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Equality

A Black flight attendant shared an unexpectedly uplifting exchange with a white Fortune 500 CEO

A Black flight attendant shared an unexpectedly uplifting exchange with a white Fortune 500 CEO
JacqueRae Hill/Facebook

Sometimes a random encounter turns out to be not so random at all.

JacqueRae Hill, a flight attendant for Southwest Airlines, shared one such encounter on Facebook. She said that her heart has been heavy with everything going on, which is especially hard hard when your job is to put a smile on people's face. But something happened on a recent flight that lifted her spirits.

She wrote:

"As we are boarding my first flight of the day I smile and I greet people when they come on and a man was holding a book that has been on my to read list. The book is entitled White Fragility. I was so happy to see that book in his grasp that I knew after I finished my duties I was going to make a point to ask him about it. I go sit next to him as he was sitting in a row all by himself (That was God). I said Hey How are you? I see you are reading that book .. So how is it? He replies oh I'm half way through it's really good. It really points out how important these conversations on race are. As I began to respond the tears just start falling . I have been so sad every day and I just want to understand and be understood so we can began to fix it.

I'm pretty sure I startled him by seemingly dumping all my emotions on him but his reply was "I'm so sorry. And it's our fault that this is like this. We continued to talk and when I tell you it was everything I needed. I was happy ( even tho I was crying ). I went on to tell him about my prayer on my way to work today and that he Answered that prayer for me with this conversation. As our conversation came to an end he asks me my name I told him JacqueRae and then he said well I'm Doug Parker the CEO of American Airlines. I told him my mother works for him in DC and then I reached over and gave him a BIG HUG ! I HAD TO!! (yes we were both masked) I thanked him for being open and allowing this conversation to happen because I just needed to hear it and I walked off. I thanked God for his LOVE AND FAITHFULNESS the rest of the Flight. On his way off the plane he hands me a handwritten note and I thank him again and ask for this pic. This encounter is Only A Holy Spirit thing!!!!

There are so many different ways to affect change in the world. I stand with anyone who wants to make a difference no matter if it is how I would do it or not. I believe that God answered my prayer so perfectly that I want to be apart of an answered prayer for someone else. I'm following behind my sister Audresha Lynn by saying LETS TALK !! Doug Parker said that the premise of the book is that we need to have these conversations so here I am. My heart is open and my ears are open as well. BLESSED TO BE A BLESSING."

The note Parker wrote to her said:

"Thank you so much for coming back to speak with me. It was a gift from God and an inspiration to me. I am saddened that we as a society have progressed so slowly on an issue that has such a clear right v.s wrong. Much of the problem is we don't talk about it enough. Thank you for talking to me and sharing your emotion. That took courage. The book, White Fragility, is great. But it's more for people like me than you (a black friend recommended it to me). I really appreciate you. If you'd like to continue the conversation, my email is [blacked out]. Thank you! Doug

P.S. Say hello to your mother for me."

Hill's also shared a message from her mother, Patti Anderson, to Doug Anderson, and the beautiful exchanges just keep on going.

JacqueRae S. Hill/Facebook

Hill shared that CNN Travel picked up her story and interviewed her via video call, so we can hear some of the story in her own voice.

[facebook https://www.facebook.com/jacquerae.hill/videos/10156166752157706/?__xts__[0]=68.ARAzZqYx6Xi3WGu5xbAv8eyAnfPyap4JRvzfD5Ic0o4OWoEtB-Pd4mCBkEvFoZ3x66R59k9G81HP4OJ_U8m-zhV0Pd8irEaPMSFbymaqeAgr8c6pbudv5cCIbjgy2LC2BEUiZOAmJWzoAxW1aeN-vTKR2BedUJD9aE1FuhuJ6i7alKHMXmC1YXIPIY9QQDDHSt01jJN_axJXjpPCdOrJJ6IAyfUMMw&__tn__=-R expand=1]

You never know when a seemingly small action—like reading a book to better understand the realities of race and racism in our society—might made a big difference to someone who sees it. Knowing that someone in charge of an enormous company is doing that personal work—and not just for a photo op or PR display—is heartening to see, as the lessons learned will hopefully trickle down through that business and beyond.

