upworthy
Joy

Men weigh in on the male equivalent of 'women's clothes don't have pockets'

"Why can’t I get a health/hygiene product that isn’t labeled something like 'grizzly bear fist fight sleep strips for tough men'?"

man putting on deodorant

""Women’s products smell like things while men’s products smell like concepts."

Few moments make a woman's face light up than the moment she realizes a dress she's trying on has pockets. It's such a simple thing, but it's like a whole world of possibilities opens up as soon as she slides her hands into those pockets and spins.

That's because women's clothes of all kinds so often don't have pockets. Even pants that look like they have pockets don't actually have pockets half the time, or the pocket is so tiny you can't even squeeze a quarter into it. And there's no real reason for this baffling reality for women—but is there an equivalent complaint for men?

Men were asked to weigh in on the male equivalent of "Why do women's clothes not come with pockets?" and a surprising number weighed in.


Why do men's products have vague, hyper-masculine names?

If something is made for men, it can't just be named what it is. It has to be over-the-top manly sounding.

"Why can’t I get a health/hygiene product that isn’t labeled something like 'grizzly bear fist fight sleep strips for tough men'?"

"'Dude Wipes' that cost double what a generic wet wipe costs. I don't get how anyone justifies that kind of wasteful spending these days."

"Strongman Righteous Fury Personal Cleansing Wipes."

"Right?! What focus group decided I wanted to smell like a bear's leather glove? Why is the bear wearing gloves to begin with? Was it going to do crime? I'm really not the criming type."

"Women’s products smell like things while men’s products smell like concepts."

"You mean you don't want to, 'smell like naval diplomacy'?"

"Yeah it's annoying. Soap marketed for women usually has what it smells like right on the bottle, while soap for men do not. When the bottle says 'XTREME ARCTIC SPORT' or 'HYDRA ENERGETIC' I have no idea what to expect."

"I use Old Spice 'Fiji and palm tree.' No idea what either of those smell like in real life, but at least the words resemble actual smells."

Why is men's formal wear oh-so-hot?

Not the good kind of hot—the sweating-at-a-wedding kind of hot.

"Men’s formal wear is really hot. Like if we go to a fancy wedding in the summer, I’m in a suit and tie, my wife is in a tiny dress."

"Was in an August wedding, 30+ celsius outside, bride wanted all the groom's party in wool suits. That day was hell."

"Yep. Undershirt, then dress shirt, then vest, then suit jacket."

"it really sucks at summer funerals. at least at a wedding its not like super rude to take your jacket off and roll your sleeves up."

"It's not just formal wear. Men don't have any short clothes that are 'acceptable' as more than casual wear. In offices, women can wear skirts when it's hot out. Men have no equivalent - they just have to sit there sweating with pants on."

"Women like it warm but their formal clothes are skimpy.

Men like it cool but their formal clothes have many layers.

Seems like it should be the other way around. Suit jackets and tuxedos for women, sheer dresses for men."

Why such a lack of variety in men's clothing overall?

Women seem to have infinite choices when it comes to style, color, etc. Men's fashion is much more limited, both in variety and quantity.

"The lack of variety for mens clothing in stores. Women's clothing will fill up 90% of the store while men get a tiny closed off section like here ya go guys"

"In the back of the store, next to the clearance aisle and the bathrooms."

"If the shop has multiple floors, it's always the one furthest from the ground floor. Usually the men's section also has to share the floor with the kid's and home decor sections!"

"For some reason, I always seem to find the men's section right next to shoes, which is usually 90% women's shoes. And the women's shoe section is still larger than the entire men's clothing section."

"Also in gym clothes. I feel like women has a vast variety in all kinds of colors and patterns that look amazing.

Men can pick between black, gray, navy blue, and white. And definitely no patterns at all."

"Sometimes there is green. Also, there might be both light gray and dark gray."

Why do clothing manufacturers assume men grow out as they grow up?

People come in all sizes regardless of gender, but since men's clothing styles are more limited, their sizing issues are notable.

"Stores assuming that if you're over 6 feet tall, you must also be 6 feet wide."

"This is the bane of my existence. Especially for work uniforms. If I go medium-sized shirt, it's way too small. If I get a large, then it looks like I'm wearing a parachute."

"Men's shirts get wider with each size but not longer."

"Similarly, if your shoulders are wider, your gut must be bigger."

"And the sleeve length to size ratio is all over the place. Trying shirt on and it's a little snug and the cuffs are in the middle of your forearms. Go up a size and the torso fits but the sleeves dangle at your knees... or they still don't reach your wrists."

