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life advice

Tom Hanks speaking to a crowd in London in 2023.

Tom Hanks, 68, has had an incredible career as an actor, playing lead roles in iconic films such as Forest Gump, Philadelphia, Apollo 13, Saving Private Ryan, and Sleepless in Seattle. He also has remarkable longevity in the business, having been on the A-list for the last 40-plus years. He picked up one of the secrets to his success at age 21 when a frustrated director shared some practical wisdom he'd never forget.

Hanks shared his advice on June 15, 2023, during “An Evening with Tom Hanks,” in London, hosted by fellow actor Richard E. Grant (Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker, Bram Stoker’s Dracula, Gosford Park). As a young man, Hanks worked for a repertory theater, doing background roles and working as an understudy on Shakespeare’s Taming of the Shew, when the lead actors came to rehearsal hungover and didn’t know their lines. This angered the director, who demanded they come to work like professionals.

What's the best advice Tom Hanks ever received?

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

“This is my job, and it's your job here. And I can't tell you guys what to do every time. Stop asking me where you should be. Stop asking what the motivation is. That's your job,” Hanks recalled the director saying before delivering advice that would change his life: “You gotta show up on time. You have to know the text, and you have to have an idea.”

The best advice Tom Hanks ever received: “You gotta show up on time. You have to know the text, and you have to have an idea.”

The advice changed how Hanks approached being a professional actor and helped propel him to the industry's top. The strange thing for Hanks is that it’s advice that many actors still need to hear. “You tell me, are there not a ton of actors that are working who don't do any of those things? And they still get to come and get paid to do it?” he told Grant.

tom hanks elvis, tom hanks australia, tom parker, hanks advice, tom hanks roles, how to act, directorsTom Hanks at the "Elvis" premiere in Australia. via Eva Rinaldi/Wikimedia Commons

Hanks elaborated on the three pieces of advice, adding that showing up on time means “a little bit early,” and knowing the texts means understanding "what’s going on” and being prepared. Finally, " having an idea” means bringing something to the table that will “move it a little further down the line.”

When you boil all of Hank’s advice down to its core, it means to take the initiative. Show up early, be prepared for what you must do, and then improve upon the situation by bringing some fresh ideas to share. From the director’s perspective, it’s invaluable to work with actors who want to enhance their vision so they don't have to control every aspect of the production.


Whether it’s a director, your boss, or your spouse, there’s nothing people love more than being able to depend on those who care enough to go the extra mile so that the project is a success. Show that you’re more than just an actor looking for fame, an employee looking for a paycheck, or a spouse who wants little more than to keep a roof over their head.

Hanks’ advice is great for anyone who wants to go above and beyond and become an integral part of a team. As actor Steve Martin once said, “Be so good that you’re undeniable.” It’s no wonder that Hanks has had such a great career. He took the director's advice to heart and became one of the most successful and beloved actors of all time.

Joy

19 brutally honest pieces of advice that 'everyone should know'

"When someone shows you who they are believe them."

A woman coming to grips with a harsh truth about life.

Life is filled with lessons; unfortunately, there are some we must learn the hard way, whether it’s how the real world works when you start your career or the first time someone breaks your heart. These lessons are essential to learn so that you don’t have to go through the same pain again, but don’t you wish you learned them the easy way — by hearing the harsh truth from others — rather than going through the pain yourself?

Wouldn’t it be great if you could download all of these harsh truths into your brain to learn them the easy way? Some folks online got together and did just that. And, for those who pay attention, it can save them a lot of grief in the future. Many touched upon the thornier issues in life, love, family, friendships, the transitory nature of relationships, and how you can do everything right and still lose.


We chose the top 19 “brutally honest” pieces of advice that were the most important so you don’t have to learn them the tough way.

1. Take care of yourself

"If you have poor hygiene, you will be treated poorly."

"People can and will judge by appearances, so don’t make it any easier for them to do so."

2. Don't ever expect the world to be fair.

"But work to make the parts of the world you influence as fair as possible."

