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Joy

Jimmy Fallon asked people to share their worst first dates, and some were just laughably bad

Romance doesn't always come easily, does it?

YouTube/Twitter

As the saying goes, "You have to kiss a few frogs..."

Dating has certainly evolved over the years—we’ve gone from courtship being purely a financial arrangement (not that this trend has ever truly died) to knights jousting for a lady’s favor, to casual hookups, to now, when romance is primarily found through an app more than anything else.

Technology used for meeting that special someone has become so advanced that you can base your search entirely upon specific interests. Like, oddly specific interests. Think a fellow cat person would be the purrfect match? There’s an app for that. Wish to “love long and prosper” with a fellow Trekkie? There’s an app for that too.

No matter the changes, one thing remains the same—dating is awkward. It’s got all the unspoken formalities of a job interview, disguised as innocent fun. The balance between playing it too cool and too eager is hard to find even for the smoothest among us, and usually results in total embarrassment. Even if we aren’t the ones committing those embarrassing acts ourselves, we are often the reluctant witness to them.

Terrible dates might not always be fun in the moment, but they can be just as important as the good ones. They can teach us a lot about ourselves and what qualities we want in a partner. And at the very least, they can teach us to embrace social clumsiness with a sense of humor.

Jimmy Fallon recently asked his Tonight Show audience on X (formerly Twitter) to share a “funny or embarrassing first date story” for his ever popular #Hashtags segment. The best part—some of these awful first dates ended in marriage. There’s hope for us all.

Below, find 15 stories that are truly the best of the worst. How do some of your first dates compare?

1. "After a nice dinner, she invited me to her house. On the way up, inside the elevator, I decided to push the button to stop between floors and give her a kiss... She had a phobia of closed spaces and she smacked my face as a reflex, two punches after we were kissing and laughing.” – @PanqueAlgarvio

2. “His jeans were so tight he couldn’t sit down. Stood at a bar stool the whole time.” – @onlyintheozarks

3. “Waiting 4 my date when an older couple asked me for a ride. my date came up and said sure! We drove them home & they asked us to come in. Date said “sure”. I pulled him back & asked why he wanted to hang w/strangers. He said ‘sh@t! YOU DON'T KNOW THEM!?’ We bolted!” – @natashaham75

Gif of Seinfeld

Talk about a fashion faux pas.

Giphy

4. “Before the date, we had been chatting about books we liked and I talked about a great book I just read. We went on the date. I loaned her the book. She ghosted me.” – @thenextbarstool

5. “The worst first date I ever had was when my date locked his keys in the car and I had a curfew so he had to break his car window out to get me home on time. Didn’t think I’d ever see him again but we wound up married.” – @csleblan

6. “First date movie ‘Basic Instinct’ not realizing how suggestive it was. We just thought it was a mystery thriller! We left the movie discussing how each character could have actually murdered someone. We're married now.” – @Southrnbell_Amy

Gif of woman in white dress smoking a cigarette

There are worse first date movies tbh.

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7. “First date with my ex husband was a double date with his parents. The preview for ‘Speed Racer’ came on, and she leaned over me to say to her son, ‘You know what your dad's nickname in the bedroom is?’" – @theostoria

8. “A friend asked me on a double date as a blind date with his date's friend. I went to the bathroom and came back just in time to hear my date say to her friend, ‘why do I get the ugly one?’ I said good night to all three and headed home, leaving her w/the bill.” – @StevenTrustum

9. “He loved cheese. I was subjected to a 2 hour conversation/lecture about cheese, and why cottage cheese is not cheese!” – @Optimist_Eeyore

Gif of man with words, "I eat all of the cheese"

I'd like to see this two-hour cheese lecture.

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10. “He took me to an Asian fish market. We walked around looking at live & dead fish for a while. I don’t like seeing dead animals & I don’t eat seafood. Then we sat on a curb & he pulled out a ziplock bag of pineapple for us to share. I don’t like pineapple.” – @markayhali

11. “My cousin set up a first date for me with a family friend. During a break from dinner, Mr. Man follows me into the ladies’ room, comes up close and says in a low voice, ‘I shave my butt.’ Can’t remember what I said in response but the evening ended abruptly.” – @carli_zarzana

12. “I once took out my high school crush to a sports bar and ordered the spiciest wings there in an attempt to impress her. Not only was she not impressed. The next morning I woke up with heartburn.” –@Dmonster38

Gif of Millie Bobby brown on Hot Ones

Talk about a hot date.

