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Autistic woman praises parents who dress their disabled children in age appropriate clothes

"Let them have drip."

autism; special needs; style; age appropriate style; autistic teen; autistic adults; disabled teens

Woman praise parents of disabled teens who dress them their age

It's not uncommon to see teens and young adults who are cognitively or physically disabled in clothing that looks like it's more appropriate for elementary aged children. Of course there are different reasons for this, such as the teen preferring to wear younger clothes or it being the person's special interest at the moment. But sometimes it can be that the adults around them still view them as an elementary aged child though they are chronologically and sometimes developmentally much older.

Recently, Clare, an autistic woman took to social media to express her excitement over stumbling across a mother's page that features her nonverbal autistic teenage son. Clare wasn't excited simply because the mom was documenting her life with an autistic child, she took note of something she doesn't see often.

In the background behind the woman's video is a picture of a teenage boy dressed in a pair of of skinny jeans, a Nike zip-up and a blue puffer jacket. By all appearances he looks like a typical teen boy heading to school or the mall but that's what caught Clare's eye.

Style Swag GIF by ComplexGiphy

"So this post was saying they have a non-verbal autistic son and that they dress them like this and I just...I love when parents of special needs children understand that they are still people, that probably wouldn't want to dress like children for their entire life. I love when you see special needs parents of teenagers that dress their kids like teenagers or special needs parents of adults that dress their kids like adults and not just someone repressed in time," the woman shares.

Later she further explains that she appreciates when parents dress their children with special needs like they think they would want to dress and not how they think they should dress due to their disability. Clare says, "cause I see so often teenagers that are special needs that are dressed in like clothing in a style that looks similar to like a four or five year old still. I just love when parents make that effort to try to dress their child in a way that they think that their child would be comfortable even if they cannot express how they would wanna dress."

@lacroix_goth #greenscreen parents that give their children a sense of style and self even if they can’t for themselves 😮💨 the best G_twins_baby is the original post and mom btw!! #fyp #foryou #foryoupage #specialneedmom #specialneedschild #fashion #autistic #nonverbal ♬ original sound - Clare♉️

The teenager that inspired the video praising his mom is 16-year-old Gi'Avonnie-year-old Gi'Avonnie who is always dressed like he could walk onto the set of any high school tv show as the new cool kid. In the caption of the post that caught Clare's attention reads, "it's all about aura when you're nonverbal I won't talk but you will feel the vibe."

One commenter shares with Clare about a woman who became the caregiver of her adult God brother with autism who has since had a "glow up" due to being seen as an adult. John West, aka Mr. West is a man in his mid-thirties who is now under the guardianship of his God sister Des. Prior to Mr. West coming under the care of Des he was denied treats like soda, had severe dental hygiene struggles and seemed to not have much filling his days but things quickly changed with his new caregiver.

@g_twins_baby It’s all about Aura when you’re nonverbal😅 I won’t talk but you will feel the vibe #autismmom #nonverbalautism #autism #bekind ♬ original sound - shah

Since having a voice in his choices, Mr. West not only revamped his entire style but has since started college, started dating and even took his first solo trip. The man appears to be enjoying all of his new freedoms and since Des has been caring for him, he now has his own place right next door to hers.

People seem to agree that teens and adults with disabilities should be dressed and treated like their numerical age whenever appropriate with one person writing, "I think if the child WANTS to dress like their special interest them go for it. But if they don’t care, dress them age appropriate."

"My boss has a kid with autism and he uses an ipad to talk (acc device) and she is slowly putting small curse words since hes getting older i loveee it," another writes.

Someone else says, "for real! disabled people deserve dignity. i wish it was more normalized for parents to treat disabled people as presumed competent but with reasonable accommodation."

One person reminds others, "special needs is a spectrum. Some are at the accurate mental age and others aren’t. Many special needs clients are still interested in “kid” things, many aren’t."

Everyone's personality is different and special needs children, teens and adults are no different, this means some teens may only want to wear Disney princess outfits while others want typical high school drip. Some adults may prefer sweatpants and Sponge Bob t-shirts while others want to wear styles that feel closer to their age. Others may not be able to communicate how they want to dress or to be treated at all and rely on their caregiver to decide. No matter what the personal style or developmental level may be, the focus for all seems to be what's best for the child which is what the majority of parents care about the most.

via Meg Sullivan (used with permission) and Canva/Photos

A volunteer hands out food in a food bank and Meg Sullivan shares her dad's kind gesture.

