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Adorable 5-year-old gives his mom 6 pieces of spot-on advice for handling her nerves

There's no age limit on great advice.

Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash, @EPrecipice/Twitter

Kids really do say the darnedest things.

Any parent knows that kids can be surprisingly astute little philosophers at the most unexpected times. One minute your child is throwing a tantrum because you sliced their sandwich wrong, and the next they are blowing you away with their deep preschool thoughts. It's enough to give you whiplash, but it's also one of the most fun things about being around kids. You never know what they're going to say and sometimes what they say is just awesome.

Case in point: This 5-year-old who gave his mom some sage advice about handling her nerves. Twitter user @Eprecipice (StressieBessie) shared the story in a tweet thread. She wrote: "When talking about our agendas for the day, I told my 5yo I was a little nervous about a meeting I have today. He said, 'Mama, I am nervous all the time. I know what to do.' So friends, here is all the advice he could fit into the drive to school:"

1. “You gotta say your affirmations in your mouth and your heart. You say, ‘I am brave of this meeting!’ , ‘I am loved!’, ‘I smell good!’ And you can say five or three or ten until you know it.”


advice, kids, parents, moms, affirmations, good adviceA person holds an affirmation cardImage via Canva

Okay, first of all, the fact that this kiddo knows what affirmations are is awesome. Some people have questioned whether this advice really came from a 5-year-old because of the vocabulary, but kids are sponges and affirmations aren't rocket science. It's become quite common for preschools and kindergartens to teach kids things like this, so it's not actually surprising to hear him talk about affirmations. It's just adorable to hear the ones he suggests.

2. “You gotta walk big. You gotta mean it. Like Dolly on a dinosaur. Because you got it.”

Okay, so this actually is sound advice. Researcher Amy Cuddy gave a whole TED Talk about how our minds respond to our own body language, and how using confident body language can actually release chemicals in our brains that make us feel more powerful and self-assured. So "walk big" like you mean it is legit.


3. "Never put a skunk on a bus."

No idea what this means, but it's definitely solid wisdom.

4. "Think about the donuts of your day! Even if you cry a little, you can think about potato chips!"

I'm genuinely not sure if this is referencing real donuts or not, which is part of what makes it delightful advice. Metaphorically, "the donuts of your day" could be the positive things that happened, and focusing on those instead of the negative is basic positive thinking. Then again, if you cry and think about potato chips, perhaps he's just referencing comfort with food. Either way, totally feeling it.


5. "You gotta take a deep breath and you gotta do it again."

Pretty much every therapist from every psychological school of thought will tell you that breathing exercises are one of the quickest ways to calm your body and mind. Simple, but seriously sound advice.

6. "Even if it's a yucky day, you can get a hug."

Even though that sounds like a pretty typical thought for a kid, it's also good well-being advice. According to The Conversation, the chemicals released when we hug can help us manage stress, reduce anxiety and manage our emotions.

Smart kid.

He added one more piece of advice for good measure as well for those of us who tend toward distraction.




Like a little Confucius, this one.

Seriously, if you ever want to hear some of the most oddly profound things you'll ever hear in your life, spend some time interviewing a 4- or 5-year-old. They really do say the darnedest things. And if you're nervous about something, just keep telling yourself you're "brave of" it. If nothing else, it'll bring a smile to your face remembering this delightful thread.

This article originally appeared three years ago.

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Family

Mom wonders if she's alone in not wanting to go to her kid's parent-teacher conference

"This can't be an email?"

@mamasreadingjournal/TikTok

"Am I a bad mom for not wanting to go?"

For mom Tatiana (@mamasreadingjournal), the dread of having to go to her kid’s parent-teacher conference was so strong that she posted a TikTok video asking if other moms and dads felt the same way. “Do you go to your kid's parent-teacher conferences every year? Am I a bad mom for not wanting to go? Like I'm gonna go, but I really don't wanna go, you know?” she asked in the clip, just before quipping, “sorry if his teacher finds this, it's not you, I swear, it's me, I'm lazy.”

Considering Tatiana is already in communication with her kid’s teacher through an app, she also couldn't help but wonder why “this can't be an email?” A very, very relatable thought for anyone in the 21st century. Tatiana’s confession was met with…a lot of concern. Clearly, people do, in fact, feel pretty strongly about this topic. And a common point brought up was how a child might feel if their parent doesn’t show an interest in their education in this particular way.

@mamasreadingjournal Do we really have to go every year? Like let the teachers go home #parentteacherconferences #everyyyear #teachers ♬ original sound - Tatiana 📚 | The Book Mom


“Your child is worth the effort, showing up to things like this is showing up for them,” one person wrote.

