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Friendship

Friendship

"It's you who keep me going": 81-year-old writes heartfelt text to his softball teammates

The younger team had no idea how much it meant to the man to be included in the league, and now we're all sobbing.

Sam Evanz/TikTok

81-year-old writes heartfelt text message to younger softball teammates in middle of the night.

It's not been a particularly great week on the Internet. No, scratch that—month. Actually, come to think of it, the last few years haven't been amazing. There's bad news everywhere we look. Divisiveness. Arguing. Violence.

Maybe that's why this small story of kindness and hope is resonating so deeply with everyone who comes across it. It's a simple story of people being good to one another, and that's what we need right now more than ever.

A mom named Sam Evanz occasionally shares updates about her husband's local softball team on TikTok. Recently, she posted an incredibly heartfelt message the team received from one of their teammates. The teammate just so happens to be an 81-year-old man.

Evanz's husband is on a 15-player casual team in Newfoundland and Labrador, Canada. One of the players is 81-year-old Nelson Bradbury. The oldest on the team by a solid margin, Bradbury recently took the chance to tell the guys just how much he appreciated the opportunity to play with them, even though he may not be the best athlete out there anymore.

"Well guys , just up to do my middle of the night pee. I have been laying in bed for the past half hour thinking about tonight's game and thinking about the great bunch of guys I am allowed to play with," the long text message begins, coming through at approximately 2:30 a.m.

"I really appreciate the way you guys treat me as an equal and not just an old fart. ... It's all of you who keep me going and give me the reason to get out of bed in the morning."

You'll just have to read the whole thing in Evanz's post to fully appreciate Bradbury's gratitude and contagious sense of humor.

TikTok · Sam Evanz | boy mom 🤘🏻 www.tiktok.com


Evanz was stunned when her post went massively viral, racking up nearly 15 million views as of this writing.

"The response has been pretty incredible!" she tells Upworthy, saying multiple international media outlets picked up the story including a sports reporter in Italy.

Commenters on the post were overwhelmed with appreciation for Bradbury. And, in an instant, fiercely protective of him.

"EVERYONE BETTER HAVE TEXTED BACK"

"AND EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM BETTER HAVE TOLD HIM HOW MUCH HE MEANS TO THE TEAM!"

"he’s been thinking this for a while but was scared to say it and i’m so glad he did. now if they didn’t respond we’re riding at dusk cause dawn is too far away."

"It’s just a game to you but for him it’s the reasons he gets up everyday"

The Philadelphia Eagles official TikTok account even chimed in: "Being a teammate is a special thing."

Nelson Bradbury stans will be happy to know that his teammates appreciated the message just as much as the rest of us do. Many of them wrote back the next morning, according to an update posted by Evanz.

"Glad to have ya you old fart!!!" one joked.

"You may not know this but it's your example that keeps a lot of us older... oops... mature players going," another said.

You can see a picture of the whole squad here:

team, community, softball, men, sports, friends TikTok · Sam Evanz | boy mom 🤘🏻 www.tiktok.com


The famous quote from playwright George Bernard Shaw says, "We don't stop playing because we get old. We get old because we stop playing."

Never has the quote been more fitting. Friendship, community, and even play are things all of us humans need. We only need it more as we age. Loneliness reduces our lifespan, while friendship improves not only our longevity but our happiness and quality of life. It may be a simple softball league, but it means a lot to the men who participate, and especially to Bradbury.

Bradbury has a terrific outlook on his life and on how he hopes to spend the rest of his days, of which there are hopefully many. Evanz says that Bradbury is having fun with all the viral attention, and he has even joined TikTok himself so he can keep up with all the mayhem.

"I don't know if I will get another year in the league or not," he writes in the original message. "Shit, I don't buy GREEN bananas any more. But I do know, this will be the year of ball play I will remember."

Friendship

People recall their fleeting relationships from cruises and vacations and it's so wholesome

The friendships and romances we make on vacation often don't last, but we still remember them forever.

Canva Photos

A woman reminisced about a cute boy she met on a cruise in 1996 and sparked people's memories.

I always think about the line from Fight Club, when Edward Norton's character says that he thinks of the people he meets on airplanes as "single serving friends." Though Tyler Durden chastises him for being too clever, I think Norton was onto something.

On a recent Disney cruise with my family, we really hit it off with two other families that had young kids the same age as our youngest daughter. One of them lived in Texas, the other all the way in the UK—both a far cry from Georgia, where we lived. We follow each other passively on social media, but for that one week, we were the best of friends and spent big chunks of every day together. Another time, I met a girl on a Greyhound bus when I was about 19 and going from Tempe, Arizona to Los Angeles to visit a friend. We talked the entire way, into the morning hours as we passed stunning desert rock formations and cacti as far as the eye could see.