When we consider people who have had a positive impact on the world, we often think of those who have made grand gestures to improve the lives of others, such as Martin Luther King, Jr., Greta Thunberg, or Mahatma Gandhi. Unfortunately, that type of effort is out of reach for the average person.

However, O Organics would like to remind everyone that they can positively impact the world through small, consistent acts of kindness that add up over time. Much like how a small creek can create a valley over the years, we can change lives through small, consistent acts of kindness.

O Organics is dedicated to the well-being of all by nourishing people everywhere with delicious organic foods grown by producers who meet USDA-certified organic farming standards.

Upworthy's Instagram page recently posted a touching example of everyday kindness. Meg Sullivan shared how her father, Tom, peeled oranges for her lunch just about every day from kindergarten through high school. But on the final day of her senior year of high school, he sent his 17-year-old daughter unpeeled oranges with a touching note about how she’d have to start peeling them for herself.



“It’s Time Baby Girl,” he wrote on a wikiHow printout on how to peel an orange with a drawing of himself crying. For the father, this daily ritual was about more than just making lunch; it was about showing that he cared by going the extra mile. “I could have put money on her lunch account,” Tom told Today.com. “But it’s one of those little things I thought was important, that she knows somebody’s taking the time to take care of her.”

The small, daily gesture taught Megan an essential lesson in kindness.

The post reminded people how their fathers’ small acts of kindness meant so much to them. “My dad peeled my oranges until I graduated high school, too. Now, I peel my daughter’s oranges and will for the next 7 plus years,” Katie wrote in the comments. “Love this. My dad peeled mine, too. When I moved out, he gave me an orange peeler gadget,” Mary added.

o organics, albertson's giving backO Organics has a wide array of foods and flavors covering almost everything on your shopping list.via Albertson's

Did you know that every time you go to the supermarket, you can also change the world through small gestures? O Organics not only allows you to feed your family delicious and nutritious organic food, but each purchase also gives back to help people and communities facing food insecurity.

Through contributions from customers like you, O Organics donates up to 28 million meals annually. The company’s contribution is essential when, according to the USDA, 47.4 million Americans live in food-insecure households.

O Organics has a wide array of foods and flavors covering almost everything on your shopping list. “Over the years, we have made organic foods more accessible by expanding O Organics to every aisle across our stores, making it possible for health and budget-conscious families to incorporate organic food into every meal,” Jennifer Saenz, EVP and Chief Merchandising Officer at Albertsons, one of many stores where you can find O Organics products, said in a statement.

O Organics now offers over 1500 items, from dairy products such as eggs and milk to packaged meats and breakfast staples such as cereal bars, granola and oatmeal. You can also enjoy affordable organic produce with O Organics’ fresh salads and fruit.

Everybody wants to make the world a better place. With O Organics, you can feed your family healthy, organic food every time you go to the market while paying it forward by contributing to the company’s efforts to end food insecurity nationwide. That’s a small, daily gesture that can amount to incredible change.

Parenting

Mom shares 4-part secret to making her home "the house" for her son and his friends.

Con: They eat all your food. Pro: You'll learn to know and trust the people they spend their time with.

hi.im.amywhite/Instagram

I grew up in "the house." In high school, my home was the designated place where my friends gathered, sometimes in big groups, sometimes just my small core squad. My three best friends spent the night there almost every Friday and/or Saturday night for four years straight. We devoured Totino's frozen pizzas by the dozens, inhaled soda, and laid waste to any snacks or leftovers that were brave enough to exist somewhere in the kitchen. Not only that, but my house was pretty small — four teenage boys took up a lot of space in the living room (the whole thing) and made a lot of noise playing video games deep into the night. It must have driven my parents and older brothers crazy. It's a wonder anyone put up with it.

Or, so I thought when I was younger. When I became a parent myself, I started to understand a little more why my mom and dad were so willing to host and feed me and all my friends every single weekend. Why the outrageous grocery bill and constant chaos in the house was probably a small price to pay.

One mom has perfectly encapsulated why turning her home into "the house" for her son and his friends was so valuable and exactly how she did it.


