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Man's 'spotting ADHD in women in 25 seconds' trick is creating an emotional response

"As I listened I started laughing because you're literally describing me, then I started crying because you're literally describing me."

Photo credit: Canva

Man's trick to spotting ADHD in women is creating an emotional response

ADHD can be debilitating at times. Sure, people make it out to be some cutesy condition where they forget things or hyper-focus on a hobby for days before moving on to something else. But there's more to the disorder than forgetfulness and a messy bedroom so when it's downplayed or placed in the category of just being quirky it's easy for those who have it to feel misunderstood and unseen.

This is especially true for women because ADHD presents differently in them and symptoms can fluctuate throughout the month due to hormone changes. Many girls are not diagnosed with the disorder until well into womanhood due to the uncharacteristic presentation though change is occurring to catch the diagnosis before girls reach adulthood.

Alex Partridge, the founder of LADBible and UNILAD is an adult with ADHD and hosts a podcast called ADHD Chatter. Recently he shared a video explaining how to spot ADHD in women in less than 30 seconds and the response was an emotional fire hydrant. The short clip, quickly goes through some key manifestations of ADHD in women and it's quite accurate.

Giphy

"They will overthink everything. That's because the hyperactivity is in their heads. It's like five squirrels on speed barreling around up there and it never stops, ever. And this will cause a lot of anxiety which is why so many women were misdiagnosed with an anxiety disorder," Partridge starts the video.

ADDitude Magazine writes women have, "a subtle symptom presentation with a greater likelihood of inattentiveness marks the ADHD experience for many women and girls, who are not outwardly disruptive to others," before adding. "Research shows that women are highly motivated to hide their ADHD symptoms and compensate for them. The symptoms that are observable are often anxiety or mood-related, which can lead to misdiagnosis."

Inside Out Hello GIF by Disney PixarGiphy

The video hits on some key components of ADHD in women like the tendency to overshare, becoming overwhelmed over seemingly small things but managing well in crisis situations. Partridge even mentions difficulty maintaining friendships due to lacking object permanence, which is extremely common and adds to the forgetfulness experienced in ADHD.

Someone who has ADHD maintaining a friendship with someone who doesn't likely leads to a lot of hurt feelings because if that person moves out of their recent call or text log, they essentially no longer exist. This isn't because the person with ADHD doesn't want to maintain connection or doesn't think their friendship is important, it is due to the reminder of that person no longer being in their eyesight. Lack of effective object permanence is also the reason if things are put away, like fruit in a fridge drawer, they're often forgotten because they're not seen.

- YouTubeyoutube.com

Partridge says about women with ADHD, "they will spend their life feeling like they're constantly just barely staying above water. They'll wish they could go back in time, put their arms around a younger version of themselves and reassure them that everything is going to be okay and that they're not broken, just different."

Women responded to his video with tears and feelings of being seen, not judged, with one woman sharing, "as I listened I started laughing because you're literally describing me, then I started crying because you're literally describing me."

Sad Cry GIFGiphy

Another writes, "I actually cried watching this because no one has ever perfectly described my inner world in less than 30 seconds."

One woman shares, "Wow. Just wow. So accurate. I beat myself up all the time because I have realized the telling a similar story is perceived as me wanting to "take over" or "make it all about me" when my whole life I have meant it to show empathy. It makes me feel ashamed. But I have good intentions when I do that. Thank you for acknowledging that."

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Woman recreates 'Inside Out' from a neurodivergent standpoint and people are feeling seen

The video isn't just funny, it's pretty darn accurate.

Georgia/YouTube

Woman recreates "Inside Out" from a neurodivergent standpoint.

Remember the hit Pixar movie "Inside Out"? If not, it's a cartoon where emotions are personified so you can sort of see what each emotion is thinking. It's a really sweet, funny and surprisingly emotional movie. But a woman who goes by Georgia on YouTube took that concept and decided to recreate it using different types of neurodivergent diagnoses and features.

In the video, Georgia plays all of the characters who all interact with each other as they work on controlling what the human they're inside does. The characters are "General Thoughts," "Dyslexia," "ADHD," "Sensory Issues," "OCD" and "Anxiety."

Georgia is attempting to make dinner, but it's a pretty intense process with all of these characters getting in the way, and while General Thoughts attempts to keep everyone on track...eh...it doesn't work out so well.

Watching how Anxiety and OCD feed into one another while ADHD drives just about everybody to the point of dysregulation is a pretty accurate portrayal of what it's like to have neurospicy tendencies. Commenters applauded Georgia on the accuracy and felt seen by the creative display of what it's like to live with neurodivergence.

