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Mom reacts perfectly to daughter who disinvited a friend from a trip because of her weight

She didn’t want the girl to “ruin” her photos of the trip.

via Cottonboro Studios/Pexels

A mother confronts her daughter for judging her friend's weight.

A 42-year-old mother wondered whether she did the right thing by disciplining her 18-year-old daughter, Abby, who disinvited a friend from vacation because of her weight. The mother asked people on Reddit for their opinion. For some background, Abby had struggled with her weight for many years, so she went to her mother for help. The two set up a program where Abby was given a reward for every milestone she achieved.

“Four months ago, she asked that I don't get her any more rewards and add it up to her birthday gift, and for her gift she wants a vacation I will pay for, for her and her friends instead of the huge party I had promised for her 18th. I said OK,” the mother wrote. So, instead of a series of small gifts, Abbey wanted one large one, a vacation with two of her friends. The vacation would also celebrate Abby’s 18th birthday. The mother agreed and booked the trip for the 3 girls.

“Fast forward to last weekend, we started preparing for her vacation,” the mother wrote. “I called the other two girls' parents to confirm the girls would be and learned Abby's best friend Betty isn't going. Betty loves traveling and was looking forward to the vacation, so I asked why. Apparently, Abby uninvited her because ‘she is too chubby to look good in pictures.’”

When the mother approached Abby about the situation, she doubled down on her comments to Betty. “I calmly talked to Abby and reminded her how Betty would feel being left out for such a reason, and she went off with, 'I didn't work so hard for this vacation so my pictures will be ruined,'" the mother wrote.

Abby then asked Betty to contact her mom and say that she decided not to go on the trip because she wasn’t feeling well. Betty refused to lie, and Abby sent her a “ton of hateful texts and body-shaming insults.” Betty shared screenshots of the texts to the mother, and she promptly canceled the entire vacation.

Now, Abby’s father, who shares 50-50 custody with the mother, is livid, and Abby won’t speak to the mother. The mom asked the Reddit AITA forum to see if she was in the wrong, and the commenters overwhelmingly said she did the right thing. "Some of my friends agree on my approach, while others think I should have put my daughter first,” the mother said.

The most popular commenter was short and to the point.

"Teaching your daughter to not be a horrible human being IS putting her first," Due_Laugh_3851 wrote. "I commend your strength and parenting skills. This was the right thing to do and would've been hard to do. Well done, you deserve to go on the holiday yourself," Loud_Wallaby737 added.

"... uninviting someone because you only want skinny people in your pictures is a disgusting attitude frankly. Sorry, I just don't find a nicer word for it. I am totally with you that this needs to have consequences, and while I'm very much against breaking promises, I do believe this is an exception. Like you said, your daughter knows what it feels like. She (but anyone really) should be supportive of friends wanting to lose weight if that is the case and if it isn't they she should just mind her own business body," SensitiveSires wrote.

One of the few people who thought she was in the wrong believed that the mother set her daughter up for failure.

"[You're wrong] for giving your daughter who is a child rewards for weight loss. Her behavior of value based on weight shows she likely has developed disordered eating patterns and attitudes and this will cause her a lifetime of pain," tamtheprogram wrote.

The silver lining to the story is that many people who commented said that even though her daughter did something very hurtful, she’s still a teenager and there’s a chance she’ll realize the error of her ways.

"The daughter is just a teenager, she still has a lot of time to learn and grow up. Writing off her entire future as a mean girl when it’s very rare to be the same exact person you were at 18 as you grow up is a lot," Stephapeaz wrote.


This article originally appeared on 9.18.23

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Teen shares why he won't change his 'girly' name even though his parents have serious regrets

His parents want him to choose a more "professional" name before college, but he won't have it.

via Canva

A teen fights with his parents to keep his name.

As parents age, they may regret the names they give their children. This is especially true as they get older and have to enter the professional world, where studies show unusual names are a hindrance. However, should they have the right to change their child’s name as a teen if their child isn’t into it?

That’s the crux of a recent viral story on Reddit’s AITA forum.

A 16-year-old boy who goes by the username 1ft2nyn shared how, for the past 6 years, his parents have been nudging him to use a different name, but he isn’t interested. “My parents started to regret my name when I was maybe 10 … [They] started sometimes calling me by my middle name and only stopping when I told them it was weird and I liked my first name. When I was 13, they asked me if I ever went by a nickname and I said no,” he wrote.

