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Man unexpectedly dies during brain scan. What scientists saw should give everyone comfort.

They may have uncovered the secrets of our final moments.

via Canva

A doctor is analyzing brain scans.

Death remains one of the greatest mysteries of life. It’s impossible to know what happens as a person passes and whether there’s anything afterward because no one has ever been able to report what happens from beyond the grave. Of course, if you ask those with a keen interest in the supernatural, they may say otherwise.

However, in 2021, researcher Dr. Raul Vicente and his colleagues at the University of Tartu, Estonia, became the first people ever to record the brainwaves of someone in the process of dying, and what they’ve come to realize should be very comforting to everyone. “We measured 900 seconds of brain activity around the time of death and set a specific focus to investigate what happened in the 30 seconds before and after the heart stopped beating,” Dr. Ajmal Zemmar, a neurosurgeon at the University of Louisville, US, who organized the study, told Frontiers.


The patient who died while having his brain waves measured was 87 years old and had epilepsy. While researchers were studying his brain to learn more about the condition, they had a heart attack and passed away. “Just before and after the heart stopped working, we saw changes in a specific band of neural oscillations, so-called gamma oscillations, but also in others such as delta, theta, alpha, and beta oscillations,” Zemmar said.

The different types of brain oscillations that occurred in the patient before and after the heart attack were associated with high cognitive functions, including dreaming, concentrating, memory retrieval, and memory flashbacks. Therefore, it’s possible that as the patient was dying, they had their life flash before their eyes. What an amazing and comforting experience right before leaving this mortal coil.

“Through generating oscillations involved in memory retrieval, the brain may be playing a last recall of important life events just before we die, similar to the ones reported in near-death experiences,” Zemmar speculated. “These findings challenge our understanding of when exactly life ends and generate important subsequent questions, such as those related to the timing of organ donation.”


How long are people conscious after they are technically dead?

Science has found that people can remain conscious up to 20 seconds after they are declared dead. Even after the heart and breathing have stopped, the cerebral cortex can hang on for a while without oxygen. So, some people may experience the moment when they hear themselves declared dead, but they aren’t able to move or react to the news. In cases where someone performs CPR on the deceased person, the blood pumped by the compressions can temporarily keep the brain alive as well.

Although the experience of death will probably always remain a mystery, we should take solace in the idea that, in many cases, it may not necessarily be a miserable experience but an ecstatic final burst of consciousness that welcomes us into the great beyond. “Something we may learn from this research is: although our loved ones have their eyes closed and are ready to leave us to rest, their brains may be replaying some of the nicest moments they experienced in their lives,” Zemmar concludes.

This article originally appeared in February

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Hospice nurse shares clue she uses to know if someone is dying 6 months before it happens

"Allow the body to be the guide."

via Sabinevanerp/Pixabay

An old woman holding a cane.

Death is the last great mystery that all of us face. We don’t know when we will go or can really be sure what comes next. So there’s understandably a lot of fear and uncertainty that most of us feel around death, whether we’re thinking about ourselves or a loved one. That’s why Julie McFadden's work is so important. As a palliative care nurse in the Los Angeles area, who has seen over a hundred people die, her TikTok videos shed light on the process to make us all a bit more comfortable with the inevitable.

McFadden is also the author of the bestseller, “Nothing to Fear.” The nurse’s experience helping people in their final stages has given her a unique perspective on the process. In a recent video, she shared how she can see the first symptoms that someone is going to die a natural death about 6 months before they finally do.

Interestingly, she can determine that someone only has half a year left to live when most of us have no idea they have entered the final stages of life.

@hospicenursejulie

Replying to @Mariah educating yourself about scary topics will help decrease fear. ✨Nothing to Fear ✨- my book- out june 11th #hospicenursejulie #hospicenurse #caregiversoftiktok #medicaltiktok #learnontiktok #nothingtofearbook

What are the symptoms of dying at the 6-month mark?

McFadden adds that people who are dying are usually placed in hospice care when the symptoms begin to appear around the 6-month mark.

"You will have very generalized symptoms. Those symptoms will usually be, one, you will be less social. So you'll be more introverted than extroverted," McFadden said. "Two, you will be sleeping a lot more. And three, you will be eating and drinking a lot less. Literally, everyone on hospice, I see this happen to."

heaven, clouds, ray of lightA Ray of light over a mountain. via PIxbay/Pexels



What are the symptoms of dying at the 3-month mark?