"The concept of fairness is a human invention, which implies that fairness only exists in reality when humans put it there. That's the only way it exists. Do your part."

3. Your job doesn't care about you

"Your company doesn’t give a sh*t about you. If you die, your job will be posted within the week to replace you. You might get a bouquet of flowers on the break room table, but once those die, so will your presence at the job."

"A coworker of mine passed away from cancer a few years back. I think about her sometimes, though we never worked closely, but they sent out an email, and that was that."



4. No one has to forgive you

"Just because you apologize to someone doesn't mean they have to forgive and forget what you did to them."

"The reverse is also true, you don't have to forgive someone just because they apologized to you."

Even though we are conditioned to say "it's okay" when someone apologizes to us, we don't have to condone their actions. Karina Schumann, a psychology professor who studies conflict resolution, apologies, and forgiveness at the University of Pittsburgh, says we only owe them a genuine response. “It’s important to be genuine without being hostile,” says Schumann. “Research shows that using a ‘constructive voice’ — where you voice your concerns in a positive, calm way — is the most effective way to invite behavioral changes and better relationships. Sweeping things under the rug and pretending to forgive when you’re not ready is not going to fix the problem.”

5. 'Brutal opinions aren't always true

"People who describe themselves as brutally honest are usually more interested in the brutality than the honesty."

6. Not all friends are forever

"Friends come and go and some were never really friends."

"And some that ran their course years later start again and it’s like a totally new relationship since you’re in a completely different phase of your life!"

"Can I add that just because you may have had good times with people, that does not make them good friends."



7. Some people shouldn't have kids

"People who are dumb, trashy, or otherwise not great will lack the critical thinking skills to realize they won’t be great parents, or maybe that they won’t have the money to raise a child well. People who are smarter, or have better jobs and lives, will be more likely to not have kids so they can preserve their good life, or will maybe think “maybe I won’t be a good parent” and will not have kids, these people are infinitely better equipped to have kids. This means that a majority of people having kids will not raise them well, a majority of kids will be raised poorly, and a majority of kids will display the same poor personality traits as their parents."

8. No one else’s life revolves around you

"Yep, we all suffer from Main Character Syndrome, but we’re all just extras in someone else’s world."

9. When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time

"I kind of guess it means. Don’t let yourself be fooled and do not gaslight yourself. Don’t excuse bad behavior; say sorry that’s not acceptable, and I’m no longer going to tolerate it. Bye bye, Felicia."

This quote is believed to have been first written by writer Maya Angelou, and Orpah Winfrey would later expand on it to share how it applies to our daily lives. "Remember this because it will happen many times in your life," Winfrey said. "When people show you who they are the first time believe them. Not the 29th. time. When a man doesn't call you back the first time, when you are mistreated the first time, when someone shows you a lack of integrity or dishonesty the first time, know that this will be followed many, many other times, and that will some point in life come back to haunt or hurt you. Live your life in truth. Don't pretend to be someone you're not. You will survive anything if you live your life from the point of view of truth.”



10. Sometimes you lose

"'It is possible to commit no mistakes and still lose. That is not a weakness. That is life.' Jean-Luc Picard."

"Another from sports: The best team doesn't always win; the team that plays the best does."

11. Some bridges are worth burning

"Don't hang on to toxic people, INCLUDING FAMILY. Don't fall for the 'But they are your family...'"

12. If it’s not yes, it’s a no

"Particularly helpful dating advice."

"If they like you, you’ll know it. If they don’t, you’ll feel confused."

"Also add, stop saying no when you mean yes. People can’t read minds."



13. Learn to deal with yourself

"The person who you spend the most time with is yourself. Literally, 24/7 til you die. Learn to deal/exist with that person."

"If you can’t like yourself, why would anyone else? Instead of complaining that no one likes you, work on making yourself into someone likable."

14. Use protection

"Wear a condom. Especially if she tells you you don’t have to and you don’t know her very well."

