body acceptance

Body image is a strange thing. Babies aren't born with any opinions about their bodies one way or another, but as we age, we start forming judgments. We might be teased about one or more of our features or we might just absorb messages about beauty standards from the world we live in, but whatever causes them, a huge number people end up dissatisfied with parts of our body by the time we're adults.

But it doesn't have to be that way.

"If you could change one thing about your body, what would it be?"

In a video from Jubilee, 50 people were asked, "If you could change one thing about your body, what would it be?" and the difference between how the adults answered and the kids answered is striking—and telling. The adults listed off the specific features they didn't like and wanted to change—a smaller forehead, smaller ears, bigger eyes, a less puffy face, etc. The kinds of answers most of us would mostly likely give.

But the kids? They heard the question totally differently and answered it in the best way possible.

Watch:

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Of course you would choose to have a mermaid tail or legs like a cheetah if you could change one thing about your body! Of course you'd want wings so you could fly and a shark mouth so you could eat all the things. Teleportation? Put it in me! Extra pointy ears? Heck yes, little elfling.

Or even just…nothing. "I wouldn't change anything. I like my body." That might just be the most revolutionary statement of the 21st century.

Kids aren't immune to being dissatisfied with their bodies, of course. Studies show that body image concerns can begin as early as age 3 and tend to increase year after year, peaking in adolescence. Keeping a child from slipping down the slope of body negativity is something for all parents to watch for. Thankfully, there are some things we can do to help protect kids' acceptance and celebration of their bodies just as they are.

How to develop and maintain a healthy body image

One way is to be careful about how we talk about bodies in general, including our own.

"What we say about our own bodies and other people’s bodies carries significant weight, especially in the presence of our children," pediatrician Mona Amin, M.D., writes on Instagram. "Our words shape their perceptions of self-worth and body image. When we talk about how we don’t want to get in a swimsuit because we haven’t 'lost the baby weight yet' or congratulate someone on looking skinny, we teach our children that there is a 'right' way to look. This subtly, and sometimes not so subtly, can make children start to scrutinize how they look, and can trigger insecurity and low self-esteem."

Another is to speak positively about the things our bodies—all bodies—can do rather than just how they look. Dr. Amin writes that children are borth with a natural sense of acceptance, but a keen observers they will often start to internalize the beliefs and attitudes of the adults in their lives. We can help them develop and maintain a healthy relationship with body image by promoting body neutrality and celebrating diversity in the way people look.

What does that look like in practice? Dr. Amin gives five specific examples:

1. Speaking positively about ourselves and our bodies both alone, with friends, and in front of our children
2. Positive affirmations about our body and what it DOES not how it looks: rewire the brain by feeding positivity where you need it
3. Celebrate qualities about people and kids and not how they look
4. Limit access to social media accounts and media that don’t promote body positivity
5. Not discussing weight in a negative way at doctor’s visits or ever.

More compliments that aren't oriented around appearance, please

It's shocking how many compliments people get have to do with the way they look, and even positive comments can lead to an unhealthy emphasis on appearance. We can all try giving kids compliments like "That was such a smart observation!" or "I love the way you think!" or "Wow, that took hard work—way to go!" rather than focusing on how they look.

Parents on Dr. Amin's Instagram page shared how their kids responded to the question of what they'd change about their body if they could, and they reflect the responses in the video.

"Just asked my son this question and he said he'd change his feet into robot feet and would have robot arms and a robot belly🤖🥹"

"I asked my 5 year old daughter this question, and without any hesitation she said "I wouldn't change anything". By far, one of my most proudest moment as a parent."

"Just asked my three kids: Eldest said “I’d change nothing.” Youngest said “I don’t think I can anything but if I could, I would change everything to always be happiness.” Middle said “I would change madness… so that my body would never be mad anymore.” 🥹🥹🥹 Insecurities are taught. This really touched & convicted me 😭 Thank you for sharing this!"

"My kid said he would turn his body into Godzilla."

"🔥❤️ 6 year old said he would make a clone so they can go to school. 👏👏"

Let's all try to bring back that childhood wonder when we think about our bodies and celebrate the awesome powers they have—or even the imaginary ones they could have.