You are going to notice more debility,” McFadden continues. “They will be staying in their house most of the time. It's going to be difficult getting up and just going to the bathroom. Again, sleeping a lot more and eating and drinking a lot less.”

What are the symptoms of dying at the 1-month mark?

Something usually begins to happen in the final month of someone’s life. They start to believe they are in contact with others they have lost. It’s like they are there to make the dying person feel comfortable with their final transition.

"Usually around the one month mark is when people will start seeing 'the unseen', they have the visioning. They'll be seeing dead relatives, dead loved ones, dead pets, old friends who have died,” McFadden said. “Again, not everyone — but many, many people will start seeing these things at around one month."

heaven, death, trumpetAn angel with a trumpet.via PixaBay/Pexels

Angela Morrow, a registered nurse at Verywell Health, agrees that people in the final stage of life often hear from those who have passed before them. Morrow says we should refrain from correcting the patients when they share their stories of talking to people and pets who have died. "You might feel frustrated because you can't know for sure whether they're hallucinating, having a spiritual experience, or just getting confused. The uncertainty can be unsettling, but it's part of the process," Morrow writes.

At the end of the video, McFadden says that the most important factors palliative care nurses look at to determine the stage of death are eating, drinking and sleeping. “Most people, a few weeks out from death, will be sleeping more than they are awake. And they will be barely eating and barely drinking,” McFadden said.

i.giphy.com

In the end, hospice nurses “allow the body to be the guide” as they help their patients transition from life to death.

McFadden’s work has brought a lot of peace to her followers as they go through trying times. "My mom is in hospice right now and she’s currently, I think, hours or days from death. YourTikToks have helped me out tremendously," Deb wrote. "My grandma passed away in February, and she experienced all of this. this page brings me peace knowing everything she went through was natural," Jaida added.

"Thanks, Julie. I volunteer in a hospice end-of-life facility, and this helps educate the families. Your posts are wonderful," Grandma Nita wrote.

One of the things that makes death so scary is the number of unknowns surrounding the process. That’s why it’s so important that McFadden shares her stories of helping people to the next side. She shows that death is a natural process and that hospice nurses are here to help make the transition as peaceful as possible.

This article originally appeared last year.

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Health

Chaplain who comforted thousands of dying people reveals their most common regret

It's a great lesson that we could all learn from.

via Tampa General Hospital and Canva/Photos

Chaplain J.S. Park and a man on his deathbed.

The regrets of the dying are tragedies for those who are leaving this world. However, for the living, they can be valuable lessons on how to live a happy and meaningful life that benefits others. That way, when we reach the end, we can do so peacefully, knowing that we got the most out of this one lifetime.

Joon Park, who goes by J.S. Park on social media, is a chaplain at Tampa General Hospital who describes himself as a “grief catcher” and is the author of “As Long as You Need: Permission to Grieve.” He has sat at the bedsides of thousands of people who are in the process of passing away, and that’s given him a very unique perspective on life. He knows the greatest gift to give to the dying is listening so they can feel heard before they leave this world.

What’s the biggest regret of the dying?

He told CNN that in his conversations with the dying, there is one regret that he hears the most: “I only did what everyone else wanted, not what I wanted.”

“Many of us near the end realize we were not able to fully be ourselves in life – we had to hide to survive,” he continued. “It was not always our fault. Sometimes, our resources, the systems, and culture around us did not allow us to. My hope is always to fully see and hear this patient, who is now finally free. ”

dying, hospice, j.s. parkA man in the final moments of his life.via Canva/Photos

It must feel terrible to walk through life feeling like a square peg in a round hole, having a job you don’t like, a spouse who doesn’t understand you, or having to live up to standards that you didn’t create. It’s upsetting that many people experience this, and Park’s advice reminds us to ask ourselves a serious question: Am I living my life or the life someone else has chosen for me?

Park said that people's most common fear towards the end of their lives is whether their loved ones will be okay after they’re gone.

“Will my loved ones be OK without me? Who will look after Mom? Who will take my dad to the doctor? How will my son and daughter get along without me? Even my patients who are most at peace with their dying are still anxious about how their own death will affect their family,” he says. The fear shows that even when people are ready to leave this world, they never stop caring for those closest to them.

