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Youth Collaboratory

Sex trafficking of youth still happens today. Here's why it's difficult to escape.

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MANY

Imagine waking up to smoke filling your room. What would you do? The answer might seem obvious at first — you'd look for the nearest exit.

But it's not always that simple.

What if your partner, pets, or your children were also inside? Would you still be so quick to look for a way out, or would you first focus on finding a way to help them get out too — even if that meant doing something dangerous?


What if all the exits were engulfed by flames, making your escape even more dangerous than simply staying put and calling for help?

Photo by Олег Жилко/Unsplash.

Or what about if the downed powerline you can see from the window, which caused the fire in the first place, made it risky to step outside? What if your only exit was through a window, which would require that you fall three stories before reaching the ground?

Now imagine there were other voices chiming in. What if someone you loved told you not to worry — that it was just dinner that they burnt in the oven? What if someone you trusted asked, “What smoke? I don't see any. Are you sure there's smoke?" Would you still be looking for an exit?

It's easy to think that if we were in a dangerous situation, we'd know exactly what to do.

But there are lots of factors that can change our actions — and sometimes, knowing what to do or when to leave isn't as immediately clear-cut.

This is why, for survivors of abuse, especially when they're under the age of 18, the question is rarely as simple as, “Do I leave?"

Young people who are sexually exploited — manipulated, forced, or pressured into performing sexual acts for money or other resources like food, shelter, or support — are especially vulnerable, as their survival is often bound to the same person who's exploiting them.

Minors have an additional set of challenges, as they often have fewer resources and greater vulnerability as they aren't yet adults.

Photo by Alex Iby/Unsplash.

For those youth, “Do I leave?" is just one question among a million they'll be faced with. They'll need to know where they'll go next, if it's safe to leave, who they can trust, and if they have the resources to survive, assuming that they realize they're victims in the first place.

While help exists for survivors, each one of us has a part to play in supporting them. If we were all better informed about their struggles, we could more readily step up to build communities of support around them.

So, like with the smoke-filled room, maybe the better question to ask is: what obstacles prevent victims from safely leaving their exploiters? Here are 13 reasons why they might struggle to get help:

1. They might not see themselves as victims at all.

The psychological tactics that an exploiter might use can make it difficult for victims to realize they're being exploited at first. This process, called “grooming," ensures that an abuser has earned their victim's trust and dependency before escalating the abuse.

They do this through offering affection, gifts, shelter, food, or any kind of resources that a victim might need physically or emotionally. It's only when their victim is dependent that the abuse escalates — and by then, it's likely that the victim is bonded to their abuser.

2. In some cases, exploitation is already normalized.

While youth sex trafficking happens in every state in the U.S., there are some communities where sexual exploitation happens more frequently — particularly in under-resourced areas. Victims in those communities may see it as a survival strategy, rather than a form of violence and exploitation.

“A lot of times these exploiters are coming out of similar communities," Lenore Jean-Baptiste, Community Engagement Specialist at the Nevada Partnership for Homeless Youth, explains. “[Some victims have] seen exploitation, but they called it 'pimping' . . . it becomes normalized [and assumed] this is the way it is."

If you grew up in an abusive home environment, too, it can be difficult to recognize the violence as it's taking place because you're already desensitized to it.

3. The culture at-large doesn't make this any better, either.

Girls and women especially are sexualized at increasingly younger ages. When they are encouraged at an early age to view their bodies as objects and their sexuality as a form of currency, Jean-Baptiste says, and conditioned to believe they do not have autonomy over their own bodies, they're more vulnerable to exploitation.

“The oversexualization of them and their bodies becomes glamorous," Jean-Baptiste explains. “They're tailored and groomed by an over-sexualized society."

As a result, she says, they're less likely to recognize the abuse as it's happening, and less likely to consider leaving.

4. Victims might be fleeing abuse or neglect, so they feel safer with their exploiter.

Many youth victims of trafficking are actually runaways. In some cases, the exploitation might initially feel more secure than the chaotic or even violent situations that led victims to run away in the first place, especially if their family members were the first to sexually exploit them — or are the exploiters in the situation.

“It's really common to hear that they've been made to exchange sex for a place to stay or food to eat — or that someone who offers them a couch to sleep on [only] later ends up abusing or assaulting them," Luke Hassevoort, Assistant Program Manager at Common Ground, explains.

“They're not viewing themselves as victims, because they're viewing the situation as survival," Jean-Baptiste says. “[Often times] they leave [home] to save their lives."

Survival should not require exploitation, though — and victims need to know that safety nets exist to protect them.

Youth Survivor, Youth Living Out Loud, program of Wraparound Milwaukee.

5. Victims might feel like their trafficker is the only person that's ever been accepting.

A history of abuse, neglect, or bullying can also create a vulnerability that traffickers can take advantage of, Jean-Baptiste says. By offering the illusion of love, acceptance, and nurturing that victims didn't have at home, traffickers create a bond that makes it very difficult for victims to leave.

