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The group turning religious leaders into LGBTQ rights crusaders in Kenya

The group turning religious leaders into LGBTQ rights crusaders in Kenya

This piece was first published on Reasons to Be Cheerful and is part of the SoJo Exchange from the Solutions Journalism Network, a nonprofit organization dedicated to rigorous reporting about responses to social problems.


Penda* did not feel worthy of a seat at the table with the 15 religious leaders she found herself nervously sitting across from, seven of them Christian, eight of them Muslim.

"Before I attended that forum, I knew that I was a sinner," she recalls. "I didn't think it was possible for me to go near a church. I didn't even think that I could have a conversation with a religious leader."

Yet in 2014, Penda, a masculine-presenting lesbian, found herself in conversation with these faith leaders, all of whom believed — and in many cases preached — that homosexuality is evil. But this was no ordinary conversation. At Penda's side were three other people: a Kenyan gay man, a sex worker and someone living with HIV. None of the faith leaders knew these details. That information was held back — until just the right moment presented itself.

The forum was part of a strategic faith engagement session organized by Persons Marginalized and Aggrieved in Kenya (PEMA Kenya), a sexual and gender minority group in the coastal city of Mombasa. In Kenya, where the LGBTQ community is a frequent target of conservative religious leaders, who preach discrimination and sometimes even violence against them, PEMA Kenya takes an unusual approach: it works to "convert" faith leaders to the gay rights cause by introducing them to LGBTQ people, face to face, to build empathy, compassion and understanding.


The carefully orchestrated encounters require the utmost care — for all involved. "We don't aim to 'sensitize' religious leaders," says Lydia Atemba, a member of the faith engagement team. "We also prepare and equip our community to participate in dialogue with them. We try to bridge the gap on both sides."

The most unlikely allies

The five-day event attended by Penda and the 15 religious leaders was ostensibly to discuss barriers to health care faced by marginalized people who have HIV. For the first three days of the forum, no explicit mention of homosexuality was uttered.

"We [then] brought other queer members into the sessions and they spoke with the religious leaders," says Pastor McOveh, a queer pastor who helps to facilitate the program. (He requested his first name not be used.)

Penda was one of them. Now 44, she calmly shared her experience as a lesbian living in Mombasa. She had moved there in 2010, leaving behind the ruins of Kitale, a cosmopolitan town in Kenya that was struggling to recover from the 2007 election crisis. She described to them how she was verbally abused, and how she had been forced to sever ties with her spirituality because of faith leaders preaching anti-gay violence and discrimination.

"I have had troubles reconciling my sexuality and faith," she told the group.

She says sharing her personal story was surprisingly effective. The faith leaders' beliefs weren't instantly transformed, but, she says, "I think I saw a lot of compassion in some of them."

She was right. One of the conservative religious leaders in attendance that day was Pastor John Kambo. A pastor at the Independent Pentecostal Church of Kenya, Kambo was well known for his public attacks on the LGBTQ community. He once declared that "the gender and sexual minorities, especially in worship places, are cursed sinners and will go to hell."

This wasn't Kambo's first PEMA session. The organization had been holding discussions with him for four years, gradually drawing him onto their side. "It was just follow-up meetings — continuous engagement overtime [to] change the way [he] sees things," recalls Ishmael Bahati, PEMA Kenya's executive director and co-founder. During this period, Kambo began reflecting on what the Bible says about love. According to transcripts from PEMA Kenya, he ultimately said that "continuous participation in these trainings opened my mind and I realized that we are all human beings." The meeting with Penda was his last as an outsider — afterwards, he joined PEMA Kenya as an active, dedicated member, and remained one until his death last month.

In the end, Kambo became an unlikely friend to the queer community. He underwent PEMA's Training of Trainers, which taught him how to carefully discuss LGBTQ concerns with his fellow faith leaders. But his conversion came at a price. He was excommunicated from the church for three years, and his marriage hit the skids. He continued to be an ally, however, and in 2018 he became the first religious leader to be nominated as a "Human Rights Defender" by the National Coalition of Human Rights Defenders — Kenya.

