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Caring for older loved ones around the holidays? These 11 tips may help.

Helping the ones you love can go hand-in-hand with holiday cheer.

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AARP + the Ad Council

The holidays are right around the corner, and for many that means reuniting with family.

It's the perfect time to connect over delicious home-baked pies, laugh during competitive charades, and just generally spread good cheer to one another.

Via istock.

However, many older loved ones may not be able to participate in the holiday fun as easily as they once could.

Going up and down stairs may be more difficult now, and they might not be able to remember everyone they want to give gifts to. Or maybe they can no longer drive, which means getting to a particular destination on their own could be tough. Maybe they avoid going to a family gathering altogether because it just feels too hard.  

And if your loved one hasn't asked for help directly, it can be tough figuring out how to jump in and offer.

If you're just learning that they're developing limitations, the holidays are perhaps the best time to broach the conversation about their current or future care needs. There’s no better moment to make those extra efforts for the people you love.

Here are 11 things you can do around the holidays for your loved ones who might not know they need help.

1. Have a pre-holiday gathering to develop a caregiving plan.

Before your family get-together, touch base with everyone to make a plan about how everyone can best support your older loved one during the holidays; that way you can be sure they aren't left out of the festivities. Who will be picking up mom to bring her to dinner? Who's taking her shopping? Is someone shoveling her snow? Remember that caregiving doesn't need to be a solo effort.

2. Offer to take them holiday shopping.

Image via iStock.

If you've noticed they've had trouble driving lately, you can suggest taking them holiday shopping. After all, you're already going. Plus, it's a fun and meaningful way for you two to spend time together.

3. Bring gifts and family to them.

This is especially helpful if your older loved can't easily leave the house. If that's the case, why not arrange the holiday gathering plans around them so they can still be a part of the action? They can enjoy gifts, food, and fun all from the comfort of their home.

4. Use after-dinner time to maybe start a conversation about next steps.

The kids will likely be off playing, so it's an ideal time to bring up the subject of how you can be helpful to your older loved one. You don't want to ambush them, but the end of the year is a great time to touch base and ask your loved one how they feel the year has gone and what kind of care and support they might need in the new year.

As AARP's Prepare to Care Guide states, "a plan should never be made without the participation, knowledge, and consent of your loved one." By taking an opportunity to begin talking about it over dessert by the fireplace, it'll hopefully feel more like an open-ended conversation.

That said, if the timing doesn't feel right, you shouldn't force the issue. AARP's family caregiving expert Amy Goyer says you might use the holidays as a kick off point to schedule the conversation for a later date when everyone can feel up to speed and on the same page.

5. Help them feel included in the holiday festivities.

via istock.

For older loved ones with Alzheimer's or other memory loss issues, it's easy to just fade into the background, especially if they don't remember past holiday traditions. But the important thing to remember is that holidays are about being together, and no one should be left out. That's why AARP's family caregiving expert Amy Goyer stresses the importance of encouraging them to get involved in any way they want. From singing carols to decorating the Christmas tree, it's the little things that may spark some unexpected joy.

"Understand what’s meaningful for them," says Goyer. "Think about how you can adapt those things to fit their abilities."

6. Make them a unique holiday gift that will remind them how much they mean to you.

Maybe it's a scrapbook filled with photos of your family from past holidays that they can always flip through to remember wonderful moments. Or, perhaps it's a watch or necklace you had engraved. Gifts with a real personal touch are a constant reminder that they have family who loves them.

7. Ask them what fun activities they want to do during the holidays.

This is both a way for you to spend more time with your older loved one and make sure they're going out and doing things. List items could include visiting an obscure museum to something as simple as taking the afternoon to learn a cool new game. As loved ones age, they can begin to feel like they're losing their independence. Giving them the chance to decide what you'll do together can be a fun and empowering experience.

"It’s okay to create new traditions," stresses Goyer.

8. Encourage kids in the family to interview their elders.

Image via iStock.

