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Gay man has the perfect comeback to a woman who won't stop hitting on him at a bar

Unwanted attention is unwanted attention.

lgbtq, straight women, flirts
via Petr Sidorov/Unsplash and Max Harlynking/Unsplash

A woman is flirting with a gay man at a bar.

A gay man is getting some love for the way he handled a straight woman at a bar who behaved rather entitled towards him. A Reddit user named KineticVibes was out with his friends when he noticed a woman trying to get his attention. “I (25M) was out with friends last night and we went to a bar. This girl made eye contact with me when I walked in and I smiled at her. Me being a gay man I thought nothing of it,” KineticVibes wrote.

The woman approached him after realizing he wasn’t reacting to her flirtations from across the bar. “About 20 minutes later, the same girl walks up to my friends and me, and it's clear she is very drunk and says to me, ‘Do you want to buy me a drink?’ To which I replied, ‘No, sorry, I'm here just to hang with my friends,’” he continued.

She was clearly taking an aggressive approach by walking up and asking him to buy her a drink. Why didn’t she just ask what he was drinking and buy him a drink instead? She also unintentionally put him in a very uncomfortable spot because he didn’t want to tell her he was gay.

Even though it’s 2024 and people are a lot more accepting of people’s sexuality, you never know when a drunk person in the bar will have a problem with someone being gay and try to start a fight. “I am still not totally comfortable telling any old stranger on first meeting that I'm gay—so this seemed like the best course of action for me,” KineticVibes wrote.

Even though he was polite, the girl kept prodding him.

“She looks rejected and a bit frustrated now behind her glossy eyes and says, ‘A pretty girl wants to drink with you and you say no?’ Now I'm getting frustrated, and I kind of snap and say, ‘Well, I'm gay, so pretty girls don't work on me.’”

“She snarkily laughs and says, ‘Well, if you ever decide to date women, let me know,’ to which I very snappily reply, ‘If you ever decide to become a man, let me know,’” KineticVibes said. The quick-witted response made his friends a bit uncomfortable.

“You could tell it embarrassed her and my friends all kind of got mad at me, saying that I should have patience and be nicer,” he concluded the story.

But did he need to be nicer to the woman? She tried to make eye contact, but he didn’t respond. Then she asked him to buy her a drink, to which he said no, politely. She then doubled down and asked why he wouldn’t buy one for her because she was pretty. Just about everyone in the comments on the story thinks he did the right thing by responding to her snark with a bit of sass. "I would’ve bought you a drink after that. Handling with humor 10/10," A_Bull_Nuts responded.

Others thought the woman acted entitled by demanding a drink and got what she deserved. "If she was a dude, people would call her an incel for behaving like she's entitled to anyone's attention. It's not cute when dudes do it. It's not cute when dudettes do it," NotSoBunny wrote.

"This is what I came here to say... She reeks of entitlement! She put herself out there and got shot down and then doubled down. She may not be a man, but she's got a huge set of balls demanding a stranger pay her way," formiddabble-opponent added.


This article originally appeared in April.

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Joy

5 things that made us smile this week

Grab your tissues and read some seriously good news.

Grab your tissues and get ready for some seriously good news.

True

After a harrowing election season, we could all use an emotional pick-me-up. Thankfully, the internet never fails to deliver. Check out five uplifting stories we’ve found that made us smile this week.

Enjoy—and don't forget to share the love!

1. This toddler's adorable reaction

@vita.paskar This is when things start to get exciting 🥹 when they begin to understand! #fyp #christmas #target #toddler ♬ Rockin' Around The Christmas Tree - Brenda Lee

Victoria Paskar’s son Ellis had just been born last December, so when it came to appreciating the magic of the holiday season, it wasn't something he was really able to do. This year, however, that’s changed: In an adorable TikTok video, Paskar caught the moment when Ellis (now a toddler) notices the lit-up trees and holiday decorations. So magical and pure in every way.