GIF

13. “My date showed up with his bestie and girlfriend, and they talked through dinner about people I don’t know. Walking to the car, he gave me a wedgie because he thought he hadn’t been paying enough attention to me.” – @surrealDazey


14. “I was taking my date home and was pulled over by the police for speeding. When the cop came to my car, she jumped out and told him she had to get home. She walked home and I never heard from her again. I'm not sure who's #WorstFirstDate it was mine or hers!” – @eastriverbear

15. “After an evening of dancing with a first date, leaving the dance hall, I had to take a quick pee break. Rushing out to the parking lot, I see a lady, I grab her and swoop her around, and plant a big wet kiss on the lips. She was another guy's wife. Oops!” – @seadogskamore

Gif of the Addams Family

Only Gomez could have gotten away with it.

Giphy

This article originally appeared three years ago.

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Joy

A new study found this flirting strategy to be the most effective, regardless of your looks

It's science!

via Pexels

A couple enjoying a glass of wine.

In the 1988 Disney classic “Who Framed Roger Rabbit,” the titular character is in an unlikely relationship with his voluptuous wife Jessica. Roger is a frantic, anxious rabbit with a penchant for mischief, while Jessica is a quintessential ’40s bombshell who stands about a foot and a half taller and isn’t “bad,” just “drawn that way.”

When private investigator Eddie Valiant asked Jessica what she sees in “that guy?” she replies, “He makes me laugh.” This type of couple may seem like something we only see in the movies, but don’t underestimate the power of humor when it comes to attractiveness. A new study published in Evolutionary Psychology found that being humorous is the most effective way to flirt for both men and women.

“People think that humour, or being able to make another person laugh, is most effective for men who are looking for a long-term relationship. It’s least effective for women who are looking for a one-night stand. But laughing or giggling at the other person's jokes is an effective flirtation tactic for both sexes,” says Leif Edward Ottesen Kennair, a professor at the Norwegian University of Science and Technology's (NTNU) Department of Psychology.

“It is not only effective to be funny, but for women, it is very important that you show your potential partner that you think they are funny,” Rebecca Burch, a co-author from SUNY Oswego in New York, added.

Unfortunately, this study was only conducted on heterosexual couples.

For men, showing off their sense of humor was found to be the most effective way to flirt whether they were looking for a short-term or a long-term relationship. For women, being funny was the most effective tactic when looking for a long-term relationship. For people looking for a short-term fling, appearing available was the most effective tactic.

According to the study, humor is effective regardless of one's attractiveness. “Individual differences in age, religiosity, extroversion, personal attractiveness and preferences for short-term sexual relationships had little or no effect on how effective respondents considered the various flirting tactics to be,” says study co-author Prof. Mons Bendixen.

If you see someone you like but don’t think you’re good-looking enough for them, give it a shot. You may still have a chance if you can make ’em laugh.

The most effective tactics for those looking for a long-term relationship:

For women:

1. Makes him laugh

2. Shows interest in conversations

3. Spends time with him

4. Engages in deep conversations

5. Kisses on mouth

For men:

1. Makes her laugh

2. Spends time with her

3. Shows interest in conversations

4. Engages in deep conversations

5. Smiles

The study is proof that looks aren’t everything and shows that having a good sense of humor isn’t just about making someone laugh. A great sense of humor is evidence that someone is intelligent, wise, perceptive, confident, can see things from new perspectives and has good intuition. It also helps people quickly build bonds and share experiences, which is a great way to get close to someone in a fast and fun way.

So why wouldn’t Jessica be with Roger? The guy is hilarious.


This story originally appeared two years ago.

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Education

Dating expert says to 'stop chasing the spark' and ask these 8 post-date questions instead

Dating "like a scientist" can apparently save you a lot of headaches and heartaches. Here's how.

Photo credit: Canva

Dating is hard. But this can help make it easier.

Sure, it’s amazing when we go on a date and instantly hit it off with another person. But let’s be honest, that doesn’t always happen. And that can be for myriad reasons which don’t necessarily indicate a lack of romantic potential—nerves, having an off day, feeling self conscious, etc.

This is part of what can make dating, especially frequent dating, so frustrating. It’s easy to know what to do after a terrible date—never see that person again. Done. But those somewhere-in-the-middle dates, the ones that don’t rise to rom-com level but still manage to be pleasant enough…how do you effectively assess those?

According to one expert, it all comes down to eight simple questions.

While appearing on the Diary of a CEO podcast, behavioral scientist Logan Ury (who also happens to be the Director of Relationship Science at Hinge) shared how so many people approach dating by doing what she called “relation-shopping.”