"Yes. The men’s shirt paradox.

-Long enough

- Wide enough

- Sleeves/cuffs the correct length

(Pick any 2, but you never get all 3)."

Men added other things as well, such as jewelry options for men being boring, men's dress shoes having zero traction whatsoever (same goes for women's dress shoes, to be fair), men's bathrooms not coming with changing tables, and how annoying non-elongated toilets are. Women have far more things than "clothes without pockets" they could add to a list as well, which just highlights how hilariously absurd some of these gender-based constructs are.



Mel Robinson making a TED Talk.

Towards the end of The Beatles’ illustrious but brief career, Paul McCartney wrote “Let it Be,” a song about finding peace by letting events take their natural course. It was a sentiment that seemed to mirror the feeling of resignation the band had with its imminent demise.

The bittersweet song has had an appeal that has lasted generations and that may be because it reflects an essential psychological concept: the locus of control. “It’s about understanding where our influence ends and accepting that some things are beyond our control,” Jennifer Chappell Marsh, a marriage and family therapist, told The Huffington Post. “We can’t control others, so instead, we should focus on our own actions and responses.”

This idea of giving up control, or the illusion of it, when it does us no good, was perfectly distilled into 2 words that everyone can understand as the “Let Them” theory. Podcast host, author, motivational speaker and former lawyer Mel Robbins explained this theory perfectly in a vial Instagram video.

“I just heard about this thing called the ‘Let Them Theory,’ I freaking love this,” Robbins starts the video.

“If your friends are not inviting you out to brunch this weekend, let them. If the person that you're really attracted to is not interested in a commitment, let them. If your kids do not want to get up and go to that thing with you this week, let them.” Robbins says in the clip. “So much time and energy is wasted on forcing other people to match our expectations.”

“If they’re not showing up how you want them to show up, do not try to force them to change; let them be themselves because they are revealing who they are to you. Just let them – and then you get to choose what you do next,” she continued.

The phrase is a great one to keep in your mental health tool kit because it’s a reminder that, for the most part, we can’t control other people. And if we can, is it worth wasting the emotional energy? Especially when we can allow people to behave as they wish and then we can react to them however we choose.

@melrobbins

Stop wasting energy on trying to get other people to meet YOUR expectations. Instead, try using the “Let Them Theory.” 💥 Listen now on the #melrobbinspodcast!! “The “Let Them Theory”: A Life Changing Mindset Hack That 15 Million People Can’t Stop Talking About” 🔗 in bio #melrobbins #letthemtheory #letgo #lettinggo #podcast #podcastepisode

How you respond to their behavior can significantly impact how they treat you in the future.

It’s also incredibly freeing to relieve yourself of the responsibility of changing people or feeling responsible for their actions. As the old Polish proverb goes, “Not my circus, not my monkeys.”

“Yes! It’s much like a concept propelled by the book ‘The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k.’ Save your energy and set your boundaries accordingly. It’s realizing that we only have “control” over ourselves and it’s so freeing,” 60DaysToLive2012 wrote.

“Let It Be” brought Paul McCartney solace as he dealt with losing his band in a very public breakup. The same state of mind can help all of us, whether it’s dealing with parents living in the past, friends who change and you don’t feel like you know them anymore, or someone who cuts you off in traffic because they’re in a huge rush to go who knows where.

The moment someone gets on your nerves and you feel a jolt of anxiety run up your back, take a big breath and say, “Let them.”


This article originally appeared last year.

Dr. Alicia Jeffrey-Thomas teaches you how to pee.

A pelvic floor doctor from Boston, Massachusetts, has caused a stir by explaining that something we all thought was good for our health can cause real problems. In a video that has more than 5.8 million views on TikTok, Dr. Alicia Jeffrey-Thomas says we shouldn’t go pee “just in case.”

How could this be? The moment we all learned to control our bladders we were also taught to pee before going on a car trip, sitting down to watch a movie, or playing sports.

​The doctor posted the video as a response to TikTok user Sidneyraz, who made a video urging people to go to the bathroom whenever they get the chance.

Sidneyraz is known for posting videos about things he didn’t learn until his 30s. "If you think to yourself, 'I don't have to go,' go," SidneyRaz says in the video. It sounds like common sense but evidently, he was totally wrong, just like the rest of humanity.

@sidneyraz

on vacation and remembering #vacation #tips #bathroom #travel #tipsandtricks #todayilearned #todayyearsold #islandlife #traumabrain #roadtrip #inmy30s

"Here's why you shouldn't go 'just in case.'"