2. More meals for seniors in need

Subaru - Share the Love Event and Meals on Wheels

Hunger is a national problem, and one that Subaru is helping to fix. Thanks to the Subaru Share the Love Event, Subaru has delivered more than 4.6 million meals and friendly visits to seniors facing hunger and isolation. Since 2008, Subaru is the largest automotive donor to Meals on Wheels—and they’re just getting started. With every new Subaru sale, Subaru and its retailers donate at least $300 to charities like Meals on Wheels.

3. This five-year-old piano prodigy brings down the house with Mozart

Alberto Cartuccia Cingolani wows audiences with his amazing musical talents.Pianoforte/Facebook

A clip of a five-year-old performing at the 10th International Music Competition in Italy is now going viral, and it’s no surprise why. To little to even reach the pedals with his feet, Alberto Cartuccia Cingolani still wows the audience with a masterful performance of a Mozart piece. According to his mother, Alberto had participated in seven national and international music competitions and won first place in all of them, all by the time he was four and a half. It’s like he’s channeling Amadeus himself.

4. An adopted man reunites with his bio mom and forms a "sweet" connection

Lenore Lindsey and Vamarr HunterABC 7 / YouTube

When 50-year-old Vamarr Hunter decided to take a genealogy test to find his biological mother, he had no idea how close he had already been to finding her. After a genealogy test, Hunter discovered that his mother, Lenore Lindsey, who had given him up for adoption as an infant, was actually the owner of “Give Me Some Sugar” in South Shore Chicago—Hunter’s favorite bakery. The two experienced an “immediate connection” after meeting, and after Lindsey suffered a stroke, Hunter stepped in to manage the bakery full-time. No, you’re crying.

5. A teacher uses AI to inspire her classroom

Now this is wholesome: An elementary teacher in Turkey named Gülümser Balci used artificial intelligence to create images of her students as their future selves in their dream jobs. Each kid is shocked and delighted to see themselves as adults, living out their dreams.

For more things that'll make you smile, check out all the ways Subaru is sharing the love this holiday season, here.

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Why didn't people smile in old photographs? It wasn't just about the long exposure times.

People blame these serious expressions on how long they had to sit for a photo, but that's not the whole picture.

Public domain images

Photos from the 1800s were so serious.

If you've ever perused photographs from the 19th and early 20th century, you've likely noticed how serious everyone looked. If there's a hint of a smile at all, it's oh-so-slight, but more often than not, our ancestors looked like they were sitting for a sepia-toned mug shot or being held for ransom or something. Why didn't people smile in photographs? Was life just so hard back then that nobody smiled? Were dour, sour expressions just the norm?

Most often, people's serious faces in old photographs are blamed on the long exposure time of early cameras, and that's true. Taking a photo was not an instant event like it is now; people had to sit still for many minutes in the 1800s to have their photo taken.

Ever try holding a smile for only one full minute? It's surprisingly difficult and very quickly becomes unnatural. A smile is a quick reaction, not a constant state of expression. Even people we think of as "smiley" aren't toting around full-toothed smiles for minutes on end. When you had to be still for several minutes to get your photo taken, there was just no way you were going to hold a smile for that long.

But there are other reasons besides long exposure times that people didn't smile in early photographs.

1800s photographsWhy so serious? Public domain

The non-smiling precedent had already been set by centuries of painted portraits

The long exposure times for early photos may have contributed to serious facial expressions, but so did the painted portraits that came before them. Look at all of the portraits of famous people throughout history prior to cameras. Sitting to be painted took hours, so smiling was out of the question. Other than the smallest of lip curls like the Mona Lisa, people didn't smile for painted portraits, so why would people suddenly think it normal to flash their pearly whites (which were not at all pearly white back then) for a photographed one? It simply wasn't how it was done.

A smirk? Sometimes. A full-on smile? Practically never.