That same year, Kambo invited Pastor Benhadad Mutua Kithome to a PEMA discussion. "PEMA Kenya produced good notes, and they were helping us very much," Kithome says of that meeting. "Some pastors were not agreeing with them — they were just agreeing with what the scriptures say. The way Sodom and Gomorrah was. The way, because of homosexuality, people were punished. But because of this training, some pastors, especially me, came to understand."

Athumani Abdullah Mohammed, an Ustaz (Islamic teacher) whose view of queer people changed gradually after partaking in a PEMA session in 2018, had a similar experience.

"When I got a chance to engage, it was not easy because… I work with conservative organizations," he says. "The whole gospel I was hearing was against 'this people,' as they called them. I thank my brother Ishmael because he was so persistent. He brought me on board. The funny thing is, the first meeting we held was not a good meeting. I was so against everything they were saying, but he saw something in me which I couldn't see by myself. And he kept on engaging me. Now, I learned to listen and I opened myself to listen. I listen to what I want to hear — and what I don't want to hear."

Converting a culture

The coastal city of Mombasa is a conservative place. Religion is at its core, and local faith leaders wield outsized influence, often preaching violence against the queer community.

"Rhetoric vilifying LGBT people, much of it by religious leaders, is particularly pronounced on [Kenya's] coast, and shapes public perceptions," according to a Human Rights Watch report.

This was the environment into which PEMA Kenya launched in 2008. Started as a health and social wellbeing community for gay and bisexual men following the tragic death of a gay man in Mombasa — he became sick and was abandoned by his family — the group later expanded to accommodate other gender and sexual minority groups. Then, in 2010, a call to "flush out gays" by two major religious groups — the Council of Imams and Preachers of Kenya (CIPK) and the National Council of Churches of Kenya (NCCK) — led to a spate of attacks on queer people.

The violence became a catalyzing moment for PEMA Kenya. "We thought that it is a good time to have a dialogue with the religious leaders," recalls Bahati, "to see if we can have a lasting solution for the attacks."

The organization appears to be making progress toward that goal. Until five years ago, Bahati says, Ramadan, which concluded this month, was a particularly dangerous time for queer people in Kenya's coastal region. A U.S. government report supports this observation, concluding that "the highest incidences of violence in the Kenyan Coast, which has a largely Muslim population, are reported during Ramadan."

For this reason, organizations like PEMA used to focus on simply keeping LGBTQ people safe from harm during these weeks. "Most organizations were looking for funds to relocate people, to support people" during this period, says Bahati.

But this year's Ramadan has been different. Attacks on queer folks are down, Bahati reports. "Things have really changed." He believes PEMA's years of meticulous relationship building are beginning to bear fruit. To date, PEMA has trained 619 religious leaders, 246 of which are still active members in the network. These members are crucial to spreading the acceptance of queerness in their congregations and communities in Mombasa and across Kenya. They also facilitate events alongside queer pastors and Ustaz, and review the group's strategic faith engagement manual, Facing Our Fears.

According to Jide Macaulay, an openly gay British-Nigerian priest, the influence religious leaders hold over public perception makes them invaluable allies. In his experience, building radical queer institutions in a place like Mombasa just isn't effective. This is something he learned first-hand — in 2006, Macaulay founded House of Rainbow, the first queer church in Nigeria. It was considered an affront to the societal and religious norm, and met with hostility. It lasted only two years.

"My largest focus was on the [queer] community, not necessarily on the rest of the society," he says. "We didn't take time to educate the society. House of Rainbow would have benefitted if we had allies within the community. [It] would have benefitted if we started maybe as a support group rather than a full-blown church."

Now, like PEMA Kenya, House of Rainbow has evolved to make engagement with Christian and Islamic faith leaders the core of its mission, holding forums in Malawi, Zambia, the Democratic Republic of Congo, South Africa, Lesotho, Botswana, Zimbabwe and Ghana.

What the scriptures say

Bahati's expertise as an Islamic scholar comes in handy. For instance, he notes that the role of language is key to winning converts to an inclusive community.

During PEMA's strategic meetings, faith leaders are introduced, carefully and tactfully, to humanizing language. "You see, the word homosexual, lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer are not bad words," says Macaulay. "Society has made them scary." PEMA's facilitators explain appropriate usage, context and meanings, and the harmful implications of using such language as slurs.