People We Meet on Vacation isn't just a great romance novel by Emily Henry. It's a strangely beautiful phenomenon of life. The flings, romances, friendships, or even strange alliances usually don't make it back to the real world. And if they do, it's rarely the same as it was in the bubble of isolation. But that doesn't mean those connections don't leave a mark on us, sometimes forever.

A woman named Kat recently took to Reddit to share an old photo she came across. It was a younger version of herself, standing next to a "really nice" guy she met on a cruise way back in 1996.

cruise, cruise ships, vacation, reddit, missed connections, memories, nostalgia, romance, friendship, love, kids, teens You never know who you'll meet on a weeklong cruise. Giphy

She writes that they hit it off big time when they met aboard the boat after Kat's high school graduation, and that she thought he was cute. Romantic sparks flew, and Kat writes that they "kissed on the last night," but adds that the then 19-year-old boy was a "total gentlemen" for anyone whose mind might be in the gutter.

They exchanged letters for a while but, as people do, eventually lost touch. But she still remembers the time with him fondly. Her post was just a little bit of nostalgia; a way to relive a nice memory.

(The photo and original post were later taken down because, well, you'll see.)

Commenters then began chiming in with their own stories of friends, flings, and loves that they met on vacation and never saw again:

"Back in 2001 I was visiting family in Greece and met the most beautiful girl. The summer was amazing and full of memories. She was truly my first love and I had accidentally lost her contact info and over the years of going back never ran into her again.

Fast forward to 2025 married with children, I took the family to Greece and as I’m walking down the street I see her in front of me with a family of her own. We stopped and chatted for a minute with introductions to our families. As we parted ways and exchanged a quick hug she told me she had thought about me often and what could have been and was happy to see me married with a beautiful family. Memories are to be cherished and sometimes things aren’t meant to be. I was glad to have run into her and see that she was well," one user wrote.

"In my teen years in 2005, went on a carnival cruise to Jamaica, Cayman Islands and perhaps other stops. I met a blonde-haired girl named Joy. I don’t know her last name and we didn’t exchange numbers/other info. We kissed every night on the boat…and what a Joy-ful memory that has always been," added another.

cruise, cruise ships, vacation, reddit, missed connections, memories, nostalgia, romance, friendship, love, kids, teens You can become better friends with a stranger in one week of vacation than people you've known for years. Photo by Alonso Reyes on Unsplash

Even people who were kids at the time remember forming instant, powerful, unforgettable friendships—even if they were short-lived:

"When I was like 8? Maybe 9? I met this girl at some boring adult event and we ran around all night getting into trouble. We instantly became like best friends. And then I never saw her again. I still think about her sometimes," someone wrote.

"When I was about 5 years old, I was in an airport with my family for a few days. I met a girl there about my age and we had a great time playing together in the airport. The girl and her family had to fly out before mine so we had to say our goodbyes. It was really hard on both of us. This was back in the 90s when it was really hard to stay in contact with people. It should've been possible but I guess our parents didn't think a long distance friendship between 5 year olds could work (and they were probably right). ... Her mom took us to a shop in the airport that had those machines where you insert a quarter and get a cheap toy. She got two rings for us. We put them on and she said that it would help us remember each other. We shared a long hug and said our goodbyes at the gate and that was the last time we saw each other," wrote another. "I wore that thin aluminum ring til it fell apart."

"When I was about six years old I flew across the country to visit my grandparents in Arizona," a user chimed in. "I ended up seated next to a teenage boy and talked his damn ears off the whole 5ish hours of the flight- I was a chatty kid- and as an adult I can’t get over how nice and friendly and patient with me he was. Wherever you are in the universe, dude: you were really very kind and I hope you’ve stayed that kind!"

cruise, cruise ships, vacation, reddit, missed connections, memories, nostalgia, romance, friendship, love, kids, teens A shocking number of people remember brief friendships from cruises and airplanes when they were kids. Photo by Hanson Lu on Unsplash

Some people were able to take their vacation romance out into the real world, even if it still didn't last:

"I met a boy on the pool deck of a Carnival Caribbean cruise in 2005. I was newly 21, from the small town cornfields of the midwest... and he was 20, straight out of Brooklyn. We spent 4 days and nights totally inseparable and damn near fell in love. We kept in touch daily and 6 months later we decided to move to South Florida together. We stayed together happily for 5 years, and even had a pet iguana. My first real love. No regrets," one user wrote.

Dozens more stories just like them poured in, and the sign offs were always heart-wrenching:

"if you're out there, I still think about you."

"I have never seen her since. I hope she is doing good!"

"Still wonder about that dude."

"I still think of him"

"I still think about that girl every now and again and it’s been 10 years"

"If you see this, Drew… miss ya bud"

cruise, cruise ships, vacation, reddit, missed connections, memories, nostalgia, romance, friendship, love, kids, teens "I still think about you." Giphy

Emily Goulet writes for Philly Magazine that being away from home has a way of bringing you together with people you might otherwise never connect with, for reasons beyond just that you don't live close to each other.