"Mona Lisa" by Leonardo da Vinci, painted in 1503Public domain

Smiling usually indicated that you were a fool or a drunkard

Our perceptions of smiling have changed dramatically since the 1800s. In explaining why smiling was considered taboo in portraits and early photos, art historian Nicholas Jeeves wrote in Public Domain Review:

"Smiling also has a large number of discrete cultural and historical significances, few of them in line with our modern perceptions of it being a physical signal of warmth, enjoyment, or indeed of happiness. By the 17th century in Europe it was a well-established fact that the only people who smiled broadly, in life and in art, were the poor, the lewd, the drunk, the innocent, and the entertainment […] Showing the teeth was for the upper classes a more-or-less formal breach of etiquette."

"Malle Babbe" by Frans Hals, sometime between 1640 and 1646Public domain

In other words, to the Western sensibility, smiling was seen as undignified. If a painter did put a smile on the subject of a portrait, it was a notable departure from the norm, a deliberate stylistic choice that conveyed something about the artist or the subject.

Even the artists who attempted it had less-than-ideal results. It turns out that smiling is such a lively, fleeting expression that the artistically static nature of painted portraits didn't lend itself well to showcasing it. Paintings that did have subjects smiling made them look weird or disturbing or drunk. Simply put, painting a genuine, natural smile didn't work well in portraits of old.

As a result, the perception that smiling was an indication of lewdness or impropriety stuck for quite a while, even after Kodak created snapshot cameras that didn't have the long exposure time problem. Even happy occasions had people nary a hint of joy in the photographs that documented them.

wedding party photoEven wedding party photos didn't appear to be joyful occasions.Wikimedia Commons

Then along came movies, which may have changed the whole picture

So how did we end up coming around to grinning ear to ear for photos? Interestingly enough, it may have been the advent of motion pictures that pushed us towards smiling being the norm.

Photos could have captured people's natural smiles earlier—we had the technology for taking instant photos—but culturally, smiling wasn't widely favored for photos until the 1920s. One theory about that timing is that the explosion of movies enabled us to see emotions of all kinds playing out on screen, documenting the fleeting expressions that portraits had failed to capture. Culturally, it became normalized to capture, display and see all kind of emotions on people's faces. As we got more used to that, photo portraits began portraying people in a range of expression rather than trying to create a neutral image of a person's face.

Changing our own perceptions of old photo portraits to view them as neutral rather than grumpy or serious can help us remember that people back then were not a bunch of sourpusses, but people who experienced as wide a range of emotion as we do, including joy and mirth. Unfortunately, we just rarely get to see them in that state before the 1920s.

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Health

Most of us use our cell phones in the bathroom. Health experts say it's a big no-no.

It's not just about the germs.

Photo credit: Canva

A significant majority of people admit to using their phones on the toilet.

If you're reading this article on the toilet (no judgment), chances are you're not alone. According to a NordVPN survey of 10 countries, somewhere between 2/3 and 3/4 of us have a habit of using our phones in the bathroom. Another survey found that people ages 18 to 29 use their phones on the toilet a whopping 93% of the time. That means there’s a whole lot of throne scrolling happening, and probably a lot of denial that it’s happening as well.

After all, bathrooms aren’t exactly sanitary. Most of us can deduce that having a phone anywhere near a flushing toilet is likely to contaminate it with bacteria we don’t really want to swipe onto our fingers. Ew.

Experts say the bacteria-spreading potential of using your phone in the loo is a big reason to break the habit, but it’s by no means the only one.

First, yes, bacteria gets on your phone

Is it really that much of a risk to use your phone the bathroom? Most of us do it and seem fine, don’t we?

Let's put it this way. You wouldn't willingly swipe your finger around a toilet rim, right? Scientists at the University of Arizona have found that cell phones carry 10 times more bacteria than most toilet seats, and bringing our phones into the bathroom certainly doesn't help. Our immune systems can handle a lot, but we're still exposing ourselves unnecessarily to potentially harmful bacteria such as salmonella, E. Coli and C. Difficile when we use our phones in the bathroom (or when we use the toilet and don't wash our hands afterward).

via GIPHY

There are ways to minimize how germy your phone gets in the bathroom, such as paying close attention to what the phone is touching and what your hands are doing before you touch your phone. Closing the lid when you flush helps some, too.

