upworthy
Parenting

Father takes daughter's bullying victim on a shopping trip to teach her a lesson

When Randy Smalls of South Carolina discovered that his teenage daughter was making fun of a classmate over her clothes and makeup, he took swift action.

parenting, bullying, dad advice

Randy Smalls of South Carolina

Bullying is a huge problem. According to DoSomething.org, 1 in 5 students ages 12-18 in the United States are bullied during the school year, and approximately 160,000 teens have skipped school because of bullying. So when Randy Smalls of South Carolina discovered that his teenage daughter was making fun of a classmate over her clothes and makeup, he took swift action.

Smalls instantly felt sympathy for Ryan Reese, a seventh-grader at Berkeley Middle School, having been bullied in his youth. So he took money meant for his daughter and went on a shopping spree with Ryan to get some new clothes and a makeover.

Smalls' wife and Ryan's mother Richauna Reese are friends, but they weren't aware of the bullying until recently. The families got on the phone after speaking to Ryan, and Smalls asked if he could take Ryan to buy new clothes and get a makeover at the beauty salon.

Smalls used money initially intended to buy his 13-year-old daughter some new clothes, but after learning about her bullying, he decided to spend the money on Ryan instead.

"I say, 'When you laugh along, you're co-signing the bullying," Smalls told Yahoo News.

"My daughter was upset, especially because she is into fashion," he said. "So she came with us and helped pick out Ryan's new clothes."

While his daughter was at church, Smalls took Ryan to the beauty salon and paid for twice-a-month appointments until the end of the year.

After hearing about the good gesture, local salons have also offered to keep Ryan looking stylish for the next few months.

Richauna, Ryan's mother, told Yahoo News that her daughter was struggling after the recent deaths of her father, grandfather, and aunt, as well as non-epileptic seizures caused by the stress.

The shopping trip has helped Ryan immensely. "I wasn't expecting it. I just started to cry. It (the bullying) was really sad for me because I had lost my grandpa, father, and aunt, and it really took me deep down in my depression," Ryan explained.

"This is the first time I have seen a parent take such a stance on bullying," Richauna added.

Smalls was overwhelmed by the response and says that it's helped his daughter see her mistake.

"I didn't expect for this to get big but I'm glad if other parents [can learn from it]," Smalls said. "My daughter learned her lesson."

"As parents, we have to take responsibility for what our children do," Smalls told ABC's Strahan, Sara, and Keke. "We can teach our children, but when they go and are around other children they can veer off a little bit. When situations like this happen, we have to take action and be the parent and not the friend."

And the pair seem to be getting along better for the experience. "They're cool now," Richauna said.

Watch to young girls break down the story in this adorable YouTube video:

This article originally appeared five years ago.

True

Vimbai Kapurura is the Executive Director of Women Unlimited, a grassroots women’s rights organization working to promote the rights and leadership of women, girls, and marginalized groups in Eswatini and southern Africa. With support from the Rapid Response Window of the United Nations Women’s Peace and Humanitarian Fund (WPHF), she’s advocating to have more female voices in national peace building spaces to ensure women’s rights and demands are included.

“Women are peacebuilders. We are peacemakers. We have a critical role to play in crisis situations and we are very much better placed to play a peacebuilding role in any country.”

In the face of the growing political turmoil in Eswatini, where calls for the establishment of a national dialogue remain seemingly unanswered, Vimbai and her organization are stepping up, raising their voice and bringing forward innovative solutions to promote peace and stability across the country. WPHF is supporting them to amplify women’s voices and mainstream gender perspectives into relevant decision-making mechanisms.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

“We are the cradle of life. We are changemakers, movers, shakers of any area of development. We want to be engaged and involved in any area of the value chain, the complete value chain. We want to be there.”

As part of its project with WPHF, Women Unlimited – with technical support from Cordaid, one of the INGO partners of the RRW – has trained several local women-led civil society organizations in conflict resolution, conflict prevention and mediation processes, as well as carried out educational and awareness raising campaigns on the value of women’s participation in peace processes, targeting both women and men across the country.