She recalls making friends at a resort pool once: "Perhaps unsurprisingly, we were also on completely different political sides from our [new] friends, but we all quickly glossed over that. Who wants to debate social issues on vacation? We’ll never see each other again, we figured, so let’s set our differences aside [and] have a few drinks ... We were in a hazy, sun-dappled bubble divorced from reality, an alternate universe where nobody works and men walk around shirtless and people ride Segways."

When we're away from our usual routine, we open ourselves up to new experiences. We try new things, interact with people in different ways, and aren't bogged down by the realities that make real-life friendships and romances so difficult. Vacations friends and flings are perfect in that way, preserved in time when everything was great and nobody had a care in the world. They don't get tainted by anything, and maybe that's why the memories are so wonderful to revisit.

The man from Kat's story, John, eventually showed up after another poster recognized him and clued him into the viral thread.

In fact, the photo had to be taken down because people began unwittingly sharing John's personal information in the thread. Turns out, Redditors are a little too good at tracking people down.

"Thank you for posting this! I don’t have that picture and it totally brought back memories of talking and joking with you. I don’t remember your name either, but I remember your face and smile. ... It’s so nice to know you have had kind thoughts of me and well wishes. I’ve felt the same about you and others I’ve been lucky enough to bull shit and connect with. Too many to name (get it) and it sounds like a lot of people on this thread have been as lucky as us," he wrote. "I had so much fun hanging out with you and it totally made my cruise! It is so cool that our time stirred up memories like ours on this thread, thanks for motivating that."

It wasn't the case of two star-crossed lovers reuniting. John is married with kids, and Kat writes in a reply that is she is widowed. But the two will always have happy memories of the week they spent together. And, clearly, they aren't the only ones with such a story.

Canva

A kid gets teased by classmates. Union Jack and American flags.

According to a meme making the rounds on social media, if you playfully mock your friends, you're "300 percent" more likely to be honest, loyal and have deeper bonds with them. But here's the catch. That number seems to have been pulled from thin air, as no one can find an actual source for that statistic.

What IS true, however, is that some researchers do believe that playful teasing can be a good thing. In his article for Psychology Today, Dr. Peter Gray Ph.D cites psychologist Dacher Keltner who claims teasing is "an intentional provocation accompanied by playful off-record markers that together comment on something relevant to the target."

But what was especially interesting about this false data making the rounds was how differently people responded to it. In particular, Americans and Brits/Aussies seemed to have very different points-of-view, at least on this Instagram thread.


Gray suggests that teasing amongst the people closest to you can take the form of showing someone you accept them despite their flaws. It can also serve as means to humble one another, encourage positive change and even test the boundaries of the relationship. "Teasing can be a sign of affection, a constructive form of criticism, or a cruel put-down. It can also be a semi-competitive verbal game, in which the players are testing one another’s abilities to keep cool in response to provocation and provide clever responses."

teasing, playful, joking, friendships An animated girl teases someone. Giphy

It's also noted how vital it is that the person on the receiving end of the "tease" understands the assignment. If their perception of the "jokes" is negative, or they're feeling sensitive, (particularly if there are third-party witnesses) the teasing slips quickly into bullying. In the study, "The Role of a Bystander in Targets’ Perceptions of Teasing Among Friends: Are You Really Teasing Me?" researchers Ildo Kim and Nicholas A. Palomares note, "Given the provocation goals involved in teasing, being teased in the presence of a third party could be undesirable to a target. The target’s response can differ depending on who the third party is (e.g., another close friend, an acquaintance, a stranger)."


After posting two women citing this stat on the @longevityxlab, the comment section was off to the races.

A handful of people pushed back against the notion, some simply writing, "No." One, (and we can't completely confirm that this person is American) writes, "I really doubt this in most cases. I have a doctorate in clinical psychology that I earned 4 decades ago. Saying hurtful things to one another is just hurtful. I think men pretend to be comfortable with it because it seems 'manly.' There are so many positive things to say to people we love. Maybe these friends are LOYAL to the friends who passively allow them to poke fun at them. I’d like to see the research."

Referring to the naysayers, one writes, "I’m assuming most of the comments are from Americans. In Britain we know this to be true. You only rip the piss out of your closest friends."

This commenter concurs. "Indeed I’m a Brit who lives in Australia. If I’m nice to you we have a problem."

This one gets more specific. "If mates don’t call you a K--b-head or a B-----d at least once when you are in their company, are they even friends?"

Of course, it's not just Brits and Aussies. People from all over the world including those from France, Brazil and Ireland commented that they essentially see playful teasing as their love language, as well. Obviously not ALL, and plenty of Americans take part in ribbing one another.