Better yet, leave the phone when you gotta go, always wash your hands, and wipe down your phone with alcohol regularly. Simple, but so important.

Second, scrolling can make you spend too long on the toilet

This may not seem like a problem, but it is. Sitting on a toilet isn’t like sitting on a chair. Experts say you should spend no more than 10 minutes on the toilet to do your business, and preferably much less time than that.

“First, using your phone while doing number two can lead to prolonged sitting on the toilet, which can cause strain and pressure on your rectum and anus,” gastroenterologist Dr. Saurabh Sethi explained in a video. “This can lead to issues such as hemorrhoids, anal fissures and rectal prolapse.”

Yikes. We all know how easy it is to lose track of time when we're on our phones. When we're alone in the bathroom with nothing to distract us from our scrolling, it's even easier.

Sitting too long on the toilet can cause uncomfortable problems.Photo credit: Canva

Third, the phone addiction thing

In reality, it shouldn't be too hard for us to leave our phone behind for a few minutes to use the toilet. If we always feel the need to bring our phone with us into the bathroom, what does that say about our phone habits?

I'm not saying that everyone who uses their phone on the toilet is a phone addict, but there's a good chance we're not being as mindful as we probably should be about our phone use if we automatically whip it out on the toilet. And since nearly 57% of Americans say they are addicted to their phones, maybe setting a boundary for bathroom use is a good first step toward addressing the issue.

Finally, phones do occasionally take a toilet plunge

Dropping your phone into the toilet might sound like a joke, but it happens more often than you'd think. As of 2014, around 1 in 5 Americans had dropped their phone in the toilet. Considering how much phone usage has increased since then, it's doubtful that number has gone down.

via GIPHY

Whether it falls out of your back pocket when you pull your pants down or it just inexplicably slips from your fingers, dropping a phone in a toilet is not fun. You can imagine the various scenarios that would make it particularly bad, but even if it takes a plunge before you actually use the toilet, it's still a nightmare scenario. Nobody wants to fish a phone out of a toilet and try to figure out how to sanitize it. Not good for the phone, not good for you, not good for anyone. You can avoid the possibility completely by just not bringing the thing into the bathroom in the first place.

Habits die hard, but having solid reasons for wanting to change can be motivating. If you've been feeling iffy about bringing your phone to the toilet with you, see this as a sign to break that habit sooner than later. (Especially if you really are reading this on the throne.)

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Psychologist shares the 5 'core' memories your child will cherish from their childhood

A lot of parents will be surprised by her answers.

via Julia Kuzenkov/Pexels

A young girl relaxing in an inner tube.

There’s a popular trend where parents often share they are creating “core memories” for their children on social media posts, whether it’s planning an elaborate vacation or creating an extra-special holiday moment. While it’s important for parents to want their kids to have happy childhoods, sometimes it feels presumptuous when they believe they can manufacture a core memory. Especially when a child’s inner world is so much different than an adult's.

Carol Kim, a mother of 3 and licensed Marriage and family Therapist, known as ParentingResilience on Instagram, recently shared the “5 Things Kids Will Remember from Their Childhood” on her page. The fascinating insight is that none of the entries had to do with extravagant vacations, over-the-top birthday parties, or Christmas gifts that kids could only dream about.

According to Kim, the five things that kids will remember all revolve around their parents' presence and support. "Notice how creating good memories doesn’t require expensive toys or lavish family trips. Your presence is the most valuable present you can give to your child,” Kim wrote in the post’s description.

1. Quality time together

"Taking some time to focus only on your child is very special. Playing games, reading books, or just talking can create strong, happy memories. These moments show your child that you are present with them."