"What we say is that language is not innocent," says McOveh, the gay pastor. "Most of the time we realize that faith leaders use language unknowingly."

Of course, simply teaching more sensitive language is only the first step. In the Bible and Quran, certain verses and stories are still used to justify homophobic slurs and attacks.

"You realize that scriptures have different interpretations," says McOveh, "so we try to find common ground to tell them that, see, there is this which is provided by the religion and this which is given as perception." Macaulay echoes this point. "Looking at the Bible, there's a history of bad theology, mistranslation, and that mistranslation has caused many churches not to understand that homosexuality is not a sin. Homosexuality is not like robbery or theft. Homosexuality is like being Black. Homosexuality is like being albino. There are things that you just cannot change…Homosexuality is not a crime and it should never be criminalized."

While groups like PEMA Kenya and House of Rainbow have battled systemic homophobia in society, their efforts are still "a drop of water in the ocean," says Macaulay.

Homosexuality remains illegal in Kenya. The Penal Code explicitly criminalizes it, and a conviction can carry a prison sentence of up to 14 years. Petitions filed in Nairobi and Mombasa high courts in 2019 to rule these laws unconstitutional were both dismissed this year. Appeals have been filed, but according to Michael Kioko, a lawyer and LGBTQ advocate, it would take a long time to get a ruling.

"We'll have to wait for years to see whether the court of appeal will declare those provisions unconstitutional, and they may not," he says.

32 out of 52 African countries criminalize same-sex relations, with punishment ranging from death to lengthy prison terms. In some ways, these laws lend legitimacy to perpetrators of homophobic violence and discrimination.

The pandemic has presented PEMA Kenya with yet another challenge. The delicate work of working with new religious leaders can be risky, and the discussions can only take place in a secure location, says Mohammed.

"You cannot talk to people about these things in their area," he says. "You need to be very particular when it comes to safety because it's a lot of voices which are talking against this and people are willing to kill." Holding discussions with participants in an undisclosed location is safer, but it requires funding which PEMA has spent on taking care of needy community members during the lockdown.

Still, the efforts of PEMA Kenya's faith leaders continue to foster a safer city for a lot of queer people in Mombasa — in the streets, in the churches and mosques, and in their own homes. "[Now] someone can walk for a kilometer without being attacked," says Penda with relief. "Those were things that were not very much happening back then."

*Name has been changed to protect the person's identity.


dog experiments, dog tongue cleaner than humans, experiments by kids, cool science, dogs, fun science, experiments, science

A young teen boy holding a beagle.

Dogs come in a wide variety of breeds, along with their own unique personalities and needs. They can be guardians, helpful workers, loyal friends, snuggly companions, but there's one thing almost all dogs have in common: Licking.

Sure, some dogs lick way more than others, but it's rare to find a dog who never licks anyone or anything. Many dogs communicate and show affection by licking, which is sweet—if a little gross—depending on how slobbery they are. There's a common saying that dogs' mouths are cleaner than humans', which is a bit hard to believe when you see what some dogs put in their mouths, but it is true?


What does science say about dog tongues and saliva? Is a dog licking our face something we should worry about?


dog experiments, dog tongue cleaner than humans, experiments by kids, cool science, dogs, fun science, experiments, science A man being licked by a golden retreiver. Photo credit: Canva

It turns out, the answer to whether a dog's mouth is cleaner than ours isn't super straightforward.

An 8th grader named Abby tackled this question in a science experiment that won her a Young Naturalists Award from the American Museum of Natural History in 2011. Her family had gotten a dog and her mom kept telling her not to let the dog lick her face because dog mouths are full of bacteria. Instead of arguing, Abby decided to find out herself if this was true.

"I hypothesized that human tongues would be cleaner than dog tongues," she wrote. "I thought this because humans brush their teeth at least once a day. I hypothesized that dogs' tongues would be dirty because they were always licking dirty things like garbage."

After diving into the research about bacteria that live in and on humans and dogs, Abby decided she had a testable hypothesis. But this wasn't any old middle school science experiment. She applied for and got a grant to the State Hygienic Lab at the University of Iowa, where she was assigned a mentor to work with her.