This is especially true for youth trafficking victims who identify as LGBTQ+. Things like harassment, family rejection, and social isolation can drive LGBTQ+ people away from their communities, and can make traffickers seem like saviors rather than abusers.

Many communities have LGBTQ+ centers, though — which you can locate online — to find acceptance, resources, and support that a trafficker can never provide.

6. They might be reluctant to access services and support.

While being shuffled around, many youth aren't properly supported by educational, healthcare, juvenile justice, and welfare systems — sometimes all of the above, making it feel as though there's nowhere reliable to turn.

According to the National Foster Youth Institute, 60% of all child sex trafficking victims were, at some point, part of the child welfare system, and have fallen through the cracks.

This trauma can leave victims reluctant to reach out to social service providers. They might be afraid of seeking out help because they don't want to be placed back into the same system that they didn't feel protected them in the first place.

Traffickers may also position themselves as saviors that rescued them from the system, making victims feel trapped and indebted to them.

7. They might not trust law enforcement either.

Youth of color and those from under-resourced communities may have witnessed police brutality or racist altercations, making it difficult to see law enforcement as trustworthy.

Homeless youth, for example, might have been impacted when a police officer disrupted an encampment where they were staying, pressuring them to leave or disperse. For a young person with very little safety, this can feel destabilizing and even violent.

This could lead youth to view their exploiter as safer than law enforcement, leaving them reluctant to get help as their trafficker escalates the abuse.

Many law enforcement agencies haven't been properly trained to support exploited youth, either. They may not self-identify to law enforcement for many reasons including fear of arrest, fear of abuse from their trafficker, or immigration status.

Traffickers can even prey on this fear to keep victims from reaching out, feeding them a narrative that there's no one that can help them or be trusted. “A lot of times traffickers can use those kinds of stories and experiences to make individuals feel fearful," Jean-Baptiste explains.

[rebelmouse-image 19534910 dam="1" original_size="6000x3246" caption="Photo by Matt Popovich / Unsplash." expand=1]Photo by Matt Popovich / Unsplash.

8. They may not have anywhere to go.

Homeless youth are incredibly vulnerable to sex trafficking. Without the support and resources needed to survive, the idea of leaving their traffickers can feel impossible and even dangerous, particularly if their family members are their exploiters.

In that instance, family members may use the trust they've established to pressure youth into sexual acts to "provide" for the family — which, even when recognized as exploitation, can be difficult to leave without an established safety net.

This is further complicated by the reality that they may not be connected to their communities. This is especially true for homeless and foster youth. “Bouncing from place to place can make it tough to build lasting relationships [or] connect with a new school or neighborhood," Kendan Elliott, Program Manager at MANY, explains.

9. Their dependency on their exploiters might make it seem like there aren't other options.

Homelessness and poverty are both risk factors for trafficking, so it makes sense that escaping exploitation can be an uphill battle. Traffickers will use their resources to make their victims completely dependent on them, by offering things like food, emotional support, and shelter.

This can make exploitation appear to be better than any life victims had lived prior to being trafficked, or any kind of life they could build on their own when starting from square one.

[rebelmouse-image 19534911 dam="1" original_size="2510x1650" caption="Photo by Ev/Unsplash." expand=1]Photo by Ev/Unsplash.

“When you are faced with the choice of staying in a situation you know is messed up — or leaving with no money, no place to go, and no one you can call — what do you do?" Elliott explains. “It doesn't feel like a choice."

Victims can and do build extraordinary lives after exploitation, though. And local organizations offering housing options and other resources can help them take the first step.

10. They might have a disability that makes it challenging to recognize or escape exploitation.

Disabilities, both physical and mental, can complicate any form of violence.

For example, research has shown that girls with intellectual disabilities are at increased risk for sexual exploitation, because they are less likely to know what constitutes abuse — especially because exploiters are already very manipulative to begin with. They're less likely to self-identify as victims as a result.

Youth with physical disabilities are also more vulnerable to exploitation by their caretakers because they are dependent on them. They are more prone to isolation, which makes them easier targets with less of a support system to reach out to, and they may not be physically able to ask for help or leave.

Youth with mental illness are much more likely to be targeted as well, because traffickers can exploit their emotional vulnerability, lower self-esteem, or sense of isolation, to make victims even more dependent on them.

11. Their exploiter might have lured them into addiction.

Some traffickers use drugs to entice victims, and traffickers use their dependency to escalate and sustain the abuse. Alcohol or drug dependence only further complicates what is already a difficult situation to leave, giving traffickers one more resource, or threat, to hold over their heads.

Photo by Jair Lázaro / Unsplash.

12. They fear that no one will believe them.

“Boys and young men, trans girls and women, and youth of color overall are more likely to be identified as 'prostitutes' than victims of sex trafficking and exploitation," Elliott explains. “This is also the case with youth who have previous involvement with the foster care or justice systems, or have previous law enforcement contact (sometimes due to unmet mental health needs)."