Considering everyone has a recording device on their phones these days, this is an easy and fun thing to do before or after a holiday meal. Not only does it strengthen the bond between the generations, it also makes your older loved ones feel like their stories still matter. And at the end of it, you'll have their memories captured on tape to cherish for years to come.

9. Take a day or two and just focus on yourself.

This may sound counterintuitive to the season of giving, but if you've been dedicating a lot of time and effort to working out a caregiving plan, you may be burned out. If you don't take some time to recharge, you won't be useful to your older loved ones — or anyone for that matter. Finding that balance between caring for yourself and others is vital to keeping the care going.

10. Look at the holidays as a chance to test out new living situations.

Via Jennifer Martin/AARP.

If it seems like your older loved one can no longer live alone but isn't eager to change up their lifestyle, why not suggest they stay with you or a fellow family member over the holidays? It's an easy way to test out the new situation under ideal, aka celebratory, circumstances.

11. If you live far from your older loved one, figure out how you can help from a distance.

Image via iStock.

You may not be able to be the caregiver on the ground all year long, but that doesn't mean you can't do a lot for them. If you're going to be a point person for care but can't physically be there, make sure you have a local team of support lined up. Whether they're family, friends, or hired help, it's important to know someone can get to your loved one quickly and easily in an emergency.

The transition into caregiving can be difficult, but getting the ball rolling over the holidays might just make it a little easier.

And no matter what steps you choose to take, be sure to keep listening to your loved one throughout. They're a huge part of this new step, and their voice should always matter.

Of course, everyone's situation will be unique, but if you approach the adjustment thoughtfully and with love, it can make all the difference.

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Education

Sweden makes stunning decision to trademark its name to avoid confusion

The country is taking historic steps to fix the problem.

via Visit Sweden (used with permission)

A Swedish woman taking things into her own hands.

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Sweden has existed for over 1,000 years, but travelers across the globe are confused because other places, inspired by the country’s untouched beauty and joyously inclusive culture, have taken its name.

Seven other places in the world call themselves Sweden, so to distinguish itself from the name-alikes, the Kingdom of Sweden is taking a bold, historic step that no country has before. It’s become the first to apply to trademark its name with the European Union Intellectual Property Office.

Visit Sweden likens the country’s problem to a luxury brand that has to contend with dupes, knockoffs, or bootlegs that fall short of the glory of the genuine article.

“It’s flattering that other places want to be called Sweden, but let’s be honest, there should only be one. Our Sweden. The one with the Northern Lights, endless forests, and the world’s best flat-pack furniture,” says Susanne Andersson, CEO at Visit Sweden.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

By trademarking its name, Sweden will make things much less confusing for travelers worldwide. It’d be a shame for someone looking to visit Sweden’s majestic Lapland to mistakenly wind up in a place with no reindeer, Aurora Borealis, or cloudberries to be found.

The world-class research team at Visit Sweden knew it had to act when it realized that other destinations with the same name had tripped up travelers. People looking to vacation in Portland, Oregon, have accidentally wound up in Portland, Maine. Travelers yearning to experience the fall in Manchester, New Hampshire, have been deplaning in Manchester, England. “It happens more than you think!” the researchers admitted.


sweden, visit sweden, swedish vacation The Northern Lights in Sweden. via Visit Sweden, Photographer: Jann Lipka/imagebank.sweden.se

The E.U. Intellectual Property Office must act swiftly and allow Sweden to trademark its name so that travelers worldwide don’t miss the opportunity to experience an utterly unique country known for its serene landscapes, commitment to deep relaxation and personal freedom.

No one should ever miss out on staying on one of Sweden’s 267,570 islands, more than any other country. The Swedish archipelagos offer luxurious glamping, peaceful hikes, tranquil solitude and awe-inspiring, pristine nature.

sweden, visit sweden, swedish vacation A woman camping in the Swedish archipelago.via Visit Sweden, Photographer: Anders Klapp/imagebank.sweden.se


Sweden is a beautiful place to visit all year round, with bright summers, colorful falls, vibrant springs and dark, crisp winters. It is also a place to delight your tastebuds with a cuisine centered on healthy, locally sourced produce, with some preparation methods dating back to the Viking era.