2. Words of encouragement

"Encouraging words can greatly impact your child during both good times and tough times. Kids often seek approval from their parents and your positive words can be a strong motivator and source of comfort.... It can help kids believe in themselves, giving them the confidence to take on new challenges and keep going when things get tough."

parenting, core memories, quality time

A mother and child riding a small bike.

via Gustavo Fring/Pexels

3. Family traditions

“It creates a feeling of stability and togetherness … Family traditions make children feel like they belong and are part of a larger story, deepening their sense of security and understanding of family identity and values.”

4. Acts of kindness

“Seeing and doing kind things leaves a strong impression on children. It shows them the importance of being kind and caring. They remember how good it feels to help others and to see their parents helping too.”

5. Comfort during tough times

"Knowing they can rely on you during tough times makes them feel secure and build trust. … Comforting them when they're struggling shows them they are loved no matter what, helping them feel emotionally secure and strong."

parenting, core memories, quality time

A family making a meal together.

via Elina Fairytale/Pexels

Kim’s strategies are all beautiful ways to be present in our children’s lives and to communicate our support. However, these seemingly simple behaviors can be challenging for some parents who are dealing with issues stemming from their pasts.

“If you find barriers to providing these things, it’s important to reflect on why,” Kim writes in the post. “There could be several reasons, such as parenting in isolation (we’re not meant to parent alone), feeling overstimulated, dealing with past trauma, or struggling with mental health. Recognizing these challenges is the first step to addressing them and finding support.”


This article originally appeared in June.

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Dad who can't swim rescues his toddler when their car is engulfed by flood waters

Nearby homeowners took the pair in to help them.

Photo credit: Canva

Dad who can't swim saves toddler from car during flood

Flooding can be extremely dangerous, especially flash flooding that seems to come out of nowhere during a torrential downpour. That type of flooding can be deceiving because it can take over roads so quickly that you don't realize it's flooded as badly as it is. Navigating flooding roads with your young child in the backseat is a recipe for a panic attack if things go wrong.

During a particularly nasty downpour, a new dad found himself in a stressful situation with his 11-month-old toddler while attempting to make their way home. Andre Randles lives in England with his partner Paige Newsome and their child Luca. The town had been getting snow and pretty significant rain which led to Randles being sent on another route due to road closures.

But the road closures sent him on a course that resulted in driving straight into a flooded area with no way to turn around. The water covered road he and his baby were on had an unexpected and sudden dip in it which resulted in the vehicle sinking quickly. Randles didn't have time to think, just act and it's a good thing, too. The father of one doesn't know how to swim and the realization that he and his child could drown if swimming were required may have caused him to freeze with fear.


"As soon as I saw danger, saw the water coming into the car and we were no longer floating and starting to sink, something switched in me. I thought I needed to get out and get Luca out," Randles tells the BBC.

That's exactly what he did. Randles rolled down the car windows climbing out before pulling his baby out through the back window in water that came to the man's chest. It was mere seconds before the entire car was almost completely submerged in the flood waters.

Giphy

Randles recalls to SkyNews, "I saw the water rising and it just clicked in my head I need to get me and my baby out of here safe so I wound down the window, climbed out wound down his window pulled him out and the water was about chest high. So I carried him above my head to make sure he hasn't touched any of the water or anything to try to keep him dry and warm."

The deep flood waters took Randles by surprise as he shares with SkyNews that he didn't feel like it was raining heavily at the time and had driven in much heavier rain. Pictures of the vehicle began to spread on social media which prompted Newsome to comment on one of them identifying the family's vehicle.

fathers day cute baby GIFGiphy

"This is our car, such a scary experience for my partner having to pull our 11 month old baby whilst the water was flooding into the car," the young mom reveals. "Calderdale Council need to sort this out ASAP! They have been getting notified about this part of Woodhouse Road multiple times by the owners of the house next to wear our car is parked."

