upworthy
Joy

A pilot comforted his fearful passengers with this pitch-perfect pre-flight announcement

They should say this on every flight.

a pilot sitting in the cockpit; view of a plane seat aisle
Unsplash

A pilot addressed everyone's very real fears in such a validating way.

Flying is a little scary even during the best of times. While statistically extremely safe compared to driving and other forms of transportation, lots of us feel extra anxious and vulnerable so high off the ground and with so little control over what happens. Add in stories over the past few years about planes malfunctioning and rising questions about the reputation of Boeing, a leading name in aircraft manufacturing, and anxiety is at a high. Some estimates say about 25 million adults suffer from a legitimate phobia of flying, and even if you're not one of them, I'd be willing to bet you grip the armrest extra tight when your plane hits some unexpected turbulence!

Matters weren't helped with two tragic, high-profile plane crashes on U.S. soil in the past couple of days. With nerves running high on regularly scheduled flights over the world, one pilot is going viral for his thoughtful response to shaken passengers.

Captain Jeffrey Collins on American Airlines Flight 1044 got on the PA for his usual pre-flight spiel, and quickly took a detour.

A TikTok user and passenger on the plane, Leighton Mixon, was able to capture most of the announcement on camera. Whereas pilots usually give you a quick update on the weather and let you know if things are on schedule, Collins decided to briefly speak from the heart just three days after a fatal midair collision in Washington, D.C. captured headlines — also involving an American Airlines flight.

"[Some of you] may be fearful about flying and that's certainly understandable," the pilot began. "But just please know that my first officer and our flight attendants and myself place your safety and responsibility of carrying you to Miami, to your to families or vacations or your meetings, on the highest level. I have no higher calling than carefully, professionally transporting you today."

"So with that, relax and enjoy."

@leighterhaters

Life is short, hug your people ❤️ whoever is the pilot on AA1044 to MIA, i love you #unitedbywings #americanairlines #blackhawk #crash75 #planecrash #aviation #flightcrew #flightattendant

Mixon, who filmed the event, told Today that everywhere he went in the airport that day, people were talking about the recent crash, and there was a dark fog hanging over everyone he met. "The airport just felt a little quieter. It felt a little somber." The pilot's announcement, while seemingly simple, meant the world to many of the nervous passengers aboard the flight.

“It was like every fear and anxiety I had, it felt like he was speaking to me, like, it literally felt like he was speaking directly to me. I looked around, and it was like every single person on this flight needed to hear that. I think every single person needs to hear this. It was just kind of magic," said Mixon. “I looked up, and I don’t think I saw a dry eye on the plane.”

The video touched the hearts of plenty of people not onboard Flight 1044, as well, racking up a staggering 11 million views. Responses poured in as people were so grateful for the pilot's reassuring words.

pilot and copilot inside airplane cockpitThousands of planes fly successfully worldwide every day, but that doesn't always assuage fears. Photo by Kenny Eliason on Unsplash

"'I have no higher calling' is POETRY," wrote one user

"This is the PERFECT response to this tragedy. So professional, empathetic and calm. So thankful for pilots like this," said another.

"His voice sounds like it broke when he said he had no higher calling 🥺 his heart is so so heavy," someone chimed in.

"Pilots are really some amazing people. To take on that responsibility, of having so many souls in their hands, has got to be a tremendous amount of pressure," another user added.

Flight attendants and other flight professionals also commented on the video and explained that crews all over the country and world were taking similar measures to reassure passengers, even as their own hearts were heavy and scared. Skye Bolton, a flight attendant with American Airlines, said: "All of our pilots did that yesterday.. my pilot took the extra time to brief us yesterday to make sure we were all okay to work and made a beautiful announcement to the passengers once they were on. ... They care for not only us but for you. Y’all [are] why we fly and we know everyone was scared and worried."

One of the most comforting things when you're flying is remembering that the pilots are human beings.

Of course they take landing the plane safely seriously—they're on it, too, and they want to get home and see their own families at the end of the day. But we don't really see or hear from them very often and so it's easy to forget.

Beyond that, pilots take the responsibility they have extraordinarily seriously. The Air Line Pilots Associated features a code of ethics their pilots abide by, including, "If disaster should strike, they will take whatever action they deem necessary to protect the lives of their passengers and crew."

Airports and airplanes are stressful, anxious places that can sometimes bring out the worst behavior in people, but count me as someone who hopes commercial airplanes never go full autopilot. Knowing there's a highly-trained flight crew onboard that cares deeply about keeping everyone safe makes a world of difference. Kudos to this pilot for taking a minute to remind all of us.