“Pelvic floor physical therapist here, and I work with a lot of people with overactive bladders, stress incontinence, urge incontinence, the whole nine yards,” Dr. Jeffrey-Thomas began her clip. “And here's why you shouldn't go ‘just in case."'

In the video, Dr. Jeffrey-Thomas explains the three levels of feeling the need to pee.

“The first one is just an awareness level that tells you that there's some urine in the bladder,” she said. “The second one is the one that tells you to make a plan to use the toilet, and the third is kind of the panic button that says, ‘Get me there right now, I'm about to overflow.’”

Then she made her case by giving a visual explanation of how going when we don’t need to teaches our bodies to prematurely send signals that it’s time to pee. The simple explanation has a lot of people wondering if their pee sensor is still working correctly.

TikTok can be used to teach science. Yes, even about going to the bathroom.

@thepelvicdancefloor

#stitch with @sidneyraz I know it sounds counterintuitive and goes against everything your momma taught you - just out here trying to save your bladder 🤍

In a rare display of humility on the Internet, Sidneyraz saw the video and thanked the doctor for the correction. "Oh hey, thanks for correcting me!" he wrote.

The video shocked a lot of people who feel like their entire lives have been based on a lie—at least when it comes to something most of us do six to eight times a day. “TikTok is basically just a bunch of videos telling me I'm doing life wrong,” joked one commenter. “Like Jesus, really? I'm peeing wrong?”

Yes, you are.

Finally, some bathroom science you can take with you


"Who else hears their mom in their head say 'go just in case' when you’re out and about and near a bathroom?" another commenter asked.

The good news is that if you’ve always been the type to go “just in case” and you constantly feel like you need to go pee, there is hope. With the help of a doctor, you can retrain your bladder so that you only feel the need to go when it’s time. Now, who’s going to be the first brave person who doesn’t go when they feel the need, just to see if their body’s pee sensor is off? We wish you good luck.


This article originally appeared three years ago.

Unsplash

I've always really liked cliches, idioms, proverbs, and common phrases that we like to use over and over. They can get repetitive at times, but they're crucial tools in communication. They allow us to convey so much meaning in so few words — a commonly understood shorthand that can get complex points across quickly.

The only problem is that many of the most popular idioms in common use date back hundreds of years. In that time, they've either become outdated, or seen their words adopt new meanings. In some cases the idioms have been shortened or reversed, losing important context. So when someone tells you to "bite the bullet," you may inherently know what they mean — but if you really stop and think about it, you have no idea why it means what it means.

If you're a word nerd like me, you'll be absolutely fascinated by the origin and evolution of some of these common idioms, and how they came to mean what they mean today.

1. Sick as a dog / Working like a dog

dog typing on laptopGiphy

Ever have a cold and tell someone you're "sicker than a dog?" Kind of rude to dogs, in my opinion, and a little strange. I've had dogs my whole life and can't remember any of them coming down with the flu.

Sick as a dog actually originates hundreds of years ago, if not longer. Some explanations say that in the 1700s, stray dogs were responsible for the spread of many diseases, along with rats and other gutter critters. There are also references as far back as the Bible to dogs eating their own vomit — sounds pretty sick to me.

What about working like a dog? Dogs are the laziest creatures around! For this one you have to remember that dogs as "pleasure pets" is a relatively recent phenomenon, and before that they had to earn their keep by working tirelessly on the farm to herd and protect the animals.

2. Sweating like a pig

This is an extremely common idiom that we all use and accept. There's just one problem with it. Pigs don't sweat!

So... what gives? You might be surprised to hear that 'sweating like a pig' actually has nothing to do with farm animals.

According to McGill University: "The term is actually derived from the iron smelting process in which hot iron poured on sand cools and solidifies with the pieces resembling a sow and piglets. Hence 'pig iron'. As the iron cools, the surrounding air reaches its dew point, and beads of moisture form on the surface of the 'pigs'. 'Sweating like a pig' indicates that the "pig" (ie iron) has cooled enough to be safely handled. And that's a "pig" you wouldn't want to eat."

3. Bite the bullet

Biting the bullet refers to sucking it up and doing something hard, something you don't want to do but is necessary, and accepting the difficult consequences and/or pain that comes with it. But what does that have to do with biting a bullet?

There are different theories on this. One common explanation is that in the olden days it was common for soldiers on the battlefield receiving surgery to bite down on a lead bullet. You've probably seen people in moving biting down on a piece of wood or leather strap. Since lead is a softer metal, it would give just a little bit between their teeth and not damage them. So the idiom 'biting the bullet' means, okay, this is going to suck, just bite down and get through it.

