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A scammer on the computer. A senior citizen falls for it.

Scam artists have gotten more advanced when it comes to diabolically tricking people out of their money, especially senior citizens. And now with cryptocurrency, which is confusing to many and completely accessible online, there's an added layer of concern for the most vulnerable.

Which is why, more than ever, people need to be on the lookout for swindlers. Luckily, some really good folks are stepping up. On the subreddit r/scams, there are 1.6 million weekly visitors; time and time again, they help alert people to perpetual fraud.

One bank teller posted, "You all saved my customer today" and then told a heroic story about an elderly customer attempting to deposit a check.

"I had a customer come in today and he had a cheque that he wanted to deposit," the bank teller wrote. "Super normal, no red flags. He asked about how long the hold will be. Still, no red flags. Since we're in Canada and we celebrate Victoria Day, the banks are closed on Monday. So, his 5 business day hold will take us to May 21."

banks, bank teller, elderly, senior citizens, scams A bank teller dispenses money at a bank. www.flickr.com

Here's where things took a turn. "I told him that and he said he needs at least $9000 released right away," the bank teller added. "Now I'm even more curious and I asked why. He said he needs 10% to send to his crypto account so he can withdraw the $90,000 USD that his crypto account has generated."

Luckily, this bank teller's antenna went up. "Skeptical, I asked what account, how he opened it, the website—the whole ordeal," the bank teller wrote. "To my surprise, he told me. He clicked on a FACEBOOK AD and deposited a couple of $100 back a few months ago and now it's generated to $90,000 USD. But in order to get the $90,000—he needs to deposit $9,000."

"Yeah, no. I told him he's being scammed, grabbed my phone, and showed him the numerous crypto scams posted on reddit," the bank teller added. "I said his biggest blessing is losing a couple of $100 and not thousands."

There are over one hundred comments on this thread alone. One pointed out: "We all have a blind spot. In reality, most of us over fifty are hesitant to listen to our family members and neighbors. Stubborn. We think we are so smart, and gotta maintain that street cred. It took a nurse I had never met to get my attention about a health issue. It may take a bank employee to open my eyes about something like this. Thank you for diving into his problem."

This person noted how refreshing it was to see that the customer, who had truly gotten their hopes up, actually listened to the teller: "The biggest surprise here is that he actually listened and was willing to believe he'd been scammed. We see so many horror stories about people sticking their heads in the sand and refusing to accept reality, it's such a nice change of pace."

There are so many other stories that run the gamut of scams across every platform. One person told a harrowing story of their mother who got defrauded out of her entire retirement fund. The thread has over 500 comments of suggestions, as well as communal support.

@droidsavvy

Some have no idea about these 🫡

The good news is there are ways to combat these fraudsters. First, it's important to know what to look for.

The National Council on Aging (NCOA) recently posted the top five scams targeting seniors. These include "The Grandparent Scam," in which someone impersonates a grandchild asking for help, scams that appear to be loans from reputable banks, "tech support scams" (which I have personally fallen for), government scams asking for private information like Social Security numbers, and one of the most upsetting—the romance scam.

"As more people turn to online dating, con artists are seizing the opportunity," NCOA's Jessica Johnson wrote. "Romance scammers create fake social media profiles and use them to gain trust and steal money. In some cases, these scammers may be (or pretend to be) overseas. They may ask their victims to pay for visas, medical emergencies, and travel expenses to come to the U.S."

Johnson adds that as of two years ago, these scams have totaled well over one billion dollars in loss.

-Dr. Regina Koepp gives tips on scammers. www.youtube.com, Dr. Regina Koepp

As for what you can do? First, know—and let those in your life know—that if you get scammed, don't be embarrassed. Have consistent conversations about how clever these scammers have become and how common they are. Advise anyone who might be vulnerable to never give out important information to someone emailing or calling for it.

If it happens, contact local police, banks, and the Federal Trade Commission. Adult Protective Services also has resources on how to get started.

The FTC also posted these helpful tips:

  1. "Never transfer or send money to anyone, no matter who they say they are, in response to an unexpected call or message. Even if they say it’s to 'protect it.'"
  2. "Hang up and verify. Hang up the phone and call the company or agency directly using a phone number or website you know is real. Don’t trust what an unexpected caller says, and never use the phone number in a computer security pop-up or an unexpected text or email."
  3. "Block unwanted calls. Learn about your call blocking options to stop many of these scammers before they reach you."

The topic gained extra attention last year with the film Thelma, in which actress June Squibb plays a woman on a mission to recover her scammed money (her methods are not recommended, but the film, based loosely on a true story, is aces).

June Squibb stars in the movie Thlema. www.youtube.com, Magnolia Pictures

via Twins Trust / Twitter

Twins born from different dads.