Thank you for sharing, Ms. Hill. Seeing this kind of encounter play out offers us all a taste of hope in a time of difficult, but necessary, upheaval and change.

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Joy

Adorable Golden Retriever absolutely loses it when he runs into his vet at a bar

No one has ever been this excited to see their doctor.

@cosmo_andtheoddparents/TikTok

He wuvs his vet.

Not every dog might jump with joy after seeing their vet out in public. But for Cosmo the Golden Retriever, it was practically Christmas all over again when he spotted his own vet, Dr. Jones, at a brewery.

In an adorable clip posted to TikTok, we see Cosmo in pure, unadulterated bliss as he snuggles with an equally happy Dr. Jones, who, considering he’s still in his scrubs, might have just gotten out of work to grab a quick pint.

Watch:

@cosmo_andtheoddparents When you run into your vet in public #goldenretrieversoftiktok #vetlife #animallovers #petparents #goldenretriever #goldenretrievers #doglife #dogmom #dailyfluff #charlestondogs #doglover #charlestondog #brewerydog ♬ original sound - Cosmo

Ugh, the cuteness is too much to handle! People in the comments could barely contain their secondhand joy.

“He looked over like, “Mom, do you see who this is?” one person wrote, while another said, “What in the Hallmark movie? Adorable!!”

One person even joked, “Did we all check the vet’s hand for a wedding ring? (Said as a married woman. Looking out for you all, or something.)”

According to Hannah Dweikat, Cosmo’s owner, the two actually share quite a history. She tells Upworthy that when Cosmo was but a wee pup, he “gave a scare” after eating a Sago Palm seed, which are highly toxic to dogs, from a plant in their backyard, which of course resulted in him being rushed to the animal hospital and staying there over the weekend.

While that’s every pet owner’s worst nightmare, and certainly a scary situation for the poor fur baby, Dweikat says that “the calm and patient demeanor” of Dr. Jones and his staff put Cosmo at ease. And because of this, “Cosmo has always loved going to see his friends—especially because they give him lots of treats and snuggles.”

Cosmo and Dr. Jones’ buddyship has also blossomed thanks to proximity, as Dweikat only lives down the street from the clinic. “Which means we get to see Dr. Jones and his staff out in public at times and Cosmo takes every chance he can get to say hi,” she explains. This time, however, she was able to capture it all on video. Yay for us!

What makes a good vet?

While not every vet, however gifted, will be able to elicit this type of reaction from their patients, having a calming presence like Dr. Jones is certainly a good sign for pet owners to be on the lookout for when shopping around for their own vet. But that’s not the only quality a good vet needs. According to Saint Matthews University, a vet also needs to have high stamina (both physically and mentally), as well as an ability to tolerate unpleasant situations (you can’t faint at the sight of blood or vomit), a high level of emotional intelligence (maybe all doctors should possess this skill, but especially those who work with animals), adaptability, a sense of enthusiasm, and finally, excellent communication skills.

Dr. Jones seems to have these attributes in spades, and his patients clearly love him for it. None so much as Cosmo, obviously.

By the way, if you’re in need of even more content featuring this precious pup, you can follow Cosmo on both TikTok and Instagram.

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Culture

Watch: Joyful 18-month-old toddler learns how to do the Māori haka dance

"The world has never needed the haka more than it does now."

Photo credit: Canva

This toddler learning haka dance is taking over the Internet.

The haka is a Māori tradition that originated as a war dance. In recent years, people around the world have come to know and love the passionate performance. The emphatic, rhythmic gestures, wide eyes, and chanted words grace screens across multiple countries on a near daily basis, often bringing viewers to tears.

Having a window into such a rich culture can make people curious on how cultural traditions like the haka are passed down. Surely Māori babies aren't born knowing this dance instinctively, nor is there a magic switch that flips when they reach a certain age. One family gave a little glimpse into how the culture is passed down from one generation to the next and it's beyond adorable.

