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Mental Health

3 signs you might need to take a mental health day and how to talk to your employer about it

Mental health days can be very good for business.

mental health; mental health day; work mental health day; self care; mental health awareness

3 signs you might need to take a mental health day from work

People are starting to take their mental health more seriously and utilizing mental health day. Some companies have even started offering mental health days for their employees on top of their regular sick and vacation days to ensure their employees needs are met. But how do you know it may be time to take a mental health day before you're burned out completely?

One of the coolest things about our bodies is that it gives us cues on what it needs. We're used to the loud physical cues like a grumbling tummy that lets you know it's time to eat or excessive yawning and dry eyes that tell you its time to sleep. But there are other cues that we have either overlooked or haven't quite learned to recognize what our body is trying to tell us and those have to do with needing a mental health break.


When we think of our mental health, we don't often think about the physical symptoms that can be a precursor to emotional symptoms. It's the emotional symptoms that generally get our attention that say something may be bothering us, but our bodies give us clues. Maybe we should listen a bit more closely.

1. You're always tired.

It doesn't seem to matter how much sleep you got the night before, as soon as you get to work, you're exhausted. All you can think about is going home and crawling back in bed. But when your shift is over, suddenly your energy rebounds and you feel like you can do everything you want to do.

2. Frequent headaches

It's normal to get a headache every once in a while but for some reason you seem to only get them when you're either at work, thinking about work or are getting ready to go to work. Could it be that work is giving you the headache? Possibly. Instead of stocking up on Aleve, you might just need a staycation for a couple of days to reset.

3. Muscle pain

For some reason your shoulders, neck and jaw muscles are always tight and you can't figure out why. You try working the knots out yourself and even trade shoulder massages with your officemate but it keeps coming back. It could be tension that you're carrying from work. Our shoulders, necks and jaws are places that tend to hold a lot of our tension so if you're noticing constant muscle tightness in those areas while at work, it's probably time to check in with yourself.

Of course, many of us ignore these physical symptoms of stress and push through, which can cause us to be more curt, snippy, easily irritated and flustered. Once you surpass the obvious symptoms that often feel like undue irritation, we can then slide into crying on breaks, heightened anxiety, feelings of depression, and more. Unfortunately, many people wait until they reach the more disruptive stages before recognizing they need to take a mental health break.

Now that you know the symptoms, how do you ask for a break? If you're not working for yourself, chances are you're reporting to a boss of some sort and will need to disclose you'd like to take a mental health break. If don't work for a company that offers them, you can send an email or ask for a meeting.

You could say something along the lines of, "I'm really invested in the success of the company and my role within in it. In order for me to continue being successful and showing up at my best, I'd like to take two days off next week to focus on my mental health and recharging my battery."

Depending on your company policy, you may need to give more notice. If it's an emergent mental health situation it's always best practice to be candid about your needs without disclosing an excessive amount of unneeded information.

This article was written by Jacalyn Wetzel, Licensed Clinical Social Worker and practicing therapist.

Veronica Duque wearing her famous anatomy suit

Being an educator in the American public school system is one of the hardest jobs in our nation. Not only is the work itself challenging, but with constant battles for educational funding and a student body increasingly tethered to their electronic devices, most teachers in America and around the world are navigating uncharted territory when it comes to finding ways to keep their students engaged in their studies.

And that's why when Verónica Duque came across a form-fitting, anatomical bodysuit while doing some online shopping, she thought it would be perfect visual aid to convey vital information (pun intended) to her students in Spain, in a way they'd actually remember.

Turns out, the entire internet would remember it too.

Duque's husband tweeted a collage of images from the classroom lesson, which quickly went viral, with nearly 70,000 likes. Loosely translated, the tweet from her husband Michael reads: "Very proud of this volcano of ideas that I am lucky to have as a wife. Today she explained the human body to her students in a very original way. Great Veronica !!!"

In an interview with Bored Panda, Duque explained the thought process that led her to presenting her third-grade-class with a unique approach to learning.