You can read the nitty-gritty details of her experiment here, but it involved a lab, swabs, agar plates, and more. Here was the conclusion:

dog experiments, dog tongue cleaner than humans, experiments by kids, cool science, dogs, fun science, experiments, science A dog's tongue close-up. Photo credit: Canva

"I concluded that dog and human mouth flora are very different. (Flora means the bacteria found in a mouth or anywhere else.) The bacteria found in human mouths are more similar to another human's oral bacteria than the bacteria found in a dog's mouth.

"I also concluded that dogs' mouths are cleaner than humans' in some ways, and dirtier in other ways. Humans have more bacteria in their mouths than dogs do, based on the total number of bacteria. Most of the humans had a 'moderate' number of bacteria, and most of the dogs had 'few' bacteria. A possible explanation of this might be that dogs pant a lot, and maybe while panting, bacteria falls off their tongues along with their saliva. But dogs had more types of bacteria. The average number of different bacterial colonies in a dog's mouth was about 5.7. The average number of different bacterial colonies in a human's mouth was about 4.1. I think this is so because dogs sniff and lick a variety of things, like carpets, floors, chairs, grass, etc., so they pick up bacteria from many places."

But what about the licking of our faces? That's a bit of a subjective call, but Abby's results gave her some peace of mind:

"In conclusion, will I let my dog continue to lick me? The answer to the question is yes!" she wrote. "I will feel guiltless about letting my dog lick me because I found out that human and dog oral bacteria are different, so my dog's oral bacteria present no harm to me."

What do the experts say?

According to Colin Harvey, professor at the University of Pennsylvania’s School of Veterinary Medicine and executive secretary at the American Veterinary Dental College, comparing dogs' mouths to humans' mouth is "like comparing apples to oranges." As Abby found, the microbes in a dog's mouth are very different than those in a human's.

The American Kennel Club elaborates:

"Most of the bacteria in your dog’s mouth aren’t zoonotic, which means you probably won’t get a disease from a big old doggy kiss. There are exceptions to this. Dogs that eat a raw diet are at an increased risk of contracting salmonella, which can be spread to humans. You also probably shouldn’t share kisses with a dog that regularly raids the litter box.

In other words, kissing your dog is less risky than kissing another human, but that doesn’t mean that your dog’s mouth is necessarily cleaner than a human’s—they just have a mostly incompatible set of germs."

Keeping your dog's mouth healthy through regular teeth cleaning and dental check-ups can also help prevent issues that could potentially come from dog licks.

dog experiments, dog tongue cleaner than humans, experiments by kids, cool science, dogs, fun science, experiments, science A golden retreiver getting their teeth brushed. Photo credit: Canva

So there you have it. If your dog doesn't eat a raw diet and doesn't go snacking in the cat box (or some other equally fecal-bacteria-ridden place), their kisses are probably not going to hurt you. Guilt-free pooch smooches for the win!

This article originally appeared last year.

Learning

Sleuths debunk 5 supposedly healthy things that are actually terrible ideas

"Detoxes / cleanses are great for clearing out your wallet."

healthy food; healthy options; unhealthy food; fasting; juicing; supplements

Sleuths debunk 5 supposedly healthy things that are actually terrible. 5 things to do instead.

A lot of people reach for convenient items advertised as healthy when they're short on time. The rise of health and fitness influencers has also contributed to the proliferation of confusing information about what is considered healthy, and what actually is. It's no wonder people sometimes make unhealthy choices, believing they're doing right by their body.

Some people took it upon themselves to parse out the gimmicks from the multi-million dollar health and fitness industry. Their revelations may surprise you. If you've fallen for the hype of an item or product that turned out to be a dud, it's not your fault. Some things are heavily marketed as healthy, while others are things we've grown up believing were healthy. In a world that can feel oversaturated with information, it can be difficult to have time to research everything.


