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Ever heard of union hero Joe Hill? He's missing from most history books today.

Joe Hill remains a legend and an inspiration today.

If you're a fan of folk music or lyrics about working people, you might be familiar with the song "Joe Hill."

The song, originally written as a poem by Alfred Hayes, has been performed for decades by the likes of Paul Robeson, Joan Baez (at Woodstock in 1969), Phil Ochs, and Billy Bragg.

Among the more memorable renditions is a version by Bruce Springsteen, who plays it here. Go ahead and start it playing while you read about who Joe Hill really was.

The song's lyrics recall a dream where Joe Hill, a workers' hero who was likely framed on a murder charge and sentenced to death, returns in a seemingly spectral form, symbolizing the spirit of the labor movement.

"I dreamed I saw Joe Hill last night
Alive as you or me
Says I, But Joe, you're 10 years dead
I never died, says he
I never died, says he..."



Joe Hill isn't a fictional character. He was a poet, songwriter, and a union activist.

(He also inspired the famous union phrase "Don't mourn, organize!" — but more on that later.)

Born Joel Emmanuel Hägglund, he came to the U.S. from Sweden in the early 1900s with the hopes of finding work. He adapted to his new home by changing his name to Joseph Hillstrom, which he later shortened to Joe Hill once he began to write songs.

Upon arrival in New York City, he sought employment as a migrant laborer but found opportunities sporadic and sometimes nonexistent. This sparked his interest in a labor union, which would give him and his coworkers a voice on the job no matter where they worked.

Image in public domain.

He found his calling when he discovered the Industrial Workers of the World (IWW).

One of the IWW rallying cries was "one big union," and its goal was uniting every working person worldwide into one union. That sat very well with Hill.

Having been raised in a musical family, he began writing songs, poems, and powerful speeches after joining the IWW. He became the resident lyricist and a frequent cartoonist.

Hill wrote songs about all different types of IWW members, from immigrant factory and railway workers to itinerant laborers moving across the country from job to job. His songs inspired people — and still do today.

His popularity grew when the IWW published the first version of its "Little Red Songbook" in 1909. The musical collection, bearing the subtitle "Songs to Fan the Flames of Discontent," was made up mostly of Hill's compositions.

The first edition of "The Little Red Songbook." Image by Hunter Gray.

It included the song "There Is Power in a Union" about ... well, power in a union, and "The Preacher and the Slave," about how religion causes people to fight for things in heaven rather than on earth:

You will eat, bye and bye
In that glorious land above the sky
Work and pray, live on hay
You'll get pie in the sky when you die
[Crowd shouts, "That's a lie!"]



(This is, in fact, where the phrase "pie in the sky" was born.)

Hill would show up at picket lines and strikes across the country, getting the crowd energized and resolute.

His activism drew the attention of authorities, too.

In June 1913, he was arrested for "vagrancy" during a dockworkers strike in San Pedro, California, and put in jail for 30 days. The real reason for the incarceration, according to Hill, was that he "was a little too active to suit the chief of the burg."

So, Hill was on the radar of cops and politicians who didn't want to see unions establishing a presence in their towns. He may have been even more worrisome to authorities than other union leaders since he could energize the workers and reinforce their solidarity with song.

Cover of "The Rebel Girl" by Joe Hill. First published in "The Little Red Songbook," it was released as sheet music in 1915. Image in public domain.

But one cold night in 1914, a turn of events made Joe Hill's name internationally known.

Hill, who was in Salt Lake City to work in the mines, knocked on a doctor's door at 11:30 p.m., needing treatment for a gunshot wound to his chest.

Hill told the doctor he had been shot by a rival suitor for a woman's affection — he never did tell anybody her name.

On that same night, a former police officer named John Morrison, now a grocery store owner, and one of his sons were killed by two people who didn't rob the store.

The murders appeared to be motivated by revenge, perhaps a holdover from Morrison's previous career. Another of Morrison's sons witnessed the shooting and stated that one of the two killers shouted, "We've got you now!" before pulling the trigger.

(And just to note: At least four other people were shot in Salt Lake City that night; it's just kinda how things were back then.)