“WPHF has really helped us a lot. Not only has the funding allowed us to engage more women in peacebuilding processes, but it’s also supported us to underscore the need for female leadership in these spaces, where we’re often left aside.”

In Eswatini, where women and girls face deep-rooted patriarchy from a very young age, undermining their confidence, autonomy and leadership, Vimbai has become an outspoken advocate for women’s equal representation in decision-making roles at all levels, from community-level and regional committees to national and global peace building spaces.

“If you gather many women toward on common goal, you are guaranteed that that goal is going to be achieved. Let us come together and be the change we want to see. No one will do it for us. But together, we can.”

A tireless leader and activist who’s influenced the lives of many women and girls in Eswatini, Vimbai is a firm believer in women’s capacity, tenacity, and adaptability to lead and drive transformative change in their communities. When she thinks about peace, she dreams about women coming together, taking up space, and walking side by side for a more peaceful and gender-equal world in which harmful stereotypes and cultural practices are left behind.

Follow, engage, and amplify the work of Vimbai's organization!

Pop Culture

Fans applaud Sabrina Carpenter's sweet response to a joke Dolly Parton made about aging

“If we treated older women like this more often maybe younger women would be less petrified of aging."

Kristopher Harris/Wikipedia,Condé Nast/Wikipedia

Dolly Parton (left) Sabrina Carpenter (right)

Fans are applauding Sabrina Carpenter for the incredibly sweet moment she shared with one of her biggest idols—the one and only Dolly Parton. The two were recently out promoting a new duet version of Carpenter’s “Please Please Please,” which appeared on her new Short n’ Sweet album, when Parton made an innocent (yet all too familiar feeling) self-deprecating joke about aging.

As the two posed for the cameras, Parton referred to them as “befores and afters,” before quipping “You’ll be this old one day,” to Carpenter. Parton was obviously being lighthearted, but it’s hard not to feel a twinge of sadness when you really think about it. Because, generally speaking, growing older has been something women have been made to fear for, well, their entire lives. So “you’ll be this old one day” almost comes across as an ominous warning, even though that was not really the intention. And you half expect Carpenter to shudder in utter terror at the thought of it all.

But instead, Carpenter quickly replied, “I know, I can’t wait! I hope I look like you,” with such genuine enthusiasm, it really shook people. The complete absence of fear seemed to reflect a refreshing shift from previous attitudes about aging, and viewers took note of its significance.

One person even likened Carpenter to Greta Gerwig’s Barbie, referring to the iconic acne where the titular doll calls an older woman “beautiful.”


By and large, folks hoped that older generations of women would adopt this newfound perspective of celebrating their age rather than bemoaning it. As one person wrote on X, “This is so important to tell older women. I never let older ladies talk down on themselves near me, it breaks my heart how they don’t see their beauty just because of their age.”

And sure, as some pointed out, Parton—with her virtually unlimited access to cosmetic procedures—might not be the prime example of wholeheartedly welcoming aging. But we’re not even really talking about her POV in this scenario anyway. It’s Carpenter’s sincere adoration that’s impactful.

As one person tweeted, “If we treated older women like this more often maybe younger women would be less petrified of aging,” which really hit the nail on the head.

And clearly, judging by other posts, folks share similar sentiments.

“I want more of us to welcome aging like this instead of shunning it and pretending it’s the worst thing that’s going to happen,” one person shared. Another said, “It truly is a privilege to live such a long and fruitful life, I hope more people express this sentiment so younger girls can start to feel this way too.”

It would be naive to think that societal standards have done a complete about face. After all, youth-enhancing cosmetic procedures are on the rise, even for those as young as 20-years-old. But even still, the fact that we are seeing more women, both young and old, tear down this outdated societal mindset shows progress is still being made. And all progress is worth celebrating.

via Meg Sullivan (used with permission) and Canva/Photos

A volunteer hands out food in a food bank and Meg Sullivan shares her dad's kind gesture.

When we consider people who have had a positive impact on the world, we often think of those who have made grand gestures to improve the lives of others, such as Martin Luther King, Jr., Greta Thunberg, or Mahatma Gandhi. Unfortunately, that type of effort is out of reach for the average person.

