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Joy

Did you know that at least 10 baby names have been banned in the United States?

What happened to freedom of speech?

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A crying baby.

The names we give to our children can be very personal. They can reflect religious beliefs, family heritage, or have a special meaning attached to them, as in Grace, which means "divine favor," or Eli, which means "ascended." In the United States, people they are protected by the Constitution's First Amendment, freedom of speech, which allows us to name our babies whatever we like.

However, there have been some cases where the courts decided that a particular name is illegal, and, although it is infrequent, it has happened at least 10 times in the country. The most notable banned names are Misteri N-Word, King, Queen, Jesus Christ, III, Santa Claus, Majesty, Adolf Hitler, @, and 1069.

 court, court reporter, legal system, plaintiff, judge, baliff A court reporter taking notes.via Canva/Photos

Why are these 10 names banned in the United States?

III (Roman numerals pronounced “three”)

Thomas Boyd Ritchie III was known by many of his friends simply as III. So, he petitioned the court to have his name changed to Roman numerals. Sadly, a California court rejected the name change because it was a symbol and a number. It’s illegal for people to have numbers in their names because they can’t be entered into state name databases.

Misteri (N-word)

In the California Superior Court case Lee v. Superior Court (1992), Russell Lawrence Lee wanted to change his name to Misteri (N-word). Lee believed that the name could be used to conquer racial hatred. Unfortunately for Lee, the court denied his request, saying the name constituted “fighting words.”

@ (pronounced “at”)

The address symbol, or @, has been banned in multiple jurisdictions because, like a numeral, it cannot be input into state database records.

Jesus Christ

The name of the Christian lord and savior has been banned in several U.S. states based on claims of blasphemy and the possibility of confusion.

 jesus christ, heaven, god, divinity, holy trinity, religion Depiction of Jesus Christ in Heaven.via Canva/Photos

1069

In 1976, the North Dakota Supreme Court told high school teacher Michael Herbert Dengler that he could not change his name to “1069.” “The only way [my] identity can be expressed is 1069. The first character, 1, stands for my concept of nature which manifests itself as one individual among the various forms of life,” he noted. “I stand as a single entity amongst millions of other entities, animate and inanimate. But yet even though I am an entity unto myself, I am part of the whole of life which is one. I am one; life is one; and together we are one.”

He later moved to Minnesota and tried to change his name, but he was rejected again. Neither state allowed people to have numbers as their names.

Santa Claus

In December 1999, Robert William Handley of Ohio filed a petition to change his name to Santa Rob Claus, because he had played the Christmas character for the past 40 years, and was known as “Santa Rob” year-round. The court rejected his petition, saying it was “misleading to the children of the community.” Two years later, the Supreme Court of Utah allowed the name change.

 santa claus, santa rob, banned names, christmas, saint nick A photo of Santa Claus.via Canva/Photos

Majesty, King, Queen

In several states, naming your child after a royal title is illegal to avoid confusion with actual royalty. Does Queen Latifah know this?

Adolf Hitler

If you want to name your child Adolf Hitler, you can’t do it in Texas. After the atrocities he committed in the 1930s and ‘40s, his name has no place in the Lone Star State. However, you can be named Adolf Hitler in New Jersey. Back in 2009, there was a big hubbub when the father of Adolf Hitler Campbell wanted his child’s name written on a birthday cake, and the proprietor of the business refused.

This article originally appeared in May.

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Joy

Nurse asked colleagues to share the most 'unhinged' baby name they ever heard. They delivered.

Imagine meeting twins named "Brock Lee and Callie Flower.”

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Parents…why?

In the latest segment of “unhinged” TikTok trends, a NICU nurse named Victoria asked her fellow colleagues to share names that, as she wrote, “would send the Social Security office into a coma.”

And honestly, who would get exposed to more baffling baby names than nurses? No one. Victoria herself shared with Today that some of her top hits include Dracula, Messiah and Bronze and Gold.

So you can bet the answers were plentiful and, well, unhinged. Check below for our favorites:

“Blessica.”

“Ho’nasty - pronounced honesty…”

“Lucifer ... Oddly enough I took care of another baby named Messiah the same night."

“I work in pediatric dentistry and we have a kid named Sheep."

"L&D nurse here: Phelony."

 terrible baby names, unhinged tiktok, weird baby names, unique baby names, baby names, funny baby names, bay name trends Poor Phelony. Photo credit: Canva

“Dietician in a behavioral speech hospital…kid with oppositional disorder named nemesis."

“Arealtruemiracle. All one word.”

“Candida…I BEG people to research names before giving them to children.”

“Hella Shady.”