The original Sweden is a place where one can relish Old World European history while also enjoying the modern pleasures of the most progressive countries in the world. Travelers can be whisked back into history by visiting the Naval Port of Karlskona, a well-preserved European naval town from 1680. Or, enjoy cutting-edge design, delicacies, art, music and culture in hip metropolitan destinations such as Stockholm or Sweden’s “coolest city,” Gothenburg.

Did we mention Sweden has an ABBA museum? Wait till the other 7 Swedens find out about that.

As you can see, Sweden is an incredibly unique destination that cannot be duplicated. It would be a tragedy for anyone intending to visit the original Sweden to mistakenly find themselves in a name-alike place that lacks its Scandinavian charm. You can do your part to stop the confusion by signing a petition to let Sweden trademark Sweden at Visit Sweden (the original).

sweden, visit sweden, swedish vacation A Swedish Midsommar celebration. via Visit Sweden, Photographer: Stefan Berg/Folio/imagebank.sweden.se

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Joy

A toddler kept tapping a woman's arm on a plane. Her response holds a lesson for us all.

"These are the types of people we need on airplanes."

@Cosmic-Chen/Reddit

What do you do when a little hand comes out of nowhere to feel your arm?

Being locked in a metal box with 150 random people all hurtling through the air at 30,000 feet is quite the social experiment, but one many of us do willingly in this age of air travel. One of the most notable parts of that experiment is that you never know who's going to sit near you on an airplane. Will you get the quiet reader? The Chatty Cathy? The cougher who doesn't cover their mouth? The sweet-but-over-perfumed old lady? The parent with a baby who screams from takeoff to landing?

Flying can feel like a game of roulette, especially when you find yourself sitting near one of the most unpredictable forces on Earth—a toddler. Tiny tots might can for the most delightful trip ever or the most annoying one, but as one couple demonstrates, the difference sometimes comes down to our own attitude.

A video shared on Reddit reads, "We were on the plane when this baby's hand kept reaching out and touching my arm from behind…" At first, we see a zoomed in shot of a woman's next to the window as a little hand reaches around the side of her seat and taps her on the back of the arm, repeatedly and enthusiastically. Then the camera pants to the woman's face and the face of the man with her, and their expressions say it all.

Clearly, the child is enjoying the feel of the woman's skin on the back of her arm. Tap tap tap, rub rub, squeeze, tap tap. No hesitation, zero sense of decorum, just a totally oblivious toddler sensory experience. A little annoying? Probably. Pure and wholesome and worthy of a laugh? Absolutely.

This woman could have asked the parent to stop their child from touching her (and she may have eventually). Not everyone finds small children cute and some people have sensory issues of their own that make such encounters more bothersome than it would be for others. But assuming the toddler arm massage was temporary and that the parents saw what was happening and stopped it, the reaction of the couple is a perfect example of finding the joy in life and rolling with the punches.

As the post reads, "Those small hands are a sign of absolute tenderness," and people are loving the immediate mirthful reaction the pair had to the wee one's curious little fingers.

"Nothing cuter than seeing a baby flailing their arms and slapping things because they are happy. They have no control. They just know they’re happy."

'The baby slaps 'yep this is good arm' tap tap."

"My grandma had the softest bat wings in the world. I used to love to touch them. I’m sure she was self conscious about it but I loved them lol."

"As a parent I would be horrified to discover my kid was doing this but so relieved that they were such good sports about it. These are the types of people we need on airplanes."

"Same, I’m always concerned how my kid behaves on a plane ride (and he freaking loves being on a plane) but I find most people to be such good sports around him. Love when it works out that way. Though I 10/10 would have snatched that hand away soon as I noticed 😂😂😂."

"The people laughing were so kind! I can imagine some people would lose it if a child did this but they just enjoyed it. 🥰"

"Seriously! Seeing the humor in everyday life says a lot about their temperament. They seem like great folks."