Salt Lake City, 1890, by Charles Roscoe Savage. Image in public domain.

The doctor who tended to Hill's injuries noted that it was a gunshot to the chest — the same kind as the shopkeeper's surviving son said occurred with the intruder who killed his father and brother.

Over the next few days, 12 different men were arrested for the killings — and each, in succession, was released.

Around the time that the 12th man was cleared, the doctor came forward and offered his patient as a possible suspect. Hill was arrested.

When the grocer's son who survived saw Joe, he stated, "That's not him at all!" However, a few days later after the publicity started and authorities knew they had the famous Joe Hill, he changed his mind and claimed it was definitely Hill he saw that night.

Several aspects of the case made Hill an unlikely suspect.

His injury, a shot through the left lung, would have bled profusely. Yet authorities did not find any blood in the store other than the victims'. No bullet was ever found, nor was there a motive; Joe did not know the shopkeeper, and the assailants didn't even take the money in the register.

The trial itself was a poor excuse for justice, according to author William Adler. Although two young, unknown attorneys volunteered to defend Hill, it became clear partway through that they weren't doing anything of the sort. Hill requested new lawyers, which the judge refused. From that point on, Hill refused to participate in the trial at all, and remained silent.

(In a letter written in 1949, the woman who was there when Hill was shot, Hilda Erickson, confessed that it was her former fiance and a friend of Joe Hill's, Otto Appelquist, who shot him that fateful night.)

After just a few hours, the jury found the 35-year-old guilty. He spent 22 months in prison while he awaited appeals of his sentence: execution by firing squad.

Image via Today in Labor History. Lyrics from the song "Workers of the World, Awaken!"

The IWW sought help from other labor unions around the world, and support began to build.

Backers demanding his release and a retrial sent tens of thousands of letters and circulated petitions.

Among those advocates were then-President Woodrow Wilson, the Swedish minister to the United States, 30,000 Australian IWW members, American Federation of Labor President Samuel Gompers, and trade unions across the world. Even Helen Keller, the famed deaf and blind activist (who also belonged to the IWW), wrote to the president on Hill's behalf.

The efforts targeted Utah Gov. William Spry, who had been elected to office on a platform that stated he would "sweep out lawless elements, whether they be corrupt businessmen or IWW agitators." Unsurprisingly, he did not intercede on Hill's behalf.

The IWW logo, featuring one of its main slogans: "An Injury to One Is an Injury to All." After Joe Hill was executed, it was really taken to heart.


The governor's record was clear: He had broken a large mineworkers strike and helped the Utah Copper Company bring in strikebreakers who used hired thugs to defeat the union there. Not surprisingly, this did not help Hill one bit.

There's a famous union phrase: "Don't mourn — organize!" Here's the origin story.

While in prison, Hill kept writing poetry, music, letters, and more. In a Aug. 15, 1915, article in the weekly political magazine Appeal to Reason, he stated:

"The main and only fact worth considering, however, is this: I never killed Morrison and do not know a thing about it. He was, as the records plainly show, killed by some enemy for the sake of revenge, and I have not been in the city long enough to make an enemy.

Shortly before my arrest I came down from Park City; where I was working in the mines. Owing to the prominence of Mr Morrison, there had to be a 'goat' and the undersigned being, as they thought, a friendless tramp, a Swede, and worst of all, an IWW, had no right to live anyway, and was therefore duly selected to be 'the goat'.

I have always worked hard for a living and paid for everything I got, and in my spare time I spend by painting pictures, writing songs and composing music.

Now, if the people of the state of Utah want to shoot me without giving me half a chance to state my side of the case, bring on your firing squads - I am ready for you. I have lived like an artist and I shall die like an artist."





In one of his last letters, when writing to IWW founding member and leader William Dudley Haywood (better known as "Big Bill" Haywood), he wrote these practical yet poignant words:

"Goodbye Bill. I die like a true blue rebel. Don't waste any time in mourning. Organize... Could you arrange to have my body hauled to the state line to be buried? I don't want to be found dead in Utah."

Haywood changed that to the phrase that has been used by union activists ever since: "Don't mourn — Organize!"

The memory of Joe Hill's words lives on in the hearts of working people the world over.

