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Retired elementary school teacher shares biggest parenting mistake she saw during long career

Few people understand kids better than elementary school teachers.

Photo by April Walker on Unsplash
Retired elementary school teacher shares biggest parenting mistake she saw during long career

Few people understand kids better than elementary school teachers. Not only do they spend all day with kids, but teachers get to know their students' parents pretty well, too. From parent-teacher conferences to field trips and snack days, it's a collaborative relationship meant to foster their child's development. (And let's be real: what parent hasn't gotten a call from their child's teacher to discuss their *questionable* behavior in the classroom?)

Teachers are full of wisdom about kids, which is why TikToker @elenanico22 interviewed her mom Lisa, a retired elementary school teacher, in an advice video. She asked her mom to share her insights on the question: "What's one thing you saw people messing up with their kids?"

And her response was simple: "They didn't enjoy them." Elena asks her mom to elaborate, and she goes on to share, "Kids are fun. You’ve got to enjoy them. They wanted them to be something that — most of us aren’t exactly what other people want us to be — so enjoy the kid you have."

@elenanico22

Lisa says it like it is #momlife #momsoftiktok #momwisdom #momtok #momhumor #parenting #parentingwisdom

Of course, Lisa fully accepted her own daughter, and turns to Elena in the video and says, "I enjoyed you."

And the comments were flooded with positive replies from parents to her response. "Kids aren’t a chore, they’re a joy. 🥰," one wrote. Another added, "Parents are stressed, and they don’t realize how quickly childhood goes by."

ParentsKids Love GIF by Pudgy PenguinsGiphy

The post also resonated with other teachers and professionals who work with kids. "This is so true. I work in childcare and lots of parents literally cannot stand their kids. They get so angry when we close. They can’t wait to drop them off and pickup last minute. Breaks my heart," one commented. Another wrote, "Toddler teacher. Same. So heartbreaking. I saw it a lot when I worked with highly educated parents with high incomes." And another teacher chimed in with, "So true. As a elementary teacher sometimes playing Barbie Dreamhouse with my 4 y/o is the last thing I want to do but I always do because I know I'll be wishing for it one day ♥️." And another professional shared, "As a pediatrician, I agree."

The video concluded with another piece of strong advice from Lisa, who also dropped this nugget: "Never send your kid to school with carrots." The reason? She explained a story involving a prominent doctor at her school who was "super strict" with what his kids could and could not eat at school.

Carrotshamster GIFGiphy

"So of course what did the kids want? Everything they couldn't," she said. "You are bound to have kids who are going to have food issues."

And plenty of parents offered their thoughts on this. "Omg I love her! Please post more. As a mom I’m enjoying time with my kids, loving their personalities and so anti food restriction teaching them intuitive eating. Because I wasn’t taught those things," one commented. Another shared, "The food statement is so true. My son shared that a boy from his class (who has food restrictions) steals the other kids snacks at school! 🙈❤️😂"

This article originally appeared in January

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10 things most kids don't know about their mothers

1. You made her cry ... a lot.



Pregnant.

There it was, clear as day, two blue lines staring back at me from the small pregnancy test I had just purchased.

I double-checked...

One line = not pregnant.

Two lines = pregnant.

Photo via iStock.


Yup, I was definitely pregnant.

My heart was pounding.

My head was spinning.

My stomach was churning.

I was nervous, excited, scared, and ecstatic all at the same time.

Photo via iStock.

This was actually happening! After years of dreaming, preparing for, and anticipating this day, it was finally here. I was going to be a mother.

Little did I know that in nine short months, I would begin the most exhausting, life-changing, heart-wrenching, but indescribably rewarding journey of my life.

In nine months, I would learn the price of motherhood firsthand. I would know exactly what it takes to be a mother. I would gain a whole new understanding of and gratitude for the beautiful woman I call Mom.

I would learn about things mothers experience that their children often know very little about.

Here are 10 things your mom never told you.

1. You made her cry ... a lot.

She cried when she found out she was pregnant. She cried as she gave birth to you. She cried when she first held you. She cried with happiness. She cried with fear. She cried with worry. She cried because she feels so deeply for you. She felt your pain and your happiness and she shared it with you, whether you realized it or not.

2. She wanted that last piece of pie.

But when she saw you look at it with those big eyes and lick your mouth with that tiny tongue, she couldn't eat it. She knew it would make her much happier to see your little tummy be filled than hers.

3. It hurt.

When you pulled her hair, it hurt; when you grabbed her with those sharp fingernails that were impossible to cut, it hurt; when you bit her while drinking milk, that hurt, too. You bruised her ribs when you kicked her from her belly; you stretched her stomach out for nine months; you made her body contract in agonizing pain as you entered this world.

4. She was always afraid.

From the moment you were conceived, she did all in her power to protect you. She became your mama bear. She was that lady who wanted to say no when the little girl next door asked to hold you and who cringed when she did because in her mind no one could keep you as safe as she herself could. Her heart skipped two beats with your first steps. She stayed up late to make sure you got home safe and woke up early to see you off to school. With every stubbed toe and little stumble, she was close by; she was ready to snatch you up with every bad dream or late-night fever. She was there to make sure you were OK.

She stayed up late to make sure you got home safe and woke up early to see you off to school.

5. She knows she's not perfect.

She is her own worst critic. She knows all her flaws and sometimes hates herself for them. She is hardest on herself when it comes to you, though. She wanted to be the perfect mom, to do nothing wrong — but because she is human, she made mistakes. She is probably still trying to forgive herself for them. She wishes with her whole heart that she could go back in time and do things differently, but she can't, so be kind to her and know she did the best she knew how to do.