"Omg I’m neurodivergent and I can’t describe how relatable this is both me and my mum are and we sat down and watched it together and I don’t think I’ve ever seen something more relatable xx thank you for doing things like this xx," Estella Sylvester wrote.

"As a person with anxiety, OCD, and PTSD this video made me tear up. The accurate acknowledgment of conditions that are so stigmatized or romanticized means an indescribable amount to me, especially coming from a creator I've followed since I was a kid. We're not defined by our conditions, but they follow us through every moment of every day, and that's okay. Thank you for this Georgia, we love you <3," Elle commented.

"I have autism and ADHD and my brain is literally like this... I always thought that no one would understand me. This video means everything to me and I'm so happy and relieved to know that I am not alone. Thank you and I love you Georgia," Tess Sexton wrote.

If you're neurodivergent, watch the video below to see how well Georgia portrayed neurodiversity. If you're not neurodivergent, check out the video to get the inside scoop on how neurodivergent brains work. You may find it fascinating.

This article originally appeared on 3.17.23

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Barber finds calling walking neurodivergent children through haircuts free of charge

"As a special education teacher, YES YES YES TO EVERYTHING."

Photo credit: Canva

Barber walks autistic boy through first haircut in years

Haircuts are a pretty typical part of life but the mundane activity can be overwhelming for some people, especially children who are neurodivergent. Some kids have a hard time sitting still for the length of time it takes to get a proper haircut while others are overstimulated by the lights, sounds and feelings that come with a haircut.

Getting a quick trim may be much easier for some because it doesn't require the use of clippers which can be loud and tickle. Vernon Jackson, owner of The Gifted Event has become known for his ability to cut neurodivergent children's hair in a way that allows them to feel safe. The Gifted Event is a program Jackson runs from his barbershop allowing him to provide haircuts hair free of charge for the families of neurodivergent and special needs children.

Recently, Jackson uploaded a video that shows exactly how he walks his young clients through getting their haircut and it's really striking a chord with people. The barber is in his shop ready to go when a young autistic boy, Harry is brought in for a haircut. The boy has very long hair that's pulled back in a ponytail. You can visibly see Harry's hesitation along with the nerves of his mom, Brittany.

Scarlett Johansson GIF by NETFLIXGiphy

"He's had haircuts in the past but it was when he was much younger and definitely more into it but now even brushing his hair, washing his hair is difficult," Brittany explains to Jackson before sharing that Harry normally wants "no part" of clippers or scissors.

Though the nervous mom assures Jackson that she understands if the haircut can't happen due to her child's response, this didn't deter the man who has found these haircuts to be a calling. Before getting Harry in the chair, Jackson softens his tone while encouraging the boy to give him a high-five. It took some coaxing of a couple high-fives, a side hug and Jackson holding him by the hand to walk him to the chair. Every step of the way, Jackson asked for the boy's permission before doing anything allowing him to be in control of the pace of the appointment.

@thegiftedeventoff 🌟✨ Watch this incredible haircut transformation! ✂️💖 I help neurodivergent kids conquer their fears, and this one is our biggest yet! Every haircut is FREE for families, thanks to your amazing donations. 🙌💙 Want to make a difference? Donate a haircut at thegiftedevent.com! Or click the link in my bio! Let’s spread the love and break barriers together! 💪💫 #HaircutHeroes #Neurodiversity #Transformations ♬ original sound - TheGiftedEventOfficial

Once the boy was in the chair, even adjusting the height of the chair was a bit of a challenge when the barber moved just a little too fast. Jackson immediately noticed Harry's fear and asked to raise the chair at a slow one pump at a time. The boy agreed and before too long the cape was on and the process was starting. To get the kids to look down when needed, Jackson allows them to pick out one of the action figures he keeps in the barber shop. Harry chose Spider Man.

But before any cutting got started, Jackson prepped the boy on what was about to happen, "alright Harry, this is called a clipper. Have you ever seen it before? Do you want to feel it? Feel it. See how it vibrates? Do you want to feel it right here?"

man shaving the boy's hair Photo by Jonathan Weiss on Unsplash

Jackson put the clipper against his own arm before putting it against Harry's arm, "That's all that does, it just vibrates, okay? It's all it does. Does it tickle? A little bit?" He then places the vibrating clipper in different spots on the boy's head asking him if it was okay. Once Jackson gets the all clear from Harry, he begins the cut.

While Harry keeps scrunching into his shoulders, he's allowing Jackson to not only use sheers to cut off his long ponytail, but to use the clippers to buzz the sides. The child's comfort level causes a woman who is attending the appointment with Harry to excitedly try to get in front of the pair to take a picture or video. This moment results in Jackson asserting a boundary for the boy and himself to keep Harry's stimulation level as low as possible in that moment.