However, O Organics would like to remind everyone that they can positively impact the world through small, consistent acts of kindness that add up over time. Much like how a small creek can create a valley over the years, we can change lives through small, consistent acts of kindness.

O Organics is dedicated to the well-being of all by nourishing people everywhere with delicious organic foods grown by producers who meet USDA-certified organic farming standards.

Upworthy's Instagram page recently posted a touching example of everyday kindness. Meg Sullivan shared how her father, Tom, peeled oranges for her lunch just about every day from kindergarten through high school. But on the final day of her senior year of high school, he sent his 17-year-old daughter unpeeled oranges with a touching note about how she’d have to start peeling them for herself.



“It’s Time Baby Girl,” he wrote on a wikiHow printout on how to peel an orange with a drawing of himself crying. For the father, this daily ritual was about more than just making lunch; it was about showing that he cared by going the extra mile. “I could have put money on her lunch account,” Tom told Today.com. “But it’s one of those little things I thought was important, that she knows somebody’s taking the time to take care of her.”

The small, daily gesture taught Megan an essential lesson in kindness.

The post reminded people how their fathers’ small acts of kindness meant so much to them. “My dad peeled my oranges until I graduated high school, too. Now, I peel my daughter’s oranges and will for the next 7 plus years,” Katie wrote in the comments. “Love this. My dad peeled mine, too. When I moved out, he gave me an orange peeler gadget,” Mary added.

o organics, albertson's giving backO Organics has a wide array of foods and flavors covering almost everything on your shopping list.via Albertson's

Did you know that every time you go to the supermarket, you can also change the world through small gestures? O Organics not only allows you to feed your family delicious and nutritious organic food, but each purchase also gives back to help people and communities facing food insecurity.

Through contributions from customers like you, O Organics donates up to 28 million meals annually. The company’s contribution is essential when, according to the USDA, 47.4 million Americans live in food-insecure households.

O Organics has a wide array of foods and flavors covering almost everything on your shopping list. “Over the years, we have made organic foods more accessible by expanding O Organics to every aisle across our stores, making it possible for health and budget-conscious families to incorporate organic food into every meal,” Jennifer Saenz, EVP and Chief Merchandising Officer at Albertsons, one of many stores where you can find O Organics products, said in a statement.

O Organics now offers over 1500 items, from dairy products such as eggs and milk to packaged meats and breakfast staples such as cereal bars, granola and oatmeal. You can also enjoy affordable organic produce with O Organics’ fresh salads and fruit.

Everybody wants to make the world a better place. With O Organics, you can feed your family healthy, organic food every time you go to the market while paying it forward by contributing to the company’s efforts to end food insecurity nationwide. That’s a small, daily gesture that can amount to incredible change.

Unsplash & Canva Photos

It's not a phase.

One of the best lessons you can teach your kids is that they have the right to be who they are and who they want to be. One of the best ways to teach that lesson is to embody it yourself. Kids need your presence and your wisdom, but they also need your example. Be your truest self! Chase your dreams! Live without fear! It's the best possible way to show them that they can do it, too.

However, like all things in parenting, this lesson doesn't come without its own caveats. What if you embracing your truest self is, like, totally embarrassing? What if it causes other kids to bully your children, or gets them banned from playdates? That doesn't mean it's right for people to judge you, but it will probably happen if you're a loud or controversial dresser. As a parent, what are you going to do about it?

One dad recently found himself facing a conundrum: As a self-described "goth," and a larger guy to boot, he began to wonder if his unique style of dress might be having a negative impact on his kids.

"I'm a father of a 2 year old and 6 year old," the man wrote in a post on r/Daddit. "I dress like a [punk]/goth. It's nothing insanely extreme, just a lotta skulls and arm bands, couple chains on legs, rings. Stuff like that. ... I'm a rather large guy, 6' 7", so I already stand out."

gif of a man in white and black goth makeupGoths tend to stand out. Giphy

He says due to his size and dress, he's more than a little used to getting looks everywhere he goes. But then the dad of two recalls an incident at the playground that had him rethinking everything.