"I was surfing the internet when an ad of an AliExpress swimsuit popped up," she said. "Knowing how hard it is for kids this young to visualize the disposition of internal organs, I thought it was worth giving it a try."

anatomy, anatomical suit, teachers, science, cool teachers, science class, amazonThis is a teacher who cares. assets.rebelmouse.io

Online retailers like Amazon have a number of similar anatomical bodysuits for sale. While most people apparently purchase them for Halloween costumes or as gag gifts, it's now likely that Duque's viral moment will inspire some other educators around the world to take a similar approach to teaching the body basics to their students.

anatomy, anatomical suit, teachers, science, cool teachers, science class, amazonHalloween costume, check. Amazon

While some on Twitter were critical of the suit, the vast majority have praised Duque for her innovative approach to teaching. And the anatomical bodysuit is reportedly far from her first creative endeavor in the classroom.

"I decided long ago to use disguises for history lessons," she told Bored Panda. "I'm also using cardboard crowns for my students to learn grammatical categories such as nouns, adjectives, and verbs. Different grammar kingdoms, so to say."

And when it comes to the inevitable, made-up controversy that tends to latch itself onto virtually anyone that goes viral, Duque said she says there's another far more controversial stereotype she hopes her brief moment of fame will help address.

"I'd like society to stop considering teachers to be lazy bureaucratic public servants," she said. "We're certainly not." Get this teacher a raise!

What really works about Duque's presentation is that it engages students in a sensorial experiences, which helps lessons stick (and let's face it, anything that engages he sense nowadays is a godsend). But there are other methods teachers/parents can try that don't involve wearing a suit with guts on 'em.

Here are some suggestions for hands-on "DIY experiments", courtesy of the Little Medical School website:

1. Building the respiratory system by creating a model lung with straws, balloons, bottles, and duct tape

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

2. Sculpting Body parts with Play Doh

(Grab free printable mats on 123Homeschool4Me)

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

3. Build a functioning heart model

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Of course, these lessons are a little more geared towards younger students, but at the same time, it could provide some inspiration for how to get students more involved in their own learning, just like Duque did.

This article originally appeared six years ago.

Photo by Samet Kurtkus on Unsplash

A hoarder's home.

Sometimes, it simply starts with one pile. Some receipts, pay stubs, and bills. Then another pile forms—a shirt you meant to hang up, some workout gear. The piles begin to multiply, and before you know it, they've erupted like tiny volcanoes spewing lava (and junk) around your home. If you don’t even know where to begin in terms of clean-up, you're not alone.

cleaning, clutter, piles, hoarding, hoarderCleaning Hoarding GIF by 60 Second DocsGiphy

Mai Zimmy, on the TikTok page Mom Life & Cleaning, knows this feeling all too well. With over 400,000 followers and 9.1 million likes, she's living proof that an inability to organize is more common than one might think. In one post, she confesses that she was once a hoarder while showing screenshots of her cluttered house in 2020. Her voiceover exclaims, "I was literally drowning in clutter" as the camera pans over a junk-filled bathtub she dubs the "trash tub."

Now, just a few years later, she has helpful tips on how to remedy the situation. She mentions, right off the bat, that she learned the fundamental methods from "Queen" Marie Kondo. Questions like "Does it spark joy? Have you used/worked with it in the last year? Remove duplicates" and more, made famous by Kondo, help her begin. This leads to the truthful realization, "You can't clean clutter."

The first step, she says, is to "Learn to let go." Per Kondo, she shows how to put things into categories and work through them one step at a time.