Ricky Gervais discusses American vs. British humor. www.youtube.com

But what can be confirmed is that many Brits truly enjoy the "insult" play. It's just a thing they often do. In the op-ed "The Difference Between American and British Humour" for Time Magazine, comedian Ricky Gervais writes of his fellow Brits, "We tease our friends. We use sarcasm as a shield and a weapon. We avoid sincerity until it’s absolutely necessary. We mercilessly take the piss out of people we like or dislike basically. And ourselves. This is very important. Our brashness and swagger is laden with equal portions of self-deprecation. This is our license to hand it out."

He further assures Americans, "This can sometimes be perceived as nasty if the recipients aren’t used to it. It isn’t. It’s play fighting. It’s almost a sign of affection if we like you, and ego bursting if we don’t. You just have to know which one it is."

The world could use more Blakes.

We teach our kids how to make good choices, treat others with kindness, and (hopefully) be the type of humans who make the world a better place. But often, it's the kiddos who have a thing or two to teach us about this. After all, the science suggests that kids are actually hardwired to be prosocial and altruistic.

Take this heartwarming story for example. When 6-year-old Blake Rajahn showed up to his first grade classroom back in 2019, he arrived bearing an uplifting a message for his fellow students.

Blake's mother, Nikki Rajahn, who runs a custom personalization business in Fayette County, Georgia, asked her son what kind of t-shirt he wanted for his first day of school. He could have chosen anything—his favorite sports star's number, a cool dragon, a witty saying—anything he wanted, she could make. Blake chose something unexpected—an orange t-shirt with a simple, sweet message for the other kids at his school to see. Five little words that might just mean the world to someone who reads them.

"I will be your friend."

Ouch. My heart.

Rajahn shared the story on her business Facebook page:

"I have to brag on my son. I told him that as a back to school gift, I will make him any shirt he would like. It could have anything—a basketball theme, football, etc. which are all his favorites. He thought a while and said, 'will you please make me a shirt that says "I will be your friend" for all the kids who need a friend to know that I am here for them?' Never underestimate your kid's heart for others! I love my sweet Blake! #stopbullying"

Apparently, such a gesture is typical of Blake. "He has always had a heart for others and is very genuine," his mother told Upworthy. She said she's donating part of the proceeds of her t-shirt sales to the Real Life Center, a non-profit that helps families in need in Tyrone, Georgia, all because of Blake.

"During the summer we had a vacation Bible school that he went to," she said, "and they did a toothbrush and toothpaste drive for the Real Life Center. He came home saying we needed to go to the Dollar Store to get some that night. We told him we would go the next day, but he had to use his money for it. He said that was fine, so we asked how much he would like to spend. He said, 'It's for people who don't have any, right?' We said yes, so he very matter-of-fact said, 'Well all of it!' And he did!"

Rajahn said everyone has been very encouraging and people are starting to order their own version of the t-shirt with "#blakesfriends" added to it.

She also shared Blake's reaction to hearing that his shirt idea was starting to spread on Facebook—and again, it's just the sweetest darn thing.

"Ever since I posted about my son and his shirt, I have sold some and told Blake about it. He said, "Oh good! Now more and more people are going to have more and more friends!" He is just so flattered so many want to be his twin too 😊"

Sometimes all a person needs is one friend so they won't feel alone, and Blake going out of his way to make sure kids feel welcomed by him is an example even adults can learn from. If we all reached out to people who might be shy or who might feel excluded, and let them know in some small way that we are open to being friends, what a better world we could build.

Thank you, Blake, for bringing some much-needed sunshine into our day.

And while we can all hope that there will be kids as accommodating as Blake, here are a few ways parents can also help their own kids invite in friendships.

kids, parenting, kids t shirts, t shirt printing, sweet kids, anti bullying, custom t shirt Two friends huggingPhoto credit: Canva

Practice conversation starters

Introduce them to simple phrases like “I like your XYZ” or “Can I play with you?” Practice unexpected “what-if” scenarios, especially hw to respond when another kid isn't as receptive.

Normalize the challenges of making friends

Remind them that even if they do have a hard time making friends, that there is nothinig wrong with them. Somethings just take time and practice.

Explain the different types of friendship

Kids needs to understand that there are different circles of friendship, each that have varying levels of frequency, commitment, trust, etc. A friend that you only see at soccer games might be a little different than a bestie.

Help kids define friendship on their own terms

Talk with your kid about what they actually want in a friendship. What sort of activities do they want to share, and why?

Help identify potential friends

Ask questions to help them figure out what they might have in common with this potential friend, and what makes them friendship material

Explain that even the best friendship don't always last forever

Whether the friendship turns sour, or it begins to split paths, it's okay for that relationship to end.

This article originally appeared six years ago.