Boys and young men can be and are exploited, but because masculinity is often associated with sexual aggression, many people don't realize that boys can be victims. Similarly, youth who are dependent on drugs or alcohol might fear that they will be viewed as “addicts" and punished, rather than helped.

In these cases, youth fear that their behavior will be seen as consensual or even criminal, and so, not only may it take longer for them to self-identify as victims, but it can also take them longer to reach out for help leaving their traffickers.

That said, all victims are exactly that — victims — regardless of the community they come from.

13. They've likely been failed by adults in their life before.

Getting help in the first place assumes that youth trust that there's someone who can help them.

One of the challenges in trying to estimate the number of youth that are trafficked in the United States is that, for some youth, they were never reported missing in the first place. Coming from places where adults just weren't invested in their well-being, it makes sense that youth might not trust that there are adults that care.

But support does exist — and there are people committed to helping victims find it.

[rebelmouse-image 19534913 dam="1" original_size="4608x3456" caption="Photo by Eye for Ebony/Unsplash." expand=1]Photo by Eye for Ebony/Unsplash.

“[There are] resources and [people] who can help them on the journey of recovery," Hassevoort says. That's why both Jean-Baptise and Hassevoort emphasize becoming familiar with the organizations in your own community.

“Community organizations can provide temporary assistance through [things like] motel vouchers," Hassevoort continues. As these organizations continue to expand, Hassevort notes, many offer critical tools, like counseling, art therapy, mind/body practices, and even job training and education.

But the real process starts with first breaking down the psychological barriers that leave survivors feeling as though they can't leave. Because the reality is, no matter how many attempts it takes, there is a better life waiting on the other side, and people who won't stop fighting for survivors until they find it.

“I have a colleague who often critiques the image of a trafficking victim with their wrist bound in chains," Hassevoort says. “She says that, in reality, the chains are on your mind, not [only] your wrists."

Breaking those chains takes time, but thankfully, you don't have to do it alone.

There is help and there are people who . . . do care," Jean-Baptise affirms.

If you believe that you or someone you know might be at risk or is being victimized, the National Human Trafficking Hotline can help.

You can text 233733, use the chat feature on their website, or call them at 888-373-7888. They can connect you with local organizations and support to figure out your next steps.

If there's any possibility that an abusive person has access to your phone or internet history, clear your internet history, and consider borrowing someone else's phone instead, or ask to access a phone at a place like a local library.

[rebelmouse-image 19534915 dam="1" original_size="5315x2990" caption="Photo by Kayle Kaupanger/Unsplash." expand=1]Photo by Kayle Kaupanger/Unsplash.

Taking those first steps can be scary, but your life and safety are worth it. Because as Jean-Baptiste puts it, “You deserve to be happy in every area of your life."

And you're worthy of that safety no matter what — there's nothing you have to do to earn it. You're already deserving exactly as you are.

When we are educated and vigilant, we can make a difference in our communities! Learn more about how to get involved, and help us work towards a future where youth are no longer victimized.

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Many of us yearn for a career that not only provides a livelihood but also contributes to a better world. We seek a sense of purpose, a way to use our skills and talents to make a meaningful difference in the lives of others and the health of our communities. But who orchestrates the initiatives that allow us to give back effectively? Behind the scenes of many successful initiatives advancing the common good are project managers.

Project managers, who are often equipped with certifications from organizations like the Project Management Institute (PMI), bring order and efficiency for complex projects. But project managers go beyond ensuring projects are executed on time and on budget – they make sure the project meets a higher need. Does it positively impact the community? Does it create ease or improve the lives of others? Their work is essential to maximizing the impact of initiatives that better our world.

To showcase the vital role project managers play in creating positive change, we spoke with two rising leaders who are going above and beyond to make a difference in their communities as project managers.

Zack Almer

Every day, 17 people in the U.S. die waiting for an organ transplant, with demand far outpacing supply. In the New York Metro area, Zachary Almer, MPA, PMP, is tackling this challenge head-on. As the Director of Strategic Project Management at LiveOnNY, an organ procurement organization for the greater New York City area, he helped execute a bold strategy that increased organ and tissue donations by 50% over the past two years—resulting in over 2,500 life-saving transplants and setting a new benchmark for what’s possible in healthcare.

“I really enjoy when someone says we need to get something done and there’s no one way to do it. That’s why I love project management, because it allows me to step into a situation where there’s a problem and I need to fix it.” Zack added, “I think if you’re in healthcare, most people have selfless aspirations by the nature of signing up for this work. As long as I have the experience to share, I want to give back.”

Prosperidade Sunguete

As project manager for Angola’s Ana Elisa Philanthropic Association, Prosperidade Sunguete drives initiatives focused on sustainable development and community advancement, encompassing support for children, widows, environmental preservation, health, and education.