Another asked, “I guess the question is why aren’t you interested in learning from your child’s teacher about how their learning journey is going, if they’re a good friend to their classmates, etc? I see how it can be an inconvenience but being a parent means being involved in their life at school as well.”

A few teachers also weighed in, who admitted that even they didn’t exactly love parent-teacher conferences. Still, one advised, “always go. As a teacher it builds the connection we have with the parent, helps communication to overall support the child.”

Another teacher was a little more blunt, saying, “girl. we don't want to go! but you create so much work for us if you don't go. we gotta document so many attempts of trying to get you in. also, your kid wants you to go. I see hs kids sad that their parents don't care to go. it's important I swear,”

There was even a heated sidebar debate as to which parent, if only one, should be attending said parent-teacher conference—the stay-at-home-parent (SAHP), or the parent who works. Some argued that the SAHP should be the one to go as part of their at-home responsibilities. Others argued that SAHPs are the ones in regular correspondence with teachers, and therefore it’s the other parent that needs to get caught up.

But all moral judgments aside, this mom wasn’t necessarily saying she planned on skipping out. She was merely sharing a feeling that quite honestly a lot of folks can probably relate to. Even the most involved parent on the planet could get overwhelmed with the ever increasing amount of random school events that seem more or less mandatory. That goes double for parents who already have demanding schedules or social anxiety, which has to describe at least 99.9% of parents, right? It more so sounds like she was looking for commiseration than anything else.

To that point, Tatiana did make a follow-up video sharing that she “did not know” that not attending a parent-teacher conference results in more work for the teacher. She assumed it meant they’d “get to go home earlier if I didn't go.” Honestly, fair assumption.

She also clarified that she did in fact go to the conference, and had always planned to go. However, she tells Upworthy that “outta my 15 minute slot we talked about my kid’s actual performance for maybe two minutes. Even my husband was shocked how much we chitchatted vs discussing actual grades and progress.”

@mamasreadingjournal Replying to @The Next Ten Minutes ♬ original sound - Tatiana 📚 | The Book Mom

But regardless, while she still feels that there’s “too much weight” put on this particular event, she will “go every year with bells on.”

“A mom who’s willing to accept feedback and adjust their attitude. We love to see it,” one astute viewer said.

This goes to show a few things. One, it’s a reminder of how so many aspects of education could stand for a revamp to fit with modern times. Two, productive conversations really can lead to better understanding. And three, parenting comes with going to a lot of things that you’d really rather not go to. Be it a parent-teacher conference or a Peppa Pig pop-up.

Also bonus number four—it can almost always be an email instead.

This article originally appeared last year.

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'He was raised right'—Tween boy offers masterclass apology after hitting neighbor's truck

This is how you take accountability, no matter what age you are.

Photo credit: Canva

A great lesson for kids and adults alike.

Many folks feel that kids today don’t have good manners. Or at the very least, it’s not the “please and thank you” filled politeness that was instilled in older generations as kids. And you can largely attribute this change in society to things like technology causing less face-to-face interactions and casual comfort taking precedence over formality—things which affect what parents teach, or don’t teach, their children.

Still, every so often there’s a kiddo whose behavior is so exemplary we find ourselves a little more hopeful for humanity. This super sweet apology, caught on tape and shared by Alondra Hernandaz, is one of those times.

Apparently, a young boy was playing soccer with his friends (kids playing outside?! A miracle!) when their ball hit part of a truck parked outside Hernandez's house, causing the alarm to go off. The boy explained all this to the doorbell camera, not actually knowing if anyone would see it. Nonetheless, he “wanted to apologize" in case the alarm disrupted others.

Watch:

@aloooh69 We ain’t even mad.🙌🏽👏🏽 #fyp #camera #neighbors #kidsoftiktok ♬ original sound - Alondra Hernandez

Unsurprisingly, Hernandez wrote “we ain’t even mad” in her video’s caption.

It wasn’t long before this wholesome apology began making the rounds on social media, where folks unanimously agreed that this young man was "raised right.” The sheer fact that no one prompted him to go up and apologize, and that he intentionally chose to do so even though no one would have ever known about the incident spoke volumes to this kid’s character.

As one person on Reddit noted, “Just the courage to go and apologize right away is awesome. I know I would have pondered 10 times before doing that as a kid.”

Another on TikTok remarked, “He knows the importance of integrity. Well done young man. Kudos to your parents.”