The boy’s name is Sunny, which was intentionally spelled with a u, the common girl’s spelling, instead of an o, as in the traditional boy’s spelling of “Sonny.” Sunny says his parents chose the name as a middle finger to their parents, who had insisted on having a hand in naming their previous kids.

names, baby names, name regretA teen fights with his parents to keep his name.via Canva

A year ago, the parents asked Sunny if he wanted to change his name to something “more adult” to spare him the expense of changing the name on his diploma when he graduates college. But Sunny wouldn’t budge. “I was like, ‘Oh, I guess if people want that, it makes sense.’ Then I said, ‘It must suck to hate your name.’

Six months ago, Sunny’s parents said he looked a lot like a “James” and asked if he liked the name Luke. Three months ago, they tried again and presented him with 3 new name options, and he declined to make the change. “They said they feel like they named me as a big f*** you to their families but felt bad that I had such an unserious name for a man. I told them I didn't want to change my name and I always loved the way they talked about finding my name,” Sunny wrote.

It’s interesting to note that the parent's final appeal to Sunny was as much about their own feelings as his. “They said they really didn't want to live with the guilt,” Sunny wrote. “I told them how I feel about my name is more important now. They told me I should at least think of their feelings and that I should consider the future and whether I'll be taken seriously.”

names, baby names, name regretA teen fights with his parents to keep his name.via Canva

So, is Sunny wrong for refusing to change his name to appease his parents and possibly make his professional life less challenging? The commenters on the post overwhelmingly supported Sunny for standing strong and keeping his name.

“Sonny or Sunny, regardless how you spell it is a perfectly normal name for a male. An identity is intertwined with a name and it's hard to separate the two. You, and you alone, are the person that should decide if you want to change your name,” Naisfurious wrote. “It sounds like your parents are more concerned about their feelings regarding your name than your feelings. that name is yours, you're your own person, and if you don't want to change your name because you like it, then don't. those are their feelings to live with, and putting them on you as a child is unfair and weird. I also have a weather name and I still love it, and i'm almost thirty. More power to you!” Anxious-Nobody-4966 added.

Because Sunny isn’t an adult, there is a slight chance that his parents could change his name without his consent. Some commenters said Sunny should take a firm stand and let his parents know there will be consequences for pushing too hard on this issue.

“Make it clear to your parents that if they were to do that there would be serious long term consequences for your relationship and that you will NEVER answer to or acknowledge that name under any circumstances and will have your name changed back the day you turn 18,” CelticMusebooks wrote. “Let them know the harder they push, the more stubborn you’ll be and if they don’t watch out, their grandson is going to be sunny jr. Whether you actually have a jr. is up to you, but it might help shut them up for now,” RezCuong added.

Ultimately, Sunny only has 2 more years left to fend off his parents and keep his name. The post he made on Reddit received over 2,000 comments from people who have his back, so it has to have given him the shot in the arm he needs to keep standing firm. This post is a great example of people pulling hard for someone to lean into positivity instead of settling for a boring name that looks good on a resume.

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Husband is certain wife’s baby name will cause too much pain for their child. Is he wrong?

"It's going to cause him major problems with passports and ID as well as job and college applications."

via Nathan Cowley/Pexels

A father can't handle the name his wife chose for the baby.

It’s one thing to debate with your spouse over giving your child a name that is so unique it could cause them trouble. It’s another to fight with your spouse over giving your child a name that is so incredibly common it’s used as a placeholder when an unidentified man has passed away.

This was the problem a Reddit user (The_Doeberman), whose last name is Doe, faced when his wife wanted to name their baby boy after her grandfather, John.

“My wife is six months pregnant and wants to name our future son after her grandfather, who died of cancer in September. His name was John,” the husband wrote on the AITA forum

“I liked her grandfather, and I know he and my wife were very close, but I won't even consider it, not even for our son's middle name,” he continued. “I feel that's just setting him up for a world of problems, especially when he grows up and has to apply for jobs. Nobody's going to believe ‘John Doe’ is his real name.”

The wife thought that the husband was being difficult for vetoing the name and claimed he was “exaggerating” the issues the child would face.

But he has a pretty strong argument. The name John Doe is synonymous with the unclaimed dead body that someone finds in a roadside motel in the middle of nowhere or an anonymous victim of trauma that can’t be named in court documents. It’s also often used as a placeholder, which could cause the child problems when applying for college or a job.