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Modern Families

Fed up parents explain why they 'never want to bring the kids over' to visit

Can't you guys come to us for once?

Photo by Johnny Cohen on Unsplash

It's a good news/bad news situation for parents of young kids. The good news? Everyone wants to spend time with the kids! Grandparents, aunts and uncles, friends. They all want a relationship and lots of special moments with the little ones.

The bad news? One phrase: "When are you bringing them over?" Parents have been frustrated by the expectations of orchestrating stressful visits for generations — loading the kids in a car or on an airplane only to spend hours chasing them around in an un-baby-proofed environment and watching routines go to hell.

Now they're sounding off on social media and airing their grievances.

Why visiting grandparents and other relatives is so challenging for parents

A mom recently took to Reddit to vent about everyone in her life wanting her to "bring the kids to them."

"My parents live 30 mins away and always bug me about not coming to visit them," she writes. They constantly ask, "Why don't you bring our granddaughter to come see us?"

The fascinating discussion highlights a few things that make arranging visits with young kids a potential nightmare for parents.

Grandparents' houses are rarely childproofed

Grandparents love their breakable decor! Ceramic doo-dads, glass vases everywhere. They can't get enough. And while they should be able to decorate their house however they see fit (they've earned the right!) that doesn't make it a good environment for toddlers and babies.

Ceramic bowlsThe breakable decor found in every grandparents' houseozalee.fr/Flickr

"Last week was the last straw, I took my daughter to my parents and of course she went EVERYWHERE! flooded their toilet, broke a vase, and tried multiple times to climb their furniture," the Reddit mom writes.

Parents in a foreign environment are on constant safety duty and can rarely sit down

Let's be honest. Sometimes these "visits" are hardly worth the effort. After all, it's hard to get much catch up time when you're dutifully chasing your kid around.

"They don’t understand that my 3 yo ... is absolutely wild," writes another user in the thread. "She has no self preservation and nothing we do works. She doesn’t listen, she throws, she bites, she refuses to use the potty. It’s exhausting and then ... they expect us to entertain them, when I’m trying to just keep my kid from jumping off the stairs and into an ER visit."

Even just putting the kids in the car for a 20-minute drive is more work than it seems

Taking the kids out of the house requires packing a bag, bringing extra clothes, loading up on snacks, etc.

It seems easy to "pop over" but it actually absorbs the majority of the day between prep, visit, and aftermath.

Naps and routines go to hell

Parents with babies and toddlers know all too well — there is a price to pay for taking the kids out of the house for too long.

Chances are, the baby won't nap in a strange environment and then you're stuck with a cranky kid the rest of the night.

Kids with special needs require even more consistency

Kids with autism or ADHD can really struggle outside of their zone of safety. They might become severely dysregulated, have meltdowns, or engage in dangerous behaviors.

Explaining and mediating the generational divide

man in gray sweater sitting beside woman in black and white floral long sleeve shirt Photo by Tim Kilby on Unsplash

Why is this a conflict almost all parents can relate to?

Is this a Boomer vs Millennials thing?

Some experts think that generational values and traditions might play a role.

"Many Boomers were accustomed to more traditional, hierarchical family dynamics, where visiting grandparents was a way for the younger generation to show respect," says Caitlin Slavens, a family psychologist.

But that's not to say this is a new problem. I can remember my own parents driving me and my brothers over an hour to visit my grandparents seemingly every other weekend, but very few occasions where they came to visit us. It must have driven my parents nuts back then!

Plus, it's easy to forget that it's hard for older people to travel, too. They may have their own issues and discomforts when it comes to being away from their home.

"But for today’s parents, balancing careers, kids’ routines, and the demands of modern parenting is a much bigger undertaking. Grandparents might not always see how childproofing their space or making the trip themselves could make a huge difference, especially considering how travel and disruption can impact younger kids' moods and routines," Slavens says.

"So yes, this divide often comes down to different expectations and life experiences, with older generations potentially not seeing the daily demands modern families face."

Is there any hope for parents and grandparents coming to a better understanding, or a compromise?

"First, open conversations help bridge the divide—explain how much of a difference it makes when the kids stay in a familiar space, especially when they’re very young," suggests Slavens.

"Share practical details about the challenges, like childproofing concerns or travel expenses, to help grandparents see it from a parent’s perspective. You might even work together to figure out solutions, like making adjustments to create a more child-friendly space in their home or agreeing on a shared travel plan."