In 2023, Prosperidade set about closing the digital divide for children and young adults in Luanda’s Maiombe community after witnessing how little technology and food access the community had. The initiative, Technological Education for All, offers tech education and nutritious meals to over 150 young people from underprivileged backgrounds, granting the recipients greater digital literacy, food security and future learning and career opportunities.

“Every child deserves the opportunity to learn and thrive in an increasingly digital world. Empowering kids through tech education, while also guaranteeing them a daily hot meal, helps give them a leg up to be qualified for future educational and professional opportunities that would not have been available to them otherwise,” Prosperidade emphasized.

Prosperidade added, “project management is not just about meeting deadlines, but about creating lasting value and positive impact on the lives of the people involved as well.” The initiative, nominated for the 2023 Tigra Nova Garra Award, empowers youth and reflects Prosperidade's belief in the transformative power of education.

Project managers, equipped with on-the-job experience and resources from PMI, are the driving force behind social impact campaigns like Zack’s and Prosperidade’s, skillfully navigating challenges and ensuring successful completion. PMI empowers project professionals with skill-building resources like online courses and networking opportunities, validates their expertise with professional certifications, and celebrates their global impact as a global community.

Project Management Institute recognized Zack and Prosperidade for their impactful work alongside other rising trailblazing leaders who are driving global impact through innovative project management. Aspiring project managers seeking to make a difference can begin their journey with the Certified Associate in Project Management (CAPM) certification.

Robin Williams played inspiring English teacher John Keating in "Dead Poets Society."

As a Gen X parent of Gen Z teens and young adults, I'm used to cringing at things from 80s and 90s movies that haven't aged well. However, a beloved movie from my youth that I didn't expect to be problematic, "Dead Poets Society," sparked some unexpected negative responses in my kids, shining a spotlight on generational differences I didn't even know existed.

I probably watched "Dead Poets Society" a dozen or more times as a teen and young adult, always finding it aesthetically beautiful, tragically sad, and profoundly inspiring. That film was one of the reasons I decided to become an English teacher, inspired as I was by Robin Williams' portrayal of the passionately unconventional English teacher, John Keating.

The way Mr. Keating shared his love of beauty and poetry with a class of high school boys at a stuffy prep school, encouraging them to "seize the day" and "suck all the marrow out of life," hit me right in my idealistic youthful heart. And when those boys stood up on their desks for him at the end of the film, defying the headmaster who held their futures in his hands? What a moving moment of triumph and support.

My Gen Z kids, however, saw the ending differently. They loved the feel of the film, which I expected with its warm, cozy, comforting vibe (at least up until the last 20 minutes or so). They loved Mr. Keating, because how can you not? But when the movie ended, I was taken aback hearing "That was terrible!" and "Why would you traumatize me like that?" before they admitted, "But it was so gooood!"

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

The traumatize part I get—that film gets very heavy all of a sudden. But in discussing it further, I uncovered three main generational differences that impacted their "Dead Poets Society" viewing experience and what they took away from it.

1) Gen Z sees inspiring change through a systemic lens, not an individual one

The first thing my 20-year-old said when the credits rolled was, "What? That's terrible! Nothing changed! He got fired and the school is still run by a bunch of stodgy old white men forcing everyone to conform!" My immediate response was, "Yeah, but he changed those boys' individual lives, didn't he? He helped broaden their minds and see the world differently."

I realized that Gen X youth valued individuals going against the old, outdated system and doing their own thing, whereas Gen Z values the dismantling of the system itself. For Gen X, Mr. Keating and the boys taking a stand was inspiring, but the fact that it didn't actually change anything outside of their own individual experiences stuck like a needle in my Gen Z kids' craw.

2) Gen Z isn't accustomed to being blindsided by tragic storylines with no warning

To be fair, I did tell them there was "a sad part" before the movie started. But I'd forgotten how deeply devastating the last part of the movie was, so my daughter's "Why would you do that to me?!" was somewhat warranted. "I thought maybe a dog would die or something!" she said. No one really expected one of the main characters to die by suicide and the beloved teacher protagonist to be blamed for it, but I'd somehow minimized the tragedy of it all in my memory.

But also to be fair, Gen X never got any such warnings—we were just blindsided by tragic plot twists all the time. As kids, we cheered on Atreyu trying to save his horse from the swamp in "The Neverending Story" only to watch him drown. Adults showed us "Watership Down" thinking it would be a cute little animated film about bunnies. We were slapped in the face by the tragic child death in "My Girl," which was marketed as a sweet coming of age movie.

Gen Z was raised in the era of trigger warnings and trauma-informed practices, while Gen X kids watched a teacher die on live TV in our classrooms with zero follow-up on how we were processing it. Those differences became apparent real quick at the end of this movie.