@maizimmy

Ok. Maybe I was 1% of the problem 😆😅 people ask me all the time how I got my house in order when it was SO FAR GONE. The decluttering and cleaning schedule was HUGE. But even more than that was how my life has changed and just gotten easier over time. The babies aren’t helpless babies forever. It gets easier there for sure one they are in grade school. Plus, the obvious elephant in the room 😅 being a divorced mom in MY situation is about 100 times easier than what I was going through as a “married single mom”. I by no means want to promote divorce, but I do want to promote healthy marriages. No marriage counselor would have ever said my marriage was healthy and that is abundantly clear with how stress free life feels after leaving. #momlife #motherhood #cleantok #cleaningmotivation #cleanwithme #declutter @Procter & Gamble @Clorox

Step two is to "Implement a cleaning schedule." The idea is for that decluttering becomes an actual habit, etched into your mind. She urges people to "find cleaning schedules that work for you." She writes over a cleaning video, "I personally aim to do a nightly reset of the kitchen and living room before bed because these are the most-used parts of my home." She adds, "Then I have my weekly 1.5-hour reset and the occasional 'panic clean' before people come over lol."

Zimmy tells us that the third step is the most important to remember: "Give yourself some grace." She confesses, "When my home was at its worst, I was a 'married single mom' of three kids, two and under." She further relays that she had a full-time job, only to come home "to the second shift of taking care of everything for everyone." She then, adorably, throws some clothes into drawers, writing she still believes in the #NoFoldMethod.

She stresses the idea that "sometimes we're just in the thick of it. Things won't be so crazy forever, and to make the effort to do what you can in the free moments you have." She jokes, "As kids grow and life sorts itself out, you'll realize you were never the problem. Everyone else was." (She then notes in her TikTok description, "Okay, maybe I was ONE percent of the problem.")

Many in the comments seemed to really connect to her use of the phrase "married single mom." Zimmy also writes, "I by no means want to promote divorce, but I do want to promote healthy marriages. No marriage counselor would have ever said my marriage was healthy, and that is abundantly clear with how stress-free life feels after leaving."

In Zimmy's vulnerability, she gets to the root of what was or wasn’t working for her without vilifying anyone. Decluttering is so much more than tidying up, and many therapists explain what it can do to lift depression and anxiety. In her piece "The Many Mental Benefits of Decluttering" for Psychology Today, Diane Roberts Stoler, Ed.D. writes, "Excessive clutter often leads to feelings of shame, hopelessness, and guilt. The feelings can spiral, making it difficult to find the motivation to address the clutter. If someone is already suffering from depression, a cluttered home can worsen that depression. It is often a cycle. The more depressed you get, the harder it is to clean and organize."

Big and small changes, with a game plan and grace for yourself, can help break the shame spiral and get your living space actually "livable" again.

Learning to make sounds we didn't grow up with can be tricky.

When (or if) kids learn phonics at school, they're taught the symbols that go with sounds of their country's native language or languages. People all around the world grow up learning to make specific sounds with their mouths by imitating the language(s) they are immersed in, which can leave us completely unaware of how many other sounds there are until we hear a language that's far different from our own.

Even the common foreign languages that American school kids learn have sounds that can be tricky to get down. The rolled "r" in Spanish. The nuances of French vowel pronunciations. The glottal stops in German. The sound that's a mix between "r" and "l" in Japanese. And for people learning English, one of the trickiest sounds to get down is "er," as in the American pronunciation of "bird," "world," "summer," or "percent."

Oddly enough, for as common as the "er" sound is in English, it's linguistically rare. According to the Linguistics Channel @human1011, the "er" sound is found in less than 1% of the world's languages, rarer than the click consonants found in some languages in East and Southern Africa.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

As rare as the sound is, there are a lot of people in the world who use it, mainly because it's also used in Mandarin Chinese, or at least many variations of it. So, while there aren't many languages that use it, by sheer numbers of people, it's not that uncommon.

"So, a sound that's so rare that it's in less than 1% of the world's languages just happens to exist in the two most spoken languages on Earth? Can that really be a coincidence?" the @human1011 video asks. Well, yes. English and Chinese don't share a common linguistic root, so those sounds just happened to evolve in very different parts of the planet. According to some people in the comments of the video, there are regional dialects in Brazil where the "er" sound is used and in certain parts of the Netherlands as well.