Ultimately, it's a good thing when grandparents, friends, and other relatives want to see the kids.

We all have the same goal.

"It’s helpful to approach the topic with empathy, focusing on everyone’s goal: more quality time together that’s enjoyable and low-stress for everyone involved. For parents, it’s about setting boundaries that work, and for grandparents, it’s about recognizing that flexibility can really show the parents that you are ... willing to make adjustments for their children and grandchildren."

Enjoyable, low-stress quality time — that's something everyone can get behind.

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Pop Culture

Crafty cat mom builds a Wes Anderson inspired 'mini bedroom' for her kitty

Most human bedrooms aren't this cool.

@taylorquitara/TikTok

This is next level cat parenting.

Listen, do pet parents need to go out of their way to provide extravagant indulgences for their fur baby in order for them to feel loved? No. But is it incredibly fun—inspiring, even—to watch when they do? Absolutely.

Take for instance Taylor Quitara’s completely decked out “mini bedroom” for her cat Giuseppe. This ingenious idea sparked when Quitara noticed her feline friend took a liking to this mysterious nook in the wall of one of the bedrooms in her home. Considering the wall paper and small light already installed, it very well could have been a small cat bedroom previously.

Quitara, a multifaceted artist who clearly knows her way around DIY home decor, quickly got to work, swapping out the black and white wallpaper for a fun and whimsical pattern with zebras (which just so happened to feature in The Royal Tenenbaums), staining and assembling a toy bed she found from Ikea, buying a lovely blue couch that doubles as a scratching pad, installing a climbing gym, and even putting up a gallery wall.

Throughout her journey, which she shared on TikTok, it’s clear that this is a labor of love in the purest form. Quitara is having the time of her life applying all her creativity to making her fur baby’s life that much more enjoyable. And the results pretty much speak for themselves.

@taylorquitara his room is nicer than mine!!!! #interiordecor #homedecorideas #nycapartment ♬ White Winter Hymnal - Fleet Foxes

Ugh, cuteness overload! And while not every cat owner certainly doesn't need to apply this level of extra to their cat’s sanctuary, it is important that they do have some comfy places to just chill by themselves for an hour or two.

How to create the purrfect kitty sanctuary

You can go create one solid space, like Quitara’s mini bedroom or a small “catio,” or, alternatively, you can opt for multiple smaller hiding spaces throughout your home, so long as they provide a bit of peace and quiet—as well as scratching opportunities.

It’s great to have both vertical spaces that require climbing, such as a cat tree, hammock, shelf, or perch, as well as a small horizontal space for nestling in, like a small box or basket. Many cat parents leave a designated space for their cat under the bed in a closet, or at the bottom of a bookshelf, for instance. Point being: you can get creative with this.

It’s also worth noting that no matter what safe space you provide for kitty, they might not take to it overnight. Even Quitara noted that Giuseppe hasn’t actually slept in his mini bedroom yet. Still looks incredibly cool though.

And perhaps the bigger point in all this is—there’s so much joy, love, creative expression [insert any positive emotion you wish] to be had when we put our heart and soul into providing the best possible life for our pets. It’s not about just buying them the bougiest food or the most expensive toy on the market, but the amount of love and energy we contribute. And what an amazing gift it is to give that.

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Health

Motivation expert explains how two simple words can free you from taking things personally

You don't need to take responsibility for everything and everyone.

via TEDx SF/Flickr and TEDx SF/Flickr

Mel Robinson making a TED Talk.

Towards the end of The Beatles’ illustrious but brief career, Paul McCartney wrote “Let it Be,” a song about finding peace by letting events take their natural course. It was a sentiment that seemed to mirror the feeling of resignation the band had with its imminent demise.

The bittersweet song has had an appeal that has lasted generations and that may be because it reflects an essential psychological concept: the locus of control. “It’s about understanding where our influence ends and accepting that some things are beyond our control,” Jennifer Chappell Marsh, a marriage and family therapist, told The Huffington Post. “We can’t control others, so instead, we should focus on our own actions and responses.”

This idea of giving up control, or the illusion of it, when it does us no good, was perfectly distilled into 2 words that everyone can understand as the “Let Them” theory. Podcast host, author, motivational speaker and former lawyer Mel Robbins explained this theory perfectly in a vial Instagram video.

“I just heard about this thing called the ‘Let Them Theory,’ I freaking love this,” Robbins starts the video.