“This is almost an empathic anticipatory grief, experiencing the grief of the other person’s future loss. We are so connected that often we worry about how other people will be affected by our own death,” Park said.


How to know if you're living your own life

How do we know if we are living our own life and not that of others? It’s a big question, but according to Follow Your Own Rythm, a great place to start is to stop letting fear or society’s expectations dictate your path. Instead, express yourself freely, follow your passions, live by your core values, and spend time with yourself, touching base with your thoughts and feelings. You’ll know you’re living your life when it begins to feel more harmonious and authentic.

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Internet

Hospice nurses share their patients' wildest death bed confessions, and it's eye-opening

Sometimes people wait until the very end to deliver a "mic drop" moment.

Photo credit: Canva

Impending death is the ultimate confessional, it seems.

Death comes for us all, and with it often comes one last opportunity to speak our full truth. Whether for religious reasons or to finally release psychological baggage, many find themselves wishing to expose long held secrets once they know the end is drawing near.

Of course, there are reasons why people wait until they are on their deathbed to make such confessions. Often they revolve around illegal activity, abuse, cheating, or other choices that might either incriminate themselves or hurt relationships if shared while they are still living.

Most of the time, these confessions aren’t even made to a family member or loved one, but to strangers providing hospice care. This undoubtedly offers an additional level of safety while disclosing sensitive information. However, for the nurses and other hospice workers, hearing these stories can’t be an easy part of the job.

Recently, nurses shared some of the more shocking deathbed confessions they’ve heard in their professional careers, and while the conversation shines a light on the darker side of humanity, it’s also a glimpse into the beauty of this brief candle that is life.

Many nurses shared moments when their patients simply knew the end had come.

This isn’t a confession, per se, but clearly a common phenomenon:

“I've had a few people casually tell me, "I'm going to die today." The first time someone who was awake, alert and not-in-distress told me that (then died later that day), I was spooked. Then, I learned to believe them.”

hospice nurse and patient talking to each other "I took her to the bathroom and right there in my arms she went home…Photo credit: Canva

“Brought a pediatric patient back for emergency heart surgery (about 14yrs old). He was very nervous. Outlook looked grim. I held his hand as they began to induce anesthesia. He looked like he was about to cry. I told him there was nothing to worry about. He was gonna be just fine. He gripped my hand super tight as the propfol took hold, looked me in the eye and said 'I'm going to die, aren't I?' I told him I would be there in PACU when he woke up. He died on the table. I was the last thing he ever saw. 8 years later I still think about that kid. I still see his face. The fear in his eyes. I still feel guilty that I lied right to his face…”

“I don’t know if this fits in here, but the first death I witnessed was in a dementia ward. The patient has been sad and depressed as long as I’d known her. No matter what we did to cheer her up, it just didn’t stick. One morning I went in to her room to get her out of bed and make her ready for the day, she sat up in her bed with her feet straight out. She somehow looked like a little child and she was smiling. Delighted that she looked happy I exclaimed : 'Are you already up, friend?' She answered, so happy and so smiley: 'yes, I’m going home today' I took her to the bathroom and right there in my arms she went home…I was young and it scared me back then, but now I cherish that memory. We should all be so lucky to leave the world happy and content.”

Then there are other signs, such as seeing an already deceased loved one, or seeing celestial beings.

“When they tell me this or that deceased relative visited them the day or night before, I know something will go down.”

“I’m a nurse now and honestly have seen much more sudden and traumatic deaths since this one, but this one always is the first I think of…There was this one resident who was much younger than most there, only in her mid 60s. She was in really rough physical and mental shape due to severe liver failure and other compounding issues for years…The day I was wearing new scrubs and in there cleaning her like normal, she suddenly looked right at me and in a very soft, clear voice said, ‘you look like an angel.’ I remember being pretty shocked that she spoke out loud and kinda just said, ‘isn’t this a pretty color??’ She went back to being nonverbal the rest of the shift and I remember thinking about it a lot until I went home. When I got back 2 days later I found out she had died in her sleep that night.”