Some people shared their own stories of toddlers similarly pawing at perfect strangers. It's helpful to remember that these little ones have only been on the planet for a hot minute and they barely have anything figured out yet. The nuances of what and whom to touch and not to touch takes a while, as does having the impulse control to not just reach out and feel whatever looks soft or interesting in the moment.

"Oh my gosh, that reminded me of a time when my son was small, maybe 18 months? We were in line at a restaurant and he was toddling around my legs and holding on to my finger while I chatted with my sister and mom. I felt him let go, and looked down to see where he was off to. He was standing by a lady a couple of people ahead of me who was wearing fishnet tights. He was rubbing her leg with his tiny baby hands and looked just MESMERIZED. I, on the other hand, was absolutely mortified and grabbed him up, apologizing all over the place, but luckily she was very cool about it and was just laughing.

Little kids like to just touch stuff to learn more about the world around them, but parents need to be constantly paying attention so their kid doesn't accidentally harass someone!"

"A little kid of around that age did this to me at restaurant once- he walked up to me, rubbed my bare forearm, and then gave me that same mesmerized look and tapped me with his hand a couple times. I didn't think too much of it (was more puzzled/confused than anything), but his mom had to pick him up and apologized anyway. Kids are funny haha."

"Yes this is so adorable. The last time I took a flight with a kid sitting behind me he was kicking my seat for like two hours before I politely turned around and gave a look to his mother and said 'hey my little friend. I know this flight is long and you wanna get out of this seat but do you mind not kicking my seat anymore?' Then I gave him a piece of paper and some (like 5 out of my 50) colored pencils and asked him if he could make me a secret drawing and pass it to me quietly and I’d make him one. I’m an artist and I always carry watercolors and colored pencils and sketch books on flights. We ended up passing drawing back and forth for the rest of the remaining 5 hour flight. He didn’t kick my seat again… I suspect it was the poignant look I gave mom. But so he was engaged. Every 20 minutes or so I’d feel a little tap on my arm and a folded up little drawing would appear. I still have them in the pocket of a moleskin somewhere."

Here's to grownups joyfully embracing the reality of co-existing with small children, in all their curious, sensory-driven, hands-on glory.

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Village People singer tries to deny that ‘Y.M.C.A.’ is a gay anthem and fails spectacularly

So, you're saying it's the ultimate gay anthem, right?

via Mario Casciano/WikimediaCommons

The Village People in 1978.

“Y.M.C.A.,” the 1978 disco smash by the Village People, has recently experienced a renaissance. In November, it hit #1 on Billboard’s Dance/Digital Song Sales chart after being prominently featured in Donald Trump’s rallies since 2020. Trump's dance, where he pumps his fists back and forth to the song, has also become a popular celebration dance in the sports world.

“You know what gets ’em rockin? ‘Y.M.C.A.,’” Trump said on a podcast in 2022, according to NBC News. “‘Y.M.C.A.’ gets people up and it gets them moving.” However, many people have noted the irony that Trump and his conservative supporters have embraced the song, given its reputation for being a gay anthem.



Who are the Village People?

The song was written by the Village People’s lead singer, Victor Willis who is straight and producer Jacques Morali who is gay.

The Village People is a disco group of predominantly gay men who symbolize American masculinity and macho gay-fantasy personas. The band is fronted by Victor Willis, who played a police officer, with backing vocalists and dancers featuring a cowboy, construction worker, native American, leatherman, and GI.



The band was put together to appeal to a gay audience that loved disco music, but their mainstream success meant that some in the audience missed the gay references but still loved bopping to massive hits such as “Macho Man” and “In the Navy.” Trump and his supporters' embrace of the song have many wondering if the Village People effect was happening again. Are Trump supporters oblivious to the fact that “Y.M.C.A.” is known as a gay anthem, or is it just not a big deal to them? While Trump himself has generally been supportive of gay and lesbian individual (he was the first Republican to feature a gay speaker at a presidential convention in 2016) the Republican Party has long been opposed to LGBT rights.



Is 'Y.M.C.A.' a gay anthem?