"In general, when anyone tells you that you don't need something that is for your protection/safety/peace-of-mind, YOU NEED IT."

15. Simple isn't always right

"We live in a complex world, and you should be wary of simplistic explanations."



16. Don't be afraid to fail

"Doing nothing is often worse then doing something wrong. Go make mistakes. Live your life and collect memories and wisdom. If you are in the box. Be there cause you chose to, not because someone told you to be there."

17. Maybe you just don't want it

"If you keep making excuses as to why you aren’t meeting some goal, maybe you just don’t actually want to achieve said goal. And if you just accept this, then you can spend your time focusing on a goal you actually want to achieve."

"You make time for the things you care about and excuses for the things you don't."

18. Be wary of critics

"Only accept criticism from someone you’d take advice from."

"And only take advice from someone successful in the topic at hand."

19. Be pleasant

"Once you reach adulthood, being an a**hole is going to close a lot of doors for you: at school, at work, with friends, and with family. Some of those doors don’t open again. Adults don’t go out of their way to help unpleasant people."

"Similarly, way too many people focus entirely on 'I don't owe anyone anything' and don't focus enough on common courtesy and basic respect. If you refuse to ever help someone else unless you're strictly obligated to, don't be surprised when nobody opts to help you when you need it."

Arjun Mahadevan's life pro tip Twitter thread

Arjun Mahadevan gave the world a gift when he crowdsourced the best “life pro tips” from nearly 22 million people. He shared the top 20 in a Twitter thread that’s got over 619,000 views. Mahadevan sourced the tips from the Life Pro Tips subforum on Reddit, which has been running since 2010.

Mahadevan is the CEO of doolaHQ which he calls the “business-in-a-box” for LLCs.

Mahadevan labeled his advice “20 life tips you wish you knew when you were 20,” but they are helpful for everyone regardless of age. They’re useful for anyone who is in a relationship, has a job, or wants to stay sane in an aggravating world.


Many ideas involve reframing how we judge others to see them with more compassion. Mahadevan also has some advice for professionals to prevent them from making embarrassing mistakes or wasting other people’s time.

Sometimes the simplest change in behavior or perspective can drastically affect our lives. Here are Arjun Mahadevan’s 20 life tips you wish you knew when you were 20:

1. "If you’re stuck on an annoying call, put your phone on airplane mode instead of just hanging up. The other person will see 'call failed' instead of 'call ended.'"

2. "When you sign up for anything online, put the website’s name as your middle name. That way when you receive spam/advert emails, you will know who sold your info."

3. "Always tell a child who is wearing a helmet how cool you think their helmet is. It will encourage them to always wear it in the future."

4. "When you don't have all the facts, try to give people the most generous reason you can for their behavior. Annoyingly slow driver? Maybe it's a mom with a birthday cake in the back. This mindset will gradually make you less reactive and more compassionate."

5. "Do not try to be the man your father would want you to be. Be the man you would like your son to be. It more clearly defines your own convictions, desires, goals and motivates you to be your best."

6. "When a friend is upset, ask them one simple question before saying anything else: 'Do you want to talk about it or do you want to be distracted from it?'"

7. "After a bad breakup, do 10 things that your ex would never do with you. You'll feel better and realize how much of yourself was being held back."

8. "Before you give your child a unique name, try it out first. Use it on food orders, reservations, appointments where applicable, etc. It’ll give you a glimpse of what they’ll deal with when they’re older and could prevent future issues."

9. "If you need to cancel a hotel reservation but are unable to because of a 24-hour policy, call the company and move your reservation to a later date. Call back within a few days and cancel for no charge."

10. "If you tell someone you need to talk to them, for the love of God give some indication of what you need to talk about, or at least that it's not bad news."

11. "Never send a work email when you’re emotionally compromised. Type it up, save it as a draft, and walk away. Ideally, sleep on it. You’ll make a smarter choice when you're not heated."

12. "Don't just let kids win at games. You can slow it down, you can teach them strategy, but keep it real. Someday, they will beat you fair and square, and it will be a moment they always remember with pride."