3) Gen Z fixates on boundary-crossing behavior that Gen X overlooked

The other reaction I wasn't expecting was the utter disdain my girls showed for Knox Overstreet, the sweet-but-over-eager character who fell for the football player's cheerleader girlfriend. His boundary-crossing attempts to woo her were always cringe, but for Gen X, cringe behavior in the name of love was generally either overlooked, tolerated, or sometimes even celebrated. (Standing on a girl's lawn in the middle of the night holding a full-volume stereo over your head was peak romance for Gen X, remember.) For Gen Z, the only thing worse than cringe is predatory behavior, which Knox's obsessiveness and pushiness could be seen as. My young Gen X lens saw him and said, "That's a bit much, dude. Take it down a notch or three." My Gen Z daughters' lens said, "That guy's a creepo. She needs to run far the other way."

On one hand, I was proud of them for recognizing red flag behaviors. On the other hand, I saw how little room there is for nuance in their perceptions, which was…interesting.

My Gen Z kids' reactions aren't wrong; they're just different than mine were at their age. We're usually on the same page, so seeing them have a drastically different reaction to something I loved at their age was really something. Now I'm wondering what other favorite movies from my youth I should show them to see if they view those differently as well—hopefully without them feeling traumatized by the experience.

Former medic and single mom Leah Moore and her children being honored during the 2024 Keys to Progress event.

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In 2023, Leah Moore was struggling. A single mom and former medic in the Texas Air National Guard, Leah had no family support where she lived in Seattle, WA, which made raising her two girls and working full-time a significant challenge. When her only car broke down, Leah found herself struggling more than ever.

But in 2024, Leah’s burden became a little lighter. Moore is now one of many veterans that have been honored during this year’s Keys to Progress event, an annual giveaway that took place in over 60 cities across the country. Along with Moore, close to 100 other veterans and their families recieved the keys to free, reliable transportation as a thank you for their military service.

Providing reliable transportation to deserving veterans who’ve protected our country

According to the US Department of Transportation, approximately 40 percent of veterans live in rural areas where affordable transportation options are limited. Limited transportation can greatly affect a veteran’s quality of life, since reliable transportation is necessary for work, medical care, and other services.

Gail Nicholson, a veteran who served in the United States Army during the Persian Gulf Crisis from 1993 - 1997, knows this challenge personally. Gail relied on public transportation as she supported her family since the COVID-19 pandemic when her mother fell extremely ill. As a senior citizen, traveling by bus, with schedules and lines that are not always accessible, it has not always been easy.

With veterans like Gail Nicholson in mind, Progressive founded the Keys to Progress event in 2013, hoping to alleviate some of these common struggles that veterans face every day. Now, Gail will be able to care for her family and travel freely without the need for public transit.

Veteran Gail Nicholson at the 2024 Keys to Progress event.

How the dream of independence becomes a reality

There’s no doubt that access to a car can make anyone’s life easier—but it also comes with additional expenses that require additional financial commitment. To help with this, multiple organizations have come together with Progressive to make Keys to Progress possible.

First, local charities and Veracity Research Co. Investigations (VRC), a veteran-owned and operated company, help to identify deserving veterans in each region. Once the recipients are chosen, Insurance Auto Auctions, Inc. (IAA) provides a Powertrain 12-month protection plan for all donated vehicles, while 1-800-Charity Cars donates resources to help with vehicle titling and registration. Enterprise, a rental car company, pays for the insurance for each donated vehicle for the first six months, and Progressive writes the insurance policies funded by Enterprise. Finally, the gently used vehicles are donated through Charity Cars.

The result is a well-deserved gift that enables each veteran to get back on the road and move ahead in life as easily as possible.

Supporting veterans on the road and beyond

Sometimes too, a veteran needs an assist in getting their small business off and running as well. Through Keys to Progress, Progressive has also donated three tractor trailers to worthy recipients.

Lt. Colonel Rose a 30-year U.S. Marine Corps veteran, was the 2022 recipient of a commercial through the Keys to Progress program. He shared, “Since being selected as the 2022 Keys to Progress recipient, the vehicle has exceeded all expectations of being an owner operator. Myself, including so many others, have been blessed by this magnificent machine. This blessing has catapulted my business forward, the donation of operating costs has played a significant part in minor repair costs along with being able to forgo a truck payment.”

Lt. Colonel Rose has been able to grow his trucking business to a second truck and he is working to purchase a third due to the revenue made from being a Keys to Progress recipient. He has also taken his earnings to donate to various charities and is inspired by showing his appreciation and patriotism for the United States.

But Keys to Progress is truly a passion project, and one that has impacted many deserving veterans. Collectively, Progressive has been able to donate vehicles to more than 1,100 military families, in addition to gifting three fully-loaded commercial trucks to veteran truck drivers and 28 commercial vehicles to select veteran organizations.

Cars at Progressive's annual Keys to Progress event.