Pronouncing the "er" sound is hard if you don't grow up with it, largely because it's all about the placement and shape of the tongue inside the mouth combined with the way the lips are positioned. That combination is physically tricky to show someone. This video, from a non-native-English-speaker does a good job of explaining the mouth movements that create the sound.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

What's particularly interesting about the "er" sound in American English is that it functions as a vowel sound. Most of us learned that the vowels in English are a, e, i, o, u, and sometimes y, and that's true as far as written vowels go, but vowel sounds are different. In the word "bird," the letter "i" is a vowel, but doesn't make any of the "i" sounds that we learned in school. Instead, the "ir" combine to make the "er" vowel sound. It's called an r-controlled vowel, and we see it in tons of words like "work," "were," "burn," "skirt," etc.

Learn something new every day, right?

Here's another video that explains the physical aspects of articulating the r-controlled vowel sound.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Most of us don't think about the fact that sounds we pronounce without even thinking about it have to be specifically learned and practiced by people who didn't grow up with them. It's not until we start trying to learn a language that's different from our own that we see how many sounds we have to work hard to make, sometimes even having to train our mouth muscles in ways they've never been used before.

It's also a good reminder to be patient and kind with people who are learning a language. It's not easy, and anyone making an effort to communicate in someone else's language deserves our grace and kudos.

You can follow @human1011 on YouTube for more interesting linguistics trivia.

Man walking his dog saves boy who fell into the Seneca River

The thing about community is you don't have to know the people in your community to look out for them. Thankfully this is something that has resulted in neighbors helping neighbors in mundane and extraordinary situations. One little boy in New York is still alive thanks to one of his community members looking out for him when he found himself in pretty serious trouble.

Ed Rohmer, 61 was out walking his dog near the Seneca River in Baldwinsville, NY when he spotted seven-year-old Makai Bays walking with his bike across Lock 24. Where the boy was walking sits atop a water filled area that is opened and closed to raise or lower boats in the canal like an elevator. Makai stopped pushing his bike and, instead, climbed onto the large locking area where he sat dangling his feet. This prompted Rohmer to call out to the boy, hoping to stop him from making a grave mistake.

But just after Rohmer yells to the boy to be careful, Makai slipped off the lock and plunged into the frigid water below. The man attempted to cross the lock to get to the boy, but Rohmer tells syracuse.com that his dog Maggie refused to go over the grates. It didn't stop him from going after the child desperately trying not to drown in the cold river. Rohmer spotted an older kid on a skateboard and handed his dog over to them, then he rushed to try and get Makai out of the river.

All of this is happening while Makai's mom, Taylor Provost was at work. The mom of four left her 18- year-old daughter to babysit her younger siblings while Provost worked an evening shift. Makai was out with two other little boys playing when the kids got separated after deciding to go to the park. It was then that Makai, who had recently moved to that part of town, ended up next to the river where he fell in.

Thankfully, Rohmer happened to be nearby. After he witnessed the boy fall into the river, he rushed to save him—and then called 911. When the man made it to the edge of the lock he could see Makai hanging onto a log. It turns out the little boy didn't know how to swim, so the log was the only thing keeping him afloat. However, with the water so cold, it would only be a matter of time before he could no longer hold on.

Rohmer told syracuse.com that he yelled down to the scared boy, “I’m here. I'm going to help you."

The good Samaritan held the boy's bike over the lock and instructed him to grab onto the wheel so he, Rohmer, could use it to pull him up. Unfortunately, Makai's hands were so numb at this point that it was too painful for the boy to hold on. After a couple of failed attempts to grab his bike's wheel, the little boy slipped under the water. In an instant he was gone; one of his shoes floated to the top of the water where his head had just been.

In a Facebook post, Rohmer wrote, "He grabs it but says he can’t hold on, it hurts his hands. I get him about halfway out of the water and his hands slip off due to him being weighed down by the water and cold and scared. I try this two more times and his head goes under water as [he] falls back in on the second and third try. At this point I’m thinking I’m going to have to jump in if he doesn’t come back up. But i have no idea how I’m going to get him or myself back up."