4. Healthy as a horse

This one has always confused me. As a layman, it seems like horses are prone to injury and have trouble recovering when they hurt themselves. More research shows that horses can not vomit, which means they are highly at risk for deadly colic episodes. Doesn't sound super healthy!

The best explanation I can find for healthy as a horse is that, again, in the olden days, horses were symbols of health and strength and vitality. Which checks out — they're really powerful, majestic creatures.

5. Slept like a baby

To many parents, this common idiom is rage-inducing. If babies sleep so well, why am I so exhausted all the time?!

Yes, babies are notorious for waking up every few hours or at the first sign of hunger or a dirty diaper. It puts their parents through the wringer (another strange idiom!). But to the outside observer, a sleeping baby is pure bliss. They are so innocent and blissfully unaware of anything going on around them — after all, if they're not sitting in a dirty diaper they really don't have too many other things to worry about. Also, despite all their shenanigans, babies do sleep a lot — around 17 hours a day or so. When you put it that way, the idiom starts to make a little sense.

6. Happy as a clam

Clams are a lot of things. Some people find them delicious, others disgusting. One thing I think we can all agree on is that clams don't seem particularly happy, which makes this idiom a bit of a conundrum.

The truth is that this phrase is actually derived from the full version: "Happy as a clam at high water."

At low water, or low tide, clams are exposed to predators. At high tide, they're safe in deeper water. That's about as happy as mollusk can get!

7. The proof is in the pudding

Hey, we all love pudding. But what the heck does this mean? If you're not familiar, it refers to judging something based on the results it generates — but what that has to do with pudding is a bit of a mystery to most people.

This is another example of a shortened idiom that makes more sense when you read the full, original line: "The proof of the pudding is in the eating."

According to Dictionary.com it "originated as a reference to the fact that it was difficult to judge if the pudding was properly cooked until it was actually being eaten. In other words, the test of whether it’s done is taking a bite."

8. Don't look a gift horse in the mouth

smiling horseGiphy

I've always been a big fan of this idiom, which basically means that it's rude to over-analyze or criticize something you got for free, especially when it was a nice gesture from a friend or loved one.

But here we go with horses again! This phrase likely originated from the fact that you can determine a horse's age and health by looking at its teeth. So if someone were to give you a horse as a gift, it would be rude to immediately try to see how "good" it was by looking in its mouth.

9. Clean as a whistle

Whistles are objectively disgusting. They collect spit and germs every time they're used. I certainly wouldn't hold them up as a beacon of cleanliness.

So what gives with this idiom? There are several possible explanations that have been proposed.

First, a whistle won't work, or won't work very well, if it has debris blocking up its inside. So you can think of "clean" in this case as being "empty or free of clutter." Another possibility is that, in this idiom, clean refers to sharpness — as in the sharp sound a whistle makes — and that inference has been lost over time.

10. Pull yourself up by your bootstraps

This phrase is commonly use to describe someone who was "self-made" and built themselves up into a success from nothing. Imagine lying on the floor and hoisting yourself to your feet using only the straps on your boots.

The only problem is... that's impossible! And that's exactly the point. This idiom is actually meant to be sarcastic and to imply that "socioeconomic advancement... was an impossible accomplishment," according to Useless Etymology.

11. Have your cake and eat it too

cartoon cake sliceGiphy

Why bother having a cake if you can't eat it? That's the mystery of this extremely common idiom or proverb (sometimes worded "you can't have your cake and eat it, too")

The explanation is actually really simple. "Have" in this case really means "keep" or "hold onto." So, in that case, it makes perfect sense that you can't eat your cake and also still have it. "You can't have it both ways," would be another way of saying it.

12. Head over heels

Very rarely do people describe being deeply in love without using this phrase. But it's a confusing one, because isn't your head always over your heels? That doesn't seem to be an extraordinary state of being.

The idiom here has actually been flipped over time for unknown reasons. Originally, it went "heels over head", implying upside down. Some say it may also reference certain sexual positions...

13. Pushing the envelope

When I think of radical, risky, or pushing the limits of what's possible, sliding an envelope across a table just somehow doesn't quite capture it for me. But an envelope doesn't have to be just a paper container that you put other paper in. It can actually refer to different parts and practices of an aircraft.

"Push the envelope comes from aeronautics, where it refers to a set of performance limits that may not be safely exceeded," according to Merriam Webster. Now that's more like it!

A powder-saurus caught in the wild.