"Today at the park, I don't know, it felt like this lady was afraid of me? I keep to myself, smile a lot because I know I'm intimidating, and actively play with my kids, so I think it's kind of strange. After playing a while my daughter comes up crying. I ask her what's wrong, and she tells me 'my friend's mom said I can't play with you.' I look over and it's that same lady and she hurries and looks away.

"Later on, I'm holding my 2 year olds hand, walking him to the swings, and I overhear another kid ... go, 'ooh stay away from that guy. Stay away. My mom says he's bad'"

The user than asked the dad community for advice: Should he tone it down for his kids' sake? Ditch the skulls and chains to help them fit in and make friends more easily? Or would that be setting the wrong example?

The community was split on whether this dad should stop dressing goth. Great arguments emerged on both sides of a terrific debate.

Lots of parents encouraged the OP to stay true to himself, as the long-term lesson he'd be teaching his kids would be worth a little short-term discomfort.

goth teen walking through school halls and flipping his hairWhat's the price of staying true to you?Giphy

"Please never change your style. As your kids and your kids friends get older, you're going to be the 'cool dad.' Also, please consider the message you'd be sending to your children in changing yourself and being less authentic for the sake of making other people feel comfortable. It's not a healthy message to send."

"No you should model the behavior you want to see -- positive self expression, acceptance of differences, and kindness."

Others felt it was selfish of OP to continue dressing and behaving the same way he did before he was a father.

"It's not about you anymore, it's about your kids and the children they will interact with."

"OP should do what he feels is right, but those choices come with consequences. Personally, I can't imagine being so tied to how I dress that I would keep dressing that way even if caused distress for my daughter. Like, for what? They're just clothes. ... I get that some people are really attached to how they dress, like it's part of their identity. I can't personally relate, and fundamentally don't believe that how I dress defines who I am."

"I'm gonna be honest with you, and with love as a metalhead, that's kinda cringe my dude. Your clothes don't define you, and it sounds like your choice to dress like not-a-dad is going to force your kids to be outcasts. It's fine for us to be weirdo outcasts, we're adults, but you live in Mormon country and your kids don't get to choose who they see day to day at school. I dunno, swallow your pride, tone it down."

Some challenged this dad to dig deep. Was punk or goth clothing really essential to his identity? Or was it just something he was used to, or maybe something he used as a shield in social situations? These are big and important questions to answer before you decide if the way you dress is something you're willing to sacrifice. Others still suggested this dad find some kind of a compromise:

"Yeah I think finding a compromise is the best way forward, you can still be yourself but are also not scaring others around you (as unwarranted as it might be). And, remember you don’t always have to cut back. Probably 80% of the time you’re fine as you usually are, like at kids birthdays or something when you can get to know people etc. But if you’re gonna be around and potentially interacting with strangers’ children, it’s probably good to tone it down just a bit, just for your kids sake if anything."

Experts agree that when it comes to personal identity preferences that might embarrass your kids, compromise is key.

Rather than inflexibly insisting on "fully expressing yourself at all times," you may have to pick and choose a little more when you become a parent.

"It's important to maintain your authentic styles for most occasions. But the dad could think about toning it down in certain circumstances like school functions or when meeting new parents. That's because the focus is on the kid, about the kid, rather than himself," says Cory Reid-Vanas, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist at Rocky Mountain Counseling Collective. Reid-Vanas adds that kids often don't want to stand out, so extra attention may make them feel embarrassed. Though, these moments of conflict make for good conversation and teaching moments.

Ciara Bogdanovic, Licensed Psychotherapist at Sagebrush Psychotherapy,, says: "More important than how the parent dresses is their social relationships and how they handle situations. Children model their behavior after their parents. So it is important to model healthy friendships and how to deal with difficult social situations like rejection. Is the parent showing appropriate social skills on the playground? For example, is the parent greeting people and making friendly conversation?" In other words, a little extra smiling and proactive friendly behavior might help disarm judgmental bystanders.

Whatever the right answer is, the fact that this father is grappling with it so heavily said a lot about the love he has for his kids. In the very long run, that is definitely what they'll end up remembering most about him.

Innovation

For the first time ever, a 13-year-old boy has been cured of a deadly brain cancer

The boy’s tumor disappeared after participating in a new clinical trial.