Suddenly, everyone's drinking green juice or swearing by a new protein bar. Since the bars promise to taste like raw cookie dough without the risk of salmonella, you throw a few boxes in your grocery cart, hoping for the best. After all, it claims to provide all of the vitamins for the day, and you don't have time to cook.

healthy food; healthy options; unhealthy food; fasting; juicing; supplements Homemade granola bars with chocolate chips – perfect for a delicious snack!Photo credit: Canva

Instead of wondering, here are some things people think are healthy, but actually aren't, and what you can replace them with instead:

1. Cereal, granola, and protein bars

Cereal bars are quick to grab when you're running late. The same goes for granola and protein bars. Some people even use them as a meal replacement, but they're not as healthy as people like to believe. If you flip over the package, you'll be met with a high sugar content and very little actual protein in many cases. One person in the Ask Reddit thread is aghast, "We all need to be taught how to read nutrition labels. I was and am still absolutely shocked by the amount of sugar and sodium that are in most packaged foods, throw serving size in there, and it's totally bananas."

Try this instead:

If the goal is to make a healthier morning selection while still packing in a little extra protein, eating whole fruits with a side of peanut butter will fill you up. Whole vegetables, cheese cubes, or mixed nuts are also easy to grab but are full of needed vitamins and healthy fats, minus the high sugar content. Good RX reminds people, "Eggs aren’t just a morning treat. Make a batch of hard-boiled eggs to have on hand as a high-protein snack. One hard-boiled egg contains over 6 g of protein."

healthy food; healthy options; unhealthy food; fasting; juicing; supplements Refresh with a healthy green juice boost.Photo credit: Canva

2. Detoxes

There's a detox for everything. One person shares in a Reddit thread about things people think are healthy, but aren't, because detoxes don't work in the area you're expecting. They write, "Detoxes / cleanses are great for clearing out your wallet." According to the National Institutes of Health (NIH), some detoxes contain laxatives that may cause acute diarrhea, which can lead to dehydration and malabsorption. The organization also explains that, "Some juices used in 'detoxes' and 'cleanses' that haven’t been pasteurized or treated in other ways to kill harmful bacteria can make people sick." Others may result in kidney stones for some users due to the high amount of oxalate found in leafy green foods, often used for green detox juices.

Try this instead:

Instead of taking your chances on a detoxing cleanse, Alix Leestma, RDN, CSOWM, senior dietitian at MultiCare Center for Weight Loss & Wellness, tells MultiCare Vitals that staying properly hydrated and eating a balanced diet will allow your body to detox properly. People's liver and kidneys are designed to detox your body naturally. “When dehydrated, our blood is more concentrated," Leestma says, "But when adequately hydrated, you’ll have the same amount of toxins in the blood but in smaller concentrations, which is easier on the kidneys to filter through.”

healthy food; healthy options; unhealthy food; fasting; juicing; supplements Making fresh orange juice in the kitchen. 🍊Photo credit: Canva

3. Juicing/fasting

Juicing is a way people are fasting while still feeling like they're getting in their nutrients. One person voiced concerns that juicing alone wasn't effective in maintaining the nutrients of the fruit, so it's best to eat the whole fruit. Northwestern University recently did a study exploring the effects of juicing. The results were surprising.

"The juice-only group showed the most significant increase in bacteria associated with inflammation and gut permeability, while the plant-based whole food group saw more favorable microbial changes. The juice plus food group had some bacterial shifts but less severe than the juice-only group. These findings suggest that juicing without fiber may disrupt the microbiome, potentially leading to long-term health consequences," Northwestern writes. Senior author Dr. Melinda Ring, director of the Osher Center for Integrative Health at Northwestern University Feinberg School of Medicine and a Northwestern Medicine physician, says, “Most people think of juicing as a healthy cleanse, but this study offers a reality check."

Try this instead:

“If you love juicing, consider blending instead to keep the fiber intact, or pair juices with whole foods to balance the impact on your microbiome,” Ring explains. You can also eat the fruit whole to ensure you're getting the fiber needed if blending it doesn't sound as appetizing as juicing.

healthy food; healthy options; unhealthy food; fasting; juicing; supplements Be careful with supplements.Photo credit: Canva

4. High doses of supplements

There's a supplement for everything, and some people take as many as they can in an effort to fill in the gaps of their diet. But excess supplements can cause issues, one person reveals: "I got a kidney stone this way. Wasn't fun." According to Healthline, water-soluble vitamins are more benign, even when taken in higher doses, because the excess is excreted in the urine. Fat-soluble vitamins found in some supplements can cause dangerous toxicity levels that cause irreversible damage.

