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Joy

15 people share the one sentence they'll never forget because it completely changed their lives

"Never try to hate anyone; often they don't care, and you're left doing all the work."

A woman having a revelation.

There’s nothing quite like having a breakthrough moment. When you hear something that completely reframes how you view a relationship or challenging life situation that helps you move past the barrier and into a new headspace, it can be exhilarating. It’s like scratching an itch that you didn’t know you had.

"Breakthrough is that moment when frustration, struggling, fear, worry, or anxiety disappears,” famed personal development coach Tony Robbins once said. “It's a moment of insight, recognition about who you are, and the realization that you are more than the moment. It's a radical, massive improvement in the quality of your life, and as a result, all those you have the privilege to touch."

A Redditor on the Confession subforum asked people to share the “one sentence that completely changed their life,” and they received over 1,000 responses from people who heard the right wisdom at the right time and never forgot it. These sentences are powerful truths that helped people stuck in a rut realize they had the power to change or move on.

advice, breakthroughs, confessions, wisdom, moments, thinking, adviceA mom consoling her daughter.via Canva/Photos

Here are 15 sentences that completely changed people’s lives.

1. Sometimes when you’re in a dark place, you think you’ve been buried, but you’ve actually been planted.

"That's a spin on an old saying, 'They tried to bury us, but they didn't realise we were seeds.'"

2. Never try to hate anyone; often they don't care, and you're left doing all the work.

"Said by a friend of mine at a very critical time in my life. It's been said in other ways, but that one stuck with me for the last 35+ years."

"Makes me think of this gem: Never get in a fight with a pig. You both get covered in sh*t but the pig enjoys it."

"Hate corrodes the vessel it's carried in."

3. Have you had a bad day, or did you have a bad 5 minutes that you let ruin your day?

"I love this one explained with money. If I gave you $100, then I stole 5, would you burn/throw away the rest?"

"I need someone to remind me of this sometimes! I'm not neurotypical and I can tell sometimes that when things can't go to my plan or agreed schedule it can be like a monkey wrench in a gear and just PAUSE my life in a way I hate sometimes."


advice, breakthroughs, confessions, wisdom, moments, thinking, advice, couchA woman upset on the couch.via Canva/Photos

4. People are quick to accept that the smallest change in the past can dramatically change the present, yet refuse to accept that the smallest action today can completely change the world.

"Hindsight’s 20/20 as they say, and it’s easier to know the difference between the outcome compared to the present. Whereas our current actions, we really have no way of knowing how it’ll affect the future, as there are so many other variables that could affect things, and we can’t see into the future."

5. Don't set yourself on fire to keep others warm

"This reminds of an African proverb I heard: Beware the naked man who offers you clothes."

6. I love you enough to let you hate me.

"My mom told me once during a heated argument in my teens, 'I love you enough to let you hate me.' Powerful."

7. Never break two laws at once; that's how you draw attention to yourself.

“If you have a body in the trunk, make sure you use your turn signals.”

"My dad was in law enforcement and told me that was how they often caught people. An example he used was at night when someone forgot to turn off their high beams there was a reasonable chance they might be an impaired driver."


8. Nothing is going to be different unless you do things differently.

"Nothing changes if nothing changes!"

"I've tried nothing and it didn't work!"

9. Living well is the best revenge!

"Instead of making yourself miserable stewing over the past, improve your life and make yourself happy."

"For the people that hate you, or just generally dislike you, there's nothing worse than seeing you be happy. If someone hurts you on purpose, you don't need to try and hurt them back, if you become obsessed with them, then they've won, but being happy and leading a good life is the best revenge you could have, because they'll hate to see it. If you can't love yourself for you, love yourself just out of spite towards the people who would bring you down."

10. Don't let perfect be the enemy of good enough.

"This is a good one in the professional world. I give this advice to my direct reports often. Move onto the next great thing."

11. Acceptance is the answer

"Big Book AA: Acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing or situation—some fact of my life—unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment."

"It changed my life… I was so consumed with everything that was wrong around me. It made me start looking at and adjusting myself instead. I can only control me. "

self acceptance, self love, self-care, peace, understandingA woman at peace with herself.via Canva/Photos

12. You never know what someone is going through, always be kind.

"Always react with kindness. It costs you nothing and can make most situations much better."

13. Righty tighty, lefty loosey.

"Lives rent free in my head and has helped me every damn day of my life! Hahaha!"

"Especially when putting together furniture, saved me hours with allen keys."

14. The price of procrastination is the life you could have lived.

"Love this one!"

15. Let today be the day you learn the grace of letting go, and the power of moving on.

"I needed this thank you."