A father-daughter snowboarding session takes the cuteness up a notch thanks to dad’s brilliant idea to attach a mic to his 4-year-old. Sweetness ensued.

Sporting an adorable dinosaur onesie, the “powder-saurus” glides through their “secret path,” warning dad of intruders. Cause clearly, it’s THEIR secret path.

As she does, she sings her song of resilience and courage.


“I won’t fall … maybe I will … that’s okay … cause we all fall.”

Truly powerful wisdom in such a tiny package.

One person astutely wrote in the comments, “This is the mantra we all need in 2022.” I mean, it's accurate. We can totally use it in 2025, too.

Another added, “this child gave a TED Talk about the power of positive self-talk.”

Indeed, “Shredder Dad” shares footage of our loveable snowboarding dinosaur making a few face plants, but she quickly bounces back. Nothing can stop her from her “weewhoos.” Nothing.

That is, until she becomes a “stuck-asaurus.” A truly relatable moment for all ages. Aren’t "indiscernible verbal struggles" part of the soundtrack of life? Still, she takes it all in hilarious stride, laughing all the way, and the positivity is heartwarming.

This video quickly put a smile on more than 6 million faces, and even got a comment from Walmart, which agreed that “we all fall sometimes.”

Turns out that there’s even more wholesome adventure content on the family’s TikTok. They even have a very thorough guide for teaching a toddler to snowboard here.

Next time you’re feeling down, just think of the powder-saurus song, and you’ll be back to “weewhoo” in no time.


This article originally appeared three years ago.

What do you think this helicopter pancake ACTUALLY looks like?

The things we do for our children. A dad on Reddit was asked by his child to make a helicopter pancake for breakfast and he took a picture of the result. His culinary art piece was… well, it was something. It was so bad that he asked fellow dads to roast his work to get a good laugh. The comments were hilariously brutal:

“How can we roast your helicopter pancake when there isn’t anything helicopter shaped in the photo?”

“Interesting choice to make a helicopter after it's already crashed.”

“Dad, that’s a NSFW pancake you’re serving.”

“Looked like a rabbit breakdancing to me.”

“I see Papa Smurf, but yeah, I could also understand bunny.”

“I mean, I see a bunny with a schlong but yeah, helicopter. 😂”

“I thought it was a guy in a sombrero.”

“Klingon bird of prey.”

“Stick to Mickey Mouse, bud.”

Making pancakes"Why couldn't they have asked for a circle, planet, or wheels?"Photo credit: Canva

While it was a bunch of playful ribbing and the poster knew his attempt at a helicopter pancake was subpar at best, another dad started a different thread praising him and his work.

A comparison between a cartoon helicopter and a pancake shaped like one.Pictured: Dads supporting dadsPhoto credit: Reddit

While putting a comparison photo of a cartoon helicopter next the picture of the wonky pancake, the supportive dad tacked on to the post “Arnold would be proud,” referencing the often imitated and quoted line “GET TO THE CHOPPAH!” from the Arnold Schwarzenegger movie, Predator.

i.imgur.com

Other dads added to the support:

“Nailed it.”

“Kids care that you try, and that you pay attention to them.”

“That’s what matters most. :)”

According to a 2024 study at Penn State University, parents that are able to laugh at themselves and have a good sense of humor alongside their kids tend to have better relationships with them and better bonds. This is because younger kids see that mom and dad make mistakes and can laugh at them, not making it a big deal. This allows kids to cut themselves a little bit of slack when they misfire during an honest attempt at a task. Being of good humor also lets kids feel able to approach their parents when they make a mistake, trusting that their confession won’t be met with outright anger.

A girl and her dad making silly facesIt's actually good to look silly and laugh at yourself in front of your kids.Photo credit: Canva

“Parents need to be able to laugh at themselves to let go and not take life too seriously,” said family therapist Katie Ziskind to ParentMap. “If a parent gets overwhelmed and anxious, their child will also take on this anxiety and [become] overwhelmed. If you can laugh at yourself as a parent, you and your child will be much better off!”

Ziskind went on to say that laughing at your shortcomings, like making a helicopter pancake that actually looks like a melted dough claw hammer, can teach good behavior along with bringing light and laughter to breakfast time.

“Laughter can be a tool to get through tension and stress, so by modeling this behavior, you’re doing your child a world of good. By laughing, you’re teaching your child to stay positive.”

As both sets of dads have shown, it’s good to be able to laugh at your foibles but also just do your best for your kids. It sets a good example for them while also providing a bit of extra fun into day-to-day life. And on the internet, for that matter.