Katie Mohan, a 57-year-old woman, was close to needing a liver transplant after beginning a regimen of a turmeric supplement. A report of an increase in liver damage due to supplement use on NBC prompted her to seek medical care. She was hospitalized for six days. Dr. Dina Halegoua-De Marzio, a hepatologist at Jefferson Health in Philadelphia, tells NBC, “Natural does not mean safe. When you cook with turmeric, that could be really safe. But some of the supplements now are 2,000 mg-plus, which is a very high dose of turmeric." According to the World Health Organization, a daily dose should be no more than 0-3mg per kilogram (2.2 pounds) of body weight. Which means, even a man weighing 200 pounds should only take less than 300mg of turmeric a day.

Try this instead:

Get the appropriate nutrients through a balanced diet and stick to one multivitamin daily, instead of several different supplements. Adding more nutrient-dense foods can also aid in boosting the vitamins you're hoping to make up for with supplements, according to the Navy and Marine Corps Public Health Center.

crowd, unique, personality type, nonconformist
Photo Credit: Canva

A person stands out in a crowd.

So many of us have the desire to compartmentalize our personality traits into neat little boxes. "Oh, she's such an INFJ. Oh, he's such a Gemini." Some of it is rooted (well sort of) in psychology, such as the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, based loosely on Jungian ideas. Others rely on arguably less scientific data like stars and "rising signs." Humans aren't usually that simple.

That said, there's still value in understanding one's own personality and inclinations. Here's a confession: I've taken countless personality tests because I just couldn't figure out if I was an extrovert or an introvert. Neither description quite fit, and as someone constantly trying to understand what makes me tick, this has been frustrating.


Turns out, there are other options. The term "ambivert" got popularized in the 1930s (after being coined by Edmund S. Conklin in 1923), and it refers to a person "who has features of both an introvert (someone who prefers to spend time alone) and an extrovert (someone who prefers to be with other people) in their personality."

@tedtoks

Replying to @Factura🛄 now knowing what an ambivert is, how would you describe yourself? #ambivert #introvert #extrovert #adamgrant #psychology #TEDTalk #worklife

But for those who still don't quite relate, meet the otrovert. Just recently, psychiatrist Rami Kaminski published The Gift of Not Belonging, in which he discusses his coined term to describe a whole new type of personality. In an Insta-reel captioned "What is an Otrovert?" Kaminski mentions the polarization of introverts and extroverts. "When Jung invented the terms extrovert and introvert, he saw them as two fundamental orientations of the personality. I see the otrovert in the same way. A personality trait that faces away from the group."

He continues, "Extroverts and introverts are inherently communal, while the otrovert is an outsider to the group. In itself, it is not a problem or condition, nor is it a diagnostic label. It simply means that while most people learn to develop a sense of belonging to a specific group through social conditioning, otroverts remain social but not communal."

In writer Sarjna Rai's piece, "Struggle to Fit the Mold? The 'Otrovert' Personality Explains Why" for Business Standard, they write: "Unlike introverts or extroverts, otroverts are not defined by where they draw their social energy. Instead, the concept captures people who constantly feel like outsiders, and tend to look in a different direction altogether, not necessarily aligned with the rest of the group."

While it's impossible to group people into perfect categories, Rai explains that Kaminski claims the main thing that sets otroverts apart is their "reluctance to conform to group norms."

Writer Avery White lists signs one might be an otrovert in the article "7 Signs You Might Be an Otrovert" for VegOut. Among them is preferring "high-signal conversations and low-maintenance relationships." They give this as an example: "You’ll happily spend three hours exploring one idea with one person—and then not speak for weeks without either of you taking it personally. In other words, low pressure, low expectations, high connection.

Another on the list—and this is a big one according to Kaminski—is: "You can look extroverted in public—yet feel fundamentally 'other.'" This is actually the crux of the term, and in fact, what Kaminski formed The Otherness Institute for: as their website says, "those who feel they don't belong."