“Our Keys to Progress initiative is a wonderful example of Progressive's purpose to help people move forward and live fully," said Tricia Griffith, President and Chief Executive Officer of Progressive. "We're proud to be celebrating our 12th year of supporting veterans and will present almost 100 well-deserving veterans and their families with keys to a vehicle that will provide them reliable transportation to get on the road and move forward in life."

Whether it’s for veterans like Leah or Gail, Keys to Progress is continuing to showcase its commitment to driving progress on the road and providing transportation for veterans, military-related organizations, and veteran-owned small business owners across the country for years to come.

Whether it’s for veterans like Leah, Gail, or Lt. Colonel Rose, Keys to Progress is continuing to showcase its commitment to driving progress for veterans, military-related organizations, and veteran-owned small business owners across the country for years to come.

https://www.canva.com/photos

Gotta save a few of these.

Ah Gen Z, the age group known for their brutal TikTok roasts (mostly of millennials) and their attitude towards workplace professionalism that’s just a tad, shall we say, more casual than previous generations. While this attitude might be jarring at times, it also can be delightfully refreshing.

Just ask the company Oilshore, which recently shared the hilarious “out of office” messages created by its Gen Z employees.

Whether they chose a clever, tongue-in-cheek approach, like “On vacation. Hoping to win the lottery and never return,” or something more direct and borderline threatening ala “Do not contact me while I’m on leave or I’ll report you to HR,” these Gen Z workers made their message loud and clear.

To no one’s surprise, the responses struck a particularly strong chord with millennials.

“They are so bold, I love it. As a millennial I be scared to be off of work,” one wrote.

Another added, “I wish I had this direct attitude but my millennial self would never be able to do that.”

Yet another praised these workers, saying, “Xennial here thinking Gen Z’s doing all the things I’ve dreamt of doing. Kings and queens changing work culture.”

@oilshore Here at Oilshore we value honesty 🙈 #corporatetiktok #genzworker #workhumour #officelife ♬ Spongebob Tomfoolery - Dante9k Remix - David Snell


Indeed, while Gen Zers might often get labeled as lazy or entitled, they are inspiring some pretty positive disruption. According to a Stanford Report, this generation prioritizes collaboration, mental health and work-life balance, transparency, and social impact and are demanding to see these types of changes in the workforce. That’s more than evident in these “out of office” messages.

Here’s another video with even more fun ones. Feel free to use some of these yourself, if you dare.

@oilshore Replying to @Rik O'Smithwick well at least they are being honest 😳 #workhumour #genzworker #corporatetiktok ♬ Coconut Mall (From "Mario Kart Wii") - Arcade Player

"Enjoying life! Will be back when I run out of money!" might be the truest sentence ever written.

But wait, there’s more where that came from. These Gen Z workers also have some pretty awesome email sign-offs for when they're finally back in the office. I will be stealing “mean regards” immediately.

@oilshore Anything is better than ‘regards’ #genz #genzemployee #workhumour #officehumout #genzoffice ♬ Borderline - Tame Impala

In many ways, Gen Zers’ workplace values don’t differ that much from that of their post-Boomer predecessors. But there are other factors at play, like coming of age in the wake of a historic pandemic and the worldwide threat of climate change, as well as unprecedented digital connectivity that make all these events more visible, which undoubtedly influence their relentlessness in getting these needs met.

And thank goodness for that relentlessness, because it makes work a better place to be—in more ways than one.

Follow @oilshore on TikTok for even more funny workplace-related content.


This article originally appeared last year.

Photo by frank mckenna on Unsplash

Carlo and Sarah share their cross-cultural relationship hilarities on TikTok.

When cultures come together, sometimes it can be challenging, sometimes it can be beautiful and sometimes it can be hilarious. For one couple, highlighting the hilarity of their American-Italian love story has endeared them to millions of people around the world.

It all started when Sarah, who is American, went to southern Italy to visit family members who live there. Carlo worked as a lifeguard at the beach club his family owns where Sarah's family would go. He barely spoke English, but he asked Sarah on a date in the summer of 2019. They basically became inseparable for the rest of the summer.

Sarah returned to the U.S. and Carlo surprised her with a month-long visit in the fall. Their long-distance relationship was supposed to get a reprieve when she was to return to Italy in May 2020, but pandemic travel restrictions destroyed that plan.

They ended up meeting up in Ireland during the summer of 2020, one of the only places allowing both Americans and Italians to travel. That's where Carlo proposed.

Their wedding plans also got thwarted by COVID-19. They got married in Italy, but without Sarah's family and friends able to attend. They had their second wedding, with family and friends in attendance in October 2022 in the U.S.

- YouTube

But their cute love story is only one part of why they've grown a following of 4 million people on TikTok alone. The cross-cultural nature of their relationship regularly creates hilarious moments, from Carlo's confusion over English words and phrases to Sarah committing Italian food faux pas just to see his reactions.