On December 2, 2024, Willis made a bold proclamation on his Facebook page, denying that the song was a gay anthem while simultaneously illustrating its undeniably gay roots. “There’s been a lot of talk, especially of late, that Y.M.C.A. is somehow a gay anthem. As I’ve said numerous times in the past, that is a false assumption based on the fact that my writing partner was gay, and some (not all) of Village People were gay, and that the first Village People album was totally about gay life,” Willis wrote.

“This assumption is also based on the fact that the YMCA was apparently being used as some sort of gay hangout and since one of the writers was gay and some of the Village People are gay, the song must be a message to gay people. To that I say once again, get your minds out of the gutter. It is not,” he continued.



Randy Jones, who played the cowboy in the group, tells a different story when discussing the song's origins. In 2008, he claimed he took Morali to the McBurney YMCA on Manhattan’s West 23rd Street around four times in 1977 and the producer was “fascinated” by the place.

“Plus, with Jacques being gay, I had a lot of friends I worked out with who were in the adult film industry, and he was impressed by meeting people he had seen in the videos and magazines. Those visits with me planted a seed in him, and that’s how he got the idea for ‘Y.M.C.A,'” Jones said.

Willis refutes the idea that Morali gave him the idea for the song in his Facebook post. “As I stated on numerous occasions, I knew nothing about the Y being a hang out for gays when I wrote the lyrics to Y.M.C.A. and Jacques Morali (who was gay) never once stated such to me,” he wrote. “In fact, Jacques never once told me how to write my lyrics otherwise I would have said to him, you don’t need me, why don’t you simply write the lyrics.”



Although Willis wrote the song and has the right to determine what it’s about, he does a poor job of claiming it isn’t a gay anthem after admitting it was written in collaboration with a gay man for a predominantly gay group in a genre with a big gay audience and an album called "Cruisin'" about a place that was known for gay hookups.

That is a helluva coincidence, don't you think?

Donald Trump Head Nod GIFGiphy

Further, regardless of Willis’ intentions with the song, it has been embraced by the gay community as an anthem. An artist can control what he creates, but how the audience reacts is beyond their control. When a group of predominantly gay men sings about a “young man” who can find “everything for you men to enjoy” and “many ways to have a good time” as they “hang out with all the boys,” it’s impossible to divorce the words from the context.

That’s the beauty of music. A song can have multiple meanings depending on who is performing it. On the other hand, if a traditionally masculine singer such as Rod Stewert or James Brown had sung “Macho Man,” it would have meant something entirely different back in 1978.

It’s also worth noting that Trump was not Willis’ preferred candidate in the election and he found his use of the song in the past a “nuisance.” He also doesn’t mind “that gays think of the song as their anthem” but that it was meant to appeal to “people of all stripes.” That being said, Willis says that starting in January 2025, any news organization that “falsely” refers to “Y.M.C.A.” as a gay anthem will be sued.

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Joy

Dog owner dressed up as dog's favorite toy and his reaction was seriously adorable

The life-sized Mr. Quackers was almost too much joy for Charlie to handle.

Charlie the Golden 18/YouTube

Charlie the golden retriever got to experience a life-sized Mr. Quackers and it was sheer joy.

The first thing you need to know about Charlie the golden retriever is that he loves Mr. Quackers. Mr. Quackers is Charlie's stuffed yellow duck. Charlie carries him around everywhere, he loves him so.

@charliethegolden18

I always so happ to see my lil bro 😋 #dogsoftiktok #petsoftiktok #dogs #goldenretriever





Anyone who's had a dog with a favorite stuffy knows that it's a bit like a child with a favorite stuffy. As long as the stuffy is there, all is well. If stuffy goes missing, all hell breaks loose. Nobody take the stuffy away. Nobody lose the stuffy. Nobody mess with the stuffy.

Where they go, their stuffy goes.

Where Charlie goes, Mr. Quackers goes.

That's just the way it is.

@charliethegolden18 Happens every..single..time 😂🙈 #dogsoftiktok #petsoftiktok #dogs #goldenretriever ♬ Quirky - Oleg Kirilkov

The attachment is real. Watch what happens when Charlie's buddy Buddy tries to mess with Mr. Quackers.

