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Autistic woman praises parents who dress their disabled children in age appropriate clothes

"Let them have drip."

Photo credit: Canva

Woman praise parents of disabled teens who dress them their age

It's not uncommon to see teens and young adults who are cognitively or physically disabled in clothing that looks like it's more appropriate for elementary aged children. Of course there are different reasons for this, such as the teen preferring to wear younger clothes or it being the person's special interest at the moment. But sometimes it can be that the adults around them still view them as an elementary aged child though they are chronologically and sometimes developmentally much older.

Recently, Clare, an autistic woman took to social media to express her excitement over stumbling across a mother's page that features her nonverbal autistic teenage son. Clare wasn't excited simply because the mom was documenting her life with an autistic child, she took note of something she doesn't see often.

In the background behind the woman's video is a picture of a teenage boy dressed in a pair of of skinny jeans, a Nike zip-up and a blue puffer jacket. By all appearances he looks like a typical teen boy heading to school or the mall but that's what caught Clare's eye.

Style Swag GIF by ComplexGiphy

"So this post was saying they have a non-verbal autistic son and that they dress them like this and I just...I love when parents of special needs children understand that they are still people, that probably wouldn't want to dress like children for their entire life. I love when you see special needs parents of teenagers that dress their kids like teenagers or special needs parents of adults that dress their kids like adults and not just someone repressed in time," the woman shares.

Later she further explains that she appreciates when parents dress their children with special needs like they think they would want to dress and not how they think they should dress due to their disability. Clare says, "cause I see so often teenagers that are special needs that are dressed in like clothing in a style that looks similar to like a four or five year old still. I just love when parents make that effort to try to dress their child in a way that they think that their child would be comfortable even if they cannot express how they would wanna dress."

@lacroix_goth #greenscreen parents that give their children a sense of style and self even if they can’t for themselves 😮💨 the best G_twins_baby is the original post and mom btw!! #fyp #foryou #foryoupage #specialneedmom #specialneedschild #fashion #autistic #nonverbal ♬ original sound - Clare♉️

The teenager that inspired the video praising his mom is 16-year-old Gi'Avonnie-year-old Gi'Avonnie who is always dressed like he could walk onto the set of any high school tv show as the new cool kid. In the caption of the post that caught Clare's attention reads, "it's all about aura when you're nonverbal I won't talk but you will feel the vibe."

One commenter shares with Clare about a woman who became the caregiver of her adult God brother with autism who has since had a "glow up" due to being seen as an adult. John West, aka Mr. West is a man in his mid-thirties who is now under the guardianship of his God sister Des. Prior to Mr. West coming under the care of Des he was denied treats like soda, had severe dental hygiene struggles and seemed to not have much filling his days but things quickly changed with his new caregiver.

@g_twins_baby It’s all about Aura when you’re nonverbal😅 I won’t talk but you will feel the vibe #autismmom #nonverbalautism #autism #bekind ♬ original sound - shah

Since having a voice in his choices, Mr. West not only revamped his entire style but has since started college, started dating and even took his first solo trip. The man appears to be enjoying all of his new freedoms and since Des has been caring for him, he now has his own place right next door to hers.

People seem to agree that teens and adults with disabilities should be dressed and treated like their numerical age whenever appropriate with one person writing, "I think if the child WANTS to dress like their special interest them go for it. But if they don’t care, dress them age appropriate."

"My boss has a kid with autism and he uses an ipad to talk (acc device) and she is slowly putting small curse words since hes getting older i loveee it," another writes.

@waxesbydes John had an amazing 1st day back🫶🏽 #travel #familytime #caregiver #love #travelingwithkids #autisticadult #autismoftiktok #adultwithautism #autistic #autism #autismfamily #familyfun #family #autistictiktok #asd #autismawareness #autismacceptance ♬ original sound - Des❤️

Someone else says, "for real! disabled people deserve dignity. i wish it was more normalized for parents to treat disabled people as presumed competent but with reasonable accommodation."

One person reminds others, "special needs is a spectrum. Some are at the accurate mental age and others aren’t. Many special needs clients are still interested in “kid” things, many aren’t."

Everyone's personality is different and special needs children, teens and adults are no different, this means some teens may only want to wear Disney princess outfits while others want typical high school drip. Some adults may prefer sweatpants and Sponge Bob t-shirts while others want to wear styles that feel closer to their age. Others may not be able to communicate how they want to dress or to be treated at all and rely on their caregiver to decide. No matter what the personal style or developmental level may be, the focus for all seems to be what's best for the child which is what the majority of parents care about the most.