@carloandsarah

@justinbaldoni @wayfarerstudios this is my #lovestory 🤍 #LoveWithNoLimits #longdistance #ldr #couple

Their playful energy is delightful, but people also can't get over Carlo calling Sarah "my love" over and over again.

In one of their first mega-viral videos, which has nearly 100 million views, Sarah breaks the pasta in half before she puts it into the water—a totally typical American thing to do—and Carlo nearly has a heart attack.

@carloandsarah

did someone say... DRAMA??? 🤣

Or how about the time Sarah suggested that she ask for pineapple on her pizza while in Italy and Carlo basically said he'd be forced to move out of the country if she did that?

@carloandsarah

Carlo has had it with me🤣

Italians have far more superstitious beliefs about luck than Americans do, which come out frequently in Sarah and Carlo's videos. For instance, you're not supposed to put a loaf of bread top-side down. And if you get a new car, you're supposed to put a jar of salt in the car to ward off "malocchio" (evil eye/bad luck).

@carloandsarah

YOU WANT MALOCCHIO?!🌶😡

Carlo's English has come a long way since they met—he started learning the language because he was interested in Sarah—but as with anyone learning any language, there are sometimes some funny misunderstandings.

For instance, calling a tall building a "scratchy sky."

@carloandsarah

Gelato with a nice view of scratchy sky😩😂

Or mistaken a seed for a seaman or…something else.

@carloandsarah

the SEA MAN😩🐟

There's often some confusion around which words are appropriate and which words aren't, which is illustrated no more clearly than how Carlo reacted to saying the word "peacock."

@carloandsarah

THE WAY HE YELLED IT💀

Cultures may clash sometimes, but cross-cultural relationships can also create humorous moments that highlight the human side of all of us.

Sarah and Carlo even came up with a way to "fight" without having to understand one another's languages at all.

@carloandsarah

You should try it out💀

You can follow Sarah and Carlo on TikTok, YouTube and Instagram.

This article originally appeared three years ago.

A dad got a sweet note from a fellow father after camping with his kids.

One of the hardest parts of being a parent is never being sure whether you're doing a good job or totally bombing it. If you're conscientious enough to even wonder if you're a good parent, you probably are, but parenting entails a million little choices and interactions, and there's always a lingering voice in your head saying, "What if you're really screwing this whole thing up?"

Reassurance and encouragement are always appreciated by parents, but not always received, which is why a note from one camping dad to another has people celebrating the kindness of anonymous strangers.

"You are killing it as a dad."

Someone on Yosemite Reddit thread shared a photo of a handwritten note with the caption, "To the man who left this thoughtful note on my windshield at Lower Pines Campground this weekend, I extend my heartfelt gratitude; your acknowledgment of my efforts to be a good father means a great deal to me."



The note reads:

"Bro,

I camped in the spot behind you last night. Let me just say, you are killing it as a dad. First off, I watched your wife guide you in as you backed up your trailer and nailed it on the first try without any yelling. Then your kids unloaded from the truck and were mild-mannered and well behaved. You told stories around the campfire and I had the pleasure of listening to the sounds of giggles and laughter.

From one dad to another, you are killing it. Keep it up.

P.S. Whatever you cooked for dinner smelled delicious!"

How often do we share these thoughts with strangers, even if we have them? And who wouldn't love to get a surprise bit of praise with specific examples of things we did right?

Everyone needs to hear a compliment once in a while.

So many people found the note to be a breath of fresh air and a good reminder to compliment people when we feel the urge:

"That would make any daddy's eyes water."

"It’s always nice, as a guy, to get a compliment."

"I complimented a guy's glasses at work (I'm also a guy, and btw they were really cool glasses, I wasn't just being nice) and now he keeps trying to tell me where he got his glasses and how I should get some. But I'm just having to be polite because I already have glasses and I'm not in the market. I finally had to tell him I'm not going to buy them lmao I just like them on him.

Made me feel like that's the first compliment he's had in years because he can't stop talking about it. Also I mainly liked the glasses because I think he's cute but he really thinks it's just the glasses haha jokes on him that cute bastard."

"I was in the store with my wife and one of our 'adopted nephews' yesterday (we’re close friends with his parents and we’ve known him and his brother since they were newborns and 2yo, respectively). A woman came up to me at checkout while my wife was running out to the car and said 'I’m not sure what your family relationship is here, but I just have to tell you how nice and refreshing it is to hear all the laughter and joy from the 3 of you. You both seem like such a good influence on him and it warms my heart.' It’s such a small thing but as a dude, I can’t remember the last time someone gave me a compliment in public and it made my freaking day."

"10/10 letter. The and not yelling part gave me a good chuckle lol."

"We need so much more of men getting such heartfelt and sincere compliments. Thanks for sharing. ❤️"

"I’ve never considered leaving a note, but when I see a harmonious family with good parenting, it’s healing for me. My childhood was awful."