@charliethegolden18

Ain’t nobody touching my Mr. Quackers 😋 #dogsoftiktok #petsoftiktok #dogs #goldenretriever

"There, see it!" Oh, Charlie. His love for Mr. Quackers is unrivaled, which is why his owner decided to pull an incredible pet prank and dress up as Mr. Quackers himself.

@charliethegolden18

When your husband finds a costume that looks identical to your dogs favorite duck toy 😂 #dogsoftiktok #petsoftiktok #dogs #goldenretriever

The things we do for our dogs, indeed.

And when Charlie got to meet the life-sized Mr. Quackers? So. Much. Joy.

@charliethegolden18

Dressed up as our dogs favorite duck toy. Full video on FB & YouTube. Link in bio. #dogsoftiktok #petsoftiktok #dogs #goldenretriever

Charlie practically wagged his tail right off his body. And he never let go of the original Mr. Quackers the whole time—at least on TikTok.

The extended video on YouTube shows Charlie dropping Mr. Quackers and trying to get a hold of Huge Mr. Quackers by the neck. Not in an aggressive way—more like in a "Hey, lemme carry you around like I do Mr. Quackers!" kind of way.

And then the slow discovery that Huge Mr. Quackers smells an awful lot like his hooman … just too precious.

Animals can bring such joy to our lives, especially when we take the time to play with them. Thanks, Charlie's parents, for sharing this moment of adorable delight with us all.

Follow more of Charlie and Mr. Quackers' adventures on TikTok and YouTube.


This article originally appeared two years ago.

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52 percent of people won't answer the door for a stranger. A cop says that's a huge mistake.

Pretending you're not home isn't the best idea.

officerarsenault/TikTok & Paul Downey/Flickr

Ask anyone Millennial and younger what the scariest sound in the world is, and you'll get some interesting answers. Your phone buzzing with an actual, honest-to-God phone call would be one. Someone unexpectedly knocking on your door would be the other. For many of us, when we look out the window and see someone we don't recognize approaching our house, the instinct is to pretend we're not home.

Door-to-door salesmen and solicitors are still shockingly common, and the only thing worse than an unexpected knock from a stranger is that same stranger being a pushy and aggressive salesman who won't take No for an answer! So staying quiet and waiting for them to leave seems like a reasonable strategy to avoid anxiety and conflict.

A police officer on TikTok just issued a word of caution for us introverts who like to hide out from knocking strangers: "Don't do that."

Officer Randall Arsenault, a former policeman from Canada and a super popular TikTok creator, shared the warning in a recently reposted video.

"Somebody comes to your home during the day, knocks on the door, rings the doorbell, and you don't answer because you don't want to be bothered? Don't do that, OK?"

"Two minutes later, they kick in your door, it's a daytime break and enter, happens all the time. ... They get inside your house, they panic, not expect anybody to be there, bad things can happen."

It's sound advice. Most home intruders, believe it or not, aren't looking to hurt anyone and would rather avoid a potentially violent confrontation. They'd much prefer an easy chance to walk around and take what they want. So by pretending to not be home, you actually make yourself a perfect target.

@officerarsenault

WARNING! Extremely important message. #onthisday

Which... is a total bummer if you get knock-anxiety.

"Ugh this is an introverts worst fear. Having to interact with people when they don’t want to," wrote one commenter.

So what should you do instead?

"Yell through, wave them off through the window, act like you're on your cell phone already," Officer Arsenault says.

In other words, alert them to your presence in any way that you can! That doesn't mean you fling the door open and invite them in. But making noise or even speaking to them through the closed and locked door are good ideas. Some people who are home alone will even pretend to speak (loudly) with a spouse, partner, or friend who's not actually there. Call for your "dad" or "husband" to come over, and that's often enough to spook low-level burglars.

Chances are, the person knocking is just a salesman or doing some political canvassing. But handling those unexpected knocks the right way could be a legitimate lifesaver.