Lucas Jemeljanova, then aged 5, with his parents and sister a year before he was diagnosed with DIPG. (via Facebook)

Lucas Jemeljanova poses with his family a year before being diagnosed with cancer (Facebook)

Few things strike fear in the heart of parents and doctors more than a cancer called diffuse intrinsic pontine glioma, or DIPG. Primarily found in children, DIPG is a highly aggressive brain tumor that is uniformly fatal, with less than 10 percent of children surviving longer than two years after diagnosis.

But for the first time ever, a 13-year-old boy from Belgium named Lucas Jemeljanova has beaten the odds. Diagnosed with DIPG at age six, Lucas’ doctor Jacques Grill told Lucas’ parents, Cedric and Olesja, that he was unlikely to live very long. Instead of giving up hope, Cedric and Olesja flew Lucas to France to participate in a clinical trial called BIOMEDE, which tested new potential drugs against DIPG.

Lucas was randomly assigned everolimus in the clinical trial, a chemotherapy drug that works by blocking a protein called mTOR. mTOR helps cancer cells divide and grow new blood vessels, while everolimus decreases blood supply to the tumor cells and stops cancer cells from reproducing. Everolimus, a tablet that’s taken once per day, has been approved in the UK and the US to treat cancers in the breast, kidneys, stomach, pancreas, and others—but until the BIOMEDE clinical trial, it had never before been used to treat DIPG.

Lucas Jemeljanova poses with his motherLucas Jemeljanova poses with his mother(lesja Jemeljanova / Facebook)

Though doctors weren’t sure how Lucas would react to the medication, it quickly became clear that the results were good.

“Over a series of MRI scans, I watched as the tumor completely disappeared,” Grill said in an interview. Even more remarkably, the tumor has not returned since. Lucas, who is now thirteen, is considered officially cured of DIPG.

Even after the tumor was gone, Grill, who is the head of the Brain Tumor Program in the Department of Child and Teenage Oncology at Gustave Roussy cancer research hospital in Paris, was reluctant to stop Lucas’ treatments. Until about a year and a half ago, Lucas was still taking everolimus once every day.

“I didn’t know when to stop, or how, because there was no other reference in the world,” Grill said.

While Lucas is the only one in the clinical trial whose tumor has completely disappeared, seven other children have been considered “long responders” to everolimus, meaning their tumors have not progressed for more than three years after starting treatment.

Lucas Jemeljanova poses with his mother to mark cancer awareness monthLucas Jemeljanova with his mother (Facebook)(lesja Jemeljanova / Facebook)

So why did everolimus work so well for Lucas? Doctors think that an extremely rare genetic mutation in Lucas’ tumor “made its cells far more sensitive to the drug,” Grill said, while the drug worked well in other children because of the “biological peculiarities” of their tumors.

While everolimus is by no means a cure, the trial has provided real hope for parents and families of children diagnosed with DIPG. Doctors must now work to better understand why Lucas’ tumor responded so well to the drug and how they can replicate those results in tumor “organoids”—artificially-grown cells that resemble an organ. After that, said Marie-Anne Debily, a researcher in the BIOMEDE trial, “the next step will be to find a drug that works as well on tumor cells.”

In the meantime, however, Lucas’ doctors are thrilled.

“Lucas’ case offers real hope,” said Debily.


Lucas Jemeljanova poses with his familyLucas Jemeljanova with his parents and sister(lesja Jemeljanova / Facebook)

This article originally appeared last year.

Joy

The 17 harsh truths about aging that people were never 'prepared' for

"How your mind stays young while your body starts to slow down."

A woman contemplating aging

Many of us feel invincible when we are young, believing we can control the aging process so that we’ll always stay forever young, as Bob Dylan once sang. But there’s a moment when everyone realizes aging is an inevitable process and that, eventually, we will have to deal with a slow decline in our physical and, quite possibly, mental capabilities.

This realization and understanding that we won’t be here forever can profoundly change one’s perspective on life. Even though aging is inevitable, studies show how we think about the process can significantly impact our longevity. People with a positive view of aging live an average of 7.5 years longer than those without.