The entire ordeal terrified the young family, "just imagine if my partner didn’t think fast enough to get the windows open to climb out and then get my son out. I dread to think," Newsome shares in another comment about her car.


The area where this happened is prone to flooding according to residents interviewed by news stations local to them, and residents who comment on the Calderdale Council Facebook page. They've been asking for something to do be done to address the excessive flooding but so far they haven't had much luck. Thankfully for Randles, he was able to escape the flooding and seek temporary refuge with a nearby resident who allowed them to get dry while waiting for rescue vehicles to reach them.

"To think that I could've actually lost them both makes me a bit emotional, yeah it's really scary. It's just a horrible thing to think about isn't it," Newsome reflects to the outlet.

Horrible indeed, hopefully the family never has to experience such a close call like this again and baby Luca will remain none the wiser.

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Oldest Home Depot employee in North America shares the key to living a happy life

A beautiful reminder to "treat the world like your family."

Photo credit: Canva

There's always a good reason to be kind.

We’ve all seen those videos where an influencer, posing as a regular joe, asks a person for help, and when that person does say yes to helping, the influencer repays that kindness with money, tickets to a game or some other amazing surprise.

This is the content bread and butter for Youtuber Zachery Dereniowski, otherwise known as @mdmotivator, one of the main catalysts of this philanthropic viral trend. Dereniowski has tons of videos capturing the exact moment when unsuspecting strangers had their lives changed forever, all because their generosity was recognized.

This time, our recipient ends up being the giver twice, thanks to the hard earned wisdom they depart.

In the video, Dereniowski appears at a Home Depot, and asks the friendly employee there, David Frank, and asks him for a dollar to purchase a nail since he “left his wallet at home” (this is one of Dereniowski’s signature setups).

After admitting he doesn't have any money from him, Frank asks Dereniowski what he needs the bolt for. When Dereniowski replies that it’s for his son’s desk, Frank not only decides he goes to pay for the bolt on his credit card, he marches back to the bolt aisle to select the right one for the job.

“[Why] are you gonna help me?” Dereniowski asks. To which Frank replies, “well you’re stuck and you have a problem, so we’re gonna try to help you.” Plain and simple.

It’s then we learn that only a week ago, an entire section of the Home Depot was cleared to celebrate Frank’s 100th birthday. He even made headlines as “The oldest Home Depot employee in North America.”

Dereniowski then asks Frank, “what’s the key to living a long, healthy life?”

“Treat the world like your family,” says Frank. “Be nice to them. Be sensible. That’s all.”


@mdmotivator “I am 100 years old” 🥹❤️ #kindness #homedepot #help #money #support #surprise #wholesome ♬ original sound - Zachery Dereniowski

Yep, we pretty much just got a Mister Rogers moment IRL. But Franks’s words are more than just platitudes. Research has indeed indicated that kindness can lead to longevity by giving us a sense of purpose, helping us connect to others and (perhaps most science-y of all) keeping inflammation levels down. But honestly, no amount of supporting evidence can really compare to how good we feel when being kind, compassionate and generous.

Clearly sticking to his message, when Dereniowski admits he did actually have his wallet with him and hands over $1000, Frank says that he’ll use the money to help another stranger. After he recovers from being stunned, that is.

Aside from getting a surprise grand, interactions like these are all in a day’s work for Frank. In his interview with Windsor Star, the centenarian shared that he enjoys his job because he gets to meet people and help solve their problems, saying “it keeps me busy and in the loop.” While there are certainly pros and cons to working after retirement age, this certainly shows how keeping busy can be beneficial. Not just busy, but mission oriented.

As for whether or not Frank plans to quit anytime soon, it seems he’s prioritizing “staying active.”

“What would I do? Sit at home and end up getting blisters on my rear end?” he told the Windsor star. “No way. I would never want to (spend) it that way.”

That’s the spirit, Frank. Here’s to another go round the sun.

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