Twins born with separate fathers are rare in the human population. Although there isn't much known about heteropaternal superfecundation—as it's known in the scientific community—a study published in The Guardian says that about one in every 400 sets of fraternal twins has different fathers.

This can happen the "natural" way if a woman releases two eggs during her menstrual cycle and then has intercourse with two different men within a short span of time. This could result in both eggs being fertilized by a different man. Both fertilizations would have to occur within 12 to 24 hours. But in this story, it happened due to a bit of modern science.

Simon and Graeme Berney-Edwards, a gay married couple, from London, England both wanted to be the biological father of their first child. "We couldn't decide on who would be the biological father," Simon told The Daily Mail. "Graeme said it should be me, but I said that he had just as much right as I did."

The only way to make it happen would be to have twins through in vitro fertilization. But they would have to find a doctor who would implant embryos from separate fathers in the same surrogate. They knew it wouldn't happen in England, so they looked for a doctor and surrogate mother in a different country.

"I saw Simon and Graeme's profile on a surrogacy website and I thought they had lovely smiles," Meg Stone, the Canadian soon-to-be surrogate, said. "I had recently split with my partner, and I wasn't ready for another baby, so I wanted to help someone."

Simon Berney-Edwards, Graeme Berney-Edwards, Meg Stone, surrogate parents, same-sex parents The coule and their surrogate.via Meg Seroski-Stone / Facebook


Meg was already a mother of two children, Jeffrey, 12, and Max, five. The couple flew out to Los Angeles, where they both fertilized eggs from an anonymous donor. Then, they journeyed to Canada, where they met with Meg to be sure she was the perfect fit. "We were nervous at the beginning—in case that we didn't click with her. But we needn't have worried," Simon said.

Six months later, one fertilized embryo of Simon's and one embryo of Graeme's were inserted into Meg's womb. The couple spent a stressful week hoping both embryos would take. They were afraid that one of the fathers' embryos would work, the other wouldn't, and they'd have to eventually go through the same process again.

"She FaceTimed us from the scanning room. First of all, we saw one heartbeat, and our stomachs clenched with nerves," Simon said. "Then we saw the other heartbeat. Graeme and I just hugged each other," he continued. "We were just over the moon. We were both going to be dads—she was pregnant with both of our babies."

The couple kept in close touch with Meg over the coming weeks and flew back to Canada for her 19-week scan. The two proud fathers-to-be were delighted to touch her belly and feel their babies kicking inside the womb. At 31 weeks, Meg was in pain and thought she was about to go into labor. So the two men quickly packed their bags and flew to Canada.

"We dashed to the hospital when we arrived, to find out it was a false alarm," Simon said. "We were just so relieved that she and the babies were fine." The couple remained in Canada, and five weeks later, Meg gave birth to Calder and Alexandra Berney Edwards.

"It was the most amazing experience of our lives," Simon said. "Alexandra was born first and then Calder arrived minutes later. "When we both held them for the first time, we couldn't believe that we were both daddies," he added. "It was a long way to go and do this, but it was worth it to both be able to have fathered one of the twins each."

"Calder was the double of Graeme, and Alexandra was the image of me," Simon said. The couple remained in Canada for seven more weeks before they could take their newborns home. Then, they hopped on a plane and returned to England. But sadly, they had to leave a new member of their family behind.

"It was sad to say goodbye to Meg, When we brought them home for the first time, it was just incredible," Simon said. "Since then, they have gone from strength to strength. They are doing so well and hitting all their milestones." The twins recently celebrated their first birthday, and the fathers flew Meg out to celebrate with them. "Simon and Graeme are like brothers to me now," Meg said. "They call me the twins 'Tummy Mummy' which I love."


Simon Berney-Edwards, Graeme Berney-Edwards, Meg Stone, surrogate parents, same-sex parents Simon, Greame and their babies.via LGBT News World


This story originally appeared five years ago.

Paul Scanlon shares his thoughts.

Racist jokes are one of the more frustrating manifestations of racism. Jokes in general are meant to be a shared experience, a connection over a mutual sense of humor, a rush of feel-good chemicals that bond us to those around us through laughter.

So when you mix jokes with racism, the result is that racism becomes something light and fun, as opposed to the horrendous bane that it really is.

The harm done with racist humor isn't just the emotional hurt they can cause. When a group of white people shares jokes at the expense of a marginalized or oppressed racial group, the power of white supremacy is actually reinforced—not only because of the "punching down" nature of such humor, but because of the group dynamics that work in favor of maintaining the status quo.