Things happen as we age that are impossible to describe to younger people. However, a group of Redditors did an excellent job of explaining the truths about aging that they were not “prepared” for in a recent thread that made a lot of people feel seen. A user named sofiagympixie asked the AskReddit forum, “What’s a truth about aging that no one prepared you for?” and it received over 2,700 responses.

A big takeaway is that many people feel like they stop mentally aging at a certain point, usually in their late 20s. Still, the continued physical aging they experience makes them feel like they cannot relate to the person in the mirror.



Here are 17 of the most profound responses to the question: What’s a truth about aging that no one prepared you for?

1. There is an end

"You start to realize the older you get that the end is closer than the beginning and you still feel like you have so much more to do."

"That moment where you start to get a sense that there is an end."

2. It takes energy to keep everything afloat

"No one prepared me for how much energy and time it takes to maintain everything—like health, relationships, and just staying organized. It’s way more work than I expected!"

3. Mind/body detachment

"How your mind stays young while your body starts to slow down. You still feel like the same person you’ve always been, but suddenly you notice little things changing."

"This was such a surprise to me. I really expected to feel psychologically older as I aged. But physically, oh my body has betrayed me... Eyes... hair (gray, but at least I still have it)... back... knees... hips... prostate."



4. The past feels closer than it is

"When you get a flashback of a good memory and you realize that was over 10 years ago."

"When I told my daughter about something I did 24 years ago, I had to pause for a moment."

Time flies isn't just a saying. Psychologists agree that our minds lump time together based on novel experiences. When we are older, the days are a lot more similar than when we were young children. That's why when you're 80, time moves a lot faster than it did when you were 8.

5. Stuck in the wrong time

"I’m 61, and sometimes I feel like this world is not for me anymore. I feel almost like an imposter. For example, I can’t find clothes I like that fit correctly, TV is abhorrent, only old music sounds pleasant, shoes are uncomfortable, I don’t recognize most celebrities or famous people in the news or tabloids, and I don’t understand the need for most new and supposedly exciting products. I’m an educated person, I still work and have an active life. I’m not a recluse. But a little at a time, I feel the world is moving on without me. I finally understand why, in her final years, my mother only watched movies from the 1950s and reminisced about the past more than she talked about the present. Her world was long gone."



6. You lose friends

"If you choose not to have kids, you may end up losing your friends. I turn 40 this year, and my partner and I don't see many folks these days. Parents like to hang out with other parents. And I don't have a grudge, I totally see the value for playdates, etc. But it can be a little lonely."

"To be fair, I have 2 kids and lost a lot of friends because we simply don’t have the time/energy to connect regularly enough to maintain a healthy friendship. It instead falls into an awkward acquaintance stage where enough time passes between communication, and you’re not sure if reaching out to connect comes across weird."

7. Your parents are aging, too

"It's not just you who is getting old. Your parents are getting even older."

"I feel this. Lost my mom 2 weeks before my 21st birthday. 40 now with 2 kids. I get angry/sad at a lot of milestones like my wedding and kids' stuff ‘cause my mom was robbed of them, and I was robbed of her."

8. Time wasted caring about other people's opinions

"It’s so freeing when that old twinge of 'why don’t they like me' pops up, and then I remember that I can not be bothered by that anymore, and magically, I don’t care!"

"Just wasting time in general. No thanks. I want to do as many things as possible!"



9. Your friends die

"Your friends start to die. It's something I never thought about."

10. Time flies

"Man. I don’t even feel like the days are long anymore. I just keep blinking and the weeks go by."

"Yup, wake up, eat breakfast, do a couple things. Wait, it’s lunch already? Eat lunch, do a couple more things, time to prep dinner. Eat dinner, clean up, fix a few things, it’s 9 pm. I guess it’s almost time to get ready for bed? This times 10,000 for me."

11. The monotony sets in

"You will realize that you hate planning meals and making food every single day. It's boring, and it's too easy to fall into monotony. But you have to make lunch again and then plan for dinner again then make dinner again and what do you want to eat tomorrow so you plan for breakfast tomorrow and get up and make breakfast again and then plan for lunch again...."