Just when he was about to hop into the water with no idea how to get out, police and volunteer fire fighters show up. They all work together to figure out how to get the boy out after the bike and life ring didn't work. Eventually, one of the firemen put on special gear while Rohmer held onto his ankles, and lowered him down while another fireman helped from another angle to get the boy out of the freezing water.

After several hours in the hospital and likely lots of hugs from his mom, Makai is back home without injury. Just days after his near death experience in the Seneca River, Makai got to meet his real life hero with his mom and sister by his side.

Joy

Woman shares the one heartwarming request she got while visiting a nursing home

A beautiful story reminding us that some things never change.

@brittanydspivey/TikTok

We need more stories like this.

When vocal coach Brittany Spivey’s mother passed away in 2022, she began sharing her grief journey—and all the discoveries and transformation it brought—online. Including one particularly lovely story involving her visits to a nursing home.

As Spivey explains in the video below, once her mother had passed, she no longer had living parents, or grandparents, which prompted her to start making visits to her local nursing home. She arrived with flowers in hand and asked the front desk person which residents haven’t had many visitors in awhile.

Much to her surprise, the front desk worker replied that most residents don’t get visitation all that often. That day, Spivey was assigned two sisters, each of whom hadn’t expected anyone to come. After chatting together for a few hours, Spivey had “fallen in love” with each of them, and felt like she had been “sitting with her grandma and mom all over again.”

@brittanydspivey If youre in the mood for a beautiful story time 🥹🫶🏾❤️ #storytime #nursinghome #family ♬ The Song of Angels - Before the Throne

Pretty soon, Spivey began making regular visits, which included dropping off occasional gifts. To make sure she was actually getting her gal pals something they’d enjoy, she asked them, “Is there anything you need?”

Their response? “Girly things”: Butterfly hairclips, lip gloss, hair bows, little accessories, even a jewelry making kit. Not the basic toiletries or clothing items Spivey anticipated, but full-on kiddie toys.

Of course, Spivey was happy to oblige. The next day she and her daughter arrived with little trinkets to help make them “feel like the girls that they are.” And after that, the sisters got so excited each time they would see her.

“It was so beautiful. I miss my mom… I miss my grandma…so beautiful because I still get to have that relationship,” Spivey concludes> She then encourages everyone, but especially those who have lost a loved one, to dedicate a free day to their local nursing home or assisted living facility, and particularly to seek out the residents who don't get regular visitors.

@brittanydspivey 🥹❤️🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾
♬ flower day - jeanie

Spivey’s story certainly touched many viewers, and even inspired a few folks to follow in her footsteps.

“Because of this, I have volunteered for a nursing home this Thursday. Thank you.”

“I’m gonna volunteer. I’m going to be unemployed and it sounds like a beautiful way to connect. We’re human and want connections.”

Others chimed in to share their own beautiful experiences.

@brittanydspivey Replying to @earthtotiana this comment makes me SOOOO happy ! 🥹🫶🏾❤️ Heres another update! #nursinghome #love #family ♬ Secret Place - Deeper Soaking Worship


“I did this. I met a man who cried every time I left, and forgot me every time I came. He showed me photos one day, and I realized he was my neighbor from across the street when I was a kid.”

“I became penpals with a man in a nursing home during Covid. We wrote to each other every week for three years. He passed away a year ago and I miss Harold every day.”

A few nursing home workers also noted how it is indeed a precious thing when someone visits, and how easy it really is to make their day: “I work at a nursing home, especially with dementia residents. No one visits them, and all they do is pace around the halls calling out for loved ones. It’s heartbreaking.”

“I work at a nursing home. It’s so true! They just want love, someone who listens to them, and simple things.”

This story beautifully captures how with age comes a return to childlike joy. Many of us in our inherent (and taught) fear of growing older forget that it also comes with this blessing. It also reminds us that while we might not be able to physically interact with those who have moved on, we can still experience the deep connections created by those relationships if we only seek them out.