Ury likened it to shopping for a pair of bluetooth headphones, saying, “you log onto Amazon and you say ‘okay I want ones that are this color, this weight, this battery life.’ And you start to think ‘oh, I can shop for a partner the same way.’”

But that strategy doesn’t work, Ury noted, because it doesn't focus on how both partners interact together, and it enables a person to make judgments based on assumptions. Ury used the example of not wanting to date someone whose parents were divorced because they “must not know how to be in a great relationship.”

Instead, Ury encouraged people to “date like a scientist.” Which of course means testing theories, remaining open to being wrong, and of course, asking questions.

With that, here is the “post-date eight” checklist you can use to evaluate whether or not a person is right for you:

1) What side of me did this person bring out?

2) How did my body feel during the day? Stiff, relaxed, or somewhere in between?

3) Do I feel more or less energized than I did before the date?

4) Is there something about them that makes me curious?

5) Did they make me laugh?

6) Did I feel heard?

7) Did I feel desire in their presence?

8) Did I feel captivated, bored or somewhere in between?

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Part of what makes the post date eight so effective, according to Ury, is how it “trains you to tune into your experience” and treat the date as though it were a “job interview.” Ury also notes that the first question is particularly important, because "whoever that person brings out in you is who you will be for the rest of your life in that relationship and don't you want to be the happy, secure, desired, hilarious version of yourself?"

Fair point, Ury. Fair point.

Lastly, Ury encouraged folks that feeling an instant “spark” truly isn’t everything. In fact, they often burn out. “Slow burn” connections, on the other hand, often denote secure, long lasting partnerships.

The post-date eight can therefore act as a “new barometer,” retraining your brain to stop chasing “initial chemistry,” (and therefore avoid the “anxious-avoidant loop” that comes with it) and instead gauge whether or not "interest is gaging upwards.”

This new way of dating might not work as a movie plot. But for real life…it does sound promising.

relationships
Humor

Guy turns dating advice on its head with 34 heartfelt 'playa moves' for single men

Excellent advice for men that actually works.

BlanksheetPlaya/TikTok

A relatively unknown creator on TikTok has been making waves recently.

Known as "Blanksheet Playa," the creator from Vancouver has been dishing out tips for men for the past couple of months: Tips for dating, self-confidence, health, fitness, you name it.

He recently went mega viral in an untagged post on X, so I had to track him down and see his videos for myself.

I was not disappointed by what I found.

The advice is — what he calls "Playa Moves" — is not what you'd expect.

In one of Blanksheet Playa's most popular videos, he gives words of encouragement for guys who are nervous when talking to girls.

"Playa move. If you are nervous when speaking to a female, communicate that to her. By saying this out loud, it will automatically calm your nerves. And if she is a good person, she will provide comfort. This will, in turn, relax you even further and allow the best of your personality to shine through."

And then he hits his signature sign off. "Real playa shit."

@blanksheet.playa

Playa move number seventeen.

Here's another 'playa move' from the man himself. "Respect women at all times."

Respect is, according to Blanksheet, the key distinction between a player and a playa.

"Players deceive, undermine and lie to women to get into bed with them. Playas use our ability in a positive way, to have mutually respecting and honest relationships with women."


@blanksheet.playa

Playa move number six.

Here are a few other certified 'Playa Moves' to improve your dating life and self-confidence:

To date, he's offered 34 Playa Moves. Here are a few of my favorites.

  • Get serious about wearing condoms (good advice for Gen Z men who refuse to do this)
  • Go down on your women (the oral sex gap is real, and due for a shakeup)
  • Receive all hate with love (just a good way to make the world a better place)

(Not all the tips are a homerun. Like "Never read," and "Hide your emotions" — come on, playa.)

The Playa Moves are resonating with guys and girls everywhere.

"so many men don't realize that just being authentic and kind will take you further than any kind of bravado ever will," one commenter wrote.

"i was waiting for a punchline,' wrote another about the bait-and-switch set up to the videos, "and then by the end i didn’t want a punchline"

"Wow, I expected a joke but that was solid advice," added another.

I've come across enough terrible Gen Z dating advice on TikTok to know the good stuff when I see it.

Most of it has to do with trying to become someone you're not, whether it's reshaping your mouth and eyebrows with creams and daily stretches, or talking less to appear more mysterious.

Here's a dude advocating for people to be the best version of their authentic selves, and to be open and honest in their communications. If people don't like you as you are? Blanksheet says that's cool, there are plenty of fish in the sea.

Even better, he's doing it in a funny way, which helps the message spread even farther.

Keep it up, playa. This is the advice guys really need right now.

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