Giphy

Amy White shared a reel on Instagram showing her college-aged son hanging in her dining room with a group of friends playing cards. The text overlay reads "What makes your kids high school friends want to come over, play cards & spend the night on their College Christmas Break". I think most parents can agree that we want our kids to keep coming home as long as possible! So how exactly did White pull this off?

Her explanation in the caption was spot-on.

First, White says that you have to start early. Become "the hang out house" in high school or even earlier. Then you have a better chance of holding onto the mantle into your kid's college years.

Next, be ready to stock the house with snacks and drinks, and don't make a fuss when your kid's friends have at it. "The kids knew we had food," she writes, "BUT they also knew I didn't care what they had. They knew they could eat anything in my pantry and fridge."

Third, and this is a big one, don't mistake being the "cool house" for being "the house." Some parents choose to allow their underage kids and friends to drink alcohol under their supervision, but you don't have to bend your morals and the law to lure the squad over to your place. Pizza and Coke is plenty to keep most teens happy. "We were not the house that served alcohol or even allowed the kids to bring alcohol to our house. And Guess What?? The kids still came and wanted to hang at our house!"

Fourth, always say Yes (as often as possible, anyway) when your kids want to have friends over. "They know my answer is 99% of the time YES," White writes. "You have to have your kids take the leadership of offering your home and if your home was 'open' to their friends in high school, they know it will be 'open' to their friends in college."

As a bonus tip, White pleas with parents not to worry about the mess having friends over makes. "I love a clean house and organization, BUT I would much rather have a crazy messy house for the kids where memories are made than a quiet house with nothing going on just to keep my house 'clean.'"

White writes, "It's worth being 'the house', so let go of control & get to know your kids friends." Commenters agreed.

White's video went viral to the tune of 8.5 million views and hundreds of comments. Parents shared their own experiences of what it's like being the default hang out house.

"Our house was the high school hangout for my son and friends... every weekend... I loved it!! Miss it now that they are all college graduates and have moved away. I love seeing them when they do come home for the holidays"

"A wise man once said don't be the house with the alcohol. Be the house with the food."


Teenagers will ravage your kitchenMichael Richards Eating GIFGiphy

"Amy 1000% agree!!! My house is full of teenagers on the weekends and I love every bit of it. Even though I wake up to a kitchen that looked much different from when I left it"

"we never allowed alcohol, drugs, bad language, always respectful, and guess what, our house was always the house where the kids hung out. First my daughter, then my son. Through grade school, high school, then when my kids went out of state for college their college friends would come spend a couple weeks during the summer. I always thought of it this way, I loved knowing my kids friends and, who knows, maybe some of those kids, especially during the younger years, just maybe those kids just needed an adult to care. Anyway, it was always fun to have them here!"

"It used to crack me up when my daughter would bring over a bunch of her friends (girls and boys) in high school and instead of hanging out in the family room they all wanted to crowd into either the kitchen with me or our tiny office and happily share all the gossip with me."

Experts say that knowing your kids' friends, and their parents, can have huge benefits. Not only will it bring you the peace of mind of knowing where your kid is and who they're with when they get to those crucial high school years, it has been shown to tangibly improve kids ability to create positive relationships and problem-solve collaboratively. Plus, it can actually be really fun! Kids and teens are the funniest, silliest, most interesting people on the planet. Having a house full of them is messy and loud, but it's always a good time.

Just "Don’t feel bad if your house isn’t the chosen house," one commenter reminds us. "Just be happy your kid has a good group of friends and be thankful they have somewhere safe to hang out."

via Canva

Don't underestimate the power of body language.

If you’re single and want to meet someone when you go out with your friends, one of the most important things is to be mindful of your body language. Yes, how you put yourself together and your attitude matter, but people looking to meet someone want to be 100% certain they are approaching someone who wants to be approached. That's where body language plays a big role.

People with an open posture are approached more often in bars, but most think that means being sure that your arms aren’t folded or that you aren't holding a drink in front of your chest. However, author and founder of Science of People, Vanessa Van Edwards says how you position your feet is just as important. Science of People aims to help people communicate better in their lives and careers and as a self-proclaimed "recovering awkward person," Van Edwards as penned several books specializing in science-based people skills.