There is no exact answer to why John Doe was chosen to represent the “everyman,” but it has been used in the UK for hundreds of years. It’s believed because John Doe was a popular name at the time. Later, in the US, unidentified females would come to be known as Jane Doe.

The husband used Reddit’s AITA page to ask whether he was in the wrong and the commenters were overwhelmingly supportive of him.

One commenter thought that "John Doe" was a bad idea but gave a solution that could work for the wife. “People will think it's a fake name. It's going to cause him major problems with passports and ID as well as job and college applications. He may have issues with medical stuff etc.,” they wrote. Instead, they suggested using an alternative version of “John” from another language.

“As an example only: Look for other languages' version of John. For example Eoin is the Irish way of spelling Owen. Eoin in itself is the Irish version of John…” they wrote.


Another commenter was blunt about their objection.

“I'm not superstitious, but I'd feel uncomfortable having a kid whose name basically stands for ‘found dead in the park, stab wound to the chest, no ID,’” they added.

One commenter noted all of the legal troubles that could come with having the name John Doe.

“I imagine a lifetime of getting stopped by the TSA for enhanced screening, of job applications being tossed for being fake and just everything being harder than it should be because you have a fake name,” they wrote. “If giving him the grandfather's name is so important, why not give him the grandpa's middle name?”

In the end, it's touching for a mother to name their newborn son after her grandfather, but according to the father and a legion of people online, “John Doe” simply carries too much baggage and would be more of a hindrance than a tribute. The good news is that there are many ways that the wife can pay homage to her grandfather that won’t make her son’s life more difficult.

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Woman bailed on her friend for being 30 minutes late to lunch. Was she right?

"I assumed you weren't coming, so I went home."

via Oleg Ivanv/Unsplash and Michael Lensink/Unsplash

Perpetually late friends can be annoying.

We all have a friend who seems to live in their own time zone and is never punctual for anything. This can become a headache after a while because you always have to wait to get your table at a restaurant, or you may miss the first few minutes of a movie.

After a while it becomes harder to let them off the hook for being late because it's just so darn inconsiderate.

A 32-year-old female Reddit user named Danceofthefireys had it up to her neck with her friend, a male who’s also 32, for constantly being late. So, after he was late for a lunch date, she took drastic measures to prove her point. But did she go too far?

“This friend is always late to everything. Being late is fine; however, in this day and age of mobile phones, I have strong feelings that one should try to notify a person if they are running significantly late to a date/meeting,” she wrote in a post on the AITA forum.

But after being 30 minutes late to lunch, he didn’t text or call to let her know what was happening. Of course, she could have texted him but she didn’t feel it was her responsibility. “I got to the café at 12 pm, which was the arranged time,” she continued. “I sat at a table by myself, surrounded by the hustle and bustle of the busy café. At 12.30 pm, my friend had not arrived. I'd received no text, so I simply left and went home. At no point did I try to text or ring him to see where he was/how far away he was.”

After she left the café, he texted her at 12:38 pm, saying, “I’m here, where are you.” But the woman refused to turn around and return to the café. “I assumed you weren't coming, so I went home,” she replied. After she got home, her husband said she should have at least “rang him” before leaving, but she didn’t.

“Is she wrong for leaving her friend for being over 30 minutes late? Most of the commenters said she did the right thing. “Your friend is rude and clearly values their time more than your own. You shouldn’t have to chase them up and accommodate them as if they were a child. You’ve laid down a boundary now,” Sleepy_Felines wrote.

But some believe she lost the moral high when she didn’t text him before leaving.

“You were fine until you didn't tell him you were leaving. You clearly wanted to punish him for always being late. Two wrongs don't make a right folks,” Narrauko wrote.

One commenter, KatzKat, supported the woman with a clear and simple point: “You shouldn't have to manage someone else's time.”

According to popular opinion on Reddit, it seems that she wasn’t wrong to leave, but should have communicated with him via text before making her exit. If she faces a similar situation in the future, she can follow the advice given by Leah Campbell and Bethany Juby, PsyD, in an article on Psych Central, where they explain how to deal with people who are chronically late.

“If you’re dealing with someone who is perpetually late, communicate this to them ahead of time — let them know you will be leaving after a certain amount of time has passed,” Campbell wrote. “Still, try not to sound accusatory. Consider acknowledging that you two have different personalities. You’re not trying to change them, but you need to set time boundaries for yourself because you can’t afford or don’t want to wait any longer.”

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