Joy

Men who are 30 and over share the 15 life lessons younger guys must learn early

"Don't let people treat you poorly. Not your girlfriend, not your buddy, not your family."

A man in his 50s with some good advice.

It’s impossible for anyone who has reached middle age to look back on their early 20s and not believe they squandered some of their precious resources, whether the vitality of their youth or the seemingly infinite time they thought they had on this earth. But you don’t learn to truly appreciate these things until one day, you want to go to bed at 9 pm, and time has sped up so rapidly that you’re having a hard time catching up.

Countless people have tried to tell younger people to appreciate the vitality of their youth, and by making good decisions at a young age, you’ll be much happier when you get older. However, that advice is usually ignored because most people don’t have the foresight to appreciate the wisdom we accumulate with age. It seems that, sadly, most of us have to learn our lessons the hard way.

For young people out there willing to entertain the idea that they don’t know everything, a group of men who are 30 and over on Reddit shared the lessons that “every guy” should learn early on. To sum it up, they believe that young people should understand that time flies fast and they should always have one eye on their future selves. They should also learn that being a good guy is better than being a hothead and that you are not invincible, no matter how powerful you feel. It’s also important to stand up for yourself and have integrity because your character will follow you wherever you go.

great advice, wisdom, helpful advice, gen x men, gen z men, positive masculinityA man in his 20s upset.via Canva/Photos

Here are 15 lessons men 30 and up think every guy should learn early.

1. Make sure people treat you right

"Don't let people treat you poorly. Not your girlfriend, not your buddy, not your family."

"Absolutely. It's a skill to carry yourself in a way where you are respected. People learn quick who they can talk down on and who not to mess with. If you speak up for yourself, people are more likely to keep their opinions to themselves."

2. You're not young forever (although you may think it)

"You are only young for a period of your life. You are actually 'older' for most of your life so make sure your decisions take that into consideration."

"I didn't feel like an adult until I was 26-28. That's when it really hit me. I feel 26 until I speak to an actual 26-year-old."

"You'll still feel 26 in your 40s and 50s until you try to do physical stuff like you did at that age."

3. Admit your mistakes

"Admit when you make a mistake and learn from it. And don’t try to hide them either. I’ve avoided so much conflict in my adult life by being able to go to someone and say, 'I need you to know I made a mistake, and I’m going to correct it,' or else, 'I messed up, and I need help.' Trying to blame someone else when it was genuinely your fault always causes more problems, and mistakes you try to hide almost always get found out eventually."

"Owning up to your mistakes and finding wisdom in your experiences is about as manly as it gets. Right on, brother."


4. You're not indestructible

"All the little injuries you pile up in your 20s and 30s will haunt you later."

"At 24, I jumped off a two-story house to entertain people at a party. At 40, I feel like someone has taken a sledgehammer to my back. I'm not a detective, but I think these two things are connected."

5. Don't waste your time

"By far, it has to be learning the value of TIME. So many people in this world don't grasp this until it's far too late in life. Don't waste your time doing things you hate, or being around bad people."

Pink Floyd said it best:

"'And then one day you find/ten years have got behind you/no one told you when to run/you missed the starting gun.'" I remember sitting in my car at 25 listening to that line and realizing I had first heard it 10 years earlier. It felt like a blink of an eye. Now I'm coming up on another 10 since that."


- YouTubewww.youtube.com

6. Value kindness

"Be kind, it's its own reward."

"It helps my mental health so much, just letting cars into your queue, saying please and thank you to people who don’t hear it often, talking to elderly people who rarely speak to others etc. Just trying to be a cheerful chill dude makes me very happy, happier than almost any possession I can think of buying."


7. Lift people up

"You’re not that funny when you put other people down. You are more of a man when you lift people up."

"This 100%. I teach middle school students, and I’m always trying to teach this. Also, how it shows way more strength to admit you’re wrong and apologize than lie and never own up to things."

8. Work out

"On a related note, it is a lot easier to not consume 300 calories than it is to burn 300 calories."

"This is the best blanket advice in here. I didn't start working out until I was 32. I was 50lbs overweight and felt like crap. Working out and making it a part of your daily routine has such a massive domino effect over your entire life, physically, mentally, routine, work ethic, literally everything. This should be mandatory for everyone to start at a young age and develop good habits. This coupled with proper eating/cooking habits are paramount."

9. Save for retirement

"Start saving for retirement. I know you've all heard it, but I can't stress how much more money you earn from your savings during your twenties. This is not a drill. Start saving money you don't touch until retirement."