British author and motivational speaker Paul Scanlon shared a story about interrupting a racist joke at a table of white people at an event in the U.S, and the lessons he drew from it illustrate this idea beautifully. Watch:

Speaking up in a group setting where people have an unspoken sense of solidarity is difficult. Giving up social capital and being seen as a breaking a code of sorts is uncomfortable. But that difficulty and discomfort are not excuses for staying quiet. As Scanlon points out, our silence is not benign, it's malignant. Keeping quiet while a racist joke is being told and laughed at is harmful because it allows racism to go unchecked and white supremacy to remain secure.

racism, white supremacy, white solidarity, racial justice, anti-racism Anti-racist protest signs.Canva Photos.

An important point Scanlon makes is that not only do white folks allow harm to take place when we remain silent in the face of a friend, family member, colleague, or acquaintance making a racist joke, but we are actually rewarded for saying nothing. We maintain a sense of solidarity, we gain social capital, we're seen as agreeable and establish a sense of belonging. Those rewards are an insidious form of racism that many white people aren't even aware we participate in.

We have to decide ahead of time that we're going to give up that reward and embrace the inevitable awkwardness in order to do the right thing.

In a useful video based on her book Difference Matters: Communicating Social Identity, Professor Emerita of Communications and Vice Chancellor for Diversity and Inclusion at the University of Colorado Denver, Brenda J. Allen, PhD, breaks down how each of us can use our privilege—whether that's white privilege, gender privilege, financial privilege, education privilege, etc.—for the good of others. Watch:

- YouTube www.youtube.com

We have to decide that ending racism is more important than embarrassment. The more people who stand firm in that decision, the less awkward it will become and the sooner we can redefine what social capital and solidarity really mean.

This article originally appeared on 6.30.20. It has been updated.

Heidi staring back at her harasser on TikTok.

When lifting weights at the gym, the discomfort you feel should be coming from the workout. Not from other people with no concept of boundaries. However, this is an all-too-common occurrence for women. Personal trainer Heidi Aragon (@fit_with_heidi) is used to sharing her fitness journey on social media. Her video, which has now garnered more than 8 million views on TikTok, didn't go viral because of the workout. Instead, people are responding to how she confronted a man who not only wouldn't stop staring at her, but denied the fact that he was. Until Heidi beat him at his own game.

Heidi explains in the text video, "This creepy old guy at the gym kept coming over and staring at me." Sure enough, the video shows a man in a green shirt, eyes undeniably fixated on Heidi. Uncomfortable, Heidi tries to get her husband to stand between her and the man, hoping to send a not-so-subtle cue to back off. But subtlety is clearly not this guy's language.

So what does Heidi do? She stares back. The strategy seemed to work, at least for a while, but eventually Heidi had to go over and confront the guy directly.

Her video text read: "I told him if he's going to work out in this corner, he needed to stop staring and making me uncomfortable. His response was, 'I'm just looking around.' I then told him I record my workouts and I have him on film. He shut up real quick."

@fit_with_heidi

Don’t sit there and tell me you’re not doing something when I have proof. 😡 #gymtok #fittok #influencer #viral #trending #tiktok #fitness #gym #gymgirl #fyp #fypシ #foryou #foryoupage #gymcreeps

I know what you're thinking: "Wait, didn't we just hear a story about this?" Why yes, you're right. Our very own Tod Perry covered another woman who had to deal with a guy at the gym who couldn't take a hint.

Yes, almost back-to-back stories of women who have had enough of fellow male gym-goers. And still, there is victim-blaming. In the video's comment section, one user wrote, "Wear pants like that and expected something different??" "Man let the old man enjoy the view!!! But it’s ok for all of us on tiktok to stare?" another added.

How many videos have to go viral before we stop blaming a woman's choice of clothing (which were really quite normal gym attire, by the way) for a man's obviously intrusive behavior?

@fit_with_heidi

Get after it today #gymtok #fittok #gym #fitness #tiktok #follow #fyp #foryourpage #viral #influencer #trending #fitgirl #workout #personaltrainer

Others also seemed to assess that because Heidi was a fitness influencer, she more or less signed up for this kind of attention, invited or not. This completely negates this woman having any choice in the matter. However, a lot of people did support Heidi in the comments. "This happens too often to women from old guys. Happens to my girl all the time. Sorry y'all gotta deal with this but Proud of you for addressing him," one man wrote. "All the men saying it’s your fault. That attitude is the problem."


After the video went viral, Heidi did post a tongue-in-cheek follow-up video thanking those who posted negative comments, as it gave her more followers and likes. So I guess there's some small victory.

Though we may never have a consensus on proper gym etiquette, a good rule of thumb is keep to yourself. Getting the gumption to go work out is hard enough; don't make staying there a hardship as well.

This article originally appeared four years ago.