Hill died on Nov. 19, 1915. According to author Philip Sheldon Foner, when the firing squad was instructed, "Ready ... aim," Joe Hill himself issued the final order before the commander: "Yes, aim! Let 'er go. Fire!"

30,000 people came to his funeral in Chicago. Eulogies were translated into 10 languages. The mourners sang songs by Hill and shut down traffic for hours as the funeral procession stretched for miles. Many had IWW patches, pennants, and red ribbons with the words, "Joe Hill, murdered by the authorities of the state of Utah, November the 19th, 1915."

Especially in times like these, when unions in the United States are very much on the ropes, it's good to remember the words from "I Dreamed I Saw Joe Hill Last Night," aka "Joe Hill" — "I never died, says he. I never died, says he."

I dreamed I saw Joe Hill last night
Alive as you or me
Says I, But Joe, you're ten years dead
I never died, says he
I never died, says he

In Salt Lake, Joe, says I to him
Him standing by my bed
They framed you on a murder charge
Says Joe, But I ain't dead
Says Joe, But I ain't dead

The copper bosses killed you, Joe
They shot you, Joe, says I
Takes more than guns to kill a man
Says Joe, I didn't die
Says Joe, I didn't die

And standing there as big as life
And smiling with his eyes
Joe says, What they forgot to kill
Went on to organize
Went on to organize

Joe Hill ain't dead, he says to me
Joe Hill ain't never died
Where working men are out on strike
Joe Hill is at their side
Joe Hill is at their side

From San Diego up to Maine
In every mine and mill
Where workers strike and organize
Says he, You'll find Joe Hill
Says he, You'll find Joe Hill

I dreamed I saw Joe Hill last night
Alive as you or me
Says I, But Joe, you're ten years dead
I never died, says he
I never died, says he







































Joe Hill's story is nearly 100 years old, but it still is not often told in schoolhouses and history books today. Why do you think that is?

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Dad's heartfelt lunch message shows how simple, everyday acts can change lives

You can make a huge difference by using O Organics.

via Meg Sullivan (used with permission) and Canva/Photos

A volunteer hands out food in a food bank and Meg Sullivan shares her dad's kind gesture.

When we consider people who have had a positive impact on the world, we often think of those who have made grand gestures to improve the lives of others, such as Martin Luther King, Jr., Greta Thunberg, or Mahatma Gandhi. Unfortunately, that type of effort is out of reach for the average person.

However, O Organics would like to remind everyone that they can positively impact the world through small, consistent acts of kindness that add up over time. Much like how a small creek can create a valley over the years, we can change lives through small, consistent acts of kindness.

O Organics is dedicated to the well-being of all by nourishing people everywhere with delicious organic foods grown by producers who meet USDA-certified organic farming standards.

Upworthy's Instagram page recently posted a touching example of everyday kindness. Meg Sullivan shared how her father, Tom, peeled oranges for her lunch just about every day from kindergarten through high school. But on the final day of her senior year of high school, he sent his 17-year-old daughter unpeeled oranges with a touching note about how she’d have to start peeling them for herself.



“It’s Time Baby Girl,” he wrote on a wikiHow printout on how to peel an orange with a drawing of himself crying. For the father, this daily ritual was about more than just making lunch; it was about showing that he cared by going the extra mile. “I could have put money on her lunch account,” Tom told Today.com. “But it’s one of those little things I thought was important, that she knows somebody’s taking the time to take care of her.”

The small, daily gesture taught Megan an essential lesson in kindness.

The post reminded people how their fathers’ small acts of kindness meant so much to them. “My dad peeled my oranges until I graduated high school, too. Now, I peel my daughter’s oranges and will for the next 7 plus years,” Katie wrote in the comments. “Love this. My dad peeled mine, too. When I moved out, he gave me an orange peeler gadget,” Mary added.

o organics, albertson's giving backO Organics has a wide array of foods and flavors covering almost everything on your shopping list.via Albertson's

Did you know that every time you go to the supermarket, you can also change the world through small gestures? O Organics not only allows you to feed your family delicious and nutritious organic food, but each purchase also gives back to help people and communities facing food insecurity.