“Demon (pronounced duh-mawn)”

“Narwhal ... His name was Narwhal.”

“Frijoles Guacamole. On my life not joking. We secretly keep a bad baby name book to remind us of all the crazy first and middle names.”

“Russell, which isn’t bad except the middle name is Mania. Russell Mania.”

Many of the twin names were especially outrageous:

 terrible baby names, unhinged tiktok, weird baby names, unique baby names, baby names, funny baby names, bay name trends There's gotta some twins out there named Thing One and Thing Two. Poor souls. Photo credit: Canva

“Twins in the NICU — one boy, one girl — named Brock Lee and Callie Flower.”

“Twins: Donwanna and Doneeda…last name Mann.”

“Ya’highness and Ya’majesty. Spelled exactly like that.”

“Twins named Michael and Lil Michael. Mom threatened to beat me up when I laughed. I didn’t know she was serious.”

“Not a nurse but worked on the postpartum floor; twins named Abracadabra and Alacazam.”

“Canon and Crystal. Their last name is Ball.”

And some triplet names for good measure:

“Today, tomorrow, a to’yesterday”

“Teacher here. I had triplets: Lincoln, Mercedes and Bentley.”

As one person noted, these, ahem, unique choices are undoubtedly why some countries have stringent naming laws. Iceland, for instance, has only 4,000 pre-approved baby names. Parents who wish to use a name not on the approved list must petition a three-person naming committee.

 terrible baby names, unhinged tiktok, weird baby names, unique baby names, baby names, funny baby names, bay name trends Did you know the most popular girl's name in Iceland is Emilia? Photo credit: Canva

However, while that kind of guidance might make sense (to protect kids from being on the receiving end of less-than-desirable monikers) some places do have rules that might seem a little outdated to modern sensibilities—forcing names that indicate matching genders, for example.

Even in America, certain names, like Adolf Hitler, III, and Messiah (though clearly some folks are getting away with that last one) are illegal. Still, there are far less regulations, and therefore, stories like this one.

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Family

Some names are music to our ears. Here are the 50 best sounding ones according to science.

Parents filled with baby name anxiety should learn about the Bouba-Kiki effect.

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The science why some names, like Sophia, just sounds better than others.

Choosing a baby name is both fulfilling and precarious. Many parents rack their brains trying to come up with the perfect moniker—one that honors their lineage, where they were born, the personality they’ll hopefully have, or all of the above. Obviously, no easy feat.

To make things more complicated, more and more parents are experimenting with trendy or unique-sounding names, which at best can make their kid stand out, and at worse, leave them a bit isolated.

But maybe relying on science could be a more reliable strategy. As author Bill Sullivan, Ph.D., explained in an article for Psychology Today, parents can incorporate a phenomenon known as the Bouba/Kiki effect to help ensure that a name remains appealing throughout a child’s entire life, simply because it will always be pleasant sounding.

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The term “Bouba/Kiki effect” emerged from a set of experiments in which people were presented with both a round and spikey shape, and asked to link the shapes to either the word “bouba,” or “kiki.” The discovery that people consistently agree that rounded shape = “bouba” and the spiky shape = kiki showed that people inherently make image associations for certain words. Collective synesthesia, if you will.

baby names, Bouba-Kiki effect, best sounding names, best girl names, best boy names, unique baby names, classic baby names, Kiki denotes sharpness, where bouba denotes softness. www.labvanced.com

This concept applies to names as well. Sullivan cited a 2015 study which noted that "bouba," or round, smooth sounding names, like “Bob or Molly,” tend to get associated with "easy-going" personalities. Whereas kiki names, like “Kirk and Kate,” tend to sound more abrupt and could be more likely to be seen as “rude.”

In 2022, Bodo Winter, an associate professor in cognitive linguistics at the University of Birmingham, and his team somewhat cemented this theory, after asking hundreds of participants to listen to a list of the 100 most popular names in the UK and the US, and then analyzing those emotional reactions.

There was a clear winner: "Sophia," originating in Greece and meaning "wisdom." While one could argue that the list, which mainly used only names popular in the UK and the US, was somewhat limiting, the name spans many times and cultures, becoming "Sophie" in France and Germany and even "Safiya" in the Muslim communities.

baby names, Bouba-Kiki effect, best sounding names, best girl names, best boy names, unique baby names, classic baby names, Sophias of the world, rejoice. Photo credit: Canva

History and symbolism aside, what really makes Sophia pop comes down to the “soft start of ‘s,’ a roundness offered by the ‘o,’ and a smooth ending with the ‘ia,’” Winter stated. This combination results in universal pleasantness.