“I want you to make sure that your torso is open and angled out towards the room,” she told Steven Bartlett on the Diary of a CEO podcast. “I like croissant feet. You know, parallel feet are, like what we're doing right now in a dating situation. I want you to have croissant feet, which is your feet are angled toward the biggest part of the room, saying, I'm open. Come and approach me. Okay?”

@goldenshopdeals

Vanessa Van Edwards on gestures used to attract people @Steven Bartlett #diaryofaceo #doac #stevenbartlett #fyp #foryoupage


Van Edwards further explained croissant feet on Science of People from the perspective of someone looking to join a group or ask someone sitting alone if they can join them.

“When scanning a room full of people, look for what I call 'the croissant feet,'” she writes. “Croissant feet happens when someone’s feet are pointed outward, creating a V-shape. The feet are usually angled outward, away from the conversation partner(s). You’ll usually see this when someone is bored of a conversation or looking for someone else to hop in.”

One study published inPsychology Todayfound that in a speed dating scenario, people with open postures were 76% more likely to be chosen as a date than those without.

Van Edwards adds that once you see someone standing with croissant feet, the polite thing to do is to lightly touch them on the arm and ask, “Can I join you?” Then, once you join the group and become an “adder,” don’t take over the conversation, just contribute to the flow.


In the TikTok post, Van Edwards says that while you stand with croissant feet, it’s important to look around the room, make eye contact with people you’re attracted to, and smile. But you’re going to have to make eye contact multiple times. “So, Monica Moore actually studied this. I believe it took eight glances to get someone to approach. Don't quote me on that. It was way higher than I thought,” she said. When you gesture, all of the movements should be towards the person you want to approach you, further showing your availability. "I'm making a gesture for them to literally come over. If they are attracted to you at all, they will come over. If they don't come over, they're probably not attracted to you.”

In the end, approaching a stranger in a bar, at a conference, or a singles meet-up involves many uncertainties. So, when someone appears as available as possible without seeming desperate, they are much more attractive. That’s a good lesson for anyone looking to meet someone: Don’t be afraid to make it a little obvious.

Health

Why 'boomer panic' is a real thing, not just generational bashing

There's a heartbreaking reason behind the problem.

What is "boomer panic"?

In a video posted in September 2023, TikToker @myexistentialdread used the phrase “boomer panic” to explain how baby boomers (1946 to 1964) can quickly become unhinged when faced with the most minor problems. It all started when she visited a Lowe’s hardware store and encountered a boomer-aged woman working at the check-out stand.

“I had a dowel that didn’t have a price tag on it, whatever, so I ran back and took a photo of the price tag. And as I was walking back towards her, I was holding up my phone… because I had multiple dowels and that was the one that didn’t have the price tag on it,” she said in the video. “And she looks at me and she goes, ‘I don’t know which one that is,’ and she starts like, panicking.” The TikToker said that the woman was “screechy, panicking for no reason.”

Many people raised by boomers understood what she meant by "boomer panic." "Boomer panic is such a good phrase for this! Minor inconvenience straight to panic," the most popular commenter wrote. And while there was some boomer-bashing in the comments, some younger people tried to explain why the older folks have such a hard time regulating their emotions: “From conversations with my mother, they weren’t allowed to make mistakes and were harshly punished if they did.” The TikToker responded, “A lot of people mentioned this, and it breaks my heart. I think you’re right,” Myexistentialdread responded.

A follow-up video by YourTango Editor Brian Sundholm tried to explain boomer panic in an empathetic way.

“Well, it's likely that there actually was a reason the woman started panicking about a seemingly meaningless problem,” Sundholm said. “Most of us nowadays know the importance of recognizing and feeling our emotions.” Sundholm then quoted therapist Mitzi Bachman, who says that when people bottle up their emotions and refuse to express them, it can result in an "unhinged" reaction.

TikToker Gabi Day shared a similar phenomenon she noticed with her boomer mom; she called the behavior “anxiety-at-you.”

Day’s boomer mother was “reactive,” “nervous,” and “anxious” throughout her childhood. Now, she is still on edge with Day’s children. “She's immediately like gasping and just really like exaggerated physical reactions, and then, of course, that kind of startles my kid,” Day said. “Again, I know that this comes from a place of care. It's just a lot,” she continued.