Through contributions from customers like you, O Organics donates up to 28 million meals annually. The company’s contribution is essential when, according to the USDA, 47.4 million Americans live in food-insecure households.

O Organics has a wide array of foods and flavors covering almost everything on your shopping list. “Over the years, we have made organic foods more accessible by expanding O Organics to every aisle across our stores, making it possible for health and budget-conscious families to incorporate organic food into every meal,” Jennifer Saenz, EVP and Chief Merchandising Officer at Albertsons, one of many stores where you can find O Organics products, said in a statement.

O Organics now offers over 1500 items, from dairy products such as eggs and milk to packaged meats and breakfast staples such as cereal bars, granola and oatmeal. You can also enjoy affordable organic produce with O Organics’ fresh salads and fruit.

Everybody wants to make the world a better place. With O Organics, you can feed your family healthy, organic food every time you go to the market while paying it forward by contributing to the company’s efforts to end food insecurity nationwide. That’s a small, daily gesture that can amount to incredible change.

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Man unexpectedly dies during brain scan. What scientists saw should give everyone comfort.

They may have uncovered the secrets of our final moments.

via Canva

A doctor is analyzing brain scans.

Death remains one of the greatest mysteries of life. It’s impossible to know what happens as a person passes and whether there’s anything afterward because no one has ever been able to report what happens from beyond the grave. Of course, if you ask those with a keen interest in the supernatural, they may say otherwise.

However, in 2021, researcher Dr. Raul Vicente and his colleagues at the University of Tartu, Estonia, became the first people ever to record the brainwaves of someone in the process of dying, and what they’ve come to realize should be very comforting to everyone. “We measured 900 seconds of brain activity around the time of death and set a specific focus to investigate what happened in the 30 seconds before and after the heart stopped beating,” Dr. Ajmal Zemmar, a neurosurgeon at the University of Louisville, US, who organized the study, told Frontiers.


The patient who died while having his brain waves measured was 87 years old and had epilepsy. While researchers were studying his brain to learn more about the condition, they had a heart attack and passed away. “Just before and after the heart stopped working, we saw changes in a specific band of neural oscillations, so-called gamma oscillations, but also in others such as delta, theta, alpha, and beta oscillations,” Zemmar said.

The different types of brain oscillations that occurred in the patient before and after the heart attack were associated with high cognitive functions, including dreaming, concentrating, memory retrieval, and memory flashbacks. Therefore, it’s possible that as the patient was dying, they had their life flash before their eyes. What an amazing and comforting experience right before leaving this mortal coil.

“Through generating oscillations involved in memory retrieval, the brain may be playing a last recall of important life events just before we die, similar to the ones reported in near-death experiences,” Zemmar speculated. “These findings challenge our understanding of when exactly life ends and generate important subsequent questions, such as those related to the timing of organ donation.”


How long are people conscious after they are technically dead?

Science has found that people can remain conscious up to 20 seconds after they are declared dead. Even after the heart and breathing have stopped, the cerebral cortex can hang on for a while without oxygen. So, some people may experience the moment when they hear themselves declared dead, but they aren’t able to move or react to the news. In cases where someone performs CPR on the deceased person, the blood pumped by the compressions can temporarily keep the brain alive as well.

Although the experience of death will probably always remain a mystery, we should take solace in the idea that, in many cases, it may not necessarily be a miserable experience but an ecstatic final burst of consciousness that welcomes us into the great beyond. “Something we may learn from this research is: although our loved ones have their eyes closed and are ready to leave us to rest, their brains may be replaying some of the nicest moments they experienced in their lives,” Zemmar concludes.

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Women are sharing quirky things they do to make life more whimsical and it's pure delight

"I kiss my cat on both cheeks then she kisses me on both cheeks then I explain 'she's European' to no one."

Photo credit: Canva

We all could use a little whimsy in our lives.

One of the funniest things about being human is the unique quirks each one of us has that other people don't know about. In some sense, our individual oddities are things that unite us even though they are hidden from public view. It's a simple, universal truth that we're all a bit silly in our own way.