6. She watched you as you slept.

There were nights when she was up 'til 3 a.m. praying that you would finally fall asleep. She could hardly keep her eyes open as she sang to you, and she would beg you to "please, please fall asleep." Then, when you finally fell asleep, she would lay you down, and all her tiredness would disappear for a short second as she sat by your bedside looking down at your perfect cherub face, experiencing more love than she knew was possible, despite her worn-out arms and aching eyes.

7. She carried you a lot longer than nine months.

You needed her to. So she did. She would learn to hold you while she cleaned; she would learn to hold you while she ate; she would even hold you while she slept because it was the only way she could sometimes. Her arms would get tired, her back would hurt, but she held you still because you wanted to be close to her. She snuggled you, loved you, kissed you, and played with you. You felt safe in her arms; you were happy in her arms; you knew you were loved in her arms, so she held you, as often and as long as you needed.

Her arms would get tired, her back would hurt, but she held you still because you wanted to be close to her.

8. It broke her heart every time you cried.

There was no sound as sad as your cries or sight as horrible as the tears streaming down your perfect face. She did all in her power to stop you from crying, and when she couldn't stop your tears, her heart would shatter into a million little pieces.

9. She put you first.

She went without food, without showers, and without sleep. She always put your needs before her own. She would spend all day meeting your needs, and by the end of the day, she would have no energy left for herself. But the next day, she would wake up and do it all over again because you meant that much to her.

10. She would do it all again.

Being a mom is one of the hardest jobs anyone can do, and it will take you to your very limits sometimes. You cry, you hurt, you try, you fail, you work, and you learn. But, you also experience more joy than you thought was possible and feel more love than your heart can contain. Despite all the pain, grief, late nights, and early mornings you put your mom through, she would do it all again for you because you are worth it to her.

So, next time you see her, tell your mom thank you; let her know that you love her. She can never hear it too many times.


This article originally appeared on 05.27.16










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Woman says she'd only have kids as the 'dad' because they don't have real 'responsibility'

"After seeing all the unappreciated invisible effort my mother puts in for us, I could not imagine that being my life."

via BippityBoppityBree/TikTok and Ksenia Chernaya/Pexels

TikTok user BippityBoppityBree on why she doesn't want kids.

Bree, a 25-year-old woman in Canada, has gone viral on TikTok for a video explaining the unique reason why she will never have children. She doesn’t want to be a mother and would only have children if she could be the father because they get to be the “cool parent.”

Her ideas about family resonated with many women who believe there are a lot of fathers who don’t carry their own weight. Even though families are becoming more egalitarian, women are still regarded as the default parent in most relationships.

“I would love to be a parent. I would love to be a dad. I don't get that choice—I would have to be a mother—and there is no way in hell I would ever wanna be a mother,” Bree said in a TikTok video.

@bippityboppitybree

Cool aunt and stepmom vibes only #motherhood #feminism #barbiegirl

“I don't want the responsibility of being a mother. I want to be the cool parent, I want to have as little responsibility as possible, and mothers don't get that,” she continued. Bree’s ideas about family stem from her upbringing. “After seeing all the unappreciated invisible effort my mother puts in for us, I could not imagine that being my life!” she wrote in the comments.

“Saving this answer for the next time I am asked that. Thanks,” Bianca P wrote in the comments.

A recent Pew Research study found that in 2022, 29% of marriages were "egalitarian," with husbands and wives each contributing roughly half of the couple's combined earnings. However, women still bore the brunt of the domestic workload, spending more than double the amount of time on housework than their husbands and two hours more per week on caregiving.

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A dad's heartbreaking list of things he learned after his son passed is a must-read.

Richard Pringle, a dad from England, thought he'd have more time with his son, Hughie.

Hughie had a serious brain condition his doctors considered manageable. He was supposed to be fine.

Tragically, the odds struck for the worst and Hughie, 3 years old at the time, suffered a brain hemorrhage last year that he did not survive.

It's a heartbreaking story, but Hughie's memory lives on. Pringle says he's "realised more than ever how precious life is."

He wanted to help other parents appreciate the fleeting and fragile nature of life. So Pringle came up with 10 things he's learned since his son passed.

"I was actually putting my little girl to bed one night and lying with her. It was then I wrote it," he says. "All things I've been thinking about and it just flowed."

The list reads as fond memories of a short life lived to the fullest. Yet it also serves as a powerful wake up call for any of us who might be missing out on the little moments that matter most.

"You can never ever kiss and love too much," Pringle writes. "You always have time. Stop what you're doing and play, even if it's just for a minute. Nothing's that important that it can't wait."

"Make boring things fun," he adds. "Be silly, tell jokes, laugh, smile, and enjoy yourselves. They're only chores if you treat them like that. Life is too short not to have fun."

You can read the full list in his original post:

❤️❤️The 10 Most Important Things I've Learnt Since Losing My Son 🙏1. You can never ever kiss and love too much. 2....

Posted by Richard Pringle on Wednesday, August 23, 2017

The post went viral and struck a nerve with parents everywhere who saw themselves in Pringle's words.

We're all tired from work, stressed from thinking about bills, and constantly scanning the house for what needs to be cleaned or fixed up. It becomes so easy to miss what's right in front of us — moments with our kids that can never be recreated. All the other stuff? It can wait.

It's not just for parents. Everyone could stand to stop and smell the roses, so to speak, a little more often.

"There's beauty in the simple things," Pringle says. "Things that often within our busy destructed lives go unnoticed. There's real beauty in simplicity and I feel we all need to realize this."

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