As hinted at earlier, there were a LOT of death bed confessions involving, well, salacious secrets.

nurse holds the hand of elderly person in bed“An old lady told me she had a 22 year long affair with a bus driver, and all five of her adult children might be his."Photo credit: Canva

“Working in oncology at the time, had an older gentleman with liver cancer that had spread everywhere including his brain. Having brain mets made him very vague, often nonsensical, he was in and out of consciousness…He also had a thick Eastern European accent…Anyways, one day I’m taking his vitals and he grabs my hand, looks me straight in the eyes and just says to me ‘you know, I have killed so many people’ in his very strong accent. I kind of just froze and didn’t know what to say but he let go and went back to sleep/reduced consciousness.”

“An old lady told me she had a 22 year long affair with a bus driver, and all five of her adult children might be his. I didn't pass that along.”

“I work with dementia clients…A mind blowing confession I always think about was a veteran who confessed to all the war crimes he committed and how he felt so terrible for all the things he did. He said this was the reason he had no relationship with his family and to be honest I don't blame his family for not having anything to do with him.”

“I've had a few senior women who are in different stages of dementia describe violent SA they experienced as children, many of the stories were similar in the sense of when they told their parents they were blamed or not taken seriously. Really heart breaking but I never knew if they were actually true stories.”

“I once had a man who was extremely sick, confused and at the end stages of life. I had only dealt with him on 2 separate occasions a few days apart so wasn't super familiar with him. He confessed on both occasions to beating a woman to death in great detail…not sure if it was the confusion or true, but the amount of details he had and the way he said he was ready to be put away for it was really disturbing.”

“That none of her adult kids were her husband’s - and there were 4 of them , and none of them knew.”

woman helps an elderly woman walk with a cane in a room with other elderly people socializing "Approach everything with gusto ladies and gentlemen, like it might be your last time.”Photo credit: Canva

“I work in a nursing home. One of our residents was a well-known local pimp in his younger years. It involved filming videos of young girls for his rental business. Nicest man in the world now…Another resident harbored a known serial killer when there was a statewide manhunt for him. She was related by marriage and this was what women did for the men back in the day… A third resident did hard time for having stockpiled explosives in his house…Those are just a couple of backstories I know. It can make caring for people…complicated. You really have to suspend judgement and deal compassionately with what’s right in front of you.”

Then there were some that really just fell into their own category…

“That she liked Hitler because she was poor as a child and she would only get new shoes when she went to the train station to see the Jews off to the concentration camps.”

“I've got several, but this is one of my favorites. 98 yrs old guy heart failure…I asked him ‘so, 98 yrs. What have you learned?’ His response was awesome. He said ‘sex. If I knew the last time I had it was going to be the last time, I would not have been such a gentleman’…Approach everything with gusto ladies and gentlemen, like it might be your last time.”

But on a brighter note, not every daybed confession contained so much gloom and doom.

Just as many stories, though still heartbreaking in their own way, revolved around forgiveness, gratitude, and a longing to feel or express love.

hospice nurse shows elderly woman in chair something on her phone"They basically just held hands and apologized to each other and died together.”Photo credit: Canva

“A mother and son were cooking meth and the house exploded. They both had enough burns they were not going to make it. They basically just held hands and apologized to each other and died together.”

“Working in dementia care I was helping a resident with a bath having a typical conversation with him about his day, my day, etc…Near the end he thanked me [my name] for the help but then he quickly grabbed my hand saying “Thank you for being here [daughters name]”, she hadn’t visited him in a long time. He dozed off as I was cleaning up supplies and when patted his hand as a goodbye gesture not to wake him, I realized he had passed. I was 16, it really shaped my perception of both death and love.”

“Patient once told me he wished he had worked less and spent more time traveling and being with friends and family. He died the next day, not on my shift. It stuck in my head. A few years later I retired and this was one of the reasons. It changed my perspective.”

“I had an elderly lady in for shortness of breath…She had been with us for about 5 hours at this point, she's ready for imaging so the husband goes to get her an overnight bag and we head to imaging. Fully lucid…[she] asks me to tell her husband when he came back that she loves him very much and has enjoyed her life with him. 15 minutes later we return to the room, I plug her monitor back into the podium and she arrests. She didn't get to tell him she loved him that one last time like I reassured her she would. I often think about that man, I think he would have shortly passed from a broken heart. The way he looked at her after 70+ years of marriage.”

One has to wonder what holding onto such things does to our quality of life. On the other hand, maybe there never is a right time to share our secrets, until there isn’t any time left.

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