The site also shares that recognizing aspects of this type in yourself and others (if it applies) will help "balance between your individuality and your function as part of the social matrix that determines your well-being. The experience of otherness in a togetherness-minded world can be emotionally bruising. Often misunderstood and misdiagnosed, otherness may lead individuals to feel strange, lonely, and unwelcome in groups. Left unidentified, otroverts' non-belonging can result in a frustrating, futile lifetime effort of trying to 'fit in.'"

Some Redditors are scrambling to figure out if they fit into this category. In the subreddit r/INTP (referencing one of the Myers-Briggs personality types), the OP asks, "Maybe I am an 'otrovert?'" Under this, they write, "Dr. Kaminski described the otrovert child as 'neurotypical, friendly, curious, well-adjusted, and often popular' yet 'they resist being pressured into group activities.'"

While this can seem inconsequential in childhood, joining the peer group "becomes critically important" in adolescence, said the psychiatrist, and teens "start to gauge their self-worth based on the group’s ranking of popularity (or unpopularity).'

"Membership in a group, no matter how lowly, is better than being an outsider," he added. "Otroverts, however, are comfortable with being outsiders and find it impossible to feel like insiders, regardless of how welcome they are.'

There are a handful of commenters who feel seen, but many push back, claiming the term could easily apply to other personality traits. One writes, "I think it's easy to resonate with this description... but as some warning noted, there aren't enough studies done about this term that people should be running to adopt it. I resonated with it after reading about it... But I have ADHD and persistent depressive disorder... both of which coincide with the descriptions of an otrovert."

Time will tell if this new term sticks, but for now, it's helping a lot of people feel more understood.

This article originally appeared last year.


90s, Gen X, QVC, Hello Dolly, vintage dolls, porcelain dolls
Photo Credit: QVC, @80svintagevisions, Instagram

Two porcelain dolls being sold on QVC in 1991.

One of the most wonderful attributes of a QVC host is their ability to sell the heck out of anything. In 1991, this was the job of one such woman tasked with selling two porcelain dolls from the “Hello Dolly” collection by Albert E. Price. (A few online sleuths pegged her as Judy Crowell, though Upworthy spoke with her and she didn't recall.)

Whoever she was, this was quite a feat as these weren’t just any dolls. They were wide-eyed, cleft-chinned little siblings named Jaime and Jason. And they were certainly unique. Described as 16 inches and porcelain, the “brother/sister team” were selling for $50 each. (On screen, there’s a note that they retailed at $82 apiece.)


A clip of the set being hawked on QVC is making the rounds on social media, and it has many people genuinely intrigued. In the @Totally80sroom clip, we see two almost puppet-looking dolls, a boy and a girl, each clad in overalls with golden blonde hair. Jason is wearing a red hat, while Jaime has white bows in her hair. But it’s their expressions that truly stand out: both might be described by some as “frightened-looking” thanks to their intense, unique stares.

The camera zooms in on Jaime, who seems as if she’s side-eyeing the host with a tiny tear in one eye. The host asks, “Do they remind you of your two little ones? Or do they remind you of you and your brother when you were this age? Up to no good! Being put on restriction!”

She then laughs and tells a delightful story from her childhood. “Who was it… Jeff said to me, ‘Restriction? Who gets put on restriction? You get grounded!’” She lets out a hearty laugh. “Well, I was put on restriction! In first grade. And I remember my restriction was I couldn’t leave my own front yard. So I used to go up to the border. My border, where the grass—our grass—met the neighbor’s grass, and stand right on the edge. And say, ‘Nope! I can’t come over! I’m on restriction.’ So by the time the spanking was over, and all the sadness is gone from your eyes, then it became kind of a game.”

She pauses as if she's just remembering that she has a job to do. “And that’s probably what will happen to these two too. Fifty dollars for Jaime. And fifty dollars for Jason. It is your choice of porcelain dolls from Hello Dolly.”

dolls, clowns, porcelain, QVC, vintage dolls A white porcelain doll with a tear stain. Photo by Monique Layzell on Unsplash

The comments are fabulous. One points out the obvious. “They’re cute until you wake up in the middle of the night because of a noise and they’re sitting there staring at you!” Another has a similar thought. “They’ve looked like they’ve seen some stuff they weren’t supposed to.”