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Hundreds of parks and playgrounds have added these colorful picture boards for autistic kids

Communication boards for nonverbal autism are a huge game changer.

Smarty Symbols

Communication boards help nonverbal kids communicate at the park.

Taking your kids to the playground is supposed to be fun.

You chase them around, hold them up on the monkey bars, follow them down the slide — it's a hoot!

(Or, if you're exhausted and overstimulated like so many parents, you take a little quiet time to scroll your phone on the bench while your child plays happily — there's zero shame in doing so.)

But for parents of children with autism or other special needs — especially when those kids are nonverbal — a trip to the park can be filled with stress and anxiety.

Being in an outside environment that you can't control and having few ways to clearly communicate with your child is stressful and even dangerous.

Now more and more communities are installing special picture boards that make playgrounds and other public spaces more accessible to nonverbal kids.

Autism communication boards, more formally known as Picture Exchange Communication System (PECS) boards, are a game-changer.

These larges signs feature colorful pictures and icons that help children — and people of all ages — with verbal challenges communicate.

Smarty Symbols

Typically, you'll find them at playgrounds and public parks, where the boards might have pictures corresponding to things a child might want to do like Climb, or Slide.

Smarty Symbols

There may be pictures for Friend or for Share, or for things kids might want like Food, Water, or to go to the Bathroom.

Kids are able to point at the little logos to communicate efficiently and clearly with their caretakers or even with other kids.

Smarty Symbols

For children with budding language skills, the boards often include a full alphabet so kids can spell out words by pointing or touching.

What's amazing is that these boards not only make playgrounds and parks safer and more inclusive for autism families, they actually open up a gateway for nonverbal kids to play with other children.

Parents may be well-versed in some of the nonverbal communication methods their kids use, but other children at the park might not be. These boards make it easier for a child with autism to find a friend to go down the slide with them or go on the climbing wall together.

As an added bonus, public PECS boards invoke a lot of curiosity which helps kids and even adults learn more about folks who may have different ways of communicating.

And the boards aren't just for nonverbal children with autism! They're a great and fun tool for younger children who are just learning how to read and speak, empowering them to communicate and interact more fully with the world around them.

At home, children with autism often have smaller versions of these boards — or they have special tablets loaded with tools to help them communicate.

But out in the chaos of the real-world and without these tools, communications breakdowns are a major risk.

With 1 in every 36 children having autism (a number that's been on the rise) according to the CDC, these boards are a crucial public health investment for towns across the country.

PECS boards in public spaces is an idea that's really catching on. There are dozens of news stories from the last year or two of counties or town in the U.S. and UK, in particular, installing these boards.

Union County in New Jersey added boards to several of its most popular parks.

Teddy Bear Park in Lake Placid got a custom board earlier this year.

And Oyster Bay in Long Island, NY added communication boards to nearly a dozen of its parks and beaches!

You can even find highly customized boards in places like school libraries, school nurse offices, or sports fields — all with special pictures and communications tools that are suited to that particular environment.

Smarty Symbols, one of the main manufacturers and advocates for the use of these boards, has shipped hundreds of boards since 2022.

The prevalence of PECS or autism communication boards in public spaces is a truly amazing sign of progress

Our understanding of nonverbal autism and our willingness to make public space more inclusive has come a long way.

Therapy designed to encourage or even "force" nonverbal children with autism to speak is highly controversial, and there's a lot of debate over its ethics and effectiveness.

But what's clear is that tools like picture boards and communication boards do not delay or hinder anyone's ability to learn to read or speak.

They're an extra tool that keeps kids safe and happy — which is exactly what every kid should feel when they're at the playground with their family.

autism
Health

Short eye-opening video shows the world through the eyes of a kid with autism

"I’m not naughty, I’m autistic."

Photo pulled from YouTube video

What kids with autism see.

Imagine everything you'd experience while strolling through a mall — the smells, the sights, the things to touch...

Now imagine all of those feelings and sensations times, like, a hundred.

For many people with autism, overstimulation is their reality.

Being over- or undersensitive when processing sensory information (like sights and smells) is common for people on the autism spectrum.

So an everyday thing that many people might not even notice at the mall, like the spraying of a perfume bottle...

overstimulation, autism, spraying perfume

Autism and coping with overstimulation.

Photo pulled from YouTube video.

... can be overwhelming for someone with autism.

To Jo Wincup, whose 15-year-old son, Ben, has autism, this reality hits close to home.

“Four years ago, my son had a meltdown in a shopping center after becoming overloaded by the crowds, bright lights, and smells. He started kicking me, shouting, and swearing. We tried to get him outside to help him calm down, but the people [lining up] for buses just stared, some even said really hurtful things. This upset Ben even more. He ran off into the bushes and refused to come out. I just wanted to cry, for the ground to swallow us up."