“If your friends are not inviting you out to brunch this weekend, let them. If the person that you're really attracted to is not interested in a commitment, let them. If your kids do not want to get up and go to that thing with you this week, let them.” Robbins says in the clip. “So much time and energy is wasted on forcing other people to match our expectations.”

“If they’re not showing up how you want them to show up, do not try to force them to change; let them be themselves because they are revealing who they are to you. Just let them – and then you get to choose what you do next,” she continued.

The phrase is a great one to keep in your mental health tool kit because it’s a reminder that, for the most part, we can’t control other people. And if we can, is it worth wasting the emotional energy? Especially when we can allow people to behave as they wish and then we can react to them however we choose.

@melrobbins

Stop wasting energy on trying to get other people to meet YOUR expectations. Instead, try using the “Let Them Theory.” 💥 Listen now on the #melrobbinspodcast!! “The “Let Them Theory”: A Life Changing Mindset Hack That 15 Million People Can’t Stop Talking About” 🔗 in bio #melrobbins #letthemtheory #letgo #lettinggo #podcast #podcastepisode

How you respond to their behavior can significantly impact how they treat you in the future.

It’s also incredibly freeing to relieve yourself of the responsibility of changing people or feeling responsible for their actions. As the old Polish proverb goes, “Not my circus, not my monkeys.”

“Yes! It’s much like a concept propelled by the book ‘The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k.’ Save your energy and set your boundaries accordingly. It’s realizing that we only have “control” over ourselves and it’s so freeing,” 60DaysToLive2012 wrote.

“Let It Be” brought Paul McCartney solace as he dealt with losing his band in a very public breakup. The same state of mind can help all of us, whether it’s dealing with parents living in the past, friends who change and you don’t feel like you know them anymore, or someone who cuts you off in traffic because they’re in a huge rush to go who knows where.

The moment someone gets on your nerves and you feel a jolt of anxiety run up your back, take a big breath and say, “Let them.”


This article originally appeared last year.

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Joy

Irish couple got 'the chuckles' in video for daughter overseas. It's pure laughter therapy.

They couldn't keep it together in their baby shower message, even on their final attempt.

Representative photo credit: Canva

Sometimes you just can't keep it together.

Have you ever gotten the giggles at the most inopportune time, like when you're trying to do or say something serious? We've seen it happen to actors filming comedic scenes, news anchors during broadcasts, singers in church services, kids in spelling bees, and more. When the giggle bug bites, it bites hard, and keeping it together can sometimes feel like a superhuman feat.

That's what happened to a woman's parents in Ireland when they tried to make a heartfelt video greeting for her baby shower. The woman, Orla, was an expectant mother in Australia and her parents were creating a selfie video of love and encouragement as she got ready to welcome her little one. The problem was, neither of them could keep it together for longer than a few seconds at a time. And the best part is, it wasn't even their first try.

Her father said they'd spent 15 or 20 minutes trying to make the video and this was their final attempt. They weren't used to seeing themselves on video and it proved to be too funny to handle. But the best part is how the mom would say something heartfelt, like, "You're going to be wonderful parents," and then they'd both burst out laughing.

Watch:

People cannot get enough of their chuckles.

"Literally the best 2 min on the internet ever 😂😂😂. I love them so much. I’m so jealous of your baby for having the best grandparents on the planet. ❤️"

"And this is our final attempt that killed me. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣"

"It's the sincerely at the end for me. 😂"

"I don’t know how many time i have watched it today 😂😂. Maybe twenty 🤣🤣. Such lovely parents you have 😅😍."

"😂😂😂 love their laughter! You need to save this to show that baby some day!"

"If I had a video of my parents carrying on like this, I would cherish it forever!!"

Videos like this truly feel like laughter therapy, which is a legitimate thing. In fact, laughter therapy has been used by medical professionals in some form or another for centuries. According to the MayoClinic, laughter has the following short-term and long-term therapeutic benefits for both your mental and physical health:

In the short-term, laughter can:

  • Stimulate many organs. Laughter enhances your intake of oxygen-rich air, stimulates your heart, lungs and muscles, and increases the endorphins that are released by your brain.
  • Activate and relieve your stress response. A rollicking laugh fires up and then cools down your stress response, and it can increase and then decrease your heart rate and blood pressure. The result? A good, relaxed feeling.
  • Soothe tension. Laughter can also stimulate circulation and aid muscle relaxation, both of which can help reduce some of the physical symptoms of stress.