12. You become invisible to much of society

"I wondered what felt off the last year. Gen Z is everywhere now, and I'm still asking myself when that happened."



13. Adults aren't real

"When you're a kid, you can't wait to 'grow up,' and then you do, and you're still you, just older. That voice inside your head doesn't change, but what you see in the mirror does. Only now you're just older and saddled with bills and stress and all of life's 'surprises.' On top of this, everyone is winging it. Absolutely everyone. Because the idea of order and a civilized society is an illusion. We're all playing by made up rules and making imaginary money and all the rest of it. A one-dollar bill costs just as much to print as a hundred-dollar bill."

14. Priorities change

"Things that seemed so important when you were younger, really are not important."

15. Younger people's reverence

"I'm middle-aged, and a funny thing is how younger people get self-conscious or apologize when there is no need. For example, they will apologize for swearing around me or mentioning something like (gasp) drinking, or drugs, or sleeping around. I think it's funny. Why would being on earth longer make me easier to scandalize? I've seen and done things that would shock them, lol, but to them I'm a very proper-looking classy older lady."

16. Ageism

"Doors start closing once you reach a certain age."

"Ageism is real. I just turned 50 and am in a young person's career (software development). I feel how hiring managers look at me when asked to turn my camera on, during an interview that was going very well and suddenly it's 'we'll get back to you.'"

17. It all catches up

"Things like drinking, eating unhealthily, smoking, spending ... they will catch up. When you're young you think you're different, or you think that when it does catch up you'll be old so who cares, I won't care when I'm old anyway. You will care, though. You'll still be you. Those things won't seem like an issue right up to the moment they are. And then it's too late to take them back."

This article originally appeared last year.

A woman is shocked to learn that her name means something totally different in Australia.

Devyn Hales, 22, from California, recently moved to Sydney, Australia, on a one-year working visa and quickly learned that her name wouldn’t work Down Under. It all started when a group of men made fun of her on St. Patrick’s Day.

After she introduced herself as Devyn, the men laughed at her. "They burst out laughing, and when I asked them why, they told me devon is processed lunch meat,” she told The Daily Mail. It's similar to baloney, so I introduce myself as Dev now,” she said in a viral TikTok video with over 1.7 million views.

For those who have never been to Australia, Devon is a processed meat product usually cut into slices and served on sandwiches. It is usually made up of pork, basic spices and a binder. Devon is affordable because people buy it in bulk and it’s often fed to children. Australians also enjoy eating it fried, like spam. It is also known by other names such as fritz, circle meat, Berlina and polony, depending on where one lives on the continent. It's like in America, where people refer to cola as pop, soda, or Coke, depending on where they live in the country.

So, one can easily see why a young woman wouldn’t want to refer to herself as a processed meat product that can be likened to boloney or spam. "Wow, love that for us," another woman named Devyn wrote in the comments. “Tell me the name thing isn't true,” a woman called Devon added.

@dhalesss

#fypシ #australia #americaninaustralia #sydney #aussie

Besides changing her name, Dev shared some other differences between living in Australia and her home country.

“So everyone wears slides. I feel like I'm the only one with 'thongs'—flip-flops—that have the little thing in the middle of your big toe. Everyone wears slides,” she said. Everyone wears shorts that go down to your knees and that's a big thing here.”

Dev also noted that there are a lot of guys in Australia named Lachlan, Felix and Jack.

She was also thrown off by the sound of the plentiful magpies in Australia. According to Dev, they sound a lot like crying children with throat infections. “The birds threw me off,” she said before making an impression that many people in the comments thought was close to perfect. "The birds is so spot on," Jess wrote. "The birds, I will truly never get used to it," Marissa added.

One issue that many Americans face when moving to Australia is that it is more expensive than the United States. However, many Americans who move to Australia love the work-life balance. Brooke Laven, a brand strategist in the fitness industry who moved there from the U.S., says that Aussies have the “perfect work-life balance” and that they are “hard-working” but “know where to draw the line.”

Despite the initial cultural shocks, Devyn is embracing her new life in Australia with a positive outlook. “The coffee is a lot better in Australia, too,” she added with a smile, inspiring others to see the bright side of cultural differences.


This article originally appeared last year.