13. "When cooking things on aluminum foil, first scrunch the foil up, then lay it loosely flat again out on your baking tray. The juices will stay put—and the food will not stick to the foil half as much, if at all."

14. "If you think of a good idea, write it down. Your brain will try to trick you into thinking you will remember it later, but it's a liar! Therefore: Write it down!"

15. "It takes 4 minutes a day and almost no cost to maintain dental hygiene. It takes a lifetime and a lot of money to correct it. 2-minute brush and mouthwash in the AM, 2-minute brush and floss in the PM."

16. "Don’t wait until you have 'time' to start a fitness program. Because then when you get busy again, you’ll stop. The best time to start is actually when you’re busy. Learning how to fit it in when times are tough means you’ll stick with it over the long haul."

17. "When using text messages or IMs for business, say everything you need to say in the first message. Don’t just say 'hi' or 'hey' or 'are you there' or 'are you busy.'"

18. "Instead of feeling that you've blown the day and thinking, 'I'll get back on track tomorrow, think of each day as a set of four quarters:

• Morning• Midday• Afternoon• Evening

If you blow one quarter, you get back on track for the next quarter."

19. "Many problems in marriage are really just problems with being a bad roommate. Learn how to be a good roommate, and it will solve many of the main issues that plague marriages. This includes communicating about something bothering you before you get too angry."

20. "Ask yourself 'what does it matter to me' the next time you find yourself judging someone for their clothing or hobbies. The more you train yourself to not care about the personal preferences of other people, the more relaxed and nicer you become as a person."

This article originally appeared last year.

People spill 10 weird life hacks that actually work

People give advice on all kinds of things whether you asked for it or not. Sometimes the advice you receive is solid, well thought out helpful advice that comes from years of experience. Other times the advice makes little sense or was simply unsolicited and unhelpful. Then there's the kind that seems nonsensical but you try it anyway because you've reached a level of desperation you'd rather not share and much to your surprise, it works.

But wouldn't it be fabulous if you didn't have to reach the brink of desperation to know if some of ridiculous sounding advice actually worked? There are certainly going to be instances where it doesn't matter how well other people proclaim a thing works, not everyone will want to try it. But there are times when the advice feels so outlandish or cliché that you have to share it with others when it works as promised.

There's a plethora of seemingly ridiculous advice out there that actually does work...or at least some people swear it does. Here are 10 pieces of weird advice that may make you scratch your head but supposedly work.

Sleepy Go To Sleep GIF by Simian RefluxGiphy

1. Did you try turning it off and back on again?

It doesn't matter if it's your smart TV or your toddler, there's nothing quite as effective as turning the thing off and on. Feeling a little grumpy, take a nap. It's the human equivalent to unplugging something and plugging it back in or turning it off and on. Someone shares the time tested tip saying, "turn it off and on again. There is a reason that this works in a lot of cases, it's not just bullsh*t advice."

2. Using household items to solve problems works

You probably remember hearing as a kid using peanut better or an ice cube gets gum out of someone's hair. There are all sorts of little tricks to solve everyday problems with things you already have handy, like if your kid puts a bunch of oil in their hair–pretend they're a baby duck and whip out the Dawn dish soap. But there's more, one person explains, "Ketchup cleans brass. Melting a crayon into rusted threads gets the bolt out easily," before someone else chimes in, "and pepsi cleans everything, so long as you don't leave it in so long it melts."

Cheese Pam GIFGiphy

3. "Say cheese"

There's a reason customer service people sound so cheerful and it's not always because they love their job. The customer service representatives that make you feel like they're having a great day when you're calling about an error in your billing, they may just be hiding a secret–it's not cheese. Someone relays, "Smile when talking on the phone to someone. It can actually make you sound more friendly and approachable. The person you are speaking to should sense this and may respond to you better."

People confirm the validity of this advice with one saying, "Tried this in a couple of Interview phone calls and I can attest to it, IT WORKS," while someone else writes "If affects your own mood too and will often genuinely make you feel chirpier."