@itsgabiday

It comes from a place of love but it is exhausting 🫠😬 #millennialmomsoftiktok #boomergrandma #reparenting #gentleparenting

There is a significant difference in emotional intelligence and regulation between how boomers were raised and how younger generations, such as Gen X, Millennials, and Gen Z, were brought up. Boomers grew up when they had to bottle up their feelings to show their resilience. This can lead to growing anger, frustration with situations and people, chronic stress, and anxiety—all conditions that can lead to panicky, unhinged behavior.

Ultimately, Sundholm says that we should sympathize with boomers who have difficulty regulating their emotions and see it as an example of the great strides subsequent generations have made in managing their mental health. “It may seem a little harsh to call something "boomer panic," but in the context of how many of them were raised, it makes a lot of sense,” Sundholm says. “It also underlines the importance of emotional regulation skills and teaching them to future generations. And maybe most important, having compassion for those who never had a chance to learn them.”

Science

Astronaut unlocks a new phobia with a demonstration of being stuck in mid-air on the ISS

It's like that nightmare where you run as hard as you can and can't get anywhere.

Few of us ever get to float in space, much less feel what it's like to be stuck in mid-air.

Humans have all kinds of fears, from reasonable to totally irrational. But one fear most of us may have never even considered is being stuck hovering in mid-air, in the middle of a room, unable to make our body move in one direction or another no matter how hard or how fast we move our arms and legs.

Why would we, after all? Gravity works perfectly well here on Earth and we know how to make our bodies move in accordance with the forces of physics. The vast majority of us would never find ourselves in the scenario described above, thankfully. Many people have had that dream where you're running as hard as you can and not getting anywhere, but doing it while suspended in space is a whole other level of nightmare fuel.

In a video that has repeatedly gone viral, an astronaut demonstrated what it's like to be trapped in mid-air in a video from the International Space Station (ISS) and it unlocked a new phobia for people.

Can you really get stuck in mid-air on the ISS?

As retired Canadian astronaut Chris Hadfield explained in a 2011 Q & A after a 5-month stint on the ISS, it is possible to get stuck floating in the space station if you can't reach a wall to push yourself off from.

"Yes, it is—you can get stuck floating in the center of Node 1, where open space is biggest due to hatches on all sides," he wrote on Reddit. "But ISS has fans and forced air to mix and refresh the internal atmosphere, so there's always a small crosswind. Wait long enough, you'll get pulled to an air inlet."

So, you wouldn't be stuck like this forever but it might feel like it for a bit. One way to solve the problem if no one is around to help you would be to take off your clothes, wad them into a compact ball, and throw them, utilizing Newton's third law of motion to create a force that would propel you backward. Even the flailing around we see would move you incrementally in one direction if you repeat it long enough. You could also try blowing really hard, which would make for a very slow solution but would help you move a tiny bit. The only way to truly get stuck this way is for you to be nude with no air currents at all.

Of course, getting yourself into this mid-air hovering position in the first place is nearly impossible, since any momentum that pushed you into the middle of the room would move you out of it as well. You'd have to have your fellow astronauts purposefully put you in the center of Node 1 and hold you absolutely still before letting go in order to hover like that, which we see is exactly what happened in a longer version of this video. It's a fun experiment to watch, though, unless you're truly terrified of being stuck this way.

Zero gravity does weird things to the human body

Living on the ISS is strange, as our bodies aren't accustomed to a zero gravity environment. But the station has had people living there continuously since 2000 and we've learned a lot about what humans need to thrive without gravity. It's very important for astronauts on the ISS to exercise at least two hours daily, for instance, both for muscle and bone health.

astronaut exercisingThe ISS has special equipment to help astronauts maintain muscle strength in zero gravity.Photo credit: NASA

As NASA shares:

"NASA has learned that without Earth’s gravity affecting the human body, weight-bearing bones lose on average 1% to 1.5% of mineral density per month during spaceflight. After returning to Earth, bone loss might not be completely corrected by rehabilitation; however, their risk for fracture is not higher. Without the proper diet and exercise routine, astronauts also lose muscle mass in microgravity faster than they would on Earth."

NASA adds that eyesight can be impacted by the zero gravity environment as well.

