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A 7-year-old asked to do more chores for the most adorable and heartbreaking reason

Dad figured "he wanted more Lego or something." Dad was wrong.

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Kids will act out in interesting ways when they want more attention.

Humans rarely say exactly what they mean or feel. With kids it's even moreso. They don't have the words and wisdom and experience to express the complicated emotions they might be feeling. So they reach out, or sometimes act out, in other ways.

Getting in trouble at school, not eating enough, throwing tantrums. Those are the tried-and-true classics. But sometimes kids show other, more unusual signs that they want or need something.

That might be what happened to one dad, who said his 7-year-old son recently came to him with a strange request: He wanted to do more chores.


kids, chores, cleaning, household, hygiene, parenting, dads, fatherhoodWhat kid would sign up for more chores?!Canva Photos

Yes, that's right, more chores. What kind of kid asks for more chores? The dad took his story to social media in a post on r/Daddit:

"I work a lot, and don't see my 3 kids that much during the week. I usually take them on fun amazing adventures on weekends in order to make up for it.

"Today my son said he wanted to do [chores[ to earn some money. I figured he wanted more Lego or something. He was talking to me more and he said he wanted to give me all the money he earns so I don't have to go to work anymore.

"It's really cute and heart melting, and also makes me feel like I'm a bad dad because him and his sisters don't get to spend enough time with me. Also I'm having trouble making him realize that all the money he gets from 'chores' comes out of what I make at work, so no matter how hard he works it would just make me go back to where I was beforehand."

It's so innocent and hilarious that the kid doesn't realize when he gets paid for doing chores, it comes from his dad's wallet, thus defeating the entire purpose. But it's a beautiful sentiment and the kind of thing that wrecks parents emotionally, both positively and negatively.

Fellow dads had a mixed, but emotional, response.

parenting, dads, fatherhood, men, mens health, mental health, kidsHow it feels to be a working parentGiphy

Some urged the original poster that his son was crying out for more attention, and that he'd regret not heeding the call:

"Id rather live just getting by and spending a ton of time with my toddlers, than working 60+ hours a week and never seeing them. Time is fleeting ... Take those 10 years and work a little less, come home early a couple days a week. Use your PTO. you'll regret missing their childhood."

"Obligatory Daddit-PSA: 'The only people who will remember you worked late are your children'"

"Here’s some tough love for you ... I don’t know your financial situation or occupation or even how many hours you work. Your kiddos basically throwing out a plead to spend more time with him, and probably the other 2 as well."

"Your son misses you. Hang out with him and your other kids, even if you're all doing chores together."

Others offered a supportive pat on the back for working hard to provide:

"That’s a punch in the gut. You’re not a bad dad just because you are working. (Unless you’re not spending time with them when you’re not working). Make sure he knows you love him and be grateful for his wanting to give you a gift. Then make some special time for him and try to give him regular, predictable amounts of your time."

"OP: You’re doing great - this means your kids want to spend time with you. My oldest had a sentiment like this after my wife was forced to stop working - she wanted to help."

"Hot take - but I think you’re killing it. He’ll see this very differently when he’s older, retrospectively. You’re doing what dads gotta do sometimes and getting bread. He’ll respect you for it."

There's a running theme of frustration among modern dads. We're trying to fill multiple roles, both the classic provider/protector role that our fathers and grandfathers played, but also a more nurturing and involved role in our children's lives.


fatherhood, men, dads, parenting, parenthood, children, kids, familyUnfortunately, modern fatherhood isn't all frolicking on the beach Photo by lauren lulu taylor on Unsplash

Dads are spending more time with their kids than ever, not content to sit on the sidelines for doctor's visits and playdates and day-to-day care. They're also working more than ever. Yes, technically working hours have been on a downward trend since the industrial revolution, but the data fails to account for lengthy commutes and the "always on" nature of many modern jobs. I don't know many parents who don't frequently catch up on work at night or respond to emails during family dinner time.

You don't have to have a Phd to see that the math doesn't math — there just aren't enough hours in the day to do it all.

For what it's worth, moms are facing a similar but even more extreme struggle. It's why parents are in big trouble according to the Surgeon General. Unfortunately, there's no easy answer. Dads like the original poster of this thread need to earn money and hold onto benefits like healthcare for their families. But their kids need them, too. For now, we're all just doing our best to try to do it all.

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It's not a phase.

One of the best lessons you can teach your kids is that they have the right to be who they are and who they want to be. One of the best ways to teach that lesson is to embody it yourself. Kids need your presence and your wisdom, but they also need your example. Be your truest self! Chase your dreams! Live without fear! It's the best possible way to show them that they can do it, too.

However, like all things in parenting, this lesson doesn't come without its own caveats. What if you embracing your truest self is, like, totally embarrassing? What if it causes other kids to bully your children, or gets them banned from playdates? That doesn't mean it's right for people to judge you, but it will probably happen if you're a loud or controversial dresser. As a parent, what are you going to do about it?