Parents today might not want to force formalities onto their kids, especially not in the same self-compromising way they had to endure during their own upbringing. But as this story shows, there’s something to be said about how true, authentic politeness inspires kindness, respect and empathy, which is something our world desperately needs. While this young boy may be one of those anomalies who was simply born with a sense of etiquette, he likely learned these skills over time.

Parents can use several strategies to teach children how to use manners—like positive reinforcement, instilling good tech practices, finding ways to incorporate manners into everyday routines—but none compare with setting the example themselves. We know that children learn by observing adults, so in addition to reminding a kid to say "please and thank you,” use those words yourself. Even personalize it (“thank you, this sandwich was so delicious, it hit the spot!”) so that they can see a little detail goes a long way. And of course, demonstrate polite language and respectful behavior even when the rest of the world does not. It isn't always easy to do, but nevertheless, it's very important for raising the next generation of good humans.

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Parenting

A dad realized his son treats Mom very differently when they're alone and it blew his mind

The moms have been trying to tell us!

Unsplash

A lot of dads are not aware of this.

It's hard out here being a dad. No one would argue that. But studies show dads are actually happier, less tired, and less stressed out than one very special group of people: Moms. It might sound obvious since we know the majority of childcare still tends to fall on women, but the differences between moms and dads hold up even when accounting for total time spent taking care of the kids. So what gives? At the risk of having rotten tomatoes hurled at my head, is it possible that dads are just way more chill and better at handling the stress?

Absolutely not! But it does leave a bit of a mystery. Why are dads faring better even when they spend lots of time taking care of the children? One explanation is that dads often get the easy stuff, like recreation and play, while moms tend to get stuck with more rigorous tasks like logistics, cleaning, cooking, and bathing. But that doesn't explain everything.

One dad recently had an epiphany about exactly why he finds taking care of the kids less taxing than his wife does.

A dad who posts online as @workharddadhard never found solo parenting his son to be all that challenging. He says in a now viral TikTok video that his son would usually just play quietly by himself, ask for things nicely if he needed something, and generally be pretty independent. What he never understood was why solo parenting seemed to leave his wife drained, exhausted, and desperate for help.

"For the longest time I wondered why my wife was always like 'Please, like as soon as you can, get home from work, like whenever you're done please just come home, I could really use your help here. ... It's been a long day.'"

What was she doing differently that made parenting so much harder? One day he got the chance to observe exactly what his wife had been talking about this whole time. He happened to be home during the day while Mom was in charge and saw "our son just do things that he never ever did with me and it was crazy."

"Our kid acts completely different around his mom," he said, adding that the epiphany "blew his mind."

Watch the whole video here:

@workharddadhard

When I was home, our son would play by himself, ask for things nicely, but then when it was just mom, things changed…

Commenters chimed in by the thousands to confirm: Kids are often needier and more poorly behaved for mom. And more dads need to get the memo.

This dad wasn't the only parent whose kid does a Jekyll and Hyde act depending on which parent they're with. He also wasn't the only dad who had no idea this was even a thing, at least until recently:

"A lot of dads are not aware of this."

"Coming from a mom, it's so unfair. and dads often don't see it so they don't get why we're stressed and overwhelmed at the end of the day"

"More dads need to understand this. this is why they judge moms for being exhausted and wonder why 'nothing' gets done around the house. or why they need a break."

"Thanks for acknowledging. My kids ask me for things 1000x a day and when my husband is alone with them, they don’t need anything, never hungry and play by themselves"

"My children are insanely needy for me, but wildly independent problem solvers with my husband"


gif of man having a breakdownSome kids are like Jekyll and Hyde depending on which parent they're withGiphy

Some parents offered the theory that kids were more likely to act out because they felt safer with mom:

"Kids act out the most whoever they are most comfortable with. They know their feelings and big emotions are safe," one commenter wrote.

The research backs this up. It's the same mechanism at work that causes your kids to behave perfectly at school but raise hell at home. The more comfortable and securely attached they are to you, the more likely they are to be vulnerable and let out their big feelings (and true nature). They may feel more empowered to ask you for or demand help, or generally misbehave. When Mom is the primary caregiver, which is usually the case, it's natural that kids will feel even a little bit safer with her than Dad. That means she gets the short end of the stick when it comes to clinginess and bad behavior.

There are two takeaways here for parents. First, if your kid is well-behaved for everyone including your partner, but a terror for you, it doesn't mean you're doing something wrong! In fact, though it may be little comfort, it probably just means that they feel the safest and most connected to you. Second, remember that your partner isn't being dramatic if they're feeling burnt out by the kid but you're not. Believe them, support them, and for God's sake, be there to give them a break.

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