"The fluids in the body shift upward to the head in microgravity, which may put pressure on the eyes and cause vision problems. If preventive or countermeasures are not implemented, crews may experience an increased risk of developing kidney stones due to dehydration and increased excretion of calcium from their bones."

The fact that humans can now live in space is a remarkable testament to our ability to innovate, and the more we learn about what lies beyond the bounds of our planet, the more possibilities we'll find for the future of humanity (just as long as we always help one another out when we find ourselves stuck running in place).

Unsplash

How was job hunting 79 years ago?

I've always loved looking at old family photos. Of course, I love the ones from when I was a kid, but I've always been fascinated by the ones that go back even further than that. I love the snapshots of life we find from 50 or even 100 years ago, in what looks like a completely different universe. It's one thing to see old-fashioned clothes or cars in a film, but to see evidence that they really existed is really wild and powerful in a way.

Even better is if you can find more than just old photos of your parents, grandparents, and other relatives. Handwritten letters, old documents—these are absolute treasures that really bring the past to life.

Kyra Shishko's grandfather, Ellsworth Rosen, recently passed away at the incredible age of 100. When going through his things, Shishko discovered an old resume that he'd written way back in 1946.

gif of men boarding a boatAll the way back to World War IIGiphy

She posted it to the subreddit r/TheWayWeWere, which serves as a collection of photos and documents of how people lived 50, 100, or more years ago. Social media users were fascinated by the document, with the post racking up thousands of likes and over 300 comments.

Rosen was an English major who served in World War II, where he wrote for Stars and Stripes, a military newspaper. The CV details his experience as "liaison with French newspaper reporters in Marseille" and as company interpreter in French and German.

Other highlights of the resume include:

Numerous typos! The resume would have been typed on a typewriter, and this may have been an early draft. But it's still amusing for the modern reader to see because a typo in a modern resume would be an instant death-knell if detected by the AI screeners.

A physical description: He notes that he's "Single," "68 [inches] tall", and "180 pounds."

A list of hobbies: Perhaps the most iconic part of the resume is that his interests include "theater, sports, chess, and women." Hey, can't blame a guy for being honest! He also casually mentions hitch-hiking around the United States under the 'Travel' section.

A distinct lack of corporate buzzwords: While Ellsworth certainly puts some effort into making himself sound good here, the whole thing is pretty matter of fact. There are no ballooned figures or gussied-up verbs (say, coordinated streamlined delivery of paper to 50,000 subscribers). It definitely harkens back to a simpler time when standing out on the job market wasn't so cutthroat.

In all seriousness though, for as odd as it looks compared to modern resumes, this CV speaks to an incredible amount of life-lived even to this young point in Ellsworth's life.

You can see the entire document and viral post here:

Commenters loved seeing this unique time capsule. Old photos and letters get passed down in most families, but a resume is a rather unusual find.

"That is such a fantastic piece of family history!"

"What a special document, and testament to the incredible life your grandfather lived."

"I find it fascinating the kinds of things that seemed relevant on a resume at that time that we wouldn't think of putting on a resume today. In fact, sometimes It's the opposite where employers don't want to know those things so they can avoid discrimination, such as a description of looks."

"What a fascinating glimpse into the past. A resume that reads like a life well-lived, with a dash of charm that modern applications lack. The simplicity of it is refreshing and reminds us that sometimes, the best qualifications aren't just what you can type out on a computer."

gif of an older car driving down a streetThe way we were. Giphy

The older you get, the more you appreciate opportunities to see your parents and grandparents as normal human beings who once stood where you stand. Before they were the fully grown, fully formed authority figures in your life, they were kids, teens, and young adults themselves just trying to figure it all out.

It's also important to know about your own roots, and learn as much as you can about the story of how you came to be. We absorb and learn a lot of our values from our grandparents and the stories they tell us about their younger years. Finding photos, letters, and other old documents that help give those stories texture helps keep them alive in our memories and ensure their lessons live on with even greater potency.

"I was so touched by this resume because I always knew him at the tail end of his impressive life and it was so fascinating to see how he started," Shisko told Newsweek. "I hope people see the resume as a way to relate. Human behavior is a through line and people are generally similar, if not also products of the time they live in. This resume is indicative of just a 23-year-old man putting an unpolished, slightly embellished version of himself on paper, hoping to start a life and make a living."