"Compounding interest is very powerful, and it’s at its most powerful over a long period of time. So start young. The S&P 500 averages a 10% yearly return. At that rate, if you can invest $500 per month, then in 30 years, you’ll have over $1 million."


savings, retirement, couple doing bills, responsibility, wisdom, adviceA couple saving money.via Canva/Photos

10. Be a man of your word

"Your integrity is the only thing that can’t be taken from you."

"If you wouldn't want people knowing you said it/ did it don't say it/do it."

11. Don't wait

"The best way to improve your life is for you to improve your life. If you wait for someone or something to happen, it won't. Work today to improve your life in any way that you feel you need it."

"You're absolutely right and it deserves repeating, IT WILL NOT BE EASY, going to the gym sucks, going to school sucks, studying sucks the list is infinite but there's just no way around it. IT WILL NOT BE EASY, if it was, everyone would be doing it."

"No one is coming to save you. Do it yourself."

12. Plenty of fish in the sea

"There are literally millions of women. Why obsess over that ONE?"

"My advice is instead of worrying about women, work on yourself instead. Work on making yourself the happiest version of you, and then you will naturally find someone. Don't chase anyone or waste any time on anyone that's not interested."


breakup, love lost, heartbreak, the one, obsession, love advice, move on, A man and a woman have a fight.via Canva/Photos


13. Stretch

"Connective tissue health is underrated. Most common training injury."

"Flexibility naturally decreases as you age unless you take steps to maintain it. Improving it is hard. It's also crucial for progressing in many, many exercises."

14. Maintain friendships

"Don't burn bridges with people and try your best to maintain friendships."

"For one reason or another, the buddy list shrinks more and more as time goes on."

"I'm in my forties and have definitely had friends that have fallen off the list, but I continue to make friends along the way. I think it might be that I put serious effort into maintaining old relationships and trying to form new ones."

15. Make friends with women

"Make friends with women; And I don’t mean make friends with to have romantic relationships later… like just be platonic friends. Having someone that you can talk to with a different perspective can be so beneficial."

"Second this. Plus, if you're a good friend to a woman, she's likely to introduce you to her friends and vouch for you, which opens up more opportunities for romantic relationships. or more friends."

Angel statue in Poland

Over the past decade, Scandinavian concepts like ‘hygge’ and ‘lagom’ have dominated wellness and decorating trends. Hygge, a Danish concept without a direct English translation, captures the essence of coziness, warmth, and comfort in one's surroundings—think candles, fireplaces, and strategically placed lamps. Lagom, on the other hand, comes from the Swedes and roughly means “just enough. " This concept preaches finding tranquility in the balance of all things.

Which, you know, is nice. (Who doesn’t want to live in a lovely, snug home and bathe in the warm glow of candlelight?) What idiot would say no to a perfectly balanced life where there’s never too much or too little?

But sometimes, the biggest concern in life isn’t “How can I make this room cozier?” Life comes at you fast. Money arrives, then leaves even quicker. Families disagree, creating generational rifts that seem insurmountable. Governments fail to protect their citizens, exposing them to war, danger, and poverty. What then? Do Europeans have a neat little phrase for that?


white book near mugHygge is nice, certainly Photo by Pavan Trikutam on Unsplash


“Things will work out in the end”

In fact, the answer is yes. Enter 'Jakoś to będzie' (pronounced 'Ya-kosh toe ben-jay'), which literally translates to "Things will work out in the end." This contrasts sharply with the sunny, optimistic advice that often emerges from idyllic nations like Denmark, the Netherlands, and Sweden. “Learning about happiness from the Scandinavians can feel a little like learning about money from a millionaire when you struggle financially,” writes Olga Mecking. “Instead,” she continues, “why not learn from a country that has been through hell and back — multiple times — and is still standing?”


beautiful multicolored buildings Poland is a living testament to the human spirit Photo by Maksym Harbar on Unsplash

Of course, she is referring to Poland, a Central European country that has existed for 500,000 years. As one imagines, there’s a lot of history sandwiched between those 500,000 years, beginning with the Polish state’s establishment during the 10th century. In the 14th century, Poland joined forces with the Grand Duchy of Lithuania, culminating in the formation of the Polish-Lithuanian Commonwealth—one of Europe’s largest and most populous nations. Then, the strife: during the 18th century, the Commonwealth began to decline, eventually leading to the last King of Poland, Stanislaw Augustus, abdicating the throne in 1975. From there, many wars, insurrections, and violent protests were mounted against the country’s forced partitions, upheld by unwelcomed, occupying armies. However, Poland would not see independence again until 1918, when the Allies agreed to the country’s reconstitution in the aftermath of World War I. From there, even more chaos ensued. Devastation reigned during World War II, as much of the country fell into Nazi Germany’s hands, and Poland saw the near-annihilation of its Jewish population during the Holocaust.