Case in point: A trend in which women share the quirky little things they do to make life more whimsical. The conversation has been circulating on social media since someone asked, "Girlies: What are some things you do to be more whimsical? I love knowing about cute little habits." And the responses, "like a magical, much-needed hug," are filling people with joy.

The question asked for women to weigh in, but there's no indication that men don't also have funny private habits as well, so we can all see ourselves in these responses.

Check out this list of people's quirky whimsical habits

"I wear matching pajamas every time I change my sheets so I can have what I call fancy sleep."

"I hold 'office hours' every Tuesday at a local coffee shop, which means I sit on the couch and order drinks for 4-5 hours while various friends and acquaintances visit me to yap abt books and gossip."

"I say, 'my lady,' every time I walk by a mirror."

"I teach the dog how to do things either to make them more interesting for me ('Let me show you how to start a load of laundry') or just to make him feel included ('Do you remember how to make coffee or should I walk you through it again? I know it's hard to remember since you can't practice without thumbs.')"

"I kiss my cat on both cheeks then she kisses me on both cheeks then I explain 'she's European' to no one."

"I tell my dishes it's bath time."

"I sleep in vintage nightgowns, it makes me feel like an 1800s princess✨"

"If I want to have negative thoughts about myself I have to think them in a cockney accent."


@abigail.bailey0

i’ve been home sick d: #whimsical #alternative #weird #tips #trinkets #habits #odd #corecore

"I say, 'May I take your coats?' when I'm peeling garlic."

"Every time I see the moon, I shout 'Hey gurrrl! Looking amazing, you are glowing!' and just compliment the hell out of her because she’s my bestie."

"I like drinking water at night ouf of small wooden bowls. It makes me feel like I'm being nursed back to health by spirits."

"I shout 'NO, not YOU! I don’t even know you!' in the voice of Lilly Moscocvitz when I’m looking for something and find something else unrelated."

"I hot glued a bow tie onto the Roomba and we call him Jeffrey."

"I tell my hamster not to answer the door for anyone before I leave."

"I call putting on pj's 'time to pump up the jams.'"

Giphy

"I always set my alarm clock to weird times like 8:52 am or 4:47pm because I don’t want less used numbers to be lonely or sad."

"Sometimes, a couple hours before bed, I go in my room and turn down the bed, spray a bit of lavender, maybe light a candle, put my water with lemon on my bedside table. Then when I get ready to go to bed a couple hours later I walk in and say 'I love turndown service!' as though it’s a pleasant surprise."

"Any time I make a mistake at work I giggle to myself, apologize, and say 'it’s my first day.' I’ve worked for the same company for 5 and a half years."

"I call my to do list my TA DA list and do jazz hands as I tick things off."

"For my own amusement I say 'officers!' and nod when I see pigeons."

"This one is kinda niche, but I’m a hairstylist. Whenever I wash my clients hair, as I give them a head massage with the conditioner I send loving thoughts into the universe over whatever is going on in their life."

"Whenever I buy something online and it asks 'is this a gift?' I write a little gift message to myself, usually along the lines of 'you are awesome and deserve these little treats.'"


Treat Yourself Donna Meagle GIF by Parks and RecreationGiphy

There are soooo many more, and each one is more delightful than the last. Turns out a whole bunch of us are a whole lot goofier in our private lives than we let on, which is a wonderful discovery.

Can whimsy actually be useful?

But there's more to this trend than simply a love of whimsy. As one commenter pointed out, "There are literal therapeutic reframing techniques in here that are FANTASTIC." It's true. Making a boring or mundane task more fun or interesting can be helpful for people who are prone to procrastination. Changing the voice you use when negative thoughts creep in can help distance that voice from your inner self. Pampering yourself by making bedtime special can create positive associations with rest and sleep, making it easier for you to settle in at night.

Perhaps our penchant for fun and whimsy isn't as frivolous as it might first appear, so if you do things like this, give yourself a pat on the back for engaging in good self-care. And now you know for sure that you're definitely not alone.


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Mom leaves a 'heartbreaking' gift to flight passengers sitting next to her baby

"That's a mom trying so hard."

@callmebelly/TikTok

An excellent reminder to show kindness and patience.