This person focuses on the excellent professionalism of the QVC host: “This hostess deserves an Academy Award for filling time talking about those horrendous dolls.”

These wouldn’t be the first dolls to raise some eyebrows. If TV and movies were an indication of the toys that kids had back in the '80s and '90s, it would seem we were all surrounded by clowns and Chucky dolls. While yes, we did have a few such things, they became more of a symbol of fear in media than in real life.

In a piece for Collider, feature writer Jenna Rae Isley discusses the 1982 Spielberg-written classic Poltergeist, in which a child’s toy clown becomes a nightmare for the audience. “In reality, a clown doll is just a clown doll. But in our imaginations and in Poltergeist, a clown doll is a sinister, watchful force, lurking ominously in the corner of our rooms, keeping us perpetually on edge until it ultimately makes its move.”

The very scary clown scene from the film Poltergeist. www.youtube.com, Moyer Movies

But according to research conducted by Scientific American staff, there are actual reasons that people across many cultures are afraid of clowns. After sending out a questionnaire with various clown-based scenarios, more people answered that they had coulrophobia due to ‘negative portrayals of clowns in popular culture’ rather than actual ‘frightening experiences with clowns.’” In other words, movie makers and artists determined them to be scary…and so they became scary. (Though according to the same research, some are truly afraid of the unsettling makeup, even that of Ronald McDonald.)

It’s worth noting that most people, at least according to this survey, are afraid of clowns because they’re masked. “In fact, the strongest factor we identified was hidden emotional signals, suggesting that for many people, a fear of clowns stems from not being able to see their facial expressions due to their make-up. We cannot see their ‘true’ faces and therefore cannot understand their emotional intent.”

To that point, Jaime and Jason do not seem to be hiding their true intent. They just seem scared…perhaps because they saw a clown.

feel good story, music, rock music, lost and found, musicians
Photo credit: Marcus Pollard on Facebook

Marcus Pollard is reviving a 77-year-old warehouse worker's lost rock music.

In the 1960s, Norman Roth and his band, The Glass Cage, were Canadian indie rockers who played small local shows and built enough of a following to land gigs in bigger cities. When Roth was 18, the band recorded a live performance that was never officially released and was eventually lost after they broke up shortly afterward. Now, thanks to a four-dollar thrift store purchase, the band's music is reaching a wider audience—58 years later.

In 2016, veteran rock music promoter Marcus Pollard bought an unlabeled vinyl record at a thrift store on a whim, despite the album being physically damaged. He fell in love with the six songs recorded on it and spent the next two years trying to track down any band members connected to the record.


"I searched in vain for two years trying to get any clue as to who was on the record, but to no avail," Pollard wrote on Facebook. "Then, in a last ditch effort I posted a clip on the Canadian Artists Records Appreciation FB page and... I got a hit!"

Pollard eventually received a reply that read, "Hey, that's my record!" from Roth, now 77 and working as a warehouse manager. Roth was floored that his band's long-lost recording had resurfaced, and he was able to listen to songs he hadn't heard in more than 50 years.

- YouTube youtube.com

After reuniting Roth with his lost music, Pollard went a step further. After consulting with the other band members, he set out to bring The Glass Cage's music back to life after remaining dormant for generations. Pollard spent the next eight years using his industry connections and expertise to officially release the album. Working with a team of professionals, he refurbished the damaged record, digitally remastered the songs, designed elaborate packaging, and developed a booklet detailing the band's impact on the Vancouver indie rock scene of the 1960s before they broke up.

The finished vinyl album, titled Where Did the Sunshine Go?, is scheduled for release on February 24, 2026.

"I feel like everyone has done something in their life that was dismissed," Pollard told CTV News. "And I wanted them to feel like what they created was actually important."

While Roth and his former bandmates are excited about the album's release, they aren't trying to relive their youth or chase the rock star dreams they once had. They're just happy that others will now have access to their music and are enjoying the ride.

"I'm not looking for accolades or super stardom—that's long gone," Roth told CTV News. "It's just saying to the world, 'I was here.' And I hope they enjoy it."

If you'd like to hear Roth's music, you can stream tracks by The Glass Cage on Bandcamp and purchase the vinyl when it's released.