Poland stands today not just as a country but as a powerful testament to the strength of the human spirit: despite the traumas that may come, optimism is always available to us. ‘Jakoś to będzie;’ “things will work out in the end.”


The true meaning of ‘jakoś to będzie’

Much like the country it hails from, the concept of ‘jakoś to będzie’ is all about resilience and grit in the face of life’s darkest and most uncertain moments. “It’s the unwavering certainty that we can do anything, no matter what obstacles we face along the way,” says Beata Chomątowska, co-author of “Jakoś to będzie. Szczęście po polsku” (or “Jakoś to będzie, the Polish way of life”). Meanwhile, the BBC describes ‘jakoś to będzie’ as “the perfect philosophy for tough times.”


brown and green concrete building under white sky during daytimeIt's Poland's philosophy for hard times. Photo by Zhi Xuan Hew on Unsplash

In some circles, ‘jakoś to będzie’ is presented as the anti-‘hygge’. While the latter encourages us to retreat into comfort, to adorn ourselves in cozy objects and fuzzy socks, the Polish approach embraces uncertainty head-on. This isn’t the time for hiding under a blanket with hot cocoa; ‘jakoś to będzie’ stresses the importance of acting without overthinking the consequences. It’s a peculiar philosophy that could only emerge from a country that has endured some of the most brutal hardships in history.

So, in an increasingly erratic, unknowable world, it might be wise to borrow a page or two from this Polish school of thought. Whenever a scary, daunting challenge arises—personal crises, difficulties at work, attempts to navigate any number of global problems, etc.—instead of falling into despair, try channeling a bit of this Polish spirit instead. Don’t overthink. Take that risk. Make something happen. ‘Jakoś to będzie’ — somehow, everything will work out. Moving forward is always better than staying still, no matter how frightening. Or, as Polish author Daniel Lis puts it, “[Life] is always a bit of adventure.”

Education

Why you should stop saying "I think" if you want to sound confident while speaking

We all do it, but it might be watering down what we're really trying to say.

Here's what recommended instead.

Clear, effective communication is just as much about what you don’t say as it is about what you do say. It’s incredibly easy for a message to get watered down with filler words and passive phrases, many of which we use on a daily basis.

Case and point: “I think” statements. Sure, this seems like a harmless option. Logical even. After all, it’s honest. Certain factors have led you to think this or that is the right choice, and thus, you are saying so. But as CNBC Make It contributor Lorraine K. Lee explains, overuse of these two well-intentioned words can “diminish your presence and undermine your confidence.”

In fact, Lee lumps “I think” in with “just,” “sorry” and “maybe,” which are more well-known examples of minimizing language, aka passive qualifiers that lessen the meaning of what you're trying to communicate, rather than enhance it. She notes that however "polite" these phrases seem, etiquette comes at the cost of credibility.

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Specifically, “I think” can make an opinion, however well informed, come across as nothing more than a passing thought, and therefore not taken seriously. Or it can make the speaker seem “hesitant” of their own perspective.

So instead, Lee recommends swapping “think” for “I recommend,” which conveys the same meaning but is more “action-oriented” and “decisive.” An example she uses is saying “I recommend trying this restaurant,” rather than “I think you should try this restaurant.“

Lee advises that this swap be used in times when you aren’t all that confident as well, with some added caveats for transparency. Using “from my experience, I’d recommend…” for example. It’s easy to see how you can be upfront about uncertainties, while still clearly communicating your stance.

Things get further conflated when you think about how many people use “I feel statements” when they mean to use “I think statements.” “I feel like this restaurant is better than the other one.” “I feel that you should go with this plan.” “I feel like this isn’t the most productive use of our time.” This is not only grammatically inaccurate, as these are opinions one thinks, not feels, but it also pacifies an already weakened version of what you’re trying to say in the first place.

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So, how do we really develop this better speaking habit? Lee recommends (see what we did there?) first listening for when and where those “I think” statements tend to pop up. You can even ask for the folks around you to help keep you accountable. She also suggests allowing for a pause before speaking, which gives you time to make the mental swap before saying anything out loud. And since most of us type exponentially more than we speak, be sure to make those swaps in written communications as well.

Photo credit: Canva

Bottom line; it’s easy for us to go on autopilot with our language. That, plus a desire to not come across as pushy or domineering, can cause us to not really say what we mean. But if we want to be understood, we need to be intentional with what we say, or don’t say.