages are a taboo subject in New Zealand and shouldn't be the reason for conflict between employee and employer.

"The lack of clarity has meant some women have been in the position of having to argue with their employer about whether they are entitled to leave because they have lost their unborn child," Andersen said. "A lot of women have had more than one miscarriage and it can be very traumatic and difficult if you are trying to hold down a job."

Let's hope that New Zealand's new law calls much-needed attention to the grief that parents experience after a miscarriage and inspires world leaders will take necessary steps to create an environment where parents can heal after such personal trauma.

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