@thegiftedeventoff 🌟✨ Watch this incredible haircut transformation! ✂️💖 I help neurodivergent kids conquer their fears, and this one is our biggest yet! Every haircut is FREE for families, thanks to your amazing donations. 🙌💙 Want to make a difference? Donate a haircut at thegiftedevent.com! Or click the link in my bio! Let’s spread the love and break barriers together! 💪💫 #HaircutHeroes #Neurodiversity #Transformations ♬ original sound - TheGiftedEventOfficial

"No, no, no. If you want to record, record from back there. I don't want you interact with him while he's still focused right now. You can record if you want to do a video. I just don't want the interaction while I got him calm," Jackson asserts.

At this point the bulk of the haircut is complete but he still needs to line up the back and edges while Harry is tolerating the buzzing, so Jackson offers the boy his hand while he cuts with the other. The end results are so amazing that while Harry doesn't speak many words, he can't contain his excitement, neither can his sister and mom. It's contagious as commenters also cant stop gushing over the patience of Jackson and the results of the haircut.

@thegiftedeventoff These moments make what i do extremely worth it! To donate a haircut • learn my techniques via my online course • or to book click the link in my bio or visit thegiftedevent.com
♬ original sound - TheGiftedEventOfficial

Someone writes, "as a special education teacher, YES YES YES TO EVERYTHING 10 ACROSS-THE-BOARD THIS is how you work!!!!!!!"

"He did soooo good. I love how he was slumped over in fear at first and then gained so much confidence and trust towards the end. You are so AWESOME," another shares.

"He looks amazing. And I love how you explained to them what you were doing and to give him space to have his own experience," one person gushes.

"I love how he stopped the woman because he knew, that might be too much right now. Not being disrespectful but being firm, for the kids own good assertive skills right there," someone else noted.

Harry's mom even chimed in with an update for the barber saying, "We couldn’t be more grateful to you for what you’ve done for us! Harry loves his cut and cannot stop admiring himself! Still cracking up over the hairdryer!"

The Gifted Event runs strictly off of donations in order to provide free appointments to the families that visit the barbershop. Anyone can donate a haircut for a family in need by going to thegiftedevent.com.

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Autistic employee goes viral with office sign that breaks down  'bad communicator’ stereotypes

"There is no malicious intent. It is the autism."

via aegoaegyo/TikTok

Yuri has a very important message for his co-workers.

While every person with autism spectrum disorder (ASD) is different, there are some common communication traits that everyone should understand. Many with ASD process language literally and have a hard time understanding body language, social cues, exaggeration and cultural cues.

This can lead to misunderstandings that result in people with ASD appearing to be rude when it wasn't their intent. If more neurotypical people (those without ASD) better understood these communication differences, it’d be much easier for everyone to get along.

A perfect example of this problem and how to fix it was shared by Yuri, a transmasc person who goes by he/they, who posts on TikTok about having ADHD and ASD. In a post that has more than 2.3 million views, Yuri claims he was “booked for a disciplinary meeting for being a bad communicator.”

Obviously, his manager needs to learn a little more about working with people with ASD.

To help his co-workers better understand his unique communication style, Yuri posted a note on his office door so there wouldn't be any more misunderstandings.

I'm autistic.

I prefer direct, literal and detailed communication

If I am:

Not making eye contact

Not greeting you back

Not understanding your social cues, etc.

There is no malicious intent. It is the autism.

Thank you for understanding.

@aegoaegyo

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The post inspired some great responses from people who totally understand what Yuri is going through.

"This should be the norm tbh!! very proud of you for stating your boundaries and needs clearly," Alastar wrote. "I wish everyone had signs telling me how to communicate tbh," Bro added.

"How is it that we prefer direct, literal, and detailed communication, but somehow WE'RE the ones with a communication issue???" Reading cosmere! wrote.

In a follow-up video, Yuri addressed some of the commenters who didn’t know if he was diagnosed by a doctor.

@aegoaegyo

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“The funniest thing about the comment section of my autism sign video is the people who are asking me, ‘Are you self-diagnosed? Are you formally diagnosed?'” he said in the video. “Do you think neurotypical people would make a sign like that? Do you think that would happen? Do you think a neurotypical person would do that?”

Autism is a misunderstood disorder so it was a brave move by Yuri to come out about being on the spectrum and share how he prefers to communicate. It’s also a reminder for all of us that we all have the right to show others how we wish to communicate.

This story is also a great lesson for anyone who works with people who have ASD to learn more about their unique communication styles so we can all understand one another. It could be the difference between a hostile work environment and one where everyone can thrive and feel safe.


This article originally appeared on 5.16.22

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