"Such an awesome compliment! Even though I don't have children myself, I like to remind my friends too that they're doing great & it brings them happy tears."

"This made me cry. I love that you are getting your 'flowers.' My dad sucked, I’m so glad you are one of the good ones."

"This made me cry too. It’s so hard to be a human. Let alone a parent. Getting a good job sticker every now and then really means a lot these days."

"I'm a big bearded guy and I would cry if I got this note. More people like this, please."

The best part of this story is that no one knows who the dad who wrote the note is, not even the dad who shared it. It wasn't written for clout or notoriety, it wasn't to get attention or make himself look good. No name or signature, just an anonymous act of kindness to uplift a stranger whether he needed it or not.

We all need to hear or read kind things said about us, and sometimes it means even more coming from an anonymous stranger who has nothing to gain by sharing. A good reminder to share it when you feel it—you never know how many people you may move and inspire.

This article originally appeared last year.

Parenting

Mom shows the heart-wrenching reality of kids being left out of class birthday party invites

"I'm sad for you cause that's not nice. That's not how we treat other people, right?"

Mom shows heartbreaking reality of preschool 'mean girls'

A heartbroken mom starts an important conversation about the impact of excluding children after her daughter reveals she was the only child not invited to a classmates birthday party. Nothing hurts a parent's heart like seeing your child cry after someone hurts their feelings. You know the day will come at some point but nothing ever quite prepares you for how you will handle it once it happens.

Young children don't understand why they're being left out of things or why someone would purposely hurt their feelings so it can hit them hard. Alyssa Miller came to the abrupt realization that her daughter was the odd girl out in class after she tearfully confesses she wasn't invited to a classmates birthday party. In the video shared to social media, Miller starts recording in the middle of the conversation while the two are sitting in the car after school pick up.

"How do you know you didn't get invited," the mom asks, to which her daughter replies through tears, "she told me." This revelation is clearly a little jarring for Miller but she tries to remain light and comforting for her child, explaining that it wasn't nice for the other child to say that. While Miller's daughter is only in Voluntary Pre Kindergarten (VPK), this type of exclusionary behavior isn't new for little kids.

Sad Married At First Sight GIF by LifetimeGiphy

"That's not how we treat other people right? And you're so beautiful and you're so kind, okay? This has nothing to do with you and everything to do with them, okay? I love you. You're worthy of great, amazing friends, okay? Sometimes they just take a while to find," the mom says through tears while hugging her crying daughter.

This increase in bullying behaviors in girls as young as five years old has been being discussed for decades. In a study published in 2020 by the National Library of Medicine the authors explain, "Younger preschoolers also exhibit relatively simple and direct relational aggression, such as directly telling a peer they cannot play with them, whereas older preschoolers and school age children start to show more complicated relational aggression, such as playing nice upfront but disseminating malicious rumors behind the back."


@alyssa_miller01 I debated on whether or not to share this. But my girl is just so heart broke. Raising your child to think it’s acceptable to intentionally leave out another child and make them feel less than is something I will never be ok with. Teach your babies to be kind and welcoming to everyone. I thought I would have YEARS before something like this happened but sadly here we are in VPK. #kindness #teachkindness #bekind #bullies #bully #leftout #kidsoftiktok #parentsoftiktok #momsoftiktok ♬ original sound - Lyss

Unfortunately, this type of exclusionary behavior is what Miller's daughter experienced at preschool. In the mom's caption she shares that she knew this day would come but she wasn't expecting it so soon.

"I debated on whether or not to share this. But my girl is just so heart broke. Raising your child to think it’s acceptable to intentionally leave out another child and make them feel less than is something I will never be ok with. Teach your babies to be kind and welcoming to everyone. I thought I would have YEARS before something like this happened but sadly here we are in VPK," she writes.

youtube love GIF by SoulPancakeGiphy

Miller's emotional response to her daughter's pain resonated with other parents who offered the duo support in the comments. Even pop star Meghan Trainor offered support writing in all caps, "ILL INVITE HER OMG TELL HER I LOVE HER," complete with four sobbing emojis.

"Her fixing your hair after you fixed hers, you’re modeling such kindness and love for her, she’s going to be such an emotionally intelligent and kind grownup," one person says.

"You told her all the right things mama how heartbreaking," another chimes in.


Sad Cry GIFGiphy

"This happened to my son, all the kids talked about it at pickup and my son hid behind me crying. Thankfully the teacher reached out to all the parents and said it's unacceptable and not right," someone else shares.

"Oh my gosh! My heart broke!! You’re such a good mama! I loved that you told her It has nothing to with her and everything to do with them!! Please let baby girl know that she is so so loved," a commenter offers.

There were plenty of invites from across the country from people offering to throw the girl her own party to authors wanting to send children's books. The support Miller received from her tearful moment with her daughter was palpable. Hopefully after this negative experience the little girl will have much happier days ahead with friends that will always want her to come to their birthday parties.