One dad recently found himself facing a conundrum: As a self-described "goth," and a larger guy to boot, he began to wonder if his unique style of dress might be having a negative impact on his kids.

"I'm a father of a 2 year old and 6 year old," the man wrote in a post on r/Daddit. "I dress like a [punk]/goth. It's nothing insanely extreme, just a lotta skulls and arm bands, couple chains on legs, rings. Stuff like that. ... I'm a rather large guy, 6' 7", so I already stand out."

gif of a man in white and black goth makeupGoths tend to stand out. Giphy

He says due to his size and dress, he's more than a little used to getting looks everywhere he goes. But then the dad of two recalls an incident at the playground that had him rethinking everything.

"Today at the park, I don't know, it felt like this lady was afraid of me? I keep to myself, smile a lot because I know I'm intimidating, and actively play with my kids, so I think it's kind of strange. After playing a while my daughter comes up crying. I ask her what's wrong, and she tells me 'my friend's mom said I can't play with you.' I look over and it's that same lady and she hurries and looks away.

"Later on, I'm holding my 2 year olds hand, walking him to the swings, and I overhear another kid ... go, 'ooh stay away from that guy. Stay away. My mom says he's bad'"

The user than asked the dad community for advice: Should he tone it down for his kids' sake? Ditch the skulls and chains to help them fit in and make friends more easily? Or would that be setting the wrong example?

The community was split on whether this dad should stop dressing goth. Great arguments emerged on both sides of a terrific debate.

Lots of parents encouraged the OP to stay true to himself, as the long-term lesson he'd be teaching his kids would be worth a little short-term discomfort.

goth teen walking through school halls and flipping his hairWhat's the price of staying true to you?Giphy

"Please never change your style. As your kids and your kids friends get older, you're going to be the 'cool dad.' Also, please consider the message you'd be sending to your children in changing yourself and being less authentic for the sake of making other people feel comfortable. It's not a healthy message to send."

"No you should model the behavior you want to see -- positive self expression, acceptance of differences, and kindness."

Others felt it was selfish of OP to continue dressing and behaving the same way he did before he was a father.

"It's not about you anymore, it's about your kids and the children they will interact with."

"OP should do what he feels is right, but those choices come with consequences. Personally, I can't imagine being so tied to how I dress that I would keep dressing that way even if caused distress for my daughter. Like, for what? They're just clothes. ... I get that some people are really attached to how they dress, like it's part of their identity. I can't personally relate, and fundamentally don't believe that how I dress defines who I am."

"I'm gonna be honest with you, and with love as a metalhead, that's kinda cringe my dude. Your clothes don't define you, and it sounds like your choice to dress like not-a-dad is going to force your kids to be outcasts. It's fine for us to be weirdo outcasts, we're adults, but you live in Mormon country and your kids don't get to choose who they see day to day at school. I dunno, swallow your pride, tone it down."

Some challenged this dad to dig deep. Was punk or goth clothing really essential to his identity? Or was it just something he was used to, or maybe something he used as a shield in social situations? These are big and important questions to answer before you decide if the way you dress is something you're willing to sacrifice. Others still suggested this dad find some kind of a compromise:

"Yeah I think finding a compromise is the best way forward, you can still be yourself but are also not scaring others around you (as unwarranted as it might be). And, remember you don’t always have to cut back. Probably 80% of the time you’re fine as you usually are, like at kids birthdays or something when you can get to know people etc. But if you’re gonna be around and potentially interacting with strangers’ children, it’s probably good to tone it down just a bit, just for your kids sake if anything."

Experts agree that when it comes to personal identity preferences that might embarrass your kids, compromise is key.

Rather than inflexibly insisting on "fully expressing yourself at all times," you may have to pick and choose a little more when you become a parent.

"It's important to maintain your authentic styles for most occasions. But the dad could think about toning it down in certain circumstances like school functions or when meeting new parents. That's because the focus is on the kid, about the kid, rather than himself," says Cory Reid-Vanas, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist at Rocky Mountain Counseling Collective. Reid-Vanas adds that kids often don't want to stand out, so extra attention may make them feel embarrassed. Though, these moments of conflict make for good conversation and teaching moments.

Ciara Bogdanovic, Licensed Psychotherapist at Sagebrush Psychotherapy,, says: "More important than how the parent dresses is their social relationships and how they handle situations. Children model their behavior after their parents. So it is important to model healthy friendships and how to deal with difficult social situations like rejection. Is the parent showing appropriate social skills on the playground? For example, is the parent greeting people and making friendly conversation?" In other words, a little extra smiling and proactive friendly behavior might help disarm judgmental bystanders.

Whatever the right answer is, the fact that this father is grappling with it so heavily said a lot about the love he has for his kids. In the very long run, that is definitely what they'll end up remembering most about him.

Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash
a man holding a baby in his arms

This time of year, the pediatrician is a parent's best friend. Moms and dads are making *frequent* trips with their sick kids. So when the usual 'parent on duty' (which according to Pew Research Center, is more commonly mom) delegates the trip to dad, it can lead to an amazing feat of teamwork–thanks to meticulous and thorough instructions and notes she prepares for her spouse on their kid's symptoms meant to be shared with the doctor. Dr. Greg GulbransenGreg Gulbransen, DO, a pediatrician in Oyster Bay, Long Island, shared a hilarious compilation video on Instagram featuring the dads that come to his office strapped with lists, notes and details from their wives to get the best care for their sick kiddos.

"Dear Mothers, have you ever wondered what your husbands look like when they arrive at the pediatrician’s office with your instructions? They read your lists like legal documents, terrified of making mistakes. True confession; SO AM I🤪," Dr. Gulbransen writes in the video's caption.

The video begins with with Dad #1 reading from his phone exact notes from his wife. "Woke up in the middle of the night. Felt warm. Had a headache and stuffy, runny nose." Dad #2 enters the chat: "So he started not feeling well on the 8th. Diagnosed with Mono on the 15th. He had a high fever and sore throat." In another clip, Dad #3 is holding his sick daughter while reading from his phone: "Past couple days has had a fever, congestion, a bad cough and a rattle in her chest." Dad #4 follows suit: "Please tell them that he went to school complaining of small tummy ache." And Dad #5 explains, "She told me 2 o'clock he had a fever...can we still go to Florida?!" And Dad #6 ends the clip with a zinger: "My wife sent me in with a list. If you like I can just send it to you and you can read it," as Dr. Gulbransen jokes, "Just give me this thing", as the dad hands his phone to him.

Dad lifeSick Get Well Soon GIF by All Better Giphy

The interactions are praised by Dr. Gulbransen, who focuses on encouraging the dads who come into his office for stepping up and stepping in to help their families–even if it's with assistance. "So this is particularly true on the weekends when dads do the chores," Dr. Gulbransen explains. "We want them to be happy, so we give them fist bumps and 'Dad, we've got this!' We run all sorts of tests, give them prescriptions. They leave happy, and at the end of the day it's an honor to be a part of the whole thing and it's a privilege to be taking care of your children. So let's hope all we have ahead of us is good health and happiness!"

#1 dadCelebrate Fathers Day GIF by Adventure CommunistGiphy

And Dr. Gulbransen's video garnered an emphatic response from wives. "I have even sent my husband with a list of instructions for when he goes to the doctor for himself! #SooooTrueeeee," one wrote. Another added, "So accurate 😂 Good on these dads!" And another wrote, "lol this is sooo accurate! And if you ask a question that’s not on the list ie:’would you like your child to get cuz vaccine while you’re here?’ Blank stare from dad. Along pause. Then, ‘let me call my wife.’ 😂😂😂" Another viewer noted, "Then mom calls the clinic to clarify after care instructions lol."

All illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.

I have plenty of space.


It's hard to truly describe the amazing bond between dads and their daughters.

Being a dad is an amazing job no matter the gender of the tiny humans we're raising. But there's something unique about the bond between fathers and daughters. Most dads know what it's like to struggle with braiding hair, but we also know that bonding time provides immense value to our daughters. In fact, studies have shown that women with actively involved fathers are more confident and more successful in school and business.

You know how a picture is worth a thousand words? I'll just let these images sum up the daddy-daughter bond.

A 37-year-old Ukrainian artist affectionately known as Soosh, recently created some ridiculously heartwarming illustrations of the bond between a dad and his daughter, and put them on her Instagram feed. Sadly, her father wasn't involved in her life when she was a kid. But she wants to be sure her 9-year-old son doesn't follow in those footsteps.

"Part of the education for my kiddo who I want to grow up to be a good man is to understand what it's like to be one," Soosh told Upworthy.

There are so many different ways that fathers demonstrate their love for their little girls, and Soosh pretty much nails all of them.

Get ready to run the full gamut of the feels.

1. Dads can do it all. Including hair.

relationships, fathers, dads

I’ve got this.

All illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.

2. They also make pretty great game opponents.

daughters, daughter, father

Sharing life strategy.

All illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.

3. And the Hula-Hoop skills? Legendary.

bonding, dad, child

Tight fitting hula-hoop.

All illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.

4. Dads know there's always time for a tea party regardless of the mountain of work in front of them.

family bond, parent, child-bond

Dad makes time.

All illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.

5. And their puppeteer skills totally belong on Broadway.

love, guidance, play

Let’s play.

All illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.

6. Dads help us see the world from different views.

sociology, psychology,  world views

Good shoulders.

All illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.

7. So much so that we never want them to leave.

travel, inspiration, guidance

More dad time please.

All illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.

8. They can make us feel protected, valued, and loved.

protectors, responsibilities, home

Always the protector.

All illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.

9. Especially when there are monsters hiding in places they shouldn't.

superhero, monsters, sleeping

Dad is superman.

All illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.

daddy-daughter bond, leadership, kids

Never a big enough bed.

All illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.

Seeing the daddy-daughter bond as art perfectly shows how beautiful fatherhood can be.

This article originally appeared nine years ago.