The National Autistic Society is hoping to give viewers a peek into this reality with a new and gripping PSA.

Seen through the eyes of a boy with autism, the video by the U.K.-based group takes viewers through a shopping center, allowing them to experience what living on the spectrum can feel like.

After he's overwhelmed by his surroundings and struggling with his mother (as onlookers gape at what appears to be a child acting out), the boy explains to viewers: "I’m not naughty, I’m autistic."

cafeteria, judgmental, awkward

How can we understand what autism feels like?

Video pulled from YouTube video.

It's important that we all understand what autism can feel like so that we can build a more empathetic world.

Although a large majority of people have heard of autism, a very small number of people actually understand how living on the spectrum can affect behavior. Many kids aren't necessarily naughty; they're dealing with a condition most of us can't experience firsthand.

A new report from the National Autistic Society found that 87% of families say people stare at their child who has autism, and 84% of people on the spectrum say others perceive them as "strange." Unfortunately, this contributes to the reason why nearly 8 in 10 folks with autism report feeling socially isolated.

"It isn’t that the public sets out to be judgmental towards autistic people," Mark Lever, chief executive of the organization, said in a statement, noting the research provided "shocking" results.

"They tell us that they want to be understanding but often just don’t ‘see’ the autism. They see a ‘strange’ man pacing back and forth in a shopping center, or a ‘naughty’ girl having a tantrum on a bus, and don’t know how to respond."

It doesn't have to be this way, though.

The more we all understand autism, the more people on the spectrum can feel OK about being themselves.

“Autism is complex and autistic people and their families don’t expect or want people to be experts," Lever explained. But a "basic understanding could transform lives."

Watch The National Autistic Society's PSA below:


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Good Samaritans save a kidnapped boy after following up on an AMBER Alert

The boy's father was delivering food when he was car-jacked.

via ABC 7 News

Reagan Dunn and Yenni Lu located Justin Chan after an Amber Alert.

Since being established in Texas in 1996, Amber Alerts have been implemented in all 50 states, the District of Columbia, the Commonwealth of Puerto Rico, and the U.S. Virgin Islands and have been incredibly effective at preventing child abductions.

As of December 31, 2023, over 1200 children have been successfully through the program, which was named after Amber Hagerman, who was abducted and murdered in Arlington, Texas, 28 years ago.

The alerts are delivered through TV broadcasts, radio, text messages and cable TV, deputizing the general public to help find a kidnapped child immediately after they’ve been reported missing. Back in February, an autistic child who was abducted from his father was recovered in under 3 hours after 2 friends took action.

It all started on February 13, 2024 when Kim Chan was delivering food in downtown Long Beach, California. He left the car running while he made his delivery and while he was gone, a carjacker stole his car. To make a terrible situation worse, his 4-year-old son, Justin, was in the backseat. After the carjacker drove away, the father contacted the police and the California Highway Patrol issued an Amber Alert.

Right around that time, Reagan Dunn and Yenni Lu, both 20, from nearby Huntington Beach, were cruising downtown Long Beach and just “hanging out” when they received the alert on their phones. “We had nothing else to do so, we were like, ‘Hey, let’s go look,’” Dunn told the Long Beach Post.

A few minutes later, they drove past a Honda Accord parked in front of an outlet mall that matched the description in the alert. They checked the incense plate and it was a match. “I thought maybe I was seeing things,” Dunn said.

The women quickly called 911 and stayed by the car, waiting for officers to arrive.

By 8:10 that night, Justin was reunited with his parents. "The vehicle was located by two Good Samaritans who found the car and immediately called 9-1-1. We would like to thank them for this act of heroism in finding this young boy," the Long Beach Police Department said in a statement.

The Long Beach Police later identified the carjacking suspect by reviewing footage from security cameras in the area. After stealing the car, he promptly abandoned it at the outlet mall located a few blocks away from where it was stolen. Timothy Wood, 34, who is experiencing homelessness, was booked on suspicion of kidnapping, child endangerment, and vehicle theft and his bail was set at $100,000.

Dunn and Lu’s heroic act to help save the young boy is another great example of California's successful Amber Alert program. Since 2002, it has been activated over 320 times in the state, involving over 380 victims and over 97% have been safely recovered. “The program definitely works, and it's getting better every year,” the California Highway Patrol says on its website.

The Amber Alert program is an excellent reminder that when you call on people to help in a crisis, more often than not, someone will always step up and do what’s right.

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