Listening to a baby cry during a flight might be aggravating, but it’s nothing compared to the moans, groans, and eyerolls that the baby's parents must endure from other passengers when it happens. No matter what tips and tricks are used to try to soothe a little one’s temperament while 30,000 miles in the air, crying is almost inevitable. So, while having to ease their own child’s anxiety, moms and dads also must suffer being the pariah of the trip. What a nightmare.

Recently, one mom was apparently trying so hard to avoid upsetting her fellow flight members that she went above and beyond to essentially apologize ahead of time if her baby began to cry on its first flight. It was a gesture that, while thoughtful, had folks really feeling for how stressed that poor mom must be.

In a clip posted to his TikTok, one of the passengers—Elliot—explained that the mom handed out small care packages to those nearby.

“She’s already so busy and took the time to make these bags for everyone,” Elliot said, before panning the camera to reveal a Ziplock bag full of candy, along with a note that made him “want to cry.”

The note read: “It’s my first flight. I made a deal to be on my best behaviour—but I can’t make any guarantees. I might cry if I get scared or if my ears start to hurt. Here are some treats to make your flight enjoyable. Thank you for being patient with us. Have a great flight.”

@callmebelly♬ BIRDS OF A FEATHER - Billie Eilish

Like Elliot, those who watched the video felt some ambivalence at the well intentioned act. Many felt remorse that she would feel the need to appease people in this way.

“This is so sweet but also … kind of breaks my heart that we live in a world in which parents feel the need to do that.”

“Because jerk people have shamed parents into believing that they need to apologize for their kids' absolutely normal behavior. What a gem of a mom.”

“You know that sweet mom worried about this trip so much.”

“That poor mom probably spent nights awake … nervous about that flight, thinking of ways to keep strangers happy.”

"That's a mom trying so hard."

Many rallied behind the mom, arguing that making others feel more comfortable with her child being on board was in no way her responsibility.

“No mom should be apologizing. Adults can control their emotions … babies not …. Hugging this mom from a distance.”

“Dear new parents: no you don’t have to do this. Your babies have the right to exist. We all know babies cry. We know you try your best.”

Luckily, there are just as many stories of fellow passengers being completely compassionate towards parents with small children—from simply choosing to throw on their headphones during a tantrum (instead of throwing one themselves) to going out of their way to comfort a baby (and taking the load of a parent in the process). These little acts of kindness make more of an impact than we probably realize. Perhaps if we incorporated more of this “it takes a village” mindset, flying could be a little bit more pleasant for everyone involved.

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In 2006, the Oscars secretly pressured Heath Ledger to make fun of gay people. He wasn't having it.

Jake Gyllenhaal shared the story of his late Brokeback Mountain co-star's kindness.

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Fájl:Heath Ledger.jpg – Wikipédia

Heath Ledger stayed true to his convictions. He stood up for what he believed in, and it didn't matter if it was in a casual conversation with a friend, on a press junket, or at the Oscars. In a resurfaced video making the rounds, Heath was on the Brokeback Mountain press tour and was asked by an interviewer, "How do you respond to people who suggest this is disgusting?"

Heath seems initially taken aback by the question. He ponders for a moment and then says, "Well, I think it's immature, for one. I think it's an incredible shame that people go out of their way to voice their disgust or negative opinions about the way two people wish to love one another."

- YouTubewww.youtube.com


He then expresses how some might be focusing on the wrong things. "At least voice your opinions on how two people share hate and violence and anger towards each other. Isn't that more important? I think so."

Brokeback Mountain is a 2005 film starring Ledger alongside Jake Gyllenhaal, about two sheep herders in Wyoming who find love with one another. It was adapted from a short story by Annie Proulx, originally published in The New Yorker in 1997.

mountain GIFGiphy

In discussing the movie itself (which won three Academy Awards in 2006, including Best Director for Ang Lee, Best Adapted Screenplay, and Best Original Score), Heath explained, "It's obviously about two men in love. It's gay-themed and easily labeled. The pure fact of it is, it transcends labels. It's the story of two human beings—two souls who are in love."

He truly wanted to make sure that audiences (including the press) understood the entire point of the film. "We're showing that love between two men is just as infectious and emotional and strong and pure as it is with heterosexual love."