In late 2024, New Zealand wife and mum Hope Lawrence uploaded a video of her 18-month-old practicing the haka with his dad in the dining room, and the little guy is surprisingly good. In the video, the baby starts off with a stomp and grunt as his dad shows him the wero, which is the trembling hand often seen in the dance. As the dad walks back and forth starting the chant along with wero, the little one tries his best to mimic his dad.

Before too long the toddler is chanting along and copying the dad's moves almost exactly, even if you can't quite make out what the little guy is saying, his haka is still powerful. This isn't the first time the baby has been caught doing the haka. Just a month before the adorable video, he was caught practicing his haka along with the New Zealand rugby team All Blacks on the family television. His tiny haka moves have taken social media by storm with over 53 million views, 7.1 million likes, and more than 53K comments.


@hopeylawrence Teach them the way young 😍 Keep our culture going #haka #maoritok #fyp #hakawithdad #maori #aotearoa #newzealand #maoritiktok #culture #pukana #kamate #parliament #toitutetiriti #dad #standtall #tamariki ♬ original sound - Hope Lawrence

People cannot get enough of his powerful little dance, with one person writing, "The Haka is so powerful but seeing this father teaching his baby is so much powerful. I am deeply moved."

Another person thinks the dance is just the light people need to see right now, saying, "The world has never needed the haka more than it does now."

Someone else noticed the confidence exuding from the toddler, noting, "The way y'all were in complete cadence together with the leg slap... he came in with confidence because of you, and y'all nailed it perfectly together."


@hopeylawrence Our little haka obsessed boy practicing his Kia Rite 😍 😍 #pov #hakapractice #haka #nzhaka #fyp #pukana #viral #kiarite #maori #NZ #nztiktok #aus #nzmaori #allblacks #newzealandallblacks #haka #hakaleader ♬ original sound - Hope Lawrence

One viewer appreciates the peek into another culture, saying, "I LOVE THIS!!! if it wasn't for tik tok I would've never been exposed to Māori culture. can't tell you how many Haka performances I've watched. they make me feel so empowered."

Appreciation of culture being passed down is a common theme among commenters with one saying, "This is truly beautiful to watch, not just because the father is keeping interaction and culture with child, but it's keeping a beautiful culture present... some other cultures didn't have this."

@hopeylawrence The haka is on repeatt😅 #haka #babyhaka #maoritok #maori #culture #hakatime #fyp #toitutetiriti #aotearoa #pukana #viral 📸 credit:@Zealan_lawrence ♬ Ngā iwi E - Live - Creative Nātives

Many people who watch the haka have a deeply emotional reaction they can't explain even though they have no personal connection to the culture. The dance seems to speak to a part of humans that may be missing their ancestral connections, possibly awakening some dormant longing. There's no real way to know for sure, but the amount of people who report being brought to tears every time the dance is performed is significant. This baby will surely keep his culture alive as he grows into adulthood, likely teaching his own child as his father taught him.


This article originally appeared last year.

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Popular

Surprising 16-year-long ADHD study reveals opposite of what researchers expected

The findings shed new light on how we might one day understand and manage ADHD.

Unsplash

There's still so much to learn.

Our understanding of ADHD has come a long way in just a few short years. Though it wasn't even formally recognized as a medical condition until the 1960s, by the time the 90s rolled around, diagnoses and stimulant prescriptions were extremely prevalent. Today, diagnoses and treatment are a lot more thoughtful and individualized, and there are more options for treatment and therapy. Even with all these advancements, though, we still have more to learn.

A new long-term study published in the Journal of Clinical Psychiatry has proven to be an excellent next step in getting a better understanding of the disorder.

Researchers studied 483 participants who were diagnosed with ADHD in childhood and continued to assess them for a period of 16 years. The study's authors wanted to get a sense of how ADHD symptoms might change over time.

What the researchers found surprised them. In most participants, symptoms of ADHD fluctuated greatly over the years. What surprised them even more were the environmental factors that seemed to play a role in those fluctuations.


a close up of a human brain on a white backgroundUnderstanding our brains is an ongoing process. Photo by BUDDHI Kumar SHRESTHA on Unsplash

Researchers expected that greater life demands—like more responsibility at work, a heavier workload at school, major life changes, etc.—would exacerbate ADHD symptoms. What they found was the opposite.