A recent survey by YouGov found that less than half of Americans are willing to answer the door when a stranger knocks. Over a third will ignore them, and another 17% aren't sure.

man's eye looking through peepholeMario Heller/Unsplash

The dividing lines among generations were fascinating in the study.

Less than 10% of Baby Boomers reported feeling afraid when receiving unexpected knocks (though they were high on annoyance, to no one's surprise — I'm pretty sure they invented the No Soliciting sign).

15% of Millennials said they felt afraid when someone knocked on the door, and over 20% of Gen Z said the same. Younger generations also reported much higher rates of feeling confused at IRL knocks.

On the plus side, younger generations also feel more excited when people knock on their doors. It's unique and novel, so there's an immediate sense of possibility that's always fun — a bit like getting actual mail in your mailbox that's not a bill or an advertisement.

You can point to the rise of social media and texting, plus the COVID-19 pandemic, as a big reason for a dropoff in in-person interactions. Millennials and Gen-Z are less comfortable with unexpected encounters because they're so much more rare. Our friends and family almost always call or text before they come over, so it makes sense that a random knock might give us a scare.

Officer Arsenault's safety advice is more pertinent than ever as the generations that hate answering the door become apartment-renters and homeowners.

Our anxiety at dealing with annoying solicitors and potential evil-doers is totally justified, but our usual coping method of ignoring isn't a good solution. Screening calls and sitting on texts is all well and good, but when it comes to our homes, we have to proudly announce our presence for our own safety!

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Pianist shares the surprise note he received from his neighbor with a very specific request

He thought it was going to be a noise complaint.

Photo credit: Canva, Reddit

More neighbors stories like this, please.

A pianist had been practicing in their apartment, when they noticed a handwritten note had been slipped under their door from a neighbor in the unit. Understandably, this person had fully anticipated being told to “knock it off,” “keep the noise down,” or some other version of a complaint. After all, isn’t that the only reason neighbors reach out to one another nowadays?

But much to their surprise, this note wasn’t a complaint at all. But merely a “humble request” for the pianist to play “Liebestraum No. 3 in A flat.” Pleasantly surprised, the pianist did just that, and it was met with a raucous applause coming from a balcony a few stories up.

The pianist was so taken aback by the “lovely” gesture that they shared it, along with the note, to folks online. Needless to say, they found it equally wholesome.


A humble request (:
byu/Toast_n_mustard inMadeMeSmile


“That makes my heart smile 😻,” one person commented on Reddit.

“Love this! We need more of this,” shared another.

Still another wrote, “I can imagine it so perfectly. The quiet little slide of the note, the pause of space waiting if the pianist will accept their request, the mystery of never knowing who either person is but connected by the love of music.”

A few others could recall a similar kind of fondness felt when hearing their neighbors play live music.

“I lived in an apartment complex that had a field next to it. One Sunday I got woken up by bagpipe music. Someone was standing in the field playing the best bagpipes I ever heard! By the time I got dressed to go out and watch he was gone,” one person wrote.

Meanwhile, another said, “One of my neighbors has a side business tuning instruments so I often hear him playing his piano or various string instruments (mostly violin), and it's really nice. Coming home from a crap day at work is easier when I can hear some nice music now and then.”

It was such a simple act on the neighbor’s part, and yet, it made such a profound and positive impact—not only on the pianist’s life, but the lives of those whole bore witness to the story. And it goes to show that while, yes, maybe playing excessively loud and thrashing music into the wee hours of the night isn’t going to go over well if you’re an apartment dweller, sharing something lovely might be a perfect way of uniting with folks you might have never otherwise spoken to.

And for those curious, “Liebestraum No. 3 in A flat” sounds a little something like this:

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Yep. The only proper way to respond to hearing this in your apartment building is with enthusiastic clapping. They seriously got a classical music concert for free!

And remember—while we might more frequently hear stories of neighbors being annoyed with each other, or flat out never interacting at all, there are plenty of moments happening just like this one. Strangers coming together, connecting, and enjoying life.

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