If you’re curious as to whether or not your name is audibly pleasing, below are the 50 top ranking names for both boys and girls in the US, courtesy of My1stYears:

1. Matthew, Sophia

2. Julian, Zoe

3. William, Everly

4. Isiah, Sophia

5. Leo, Riley

6. Levi, Ivy

7. Joseph, Paisley

8. Theo, Willow

9. Isaac, Ellie

10. Samuel, Emily

11. Miles, Evelyn

12. James, Eva

13. Elijah, Elena

14. Luke, Chloe,

15. Noah, Nova

16. Santiago, Penelope

17. Owen, Lucy

18. Logan, Lily

19. Liam, Olivia

20. Roman, Naomi

21. Ryan, Emma

22. Cooper, Natalie

23. Jack, Sofia

24. Maverick, Eleanor

25. Anthony, Violet

26. Ezekiel, Bella

27. Carter, Luna

28. Benjamin, Ella

29. Lucas, Victoria

30. Henry, Isabella

31. Jacob, Maya

32. Lincoln, Natalia

33. Mason, Amelia

34. Nathan, Savannah

35. Asher, Charlotte

36. Jackson, Stela

37. Andrew, Hazel

38. Cameron, Athena

39. Alexander, Maria

40. Theodore, Autumn

41. Adam, Kennedy

42. Gabriel, Aurora

43. Kingston, Alice

44. Daniel, Aria

45. David, Harper

46. Hunter, Serenity

47. Dylan, Nora

48. Muhammed, Grace

49. Sebastian, Elizabeth

50. Adrian, Hannah

It probably goes without saying that our own personal preferences, among many other factors, might still influence what sounds appeal to us more (I for one prefer spiky names with a little gusto) but using the simple rules of linguistics could be an interesting, and perhaps less daunting, way for parents to choose a name that’s truly timeless.

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Joy

Woman with unfortunate initials upset she can never wear monogrammed clothing

Some other folks responded that they have it worse.

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A woman who is frustrated with her name.

It’s fair to blame parents if they give their child a name and the initials spell out something unseemly or embarrassing. They should have considered this before giving the child the name. However, you can’t blame someone with funny initials after getting married because no one will reject the love of their life for having a last name that starts with the wrong letter.

A woman shared that she can’t stand her initials because she can’t wear monogrammed clothing. "[My initials] are the bane of my existence, and I can never have traditional monogramming (first, last, middle) without it being a sandwich." Yes, her initials, in the traditional monogram form, are BLT. They are a tasty option for lunch but probably not something you’d want on a fancy necklace or bathrobe. She also refuses to eat the sandwich. "Raw tomatoes are disgusting to me personally,” she adds.

Why is it that in traditional monogram form, a married woman’s initials are different than if she was writing them first, middle, and last? “A monogrammed gift for a woman should include her first, middle, and last initial or, if she is married, her first, maiden name, and married name initials. Traditionally, a woman's monogram is presented in first, last, and middle initial order,” The Monogram merchant writes.

For example, Jacqueline Bouvier Kennedy would have a traditional monogram of JKB.



Some commenters shared their initials, and many were worse than BLT.

"My friend's is AIDS, so dont worry, i remember in secondary school having to sew our initials on pillows for home economics. I felt bad for her."

"I’m D.M.B. - all I’m missing is the U."

"Mine are TB.... just as unappealing haha."

"My initials are BS, so don't feel bad. I get cracked on all the time."

"Hubs initials are ET. Cue 'ET phone home,' circa the '80s from all his so called friends at work."



"My initials are RAD, lol."

"I knew a girl with the initials PMS, I think food is better than that."

"Mine happen to spell 'ELF', and I hated it as a kid. Now I embrace it, lol."

"My brother’s are R.A.T. He kinda embraced it, an animal lover and all."

"I'm APE lol."



It was once believed that having unfortunate initials meant more than suffering the occasional embarrassment—they could take years off your life. In 1999, a study found that men with positive initials, such as WOW or JOY, lived 4.5 years longer than those with neutral initials, while those with negative initials, such as DIE or ROT, died 2.8 years later.

The idea was that people with negative initials subconsciously think less of themselves, which could lead to an unhealthy lifestyle compared to someone with positive initials. However, six years later, that study was debunked by a subsequent study that found there is “no persuasive biological theory of how longevity should be significantly affected by initials."

Pamela Redmond Satran, author of "Baby Names Now," says we should still consider initials when naming children.

"Every conventional naming book gives the guideline, 'Don't forget to look at the initials,'" Satran said, according to CBS News. "Even if the second study contradicts the first, and having bad initials is not going to shorten your life span, it could make what there is of your life less pleasant. And who wants to foist that on innocent children?"

This article originally appeared in January.

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