It makes sense that a person that struggles with inattention or hyperactivity might have more trouble focusing when they have more "going on" and more distractions to pull them in different directions. It was a huge surprise to the researchers that, actually, people's ADHD symptoms seemed to ease up when life got hectic.

“We expected the relationship between environmental demands and ADHD symptoms to be the opposite of what we found,” study author, professor, and clinical psychologist Margaret H. Sibley explained. “We hypothesized that when life demands and responsibilities increased, this might exacerbate people’s ADHD, making it more severe. In fact, it was the opposite. The higher the demands and responsibilities one was experiencing, the milder their ADHD.”

I have a 4-year-old with ADHD and the findings totally track for me.

We find it's actually easier to be in perpetual motion sometimes—out running errands, doing activities, visiting friends and family—versus staying put too long. When we're just relaxing at home, that's when she tends to start bouncing off the walls!

Doing nothing or doing very little is not often a restful state for people with ADHD. Typically, people with ADHD experience more background noise than neurotypical brains—so a quiet, seemingly restful environment can sometimes amplify racing thoughts, negative self-talk, and impulsive behavior versus dampening it. Of course, as always in science, you have to be careful assuming causation from the findings.

a boy doing schoolwork at wooden deskQuiet can make it hard to focus. Annie Spratt/Unsplash

It's important to note that the results of the study don't definitively prove that being busy causes a decrease in ADHD symptoms. “This might mean that people with ADHD perform their best in more demanding environments (perhaps environments that have stronger immediate consequences, like needing to put food on the table for a family or pay rent monthly). It also might mean that people with ADHD take more on their plate when their symptoms are relatively at bay," Sibley says. Either way, the correlation is certainly strong and worthy of more study.

In the meantime, the study's authors think the results could be viewed in a hopeful light for people just learning to manage their ADHD. “If you’re a doctor talking with a patient who is first getting diagnosed with ADHD, it’s a huge help for that person to hear the message that, ‘You’re going to have good years and not-so-good years, but things can go really well for you if you can get the right factors in place,'” Sibley said.

We're learning more and more about what those factors are—what might exacerbate symptoms and what types of things can help—and we're starting to get a clearer picture of how people can manage this challenging disorder.


This article originally appeared last year.

adhd
Parenting

His mother gave him a 'husbands in training' course as a child. Every parent should do it.

Learning how to be a good spouse shouldn't just be something we pick up by accident.

via Doug Weaver/TikTok

Doug Weaver explains "Husbands in Training."

Even though the marriage rate in the United States is on a steep decline, chances are that the majority of kids growing up today will get married at some point in their lives. If current trends continue, about half of those will end in divorce.

Research published in the Couple and Family Psychology journal found that the top five reasons for divorce are a lack of commitment, infidelity, too much conflict, getting married young, and financial problems.

Wouldn’t it be great if we were taught from a young age how to be a good spouse so we could avoid these pitfalls? But in American culture, most of us aren’t taught the specifics of how to have a happy and healthy marriage. Most of us tend to pick things up from watching the married people in our orbit, most likely our parents.

No comment on how that's going.

Artist Doug Weaver had a much different upbringing. His mother, Mickey, made a curriculum for him and his two older brothers when they were kids to help them be great husbands when they got married.

"When I was a kid, my mom did this thing for me and my two older brothers called 'Husbands in Training,'" he explained in a TikTok video that has more than 5.9 million views. "It was a full, multiple-level curriculum on how to be a better husband."

Weaver says the training covered topics from chivalry to eating to a rather uncomfortable discussion on "the ethics of the porn industry." His mother also stressed the importance of listening to women and identifying when another man may be giving them trouble.

"There was a lot of really good stuff in that curriculum," Doug said. "There were things like what to do if your spouse says something and the information they give is wrong. How to handle it if they say something wrong in public versus in private, when it is appropriate to correct them and when it isn't."