Long-term, laughter may:

  • Improve your immune system. Negative thoughts manifest into chemical reactions that can affect your body by bringing more stress into your system and decreasing your immunity. By contrast, positive thoughts can actually release neuropeptides that help fight stress and potentially more-serious illnesses.
  • Relieve pain. Laughter may ease pain by causing the body to produce its own natural painkillers.
  • Increase personal satisfaction. Laughter can also make it easier to cope with difficult situations. It also helps you connect with other people.
  • Improve your mood. Many people experience depression, sometimes due to chronic illnesses. Laughter can help lessen your stress, depression and anxiety and may make you feel happier. It can also improve your self-esteem.
So there you go. Viral videos that make you laugh aren't just a mindless time waster after all. Here's to loving parents, raucous chuckles, shared joy and that lucky baby of Orla's who has utterly delightful grandparents over in Ireland.
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Education

A school in Northern Ireland banned smartphones and the impact was tremendous

The "buzz" is back at Lisneal College.

via Smartphone Free Childhood Northern Ireland

Students are Lisneal College in Northern Ireland.

The world has hit an interesting turning point regarding young people and smartphone use, especially in schools. After 15-plus years of letting young people have smartphones on them all day long, we’re beginning to learn that they pose a serious threat to their mental health, social development, and academics.

The most startling research shows that right around 2012, when young people started using smartphones, the U.S. and other developed nations saw an astronomical spike in mental health problems among young people, including self-harm, suicide, psychological distress, anxiety, and depression. The change in behavior among students inspired Lisneal College in Northern Ireland to become the first school in the country to be phone-free. Lisneal College is a co-educational all-ability school for 11 to 18-year-olds.

"Since the introduction of smartphones, our concerns have gradually increased," Craig Johnson, VP for Pastoral Affairs at Lisneal, told Smartphone Free Childhood Northern Ireland. “For me, I'll never forget a clear turning point, where I walked into our school canteen one day, and we had all these students sitting in round tables with their friends and every one of them on their phone, canteen nearly deathly quiet. It was just this moment of reflection and going ‘We have to do something about this and we have to start somewhere.’"

The school administration contacted the students' parents, who shared the same concerns. However, the parents didn’t know how to address the problem.

In 2023, the school implemented a phone-free program for students from years 8 to 12 (grades 7 to 12 in America). Students place their phones in lock boxes upon arrival and cannot access them during the rest of the school day. At the end of the day, they can pick up their phones before they go home. After trying the program for one term, the parents were happy and even saw changes in their kids' attitudes towards technology at home.

What are the benefits of smartphone-free schools?

The large school has had very few concerns after implementing the policy besides some grumbling from older students. One of the older kids at the school, who gave administrators some of the most pushback, later changed their mind after one month. "I'll never forget one of our pupils who had given some of the most pushback said to me after a month, 'Sir, that's been a really good thing for me,'" Johnson said.

The teachers at the school love the policy as well. "Staff were immediately seeing a difference in their classrooms. They were immediately feeding back, 'This was a really good thing,'" Johnson said.

"Pupils are definitely more present in the classroom. They are more prepared and engaged to learn. They don't feel that they are the odd man out if they don't have a mobile phone. For any other schools looking to implement this policy, I say, 'Go for it.' It was a way forward for us, and I feel that it has been real positive. It has definitely benefitted myself, as a teacher, and it has benefitted pupils,” Emma Harper, a teacher at the school, told Smartphone Free Childhood Northern Ireland.



Principal Michael Allen says smartphones are a massive distraction for students, even in their pockets or purses. “If you can imagine sitting in a classroom with a mobile phone in your pocket, even if that phone is never out, and that mobile phone buzzes, rings, chimes,” he told the BBC. "No matter how focused you are as a student, whether you decide to take that phone out and look which some pupils may do, or even if you don’t, you spend the next two or three minutes thinking, ‘Who was that? I wonder who wants me?’"

Johnson says that since the ban, children are talking more to one another and that there is a positive "buzz" and energy at the school now. Gabriella, a year 11 student at the school, says there is much less bullying now that the phones are gone. "You're building better friendships and you're learning how to not be reliable on a phone to start a conversation. So it's a better way to socialize," she said.

"[Before the ban], people would have just stayed on their phones all day, and I know that happens in other schools as well. But here, since we've got the phones took away, people engage with the classes more and they engage with each other," Luke, a year-11 student, added.

Lisneal College’s bold move to ban smartphones has proven to be a huge win for students, teachers, administrators, and parents. Who doesn't want to go to a school where students focus on their teachers, lessons, and each other rather than on their phones? As other schools consider similar rules, Lisneal’s success shows that phone-free may be the best way forward.



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