"Smile, even when you don’t feel like it. It sounds so fake, right? But the weird thing is, even forcing yourself to smile can actually trick your brain into feeling a little happier or more positive. It’s not a cure for everything, but it can definitely help shift your mood, even if it’s just for a moment," another chimes in. Pretty sure there's a song about it by Nat King Cole, too so there must be something to this smiling thing.

Ice Fridge GIF by MillionsGiphy

4. Keys go in the refrigerator

Yes, keys go in the refrigerator not on the key hook...well that's if you don't want to forget your lunch according to one advice giver, "put your keys in the fridge with your leftovers when you're heading out. Haven't forgotten my lunch at home since starting this weird habit five years ago." Now that's a nifty little trick that your stomach may thank you for later.

5. You don't have to hang upside down to cure hiccups

A couple of the most common cures to hiccups is to hold your breath or hang upside down but there may be an easier more interesting way. While people have sworn by placing a piece of paper on your head as a cure for the annoying body glitch, someone shares a hack that works every time saying, "Got the hiccups? Drink water from the opposite side of the glass. Lean forward and drink upside down. Looks absolutely ridiculous but has worked for me every single time since my college roommate taught me this trick." Another person backs them up, "Can confirm. I’ve been doing this for years! Always take a lungs filling deep breath and hold it before looking ridiculous."

Uhhh No GIF by Brittany BroskiGiphy

6. "Make them tell you no"

There are many instances where people talk themselves out of something they desire because they're embarrassed or feel under qualified but one person offers solid advice, "'Make them tell you no.' It's great when you're not sure if you should apply for a job, go for a promotion or a raise, or do something you're afraid of. Don't be so worried about getting told no or failing, you'll surprise yourself."

7. Minding your business keeps you young

Advice so good it pops up multiple times in multiple places. If someone isn't being harmed then minding your business is free and does wonders for your life expectancy according to one person's grandfather, "My grandad lived to be 95. I asked him what the secret to a long happy life was. He told me to mind my own business."

Sick Season 4 GIF by FriendsGiphy

8. Unexpected invisible hairballs may be on the rise

Sometimes it's not years of wisdom that bring about odd advice that works wonders, advice from the mouth of a babe has an extraordinary success rate. "From my 7 year old daughter…I still laugh about it today. If you’re ever in an awkward situation with someone or need to just go away- you could always pretend to choke on something. I don’t know where this came from but it’s funny AND it works. You just run away to get a glass of water," someone adds.

9. Look out the corner of your eye

Our eyes are pretty amazing, especially when they work like they're supposed to but did you know about this advice for finding things in dim lighting? According to a commenter answering a prompt on weird advice, they claim our eyeballs have a secret superpower, "If looking for something in a low light environment, try to use your peripheral vision. I read about it in an old WWII manual about aerial combat at night. It has something to do with how eyes work. It has helped me many times over the years. For finding stuff in a darkened room, or outside in a field at night, not aerial combat."

Someone recalls the scientific reason this trick works, writing "if I remember what I learnt from school correctly, it's because rod cells, which are responsible for black-and-white vision and work fine in dim light, are more abundant in the periphery of retina compared to that in the centre."

Brushing Season 3 GIF by Nanalan'Giphy

10. Just start something

There's a saying that "anything worth doing is worth doing badly." Meaning that if you're choosing between doing nothing and doing a poor job at something due to lack of energy, depression or absence of time, it's best to do something than nothing at all. Someone shared a similar piece of advice that they received from elderly southern relatives, "Somethin’ ain’t nothin’— taking 5 minutes to workout, clean, work on a big project, etc. is better than 0 minutes. We often think we’ve got to do 2 hours of rigorous work or it doesn’t accomplish anything."

Just get started and if you've never heard of these random bits of life advice give some of them a try if you'd like to see how they work out. If you have your own weird but effective advice, drop it in the comments to share with others.