Weaver’s mother was also way ahead of her time because she made a big deal about teaching her sons the importance of consent. "We talked about consent, we talked about the basics of respecting and honoring women and listening to women, and all of the things that really just make you a decent human being," Doug explained.

@dougweaverart

Husbands in training! #parenting #storytime #story

The lessons were so powerful that even Weaver’s father decided to take the course. "A lot of the things that we were learning from my mom were things that he was never taught growing up,” Weaver said. "So, he decided he also wanted to take 'Husbands in Training.'"

The course officially ended when Weaver and his brothers got married. "My mom even made certificates of completion that she signed and gave to each of us on our wedding day," he shared in his TikTok clip.

However, the video Weaver shared was so popular on TikTok that he’s making his mother’s course available to the general public. “After posting about ‘Husbands in Training’ on TikTok, the TT community really wants my mom to produce content about raising boys to be good men,” he wrote on a GoFundMe fundraising campaign in 2022.

The overwhelming response to Weaver’s TikTok has inspired a new YouTube channel to spread Mickey’s lessons far and wide. But it has also made a lot of people realize that teaching people how to be great spouses is a lifelong journey and should be a major part of child-rearing. Learning how to be a good spouse shouldn't just be something we pick up by accident.


This article originally appeared three years ago.


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Pop Culture

Woman who lives on a cruise ship for free shares the 4 things she can’t do

Living on a ship isn’t perfect. It’s just close to perfect.

via Pixabay/Pexels

Upworthy has covered a few stories about people who decided to live permanently on cruise ships because it's cheaper than living on land or in a nursing home. These stories have connected with millions because they say a lot about the modern cost of living but are also aspirational.

Christine Kesteloo has become popular on TikTok with over 680,000 followers because she shares what living on a cruise ship is really like. Kesteloo is the wife of the ship’s Staff Chief Engineer, so she gets to live on the boat for free. She only has to pay for alcohol and soda, which she gets for half off according to Business Insider.

“I live on a cruise ship for half the year with my husband, and it's often as glamorous as it sounds,” she told Insider. “After all, I don't cook, clean, make my bed, do laundry or pay for food.“

Kesteloo’s life seems pretty stress-free. After all, she's basically on a permanent vacation. However, even though she lives on a cruise ship as a “wife on board,” there are a few things she either can’t or shouldn’t do.

She shared these four things in a TikTok video with nearly 10 million views.

@dutchworld_americangirl

I go through four things I can, and cannot do it while living on the cruise ship with my husband #weliveonacruiseship #4things #alaskacruise #cruiseship #cruiseshiplife #cruise #alaska #caribbeancruise #cruiselife #livingstsea #getreadywithme

1. No gambling

Kesteloo says she cannot sit at a slot machine and “play my heart out until I win.” She believes it would “look a little weird if I, as the wife of the staff chief engineer, won a big jackpot.”

2. Can’t leave the ship with the guests

When the ship arrives at a destination, she can't get off with the guests. She must wait about an hour and exit the vessel with the crew. When returning to the ship, she also has to be on time. “No, they will not wait for us,” she says. And the same goes for her husband, if they “miss the ship, someone else will take over the role.”

3. Sit in a crowded pool

Although Kesteloo has access to the pool, gym, and all the ship’s amenities, she’s cautious not to interfere with the guests' good time. She’ll exit the pool if it’s busy because “it’s just the right thing to do.”

4. Must have international traveler insurance

She must have insurance in case of a misfortune on the ship. But as a citizen of the Netherlands, they already have coverage and just have to pay a few extra dollars a month.

Some of the most popular commenters on the video were from women regretting that they married men who aren’t chief engineers on cruise ships or those who want to know where to find a single one.

"OK, can you explain how to marry a cruise ship engineer?" one female commentator wrote.

"How. in. the. H E double hockey sticks do I become the wife of a cruise ship engineer???? I don’t have to work AND cruise for free!" another added.

"Does he have any single friends with same job??? Asking for me," one more asked.

It's a charmed life!


This article originally appeared last year.

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