While this clip has popped up many times over the years, an interview with Jake Gyllenhaal in 2020 definitively confirmed how important these themes were to Heath. In an interview with Another Man magazine, he discusses how the whole production came together. “There are things you’re chosen for—a quality, an essence—and Ang did that. And it’s still a mystery to me. And something that Heath and I shared: that it was a mystery to us at the time.”

Jake emphasized that Heath put his foot down when some writers of the Oscars telecast wanted to make light of Brokeback Mountain. "I mean, I remember they wanted to do an opening for the Academy Awards that year that was sort of joking about it. And Heath refused. I was sort of at the time, 'Oh, okay... Whatever.' I'm always like, 'It's all in good fun.' And Heath said, 'It's not a joke to me. I don't want to make any jokes about it.'"

According to WION News, Jake reminisced, "That's the thing I loved about Heath. He would never joke. Someone wanted to make a joke about the story or whatever, he was like, 'No. This is about love. Like, that's it, man.'"

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Small talk going nowhere? Expert's 'threading' technique is the key to great conversations.

It doesn't take much to be great at small talk.

via Canva

A man and woman having a conversation.

Small talk can feel awkward, especially when talking to someone you don’t know very well and run out of things to say. That awkward silence may only last a few seconds but can feel like an eternity. Small talk can be uncomfortable, but it’s the gateway to starting relationships, creating professional opportunities, and building self-confidence. Becoming a master of small talk opens up possibilities, but how do you improve your skills?

One way to elevate your small talk game is by using a technique known as conversational threading. Adding a few more details to your questions and responses can open up different avenues to take the conversation and prevent it from stalling after a question or two. The key is to be an active listener with intentional questions.

How to get better at small talk

“The problem with most small talk is that it’s happening on autopilot, which means that people are asking questions they can already predict the answers to, such as: ‘How are you?’ ‘How’s the weather?’ “How was your weekend?’” Lorraine Lee, an award-winning virtual keynote speaker and CEO of RISE Learning Solutions, told CNBC Make It. The problem is that when you ask autopilot questions, you’re bound to get predictable answers, making it hard for the conversation to get off the ground.

Question: “How are you doing?”

Predictable answer: “Fine, how are you?”

Good answer: “Great, I’m planning a trip to Mexico, and I’ve really been enjoying ‘The White Lotus’ on Max."


The “good answer” here gives the person you’re talking to two threads to follow. They can ask you about Mexico or share how they once went to Cancun and had a great time. They can also reply to your thread about “The White Lotus” and discuss whether they have seen it.

Question: “Cold outside, isn’t it?”

Predictable answer: “Yeah, I’m freezing.”

Good answer: “It reminds me of the blizzard we had a few years back. What year was that?”

The “good answer” here also gives the person you’re talking to two threads. They can speculate on the date of the blizzard or share their experience with the snowstorm. The “predictable answer” stops the conversation in its tracks.

What are subject words?

Sean Cooper, known as the “shyness and social anxiety guy,” says we should look for “subject words” when talking with people because those will provide potential threads for a more meaningful conversation. For example: “I bought tires at the Goodyear station with my wife on Saturday” has four different keywords: tires, Goodyear, wife, and Saturday.” If you’re listening, it gives you four ways to turn the conversation into something more:

Tires — “Gee, I can’t remember the last time I changed my tires…”

Goodyear — “Is that the tire store off of Crenshaw Boulevard? Do they have good service?”

Wife — “How is your wife doing these days?”

Saturday — “Saturday was a lot of fun, I took my daughter to a horse stable."

Also, you can create better threads by asking more specific questions.

Autopilot question: “Do you come here often?”

Good question: “What’s your favorite drink at this bar?”

Autopilot question: “How are you doing?”

Good question: “What’s been the highlight of the week?”

Becoming good at small talk isn’t difficult as long as you can turn off autopilot and become more intentional with your questions and answers. Be sure to load up your responses with plenty of threads and keywords so that you’re partner can choose a direction for the conversation. As long as you keep threading the conversation, your relationship has room to grow and flourish.

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